01x01 - Pilot

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Lethal w*apon". Aired: September 2016 to February 2019.*
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"Lethal w*apon" is based on the action film series of the same name, in which a slightly unhinged cop is partnered with a veteran detective trying to maintain a low stress level in his life.
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01x01 - Pilot

Post by bunniefuu »

♪ ♪

(siren wailing)

(siren wailing)

This was a new jacket! Damn!

My wife's gonna k*ll me.

(g*nf*re continues)

(ringing)

Oh, speak of the devil. Shh.

Hey, honey!

Hey, love.

How's your day going?

Oh, pretty good, you know, just eatin' donuts and writing parking tickets.

How 'bout you?

The uze. Mowing the lawn, making a roast, sleeping with the neighbor.

Oh, that sounds like a relaxing day.

Hey, baby?

Can I call you back later?

Sure, but I may not be available.

I have to swing by the hospital and have this baby.

Wait, what?

Our boy's coming out.

You're gonna be a daddy!

Yeah-ha-ha-ha!

Well, um, um...

What-what... what do you want me to do?

Breathe, baby.

I'll meet you at the hospital.

I love you.

Aw, baby, I love you, too.

♪ ♪

(g*nf*re continues)

Jenkins: The hell you doing?

I'm gonna be a daddy!

I can't go get myself k*lled!

Jenkins: We can't just let them get away.

Riggs: Didn't say anything about letting him get away. Hit the gate.

♪ Down at the station ♪

Jenkins: Damn it, Riggs!

Come on!

They gotta be 800 yards out!

♪ I don't care where it goes ♪

Riggs, there ain't but three sh**t in the whole damn world who can make that sh*t, and you ain't one of 'em!

Hey, Jenkins...

Yeah?

Shut up.

(g*nsh*t)

(tires screeching)

♪ Can't you see ♪
♪ Oh, can't you see ♪

(whoops)

♪ What that woman ♪ Got this?

Go! Yeah!

♪ She been doing to me ♪

(whoops)

♪ Can't you see ♪

(laughs, sirens wailing)

♪ Can't you see ♪

Ooh. Ah...

♪ What that woman... ♪

You're gonna be a bronco, just like your daddy.

(high-pitched whine)

Detective Riggs. ‭Yeah.

There's been an accident.

You need to go to...

(echoing): There's been an accident.

You need to go to...

There's been an accident.

You need to go to...

♪ ♪
♪ ♪

(birds singing)

(beeping rhythmically)

(exhales)

(beeping stops)

Honey...

‭Hmm?

Are you nervous?

Please.

I've been a cop for 22 years.

I'm just excited about getting back to work, that's all.

Roger... you know, you don't have to go back.

What? Hey, what, what, what, what do you mean by this?

I'm just saying, we do all right.

No, you do all right.

Roger. It isn't about the money.

The alternative is what?

Stay home.

Get fat.

Play golf.

I'm already chubby...

Shut up. (laughs)

...I hate golf, and our kids'll be home, right?

Yes.

‭Okay, then I really need to get back to work.

(both laugh)

(sighs)

You know how the doctor said I should avoid stress?

Well... a great way to relieve stress...

Mm-hmm.

...is, um...

Really?

Yeah. It's not, it's not for me. ‭

Oh.

I'll receive zero pleasure.

‭Oh, really?

It's actually for medicinal purposes.

(laughs)

Oh, it's for medicinal purposes?

Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Mm. ‭Technically, it was my 50th like, two weeks ago, and in some cultures, it is actually, like, customary for the wife... ‭Just stop.

This isn't about stress and this isn't about your birthday.

This... is about my husband going back to work to keep our city safe.

Yes!

Don't fist pump.

Don't do... I'm sorry.

No, don't do that. ‭Sorry.

(laughing)

‭Yes. We are...

Oh...

(baby crying)

It's okay. It's okay.

Let her cry.

Roger, stop it.

‭It's okay!

It's good for her lungs.

No, it's not good for her lungs.

She's a singer.

She's cheering for me.

No, it's not healthy.

She's happy for Roger.

Oh, gosh, honey.

(seagulls calling)

♪ ♪

(exhales)

(sizzling)

Okay, here comes that hot, delicious bacon.

Here's Daddy.

Come on, kids. Let's go.

