12x10 - All I Want Is You

[bunniefuu]

Meredith: I am fine. I am happy to be here.

Truly, I have been through a lot, and I'm lucky to be alive, and I'm lucky to be okay, and I get that.

So, yes, I'm just happy to be here.

Great.

You know, Doctor, most surgeons, uh, get kind of rankled at hospital-mandated therapy.

Bailey's just looking out for me.

I know the drill.

So this should be quick.

You know, you chose the short straw, or the... is it the long straw?

Whatever the good straw is.

[Laughs]

[Horn blaring]

Lay off the damn horn, will ya?

[Sighs] God, carpool sucks.

Hang on. Is Wilson coming?

I think so.

What do you mean you think so?

I can't... look, she's all over the place.

I don't even know why she let me back in the house.

We barely talk, which is probably good because it's fewer chances I'll piss her off again.

That's pathetic.

What's her problem?

She's in a mood.

Still?

[Horn blares]

I said to tell her that I needed a minute.

You didn't tell me that.

Yes, I did. You didn't listen.

[Car door closes]

So done with carpool.

[Tires squeal]

[Siren wailing]

Incoming. 20 minutes, chest pains.

I'll take it. Page cardio... Anyone but Riggs.

Page Riggs.

He just said...

I can hear.

You know that Dr. Hunt punched Dr. Riggs.

The only way they're gonna learn to work together is if they work together, so any cardio consults that get paged to the pit, you page Riggs.

You know this is my one happy place right now?

Please don't make it a crappy place.

Oh, Kepner. I feel you. I do.

Page Riggs.

Hi. Maya Roberts...

Dr. Karev. I know.

Uh, this is my mom, Judi.

Thank you for making the time to see my daughter.

Have we met before?

I looked you up.

And you are?

Uh, Cross... Dr. Cross.

Go.

Right.

"Maya Roberts, 15.

Status... post below-knee amputation of the right leg two years ago after diagnosis of bone cancer, now recurring in the ribs and sternum."

I know why I'm here.

I just wanted to talk about you.

It says here in your C.V. you made buttholes for babies who didn't have them.

Hang on. That's...

Listen, I'm 15 with a chest full of cancer.

This hospital is known for making miracles happen, and I'm looking for an epic-size miracle.

According to my research, it looks like you're the guy who can make it happen.

I am confused about the buttholes.

Strange detour. So, discuss.

Or how about you humor me and let me pretend. Like I'm in charge for a sec?

Now, uh, Ms. Roberts...

What do you want to know?

Two years ago, I felt a pain in my right tibia.

She's got a real mind for this stuff.

They did labs, P.E.T. scan, the works.

Turns out I'm one in, like, a bajillion kids to get chondrosarcoma.

So chemo and radiation weren't an option.

You get points.

Sweet.

Hm.

[Sniffles] Sorry.

[Sniffles]

Hey, remember, we said no crying.

I know. Sorry. [Sniffles]

There was a one in four chance of recurrence, so it's not a huge shocker, but it is back, and it's bigger than ever in my chest.

We have our work cut out for us, gentlemen.

Uh, Robbins is going out tonight.

Do you want to maybe come over when you're done?

Yeah. No, crap. We have a "Mer" thing.

Again?

Yeah.

Come over after?

Yes.

Okay. Go. Fix your hair.

[Siren wailing]

Chest pains, huh?

Yep.

So, what's he doing here? Kepner, I told you...

I know you did, but this is what's happening.

I gave you a direct order.

Come on, Hunt. You've turned everyone here against me.

The least you can do is let me frigging work.

You have no business being here at all.

Guys, stop.

You know what? I'm sick and tired of hearing about it.

Why don't find someplace else to work?

Oh, yay! Someone's hurt. [Chuckles]

Male, 55, complaining of tightness in the chest.

Sir, do you have any pain in your left arm?

No, not really.

My chest hurts like hell, though.

Riggs, you can go.

I got this.

Chest pains. I'll take it.

Sir, what did you eat this morning?

A burrito... Two burritos.

It's probably not surgical. I'll page someone if it is.

Let's go.

How about you let me do my job?

