03x02 - Louie Louie

Previously, on "Being Mary Jane"...

Mary Jane: [gasping]

[brakes screeching]

You're at Southern Regional Hospital.

You've been in a car accident.

I should be thanking you.

There's no telling how long they would have left me in that hallway, if you hadn't said something.

It's my fault you're here in the first place.

You had alcohol in your system. You need to call your lawyer.

Tracy's in county lock-up. Bail's set at $3,000.

We're gonna have some fun till mommy comes home.

When is she coming home?

This should help ease your pain.

It isn't a lot considering it's hush money.

$100,000 and you sign today.

Why'd they even bring up your alcohol level in the first place?

They're trying to get rid of me.

Listen, we provided her with the best plastic surgeon in the country, a cost that we didn't put on her tab, so...

I'd say we're pretty supportive and we look forward to her return when she's ready.

[speaking Spanish]

Mary Jane's doctor says she'll be good to go in three weeks.

Let's see how she heals first, before we commit to a timetable... or at least until we complete our investigation.

It's a standard practice in situations like these where alcohol is proven to be involved.

Even when the alcohol was provided by SNC?

SNC ain't feelin' me? That's cool.

I've given them the best journalism.

After years, SNC should be kissing my ass begging me to come back!

We're talking about your client possibly having a drinking problem.

Easy there, Sy.

We're walking into slanderous territory now.

Not when it's true.

I need to talk to Roy and make sure he doesn't cave to that... oh!

You're the ones that sent her the champagne.

Congratulations, Mary Jane. Remember?

But it's not just champagne.

Mary Jane Paul keeps a bottle of tequila in her desk and she likes to knock back a few drinks before she leaves the office.

SNC cameras recorded everything.

Um... oh, uh, rice, rice!

We need... we need rice! Yeah, we need rice.

Mary Jane helped build this network's reputation, okay?

She works harder than anybody here.

Now you're really gonna put your star anchor through an internal investigation?

I mean, she is the new face of this network.

Right, and being the face of the network comes with responsibilities.

Page 28 of her contract specifies that any instances of moral turpitude which can harm the network's reputation are grounds for termination.

But we're sure you reminded her of that.

Okay, let's all just take a step back here for a second.

There's no need to throw the "t" word around.

It's not necessary, okay?

[clearing throat]

Listen... I know you're fighting for your client and that's admirable, but if you wanna fight hard for someone, you don't the middle-aged Black woman with an attitude and a drinking problem, okay?

They're not worth the risk.

What is she worth to you, Sy?

We wait.

The lady on YouTube said we have to soak the phone in the ricefor 24 hours.

So, we just wait.

[doorbell ringing]

Good morning, Miss Paul.

I know it's improper to stop by unannounced and for that I'm really sorry, but, uh, I had to speak to you.

How did you get my address, um...

Cece.

Cece. Cece, oh... Wow, I must have been really dizzy after the accident.

I don't usually use checks from my personal account.

Well, it happens.

[laughs] Uhhuh.

You're lookin' well, though.

Thank you.

It's what a girl with holes in her face loves to hear.

So, what brings you by?

Well, a few days ago, I was at SNC discussing my settlement...

Why were you even talking to them?

I have, uh, your lab reports after the accident.

How did you get those?

Well, I know a nurse badly in need of a Celine purse, so I just made a contribution to her endeavor.

[laughs] Listen, um...

[winces] Ooh.

It's, um, kinda warm out here. Can... can I come inside and we talk?

Yeah, come in. You can go out to the patio.

It's cooler out there.

Oh. All right then.

Oooh.

Vilma? Vilma?

Si. Si.

Where's... where's Louie?

I put in the hall closet.

Why would you put it in the closet?

Because you said clean. I clean.

Yeah, clean, but don't move Louie.

[taps bat]

Hey, I get it.

Single lady, livin' all alone, can't take a chance.

Well, I want you to know I'm a classy lady of the highest order.

