01x01 - The End of the Beginning and the Beginning of the End

[bunniefuu]

[SUBARU coughing]

[SUBARU]

No...

This is bad...

Very bad...

[SATELLA]

Subaru?

What's wrong?

I see where this is going.

It's how they suck you in.

[SUBARU]

Run away!

Get out of here!

[sighs]

[SATELLA screams]

Ah, maybe this one instead.

[SUBARU]

Stay with me...

That's 363 yen.

[SUBARU]

A jagged-edge ten.

[SUBARU]

Hang on...

No matter what...

[SUBARU]

...I'm gonna save you...

That's what I get for holing up in my room all day gaming.

Guess my eyes are tired.

[bell tolls]

[SUBARU]

What's going on?

I'd say I was dreaming, but this is obviously really happening.

Totally not fake.

So does this mean...

...I've been summoned across the universe to another world?!

Well, from the looks of things, I'd say this is some kind of fantasy world with a medieval-style culture.

A realm where demihumans are commonplace, and there's always a w*r or an adventure to go on.

And in this magical world, I must've...

[CARRIAGE DRIVER]

Hey!

Watch out!

This is it!

It's totally happening!

This must be an event pop where I'll learn to produce magic!

Ha!

[KNIGHT A]

Look out!

[KNIGHT A laughs]

Yes!

Woo!

[BOY A]

Well done!

Guess it's a little too early for me to use magic in this world.

[SUBARU]

I can't read any of this.

[KADOMON]

Hey, boy.

Those are some weird-lookin' clothes.

You're not from around here, are ya?

So are these...?

Appas, the freshest you'll find.

[SUBARU]

At least we speak the same language.

Let's see if...

Huh?

Where's that money from?

You can't use that stuff out here in Lugunica.

And if that's all you got, then you're flat broke.

So don't waste my time, freeloader!

Get outta here!

That answers that.

Guess I'll have to stick to good old information gathering.

[ALL scream]

This place is for demihumans only!

[SUBARU]

Ow!

My eye!

I can't...

see...

[screams]

Is this how it's supposed to be?

'Cause none of it makes sense.

This is a different-world summons, right?!

Where's my main character set-up and status bar?

Damn.

Tch.

[SUBARU]

Looks like my cell phone still works.

But there's no point in even having it now!

And the gear they've started me off with is a joke!

If you're gonna summon lazy-ass kids like me to your world, you'd better overhaul your crappy welfare program!

Start me off with an Excalibur sword or a magic cloak!

And besides, if I were transported all this way, where's the cute girl who brought me here?

Why would she do that and then bail on me?

Yes!

You're finally here!

It's nice to meet you, cute girl...

What are you goin' on and on about?

If you don't wanna get hurt, cough up whatever you've got!

Aw, crap.

It's already "compulsory event" time.

[FELT]

Move it, move it!

Move it, you guys!

Hurry!

Outta my way!

Yes!

I knew you'd find me eventually, cute girl who summoned me!

[FELT]

Hm?

Summoned?

I dunno what you're talkin' about, but I'm really busy!

Sorry!

Now live strong, okay?

Wait, what?!

Where are you going?!

[SUBARU]

So did seeing that make you feel any less hostile by any chance?

Actually, it rained on our parade and made things worse.

Of course, it did...

[SUBARU]

Calm down, Subaru Natsuki.

Since ancient times, it's the rule that anyone summoned into a different world displays supernatural powers!

If I just believe in myself hard enough, those powers will kick on and pave my way to future glory!

[SUBARU]

You lumps of EXP!

That's the first time I ever hit somebody!

Guess I never expected it to hurt me!

But it doesn't matter.

Because this world is set up so I'll be strong!

My adrenaline is surging!

I can do anything!

[yelps]

[SUBARU]

I'm sorry, I'm sorry!

It was all my fault!

Seriously!

Forgive me!

Please, spare me!

[CHIN]

Woo-hoo!

[SUBARU screaming]

[KAN]

Play games with us, will you?!

Die, scum!

You like that?!

Huh?!

[GIRL]

That's enough.

[BOTH]

Huh?

And just who in the hell are you?!

[GIRL]

Stop now, and I'll forgive you.

If you would be so kind as to give back what you stole.

[TON]

You can't be serious.

[GIRL]

Please.

It's very important to me.

I'll turn the other cheek concerning the other belongings, but I can't let you have that.

So hand it over.

You mean you didn't come to save this kid?

[GIRL]

What strange clothes he has...

If you're asking me if I have any connection to him, I'd have to say no.

Well, then you've got no business with us, little girl!

If someone stole from you, it was that brat who just ran by!

