02x07 - Ambush

Have you never had to play by anybody else's rules?

So you're just a spoiled brat.

Women don't usually talk to me like that.

Oh, because you're so devastatingly attractive.

And the accent, yeah.


So this is a setup, and I'm the old, desperate one?

Something's wrong. It's Mary.

Come with me.


We k*ll somebody, didn't we?


And there is John Booth.

The guy that just bought our network?

Everyone here knows that you're the true creator of "Everlasting".

So you're the one who's calling me "Hot Rachel."

Well, you do kind of look like her.

You're a selfish bitch.

[Grunting, groaning]

You're fired.

So far, you've run me into an epidural, firing my cousin, and some girl's daddy.

Hey, this is my job, and I do it every stupid day of my stupid life.

Calm down, all right? Are you okay?

I don't know!

Are you taking your meds?

Rachel: What am I prescribed for right now... borderline or narcissistic personality disorder?

Because I'm like constantly getting them confused.

Chet: You know, I think Rachel's in love with that guy.

I've never seen her like this before.

I have.

That boy's like a cancer. We need to cut him out.

Hello, gorgeous.


What are you doing right now?

Adam: Here we go again.

♪ ♪

So, there's this thing. [Chuckles]

My cousin's getting married on Martha's Vineyard next month.

Your cousin's getting married?

She is, but I was wondering...


If you'll be my date to the wedding.


It's gonna be a total nightmare, but... after the wedding...


We can go spend a couple days at my family's house in Chilmark.

So, do we have a deal?

Do you want me to beg you or what?


Yes. No, not yes to the beg.

Just, yes, I'd love to go.


[Knock on door]

Madison: Um, Rachel?

Madison, go away!

Uh, I really, really think you should come out here.

Yes, Madison?

I'm sorry.

There's someone here that you're gonna want to see.



Hi, Rachel.

♪ ♪


What are you doing? Get out of here.

Okay, so, um, what part about me not returning your calls made you think I wanted you to show up here in the middle of the night?

Quinn called me.

She did?

Yeah, I'm here to do the show.

Some kind of ex-suitor returns, seeks redemption kind of thing?

You want redemption from "Everlasting"?

No, I don't.

But I'm willing to put up with "Everlasting" because I wanted to see you.

Okay, dude, you've seen me. Like, go.

Rachel, I'm sorry.

I messed up.

I can't believe how badly I messed up.

I shouldn't have listened to Quinn and I shouldn't have run away and I know that.

I've changed.

These past few months, I've been in Africa doing charity work.

You were in Africa, like my Africa?

Like, I went there and I traveled through villages helping them gain access to clean water, and it was amazing.

What are you talking about?

I was... I wanted you there with me, and I tried calling.

I did not call you back. Don't you get it?

Is this about whoever's in that room with you?

Because you and I both know whoever he is, he doesn't matter.

You have no idea what you're talking about, okay?

All right.

I'll be back in the morning, but my flight's not till Thursday.

I'm not going anywhere.

Oh, my God.

Coleman: So, what's his deal?

If Quinn called him, why is his first stop your office in the middle of the night?

That's a really good question.

Um, it's because we have this, like, whole crazy thing.

A thing?

It was like this Stockholm syndrome thing, you know, where they're like... you're, like, basically producing them, and then they, like, fall in love with you.

I just try to forget that it ever happened, which... really...



So let's get rid of him.

He's out of here.

Quinn doesn't get to make executive decisions.

She's not the showrunner anymore.


This is our show.

Exactly. Talk about our show more.

It turns me on.


[Moans] All right, listen.

Be honest, okay?

Was that date better or worse than the funeral?

Well, the funeral had better music, but this time, I got to third base.

[Laughs] Okay, I think you got a lot further than that.

I realy don't understand American sports.

[Laughs] Oh, no.

[Chuckles] Okay.

Okay, we have to stop.

Remember, I told you I have a big day today, okay?

We're gonna go do a little surprise for our showrunner wannabe.

Hmm. Coleman.

You know, I thought he was very impressive when he and Rachel pitched me at the Impact Awards.

Oh. Hmm.


You know, he is impressive.

He's a real go-getter.

In fact, I think that you should definitely, definitely do something with him.

I mean, you know, he's... he's just k*ll time while he's here at "Everlasting," and he's actually right inside.

You could go talk to him right now face to face.

Now? Really, now?