No need for the Louisville Slugger.

I still may need this Louisville Slugger.

What do you want?

To help you out of your dilemma, Miss Paul.

May I...

No. No. Only guests sit.

What dilemma?

Well, we need to help each other 'cause with this lab report and this check, you're startin' to look like you're responsible for that accident.

I wasn't drunk.

You were the one who jumped the light and made the left.

That's not what your check says.

Now you wrote in the memo line: I'm sorry.

I think any court would conclude that you're sorry for runnin' into me... and that's an admission of guilt.

How much to get you out of my house and back to the bowling alley, hm?

Just $25,000.

Twenty-five thousand?

Are you... for a piece of paper?

Oh, baby, you need to use your Obamacare and get your head checked.

You signed the non-disclosure, right?

You can't sue, okay? So, thank you for stopping by and take your happy ass outta my house.

You're absolutely correct.

By signing the non-disclosure, it forestalled me from pursuing any legal action against SNC.

But now you, Miss Paul, that's a different story.

See, I read the entire document and, um, there was no mention of you.

The non-disclosure... it doesn't protect you, it protects them.

Now let's just say some... some evidence were to pop up...

[laughing]

Maybe the results of your lab reports.

That leaves you vulnerable to a civil lawsuit.

Let me show you this document.

Check out page four...

Yeah, I can read. Thank you.

Cecilia: [clearing throat]

White folks are something else, ain't they?

[laughs]

But there's always a blessing in any situation...

[sighing]

...and you are mine.

Oh, I'm your blessing.

Okay, I am so curious. Please continue.

I was at a trying time in my life, you know?

I was in a place of despair and bewilderment.

Just when I thought God had forsaken me, you crashed into my car.

I didn't think anything of it at first.

In fact, it wasn't until SNC made me an offer to make me go away that I even realized this accident is my blessing.

You, Miss Mary Jane Paul, you're my blessing.

And I am very grateful.

Okay, um, it's obvious that you have completely lost your natural-born mind, so, if you just leave now, I will give you a head start before I call the police.

You call the cops... and there will be consequences.

What consequences?

They're gonna ask me questions as to why I'm still interested in you after the accident, and being a woman of moral fiber, I will dispose the truth of our relationship... that you, Miss Mary Jane Paul, news anchor, had alcohol in your system when you crashed into my car, and when this information hits the media world, and it will, woo, it's gonna be a pretty hard mess to clean up.

And judging by how hard you got that maid of yours in there working, I can see you don't like to clean.

Now I have information that can help SNC or it can help you.

I'd rather keep our dollar in the Black community.

I know you feel me. I know you do.

♪ They say I'm different ♪
♪ 'Cause I eat chitlins ♪
♪ Mm, I can't help it ♪
♪ I was born and raised on 'em ♪
♪ That's right ♪
♪ Every mornin' ♪
♪ I'd have to slop the hogs ♪
♪ And they'd be ♪

Gettin' off humpin' ♪
♪ To John Lee Hooker ♪

♪ They say I'm different ♪
♪ 'Cause I'm ♪
♪ A piece of sugar cane ♪
♪ And when I kick my legs... ♪

Cecilia's voice: This can be painless... $25,000 in cash and I'm a distant memory.

Mary Jane's voice: I need to think about it.

♪ ...moonshine to BB King ♪
♪ And Jimmy Reed ♪
♪ Rock on now ♪

Cecilia's voice: I'll get back for your answer tomorrow around 5:00 p.m. sharp.

Good day to you now.

♪ They say I'm different ♪
♪ And that's why... ♪

Uh, Greg, hey, I'm glad you're here.

I think I have a way to perk Ted up and get that vacant look out of his eye.

I do, too. We're replacing him.

What? I was half joking. He's not that bad.

The brass doesn't want not that bad.

They want the next best thing to Mary Jane, an African-American female... to be exact.

The overnight ratings came in and we dipped sharply.