Hey, Murtaugh... be safe out there.

Always.

I love you.

I love you, too.

(phone buzzing)

(phone continues buzzing)

Bang.

Murtaugh! (cheers, applause)

Welcome back, Murtaugh.

Woman: There he is!

Back from the dead.

I was never dead, remember that.

Hey, old man.

Got a sec?

Murtaugh: Sure, Cap.

There he is. ‭Hey, man, what's up?

So, you look good.

Death suits you.

Pocket square come with the promotion?

Bought it with the pay raise.

(snorts)

(both chuckling)

Missed you, partner.

You, too, brother.

Have a seat.

You know, part of me was surprised to see you.

I figured with your wife making a k*lling putting criminals back out on the street...

Look, we have separate accounts.

Relax.

I can appreciate a dual income as much as the next guy.

What...?

This is the most uncomfortable chair I've ever sat in.

It's very expensive, don't break it.

(laughs)

Well, since I have you back, I got you a new partner.

He's a lateral transfer from Texas.

Worked Homicide and Vice.

Name's Martin Riggs.

Also a Navy SEAL w*r hero.

Look, it's my first day back.

I don't want to have to babysit some adrenaline junkie with PTSD.

Just show him around.

This came from the city attorney personally.

(knocking on door)

We got a bank robbery downtown We have hostages.

Hey. Welcome back, Murtaugh.

Thought you were dead.

Not yet.

Get on the floor, now!

(screaming)

Now!

(siren whoops)

Adrian, what's up?

Three armed suspects inside, about 20 hostages, and they b*at up a security guard pretty bad.

Anybody talk to them yet?

‭ADRIAN: They said something about wanting a helicopter.

Yeah, good luck with that.

Let me get you...

‭RIGGS: We should probably get the element of surprise.

Excuse me.

Look, I'm not trying to tell you how to do your job, right?

I'm just saying it's not exactly Ocean's Eleven in there.

Hey, could you get this guy out of here?

Sorry, I didn't...

(g*nf*re)

Where's our chopper?!

Okay, we got sh*ts fired.

Set up mobile command around the block.

Let's go!

All right, Murtaugh.

First day back, baby.

(beeping rapidly)

All right.

(exhaling)

(Riggs whistling)

Hey, we got a... we got a civilian walking towards the bank!

Someone stop him!

He's not a civilian; he's a cop.

New guy. Name's Riggs or something.

Martin Riggs?

(whistling)

Adrian: Yeah. How'd you know?

♪ ♪

(hostages screaming)

Keep your head down! Get down!

Get down, now!

(whistling)

Get down!

Hello, bad guys.

I brought some gifts.

Look, I wasn't sure what everyone liked, so I brought an assortment.

I've got, like, pepperoni...

(woman screams)

We don't want any damn pizza!

We want a chopper!

Look, I'm new to the area, uh, but it seems like you picked a pretty busy intersection for that.

I'm not sure where you'd set a chopper down.

Is this funny to you?

No, not at all.

I just... I think you guys are in over your head.

I mean, look, these guys out here, they're never gonna take you seriously.

Unless...

Unless what?!

You off someone.

Robber: Get down!

Woman: Who is this lunatic?

Murtaugh's new partner.

Teach him that?

I just met that man, okay?

This kind of crazy takes years to develop.

What is going on in there?

Hey, Doc.

Murtaugh's new partner just told them to k*ll a hostage.

Riggs: And it can't just be anyone.

You know, they can't be old or unattractive and, to be frank... and I hate saying this... but white's better.

I'm sorry, it's true, though, right?

More publicity.

Maybe we should just off you!

Ooh! Offing a cop.

Now that would definitely get their attention.

Although, I don't think you guys have the sack for that.

Oh, yeah?

(hostages whimpering)

Either we get out of here alive, or nobody does!

What the hell is he thinking?

He's gonna get himself k*lled.

I think I left some side salads outside.

I'm gonna...

Get your ass down!

Get down!

‭(woman shrieks)

Get down!

Ready to make entry.

We're waiting your command, sir.

Okay.

We're gonna do this.

I'm gonna need you to do me a favor, okay?

Don't miss.

All right, guys, go.

Get your team to the final cover position. Let's go.

One...

Two...

Move, move, move!

Move it up, move it up.

