06x07 - Ego Tripping at the Gates of Hell

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Dawson's Creek". Aired: January 1998 to May 2003.*
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Four friends in a small coastal town help each other cope with adolescence.
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06x07 - Ego Tripping at the Gates of Hell

Post by destinyros2005 »

Episode 607 - Ego Tripping at the Gates of Hell

In this episode: Audrey gets drunk before her band performs and worries her friends, especially CJ who suspects a deeper problem. Meanwhile, Eddie and Joey agree to go on a real date; Pacey hits it off with a beautiful woman while on a business trip to New Orleans, and is shocked to discover that she's a call girl; and when Professor Freeman announces that he's leaving he and Jack have a heart-to-heart talk about their future.

Original Airdate: November 6, 2002

[Scene: Hells Kitchen. Eddie is sitting at the bar reading a book, when Joey comes walking up carrying her bag and grabbing her coat. She begins tallying up her receipts for the day.. It is in the middle of the day and the bar is not very busy.]

Eddie: Hey. You outta here?

Joey: Yeah. I got some stuff to do on campus.

Eddie: 3:00? Yeah, I know when Heston's class is, Joe.

Joey: I know. I just didn't want you to feel weird or something. You know, it's no fun without you. No one to contest my opinions with snarky feedback. I'm starting to feel smart or something.

Eddie: Yeah, well, finals should nip that pesky ego in the butt.

Joey: I can't believe this semester is almost over.

Eddie: I know.

Joey: Are you going home for the holidays?

Eddie: What could be homier than this clean, well-lighted place?

Joey: Seriously. Where are you from?

Eddie: Does it make a difference? Where are you from?

Joey: Capeside.

Eddie: [Chuckles]

Joey: What?

Eddie: Nothing. It's just... Capeside. I guess that's about right.

Joey: About right for what?

Eddie: Hey, relax. Nothing to be ashamed of.

Joey: Have you ever even been to Capeside?

Eddie: They don't let my kind go that far east.

Joey: Well, thank goodness we have neutral ground to spar on.

Eddie: Yeah. Yeah. We're a regular Sam and Diane—me with my rugged charms, you with your fancy book learning.

Joey: You know, you've got it all wrong about me, Eddie Doling. I'm a girl from the wrong side of the tracks. You don't wanna mess with the likes of me.

Eddie: I don't know. I kinda like it when you get all "foxfire" on me. Nothin' like a fancy girl slummin' it.

Joey: You know what? You're very lucky I have class right now, because tonight, we rumble.

Eddie: I will be here. I'm workin' a double today, and don't you have anything better to do on your night off than loll around your place of work?

Joey: You know, it just so happens that Hell's Belles is going to thoroughly rock the house down.

Eddie: Mmm.

Joey: Kinda like the onion rings.

Eddie: I'll see you later, joey.

[She leaves for class]

[Open Credits]

[Commercial Break]

[Scene: Professor Freeman's Class. Jen and Jack are just arriving to class and are making their way to get their normal seats.]

Jen: So what is going on with you and this David fellow?

Jack: Keep to your own furtive gropings, thank you very much.

Jen: Oh, Jack.

Jack: No, it wasn't like that. I mean, there was-- there was coffee, there was talking, and I don't wanna jinx it.

Jen: Aw, why so shy? Come on, somebody's gotta be getting some. God. Cracking this C.J. Case is proving far too difficult for the delicate likes of me.

Jack: Easy, easy. Your sexual frustration's hitting a vein. Anyway, we're meeting in the cafeteria after class.

Jen: Can I come? C.J. Will probably be there.

Jack: Jen, don't you think you've given this one the old college try? This much effort's beneath you. You said so yourself, didn't you?

Jen: Oh, you can't hold the ultimatums of party Jen against me. I was wearing a wig. I was feeling crazy.

Jack: All right. Hey, I tell you what. Bring grams, too.

Jen: Maybe I will.

[Professor Freeman comes into class, and makes an announcement]

Freeman: Afternoon, everyone. I wanted to start class today by telling you all that you won't be seeing me after finals. The publication of my critical essays has secured my academic visitation in Chicago. So I'll be leaving Boston Bay at the end of the semester. Since our time is limited, I wanted to invite all of you to the book-signing tonight over at Winthrop hall. You've been a great class, one of my favorites.

Jen: Did you know about this?

Jack: No. I had no idea.

[Scene: Joey and Audrey's dorm room. Audrey has laid out most of her clothes on her bed, and is trying to put together an outfit.]

Audrey: Aah. [Sighs]

[Joey comes in after class]

Joey: Ok, ok. You decided to bless the orphans of the world your Betsy Johnsons?

Audrey: Hardly. I am auditioning outfits, and everything is failing miserably. Where have all my sex clothes gone? Pacey Witter has pillaged my fashion sense.