Yeah, what he said!

That way!

She ran that way!

[GIRL]

Hmm...

Those three don't appear to be lying, so I need to go after her!

[BOTH sigh]

[GIRL]

But regardless of that...

...I can't overlook what's going on here.

[SUBARU]

Magic?

Mess with us, will you?

I don't care if you can use magic, I'm gonna k*ll you!

You think you can win when it's two against one?!

Do you?!

Indeed.

Two against one may be unfair.

[PUCK]

All right, then.

Two against two should even things up.

Meow.

[TON]

You use the spiritual arts?

Correct.

Retreat now, and I won't chase you.

Decide quickly.

I'm in a hurry.

[CHIN]

You bitch!

Next time I see you, I won't go easy on you!

Do anything to her, and I'll haunt you and your kin forever.

Not that you'll have any kin if I take care of things now.

[BOTH gasp]

[SUBARU sighs]

You really saved me.

Thank you.

[GIRL]

Don't move.

A-ha!

You avert your eyes due to your guilty conscience.

Looks like my judgment was spot-on, as always.

[PUCK]

You sure?

I think it was just an instinctive male reaction to avoid tension or rudeness.

I didn't sense any malice at all.

That's enough out of you, Puck.

Now, listen.

I want you to tell me who stole my insignia.

Uh, yeah, really sorry 'bout this, but I don't have the slightest clue to be honest with you.

Wait!

Oh no, it couldn't be!

Did I really make a wrong turn, or maybe come around the long way?

Heh.

If I were you, I'd hurry after her before she gets too far.

I could help, if you...

[PUCK]

Aw, you shouldn't have tried to get up.

What should we do?

It's none of our business.

He won't die or anything.

We'll just leave him as-is.

[PUCK]

Really?

Yes, really.

[PUCK]

You say that, but I bet you'll still help him.

[GIRL]

I will not!

[PUCK]

Uh-huh, yeah, right.

Absolutely not!

There's no way I'm gonna save him, understand?!

[SUBARU]

Man...

she's even super cute when she's mad.

That's another world's fantasy for you.

Whoa, hang on.

Am I on somebody's lap?

[GIRL]

You're awake?

A little weird for a cute girl to be this hairy, but whatever.

Wait!

This can't be right!

[SUBARU yelps]

We were just trying to make you happy and comfortable until you woke up.

There's no reason to get freaked out.

First of all, stop talking in that high voice.

Nobody with half a brain would confuse a cat for the main heroine!

Aww, just listen to you!

Seeing you so happy made turning myself bigger totally worth it!

I'm not happy at all!

[PUCK chuckles]

[SUBARU]

I'm sorry about this.

You stayed with me the whole time I was unconscious.

Don't get the wrong idea.

I only stuck around because there are some things I want to ask you.

I took the time and trouble to heal your wounds for you.

I also made Puck act as your pillow until you finally woke up.

This was for my own benefit.

But now that you're up, I need you to repay me in kind.

Well, for such a normal favor, you're makin' it sound like I really owe you big time.

That's not the way I see it.

Now then.

You have an idea who stole my insignia, right?

What?

Hang on, is your insignia one of those badge things that shows your social status?

A rather crude description, but that's it, more or less.

About this big with a jewel in the center.

I'm sorry, but no matter how many times you ask, I still won't know.

[ I see.

I guess there's no helping that.

But you've given me the information that you know nothing, and that answer was in exchange for healing you, so I'm still somewhat satisfied with how things turned out.

Okay?

Well, I'm in quite a hurry, so I have to go.

Your wounds should be better now, but I highly suggest that next time you don't do dangerous things like wander into deserted alleys alone.

I'm not concerned.

I'm just warning you.

If anything like that happens to you again, I already know that saving you won't be of any benefit to me, so don't expect any help.

Bye!

Sorry.

She's so insincere sometimes.

But don't think badly of her, okay?

Insincere, huh...

I think this goes beyond that.

She was in such a hurry to find what was stolen from her, yet she stopped to help me.

She even came up with that lame excuse for a favor even though I'm a total stranger.

Anyone who lives like that...

...is just gonna end up wasting their whole life!

Hey!

Wait up!

Was there something else you needed?

Just so you know, I can only spend a little more time with you, okay?

Ah, figured you were gonna shut me down...

Anyway, you lost something important, right?

Well, then let me help you find it.

You said you didn't know anything about my insignia.

But I can remember her face!

If I see her again, I'll know!

You're so strange.

Well, anyway, I won't be able to offer you any reward.

Listen, I don't need one.

I'm here because I wanna thank you.

And to show how much I appreciate your help.

I didn't do anything deserving of that.