Three.

sh*ts fired!

sh*ts fired!

Spread out, spread out!

(detonator whirs, beeping)

(hostages shouting)

All right, let's go, let's go, let's go.

They got a b*mb!

(panicked shouting)

(indistinct radio chatter)

(shouting quiets)

What the hell are you doing?

Martin Riggs.

We're gonna make a great team.

Three tours overseas.

Bet you saw some pretty intense stuff.

Well, that's all classified.

I wish I could talk about that, though, you know?

But also, you never know who's listening.

Oh, I don't think you're paranoid.

I think you're in pain.

I'm very familiar with this game.

What you don't talk about can't hurt, right?

But I'm the one who I.A. is going to ask if you're field ready, so you're gonna have to.

I'm an open book.

What would you like to discuss?

How about your wife?

Next question.

Okay, but they don't get any easier.

Let's try.

Do you want to die?

Murtaugh: The man wants to die!

Which is fine, his business, but if it was up to me, I'd lock him in a padded white room.

But that's not my area of expertise.

What is my domain is sustaining the life of one Roger Mayfield Murtaugh!

(watch beeping rapidly)

Calm down.

That thing's gonna explode.

(beeping stops)

I.A. is investigating.

But he'll probably be cleared, since the sh*ts were fired from the suspect's w*apon.

You're not seriously considering putting that man back in the field.

It came from upstairs.

Someone's protecting this guy.

‭Who?!

(knocking on door)

We got a DOA in Griffith Park.

Want to give me a ride?

I don't really know my way around.

Sure, Murtaugh can give you a ride.

Is the DOA dead?

"Dead on arrival."

Does it mean something different here?

I just want to make sure there's no one else left for you to k*ll.

Just you and me.

Besides, I.A. confiscated my w*apon until I'm cleared from the bank, so if we gotta k*ll somebody, it's on you, big guy.

♪ ♪

Scorcese. Tell us what's going on.

Oh. Any relation?

I went to film school, wrote a script, so these geniuses all call me Scorcese.

Super creative.

Well, walk us through it, Herr Director.

(Murtaugh chuckles)

Scorcese: Name is Ramon Alvarez.

g*nsh*t wound to the right temple, appears self-inflicted.

Residue on his right hand consistent with the .22 found by his side.

Looks like su1c1de.

He served. ‭Yeah.

He was actually a SEAL.

'06 through '11.

He also has scarring on his wrists.

Might not have been his first attempt.

Murtaugh: Hmm.

Okay. Well, I think we have a pretty clear picture of what happened.

I'll go fill out some paperwork.

Riggs: How'd he get here?

No car, no bike, no bus stop.

Maybe he walked.

He's got silt on the bottom of his boots.

If he'd've walked, it would've come off.

There's none of that around here.

Maybe he Ubered.

Riggs: To k*ll himself?

Come on, seems like a pain in the ass, don't you think?

Wouldn't you just go bang at home?

I wouldn't know.

Lucky you.

Take the body to the morgue.

Push his autopsy to the front of the line.

Hey, hey. What are you doing?

This man served his country.

I'm gonna give him a proper investigation.

(sniffles quietly)

We are very sorry about your loss, Mrs. Alvarez.

He didn't do this.

Do you understand me?

Ma'am, we're exploring all possibilities.

That's why we're here.

We noticed some scarring on your husband's wrists.

That was a long time ago, when he first got home from the w*r.

One day, I came home early from work, and I found him.

In the tub.

But then everything changed.

How so?

Mrs. Alvarez : He found this new job, working security down at the Port of L.A.

He was exercising, he stopped taking his anti-anxiety medicine, Klonopin.

I think he felt like a soldier again.

Mrs. Alvarez, were you guys going somewhere?

(sighs)

Yeah.

Ramon wanted us to start over.

He found us a big house in Arizona.

When were you leaving?

Next week.

Thank you for your time, Mrs. Alvarez.

Lefty, huh?

This your dad's?

You guys play?

We'd play catch sometimes.

Always seemed to make him happy.

I certainly understand k*lling yourself once you've moved to Arizona but seems a little aggressive to do it the week before, no?

If you were gonna k*ll yourself, how would you do it?

Hypothetically.

Pills seem nice, you know?

Drift off, fall asleep.