Well, no better time than the present, but you cannot poach Rachel, 'cause I have been working very hard on her for three years, and I don't want that to go to waste, okay?

So hands off.


Understood. Yes.

Understood. [Chuckles]

Coleman: Um, and then we'll bring Darius in when all that's done, and he's not gonna any.

Okay, dude. Got it.

Damn. Walk of shame much?

Where were you?

It's none of your business.

So you brought Adam here, huh?


You're welcome. [Chuckles]

I mean, you should be kissing my ass for this.

You can't make decisions like that without my say-so.

Oh, you mean as opposed to the stellar decisions you've made?

I'm sorry, what?


You know, you want to know why I brought Adam here?

Because his social-media buzz is off the charts.

Oh, I don't even care, actually.

He was a ratings dynamo last year.

No, he was the p*ssy who got left at the altar last year.

He's a catch who had the misfortune of falling for a heartless bitch.

I mean, every woman in America wants to screw the sadness out of him.

Every woman in my office, certainly.

The guy's a knicker-dropper.

Yeah, hey. [Chuckles] Hey.

It's nice to see you again.

I, uh, didn't realize you two were...

[Chuckles] I'm sorry.

Are you saying something?

Hey, uh, so we're gonna run with Adam today, but in the future, though, let's make sure we're definitely all on the same page.

We are all on the same page now.

I mean, unless there's a specific reason, Rachel, why you can't work with Adam?

No, I'm good.

All right, this is gonna be a fun day.

I'll go, uh, prep the ladies.


I will see you later.

Let's go, you little dummmy.

Uh, Coleman, can I have a word, please?

I'd love to hear more from you off of our conversation at the Impact Awards.

Okay, yeah, glad to hear that.

Actually, Rach and I have been working up some really...

You're the one that I've really got my eye on.

So, uh, if it's okay, you and I will have a little chat a bit later, hmm?


Yeah, just the two of us.


Right, okay.



Here's the deal, all right?

We are at week seven, and the natives are getting restless.

Darius is pissed at us and the world after his trip to Alabama, and I need you to re-energize the girls, all right?

Just give them that whole, "Who, me?

I never banged a hooker," face. Break out the accent.

Why did you really bring me back here?

There it is.

I'm giving you the opportunity of a second chance.

You regret how you left things, so why don't you make them better.

With America?

With whomever.

Trunks! I need swim trunks.

Oh, thank you very much.

Now, you are going to get into this little ball squeezer.

No, no, not happening.

Yes, gonna happen, okay?

You're gonna jump in the hot tub with some angry girls in bikinis.

Okay? Thank you very much.

Hey, faster. Can you please walk faster?

Welcome back, meat puppet.

Oh, not again.


Damn, that ass is bite-able.







That is a nice package. I'm sorry.


Can you fit that in one hand, or do you need two hands?

I'm just curious. [Chuckles]

That's fantastic.

Look at those abs.

Fine British sausage.

Hubba, hubba.

Okay, yeah. No, you can throw around all the insults you want.

It is like this all day. Maybe we should all just calm down.

Because Darius doesn't care, okay? I don't know what you've done.

Wake up.

Okay, guys, guys.

He's gonna make a decision 'cause he wants me, okay?

Guys, guys, guys.

I know it's hard, but I have been in Darius' shoes, and he's probably having strong feelings that he's just not sure how to express.

Sometimes a woman really challenges you, and it makes you want to run away, because it's terrifying.

Good Lord, Jameson, he's not talking about you.


And the worst part is I did meet An incredible woman here, and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, but I ruined it.

And I've regretted it every day since.

I just wish I'd tuned everything else out and followed my heart.


And the panties of America drip in unison.

Oh, Rachel, you should screw the talent more often.

Give it a rest, Quinn.

This is ridiculous.

Okay, people, how about we get my current pain-in-the-ass suitor Darius to give a fraction of a crap?

Okay, cut, everyone.

[Bell rings]

That's a wrap. Got it.

I have to tell you, I watched every minute of your season.

It was... thank you. It was so intense.

Yeah, yeah.

You have to tell me everything.

I even heard a rumor about you and Rachel.

Why are you so interested?

I'm just a curious girl.


I think they have drinks for you just over there.



Hey. That was great.

You looked fantastic.


I'm Coleman.

I'm the new showrunner.

Showrunner, right.


Hey, I am so sorry about pulling Rachel away the other evening.