I told you, I've already received amicable compensation for healing your wounds.

In that case...

I guess I'm gonna help you for my own sake, too.

I should probably set an objective so, uh...

Right!

One good deed per day!

Uh...

I don't sense any malice here, so I think you can just accept his offer.

After all, the more shields between you and ruffians, the better.

A shield?!

That's what you want me around for?!

I meant what I said, though.

I can't do anything to reward you.

No problem at all.

Just leave everything to me!

[SUBARU]

I know what I told you before, but isn't this town too huge to find one little thing in?

This "town" is the capital of Lugunica.

How could you possibly not know that?

Uh...

[PUCK]

Hey, that's right.

How rude of us!

We haven't asked his name yet.

Shouldn't we all introduce ourselves?

Oh, yeah, guess so.

Might as well go ahead and get the ball rolling first, then.

My name is Subaru Natsuki.

Not only am I totally clueless, I'm also broke beyond compare!

Nice to meet ya!

[PUCK]

When that's how you introduce yourself, you really do sound hopeless.

And my name is Puck!

It's nice to meet you!

It's very unusual to see someone who can touch a spirit so casually like that.

Where are you from exactly?

Well, if things follow the usual pattern, it's a small island nation to the east.

But Lugunica is the easternmost nation on our continental map.

There are no more countries in that direction.

No way, really?

There's nothing east of here?

You have no idea where you are, you have no money, you can't read, and you seem to have no one around who can help you.

You might be in an even more precarious position than I am...

Uh, Subaru, right?

[SUBARU]

Uh.

Yes, that's my name.

All that aside, I gotta admit, you seem like you're in pretty good shape.

I do try to work out every day.

Ya see, when you're the shut-in protector of your own house, you gotta stay fit as much as possible.

I'm not sure if I understand exactly what a "shut-in" is, but I assume it means you're from a reputable family, right?

[SUBARU]

Hey, what're you...?

[GIRL]

Your fingers, too.

They're very pretty.

They don't look like the working hands of a peasant at all.

And your muscles don't look like the kind you gain from doing field work.

Uh, um, yeah, so anyway, I know your cat's name now, but I still haven't heard you say your name yet.

Oh, my name?

[SUBARU chuckles]

It's...

It's Satella.

No family name.

So that's the way you may address me, all right?

I see.

Satella it is.

That's a nice name.

[gasps]

[PUCK sighs]

You have got terrible taste.

Right, time to get back to askin' around!

[SATELLA]

Subaru...

That child over there, do you get the feeling she's lost?

Maybe, but what about our questioning?

That's also important.

But if she's lost, we have to do something.

I'm in no place to talk after you saved me, but do you fully comprehend the position we're in?

I do.

But there's a little girl who's crying!

You can see that, right?

If you don't want to do this with me, that's fine.

Thanks for your assistance, Subaru.

I'm sure I can handle things on my own from here on out.

But first, I'm gonna help that little girl.

[gasps]

Hey, there.

It looks like something's the matter.

Maybe I can help you.

Did you come here on your own, or with your mommy and daddy?

Oh, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to make you cry!

I'm just here to help, not to do anything bad, I promise.

[SUBARU]

What you see before you is a rarity around here.

A jagged-edge ten-yen coin!

Observe closely as I take this coin and clutch it tightly in my hand.

Tight, tight, tight.

Like that!

Now, where'd it go?

[gasps]

[chuckles]

Well, take a look at this!

I figured out where the coin was hiding.

Here ya go, it's yours.

Like I said, it's rare, so take good care of it.

Thank you, sir!

[SUBARU]

I see.

You got separated from your mom, huh?

Yeah, that can be kinda scary.

Well, don't worry.

We'll help you.

Me and this young lady right here?

We'll find them in no time for ya.

Wow, look at us.

People who don't know us probably think they're looking at a young married couple and their kid, huh?

Is that embarrassing or what?

[SATELLA]

At best I can't really see you as anything more than her older brother.

What makes you think I'm so young, huh?!

Ah!

Mommy!

[GIRL A]

Mommy!

It looks like she finally found her.

Yeah.

I'm so relieved.

[SUBARU]

Okay...

so...

In my opinion, that whole string of events with the little girl was nothin' but a side-quest, but what benefit will you insist that you got out of it?

Go on, tell me!

That's easy.

Now we can continue our search with our minds at ease knowing we did the right thing.

Anyway, why'd you end up helping me with that?

Thought you said you were against the idea.

Could say I just wanted to show off my magic trick, but that'd be a lie.

Like I told you before, finding your insignia will be my one good deed for the day!