Then, of course, some idiot pumps your stomach, you wake up, you're in the hospital, you gotta go to work the next day, everybody knows about it, that's humiliating.

I have heard really nice things about drowning, though, you know? ‭No, no, no.

If you were going to sh**t yourself, how would you do it?

May I?

Come on. I'm not gonna do it here, I promise.

First, I'd swing by Home Depot.

Pick up a nice, polyethylene plastic sheet, lay it out nice and neat so as not to make a mess.

Then I'd take my final, last sh*t of Jonathan Daniel's, leave the instructions for my internment and a nice $6,500 check for burial costs.

Actually, things are more expensive out here.

I might need to look into that.

My point was, you'd use your dominant hand.

So why would Alvarez sh**t himself with his right hand if he was lefty?

Maybe he didn't.

Guy wants to get out of town in a week, he's either really excited to get somewhere...

Or he's trying to get away from someone.

Come on.

Where we going?

To find out how a guy who works security can afford a big house in Arizona.

♪ ♪

Man: Hey, hey. What the hell are you doing?

You can't park here.

Detective Murtaugh.

Tight security today?

Sorry, we got the Grand Prix circuit in town.

Been kind of a zoo around here.

Daryl Hennicky.

Run patrol for the docks.

Wait a minute. Isn't that Customs' job?

We just babysit the containers till they process 'em.

And what did Ramon Alvarez do here?

Basic foot patrol.

Didn't know him very well.

He was a good worker.

Showed up on time.

His patrol was right over there, a warehouse belonging to an importer.

You mind?

Nah, go for it.

(Riggs whistling)

Can I help you, gentlemen?

Murtaugh: Yeah. LAPD.

We're here to inform you that one of your co-workers, Mr. Ramon Alvarez, just passed away.

He was a rent-a-cop, not a co-worker.

But I heard he had a young son.

It's a tragedy.

What about him?

He a co-worker?

He's an employee.

Why?

‭I dig his ink.

Recognize it from Texas.

Real big in the Juarez drug dealer set.

You know, maybe I should go say hi.

Go say hi.

I'm gonna go talk to him. Maybe we know some of the same people.

Hey, I haven't given police permission to question my employees.

‭Hey, hey, hey. Hold on, chico.

You don't want us coming back here with warrants and looking through all your cargo.

Hey!

Amigo!

Look, I want to talk to you about Ramon Alvarez.

Hey, look, I know you didn't k*ll him; if you did, he wouldn't have a head, right?

¿No habla inglés?

(speaks Spanish) _

(grunting)

Let him go! Now!

It's okay, guys.

I'm a cop.

Nothing?

Look, I don't have a badge or a g*n or anything, you know.

Had disciplinary issues.

(g*n hammer clicks)

Ah!

Fine.

(grunts)

Ah!

Murtaugh: What kind of credit would I need for that?

I'm about a 528.

Hey, Rog? Rog! Bad guy!

Go! Go!

♪ I'm coming for payback ♪

(tires squealing)

♪ ♪
♪ I'm coming for payback ♪

(exhaling in short bursts)

Come on, come on, let's go, let's go!

♪ My thoughts sicking ♪
♪ All venom, I'm lost in 'em ♪
♪ Ready for w*r ♪
♪ Better pray that the Lord with 'em ♪
♪ My only focus, new vision ♪
♪ My new religion ♪

Go, go, go, go, go!

What did he do?

I asked him about Alvarez.

He took a swing at me.

Hardly incriminating.

I've wanted to take swings at you.

♪ I'm a maniac in the mood for k*lling ♪

(beeping rapidly)

♪ I owe you payback ♪

Would you please go faster? Are you okay?

(beeping stops)

Yeah, I'm fine.

Look, put it in cruise control and slide under...

Get off of me! Get off!

You let me...

(shouting over each other)

Let me drive!

Get your seat belt on!

‭Go!

♪ I'm coming for payback ♪
♪ ♪

(siren wailing)

♪ I'm coming for payback ♪

Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go!

(tires squealing)

♪ I'm coming for payback ♪

(tires screech)

Murtaugh: Whoa!

Where the hell are we?

Riggs: I don't know.

They're going a whole lot faster than we are.

This is the Grand Prix!

Riggs, you mother...

Go, go, go, go, go, go!

