04x12 - And When I Die

[bunniefuu]

Bill and Eric are here to blow up the place.

If we don't get out, we're all gonna die.

You may leave at any time.

Ah!

Eric!

Let the girl go.

The other Eric is still here.

So what's the problem?

I love you.

I love him, too.

k*ll yourselves, and she walks free.

I don't think so!

No!

I'm sorry, okay? Sookie's fine.

Get out of my sight before I k*ll you.

Alcide... What the f*ck is goin' on here?

You m*rder*d my brother. I'm gonna snap your neck with my own hands.

Sam!

What did you do?

Debbie Pelt.

I abjure you.

We need to force

Antonia out of Marnie's body,

and we need Casey's

body to do that.

Oh, G...

Even without your blood in me, you are all I think about.

I'm gonna lose my best friend.

I was tryin' to find my way out the woods, and I heard a zap.

Make love to me.

It felt so real.

You want to know what's real?

There's a waitress named Holly who thinks that you're just the cutest lawman.

Lafayette, did you hear anything I just said?

Sorry for pushing you into the magic before you were ready.

Thought I was helping you, but...

I was acting just like my f*ckin' abuelo .

You were right, baby.

This kind of power, it's not meant for us.

It's too strong. Or we're too weak.

But I swear...

To whatever the f*ck is out there, if you want to lead...

A magic-free life from here on out, I'm all for it.

Hey.

Are you okay in there?

Yes.

Eat your breakfast.

I know it's not fried in pig fat or whatever secret deliciousness you use...

But I worked hard on it.

I'll see you after work.

Lafayette.

Sss... Tut-tut, tut-tut.

True Blood 4x12

And When I Die Original Air Date on September 11, 2011

♪ When you came in

the air went out

♪ And every shadow

filled up with doubt

♪ I don't know who you think you are

but before the night is through

♪ I want to do bad

things with you

♪ I'm the kind to

sit up in his room

♪ Heartsick and eyes

filled up with blue

♪ I don't know what you've done to

me but I know this much is true

♪ I want to do bad

things with you

Ow!

♪ I want to do real

bad things with you ♪

Hey there.

Mornin', Sook. You get any sleep?

My nerves are sh*t.

After everything we've been through...

It's a miracle we're not screamin'

in a padded room somewhere.

Tara, do you think Gran's in heaven?

Well, I've always considered myself to be an atheist.

But if heaven does exist, I'm pretty sure...

Adele Stackhouse would be like the president of it.

Why you thinkin'

about that, anyway?

Marnie channeled Gran.

'Least I think it was her. She warned me about Antonia.

Told me not to give my heart to Eric.

Well, she did have all the sense in the family.

This mornin', I keep feeling like she's here.

You mean watching over you?

No. I mean, like here, here.

I, I know it's probably just some residual weirdness from...

Everything that's been goin' on...

But, I just can't shake this feelin'.

Well, if she was here, what do you think she'd say to us?

To be good to each other.

And wear more sunscreen.

And stop gettin' into so much dang trouble.

What are we, like, magnets for f*cking craziness or somethin'?

Lord, I hope not.

Someday, I see myself growin' old and...

Sittin' on the porch with my grandbabies on my lap, just watchin' the sunset.

Hope I get to sit on that porch wit'cha someday.

Me, too.

Oh... He was a devious little son of a bitch...

But somewhere in there he had a good heart.

Not a lot of people got to see that. I was lucky enough to be one of 'em.

Well, thank you for comin'.

It would have meant a lot to my brother.

He said...

"Sam sh**t' me was the best thing that ever happened to me, Ms. Fortenberry.

"Cause it brought me to you and the Lord."

Oh... Sweet boy.

'Course, then he stole a bunch of my clothes and jewelry.

Even a pair of my underpants.

And my favorite church shoes.

Well, I'm sorry.

Um... Nobody taught Tommy how to love somebody without hurtin' 'em.

I let him down that way, too.

My guess is nobody taught you neither.