How about you get the hell away...

How about you both shut up?

[Indistinct shouting]

Meredith: Boom. I'll be in, I'll be out.

These sessions shouldn't take all that long.

But before we start, Doctor, I was assigned your case, and if you would prefer a female therapist, I would be totally comfortable with that.

Oh, because it was a man who att*cked me?

Yeah. And it's important that you feel that you're with the right person, that you feel comfortable, that you get what you need.

I appreciate that. I'm fine.

I just need a tape-and-glue guy.

Tape and glue?

Yeah, just, you know, ask me a few questions and patch me up and send me on my way.

I've been to therapy before.

Uh-huh.

I've dealt with the big stuff.

This isn't the big stuff that we're dealing with.

Meredith...

You were att*cked in your own hospital, and you consider that small stuff?

Have you read my file?

Therapist: You're saying that you've been through a lot.

I am, and I have. My mother d*ed of Alzheimer's.

My stepmother d*ed of the hiccups.

My sister d*ed in a plane crash.

My husband was hit by a semi.

That file, it's a real page-turner.

Meredith, something terrible happened to you.

It did.

And terrible things happen every day.

Was the hell was...

April: Coming through!

Oh, my god.

Shepherd, with me... Trauma 2.

Take him into trauma 3.

Tell any incoming to go somewhere else.

Keep everyone out of the ambulance bay.

I need a trauma panel, lap pads, and a surgical tray.

Someone notify the O.R.

woman: Right away, Doctor.

[Indistinct conversations]

Hold on. You're next.

I should've gone somewhere else.

What the hell was that?

Ambulance exploded.

What?

Partial thickness burns to the upper chest.

Follow the light with your eyes.

[Breathing shakily]

Okay, good.

What happened?

Your rig exploded, but don't worry.

We've got you, okay? You're gonna be okay.

Oh, Shepherd, they need you in trauma 1.

Mm-hmm.

They figure out why that rig blew up?

Uh, fire department's looking at it now.

Oh, my god. It was me.

[Voice breaking] I didn't secure the oxygen t*nk.

Johnny's always saying...

He's gonna k*ll me.

It was an accident, and he knows that.

He's gonna k*ll me.

[Breathing shakily]

Don't arch your neck. All right.

[Monitor beeping rapidly]

There's a lot venous blood in the upper chest.

The lac extends deep into the liver.

Let me get in there, establish vascular control.

No, we're gonna pack him and take him up.

And then we'll be able to see what the hell's going on.

He's open right now. Just let me work.

He is hemorrhaging like crazy.

I'm not gonna let him bleed out down here.

Suction. More laps.

He's got a depressed skull fracture. He needs a C.T.

Look, Owen, you know I can do this. Let me stabilize him.

Riggs, this is the plan. Get on board, or get out.

Your plan is working great.

Better still, just get out.

Kepner, over here.

To hell with this!

When you first woke up after the att*ck, what is the first thing you remember?

People.

People running around everywhere.

Who specifically?

[Monitor beeping rapidly]

It was pretty crazy.

Oh. Thank you.

Uh, you, sir, have indigestion.

DeLuca here will get you an antacid.

[Cellphone chiming]

So... sorry, sir. [Clears throat]

And, uh, also schedule an upper endoscopy, please.

[Chiming continues]

DeLuca, do you have somewhere to be?

No.

Then put the damn phone away.

[Chiming continues]

Okay, he'll, uh, get you the rest of your meds, and you just, uh, sit tight, okay?

[Chiming continues]

DeLuca!

Torres is on her way.

Oh, okay. Thanks.

Hey, uh, listen, do you think tonight maybe you and I could just... I don't know.

Oh, actually, I'm having some people over tonight.

It's... it's nothing big, just Steph, Blake, and Warren.

Okay, yeah. I mean, I get off late, but I can pick up something on the way home.

No, I meant, uh, I'd kind of just like to spend some time with my friends.

Oh.

Yeah, no.

I got something later anyway, so...

Oh, great, so you have someplace to be.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got someplace to be.

[Clears throat]

Finally.

Uh, can you, uh, look at these?