The network wants to stay in front of this.

Okay, whoa, whoa, whoa.

You don't think we're overreacting just a little to the numbers?

I mean, you know how fickle the audience can be.

Kara, I have my orders.

Ted is out. Find a replacement.

Hello? Hey, Roy?

Roy: [on phone] Yeah. Yeah. I'm here, Mary Jane.

I have to put you on speaker. I'm having some phone issues.

Roy: Yeah, no problem. Listen, I've got Arthur here with me.

Uh, how are you holding up?

Well, that depends on what SNC says.

Mary Jane, they wanna hold out a little longer than we'd like.

Uh, they feel terrible, but...

Mary Jane: How long?

They won't commit to a time.

Mary Jane: They won't commit?

Why won't they commit?

Look, what does that even mean?

The doctor said I'll be ready in three weeks.

I'm healing. I'm gonna be ready.

Arthur: Okay, Mary Jane, Arthur.

This may actually be a good thing.

How, Arthur? Without a firm date, we lose momentum.

Or you're creating more of a buzz.

Ever since your "Ugly Black Woman" commentary created a feeding frenzy, right, your TVQ ratings shot up ten points and that's before the "Prime Time" job was offered.

Look, the fans want you back on air ASAP, but... but the longer you make them wait, the greater their appetite is gonna be for you.

Well, is it still gonna say "Prime Time with Mary Jane Paul" behind my fill-in?

Arthur: Uh, no, it'll just say "Prime Time," but don't worry, okay?

Oh, I guess I could use this time to... relax and catch up on some reading.

That is great, Mary Jane. Listen, we will call as soon as we hear anything.

Oh, Arthur, wait, um, I have a question about my accident.

Sure, what's up?

Is there any way, you know, like... down the line, in the future, that I... might be... financially responsible for the accident?

Mary Jane, that's all been taken care of, okay?

The lady signed the non-disclosure, she took her check. It's over, okay? Relax.

Well, uh, what if my blood results got leaked?

You have a signed non-disclosure, okay, and even if you didn't, without admission of guilt, you're fine.

So, do me a favor... stop digging in the bottom of the "what if" barrel and get some rest, okay? I've gotta go.

Thanks, Arthur. Mary Jane?

Mary Jane?

[dial tone]

She hung up.

It's been 13 years since the historic Memorandum of Understanding was signed between the multi-ethnic media coalition and the top television broadcast networks.

All right, okay. What organization are you with again?

National Council of La Raza.

Oh, yeah, you're the organization that grades the networks with color charts like we're in kindergarten.

[laughing]

We just wanna make sure everyone, no matter race, gender, or sexual orientation has a seat at the table.

And by everyone, you mean Latin people.

The Latino population has grown considerably and our organization wants to make sure that someone within the network represents our interests.

Well, we have representation here... Kara Lynch, and she's Latino.

[chuckles]

[sighing]

Something amuses you, Mr. Casales?

That you tout your one and only Latin as progress.

The truth is, SNC lags behind its competitors in terms of both Latino on-air staff and adequate coverage of Latino issues.

Now we're two weeks away from submitting our diversity report for the quarter and we'd hate to see SNC get an "F."

Great.

Let's go. Pass! Pass! Get that ball passed quicker!

Move it along, move it along. I need a snap pass, let's go.

Come on, get the ball out there quick, let's go.

Get down here. Get down.

All right, D'Asia, today, you gotta remember, baby. You gotta remember.

Right hand, left foot. There you go. Oh, beautiful. Beautiful. Perfect.

Just like your daddy, unh! Good.

[laughing] You wish.

Hey, doll. Hey, you made it on time.

Mommy!

Hi, baby!

I told you, Daddy, she wasn't gonna miss my practice.

You did. [laughs]

You know, baby, I used to play basketball.

A two-time state champ in high school.

[grunt of effort]

It's all about the follow through.

Your mama was money from 20 feet out.

What's that?