We all do the best we can with what we got.

I'm gonna bring by one of my... my famous pork rind casseroles later.

No. No, don't trouble yourself, Ms. Fortenberry. Oh, nonsense.

Tommy may not have been my flesh and blood, but...

He was a son to me.

You call me Mama from now on.

Uh... We're all the family we got left.

Hey...

Jason Stackhouse, you are a good person.

Yes, you are. Shut up.

Hey, Jason!

Hey, buddy. Uh...

What'cha doin'?

Ah... Oh, just workin'. You know?

What you doin'?

Just chillin'. You know, it's a nice day...

Um...

Moist.

Somebody die?

No.

Listen, we gotta talk, man...

Uh...

Huh?

You mind, you mind puttin'

that thing down first?

Listen...

We've, we've been friends a long time.

You remember...

Whoa... Chicka, chicka, boom, boom!

I had sex with Jessica.

Yeah...

I ain't jokin'. I wish I was, but I ain't.

How?

Kind of a weird question to ask, man.

But if you really want to know, uh...

Missionary, then doggie, then her on top.

I mean, it was nothin' too kinky...

No, how could you do that to me! Not, how did you f*ck my girl.

Listen, I'm sorry, man.

But, technically...

Hey, technically, she wasn't your girl no more.

Uh, you, you, you said you never wanted to see her again.

Yeah, f*ck you!

We had a code, and you broke it!

You coulda had anyone, anyone you wanted.

I'm not you, man. She was the only one.

It's... I drank her blood.

I couldn't think about anything else.

I tried to fight it, but it, it just happened.

Doesn't just happen. You make choices.

You make f*cked-up, selfish, piece o' sh*t choices!

All right. You made your point, Hoyt.

You made your point... Ahhh! Oh!

Ain't nothin' more important to you than your d*ck!

Not even your best friend.

What Jess and I had, it was real...

And you ain't never gonna have that, not with her...

Not with anybody, 'cause there's somethin'

inside you that's... It's just missin'.

Sorry.

Lafayette.

Lafayette, listen to me. I know you're in there.

Whatever Marnie's making you do, you have to fight her!

You think your little fry cook can overpower me?

True, his body is younger and stronger than mine was...

And the magic in him is potent. Clumsy but potent.

He is no Antonia.

Marnie, before Antonia came along, you were afraid of your own voice.

You talked to the dead because they were your only friends.

That's why you wanted possession so badly, because you felt lonely... helpless.

I thought you were my friend. I trusted you.

And you took her away from me!

She wanted to leave, Marnie.

Antonia knew you weren't fighting a righteous w*r.

She knew that all you really cared about was power!

You don't deserve to speak her name!

Traitor! Antonia was a hero, a martyr.

Unlike this Lafayette coward, whom I've had to take by force!

Jesus, this bitch is

strong and seriously homicidal.

Call me bitch again, boy...

And I'll cut out your eyeball and feed it to you.

I can't feel pain, but you will.

Marnie, please don't hurt him. I'll do whatever you want.

Just tell me. Tell me what you want us to do.

I want...

What your grandfather passed down to you in the blood...

What you've been running from your whole life...

I want your magic, brujo .

All of it.

Hey, Arlene.

Happy Halloween.

Oh, it's Halloween today?

Yup.

Can I interest you in a hand sandwich? Oh!

We're zombies.

Zombies are the new vampires. Didn't you know that?

Wow, no, I did not know that, but you're severed toe necklace is super cute.

Thank you.

Is Sam around?

Oh, Lord,

nobody's told her yet.

Come in.

Hey.

Hi.

I'm sorry about Tommy. I just heard.

The funeral?

Yeah, well, nobody knew about it.

My brother didn't have a whole lot of friends around here.

You do.

Well, I hadn't seen you in awhile.

Figured you had a lot goin' on of your own.

Oh, Sam...

I was pretty sore after you fired me and all, but...

I would have been there for you.

I never fired you. You... You're the one who didn't show up for shifts all week.

