01x05 - Faithful

[bunniefuu]

OFFRED: Previously on The Handmaid's Tale...

DOCTOR: Waterford's probably sterile.

Most of those guys are.

If Waterford can't get you pregnant, they won't blame him.

It'll be your fault.

I can help you.

It's too dangerous.

OFFRED: He tried to connect.

That's what he needs.

It has been so hard.

Being alone in that room.

I'm afraid I'm starting to give up.

That would be a tragedy.

The accused stand charged with gender treachery, in violation of Romans.

I know this is a shock for you, Emily.

Things will be easier for you now.

You won't want

what you cannot have.

f*ck!

NICK: Look, I'm sorry this is happening to you.

You can't change anything about this.

It's gonna end the same no matter what you do,

so there's no point trying to be tough or brave.

Everybody breaks.

Everybody.

WATERFORD: (SIGHS) Very nice.

Thank you.

Not even close. You ran away with that one.

I got lucky.

Maybe you're just learning my weaknesses.

Maybe.

I'll have to be more careful.

What's the fun in that?

OFFRED: What have I learned, after games?

I've learned that he likes it when I flirt.

And I like it when he lets me win.

We're a match made in heaven.

It reminds me of a poem I read once.

"You fit into me like a hook into an eye

a fish hook an open eye"

(DRAWER CLOSING)

I have a present for you.

Those were all destroyed.

Some of us retain an appreciation for the old things.

I thought you might like to read it.

It's not allowed.

It is with me.

OFFRED: I used to buy magazines like this at the airport.

I read them when I got my hair highlighted.

Now the models all look insane.

Like zoo animals.

Unaware they're about to go extinct.

"Ten ways to tell how he feels about you.

Number one, he brings you small gifts."

Check.

Good surprise?

Yes, thank you.

(CHUCKLES)

That look on your face is thanks enough.

(LAUGHING)

(POP MUSIC PLAYING)

- No.
- What?

- Oh, God, no.
- You're too picky.

June, what?

Come on, man. This one has on a fedora.

(LAUGHS) You kidding?

- Beggars, choosers.
- What?

Shut up and show me your profile pic.

Okay.

You better not have on a fedora.

(BOTH LAUGH)

Hold on. No, no fedora.

Good! We can probably do better than this.

- What do you mean?
- I'm just sayin'.

That's a nice photo!

Watch this. Hey. Um, ooh. Hi.

- Hi. You look heterosexual.
- JUNE: Hey.

(CHUCKLING)

MOIRA: Um, sorry.

Quick question. Um, are you on Tinder?

My friend's on Tinder.

- You on Tinder?
- No, I'm...

No? Okay. Look, she is attracting a lot of chumps.

- Okay.
- MOIRA: And I personally...

- What?
- I'm going to k*ll you in your sleep.

I think it's because of her profile pic, and I just wanted to get an objective male opinion.

- Sorry.
- Right, okay.

Ah...

Yeah. It's nice.

- Yeah, it's nice.
- Nice, that's just...

- Nice is chump bait.
- What's wrong with nice?

No, no, no, no!

You have to help me find something better than this.

No. No, he doesn't.

Relax, I'm not going to show him your nudies.

- Seriously?
- No, there are no... It's fine.

- Sorry.
- You gonna...

Hey, I mean, don't look at me.

I'm just waiting for my hot dog, you know. But I'm happy to help out.

I'm gonna help you out with that. No problem.

(BOTH LAUGH)

I'm just... Let's see what we can find.

- Who are those?
- Uh, Lucy and Ethel.

They're my cats.

- Cute.
- Thank you.

Yeah. There's a lot of good options.

Yeah?

- He's very thorough.
- (LAUGHS)

- That one.
- Which one?

- Uh-oh.
- This one.

- No.
- Oh, yeah.

- Oh, look wait.
- Why?

- No, that's a very interesting choice.
- Yeah, because you look...

You look invincible.

MAN: Two hotdogs, extra onion.

Oh, that's... that's me.

- All right.
- Thanks so much. Sorry about that.

- No, my pleasure. All right. Bye.
- JUNE: Have a good one.

Bye, cutie. (LAUGHS)
He's cute. Really cute.

- So cute.
- He's married.

- He does not act married.
- No, they never do.

(LAUGHS)

Thank you.

Blessed day.

(SLURPS)

RITA: Don't you have somewhere to be?

No.

Must be nice.

(TAP WATER RUNNING)

OFFRED: Ten ways to tell how he feels about you.

Number two.

He keeps finding ways to accidentally run into you.

Number three.

What was number three?

Offred? Can you help me outside for a bit?

Yes, Mrs. Waterford.

OFFRED: She found out about Scrabble.

Or she found the writing in the closet.

Or maybe it's the magazine?