Oh...

Hey, hey, we got a little straggler here..

Young lady... we're still practicing.

Come on, D'Asia, girl, remember to follow through with your jump shot.

D'Asia, good. Opposite hand, opposite foot.

She's getting so big so fast.

Yeah and with an appetite to match.

Both: [laughing]

I was worried I wasn't gonna make it on time.

I had to take three buses to get here.

Oh, what time's your curfew?

I have to be in by 7:00, not a second late.

Oh, well, that doesn't give you a lot of time.

Not like it's right up the highway.

I also have to take a drug counselling class.

But without a car, I'm not so mobile now.

I don't know if I'm even gonna make her first game.

Oh, you can't miss that.

Um, maybe, uh, I can pick you up so you can be here on time.

Yeah.

Oh, D'Asia, all right, remember... remember, follow through.

Yeah, exactly like your father said.

Patrick: That's good, baby, good.

What about my money market account?

Jerry [on phone]: It would take at least two days to get the funds released, plus, you would have to pay the penalty for early withdrawal.

Of course, there's a penalty for early withdrawal.

Okay, um...

Let me tell you what... so, why don't you just give me five grand.

Jerry: Please tell me it's not shoes.

Not shoes.

[cell phone beeping]

Jerry, I've gotta take this call, but how soon can you message me the money tomorrow?

It'll be there before sundown.

Thanks.

[cell phone beeps]

Kara, what's shakin'?

Kara: Ted is out and they want me to find a replacement.

Mary Jane: It doesn't make any sense.

You just need a warm body in the chair until I get back.

What's the emergency?

Kara: Apparently, we dipped a bit in the overnights and now it's DEFCON 5 all of a sudden.

Mary Jane: Who do they want?

Kara: The next best thing to you... or at least someone that looks like you.

Mary Jane: Oh, God, they're trying to get rid of me, aren't they?

Kara: Stop, okay, don't... don't panic.

Mary Jane: Oh, my God.

Kara: Sit tight. Sit tight.

Mary Jane: Oh, my God.

Kara: Have you eaten, 'cause I can stop by the soul food place and pick you up a little something.

Mary Jane: Fried chicken, yeah, and pancakes from that spot across the street.

Oh, and red beans and rice and sausage from, um, Fred's on Peachtree, okay?

[doorbell ringing] MARY JANE: And pizza, yeah, pizza.

And a 7-Up cake from Jimmy's.

Kara: What?

Mary Jane: They'll know what I'm talking about.

So, I'm just supposed to act like I don't know what's going on.

I'm just supposed to stay home and relax while they try to replace me with random Black women.

It's like... like what I do doesn't require a skill, like we're just... interchangeable.

We're all just freakin' interchangeable, you know, like... like "insert Negro girl here, add water and stir."

Interchangeable!

And, Greg, that balding sow, never did like me.

He never did. And I swear to God, if I wasn't afraid of prison, I would go down there and I would just bash his frickin' face in!

Okay.

[sighing]

Okay.

I don't know if it's the pain pills or... the food or... the pain pills I took with the food, um, I just...

I just feel like I'm losing right now, you know?

Why is this happening to me, Kara?

Why? Why? I did everything right.

I don't know about that.

I have started to do everything right, I mean.

God, I've cut people out of my life, right?

Yes.

I focused on my career.

God, I was happy. I was really happy, you know?

After the whole David thing, I... I just...

It felt so good to be wanted and appreciated by SNC.

You know, I'm not gonna lie. Not gonna front.

I needed that validation, you know?

I really did and then, bam, the whole Lisa/David bullshit.

It's like everything I have fought for and sacrificed for is just evaporating right in front of my eyes.

No.

And... and why?

Because I have a stupid freakin' scar on my face.

It's not... it's not fair, Kara. It's not fair.

I...I earned the right to be anchor of "Prime Time."

I freakin' earned that.

I lost my... my best friend. I lost my man.