[SATELLA]

I know that was the plan, but since you helped the little girl, isn't your one good deed over?

You are being super nitpicky!

It doesn't hurt to do more than one nice thing in a day, does it?

I just got tomorrow's out of the way.

My plan is to get a week's worth of good deeds taken care of early!

If I were to guess, you're the type that basically wastes their whole life, right?

Seriously?

You're the last person who should be saying that to anyone.

I admit you're not a bad boy, though.

Why do you act like I'm so much younger than you?

Honestly, I'm guessing there aren't that many differences between us.

Well, you may think that, but all of your guesses would be wrong.

Because...

I'm actually half-elf.

[SUBARU]

Ah, no wonder.

It makes sense now.

From the moment I saw you...

I thought you were cute!

Elves are always beautiful, aren't they?

[SATELLA gasps]

What is it?

Didn't you hear what I just said?

Listen, I'm trying to tell you that I'm a half-elf.

Yeah, I heard you.

[PUCK yells]

What the heck did you do that for?

I just had to do something about this unbearable tingle I'm feeling!

That's the weirdest reason for punching somebody I've ever heard.

Though I'll forgive you since it was squishy.

I didn't hit you in the face out of anger or anything.

In fact, it was quite the opposite.

Subaru, you are such a dunderhead!

Yeah, so who says "dunderhead" in this day and age?

And why are you insulting me in the first place?

Ugh!

Whatever!

More importantly, we have to get back to the search.

So let's go.

Hey, wait a minute!

Just running around without a plan is never a good idea.

There's a basic rule of searches.

What are you talking about?

Yeah, like revisiting the scene of the crime.

Where exactly was your insignia stolen?

And then she told me it was right around here, so after I insisted that she leave everything to me, I valiantly came back to this fruit stand to look for some clues.

I thought I had a customer, but you're that same broke kid from earlier.

[SUBARU]

You really wanna take that attitude?

Haven't you noticed I'm not who I was before?

[KADOMON]

Huh?

Just look who I brought with me!

I bet it's someone who just might become a regular!

[SATELLA]

Uh, Subaru...

I'm not exactly sure what you expected of me, but I actually don't have any money, either.

[SUBARU]

Huh?

S-Seriously?

So what did you wanna ask me about now that I'm stuck here with not one, but two broke customers, boy?

Well, we're actually looking for someone, and we were hoping we could ask you a few questions, if you wouldn't mind...

That was a sarcastic way of saying I don't have time for broke losers!

Now get outta here!

Scram!

[GIRL A]

Hey, mister!

[ALL]

Huh?

Thanks for your help earlier.

[SUBARU]

What brings you back this way?

It's my husband's shop, so we just wanted to stop by.

[KADOMON sighs]

Your husband?

[KADOMON]

Hey, there's my girl.

Now wait a second, how exactly do you know these two good-for-nothings?

She got lost, and these two found her, then helped bring her back to me.

[SUBARU chuckles nervously]

Thanks again, lady.

Here!

She was hoping we'd find you.

Please accept that token as her way of showing gratitude for what you've done.

Thank you very much.

[KADOMON clears throat]

Sorry about all that before.

You helped my daughter, and I wanna show my appreciation, so ask me anything.

There, you see?

A little bit of extra effort on our part came back around and worked in our favor!

The air, the atmosphere, and, most likely, the attitudes of the people living here are awful.

Are you sure she's really out here?

You're sayin' she's a nimble little blonde, right?

'Cause it might be that Felt girl I see around from time to time.

She's well-known in the slums.

Dunno where she lives, though.

That's about all I can tell ya.

[SATELLA]

Maybe someone will tell us if we ask.

[PUCK]

No one would sell out their own, especially to a couple of strangers, so asking would be useless.

Maybe we should just come back later.

Whatever it is you wanna do, I suggest that you decide quickly.

'Cause I've just about run outta time here.

"Out of time"?

What do you mean?

I'm able to take on this cute appearance, but I'm a spirit.

It takes a lot of mana for me to appear in physical form.

So when the day becomes night, I return to the crystal I was summoned from and prepare for the sun to emerge.

On average, my ideal time to stay out is roughly nine to five.

Nine to five?

Sounds like you work in an office.

Employment terms for spirits are pretty severe.

We'll be fine without Puck.

We need to keep moving forward on this.

Sorry, but I'm at my limit.

Good luck, you two.

It's almost like he's dying when he disappears.

Sorry to've worked you so hard today, Puck.

We'll handle things from here, so settle in and get some rest.

Don't do anything reckless, all right?

If it comes down to it, you can always use the od to summon me again.

I'm leaving things in your hands, Subaru!

Good luck!