Mm-hmm.

So, how old is this patient?

[Sighs] 15 going on 35.

Standard titanium plates, right?

Unless her parents will go for a stem-cell scaffolding in the chest.

Well, it's, uh, just the mom and, look, I-I don't want to leave this girl with an unprotected heart for years.

I need to make a recommendation.

Well, we could look into new technology.

No, I want the safest option.

Then you go with plates.

Tried and true.

[Cellphone clicking]

So? Hit me.

Well, I, uh, consulted with our ortho and cardio chiefs, and, uh, the best solution is a titanium-plate sternum and ribcage.

Okay. That's...

That sounds good.

How many revision surgeries?

Probably... Once a year until you reach full growth.

And if I get hit with, say, even a Nerf ball to the chest?

We'll... we'll just be very careful, won't we?

Just answer my question.

It's very dangerous, yes.

So we're talking multiple surgeries?

You're just gonna open and reopen my chest?

Um, I'm sorry.

Can you explain what she mea...

A zipper scar.

Oh.

Oh, h-honey, I...

We'll need to go in a few times, but I assure you. It's the safest, best option.

I figured out how to do it all on a leg and a half, and now you want to limit everything I do for my entire childhood?

This is how you get. The rest of your childhood.

I'm trying to save your life, Maya.

Sweetheart, we should consider this.

Maybe... I went to three different hospitals before I came here, and they all said the same thing.

They said, "go to Grey-Sloan. Do to Dr. Karev."

So now I'm here, and this is all I get... just this?

I'm disappointed in you.

Dr. Karev, you're off my case.

I'm sorry?

You're fired.

Meredith: A terrible thing happened.

I did get knocked around.

But nobody d*ed.

And any day where nobody dies, that's a good day.

So, when you were laid up, healing, who visited you the most?

Alex.

Remind me... Alex is...

Alex is the one who proposed to his girlfriend.

Right. And she said no.

Well, see, she didn't really say no, and she didn't say yes, and then she booted him, and then he came back to live with me.

Alex was there when you woke up.

I delivered him on a silver platter to her.

And he still managed to screw it up. Ugh.

You said he moved back in with her.

I mean to the place.

They're together, but they're not together, but they could be together.

It's... They're stupid.

[Chuckles]

You have feelings for Alex? Are you in love with Alex?

[Laughing] Do I have feelings for Alex?

[Chuckles] That's funny.

[Laughs] No.

[Chuckles] I'm sorry.

I'm just trying to understand why we're talking about them.

Because he's being stupid.

Uh, can she actually fire us? She's a kid.

Oh, shut up.

She's older than you are, and she's smarter.

She'll cool off. She'll come around.

Go check my post-ops.

Well, I've never been fired before.

Does this go on my permanent record?!

God.

You... you have to stop paging me, okay?

I'm getting in trouble now.

I was trying to find out if you were...

"You okay? Are you okay? Are you okay?"

Yes, I'm okay. Why wouldn't I be okay?

I thought you got blown up by an ambulance.

What? I wasn't even...

You were worried about me.

Aww.

[Cellphone chiming]

Oh. Crap.

A consult.

Mnh-mnh.

Mm, okay.

Now you're getting me in trouble.

[Sighs]

[Sighs]

Mm.

[Chuckles softly]

[Door opens]

I mean, who cares if DeLuca is an intern?

It's all sexy and secret at first, and then it's just a pain in the ass.

So they should just bring it out in the open.

That's what Derek and I did, and we have three beautiful children.

Uh, is Maggie the one in AA?

Or is she the hoverer?

The hoverer. That's the other thing.

If she was getting it regular, maybe she would stop hovering all the time.

[Indistinct talking on P.A. system]

Oh! Sorry.

Hey.

Um... How are you?

Are you... Are you good?

Did you hear about the ambulance?

Oh, yeah, I know.

That's so crazy, right?

Well, I mean, fire, O2 tanks, poor maintenance, cigarettes.

I'm sorry.

Uh, uh, reasons.

Ambulances explode.

It happens all the time, actually, which is weird, considering that their job is to not k*ll people but...