Not to be a stickler for details, but...

You told me I was nothing but trouble and to get my stuff and get outta here.

You know what? I wasn't myself that day.

I tell you what. How about we let bygones be bygones, huh?

Does that mean I can have my job back?

As long as you can start right now.

Lafayette's MIA, and with it bein' Halloween and all...

We sure could use an extra pair of hands.

Can I have another uniform? I kinda threw mine in the trash.

No uniforms today.

Oh, no.

Oh, yeah.

You want your job back or not?

I'm gonna get you for this, Sam.

Nobody likes an angry bunny.

Samhain was Wicca's greatest holy celebration...

A night we honored and communed with our dead.

Now, people only know it as Halloween.

Children feed their fat faces with candy and...

Run in fear from evil green hags they call witches.

The vampires have done a thorough job of demonizing our most sacred Sabbat...

Turning our religion into a joke.

I agree with you.

Vampires suck.

That's why you need to let go of Lafayette before they find out.

They'll k*ll him, Marnie. Just like they k*lled you.

If you hadn't betrayed me, I would still be alive.

Besides, it's the only host I have.

He's not a host, he's a person.

W...with a whole life and people who love him.

We must all make sacrifices in time of w*r.

I made mine, and now you will make yours.

You can't trade magic like f*ckin' Pokemon cards!

I would gladly give you this sh*t inside of me if I knew how, but I just don't!

You're afraid.

Yes. And you should be, too.

Because what's inside of me is seriously dark.

I'll fight darkness with darkness.

Who are you fighting for? Huh?

Antonia's gone, the circle's broken.

They fear you more than they fear the vampires!

You've turned into everything that you hate! Shut up!

You will give me what I want, or I will wring the life out of this body...

'Til there is nothing left but an empty sack.

Okay, enough! Stop it!

I'll do it.

Most Holy

Death, Lady of the Shadows...

Ogoun Ferei, Ogoun

Shango, Nago Piman...

Shows my true face.[/i]

Give it to me.

Give it all to me.

Lafayette...

I'm sorry.

Take off your mask before you eat now.

Hey, you already had yours.

I'm eatin' for two.

Hey, you better start behaving yourselves right now...

Or you're gonna be trick-or-treatin'

down at the trailer park again.

Now, do you want a bag of empty Coors cans and food stamps?

Or do you want candy? It is your choice.

Coby, Lisa, I want you to meet my friend, Emma.

Hi, Emma.

Hey.

Hey.

That's, uh, quite a costume you got there, Lisa. What are you supposed to be?

Jenelle from Teen Mom 2 .

Don't even get me started.

And what are you, cutie-patootie?

I'm either gonna be a shapeshifter like my mommy...

Or a werewolf like my daddy. He's dead.

All righty then. Gonna get back to work.

Private Bellefleur.

I heard you were dead.

I heard you were crazy.

Well, yeah. That, that's still true. What the hell you doin' in Bon Temps?

Just passin' through. Thought I'd look you up.

You look like sh*t.

Yeah, I'm a zombie.

Uh-huh. Yeah, but look...

Wait'll you meet my wife. Arlene!

Arlene Fowler-Bellefleur...

This is Sergeant Patrick Devins, United States Marine Corps.

First of the first.

Mrs. Bellefleur, it's an honor.

Well, it's nice to meet you, too.

Terry's told me absolutely nothin' about you.

Perfect. Then I won't have to lie.

You got time for a drink with a man whose life you saved?

Twice. Huh?

So, does this mean you aren't mad at me anymore?

It's hard stayin' mad at'cha. Especially in those ears.

Sam's idea of payback.

Listen, about the other night, I should have thanked you.

I shouldn't have lost it like that.

I understand why you did.

Where's Debbie?

Oh, Alcide. What happened?

You were right about her.

But she changed.

People don't change. They just find new ways to lie.

I know you don't want to believe that right now, and...

I didn't come here to lecture you.

Something tells me you're about to anyway.

You remember when you said that if you were smart...