Hey, wow, I don't think I've been in one of these "alone with a girl" situations since I was in grade school.

Don't get any pervy ideas, Subaru.

I can use magic, you know.

I won't, okay?!

The more important issue at hand is how we find Felt now.

[SATELLA]

I'll contact the lesser spirits.

[SUBARU]

Lesser spirits?

[SATELLA]

Precisely.

They're beings that haven't quite become full-fledged spirits yet.

They grow little by little over time, and when they gain enough strength and self-awareness, they become full spirits, just like Puck.

[SUBARU]

Huh?

[SATELLA]

It's getting more desolate and quiet.

Hard to believe that she actually lives out here.

I know, but the lesser spirits specifically said they saw someone who looked like Felt headed in this direction.

'Scuse me, man!

Know if a girl named Felt lives somewhere up this way?

Huh?

You're lookin' for Felt?

There's nothing that way except Old Man Rom's loot house.

Hah, I guess she must've stolen something pretty important for you two to come out here.

Well, I wish you luck on bargaining to try to get it back.

Live strong, okay?

[SATELLA]

What was he talking about?

Why do I have to pay money to get back something stolen from me?

[SUBARU]

Don't worry about a thing.

Just leave everything to me.

I can handle the negotiations.

All right, then.

I'll just leave everything in your hands.

You agreed to that pretty easily.

I figured you'd say something like "You want me to leave this to a useless boy like you?

That's such a ridiculous idea, it actually hurts my stomach!" And although that would stomp all over my feelings, I'd still decide to keep helping you anyway.

I'd never say something that mean to anyone!

Of course, to tell you the truth, I'd be lying if I said you haven't been holding me back a little bit.

Oh, great!

That's good to know!

But again...

...I'm leaving this in your hands.

If it actually goes well, I'll consider it a bonus.

Now, ya know, if you said something more like, "Work hard for me, okay?" I'd probably feel a whole lot more motivated.

Sorry, I can't force myself to say something like that.

However, please do your best.

Yeah, you got it.

I'll go in first.

You stay outside and keep watch.

I won't be back too late, but you can have dinner without me if you get too hungry.

[SATELLA]

Don't say dumb things like that.

And be careful.

[SUBARU]

Sure, sure.

Now don't come in until I say it's all right, Satella.

What's the matter?

Nothing, never mind.

If you can manage to get my insignia back, then I'll apologize.

Anybody here?

Nope.

[SUBARU]

So am I walking into a demon nest or a snake pit?

In a fantasy world, either is totally plausible.

This is all stolen loot?

Impressive.

But why isn't anyone here?

A shack full of stolen goods and no one around to guard it?

[squelching]

[SUBARU]

Uh.

[gasps]

[VOICE]

Oh, dear, you found that?

Well, I have no choice, then.

No choice at all...

[SUBARU]

Agh...

that burns...

[SUBARU]

Oh, crap...

Is all of this my blood?

[SUBARU]

No...

This is bad...

Very bad...

[SATELLA]

Subaru?

What's wrong?

You okay...?

Don't come in!

Run away!

Get out of here!

--[thud]

--[SATELLA screams]

[SUBARU]

Stay with me...

Hang on.

No matter what happens...

...I'm gonna save you...

What's the matter with you, kid?

It looks like you've seen a ghost or somethin'.

Huh?

You were askin' about these and I told you they were appas.

So are you interested in buying some or not?

Huh?

"Huh?" Stop screwin' around!

Do you want one or not?

You even have any money?

Ohh!

No.

Like I said before, I don't have any money on me, I'm just browsing.

I figured as much; should've known better.

Go on, b*at it.

I run a business here.

I don't have time for window-shoppers, understand?

What's going on?

It was nighttime just a few minutes ago, right?

The wound on my stomach is gone.

Oh, that's right!

Satella!

Damn it.

Puck asked me to take care of her and I totally blew it!

I have to find my way back to that shop!

What's got you so spooked?

Why are you in such a hurry?

If you don't wanna get hurt, then cough up whatever you've got!

You guys again?

Tryin' to get revenge for what happened before, is that it?

Huh?

The hell are you talkin' about?

I think he must've hit his head or something.

Nah, he'll be all right.

Just give us everything you've got, understand?

Put it on the ground and we'll let you go.

Fine, whatever.

Everything I've got, right?

I'm in a hurry, so I don't even care.

Now start acting like a dog.

Just get on all fours like and howl, "Help me!" like a mongrel.

[SUBARU]

Don't get cocky, you bastards!

[SUBARU yells]

[SUBARU]

Don't ever underestimate a truant kid with too much free time.