♪ Like a sick pleasure, I'm the collector ♪
♪ You're in debt to a win getter ♪
♪ Applying pressure my endeavor ♪
♪ Will end never ♪
♪ You violated it's time ♪

There he is, come on. Get up. Get up close.

♪ I'm a k*lling tool ♪
♪ And offended dude is a big error ♪
♪ A boxing match with a silverback ♪
♪ Would've been better ♪

Get me close. Get me closer.

What are you doing? Get your hand off the wheel!

g*n!

♪ I'm don't feel no feelings now ♪
♪ You are dealing with a super villain ♪
♪ Ain't no holding back, I'm a maniac ♪

(beeping rapidly)

♪ In the mood for k*lling ♪

(beeping stops)

Would you please get me closer?

Closer?

That's not smart! What are you doing?

(tires squeal)

♪ Got my mask on ♪
♪ Wearing all black ♪
♪ Ain't no use to running, better fall back ♪
♪ It ain't over till it's over, there's no way back ♪
♪ I'm coming and I'm gunnin' ♪
♪ Better stay strapped ♪
♪ I'm coming for payback ♪
♪ I'm coming for payback ♪
♪ I'm coming for payback ♪

(grunting)

♪ I'm coming for payback ♪

(Riggs grunting)

♪ Yeah ♪
♪ And I'm coming for it ASAP ♪
♪ I need it and I'm coming to take that ♪
♪ And it ain't a place that you're safe at ♪
♪ You crazy? You know I'll play that... ♪
(groans)

Hey.

You all right?

Uh, yeah. I think so.

Uh, bad guy.

Getting away. (grunts)

LAPD! Put your hands in the air!

Do it now! Don't...

(horn blares)

Huh.

(panting)

What?

I didn't k*ll him.

(grunting)

(panting)

The Grand Prix is a disaster zone.

Thousands of dollars worth of damages.

Not to mention a bus driver I may have to charge with manslaughter.

What the hell did this guy do?

He had a tattoo.

‭Mm-hmm.

Tell him, tell him what the ta...

Uh, he had a... a skull tattoo on the side of his neck, which I associated with a cartel in Juarez.

Right, so he questioned him.

I did.

‭And the guy fled, so we pursued at a safe distance.

Because we...

‭And then he pulled a g*n!

Yeah, he pulled a g*n.

(talking over each other)

Stop. Stop!

What were you two doing at the port in the first place?

That's where Ramon Alvarez worked.

The DOA from the bluff.

I thought that was a su1c1de.

Yeah, but he had silt on his shoe.

‭Exac...

(talking over each other)

Stop!

Enough!

Dirt on his shoe, non-dominant hand and Arizona?

That's what we have?

Well, when you say it like that, it doesn't...

Fair enough. I'll put someone else on this.

Per your request Murtaugh, starting tomorrow, both of you are reassigned.

Good luck with your new partner.

(exhales) Maybe it was for the best.

How's that?

I mean, we would've made a terrible team.

Hey, look, look.

Nothing personal.

I'm just at a place in my life where I don't want to be the cowboy anymore.

Whatever gets you through the night.

Hey, whoa, whoa, wait, and what, and what does that mean?

(sighs)

Come on, we were both there.

I saw you.

You were scared.

All right? You don't want to die.

No, I don't want to die.

Unlike you, who tries to accomplish that every second of the day.

Understand I am not trying to judge you.

All right? I get it.

Something happened to you, man, and you snapped.

You want to k*ll yourself?

Go home, put the little sheet down, and get it done, but don't you dare judge me for wanting to stay alive.

Okay, Roger.

I still think you shouldn't be out there, though.

Look, there's plenty of good people in this world that aren't cops.

Go be one of them.

♪ This, is... ♪

I've seen a lot of guys who are a little nuts before... first ones through the door... but this dude is in a class by himself.

It's as if he's trying to die.

And then he has the temerity to want to judge me.

Yeah, baby?

Calm down.

You are the bravest man I know.

Now...

I hope this isn't a ploy to revisit our earlier conversation.

♪ Bow out gracefully ♪

Your belated birthday present.

The barbecue smoker?

No. (laughs)

No.

Your stress-relieving gift.

Oh, yes.

‭Yeah.

The, uh, yeah.

Still very interested.

Are you?

‭Yes.

Well, you get enough wine in me tonight, we'll see.