[Chuckles softly]

It happens just like [Imitates expl*si*n]

Yeah, so, um...

Are you good?

I'm okay.

Uh, I should...

I didn't screw them up. I was nice.

Penny k*lled my husband.

I took her in, I'm teaching her.

I am trying to make something good out of it.

That was very cool of me. I didn't have to do that.

No, you didn't, but why did you?

And now Callie thinks I'm coming between them, and Blake thinks so, too. I can feel it.

And it's just not true.

I did not come between their great love... wasn't me.

I'm sorry. Who's Callie again?

Callie is my friend in ortho.

Ah.

Come on. Keep up.

[Monitor beeping]

ICP is normalizing.

This drain is doing the trick.

We'll observe him tonight, and I'll take him up to the O.R. tomorrow and repair the liver lac.

Kepner, you free? Uh, yeah. Just let me know.

Great. I'll go scrub in and remove the drain at the same time.

Mm-hmm.

So, you still living with Richard?

I'm crashing here. It's a better commute.

[Chuckles]

Amelia...

You know you can stay with me.

It's not a good idea for my sobriety.

Right.

I'm gonna need dinner, though.

Great.

Dinner tonight?

Okay.

So, Hunt and I will do the liver lac tomorrow.

How is the, uh, partner?

Stable. Worried about his friend.

You should have cardio there, too, so bring in Riggs just to be safe.

[Sighs] Come on.

I'm sorry?

You know there was an expl*si*n in the E.R. this morning.

I just really don't want to see another one over an open patient.

You make a good point.

[Sighs]

Wait... so it all comes out in one piece?

Exactly.

That's so freaking cool.

[Laughter]

What's going on?

Oh, um, Dr. Karev, uh, these two are gonna make me those.

Pierce and I had an idea.

'Cause they're geniuses.

Well, she kind of is, too.

It does sound pretty amazing.

You just took over my case?

She paged us for a consult.

Yeah, no offense, but you're not my Doctor anymore.

But I think when you see this, you're gonna want in.

Can you show him this?

Yeah, hit it.

Callie: Okay, so, I can excise Maya's tumors, but instead of the traditional titanium reconstruction, I can 3-D print a new sternum and ribs.

They'll be molded to her exact body specifications so she can move around more naturally.

Have you ever done this?

It's only been done once before on an adult, but I can modify it for a child.

Yeah, I'll be the first.

I'll look like the Terminator, which is badass.

[Laughter]

Can I see you two outside?

You said yourself titanium plates are the best option.

That was before I knew that Callie could print her her own ribcage.

It will be fewer surgeries in the long run.

You're not experimenting on some kid.

She may think she knows what she wants, but she's not old enough to understand the risks.

She gets it. Trust me.

I know a little something about being labeled too smart for your age.

I love her.

I'm not signing off on this.

You're not on the case anymore, and her mom has the consent forms.

Oh, you know as well as I do she's freaking useless.

I mean, you can't even... Karev, Karev.

[Sighs]

Ms. Roberts, please.

This is a-a dangerous experimental procedure with zero proof that it'll work, let alone keep your kid alive.

Trust me when I tell you you don't want to do this.

Please, mom.

It's what she wants.

♪

You swiped her.

We didn't swipe her.

She fired you and asked us.

No one's looking out for this kid...

Not her mom, not... not anyone.

Um, we are, Alex.

And I wouldn't have even suggested it if I didn't believe that it was the best thing for her.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.No arguing.

Fun. Remember? Fun?

For Meredith, for support.

I postponed sex for this.

Therapist: Maggie's a hoverer.

God, she hovers all the time.

Does it bother you, the hovering?

No, she's just being sisterly or whatever.

Why would you say that?

So, how long is this going to last?

Come on. It's fun.

I want to go to bed.

Oh, I do, too, and I can't go home.

I don't want to go home... Alone.

[Sighs] I miss Penny.

I miss having sex.

Ugh. Penny and I had the greatest sex.

[Chuckling] It was that "journey of discovery" great sex you have in the beginning.

Jo and I had sex like that all the time.

And now no Penny, no sex.