I hope it didn't mess anything up.

It's fine. You can't mess anything up.


It's all good.

Anyway, let's just show the viewers you're not some loser who got dumped and won't give up.

Oh, I can be very convincing when I need to be.

All right, let's, uh, go get you ready for the next segment.


Nice to meet you.


That guy is shameless.

Mm, he's a possessive, entitled man-baby.

That's who he's always been.

And yet you guys had a thing, huh?

Hey, I told you, dude, it's, like, buried like six feet deep somewhere.



'Cause, look, first, it was Jeremy, and now Adam?

You might not have any feelings for your set flings, but they certainly seem to be harboring a few for you.

[Shower running]

Cromwell, I need to talk to you.

Do you want to jump in now?

Okay, enough.

I'm not even kidding. I'm not interested, okay?

So stop with the double talk on camera.

Stop trying to woo me.

Or you could just admit that you miss me.

Dude, get over yourself.

Rachel, you know what we had.

Yes, what we had was a mistake.

Are you trying to tell me that what we had was nothing?


I never loved you, okay?


You never loved loved me?

I never loved you.

♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Ooh, gonna bury me ♪


I'm really happy.

So leave me alone.

♪ Keep 'em goin' down now, let 'em drown ♪
♪ Bury 'em down, bury 'em down ♪

Quinn, are... come on, Quinn.


I'll give you a minute.


You afraid of my undies?

Zip it up.


So I guess I have you to thank for Booth reaching out to me, huh?

Oh, no, it was all his doing.

Turns out the network really loves their little boy wonder.

No, I'm saying you told him to cut Rachel out.

Yeah, I did.

I did that for Booth's sake, and yours, actually.

Wow, that was so thoughtful of you, but actually it turns out Rachel's great at her job.

Yeah, I know.

Oh, see, I know you know.

That's why you're keeping her captive and insecure, so she won't go anywhere else.

Uh, the thing that makes her tick also makes b*mb explode with startling frequency around her.

I mean, tattling to the network, screwing last year's suitor, this whole ugly mess with Jeremy...

That was not her fault, actually!

Absolutely not.

But she's not really capable of managing things on a day-to-day basis like the rest of us.

I keep her in line here, you know?

I mean, do you really want to be on a full-time b*mb squad, hmm?


Rachel's fine, Quinn.

Turns out her big problem is working for a controlling, manipulative, bitch.

Hmm. At least I'm effective.

You're such a dick.

Ladies, I will help each of you pick a date to pitch to Darius... one that reflects who you are.

And Darius will choose one date to go on.

Good luck, everyone.

Darius, we have gotten to know each other so well over the past few weeks and...

I'm a cop, so people don't always know how passionate and sexy I can be.

Roaring fire, bottle of wine.

I was supposed to go to Venice with my fiancé, but...

Let me take you for the ride of your life.

I want to feel the heat with you, Darius.

I'm sorry. I don't know what that date is.

It's sex.

What do you say?

How exciting that you ladies get a chance to open yourselves up to Darius.

Rachel, Darius is a freaking zombie up there.

He's still pissed about Alabama.

Yeah, well, homeboy's been like that for a while now, in case you haven't noticed.

You know, maybe having Romeo around wasn't such a bad thing.

At least he could actually manage him.

Graham: Ladies, this...

Hey, just a word of advice, mate, having been where you are... pick the one with the dead fiancé.

Right. Did you not see that Bentley?

You know, willingly spend time with the sob story, and you're the guy could never call any woman a bitch.

And come on, there are worse ways you can spend a few hours.


You're facing your toughest choice yet.

But fortunately, you've had Adam here to help guide you.

Right? [Chuckles]

Definitely. Thank you, Graham, and thank you, Adam.

Ladies, tonight I will be going on a date with Chantal.


Oh, my gosh, Darius.

Okay, everyone, and that's a cut.

[Bell rings]



You all right?

Darius: I'm good.

[Indistinct conversations]

Oh, my God.

Hey, can I...

Why are you talking to me?

Listen, no one was expecting you to marry Beth Ann, but you came off like a gentleman, the kind that is hire-able for certain high-profile jobs.

This is a win. I am on your team, I promise.

Are you not tired of giving the speech?

'Cause I know I'm tired of hearing it.

Everything all right?

Why would you come back here to this snake pit?

Why? Why?




So, you like how I set up Chantal?