Mm.

‭(doorbell rings)

Trish: Can you get that, please?

Don't worry. I'll get it.

You keep drinking. Here.

(laughs) Go get the door.

So, uh...

I was at home, uh, thinking about b*llet entry wounds.

Sounds like a very pleasant evening.

And I was flipping through the Alvarez file.

Traces of gunpowder on his temple.

That means he didn't have the g*n pressed against his head.

Seems like a weird way to k*ll yourself.

Mm-hmm. And?

So, anyway, um, you know, I was wondering, you know, maybe, you know, if you wanted to, we could swing by the, uh, coroner's office.

You sure you don't want a cop for that?

Look, maybe I was a little out of line before.

All right, I get it.

You're too old for...

Hey, hey, hey, no.

I'm just as sharp as I've always been.

Trish: Baby, who is it?

Uh, it's no... noth... no one.

Just, um...

Hi. Martin Riggs.

The guy that almost got your husband k*lled.

I'm sure you've heard a lot about me.

Not a word. We're about to have dinner.

Would you like to come in, Martin Riggs?

No, he can't.

He can't...

Yeah, and I ate, like, a week ago, so, you know, I'm fine.

Trish: Oh.

I mean, it smells great, but...

(laughing): Oh.

Tastes even better.

Oh, okay.

My dad says you were in a w*r.

See any action?

(groans) Such a nerd.

Yeah, a little.

You know, I'm thinking about enlisting, too.

No, you're not.

Roger Jr.: I want real-life experience.

What am I gonna learn at Princeton that I couldn't learn from the Internet?

What it feels like to touch a live girl?

(laughs)

I think you should enlist.

Hell, I think there should be a draft.

But I suppose it all depends on the life experience you're after.

If you want to see your best friend's head get blown off, it's ideal.

But if you're just trying to piss off your parents?

Hitchhiking through Thailand, that be a little bit better.

See, Mom, that's exactly what I'm talking about. Experience.

No, stop, we're not talking about that right...

Why?

What's going on?

I don't like being out of the loop.

What's happening?

I had a teeny bit of weed.

What?!

And now Mom is losing her sh...

No... watch it.

‭stuff.

Watch it. Losing her stuff.

I'm really impressed with the weed out here.

I mean, it's incredible, you know?

I mean, as far as I can tell, it's really the only perk to living in California.

I had massive, you know, psychological issues.

So, of course, I would never, uh, suggest that for a child.

What I would suggest, though, maybe your old man take a little hit off the tree.

You know what I mean? Little bald-headed Coolio gets loose.

(laughter)

That's funny, huh?

I like being tight.

It keeps me alive.

Well, we can tell. Yeah.

So, Martin... do you have any kids?

Uh... no.

Um... wasn't really in the cards.

You know?

Mm. But you're married?

Not anymore.

Not anymore, no.

Murtaugh: Imagine that.

Let me guess.

You had an affair with your g*n. (laughs)

Nobody's laughing.

She passed away.

I'm sorry, Martin.

Ah, it's life, right?

Never ceases to surprise.

(baby crying)

It's the baby.

I'll get the baby.

(toy squeaking)

(grunting)

Bite!

Bite!

(baby laughs) Bite!

(squeaking)

What are you doing?

(growling playfully)

Nice family you got.

Yeah, they keep us on our toes.

And up all night.

Yeah, I noticed the slight...

The slight age difference, yeah.

What do you want? It wasn't part of the plan.

Trish was 42.

The kids were out.

Nine months later, this one comes out.

She come... Boom, I'm here!

You can't deny me!

(laughs)

And then I have a heart att*ck in the delivery room.

You were in the right place.

Anywhere else, they say I wouldn't have made it.

Dada!

Dada, dada!

Yeah.

I'm sorry about your wife.

I didn't know.

I know.

I just wanted to embarrass you a little.

Yeah, well, for the future, I do a pretty good job of that myself.

Ain't that right, baby?

Hmm, ain't that right, baby?

She was a good one.

Gave me something to live for, you know?

Hey.

You ever hold one of these before?

Oh, no, I haven't washed my hands in a long time.

I'll be right back.

Where you going?

To get my keys.

The case isn't being reassigned till tomorrow.

That means we got tonight to solve it.

You find anything unusual?