Joey: You mean there are clothes out there that actually show off your chest even more?

Audrey: Yes. And quite frankly, the girls are feeling shunned. The band is playing tonight at your little dive bar, and I want them to be resplendent.

Joey: I know. I wouldn't miss it for the world. In fact, I'm not even working tonight. So you will have my full and undivided attention.

Audrey: Ooh, well, might be nice if you showed your face around these parts. I know I'm usually low maintenance and all.

Joey: I wouldn't go that far. Besides, I figure that you and Pacey would appreciate the private time.

Audrey: Yeah, well. That was a great help. Now I've dumped Pacey 4 months too late and not a slutty frock has survived. Not a one, I tell you.

Joey: What? When did you dump Pacey?

Audrey: Hello? Mid-mid-life crisis, thanks for watching. Jeez, Joey, would it k*ll you to keep up?

Joey: Look, Audrey, I'm sorry. I've been-- wait, when did this happen?

Audrey: The horror that was Halloween. Whatever. I don't want to talk about it.

Joey: Audrey, how could you not tell me about this? Look, I know I've been gone a lot, but a little bathroom sidebar might have been in order.

Audrey: I don't know. I guess I just figured that you'd hear it from Pacey in some "how has life been since you?" Conversation.

Joey: Of course not. We live together. I mean, just because I've been running around doesn't mean I don't have time for you.

Audrey: Yeah, well, listen, it would have been great to hear your ex-girlfriend wisdom at the time, but now, I'm kinda done reliving it. Ok.

[Scene: The cafeteria. Jen and Jack go walking over to join a table with David who is waiting for them.]

Jen: Jack, have you ever noticed how much your apartment looks like the one on my two dads? I think it's the spiral staircase.

David: Well, I don't know if you and Pacey are embroiled in some whose sperm is whose battle, but would you maybe want to go out tonight, jack?

Jen: I cannot believe that you just did that.

David: What?

Jen: No hedging, no subtext. No horrible puns. Gays have it so easy. Straight boys are never so... straight.

Jack: Love to.

David: Cool.

Jen: Oh, you know what? Emma and Audrey are playing tonight.

Jack: Yeah, that's right. That's right. We should go to that. Is that ok? And then afterwards, we'll do something else?

David: Yeah.

Jen: Ok, wait, wait. Go with me here for a second, um, before C.J. Gets here. So we're gonna go see the pretty girls play. We can ask C.J. To join us on this-- this very innocent group outing.

Jack: Or, you know, why bother with the subtleties? We can just, uh, club him over the head and drag him out.

Jen: Jack, work with me here.

David: No, no, no. We should definitely ask him to come. It'd be fun if we all went. It's just, uh... well, C.J. Doesn't really date.

Jen: What? Does he just jump straight into the sack? Coffee to condoms? What are we talking here?

David: Um, no. You see, I mean, he doesn't date at all. Well, his life is sort of complicated. He, um... nah, I shouldn't really talk about it.

Jen: Whatever it is, I'm sure it's not that bad. Come on, bring it on.

Jack: Please? Jen, will you stop using my friend as your deep throat, please? Uh, yeah. F-f-forget I said that one. [Clears throat] Here comes C.J.

Jen: Oh, hey.

C.J.: Hey.

Jen: Um, look, this is totally last minute, but I don't suppose that you'd wanna come with us tonight and see our friend play in a band?

Jack: It's Audrey. You know Audrey. The one that's guaranteed to entertain.

C.J.: I recall. Yeah, sounds like fun.

Jen: Excellent.

[Jen notices Freeman walking their way]

Jen: Jack. Um, soon-to-be-extinct freeman approaches and kinda looks like he needs to pee.

David: I think maybe he just wants to talk to you.

Jack: Yeah. Uh, excuse me, guys. I'm sorry. I'll be right back.

Jen: Wanna sit?

C.J.: Yep.

[Jack goes over to talk with Freeman, and they go outside to talk.]

Freeman: I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt you and your friends.

Jack: That's all right. That's all right. I, uh-- plenty of time to eat. So class today, how about that?

Freeman: Um, jack... I keep thinking about that first conversation we had, when you said that this was the first time you'd felt motivated in a long while. I'd hate to think that I'd taken away the college experience you deserve.

Jack: Well, I'll keep on applying myself.

Freeman: Look, um, next week is reading week, and after that, there's finals, and after that, well... I'm gone. It would just-- it would mean a lot to me if you were there tonight, jack.

Jack: I'll think about it.

[Scene: Pacey's Workplace. Pacey is sitting at his desk, when Rich comes in carrying a bunch of Plane tickets in his hands, and he begins giving them out to various people.]

Rich: I hope you guys packed condoms and toothpaste this morning 'cause we're taking a little trip. You all passed your series 7s, some of you with flying colors, you smarty-pants pansies. So tonight, we celebrate.