I don't care about Chantal. You want a gold star?

Well, it seemed like you needed him to at least pretend to care.

It's the kind of nonsense I'm willing to do to get you back.

Okay, listen, I am with Coleman now.

I'm sorry you can't accept the fact that I have a boyfriend.

I'm not talking about boyfriends.

I'm talking about you and I.


Do you have to get... would you just stop this nonsense?

I want you now, and you want me.

You're... I cannot do this here right now.


Okay, meet me in my office in five minutes.

Five minutes?

Yeah, in five minutes.

Completely eccentric. I love it. I love it.

I mean, this will work beautifully.

That's everything we want to do, and we're ta...

Hey, Rachel.

Hi. I'm sorry.

I didn't know you guys were having a meeting.

No, uh, I just wanted to hear some of Coleman's ideas for new projects.

His ideas? Well, that's so exciting.

But he couldn't stop talking about his producing partner.

Hmm. It appears you are a valuable asset.

Must be why no one wants to let you go.

Thank you. That's very nice of you. Thanks.

Um, look, we'll continue this later, shall we?

John, thank you so much.

Yes, pleasure, pleasure.

That was fantastic.

Oh, my God. I'm so sorry about that.

I was gonna tell you.


I... Quinn was...



She... what, she was...

Yeah, of course. trying to cut me out.

I wasn't gonna say anything until I convinced him to meet with both of us just...

It's okay. You know, what? It's totally fine.

You could have just pitched him on your own. It's big deal.

No, no!

It's fine.

I couldn't. I couldn't.

[Cellphone vibrating]

This... everything we want to do together, all the TV that we want to make... that's... we're a team.



Okay. All right.


[Both panting]

Can you just hold on one second?

Just give me a second.



Don't tell me you have to leave right now.

No, I don't.

Don't you do that.

It's totally fine.


Adam: Rachel Goldberg.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Whoa, okay.

Really? That's what you wanted me to see?

I'm sorry. Do you want to get out, please?


What did he mean this is what you wanted him to see?

I don't know.

He must have just misunderstood something that I'd said.

He misunderstood?

Look, if there's something going on here, Rachel, please.


I mean, he's... I promise you that he's gone, and that there... there is nothing going on.

He's just out of our lives for good.

Everyone has baggage.

Okay, I get that. I have crazy exes, too.

They don't call me at 3:00 A.M. let alone show up at my work at 3:00 A.M.

Most of us, we grow up, and we deal with it.

Do you think this is cute... the exes popping up, the drama?

I don't.

I have been so honest with you...


About everything, about everything I see for our future.

So just deal with this, please?

I will.


Madison: Can someone move those over here, please?

Graham: I can barley swim.

I'm not getting on this. Yes.

Yes, you are getting on the boat.

No, I'm not getting on the boat. Well, are you gonna give me a life jacket?

He is not getting on the boat.

You don't need a life jacket.

This thing... life jacket?

Just let me handle this.

You guys, this isn't a gondola.

This is a row boat.


Look, I spent $50 on this boat on Craigslist, and it's gonna be a gondola by tonight.

Graham: Madison! Look, I don't want to be going on on the boat.

Madison, Madison, look at how unsafe this is. It's so safe.

You're not gonna fire me.

What are you doing here?

Great to see you, too, Rach. Darius called.

He's not exactly happy with the way things are going here.

I can't say I blame him.

[Both laughing]

You laughing at me?

It's fun, isn't it?

Yeah, it is.

You look so handsome with that on.

And you look beautiful.

Mm, are you kidding?

You know?


I have three brothers.

You're kidding.

No, well, two and then Romeo.


How did I not know this?

[Sighs] Because we haven't gotten the chance to talk, and that's not on you.

That's on me.

'Cause I know I've been made into this one-note character... girl with the dead fiancé.

And I know that you might think that I'm not ready to move on or that I'm not open, but I am.

And I want to prove that to you.

Well done. I'm impressed.

They give me $150, and this is what I do.

Hey, Rachel?

I thought you were gone.

I was on my way back to the hotel, but I realized I had to look you in the face and ask you why are you still here with Quinn in this place.

You don't get to judge me just because you're jealous.



Jealous that you're desperately banging your boss in the hopes he takes you up the ladder in the the gaping hell hole that is "Everlasting"?

Okay, he's so much more than my boss.

He invited me to his cousin's wedding... on Martha's Vineyard.