No sex with Penny. None of it.

Okay, let's not talk about sex, because the chief is here.

Bailey: I'm just eating my pizza.

Besides, it sounds like none of y'all are getting any anyway.

Pierce is getting some.

No, I'm not. Don't say that. Forget he said that.

So annoying.

She has people over all the time, like if I'm alone, I'll explode or something.

They won't go away.

Okay, but, guys, really, you can go.

No, we're here because it's fun.

No, really, it's okay. I can...

Are you sure? 'Cause you seem a little...

Cranky as hell? Which is totally understandable with everything you've gone through.

Of course you would be.

Callie: And we're worried.

You don't have to worry.

We know.

And I'm not cranky.

I know.

Except you are all the time.

[Sighs]

Therapist: Do you want to be alone?

Well, I'm a widow.

I'm good at it.

I really just want...

What?

Well, then, tell them to go away.

Well, no, because they're just trying to help.

What do you want?

What can we do?

Therapist: But they're not being helpful.

And it's all right for you to tell them that.

Leave my house.

Get out.

I mean, thank you, but, really, just go be with whoever somewhere else so that I can go to sleep.

Leave.

You seem angry.

I'm not.

My bad.

I took your advice.

I kicked them all out of my house last night.

And...

It worked. They left me alone.

Well, that's what you wanted.

I know.

[Doorbell rings]

Hey. Dr. Webber.

Arizona's just gonna be a second, so...

Oh, thanks.

Hey, let's get a move on!

Trivia's starting in 15 minutes!

Arizona: Coming!

Yeah. [Chuckles]

Hey. Looking sharp.

Got a hot date?

Uh, yeah, something like that.

Hmm.

She's, uh... We're kind of keeping it quiet.

Oh. Secret romance?

I'm guessing she works at the hospital?

I mean, she...

[Chuckling] Relax, son.

[Chuckling] Okay.

I get it.

You know, it's been a few years, but if yours is anything like mine was, keeping it a secret makes it just that much more exciting.

You know, you're totally right.

I mean, she... She keeps it so together in front of people at work, but then, when we're alone, she's so... She's a wildcat, huh?

[Both laugh]

How... Do I look?

Do I look hot?

[Stammers] You're very hot.

Can we go now? [Laughs]

Thank you. Whew!

Okay. See you later.

You have fun, too. Have fun tonight, DeLuca.

Thanks.

Oh, and, uh... You can't tame a wildcat.

[Car alarm chirps]

It's infuriating because I know that our problems haven't just magically disappeared.

Thanks.

Mm-hmm.

Hey, uh, when are the rest of the guys coming?

This is it.

All right. [Both laugh]

Penny: Why did you let him move in?

Because he showed up on my door all sad with his big, sweet face and made me forget everything that was wrong with us.

I know.

I see Callie walking down the hall, she and I are barely talking, and I still get stupid.

Ugh.

I want to get stupid over somebody.

All I ever feel is smart.

I just want to take his dumb, gorgeous face, and I just... I want to... I want to pummel it...

And kiss it and marry it and just pummel it.

Penny: I get that, too. Mm.

Not the pummeling, but the kissing.

Mm.

I thought you didn't even want to marry him?

I don't know what I want. I can't be trusted.

I want to know what guys want.

Hey, Warren, Warren.

You're a guy. What do you want?

Um... You know, that's, uh... That's... that's tough. Um...

Did anybody see that an ambulance blew up in the E.R. today?

No, we're serious. What do guys want?

[Sighs] What do guys want?

[Clears throat] Out of this conversation.

[Laughter]

[Cellphone chiming]

Oh, um...

I just got an important text, and I have to go.

You are impossible.

Oh, women are just as impossible.

Really?

Look, I, uh... I can't speak for all men.

I'm just a guy who wants to go home to his wife.

Sorry. Good night.

[Chuckles]

[Door opens, closes]

Screw Bailey.

[Both laugh]

Aw.

She got the good one.

She did.

Mm.

[Gasps] Ho ho!

Looks like you owe me another beer.

[Clicks tongue]

Oh, hell.

Hey, no one forced you to take bets you couldn't win.