Pacey: New Orleans?

Rich: How about that, huh? Yes, we are so obnoxiously wealthy we are flying to the big easy to indulge in all its pleasures for 24 sickening hours. So don't tell me you have to call your mommies or anything. Just admit that first class, free hotel rooms, and good old southern girls who learned to drink before you played Nintendo are all too good to pass up. Pack it up, gentlemen. Logan, 1 hour.

Man: Yeah, baby. [Man laughs]

[Commercial Break]

[Scene: A bar in New Orleans. Rich is sitting at one end of the bar with a girl in his arms, while Pacey is on the other side of the corner from him, talking to a very hot woman.]

Woman: So you guys are here for the weekend, huh?

Pacey: Just the night actually.

Woman: Oh, that's too bad. There's a lot of fun to be had here.

Pacey: Yeah, I can see that.

Woman: I could show you around.

Pacey: You know, I've actually been here before.

Woman: Oh.

Pacey: Yeah, my girlfriend and I, we came through here this summer.

Woman: So you have a girlfriend.

Pacey: Oh, no. No, no. She dumped me.

Woman: Heh. Well, I think my friends are waiting for me, but it's nice meeting you, Percy.

[She walks away, and Pacey turn and watches her go, then notices another hot woman sitting at the bar alone near him.]

Pacey: Hi, there. I don't do guys in mourning.

Rich: Witter, man. You are pathetic, and here I thought you'd be my only competition. You're making this too easy.

Pacey: Well, look, Rinaldi, it would be a lot different if I was actually in this game, which I'm not because women do actually like the sensitive type.

Rich: Yeah, ok, 'cause that's what's been working for me. Right?

[Rich laughs]

[Scene: Hell's Kitchen. Joey is sitting at the bar and the crowd is beginning to pack it in getting ready for the band. Eddie is pouring a drink in front of her.]

Eddie: Everything seems magical when you see it from the other side, right?

Joey: The command with which you pour is staggering.

Eddie: Thank you. How's class today?

Joey: The usual. We're ending gravity's rainbow, and Heston spent a good 5 minutes insisting I'd never understand the experimental ramblings.

Eddie: Well, that's silly. Diane chambers is an extremely well-read character. I'm sure she would have schooled Heston.

Joey: Do, you know, your whole Sam Diane class argument thing, it's very weak. He definitely made more money than her.

Eddie: Yeah, and I make more money than your Worthington colleagues who don't need a job, but that doesn't put us in the same bracket, now does it?

[Audrey comes running up to the bar and stops next to Joey.]

Audrey: Hey, cute bar boy. Give me a sh*t, will ya? I got the shakes. [She hugs Joey] You are so awesome for coming to see me play, and here, buy a round of sh*ts for the future boyfriends of America.

[She takes her drink, and throws some money down on the bar, and then goes back to several guys]

Audrey: Mmm. [Choking] Oh, god. Ah—

[They watch Audrey go into the arms of several guys with her drink]

Eddie: God, who did her parents buy off to get her into Worthington?

Joey: You're more acerbic than usual tonight, if that's possible. Everything ok?

Eddie: Yeah. I'm sorry. I just-- I hate working doubles, and I--I don't like working with Sam.

Joey: No one to flirt with, huh?

Eddie: Yeah, or clumsily insult, whichever you prefer.

Joey: Well, I'll come back up later. Right now, I have to go stroke Audrey's ego.

Eddie: Sounds enticing.

[Joey goes over to Audrey]

[People laughing]

Joey: Hey.

Audrey: Hi, sweetie.

[Scene: The book signing. Jack comes into the book store, and looks around at the large amount of people have shown up, and notices Freeman by a table of his book talking to some man.]

Freeman: Well thanks for coming. Um, hope you enjoy

[Jack walks over to Freeman]

Freeman: Jack, you came.

Jack: Yeah. I, uh... I don't like to let free food go to waste.

Freeman: Well, whatever the reason, I'm glad.

Jack: It looks like a lot of people support your decision.

Freeman: Eh, slow night on campus maybe. It's tricky putting together projects like this book. There's always gonna be a handful of people who'll think that it's bathroom material, but I always held out the naive belief that there would be a reader or two who might find something stimulating beyond easy cultural references.

Jack: Yeah, some of my friends assumed that your class was cultural cliff notes which would pretty much make it Entertainment Weekly, I guess.

Freeman: Did you feel that way?

Jack: All things aside, did I ever seem less than riveted? [Jack notices that Freeman is staring deeply into his eyes] Um, y-your wife, um... must not be too psyched moving to chicago in the height of winter.

Freeman: Actually, she's not going to make the move with me.

Jack: I'm--I'm sorry.

Freeman: Well, let's--let's not. I can talk in circles about where I went wrong, and a Maudlin Freeman isn't gonna do either of us any good.

Jack: Yeah.