I cannot lose my job, Kara.

Stop. Stop.

That's not gonna happen, okay? Please.

I do admit that ushering in direct competition at your network, not a good look.

You think?

Now, this Marc Lamont, he's getting a lot of attention.

How about I pitch him filling in for you?

No.

Why not?

I'm not gonna do it.

What?

I'm not gonna do it.

We are gonna give them what they want.

Hire a Black woman.

Not a cute Black woman.

We're going to find an actual ugly Black woman, like a really ugly Black woman.

Are you high?

No, I'm serious.

Okay, MJ, what exactly are you talking about here?

Oh, God, don't make me spell it out.

No, you're gonna have to spell this out because, first of all, it starts out with racist and it ends with highly offensive.

It's how they see us anyway... ugly, worthless, replaceable.

I say give the people what they want.

MJ, just...

No, no, trust me.

This is a great idea, right? It's perfect.

Since the job is already temporary, you sell it as an amazing opportunity for the facially-challenged to get a shot at broadcast, right?

That gesture is then seen as SNC not being about image, but about substance.

Boom, the network gets amazing press, huge publicity for breaking the "pretty" barrier, right?

That generates more awareness for the show just in time for a fresh-faced Mary Jane to reappear and claim her rightful place as anchor of "Prime Time," right, huh, huh?

You keep the... the new hire around.

You let her fill in every so often.

Two Black women have jobs and all is right with the world.

Okay, this, right here, is even crazy for your ass.

Honey, you have hitched your wagon to me, so if I'm out of "Prime Time," oh, baby, we are out of "Prime Time." Bye-bye big check.

Hello, regional news. So...

How ugly do you want her?

Fugly.

Child 1: Get it! Get it!

Child 2: Don't shoot it past.

I wish you would have told me to wear something orange.

Well, don't worry about that, okay? It's fine.

Yeah, but I wish I was wearing the team colors like everyone else.

Hey.

Hey, Dad. Hey, Mama.

Helen: Hey, baby.

Patrick: Hey, sweetie.

Helen: Patrick. Does Tracy's probation officer know where she is?

Mama, play nice now.

I'm just asking a question.

Yes, they know where I am, Mrs. Patterson.

I have to get approval to come here.

Well, as long as the authorities know where you are.

We don't want any drama, you know, that upsets the family or... or D'Asia.

Mama.

Spectators: [cheering]

You got it, baby.

Go, go, go!

Spectators: [cheering]

That's great, baby, yeah.

Great job with D'Asia.

Oh.

Looks like the practicing paid off.

I know, right.

We know where she gets the talent from.

Oh, thank you ladies.

Actually, I'm the one that won two championships playing basketball.

Hi, I'm Tracy, D'Asia's mom.

Oh, nice to meet you.

Girl, relax. People didn't know.

Well, maybe had you introduced me.

I just want everyone to know where she gets her talent from because it's not you or your family.

That gift came from me.

Okay, fine.

Stop making a scene.

Spectators: [shouting]

[cheering]

[whistle shrills]

Foul, number 31.

There we go. All right.

All right, baby, you got it. You got this.

Follow through. Follow through.

Go. Get it, sweetie.

Come on, D'Asia.

Tracy: You go, girl, D'Asia!

Helen: You can do it.

[whistle shrills]

Yes!

Spectators: [cheering, applauding]

Get it, girl. Get in there.

Patrick: [laughing]

Damn it, Patrick, it's 4:20... I have to go.

Why don't you just take my car, then you can stay an extra ten minutes before leaving, okay?

Tracy: I...

I can't. My license was suspended.

I like to see my grandbaby play.

You gonna be all right?

Hey, Patrick, those chili Fritos are not agreein' with my stomach.

You gotta take over for a second.

Okay. All right, coach.

She's wonderful, isn't she?

Patrick: All right, team, let's go, let's go!

Look, there has to be a coach.

I mean, I guess somebody has to be the responsible adult, right?