Do you hear yourself?

Wake up.

This place is a vortex of evil and dysfunction turning everything it touches to shit.

How do you not see that? It's ruining your life.

And, what, you're some, like, moral authority now?

You, like, kiss a few AIDS babies for some photo op, and you think that you're doing God's work?

I'm actually helping people.



Tell me, who do... who do you think you're actually helping here?

Um, the 16 million people who watch my television show every week.

Okay, I have single-handedly broken down all of these preconceived notions on love and race because Coleman and I, we are making television that matters.

I don't know if you've noticed it, but we actually have the first black suitor.

That's groundbreaking.

Your black suitor...


Is on a fake date in a fake boat on a fake lake.

That is "Everlasting," and you're completely delusional.


All right, well...


I'm going to show you that I'm ready.



These are the ashes of my fiancé.

And I'm want let him go here with you tonight so that my heart can be ready to love again.


Fan, fan, fan.

Okay, wait, what?

Hey, get in there with the fan. Make it blow hard.

Ashes are... I just want to show you, Darius, that I'm ready for this.

No, wait you don't... you don't have to... oh, my!

What?! Oh, my God, Darius!

I'm so sorry!

Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

Wait, come here. Oh, my God, dead guy in my mouth!

Oh, my God, I'm so sorry, Darius.

Okay, cut, everyone, cut.

Let's reset. Let's take 20.

[Bell rings]

Rachel, are you okay?

Quinn: How nice. Adam came back.

How does that feel?

That's got to feel good, right?


He's fighting for you.

He's here for you.

Yeah, it didn't work... um, your plan.

You know, the using Adam to break up Coleman and me?

What were you gonna do? Did you want to keep me all to yourself, or did you, uh... you wanted me to, like, come crawling back to you?

What was it?

I wanted to show you Coleman for who he really is.

Okay, I know who Coleman really is.

He's the new showrunner that they brought in to replace you.

And yet you're still here.

I mean, you seriously have this, like, great guy, and you're spending all of your time here trying to ruin my life.

You need to get over me.

[Chuckles] Get over you?




"No"? What does that even mean?

You're, like, obsessed with me, okay?

Get a life.

[Indistinct conversations]

John: [Sighs] There you are.

Uh, here I am.



But I'd really like to be anywhere else.

Well, then, uh...

So, let's go.

Yeah, let's get out of here.

How about, uh, Post Ranch Inn?


It's like... it's like they're hell-bent on making me look like a fool.

I know, I know.

I can't have one normal date?

Okay, so...

One normal date?!

So, what do you want to do, D?

You trying to get up out of here?

You damn right I want to get out of here.

Let's get up out of here.

Mnh-mnh, cheers!


Darius, why didn't you pick me?

I do not know.

Okay, I must have been out of my damn mind.

You girls want to have some fun?

Hell, yeah.

That Bentley's still in the driveway.

Yes, it is!

Let's go. Come on.

Let's go, come on.

Hurry up. Hurry up.

Let's go. Let's go.

Yes, I like where your head's at!


Don't fall.

I'm not falling.

Thank you.

Come on.


[Beep, rewinding]

What are you up to?

Photo k*ll.

Budget approvals.

Hmm, fun stuff.

Oh, yeah.


Um, well, I wanted to tell you that I think that you were right about all of my baggage.

I don't think it's cute.

I totally get it.



I do want to change.

Okay, I want to be with you.

You know, I, like, want to go with you to your cousin's wedding.

I want to make groundbreaking television that we've talked about together.

I want... I just really want to do it all with you.

Could you please say something?

Madison: Rachel, they're taking the car.

Go for Rachel. What's going on, Madison?

Rachel, they're taking the car.

Who is taking...

Oh, damn it! Darius.


What are they doing?

Wait, pull up the feed.

Right there. Madison?

Madison: They're gonna take it. I can't stop them.

How is that possible?

Coleman, we should just call the cops.


Don't you see?

This is the show that we want to make right here.

What are you talking about?

We have to call the cops.

On two black guys in a Bentley in this town?

That won't end well.


Make the call.


[Cellphone dings]

Hi, yes, I'd like to report a stolen car.

Can you get "C" cam in a van?

Hey, uh, Madison, drop everything right now and get "C" cam in a van for us right now.

[Indistinct conversation]

I'm so glad to be out of that house.

If I had been cooped up with a bunch of bitches for one more minute, I was gonna scream.