Freeman: So I gotta ask. Why did you decide to come? Don't you have somewhere to be?

Jack: Um. No, no. I-- I have some time.

Freeman: That's great. Let me introduce you to some people.

[Scene: Hell's Kitchen. Jen, C.J. and David are all sitting at a table talking while waiting for Jack to show up.]

Jen: I have no idea what is keeping Jack, David. I'm sure it's-- it's a hair-related issue.

David: Nah, it's ok. It's flattering to think that each carefully misplaced strand might be for me.

Jen: Aww.

David: I'm gonna head up to the bar. You guys need anything?

C.J.: No, I'm good.

Jen: I'm fine.

[David goes to the bar, leaving them alone.]

Jen: Well, I'm glad that you came tonight. I know that this might not really be your thing.

C.J.: How do you figure that? I've nothing against good company... and I guess I can't speak to the quality of the music yet, but...

Jen: Oh, well, Audrey is nothing if not a stellar performer.

C.J.: How's she been lately?

Jen: Audrey?

C.J.: Yeah.

Jen: Great. Good.

[They look over and see Audrey Doing another sh*t with the guys, while Joey watches her.]

Audrey: Whoo! Aah!

Jen: Well, maybe not the greatest of greats, but I would give her a solid good. Why do you ask?

C.J.: Well, she seems like she might be a little depressed.

Jen: She doesn't look depressed.

C.J.: Well, it's easy not to look it when you're doing you're damndest not to feel it... or anything, for that matter.

[Over buy the bar, David is waiting for his drink, when his cell phone rings]

David: Hello.

Jack: Uh, David, hey. Uh, it's me. Look, I am so sorry.

David: Oh, don't worry about it. Are you on your way?

Jack: Uh, no, not exactly.

David: Should I call the police maybe? Is there something you can't say in front of the kidnappers?

Jack: I'm coming. I promise. I just got sucked into this nightmare academic schmooze-fest. I have, like, 2 more profound things to say, and I'm out of here. I swear.

David: Hey, don't worry about it. Uh, C.J.'S here, and your friends have all mastered the art of polite conversation. So, I will see you when I see you.

Jack: All right, cool. I'll see ya.

[Scene: The bar in New Orleans. Rich and Pacey come walking by a woman sitting at the table alone, and Rich stops to talk to her.]

Rich: How you doin'?

Denise: Fine.

Rich: I didn't ask how you were looking. I asked how you were doin'.

Pacey: Oh, come on, rich. Even I gotta stop you on that one. I mean, who says that?

Denise: Your friend does apparently.

Pacey: Oh, no. He's not my friend.

Rich: That's right. I'm his boss. Rich Rinaldi.

Denise: I'm Denise.

Pacey: That's a beautiful name for a beautiful girl. I think Denise means drama in its Greek origin, and might I say, Denise, that you have breasts that are begging to be touched.

Denise: Oh, that's a coincidence, since you apparently have testicles that are begging to be castrated.

Pacey: Ok, then. I'll take my goods elsewhere.

Denise: Please do.

[Rich leaves and Pacey watches as he goes]

Pacey: You know, I think rich actually means slime ball in its original form, but I'd have to check the books on that.

Denise: What's your name?

Pacey: I'm Pacey, and I am truly sorry for that, though I'm sure you're used to having men saying all kinds of inappropriate things to you all the time.

Denise: I am. I'm not used to them leaving their considerably more attractive and likable friends behind.

[Scene: Hell's Kitchen. Eddie is filling some drinks at the end of the bar, when Joey comes up to join him.]

Joey: Miss me?

Eddie: How could I when I've been waiting on you and your friends all night, you know?

Joey: Good point. So what are you doing after?

Eddie: Tonight?

Joey: Well, yeah, I mean, I know whenever I get off work there's nothing more depressing than trying to go directly asleep with visions of drunkards dancing in my head, so... I was thinking some sort of social activity would be a good segue.

Eddie: I don't know.

Joey: We could—

[Audrey comes stumbling up to the bar, and slams her empty beer bottle on the bar.]

Audrey: Hey! Let me have another beer for the stage.

Eddie: Nah, I can't let you take that up there.

Audrey: Come on, you guys both work here, like anyone cares.

Eddie: Well, I care actually, and it seems to me you're already wasted.

Audrey: Well, who's fault is that?

Eddie: Uh, yours.

Audrey: Yeah, well, you served me, sucker.

Eddie: Yeah, now I'm cutting you off. Looks like you're gonna have to listen to yourself sing sober. Sorry.

Joey: Come on, Eddie, I mean... it's not like she's going out driving. It's just--she's nervous.

Eddie: Haven't you ever considered our asses might be on the line for serving underage people? Or did that just kinda slip your mind 'cause you're not working tonight?

Joey: What are you talking about? This is a college bar. I mean, you've never cared before.