What are you doing? Don't you have somewhere to go?

I'm just a junky thief, right?

I smoked all that crack by myself, huh?

Come on, baby, get back on offense.

Why don't you just knock it off and get outta here?

Patrick, I blew people to make money to support us and now I don't belong?

Ignore me if you want, but whatever you think of me, you're the same.

And no matter how much money your family has, you're still an addict.

Spectators: [cheering, shouting]

[whistle shrills]

[silently] Yeah.

I did everything you told me to do.

I explained how we can use the ugly Black woman momentum while you're sidelined to bolster some talented, non-threatening candidate and Greg does what he always does.

He just frickin' switched it up on me.

I just don't get it.

It's like they don't care that they're alienating the viewers.

I'm... I'm concerned.

Can you please put that bat down?

My gosh.

Who'd they get?

They got her.

A Latina?

Mm-hm.

They wanna put JLo Junior in my chair?

Oh, baby, I'm not worried at all.

Really? You are not worried because have you frickin' looked at this girl?

I mean, she's hot.

I mean, if I had a "lick her" license, I would totally be into that.

If you chiseled off all that Maybelline off her face, you couldn't even tell which race she is.

She's all make-up and no substance.

Why, because she's beautiful and young, she's not qualified?

Okay.

Oh, she's done news four years and has anchored twice.

All make-up, no substance.

Well, you've gotta start somewhere, chickie.

Baby, she is the dress that you... you buy and wear once and then take back to the store the next day.

She's a return item.

[knocking at door]

Hopefully.

Hey.

Hey.

[laughs]

Kara: Who's this?

She is here to pick up my iPhone.

Yeah, she works for one of those you break it, we fix it mobile services.

Oh.

And since my car is trashed, she is here.

That's unique.

Yeah, I can fix anything.

Yeah.

Oh. Do you have a business card?

Well, yeah, you know, she has a card and a "lick her" license.

Oh.

Yeah. Mm-hm.

Oh.

I'm outta cards, but I'm sure Miss Paul can give you my information.

Okay. - Mm-hm.

That'd be great.

Well, out you go.

Got a show to produce.

I absolutely do. It was nice meeting you.

Oh, nice meeting you.

Good luck.

Thank you.

You, too.

"Lick her" license?

Hm...

Where's my money?

Okay, so here's the deal.

I have a messenger en route with $5,000 in cash and if you're cool with that amount, then we've got a deal.

That's not the number we discussed.

Well, that's all I can afford, so...

This is your house, right?

[laughing]

Yes, okay, I have expensive taste, Cece, but I also have to take care of my... my drug addict brother, my sick mother, my... my niece, her two kids.

Cece, you're just gonna have to get in line because I don't have $25,000 to give you, okay?

I have $5,000, so... deal with it.

Okay. All right.

$25,000 is my blessing.

So here's what's gonna happen.

I know you get paid every two weeks, so... you are gonna pay me, every two weeks, $5,000 in cash until I get back to my blessing.

I just told you everything I have to deal with and you still wanna extort me?

It's the best I can do.

So, now you deal with it.

Thank you.

The messenger's stuck in traffic.

Oh. I see you're readin' WEB Du Bois.

What do you know about Du Bois? [laughing]

What do I know?

A hell of a lot more than you do.

Hm...

I promise you that.

I bet you don't even know what the "W", the "E" or the "B" stand for.

William Edward Burghardt. Don't try me.

You're not gonna extort me and insult my intelligence.

I'm not trying to insult your intelligence.

I'm just questioning your choice of reading material.

Are you gonna go there with me?

[laughing] Bring it.

Oh, it's already been broughten.

Greg's voice: Look, Kara, I know you're in Mary Jane's corner, but you need to make sure Marisol is ready to go.

Kara's voice: Greg, of course.

I am a professional, okay? All good.

Greg' voice: Great. I just wanna make sure we're all on the same page.