Any way you slice it, I lose a hand.

SERENA JOY: Okay, now, that's enough mulch.

Too much and the plant will rot.

(SIGHS) Okay. That's better.

OFFRED: Maybe she's just keeping me occupied until the black van arrives.

There are things I could do.

How hard would I have to press those shears

into her neck before seeing blood?

Nothing yet?

No. Nothing.

Well, that's bad luck.

Your time is running out here.

You don't want to be sent to the Colonies, do you?

(BUSHES RUSTLING)

(EXHALES)

Maybe he can't.

(WIND WHOOSHING)

(WHISPERING) The Commander.

I was thinking maybe we could try another way.

I'm sorry. I don't understand what you mean.

(INHALES)

I mean, with another man.

It's... It's forbidden.

Officially, yes. But women do it all the time.

I'm sure you've heard the stories.

I've heard rumors about...

Doctors.

Yes.

Some women do it that way.

But it should be with somebody we trust.

(INHALES SHARPLY)

I was thinking of Nick.

Nick?

Yeah. He's already agreed.

Nick is loyal, and he's been with us for a very long time.

What about the Commander?

Forget about the Commander.

All right.

All right.

Good.

Good.

(SIGHS)

We'll do it this afternoon after the shopping.

May as well strike while the iron is hot.

Will you bring that in for me?

Yes, Mrs. Waterford.

(SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING)

(MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS)

(INDISTINCT ANNOUNCEMENT OVER PA SYSTEM)

JANINE: You know, she's even started smiling now?

Oh, it's so cute.

And she sticks out her tongue sometimes like this.

Ah.

You really shouldn't talk about that stuff, Ofwarren.

Hater.

Under His eye.

Always blessed.

Did you see?

ALMA: She's back.

(INDISTINCT ANNOUNCEMENT OVER PA SYSTEM)

OFFRED: Blessed be the fruit.

May the Lord open.

- OFFRED: Ofglen.
- Ofsteven.

(SIGHS)

Right.

It's so good to see you.

- Are you okay?
- I'm fine.

- We were worried.
- I'm fine.

The Eyes took you?

Nick, our driver, is he one of them?

Is there anything that you can tell me?

I don't know.

But you said there was an Eye in the house.

I don't know anything anymore.

After what happened, I'm too dangerous to be part of it.

Part of what?

Mayday.

- Mayday? What is Mayday?
- Offred?

There you are.

Hiding out in the vegetables.

(BIRD CAWING)

(INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER)

Don't do that again.

What do you mean?

I mean Ofsteven.

I'm not going to let you mess this up for me.

- This isn't messed up?
- You're cute.

You used to do yoga classes... Spinning or something... Before?

And your man liked to cook?

I don't know what you're talking about.

You guys had a first floor walk-up, down Back Bay, with a garden.

Had yourself a Nordstrom's card, right?

- I liked Anthropologie.
- Yeah?

I used to get f*cked behind a dumpster just so I could buy a sixth of Oxy and a Happy Meal.

I'm clean now.

I've got a safe place to sleep every night and I have people who are nice to me.

Yeah. They're nice.

- All right.
- And I want to keep it that way.

Whatever they did to Ofsteven, that's not gonna happen to me. Understand?

Mmm-hmm.

(INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER)

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

Ready?

Yes, Mrs. Waterford.

(DOG BARKING IN THE DISTANCE)

OFFRED: I should calm down.

Barring the possibility of violent arrest,

it's nothing I haven't done before.

So how come this time it feels like I'm cheating on Luke?

LUKE: Winter is so late this year.

JUNE: What are you talking about? It's cold.

Yeah, but it hasn't even snowed yet.

They say it may not at all this year.

Well, that's depressing.

When I was in college, I used to go to the English department to study.

And there was a fireplace, and it was warm.

I was all by myself.

That sounds safe. Flammable material...

(LAUGHS) It was magical.

Yeah. It was very romantic by myself.

Mmm-hmm.

(CLICKS TONGUE AND INHALES)

So, uh, in college, did you and Moira ever...

Did we ever what?

You know, did you ever...

What, do you think all girls just go through a gay phase?

No, look, it's just you two are very close and you're both very attractive and, in my experience, these things sometimes happen.

- Your experience as a lesbian?
- All right, forget it.

Or your experience as a college girl?

I retract the question, okay?

(LAUGHING)

No!

No, for the record.

I actually haven't even told Moira that we've been having lunch and hanging out.

I don't know why. I just...

I feel like she'd be... Weird about it.

Hmm.

(CLICKS TONGUE)

Yeah, I don't tell Annie either.

Really?

What do you say?

I just... I just tell her I had lunch at my desk.

(CHUCKLES)

I mean, it's just... It's so dumb.