A few things.

See that? Notes of stippling, or gunpowder around the entry wound suggests the g*n wasn't directly against his head when it was fired.

Have you ever seen a su1c1de like that?

Nope.

Also the tox reports say he had 40 milligrams of Klonopin in his system.

Enough to k*ll him if the b*llet didn't get there first.

Didn't his wife say he was off of that drug?

So someone had to know the meds he was on, so it didn't look like he'd been doped.

I'll check his medical records.

All right, I'm gonna go talk to his wife.

Hey, Riggs?

‭Yeah?

You're right.

We would've made a terrible team.

Oh, yeah. Worst.

♪ ♪

Yes?

‭Mrs. Alvarez, Detective Riggs. Quick question.

Who would've known what medications your husb...?

You have to leave.

Yes, ma'am, I understand it's late.

Is there a time...?

Just go.

Please!

(panting)

Shh.

You're being watched, aren't you?

(sobbing) ‭Shh.

What happened?

They took my son.

(gasps)

Tell me what happened.

Oscar never came home from school today.

I got a call. They said that... they said that they had him.

And what, Mrs. Alvarez?

If I ever wanted to see him alive again, I would give back what Ramon stole.

What did he steal?

They said dr*gs.

Heroin.

But I've never seen dr*gs in this house.

Ramon never got high.

I searched everywhere.

But... I don't know where it is.

Thank you.

I'm gonna bring your boy home.

♪ ♪

Murtaugh: Whoa!

Easy, kemosabe.

I come in peace.

Charming place you have here.

Thank you.

Did you know that your house is illegally parked?

So why don't you write me a parking ticket?

What's going on here, Riggs?

A little w*apon spring cleaning.

Okay.

So we're back to doing that bit where we don't tell each other things, right?

Well, I was raised that when you come to someone's house, no matter how disgusting it is, you bring something.

Look who I found in Alvarez's m*llitary records.

Daryl Hennicky.

Alvarez's boss from the port.

And his commanding officer in Iraq.

He said they barely knew one another.

Well, I guess he lied.

So I'm gonna ask you again, what the hell is going on here, Riggs?

Someone kidnapped Alvarez's kid.

Told the wife if she doesn't return the heroin that he stole, they're gonna k*ll the kid.

Heroin?

Okay, that explains why he was rushing to get out of town.

So who has the dr*gs?

Hennicky had to know they were smuggling dr*gs down at the port.

So he hires Alvarez and then he convinces him to steal them.

So Hennicky kills Alvarez...

Mm-hmm.

‭...makes it look like a su1c1de.

Drug dealers think that Alvarez still has their stuff and the cops think he offed himself.

Perfect crime.

So what's the plan?

(inhales)

Go down there and talk to 'em.

Tell 'em I want the kid back.

Okay, then I'm going with you.

Uh, no, no, no, no.

‭Yes, yes, yes.

(sighs)

This is the kind of thing I'd prefer to do alone.

You understand?

Well... all right, you're the boss.

But you can't go running around with that little peashooter that you got there.

All right? So you want the 870 or you want the SIG?

You gotta pick one of 'em.

Hey, hey!

Get these damn handcuffs off me.

Take 'em off me!

‭No.

I'm not gonna do that.

Look, there is cold beer in the fridge, but... yeah, you can't reach that.

Uh... and I gotta take your car. Sorry.

Riggs!

‭(g*n hammer clicks)

(keys jingle)

If you're not gonna do it, I gotta go.

You're a good man, Roger.

And a good cop.

You take care of that family of yours, okay?

(footsteps)

(Riggs whistling)

(continues whistling)

(g*ns clicking)

(door closes)

Could I help you, officer?

Yeah, I'm here for the kid.

What kid?

Ramon Alvarez's son.

Unless you got other kidnapped children here, in which case, I'll take them as well.

Look, I get it. You took the kid because you thought that his dad stole your heroin, which he did.

Which, I could care less about all of this.

My only concern is the 12-year-old boy.

So if you let me walk out of here with him, none of this ever happened.

Or we can explore option number two.

Which is?

Ooh. Well, that's the one where I k*ll as many of you as I can before you take me out and then you up your profile from small-time dealer to cop k*ller.

Then you spend the rest of your life in prison or on the run... most likely, dead.