You would have fallen in love with someone like me?

Alcide, don't.

People always say follow your heart.

What if your heart keeps telling you to do the same stupid sh*t...

Over and over again?

What if our hearts can't be trusted?

If it's our brains we should be listening to?

You're hurt and angry right now. I get it. I've been there.

No. I'm seeing clearly.

Debbie's out of my life, for good this time.

I'm done with the drama.

I want you to be done with it, too.

I can't change who I love.

Lord knows I've tried.

Then try harder.

Herveaux. Where?

You sure?

I'll be there as soon as I can.

I gotta go.

Anything I can do?

Just think about what I said. And try not to get yourself k*lled.

I'll work on that.

Lafayette?

Jesus? Anybody here?

Hello?

Lafayette?

Hey, Sookie. Can I borrow that lighter?

Holly, you scared the bejesus out of me.

I'm just a fairy, honey. Ain't nothin' scary about fairies.

Yeah, right.

You don't mind, do you?

Halloween makes me kinda jumpy, too. Always has.

Wiccans, we call it Samhain or the Witches' New Year.

It's the day that the veil between the living and the dead is at its thinnest.

You can just feel it in the air, you know?

Want a puff?

Uh, no, thanks. When I'm high, I can't shut out the thoughts at all.

It's like the whole world's screamin' at me.

Oh, see, it calms my nerves.

Mother Earth's Valium.

So all day, I just had this, this terrible feeling in my gut, you know, this dread?

Mmm.

I'm sure it's just a hangover from everything that happened with Marnie and all.

I, I've had the same feeling.

Tara? Tara, what, what is it? What happened?

She's back.

Who's back, honey?

Marnie.

How's that possible? She d*ed right in front of us.

She k*lled Jesus.

I think she's inside Lafayette.

Okay, thanks, Ginger.

Ginger says Eric's been missin' since nightfall.

Bill?

Not answering his phone.

Oh. I knew it was in here somewhere.

You carry salt in your purse?

Yeah, and sage and a lock of my Aunt Josie's hair.

It's like a Wiccan first aid kit.

Hey, any o' you two got a mirror?

Thanks.

You ever done anything like this before?

Goddess, no. Usually, I just...

Light a candle and ask the spirits to make sure my boys don't end up in jail or...

Knock somebody up, but, but so far, that's worked out okay. So...

Sook, you can't let them hurt him.

If Bill and Eric find out Marnie's inside Lafayette...

Yeah, I have a feeling they already know.

Any idea how to get us out of this one, Your Majesty?

You could summon Pam.

You could summon Jessica.

Hmmph.

Oh, so you'd sacrifice my progeny, but not your own?

How very unkingly of you.

I liked you better when you were brain damaged.

Sookie.

As your friend Lafayette would say, what goes around comes around, b*tches.

Lafayette...and Marnie. Please don't do this.

After all they've done to you, you protect them.

k*lling Bill and Eric isn't gonna make any of that go away.

Revenge will never bring you peace.

There can't be peace until there is justice for me, for Antonia...

For all the women you tortured...

And b*rned for centuries!

All to repress a magic that's older and more powerful than your very existence.

Sink all evil. Sink it to the ground thrice.

Marnie, what will this serve?

There are millions of us, more being made every night.

You cannot win.

I'm already dead, vampire.

Thanks to you, I have nothing left to lose.

Incendia of sanctimonia!

Bill!

Sookie! It's still Lafayette!

I can't just stand here and let them die.

Lafayette! No!

Gimme your hands. Now!

I'm sorry, Lafayette.

Spirits who watch over us...

Friends, family, ancestors, guardians of the gates...

Spirits who watch over us...

Friends, family, ancestors, guardians of the gates...

With this rite we evoke thee...

Through the veil of Samhain , we call thee forth.

We evoke thee...

Through the veil of Samhain , we call thee forth.

Spirits who watch over us, friends, family, ancestors, guardians of the gates.

Eric, Bill, don't you die on me.

Marnie...