'Cause I usually end up swinging around a wooden sword all day for no reason, which has given me a significant bump to my grip strength!

I'm in a hurry, okay?!

So don't get in my way again!

Easy now, don't freak out, don't freak out, don't freak out!

[SUBARU]

Am I stupid?

After coming this far, I can't just leave without answers!

Hello, is anyone there?

Look, I know someone's in there, all right?!

Just answer the door and show yourself!

Come on!

[ROM]

Shut your trap!

Why don't you use signal or a password instead of knockin' my damn door down?!

[ROM]

Huh?

Wait, you're...

[ROM]

What're you actin' all fidgety for?

You got a wedgie, or are your balls chafin'?

Why don't you stop worrying about the condition of my privates, okay?!

This is no time for potty humor!

You're already interruptin' my evenin' booze.

Start talking about boring stuff, and I'll pass out.

And if you drink that hard while the sun's still up, you'll die young.

By the way, ya think I could ask you a dumb question?

You didn't happen to, I dunno, die recently, did you?

[ROM]

Huh?

[ROM laughs]

Well, while I do admit to being an old man at death's door, I'm still here, alive and kickin'.

Okay, then have you seen a girl here with long, silver hair?

Silver hair?

I ain't seen nobody that fits that description.

I'd remember.

[SUBARU]

Was it all a dream, then?

If it was, how much of it?

And why am I in this world in the first place?

So what are you doin' here, anyway?

You never made that clear.

O-Oh, right.

I'm out looking for a small insignia.

It belongs to a silver-haired girl who helped me out, earlier.

Don't know why, exactly, but it's really important to her.

Let's see...

I think she said it had a jewel in the middle...

Insignia with a jewel, huh?

Sorry, but I ain't got anything that fits that description.

Are you positive?

Think long and hard about it!

Maybe you're just old and senile.

I'm at my best full of booze, so if I don't remember it now, I must not know anything about it.

But...

I've got somebody bringin' in a few goods later on.

I'm told it's a pretty fine pile of loot.

And there's a good chance that what you're lookin' for is mixed in there somewhere.

Would the one bringing it happen to be a girl named Felt?

Well, Mister Know-It-All, you even know who swiped it!

Of course, whether or not you'll be able to afford it is a different matter.

Money talks, and B.S. walks.

Well, you're outta luck!

There's no use playing these mind games and trying to size me up.

I'm about as broke as they come, buddy.

Then there ain't no use talkin' about it.

Just a second.

I told you I was broke, but what about the option of trading?

[ROM]

Hmm...

Now that you mention it, you do have a lot of unusual stuff there.

[SUBARU]

That I do!

For example, this is a corn potage snack.

You've never tasted anything like it!

[ROM]

That's food?

I see now!

Yeah!

What an odd flavor!

These things would go great with booze!

That's right!

Now you're talkin'!

Hey!

Don't just start eating them!

I dunno what you plan on tradin', but you'll have to come back after Felt gets here, okay?

This is good stuff!

I guess no matter what world you're on, there are always people with money and people without.

I will say, the difference here is pretty stark.

[FELT]

Hey, what're you doin' there?

You're in my way, ya know.

[SUBARU]

Felt!

Hang on a second, have we met before?

[SUBARU]

Not formally, no.

But I've been waiting for you!

Oh, yeah?

Why's that?

Come on, try and think about this.

Do you really not remember seeing me before?

Huh, nothin's ringing any bells.

Listen, I'm a busy woman, okay?

So if you don't leave a huge impression, there's no way I'm gonna remember you.

I'd say it was a pretty huge impression, but whatever.

Just forget about that.

I want to negotiate for the insignia you're bringin' in there.

[FELT]

Hmm...

So that's all ya wanted, huh?

In that case, I guess I'll hear you out.

[ROM]

For a rat...

Poison.

[ROM]

For a whale...

A harpoon.

[ROM]

To the noble dragon lord...

We're bags of sh*t.

I'm sorry to keep you waiting, old man.

My target was more persistent than I thought.

It took a while to shake them.

Hey, did you water down this milk or what, Old Man Rom?

'Cause there's definitely something wrong with it.

Pretty nasty stuff.

I give you somethin' outta the goodness of my heart, and you call it gross?

You two are a whole lot closer than I had either hoped or expected.

Feelin' kinda left out over here...

Come on, don't start talkin' like a wuss when you've got a face that looks almost as scary as his.

Tellin' me I look like an old man at my age is the most savage thing anyone's ever said to me.

Okay, yeah, I probably went a little too far that time.

I'm sorry, dude.

If I didn't know any better, I'd say you two were in some contest to try to piss me off.