Eddie: Yeah, well, I care when an underage girl gets drunk and trashes the place on my watch. I'm cutting her off. That's it.

Audrey: Gah, somebody needs to get laid.

Joey: Audrey.

Audrey: Whatever. He clearly takes his job too seriously. Tell me something, Eddie. What's it like looking down the barrel of a g*n and seeing a janitor's uniform and a bus pass?

[Joey turns and gives Audrey a very dirty look.]

Audrey: You'll get me another beer, won't you, sweetie?

Joey: I'm thinking no.

Audrey: Jeez! It's like this bar's run by Donna Reed and Mr. Rogers.

[She slams the beer bottle down again, and it shatters on the bar.]

Eddie: All right, get her out of here.

Audrey: Did you not just witness my magnificent force?

[Emma quickly comes over to get Audrey]

Emma: Yeah, Audrey, did you not hear us warming up up there? Think we're doing it for a lark? Get up there.

Audrey: I love you, you crazy bird!

Emma: Hey, spread the joy on stage, Courtney Love. Ok? We're on.

Audrey: Bah!

Go, go, go.

[They leave]

Joey: I'm not her keeper.

Eddie: No, it's worse actually. You're her friend.

[Audrey stumbles onto the stage and grabs the microphone.]

[Cheers and applause]

Audrey: Hey, how are we all doin' tonight? We're hell's belles, and we are here to throw down this fascist regime. Seems like the establishment don't want us to have a good time. Who wants to stick it to the man?

[Audrey begins performing, One Way Or Another. and quickly becomes aggressive on stage, Knocking down her mic stand, bouncing into the other band members, screwing with the controls on the amps all as she is singing. Emma just watches her but continues to play, shaking her head the entire time. Audrey goes into the crowd, still singing, and makes her way to the bar, where she climbs onto the bar, kicking off drinks, opening the beer taps, and Eddie quickly closes them, and Joey looks to Eddie like to say she was sorry and had no idea what was going on. Eddie puts his face in his hand thinking “Why is this happening to me?” She makes her down the bar, hitting lights along the way, while continuing to sing her song as the bad is still playing. She rips of her shirt and the crowd screams approval. She reaches down and grabs a beer out of one of the guys hands, and takes a swig, and throws the bottle across the room, and Jen, CJ, and David quickly duck, just avoiding getting hit by it as it smashes on the wall behind them. All of her friends look at her in disappointment, as the camera fades to black]

[Commercial Break]
[Scene: Hell's Kitchen bathroom. Audrey is throwing up in the toilet, as Joey is holding her hair back.]

Audrey: Oh. Yeah, ok. I think that's everything. I think that there is some intestine in there.

Joey: Ok. Why don't we go get you some water? How much did you drink?

[Joey watches as Audrey goes over to the sink and turns it on taking a sip of water from it ]

Audrey: Clearly, I don't remember.

Joey: Were you drinking in the changing room? Because I didn't see you have that much at the bar.

Audrey: I said I don't remember. This—

Joey: Audrey, not to sound like an after school special, but this kind of isn't like you.

Audrey: And what exactly is like me? You know, I could've been an alkie since age 6. You don't know.

Joey: It's just—

Audrey: I'm fine! Have you never gotten drunk before?

Joey: Yeah, actually, I have, and it's usually been because I felt pretty awful about something, so... look, I was just wondering if you felt awful.

Audrey: I feel like I don't want to have a soulful exchange about how I'm bad and you're good, if that's what you mean.

Joey: You know, that's not where I was going.

Audrey: Like hell it wasn't. You know, you've mastered the art of holier than thou, Joey. You know, don't feed me a bunch of crap about how you don't need to drink or do dr*gs to have fun because I've given it some thought, and you know what? I've never seen you have fun a day in my life. Except for that whole singing thing, and even then you were just imitating me.

Joey: Ok, you know what? Maybe we should just save this for the morning because we don't want to say anything we'll regret.

Audrey: God! Will you stop protecting me?! I'm so sick of living in this little antiseptic universe you've all created. All we do is we sit around and we drink soda and we talk about how glad we are that we're all friends, which is ridiculous, Joey, because what kind of friend wouldn't know that I broke up with my boyfriend?

Joey: You know what, Audrey? I said I was sorry about that.

Audrey: You know what? I don't even care. I just don't want someone who's completely dropped out of my life suddenly judging it. I mean, did you even notice that I was depressed fore I upset your little boyfriend from southie?

Joey: Eddie is not my boyfriend.

Audrey: Right. I think it's really frigging pathetic that that's the only thing you had the need to comment on.

[Scene: The Book Signing. Jack is walking outside when Freeman comes up to join him.]

Freeman: So have fun tonight, wherever you're going.

Jack: To be honest, I don't know if there's somewhere left to go.

Freeman: I didn't mean to keep you in there with my boring scholastic jabber.