What is the deal, Nathan?

No deal.

Go again?

I talked about Owen dozens of times when we were over there, and you never even mentioned knowing him.

Well, I didn't want to talk about it.

So, what, you guys have just, like, always hated each other?

No, I never hated him.

We became Doctors together, went through school, field training.

There was no one I trusted more. We were like brothers.

What happened?

You're up.

Okay, so we're not talking about this?

We're playing darts.

How'd you get so good at darts anyway?

You pick up some things when you have no reason to go home.

So, what are you gonna do?

You gonna sign the papers?

We're playing darts.

Fine with me.

Hey, you ready? I'm starving.

Listen, can we do this another night?

[Sighs]

Uh, okay.

I'm not hungry, and I-I don't want to...

What's wrong?

Nothing, nothing.

Just be better another night, okay?

Is this about Riggs?

Can you...

I'm not getting into it.

Everything doesn't need to be talked about.

Okay.

Yeah, I understand.

So another time you will call me, and we'll go out.

But you won't, will you?

Or you will and I will cave and go and I will talk too much and you will say nothing.

And I-I'm... I don't know how to do this thing that you do where you make me feel like crap and there are no words coming out of your mouth.

So... Whatever.

You'll call me maybe... Or maybe not.

And maybe I will not care.

I had a sister.

Megan.

She was three years younger than me.

Smarter than me, funnier than me...

Better person than me, okay?

But she did everything I did.

We went to med school together, and that's where we met Riggs.

Nate was my best friend.

And Megan loved him.

And he was with her the day that we lost her.

I trusted him with her, and he was like a brother to me.

And he should've...

But he didn't.

And I don't talk about it.

[Sleeping At Last's "Daughter" plays]

Okay.

[Sighs]

♪ If only you knew the sunlight shines a little brighter ♪

Can I say one thing?

She loved him.

There's a reason. She loved him for a reason.

That's what I hold on to. Derek loved her.

Your sister loved Riggs.

So there's good in there.

That makes him family.

And that means that maybe he deserves another chance.

♪ Speak your mind a little louder ♪
♪ 'cause you are royalty Are you still hungry?

[Chuckles softly]

What are we eating?

I could go for a pizza.

♪ This is your story me, too.

♪ And this is your moment, don't look down ♪

What are you doing here?

Hanging.

I kicked you off my case.

I know. I'm not gonna operate on you.

Then what are you doing here?

I'm holding your hand.

Figured you'd want someone to hold your hand.

I mean, if you have nothing better to do.

♪ Our ceiling is your floor ♪
♪ and all you gotta do ♪
♪ is put one foot in front of you ♪
♪ if only you knew ♪
♪ if only you knew ♪

Okay, Maya. We're ready to roll.

[Voice breaking] Dr. Karev.

[Breathing shakily]

All right, everybody, clear the room.

Give her a minute.

Okay.

♪ Open your eyes a little wider ♪
♪ speak your mind a little louder ♪

You want me to get your mom?

[Sniffles] No, no.

[Chuckles] She'll just freak out.

She was practically my age when she had me.

And she works two jobs to cover my bills and the good insurance.

She tries.

If something happens to me, will you tell her that there's an envelope under my bed with bank statements and the deed to our house?

Just don't forget, okay?

Hey, none of that.

♪ Is put one foot in front of you ♪

Oh, god, I don't want to die.

You're not gonna die.

[Sniffles]

We both know you can't promise anything.

♪ And all you gotta do ♪
♪ is put one foot in front of you ♪
♪ if only you knew ♪

[breathes deeply]

You good?

♪ If only you knew ♪

Yeah.

Let's do this.

Um, do me a favor, though.

If you're not too busy making some kid a butthole, can you keep my mom company?

Okay. Thank you.

♪ This is your kingdom, this is your crown ♪
♪ this is your story ♪
♪ this is your moment, don't look down ♪

Therapist: You said. you were good at being alone.

Will you stop saying what I said?

Okay.

So, why are you so angry?

I'm not.

[Chuckles]

Okay.

So, how was it?

It was fine.

I checked on the kids, I read a book, I went to sleep.