Oh, my God. No, not you.

No offense.

It's fine.


[Siren wailing]

Hold up, hold up.


Hold on. It's fine.

Someone's getting in trouble.

No, it's fine.

All right, stay cool.

Romeo: Stay cool... two Darius Beck autographs for our friends in blue, and we are green.

Trust me.

Hey, where's my Darius Beck autograph?

[Indistinct whispering]

[Police radio chatter]

We've got the 10851, four occupants.

We're approaching the vehicle.

I got you, baby, What if we get...

[Police radio chatter]

Hi, there, officer.

License and registration, please.

Listen, I'm Darius Beck, pro football player.

The quarterback? Is it him?


I can't... I'm not sure.

I need to see some I.D.

Oh, my.


Um, look. This is crazy.

Look, I don't have my I.D. on me.

They took it back at the, um...

I'm on a reality show, okay?

And they...

W-we're on "Everlasting."


We're all on "Everlasting."

Yeah, no phone, no wallet.

If you guys are on the show, where are the cameras?

Look, this isn't part of it, okay?

I'm just taking these girls out for a spin.


All right, but listen, I'm Darius Beck.

One of us is gonna marry him!


Miss, are you okay?

No, she's fine. She's just had too much to...

I'm not talking to you.

I'm gonna need an answer from you, miss.

Are you okay?

Look, I'm for real.

Romeo: She's fine. She had too much to drink.

And he really is Darius Beck.

She's not talking to you!

This car's been reported stolen.

I can't see.

What? - Whoa.

Sir, I need you to step out of the car.

[All arguing indistinctly]

You have it wrong... all wrong.

Step out of the vehicle right now.

Woman officer: Officer Pyne, get the driver out of the car and get the situation under control.

No, you do not have to do that.

They have to have cause to make you get out.

I said shut up. You don't talk to him.

Get out! Out! That's right. Let's go.

Get out of the car.

All right, look, I'm out.

Go on, turn around.

I'm out, okay?

Turn around.

Okay, I'm out.

Do not lay your hands on him!


Keep your hands where I can see them! Get out of the car!

Get out of the car!

No, no, we got to do something.

No, no, no, no, no, not yet.

This is how you know when you're getting good stuff... stuff that matters... when it's hard.

Darius: Hey, look, you don't know who I am? Whoa, hey!

Yeah, yeah, well, we don't care who you are.

Ah, wait.

Hands behind your back.

You don't know who I am. Listen.

Stop it! He's not okay.

I'm gonna sue. Now, look.

You think we haven't heard that before?



Stop! It's his back! - Control the suspect! - Be careful!

No, no, no, I'm stopping this now.

Coleman: Rachel, wait. Rachel! Rachel!

Hey, I'm Rachel Goldberg!

I'm the one who called! Don't hurt him!

Back up!

Don't hurt him!



[Distorted shouting]

Back up, back up! I said back up!

I'm unarmed! I'm unarmed!

What did you do?!

I came when it happened.

Rachel, what are we doing?!

[Siren wailing]


He's been sh*t! Can we get him an ambulance, please?

[Police radio chatter]

Male Officer: I still have a pulse.

[Cellphone vibrating]

Hmm. Ohh!


John: The office again?

Mm. You're right.

It gets easier every time you don't answer it.

Told you. It's the secret to life.



[Cellphone vibrating]

Oh, please, please, make it stop.

Keep saying the dirty word, please.

Delegate, delegate, delegate.


I'll tell you what?

I'll do you one better than that.

[Cellphone beeps]


And how's that?


That is very, very dirty.


Look, if we're really gonna do this, there's, uh, something I need to tell you.

You're the weirdest person I've ever met.



And I feel I may be falling in love with you.

And I can't believe I'm saying this...

I want children.

More than one, less than five, but our children... me and my hypothetical partner in this endeavor, who, theoretically, could end up being you.

Unless that's something that's not in your plan.


I never expected this to happen between us.

I never meet anybody I actually...


Me, neither.


[Indistinct conversations]


Coleman: Detective, detective, that's my employee.

Man: Ms. Goldberg... You are legally not allowed to talk to her without a lawyer present. You know that, detective.

We'll get you out of here.

I need to talk to Ms. Goldberg.

Go around and check up on the girls for me right now.

I need them to not be saying anything that's harmful.

It's my fault.