Jack: No. No, I wasn't bored. It's why I'm braving social leprosy.

Freeman: I'm glad you came. There's a part of my book that I wrote after class early in the semester, you'd made a comment in class about the asexuality of good guys in film. It was a small thing I remember, but it sparked something, and I thought no one does that anymore. Sparks something. You were right. Not just in class. You were just... you were right about a lot of things.

Jack: Wasn't waiting for you to tell me that, if that's why you think I'm standing here the cold.

Freeman: Then why are you

Jack: It's sad...that you're probably the most popular professor here, the most inspirational, and yet you felt you had to hide that part of yourself that's real. But you know what? However long it took for you to get here, at least you did it. And that's why I'm standing out here in the cold.

Freeman: A week ago I was this unavailable married man. There used to be about 6 different versions of myself I presented to the world. Now there's just...this. And now I kind of wish I'd noticed it sooner. Or that I'd noticed you. Maybe it's too late. You tell me.

[Freeman, makes his way to try and kiss him, but Jack stops him.]

Jack: I can't. I'm sorry, I can't. I've kept someone waiting all night that the timing was actually right with. It's late. I gotta go. Yeah, I gotta go.

[Scene: Hell's Kitchen. Jen, C.J and David are cleaning up the remnants of the beer bottle that Audrey threw at the wall.]

Jen: Guess you weren't so off base with the whole Audrey thing.

C.J.: You mean her performances aren't typically that inspired?

Jen: Uh, not so Jennifer Jason Leigh in Georgia, no.

[A waitress comes walking up with a bussing tray.]

Waitress: Thank you.

Jen: Audrey's one of the few people that I know who seemed to enter the fold well adjusted and confident. She made all of us seem dramatic.

C.J.: It's hard to keep putting up a front like that, once people expect it from you. You know, you wake up in the morning, you don't feel so great, so you need something to take off the edge. That's what I used to do. When I hit high school, I was shaking by noon if I wasn't drunk. So rather than thinking like, "hey, that can't be normal" I just kept drinking. Provided a steady numb ride through those awkward teen years. It's tough to get off of.

Jen: Yeah. Yeah, but you did. So you must've done something right.

C.J.: Yeah. Yeah. I hit rock bottom. Sure fire way to snap out of something is to wake up from a blackout realizing that you were the guy at the party who told everybody exactly what they didn't want to hear and then alienating the one person that you cared about. So, there's that, which is why I don't date anymore.

Jen: I really--I don't think you have to be so hard on yourself. I--we all mess up.

C.J.: Jen, you really don't want to know that much about me, I promise.

[Scene: Outside Pacey's Hotel Room. Pacey and Denise are making out as they arrive at the door and crash onto it. Pacey begins to quickly try to find the key for the door.]

Pacey: Uh, probably gonna need a key for this.

Denise: That might help. Where would you have put that?

[She reaches down, and grabs his manhood, then makes her way to his pocket and reaches in and pulls out the key.]

Pacey: Uh, hold on one second.

Denise: I'm not so good at waiting. Here we go.

Pacey: Ok.

[He quickly unlocks the door and they make their way into the room.]

[Scene: Hell's Kitchen. Eddie is cleaning up the mess that Audrey left, when Joey comes walking up to join him and help.]

Joey: Some night, huh?

Eddie: Yep.

Joey: I'm sorry about... sorry about the whole drinking, singing debacle. I didn't know it was gonna go that way.

Eddie: It wasn't your problem, right? You weren't working, so why should it matter that your friends were gonna trash the place?

Joey: It's not like they intended to do that.

Eddie: That's not really the point, Joey.

Joey: Well, care to fill me in on what the point is?

Eddie: Why should I make you stand here and listen to my diatribe when you clearly have better things to do? Excuse me.

Joey: Why are you so insistent tonight that I'm wasting my time with you when every time I approach you, it's been because I wanted to talk?

Eddie: Maybe I've had a hard time talking to you because I can't figure out who I'm talking to. Is this Joey Potter my bartending buddy, or is this Joey Potter who runs with the Worthington elite?

Joey: That's funny. I thought there was more of an intimate middle ground.

Eddie: Look, you just learn a lot about people when you see them with their friends, ok?

Joey: You see me with my friends in here all the time. How is this different?

Eddie: It's different when your friends are flaunting state drinking laws and insulting me to my face.

Joey: Look, I'm sorry about that, ok? If it makes you feel any better, I just got a pretty nasty tongue lashing from Audrey in there.

Eddie: What would've made me feel better is if you would've defended me. If you had mentally shown up there, Joey, that might've been nice.

Joey: Eddie, she was drunk. We deal with those people all of the time.

Eddie: You're right, Joey. Why should I make you feel bad for letting your friend ride out her high-class problems? I should be used to it by now, right? My mistake was just thinking you were different from the rest of them.