All right, well then, what do you say we get down to business, huh?

How much are you willing to pay for it?

Wow, you don't waste any time at all.

Before I give you an answer, you do have the insignia, right?

Yeah, of course I do, silly!

Satisfied?

This one not only has a cool design, it's got that jewel in it.

So I had to work pretty hard to get a hold of it.

If you can pay enough to match all the effort involved, we'll both be happy.

I don't have any money.

Then it sounds like we don't have anything more to discuss!

[SUBARU]

Tsk, tsk, tsk.

I don't have any money, but I have a few things worth money.

What I have in my hand here is a magical device that can stop time for everyone, everywhere.

It's called a "cell phone"!

[FELT]

What's that?

[ROM]

Never seen one of those before.

Take this!

Nine sh*ts per second: Continuous sh*t!

[BOTH yelp]

Hey, what's that clicking sound?!

And that was way too bright!

Stop!

What are you tryin' to do, k*ll me?

Don't you go tryin' to trick this old man with your dodgy tricks!

[SUBARU]

Now, hold on.

Wait, is that...?

[ROM]

Those are me and Felt's faces.

What sort of magic is that?

[SUBARU]

It's like I was tellin' you, it's a mystical item that can freeze a moment in time.

With this unique device, you can capture moments in time, store them inside of it, and look at them later!

[FELT]

Oh, wow!

That's amazing!

[ROM]

Never seen the like.

Is that one of the "metia" I've been hearin' about?

What's a metia?

It's the name for devices that allow people whose gates aren't open to use magic in the very same way that real magic users do.

I'm more concerned with the price.

How much do you think I'll be able to get outta this thing, anyway?

Don't ask me.

It's my first time havin' to deal with one of these metia, too.

But I feel pretty confident that it'll fetch way more than that insignia.

Then that settles it!

This cell phone for the insignia!

Negotiations complete!

Thank you for your business.

Hey!

Uh, not so fast.

[SUBARU]

What's the problem?

You're not the only one I'm negotiating with for the insignia.

[SUBARU]

Huh?

It's not like it was just some random grab, somebody specifically asked me to get it for them.

In exchange, that same client said I could get ten holy coins.

You've already got a deal set up for it?

I have no idea what ten holy coins are worth to compare.

[ROM]

Judging by what it can do, I'd say your metia is worth at least 20 holy coins.

Actually, I'm guessin' there're people out there who'd be willin' to pay even more.

[FELT]

Really?

Then that means I can get away with overcharging for it!

So when and where are you planning on meeting this client of yours?

Hey, no need to worry.

Negotiations will take place right here.

If a little thing like me dealt with them alone, I'd be screwed if a client decided to cheat me.

But with Old Man Rom standing there, that's not a concern.

[knocking]

The password?

[FELT]

Oh, I didn't mention it to them.

That's probably for me.

I'll go check.

[SUBARU]

You're okay with letting her use you like this?

It ain't like we're total strangers, or anything.

I've known her for a long time, so I help her out whenever I can.

Even I have to smile a little when I see somebody who looks like such a barbarian standing right here in front of me.

Well, look at where we are.

Everyone around here is desperate just to survive each day.

Normally, people join forces with others to try and keep themselves safe when things get rough.

But Felt ain't cut out for that.

That's why I gotta look out for her and keep her outta trouble.

[FELT]

Yep, I was right.

It was for me.

Over here.

Care to sit down?

There seem to be several outsiders here.

[FELT]

Well, I'd be in trouble if you jipped me.

We weaklings have our own way of playing it smart.

I know this older fellow, but I'm afraid I don't recognize the young man.

He happens to be your rival.

So he'll be the other person negotiating with you today.

I see now.

Believe I understand the situation.

I'm pretty sure he's only interested in the insignia, so that means you two will be bidding against each other.

I honestly don't care who ends up with it, so I'll sell it to the highest bidder and be completely satisfied doing so.

I think I like that personality of yours.

Exactly how much did this young man bid for the item?

I'm putting up this metia.

It's pretty rare too, probably the only one of its kind in this entire world.

It can capture moments in time.

The big muscleman over here tells me it's worth no less than 20 holy coins.

A metia.

Well, luckily for me, the client sent along extra funds in case anything came up.

That way, I'd be prepared to sweeten the deal.

The client, huh?

So I suppose that means you were asked to fetch it too, then, weren't you?

Yes, that's correct.

The client is the one who wants to acquire it.

Would you happen to be in the same business?

Doubt it, unless your client is gamefully unemployed.

So this unemployed guy has named a price that puts him pretty far ahead in the lead.

And that brings us to this: What price is your master putting on it?