Marnie.

My sister.

You came back to me. I knew you would.

Antonia, no!

All creatures have their purpose, even vampires.

How can you say that? They m*rder*d us!

Their cruelty served its purpose... to bring you and I together.

And now I am here to take you home.

I'm not finished yet.

Oh, yes, you are.

Gran?

Holy Goddess.

Holy sh*t.

Lafayette!

I don't want to go. I am not ready. Please.

I was trapped between worlds for 400 years.

Lost and driven mad by my rage.

I do not want that for you.

And what about what I want?

Nobody cares what I want!

All my life, I've been afraid. And who wouldn't be?

With dead people murmuring in my ears...

Who are making me deliver your messages!

Making me into a freak!

A creepy, pathetic, terrified mess, muttering to herself in the corner.

But that is not who you are anymore.

No. That's right. I'm not afraid anymore.

I've got real power now.

And you want to take that away from me?

You want them to win?

Oh, Marnie.

Marnie, can't you see? Life is pain.

But soon all you have suffered and feared will be meaningless.

You will be at peace. But them...

They'll be stuck here. Forever.

And there is no victory in that.

That's right, honey! Let it all out...

'Cause there's no room for that where we're goin'.

Oh, this f*ckin' sucks.

Change is hard.

Well...

Gran?

Please don't go.

I have to, dear.

I'm so lost without you. I don't know what to do.

Yes, you do. Answer's where it always is...in your heart.

Bein' alone, it ain't nothin'

to be afraid of, my Sookie.

We're all alone at the end.

Lafayette. Lafayette, can you hear me?

Bitch, talk to me.

Mmm.

You're okay. You're gonna be okay.

Excuse me.

We're feeling a little crispy up here.

Okay, ya know, I'll bus the tables, pour the drinks...

Serve the food and take out the damn garbage.

You know, no problem!

'Cause, you know, clearly, I'm the only one who works here anymore. Flaky skanks.

Oh Lord, ain't you a sight for sore eyes.

Oh God. This is a dream.

This ain't real.

Okay, wake up, Arlene. Okay...

Wake up. Ow.

Ain't gonna hurt you, cher .

I loved you, me.

You and our baby.

Oh God...

♪ God said out and

the devil he ran

♪ Ain't comin' back

no more no more ♪

"Praise Jesus."

I'm here to warn you, girl.

That man, he's bringin'

trouble of the worst kind.

Terry?

Mmm-hmm.

No.

He's good to me and my babies.

I've met the ghosts of his past.

But, they ain't gonna rest forever.

Arlene!

Run.

What's goin' on?

Hear me? Run![/i]

You all right? Jesus. Oh God.

Oh! Somethin' scare ya?

Shhh.

Terry's here now. Ain't nothin' gonna get ya.

♪ Little girl little

girl don't you lie to me

♪ Tell me where did

you sleep last night

♪ In the pines

in the pines

♪ Where the sun don't ever shine[/i]

I ain't got no candy!

The little shits egged my house again.

I will arrest you!

♪ Little girl little girl

don't you lie to me ♪

Jason? What happened to your face?

Is this another dream?

'Cause if Hoyt pops out from under that hood, I'm gonna knock him the f*ck out.

You told him?

Yeah, I told him.

He took it pretty well.

Did you hurt him?

I didn't touch him.

Invite me in.

I don't want to be your girlfriend.

What?

I just got out of a serious relationship.

Mmm...

My first and only relationship. I just...

I'm not ready to commit to you.

Okay. Okay, uh...

Kinda wish you would have told me that, before I took an ass-kickin'.

I didn't ask you to do that.

No? But it was the right thing to do.

And since when is, is Jason Stackhouse concerned with doin' the right thing?

You don't know me very well.

Fair enough. I'm just barely gettin' to know myself.

But I don't want to hurt you, the way I hurt Hoyt.

So I'm asking you, can this be enough for now?

'Cause...'cause I don't want it to stop.

Uh-huh. You know what you are?

You're dangerous.