It was good advice.

I got what I needed.

I... it was...

What?

Mm.

[Indistinct shouting]

[Dramatic music plays]

They left me alone.

You said the first thing you remember after the att*ck was...

Pain.

Everything hurt.

No, actually, you said it was people.

Everyone was there, you said.

Yeah. Every time I opened my eyes, it was like the freaking "Wizard of Oz."

Everyone as there.

Maggie was there. Richard was there.

They were there to help.

I mean, they were doing their jobs.

Just being good Doctors?

Yeah. Doing their jobs.

Looking good. Drain is out.

So am I.

All right. wound vac is out.

Let's remove the liver packing.

[Alarms beeping]

Damn it. Damn it. Blood's not clotting.

[Sighs] Laps. Clamp.

Clamp what? I can't see a thing.

There. Right there.

W-where are you going?

Clamp what? There's too much blood.

That. That. Right there. Clamp there.

Okay. All right. All right. Okay.

I got the IVC, but he's still bleeding.

There's too much damage.

More laps.

Keep packing. Faster, faster.

Why? I'm trying.

I'm gonna have to open him up.

Scissors.

W-w-why?

Betadine.

W-why?

He needs a venovenous bypass.

Have you ever done that before?

In the field.

Come on. There's no time.

Well, okay, then we're gonna need another set of hands.

Someone page Pierce.

No. Riggs. Get Riggs.

Are you sure you want to...

Somebody get Riggs!

Woman: Right away.

Scalpel. Thank you.

[Monitor beeping]

Right template.

Okay. Bone saw.

[Saw whirring]

Okay. Hang more FFP and platelets.

We'll keep compressions.

Got it. I got it.

There's damage to the retrohepatic IVC.

The liver is just...

Nathan: Yeah, I got it.

All right. You want to do an end around the liver?

That is what I was thinking.

Okay, set up the biopump.

We're gonna need venous cannulas.

On it.

You got the portal?

Yep.

I got the SVC.

Here.

Cheers.

Hunt called for him?

Yeah, this could get ugly.

If you want, I can...

Clamps.

Forceps.

Okay. I'm gonna need...

Metz.

Potts.

Mm-hmm.

We're gonna need to do a...

Purse string after bypass.

Mm-hmm.

I can help you guys if you need it.

Okay, here, you can hold the cannulas.

Okay.

And... Set here.

Go.

Lines up.

Clamping.

Mm-hmm.

Ooh. There you go.

All right.

Good.

Okay.

Good.

Set.

And...

Both: Three, two, one.

Both: Flow.

Not bad.

Both: 3/0 Prolene.

Meredith, how did it feel for you?

You know, stuck there, can't move, can't hear, can't speak, just watching everyone?

Crappy.

You use that word a lot.

Can you try a different one?

I don't know. Open. Exposed. Alone.

Yeah, but you weren't alone.

They were all there.

They all had you.

So, I ask once again... how did it feel for you?

Yeah.

Crappy really is the best word.

Jo: Wow.

[Chuckles]

Thank you.

Okay.

[Sighs]

Oh, sh**t.

Ugh. sh**t. Damn it!

What?

What's going on?

It's not fitting.

How is that possible? It's custom-made for her.

No, it's... The ribs are fine.

It's like a fitted sheet on a bed.

Once you attach one side... The other side pops out.

Yeah, and another set's gonna take 14 hours to print.

Can we leave her open for that long?

N-no. No.

It will leave her at risk for post-opt infection, clots.

[Sighs] So, now what?

Uh...

They want to retract her rib cage, pull it open to make enough space for the new ribs to fit.

No.

I mean, they could slip and puncture her lung and her heart.

We know. Or cr*ck her ribs.

And if she's under too long, they'll never get her off the vent.

Alex, either this or we go back to the plates.

Which is exactly what she doesn't want.

That's why they wanted to check before they went ahead.

I don't want to wake her up and ask her.

She signed a consent.

We don't need her permission.

They wanted to check with you.

My mom was just like her.

I had to take care of everything.

Makes a girl glad she was left in a stroller at a fire station.