[ROM]

Hmm.

Twenty, exactly.

These are the holy coins my employer sent with me to seal this deal.

So do you think they should be enough?

What's wrong with you?

Don't you know how to bargain?

Stop lookin' so pathetic!

Your metia's worth no less than 20 holy coins, remember?

The way I see it, victory in this deal is definitely leaning toward the boy.

Sorry for all the trouble for you and your employer, but you'd better bag up those coins and be on your way.

[SUBARU]

Yeah!

[SUBARU]

Wh-What?

What's wrong with a little victory pose?

I'm totally psyched about this!

[FELT]

So...

no one said anything.

Go as crazy as you want.

I don't care as long as I get my profit.

[SUBARU]

Uh, sorry, Miss Elsa.

You'll probably get in trouble about this, won't you?

[ELSA]

These things can't be helped.

The way I see it, this was my employer's fault for trying to underpay.

It ended in disappointment, but at least I got to have a drink.

So I'll be taking my leave now.

[ELSA]

By the way, what do you intend to do with that insignia, anyway?

Oh, I'm gonna look for its owner, then return it to her.

[BOTH gasp]

I see.

So you're with them, then.

What's goin' on here?

Do you want to die?!

[ELSA]

Oh, my.

It seems you've dodged my strike.

[clatter]

This is my first battle to the death with a giant!

Quiet, jumpy little girl!

I'll grind you up and feed you to the rats!

Crap!

Don't worry, there's no way Old Man Rom will lose.

Take this!

Old Man Rom!

[ROM]

Damn it.

[ELSA]

I forgot to say-- I'm gonna take you with me!

Thank you for that nice glass of milk.

I suppose I should return this now.

What have you done?

How dare you put your filthy hands on him, you bitch.

Oh, my.

Seems you have more courage than your friend.

But I would advise against doing anything stupid, unless you wanna get hurt.

As if you didn't intend to k*ll me either way.

You psychopathic monster!

Wouldn't move around too much, dear.

My hands might slip.

Believe it or not, I'm not the best at handling blades.

I'm sorry you got caught up in all of this.

[SUBARU]

Wait, I-- [ELSA]

Divine protection of wind...

[yells]

How wonderful.

I can see you're loved dearly by this world.

I truly envy you.

The old man and the girl have fallen, yet you remain frozen over there on the floor.

I take it you've given up?

Dammit...

There we go, you finally stood up.

'Course, it's less fun since you took so long.

But still, not bad.

[yells]

[ELSA]

It's no use.

I see you're a novice.

You've no divine protections or techniques.

I'd hoped to squeeze wisdom out of you, but you lack that, too.

[SUBARU]

Shut up!

I do have my pride!

I can't believe you...

After you've put me through all this...

I do acknowledge that you have extraordinary determination.

If only you could've stood up and done that sooner, things might have gone a bit differently for these two.

I think it's time to end this little game.

I'll send you to meet the angels.

[ELSA]

Ah, you're full of surprises.

I certainly felt that one.

Didn't feel it?

I managed to open up that belly of yours when we passed by one another.

The one thing I excel at when using a blade.

[ELSA]

Just as I thought.

Your entrails have such an interesting shape to them, and such a lovely color, too!

[SUBARU]

It hurts...

It hurts...

It hurts...

It hurts...

[ELSA]

Does it hurt?

Are you suffering?

[SUBARU]

It...

doesn't hurt?

[ELSA]

Do you want to die?

[SUBARU]

Die?

Am I dead?

Am I still alive?

When will I die?

When will I die?

When?!

I'm scared...

I'm scared...

I'm scared!

I'm scared!

I'm scared!

I'm scared!

I'm gonna die!

I'm gonna die!

I'm gonna die!

[ELSA]

Yes, you're slowly losing body heat...

You're slowly growing cold...

[SUBARU]

Oh...

I'm dead.

[KADOMON]

What's the matter, boy?

You look like you've seen a ghost.

Say somethin'.

Are you okay?

[sighs]

I have no idea.

That woke you up.

You feelin' better?

Just forget about the money.

Here, I'll give you these.

Take 'em.

Hey.

Wait up...

Hang on!

Please, wait for me!

Wait up!

Satella!

[SUBARU]

Please don't ignore me!

My disappearing and not doing what you said were my fault!

But I was desperate!

I didn't know what else I could do!

So I went back to the loot house after that, but I still couldn't find you...

I'm sorry for only thinking of myself.

But I'm glad you're all right, Satella.

What in the world is wrong with you?

Huh?

Now, listen, I don't know who you think you are, but don't ever call me by the name of the Witch of Envy!

What were you thinking?!