Yes... I am.

Where the f*ck is he!

I don't know. But Sookie called looking for him.

Sookie...

I'm so over Sookie and her precious fairy vag*na and her unbelievably stupid name!

f*ck Sookie!

I've been with Eric over 100 years.

I've watched him seduce supermodels and princesses and...

Spit out their bones when he is finished.

How can someone named Sookie take him away from me?

Don't f*ckin' touch me.

Try and get some rest.

I k*lled him.

No, you didn't. It wasn't you.

You hear me, Lafayette? None of this was your fault.

I f*ckin' love you...

We're gonna get through this sh*t together, just like we got through everything else.

Okay?

I'll be right out there if you need me.

Does it hurt?

If you want us to stop...

No.

Okay...

I think that's enough.

You saved my life.

Both our lives.

It was my turn.

Thank you.

You don't have to thank me. I can't imagine a world without you in it.

Both of you.

I can't stand this anymore.

It's like being ripped in half.

No matter what I do, somebody I love gets hurt.

Sookie, I just want for you to be happy.

And if being with Eric is what makes you happy...

Then you have my blessing.

See?

It's okay, Sookie. Bill's fine with it.

Bill had his chance. He blew it.

He, he lied to you.

To protect me.

And I lied to him to protect you...

And you've lied to both of us so many times, we can't count.

What a mess.

I forgive you.

I know you've loved me every bit as much as I've loved you.

And we've both hurt each other just as deeply.

I hope you can forgive me.

Sookie.

Like I have a choice.

You're the love of my life.

I know. And that just makes this harder.

If I'm really honest, it wasn't just goofy, innocent Eric I fell for.

As vicious and untrustworthy as you can be...

There's a goodness in you that breaks my heart...

Because a part of me has always wanted you.

You won't be sorry.

I already am.

The time we had together was unforgettable, but it, it's over.

No, wait. It doesn't have to be.

There is only one way I see this ending...

And it's me walking away with neither of you.

Don't do this.

Sookie.

This is the hardest decision I've ever had to make...

But I know it's the right one for all of us. And so, please...

Don't try to stop me, either of you.

Jesus? Is that you?

Oh, f*ck, baby.

Look at you. Look what I, I did. I'm... I'm sorry.

Don't worry about it.

What you mean, don't worry about it? I k*lled you.

Everything's temporary.

Anyway, I probably would have gotten cancer...

d*ed in a bed somewhere with a nurse who doesn't know half the sh*t I know.

Screwing up my IV's and giving me bedsores.

I'm cool with how things went.

But I sure the f*ck ain't. I m*rder*d the man I love.

How am I supposed to live with that?

Just keep breathing, baby.

It's that simple.

Mmm.

Jesus, wait. Don't leave me.

Dude, I'm dead. You're a medium.

I'll always be with you.

Miss Cleary.

Happy Halloween, Sheriff Bellefleur.

Andy.

Sorry about the last time when I took your flowers.

Mmm. That's okay. You were nervous.

No, I was a drug addict... V.

thought I needed it to do the job and to talk pretty ladies like you...

So, I didn't feel like a loser all the time. It worked for awhile...

Then it didn't.

Okay, look, honey.

You're really sweet and everything, but...

This is all just too much for me right now.

It's no problem. Lot of baggage, I get it.

I just wanted to say that I'm sober, and I'm lonely.

And I can be good to someone, if they let me.

'Night.

Sheriff Andy. How about a hug?

I could really, really use one tonight.

You sure I can't convince you to stay?

Tempting, but I don't really think Emma's ready for that.

Oh. So I'm going to take her home and put her to bed.

Okay.

You and Emma are the best thing...

Don't jinx it.

So now you're superstitious?

I just, feel like...

If we are too cute and cheesy...

That God is gonna drop a brick on our heads.

Listen, I think life is violent.

And cruel by nature...

So, when something good comes along, you gotta stop and celebrate it.

Be grateful.

Okay. Well, in that case, you're welcome.