Joey: How can you say that when you've barely even tried to find out? I don't know, maybe you're just threatened because I tried to find out more about you, but that's just because I was trying to help you—

Eddie: I know what you were trying to do, Joey, and I don't think you should bother. I don't think either of us should because I've been thinking about it, and this little dance we do, it's nothing more than that. It's just flirting.

Joey: You don't think there's anything more here?

Eddie: I don't think there's anything good.

[Commercial Break]

[Scene: Pacey's Hotel Room. Pacey and Denise are still making out, while Pacey backs up to the bed and sits down, and begins to slowly unzip Denise's dress.]

Denise: Can I ask you something?

Pacey: Absolutely.

Denise: This isn't your first time, is it?

Pacey: Am I really that bad?

Denise: No. Just most guys don't bother with the obligatory foreplay. Which is greatly appreciated and all, but I'm kind of a sure thing.

Pacey: Ok, well, I'll do my best to not tend to any of your needs, but I can't promise anything.

[He begins kissing her, and slowly back them onto the bed]

Denise: Seriously, we've been at this for a while now, and your friend didn't pay for the night. [She pushes him down onto the bed and climbs on top of him] Mm... listen it was a nice thing he was doing. You should just enjoy it. But I really...

[Pacey stops her, realizing that she is a hooker, and makes his way out of the bed.]

Pacey: I can't. I can't. I'm sorry.

Denise: I don't have to leave.

Pacey: No. You absolutely don't have to leave. You can stay here as long as you like, but...I--I just... I can't do this. I just thought you were a beautiful woman that I met down in the bar. And that there was a little... something between us, but there's obviously not. And that's fine. But I now have to go to talk to someone, so you stay here and... I'm really sorry.

[He leaves her alone in the room.]

[Scene: Outside the Hell's Kitchen. Jen and C.J. come walking outside talking to one another.]

Jen: So you're sure David's gonna be ok in the all by himself?

C.J.: Oh, yeah. Yeah. He said he'd hang around for another half hour, then call it a night.

Jen: God, I don't know what Jack's problem is, but I'm gonna kick his ass.

C.J.: Well, luckily David's a very patient man.

Jen: You know, I'm just really glad you came out tonight. I was worried you wouldn't want to.

C.J.: You know, you keep saying that. Just 'cause I don't drink doesn't mean I don't socialize.

Jen: But you don't date.

C.J.: No.

Jen: You told me once that I should change my mind about myself, and I think that you should probably do the same thing.

[Jen goes to kiss him, but he stops her]

C.J.: Jen. I can' I'm sorry, it's... it's not nothing to do with you, I promise. You're... you're beautiful, and you're great. I just really can't.

Jen: Ok.

C.J.: I'm gonna get you a cab home, ok?

Jen: Ok.

C.J.: You gonna be ok?

Jen: Yeah. I'm fine. Nothing a little sleep and regret can't cure.

C.J.: Good night.

Jen: Good night.

[Jen pulls away in the cab. C.J. looks across the street and sees Audrey sitting on the curb smoking a cigarette, and goes over and sits down next to her. She puts out the cigarette when she sees him.]

Audrey: I only had a couple of puffs, I swear.

C.J.: I don't care if you smoke.

Audrey: Well, that's shocking. Because I thought for sure there was some sort of lo-jack system on me, and anyone within a mile radius was gonna chastise me for partaking in any sort of substance. You know, I wonder if sugar's ok because I have some sweet tarts in my pocket, and I'm not afraid to eat them.

C.J.: People have been pretty hard on you tonight, haven't they?

Audrey: You know the funny thing is that it was all great when I was drunk. That was a super old time. Now I'm sober, and everything's gone to hell.

C.J.: You know, your friends were just trying to let you know they cared. Maybe they didn't go about it the right way.

Audrey: It's not like I'm a drunk, you know. God, we're in college, for crying out loud. Doesn't anyone just ever have a week that sucks, and they want to forget about it?

C.J.: Does it make you feel better... when you...drink?

Audrey: I feel nothing, which is ideal.

C.J.: How long you gonna keep that up for?

Audrey: I don't know. I don't know.

C.J.: If you wanna talk or...

Audrey: You don't have to sit with me, really.

C.J.: You don't have to say that. If I don't want to be here, I'd have walked away already.

Audrey: Ok. So we'll sit. I don't wanna talk for a while.

[Audrey shivers, and C.J. pulls some gloves out of his pockets and gives them to Audrey]

[Scene: Bourbon Street. Rinaldi and a group of guys and women are walking down the street all grouped together, laughing and having a good time, when Pacey comes running up to them.]

Guy: You owe me 20 bucks, Rinaldi.

Pacey: Rich! Hey, Rinaldi! Come here.

Rich: What's your problem, Witter?

Pacey: My problem is the little trick you just tried to play on me.