Kara's voice: We are.

See, we are dealing with the push-button generation.

Instant gratification is America's newest export.

All right, these kids these days, the only thing they're bringing to the table is expectations and entitlement, that's it, and that's a direct result of the culture.

Well, that'd sound great in a term paper.

But the truth is centuries of slavery followed by systematic terrorism, discrimination, segregation and so on, now that's what impedes the Black man from his success.

Excuses.

Excuses! That's all it is.

Okay, yes, I will be the first to admit that there are countless atrocities in our past...

Mm-hm. Mm-hm.

...that have prevented us from competing, truly competing on a level playing field. I will give you that.

However, can we both be honest here?

Some of us are just... lazy.

Okay, there, I said it. Some of us are just lazy.

That was actually quite freeing.

You should say it with me.

Oh, yeah, lazy Negro, lazy Negro.

[chomping popcorn]

It's easy to criticize when you've made it.

Unh-unh, you're not gonna put that on me.

No, sir.

Cece, that's you.

That's all you. Yeah.

Because instead of figuring out how to make your own money, oh, it's just easier to take mine...

'cause you're lazy.

You's a lazy-ass Negro, okay?

And... and... and you, like every other warped person, uses religion to lead the charge of their crimes.

Lazy Negro.

Look, this popcorn is salty.

Can I have, uh, another glass of water.

No.

[chomping]

Good evening, I'm Marisol Esparza.

Welcome to "Prime Time."

Mary Jane Paul is still at home recovering and I promise to do my very best to hold down the fort until she returns.

Get well soon, Mary Jane.

Ooh, she's cute.

You can wait in the car.

Don't be mad at me because my eyes work.

...there'll be effective actions on immigration in a speech tomorrow night.

Look at that outfit.

Try and get me to wear that tacky-ass jacket.

Cecilia: Hm, that jacket is even cute.

Fetching.

Did you just say "fetching"?

Cecilia: Yes, as in alluring, attractive, fetching, as in... her jacket is fetching.

[laughing] Hmph.

Listen to her. She's boring. She's like human ambiance.

Why are you assaulting that girl's game?

Assault? What year is this again?

Hm, I didn't know you spoke "deflection."

I am not deflecting, okay?

Remember, she's keeping my chair warm, not the other way around.

I'm not worried.

Well, you should be worried.

The growth of the Hispanic population is changing the face of this country as we speak...

52 million Americans of Latin descent in this country, honey.

In the next 30 years, we're all gonna be wearing cowboy boots and eatin' corn on the cob with mayonnaise.

[laughing]

I'm not worried. Do you know why?

Hablo español.

Please, just because you speaks Spanish don't make you one of them.

[laughing]

Woo, she got you, shook up.

No. No.

I knew it. You know, ain't nothing worse than underestimating your opponent.

SNC treated me like that.

Thinkin' they could buy me.

Well, you cashed the check, so one could conclude that they did buy you.

Oh, funny.

Yeah, but while you standin' here crackin' on old Cece, that pretty Latin honey, she's probably takin' Instagram photos in your chair.

[chuckling]

Ooh.

Yes, Miss Paul, that's the face of the future... right there.

You know something?

If you want your job back, you'd better get up and go get it, 'cause in a minute, you ain't gonna be able to get her outta your chair.

[doorbell ringing]

Okay, it's time for you to go.

[winces] Oh.

Yeah.

♪ When you get the courage ♪
♪ To be honest with yourself ♪
♪ You can stop lyin' ♪
♪ To everybody else ♪
♪ Don't you ever get tired ♪
♪ Of pretending ♪
♪ Tired ♪
♪ Ran so many miles ♪
♪ That your legs gave out ♪
♪ You gotta ask yourself ♪
♪ What are you runnin' from ♪
♪ Look yourself ♪
♪ In the mirror ♪
♪ And say hey who's that there ♪

Hey, son.

Patrick: Hey.

Here to pick up D'Asia?