So are you.

Great. Good night.

You're really leavin'?

Yup.

You know, if you didn't like it, I can take direction.

No. I liked it.

I liked it a lot.

And maybe, uh...

Next time we could try oral.

Uh, you know, Hoyt was kind of shy about that, but...

I think maybe

'cause of my fangs.

Yeah, I'm, I'm down for that. Just uh...

Jess, could we stop talkin'

about Hoyt so much?

Yeah, sorry. Sorry, it's just all that I got to compare this to.

Uh...

f*ck.

Do you think there's a part of me that's, that's missin'?

Is that why you don't want to stay?

What... No. Why would you ask me that?

Uh...it's just somethin' Hoyt said.

Thought we weren't talkin' about him anymore.

Hey.

Yeah?

You're funny...

And you're excitin', and you have...

The sexiest hip bones I've ever seen.

I'm leavin' 'cause f*cking you made me hungry.

And I don't want to drink your blood,

'cause I'm not ready to be that intimate with you...

At least not yet.

So you're gonna glamour some total stranger and drink their blood?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay. I get it.

You know, it's, it's, it's kinda like a hooker with kissin'.

Not that you're like a hooker.

Oh, well, maybe I could pretend to be.

If you like that.

Hmm?

You're like no other woman I've ever been with.

And I have been with a lot of women.

Oh God, that's so sweet.

I'm sorry. I uh... Low blood sugar.

I'll see you around.

Well, I knew you'd be back.

Reverend Newlin.

Trick or treat.

When'd this happen?

Last night, the night before. I don't remember. I'm sorry, boss.

It's like somebody hit delete in my brain. Wait...

f*ck, you've been glamoured.

Why would a vamper want to glamour me?

Or dig a hole in the damn parking garage?

Miss Flanagan, we've been expecting you.

Hi, Nan. And gay stormtroopers.

Perfect. Two birds, one stone.

The Marnie situation has been resolved, if that makes any difference.

Ding dong, the witch is dead. Yippee.

His Majesty showed great leadership in extremely perilous circumstances.

You should be kissing his ring.

Why bother when your tongue's already so far up his ass?

I wish for one f*cking night...

You could experience the litany of bullshit I've had to deal with.

Then you'd have some idea of...

How little I give a f*ck about your small town witch infestation.

Or your whole backwoods kingdom, for that matter.

As someone who cares so little, you seem awfully pissed off.

Do I, Bill? Maybe that's because I quit my f*cking job!

You quit the AVL?

And the Authority.

No one quits the Authority.

Quit, fired, same difference.

We assumed we were the ones to be terminated.

Oh, there's been an order issued on your heads.

My last duty was supposed to be delivering the true death to both of you.

Of course, I realized I'd be next.

I have been alive for 816 years.

I refuse to be retired like a fat first wife.

Let me make sure I've got this straight.

You're mutinying against the American Vampire League and the Authority?

And you expect us to join you?

We won't be alone.

There are factions inside the regime who have never been completely on board...

With the current agenda.

Sheriff Northman knows what I'm talking about.

What's in it for us?

Aside from surviving the night?

How about your little fairy waitress?

Oh, come on. The mind reading, the microwave fingers?

You didn't think I knew what she was?

There are at least a couple of thousand vampires...

Who would do almost anything to get a taste of her blood.

Go ahead. She belongs to neither of us.

She smells fantastic, but that's hardly worth dying for.

You're bluffing.

I saw the way you both looked at her.

Hungry puppy dogs, slobbering over the same juicy bone.

You f*cking...

We are not f*cking puppy dogs!

What a bitch.

Tara? You still awake?

Tara?

Debbie?

What are you doin'?

I should have done this a long time ago.

Sookie!

Tara!

No!

Oh, no. Please don't.

Please don't k*ll me. Please. Wait, no!

Tara, Tara.

Tara. Oh God, Tara, no!

Tara, no!

Please, somebody help!

Please. Somebody please help us!

Oh God. Oh God. Somebody!