Rich: You're not morally opposed to ladies of the night, are you?

Katz: Dude, Witter stuffed a whore!

Pacey: Actually, I didn't, Katz, but you keep talking. You watch how quickly your night ends.

Rich: You didn't even do it? What, you got a problem down there, Witter, or just have trouble taking off your little dress?

Pacey: Is this a joke to you? 'Cause let me tell you, I'm not laughing.

Rich: Tell me about it. No. It was my idea of showing you a good time. Believe me. She didn't come cheap.

Pacey: I forgot that about you. It all relates back to money. You buy your friends, you buy your women, you buy women for your friends. That way it's clean, it's easy. No emotion, right? Well, let me tell you, Rich. The only favor I want you to do for me is take me off your charity list. 'Cause you're pathetic, man.

Rich: Honestly, man, I'm not getting it. A couple of solid hours with a really hot girl you never have to call again, and what, you play tiddly winks? I must be real dumb because it seems like you owe me.

Pacey: You're right. I do. I absolutely—

[Pacey grabs Rich by his coat.]

[Overlapping shouts]

Rich: How dare you do that to me?!

Pacey: I'm pissed!

Rich: I'm really pissed at your moral outrage. No need to get violent. When are you gonna realize fighting the good fight's not worth it?

[Scene: Outside the Hell's Kitchen. David has gotten tired of waiting, and is leaving the bar, when a cab pulls up, and Jack quickly gets out of it.]

Jack: Hey, David. David, I am so sorry. I--I can't believe that you're still here.

David: What, you were hoping I'd be gone?

Jack: No! No. No. Of course not. I'm glad you stayed. I just kept missing my window of opportunity to get out of there.

David: That must've been rough.

Jack: Yeah. I'm not being too convincing, am I?

David: Look, Jack, I'm not so naive coming into this that I didn't expect there to be some baggage. You can't really move into a new relationship until you know the old one isn't gonna lurch up from the dead one last time. So, do what you gotta do.

Jack: I did. I mean, I didn't. I... I didn't have to.

David: You don't have to report to me.

Jack: Well, you're right about the baggage. It's just not... before we got into this, I just wanted to make sure that I was done repeating my mistakes. And I am.

David: That works for me.

Jack: Cool.

David: Yeah. Cool.

Jack: So why did you even bother sticking around here?

David: Hey, don't think I was waiting for the confused likes of you.

Jack: [Chuckles]

David: I was having a good time, and you missed a hell of an act.

Jack: Huh. Did I?

David: Yes. It was one magical night you'll never get back.

Jack: So this one's gonna be tough to top.

David: That's awfully presumptuous to assume we're going out again.

Jack: Oh, ha! I see how it is. I see how it is.

[Scene: Bourbon Street. Pacey walking all alone down the empty street the next morning, trying to think everything through]

[Scene: Joey and Audrey's Dorm room. Joey wakes up and looks across the room at Audrey's bed, and notices that is it still made up from the day before. Joey looks a little worried. Cut to a little later, and Joey is sitting at the desk reading and looks over at the empty bed again.]

[Knock on door]

Eddie: Wow! So this is how the other half lives.

Joey: What are you doing here?

Eddie: Uh, your little friend left her wallet at the bar last night. Can't imagine how she forgot it, with the drunken spectacle and the vomiting and all.

Joey: Thanks.

[She grabs the wallet, and goes to close the door when Eddie stops her.]

Eddie: Wait a minute. Wait, Joey. Last night I said a lot of things I didn't mean.

Joey: Yeah, like what things?

Eddie: Many things. It could be that I have some unresolved anger towards society that has nothing to do with you.

Joey: That's good.

Eddie: Yeah, I've been working on that one a while.

Joey: It almost resembled an apology.

Eddie: Well, you know, I been thinking about it all night.

Joey: What's it?

Eddie: This. Me, you. It didn't feel good.

Joey: What part?

Eddie: The not pursuing it part.

Joey: You know, uh... the pushing away usually comes when there's something to push away from.

Eddie: Please, Joey, I would love to get to the point where I can resent you, if you'll only give me the chance.

Joey: We can't keep doing this.

Eddie: What?

Joey: This. This...saying things we don't mean. Dancing around the subject. I mean, don't you find it maddening?

Eddie: Well, yeah, but I meant that thing about the resentment. Ok. All right, I get what you're talking about. So, what would you say if you said what you meant?

Joey: I'd like to go on a date with you. An actual date. Without the obstacles of pre-teen girls and drunken roommates. What would you say?

Eddie: Well, I'd like to get to know you and prove myself wrong.

Joey: About?

Eddie: Thinking you represent everything I hate. I think you just might represent everything I'm missing. Hoo, ok, so... it's a date. See you later, Joey.

[They shake hands. Then Eddie turns to leave and Joey waves, and the camera fades to black]
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