If I hadn't run out, he wouldn't have sh*t him.

It's my fault. You can see it right there.

Like, look really quickly.

I got it, I got it. Stop.

It's not your fault. It's was the cops.

You know that.


They were out of line.

I'm gonna handle them right now.

I just need you to go and take care of the contestants, okay?

I'm gonna take care of you.


[Police radio chatter]

Thank you.

Detective, where were we?


It still works?

Did I forget to mention that it does that?


Ooh, it's the network.

This one you can't delegate.

Hello, Gary.

It's a little late to...

Wait, slow down. Slow down.

Take a breath, Gary. Breathe.


Okay, yes.

That is unfortunate. I agree.

And Coleman certainly dropped the ball, Gary.

Yes, I will be there right away.

I-I will handle everything.



[Cellphone beeps]

No, not right now.

I can't believe this happened.

They shouldn't have taken the car.

Oh, what... but they should have gotten pulled over for no reason?

Rachel called the cops.

I told her they took the car, and she... Wait, what did you...

Rachel called the police and then went out there to film it?

For real?

Hm... yeah.

[Indistinct conversations]


You know, I have eaten this crap for so long now, and that's on me.

But you, with your preachy, holier-than-thou bullshit... first, you pat yourself on the black for getting a black suitor and contestants who get treated like garbage, and now your plan is to, what, Rachel, just expose how r*cist the police are by getting a brother sh*t?

If Romeo dies, this is all on you.

And this is not your story to tell.

So why don't you stop trying to help because there's a very good chance everyone might be better off without you?

♪ ♪

[Door opens, closes]



I want to see Darius.

Rachel, what happened? What did the officers say?

It was terrifying.

[Indistinct conversations]

Woman: This is going off on another tangent all together.

I can't right now.

Do you know where we are?


Rachel, are you okay?



You're here?

Yeah, Chet called. He told me what happened.

Are you, uh... hey, look, I'm... Can you just leave?

Look, I'm sorry for what I said earlier.

I'm... I didn't... I was lashing out.

So I'm sorry. I...

Can you just please leave?

No, I'm not running away.

I'm here for you, so let me help.

Uh, I know we loved each other, Rachel.

I've never stopped loving...

Dude, can you just stop, please?

We did love each other, and you left, okay?

Well, I'm here now.

There was, like, this tiny, little window of hope where you could have, like, saved me, and you didn't.

And now every single thing inside of me is just, like, this little black hole.

It's, like, dead inside.


I know that, but I'm here now.

Please, can you just go?


[Crying] It's too late! Can you please go?!

Rachel, don't.

Can you please just go?!

[Screaming indistinctly]


[Tailgate opens]

[Indistinct conversations]

♪ ♪

[Cellphone beeps, ringing]



"Meet me on the balcony"? What's up with the mystery text?

I wanted you to meet me on the balcony.

Great. Look.

I don't really have time for secret meetings right now.

We have a bit of a situation inside, in case you haven't noticed.

Oh, a situation?

No, what you have is the shit show of the century.

I leave you for one night. What the hell were you thinking?

Um, maybe that I got you the most amazing footage of possibly the most important story this show has ever even...

You put our suitor in the hospital.

You got Romeo sh*t, and you filled my mansion with cops and lawyers.

Would you give me a break?

Oh, that's exactly what you're getting.

Go home, Coleman. You're done.

Excuse me? I'm sorry.

It sounded like you told me I'm done.

You don't really have that authority because I happen to be...

The showrunner?

Yeah, not anymore. It's me again.

I mean, actually, it kind of always was.

Let's just admit that, but Gary just made it official.

I don't believe you.

Yeah, well, you know what?

Why don't you just call Gary from your phone in your car on your way home?


Who's that?

Rachel's mother.


♪ ♪

Oh, my God, thank you for coming.

Hey, hey, what the hell happened in there?

All I know is that Romeo was sh*t five feet from me.

I mean, I was so scared.

I mean... this is a reality show.

How could this happen?

Like I said, you don't know the half of it.

Jeremy, just tell me.


[Cellphone beeps]

[Engine starts]

♪ Staring out to dark ♪
♪ Your reflection stares right on ♪
♪ Searching for the ones ♪
♪ With whom my lover will move on ♪


Sit up, sweetheart.



Take the medicine, sweetheart.

That's how you get better.

You know I love you, right?

♪ Ohhhhhhhh ♪