I'm not saying that it's a great option, but people like choices.

(laughs)

(laughs)

Yeah?

Why don't you put your w*apon down and then I'll show you the kid.

God, I love this w*apon.

(clicks)

All right.

Your turn.

Hey, buddy.

You okay?

Yeah.

All right.

We're gonna get you home, okay? Hold it.

If you know where my product is, go get it right now.

(laughs)

(clicks)

(g*ns clicking)

(shouting)

Roger.

(truck door closes)

What are you doing here?

Came to get these cuffs off me.

Put that BOLO out on Hennicky.

How am I supposed to explain all of this?

(both laughing)

You could call it in anonymously and we could run.

Yeah, right.

‭(g*nsh*t)

(cries out)

(Riggs gasping)

(groaning, laughing)

Ah! You can cancel the BOLO on Hennicky.

Where is he?

Come out and I let the kid live!

(b*llet ricochets)

Give us a second!

Oscar, don't move!

Hennicky: No more warnings! Now!

Oh, f...

Riggs, I only have one sh*t.

(both panting)

Okay.

Here's what we're gonna do.

I'm gonna get up; he's gonna sh**t me.

Okay? But he's gonna give up his position and then you sh**t him.

Okay?

‭Wait.

Wait, wait, wait. Are you insane?

He will k*ll you.

Yeah.

And then you k*ll him.

Stop!

‭What?

Look, it's... D-Don't do this.

Okay?

Don't do this.

I miss my girl.

It's okay.

Just don't miss.

Um...

Don't miss.

(short exhales)

‭(short exhales)

Yeah. Come on.

♪ ♪

Let the kid go!

(exhales)

Uh-huh.

♪ ♪

Ah! ‭(r*fle sh*t)

(grunts)

(screams)

Hey.

Are you all right?

(groans)

Ow!

No!

I can't believe you sh*t me!

Hell, I can't believe it took me so long.

(both chuckling)

Man: It didn't take you long to make yourself at home in L.A.

Uh, you can keep the sun.

This ain't home.

I know.

Oh. Thanks for smoothing everything out with I.A.

Of course.

And, Martin... thank you.

For bringing her home.

I didn't have a choice.

♪ ♪

She's an L.A. girl.

Always hated Texas.

Couldn't make her stay there for an eternity.

No, Martin.

She would've gone anywhere with you.

♪ Shadows settle on the place ♪
♪ That you left ♪
♪ Our minds are troubled by ♪
♪ The emptiness ♪
♪ Setting fire to our insides for fun ♪
♪ Collecting names of the lovers ♪ (whistling)

♪ That went wrong... ♪

You have five seconds to get your ass in this bed.

Oh, look at you! Look at you...

Mm.

‭Happy... belated...

...birthday present.

Where am I going?

Mm. ‭Mmm...

(doorbell rings)

It's okay, it's okay. Don't worry about that. ‭Honey...

It's just the wind. Don't worry about it. Oh, honey, come on.

Go get the door.

(doorbell rings)

It's the wind. ‭Roger, go get the door, please.

Go on! ‭Damn the door!

What?

Look, I, uh...

I never thanked you for saving my life, although I'm not sure you meant to sh**t me in the foot.

Thank you.

Yeah, well, maybe I'll get another sh*t at it.

And I'll see you tomorrow, all right?

All right.

All right.

All right. (groans)

Hey.

Yeah?

I will see you tomorrow, right?

You're not gonna go home and, like... (imitates g*nsh*t)

No. Not tonight.

But you want to.

For real.

Yeah.

I do.

But if it makes you feel any better...

I can't do it myself.

And why is that?

'Cause she'd be ashamed of me.

Crazy, right?

That's probably the least crazy thing about you.

Martin! What are you doing out here?

Murtaugh: Oh, he just dropped this off and then he was leaving.

Well, did you invite him in?

No, 'cause he's...

‭No, he did not.

He didn't invite you in?

Which was quite rude, actually.

I'm standing out here; obviously, I'm injured...

Get in here.

‭You know, your husband's the one that sh*t me and he's just gonna leave me standing out here in the cold.

You didn't tell me that. No, get in there.

I hope I'm not intruding.

Not at all.

Don't worry, honey, 60 is right around the corner.

Sixty? Sixty?

Riggs:You guys got anything to eat?
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