Yeah, school's tomorrow.

If she doesn't get to bed early, it'll be a long morning.

Oh, Patrick, I didn't know you were here.

I just got some ice cream for the kids. Do you want some?

No, thank you, no. I'm just here for D'Asia.

Oh, thank you, baby.

Hey, you looked good out there with those kids.

It looked like you were havin' fun.

Yeah, I like being on the court coaching, this kinda thing.

I'd like to spend more time with D'Asia, but this job, Lordy.

They've got me on call for 25 lousy hours a week and never tell me when I'm working, so I can't plan my schedule and it's tough finding sitters at the last minute.

Oh, here it comes. Now, Patrick, you know I love my grandbaby. But...

I'm older now and I just don't see myself as a nanny.

I'm not asking you to, mama.

[sighing]

Dad...

You've been asking me for years if I needed help and I've been... too proud to take it, but...

I'm ready for you to actually make that call for me.

I need a job.

Something steady so I can be there for D'Asia and I don't care, really, what it is. I just...

Anything you can do, Dad, would be great.

Paul: Oh... Oh... Oh...

[patting Patrick's back]

Oh... Dad. What?

Are you okay? Are you okay, Dad?

I think I'll join your dad.

He's having an emotional moment.

Oh.

[sighing]

How come you didn't fight Like this for me and Naima?

Huh, what are you talking about?

You weren't there for me and Naima.

You were always gone.. some club, some party, some woman.

You never had time for us.

Somebody's gotta make the money, right? Remember that?

Niecy, come on.

[sighing]

I was going through some problems. You know that.

Yeah, and I watched you struggle... trying to do everything yourself... not asking anybody for anything because you wanted to be independent.

And I remember thinking like, wow, my dad, he may not be rollin', but at least he's trying to make it on his own.

But that turned out to be some BS because now that you're coaching D'Asia, you're suddenly super dad.

No, it's not that.

And you're gonna ask Grandpa for a job so you can be the perfect father for her.

No, it's not...

Me and Naima, we could have used the perfect father, too.

It would've been great.

Welcome.

I'm Mary Jane Paul...

And this is "Prime Time."

Welcome, I'm Mary Jane Paul, and this is "Prime Time."

I'm Mary Jane Paul... and this is "Prime Time."

Welcome...

Welcome...

I'm Mary Jane Paul and this is "Prime Time."


♪ I'm a boss-ass bitch ♪
♪ Bitch bitch bitch ♪
♪ Bitch bitch bitch ♪
♪ I'm a boss-ass bitch ♪
♪ Bitch bitch bitch ♪
♪ Bitch bitch bitch ♪
♪ I'm a boss-ass bitch ♪
♪ Bitch bitch bitch ♪
♪ Bitch bitch bitch ♪
♪ I'm a boss-ass bitch ♪
♪ Bitch bitch bitch ♪
♪ Bitch bitch bitch ♪
♪ I'm a boss-ass bitch ♪
♪ I don't really care ♪
♪ About you ratchet lames ♪
♪ You could check it out ♪
♪ I'm all about fame ♪
♪ Don't need a man ♪
♪ To keep it straight ♪
♪ Get paid ♪
♪ I love money ♪
♪ That's all I gotta say ♪

Kara: Hey, Mary Jane. What are you doing here?

My face is broken, not my ass.

I can still sit in and help write some stories.

Oh, my gosh.
We haven't officially met.

I'm Marisol.

Oh, nice to meet you.

It is such an honor to fill in for you.

[laughing]
Wow, is this your bag?

Um, yes, it is.

Oh, my gosh, fetching.

Here, have a seat.

Oh...

I should get my pad and pen.

Yeah, well, if you need it.

All right, so, what are we workin' on?

♪ 'Cause I'm a boss-ass bitch ♪
♪ Bitch bitch bitch ♪
♪ Bitch bitch bitch ♪
♪ I'm a boss-ass bitch ♪