[Laughs]

Made you tough.

Mm.

Maya's tough.

She can do it.

Okay. On my count. One, two, three.

[Grunting]

Careful not to compress her heart.

I'm trying.

Wilson, I know that you can pull harder than that.

Okay. Again. One, two, three.

[Grunting] Okay. Come on.

[Monitors beeping]

Oh, crap. She's been under too long.

She's fluid overloaded.

Her heart's beginning to fail.

[Grunts]

And done here.

Good? Kepner, would you finish up closing?

Uh, yeah. Yeah, of course.

Uh... That was...

Insane. Have you ever seen anything like that?

It's like they formed one super surgeon.

That was a thing of beauty.

It was like watching ballet.

Uh, Kepner, I think you owe me an apology.

[Muffled] Just because we saved a patient doesn't mean things are back...

Do I, though?

You didn't screw this up because I was there.

If I wasn't there, that's when...

Nathan: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop.

Yeah, okay.

[Indistinct shouting]

All I know is when they're all at my house, I want them gone.

And then, when they leave, I don't feel any better.

So, what, does that make me crazy?

I was gonna say it makes you human.

[Both chuckle]

I am very good at being alone.

I've taught myself how to do it.

And I don't mean my kids. I love my kids.

And I have my class and my work.

I have moved on.

You see, but, uh, a widow really hasn't moved on.

She's still sort of married.

She's just married to a dead guy.

You're not married anymore.

And you're not a widow anymore.

So, what are you?

I don't know.

Okay, so, what happens now?

I don't know.

That's up to you.

[Crying]

She did great.

They were able to do exactly what she wanted.

You can go in.

She just looks so...

[Crying]

Well, why don't you go get some coffee and meet us back here when you've had some time, okay?

[Sniffles]

Come on.

Surgical incision looks good.

I put her on a lasix drip, and I'll be back in an hour to check her I's and O's.

Thanks.

Okay.

Your mom will be back soon.

Check this out, iron man.

You were a badass today.

We can keep going.

Or...

I feel good.

You feel good?

I don't.

I mean, I feel comfortable signing the papers for Dr. Bailey.

You show no signs of PTSD.

And you're certainly capable of taking care of your patients...

And yourself.

But I feel terrible.

I came in here, and I felt great.

And now I don't know who I am or what I want.

Well, you wanted a tape-and-glue guy.

And I think you're holding up pretty well.

[Elevator bell dings]

Richard.

Pierce. DeLuca.

Good night.

Sir.

'Night.

[Clears throat]

[Sighs]

♪ Na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na, na, na ♪
♪ na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na, na, na ♪
♪ na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na, na, na ♪

You're really bad at this.

You should have gotten a woman.

What do I do now?

I don't know.

♪ Mama'll be back in a minute ♪
♪ got to hustle and handle our business ♪
♪ I'll be right back when I'm done ♪
♪ I gotta run, run, run, run, baby ♪

I miss you.

♪ Mama's good and you know mama's able ♪
♪ na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na, na, na ♪
♪ I've gotta run, run, run, run ♪
♪ I'm superwoman, flyin' through the city ♪
♪ there's only one way to make... ♪

Meredith, you got really good at being alone.

But something terrible happened to you, and they were all there.

And they still are.

♪ 'Cause it looks like you could be the one ♪

Are you saying...

I can't be alone anymore?

No, I think you can.

I just don't think you want to be.

♪ I'll be right back when I'm done ♪
♪ I gotta run, run, run, run ♪

Can we go?

No, he's... He's coming.

He's coming.

What do you have to do?

Oh, you have someone to do.

[Chuckles] We are not talking about that.

[Chuckles]

Are you okay?

Finally.

What?

Oh, come on.

It's been a long day. Can we just...

Therapist: You told me that any day someone doesn't die is a good day.

You are alive.

So... Have a good day.

Maggie: What are we doing? Do you want to hang out?

But what the hell do I do now?

Well... The truth is a little scary.

The truth is... You can do anything you want.

What do you want to do?

♪ I gotta run, run, run, run, run ♪
♪ run, run, run, run, run, run, run, baby ♪