- We're not even doing anything.
- Exactly, that's why I'm just, like, we're having lunch in broad daylight.

Yes.

- With four adorable children.
- Children watching, right?

(BOTH LAUGH)

Where would we even go, you know?

Uh, where would we go?

We couldn't go to my place. Moira's there, working.

What do people in the movies do?

- (LAUGHS) In the movies?
- They get a room.

Yes.

- Yeah, they get a room.
- Mmm-hmm.

Yeah, we could get a room.

(CHUCKLING)

Some, like, um...

- Dirty... (LAUGHS)
- (LAUGHING)

- Pay-by-the-hour...
- Right.

- Place.
- Yeah.

- Gross.
- No.

No, it could be fun. They'd have one of those vibrating beds.

- (LAUGHS)
- Think about it.

We could go to the Hyatt.

Hmm.

Yeah.

One of those, you know, higher rooms with a view of the city at night.

So, how would it work? I'd just...

Come surprise you after work, or...

No. No, never.

No surprises. I need hours.

Right. Time to get a restraining order.

Yes, file the papers.

- Right.
- (LAUGHS) Yeah.

No, I mean, I need to... Personal grooming and...

Um...

Pick out some lingerie.

What, you know what you'd wear?

I have ideas.

It's not gonna happen, though.

- No.
- No.

No. (BREATHING DEEPLY)

(EXHALES)

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

- Hello, Nick.
- NICK: Hi.

(DOG BRAKING OUTSIDE)

So, uh, do we pray first?

No. There's no time.

Please.

(FLOORBOARD CREAKING)

(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

(METAL CLANKING)

(SIGHS)

(CLEARS THROAT)

You want to see what's on TV?

- No, that's...
- No?

- Do you?
- No...

(CLICKS TONGUE)

I'm good.

Are you sure?

Is this one crooked?

Yeah.

(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)

Wait. Just 'cause we're probably only going to do this once...

- Yeah?
- I like to be on top, okay?

Ah, that's not really...
That's not good for me.

That's not good? Oh, that's a bummer.

All right. I'll try it. I'll try it once.

(LAUGHING)

Thanks. (GIGGLING)

(WHISPERING) That's really nice of you.

- Yeah, I'm a giver.
- (LAUGHS)

(FLOORBOARD CREAKING)

(NICK BREATHING HEAVILY)

(BED CREAKING)

(EXHALES SHARPLY)

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

(BED BUMPING)

(GRUNTS)

(CATCHING BREATH)

(SIGHS)

All clear.

You should go and lie down now.

How do you feel?

Do you feel any different?

You don't just feel pregnant seconds after a man cums.

I'm sorry, forgive me.

Before I formed thee in the belly, I knew thee.

And before thou camest out of the womb, I sanctified thee, and ordained thee a prophet unto the nations.

Go and lie down.

(FLOORBOARD CREAKING)

(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

(PANTING)

GRACE: Blessed be the fruit.

May the Lord open.

(CHUCKLES) He's so happy to have someone to play with.

(DOG BARKS)

(LEAVES RUSTLING)

You know, I'm not feeling very well.

I might be getting the flu.

Maybe we should skip tonight's Ceremony.

What do you think?

You can't be sick every month.

No.

I can't.

(DOG PANTING)

(BALL THUDS)

(LEAVES RUSTLING)

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Come in.

(DOOR OPENS)

(DOOR SHUTS)

(FLOOR CREAKING)

- Good evening.
- Good evening, dear.

Shall we begin?

(KEYS JANGLING)

(LOCK OPENING)

(FLOOR CREAKING)

(BED THUDDING)

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

OFFRED: Stop it!

Stop it!

Don't look at me like that, please.

Can she see him doing this?

Can she feel him?

(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

(KNOCKING)

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

WATERFORD: This is a surprise.

Care for a drink?

A game?

OFFRED: Don't you ever do that again.

- Do what?
- Touch me like that, when she's there.

I didn't mind it.

- I don't think you did either.
- What if she saw you?

She could have me sent to the Colonies

or worse and you know that.

I understand.

I'm sorry, all right?

Okay.

WATERFORD: I just find the whole thing so impersonal.

- (GLASS CLINKING)
- You think?

You sure you wouldn't care for a drink?

No, thank you.

All right.

How about a read?

No.

You miss this?

Lists of made-up problems.

No woman was ever rich enough, young enough, pretty enough, good enough.

(CHUCKLES)

We had choices then.

Now you have respect.

You have protection.

You can fulfill your biological destinies in peace.

(PAGE TURNS)

Biological destiny?

Children. What else is there to live for?

Love.

Love?

Yes.

(CHUCKLES)

Love isn't real.

It was...

Never anything more than lust with a good marketing campaign.

Maybe for you but not for me.

What did you say?

Nothing.

Remember Ofglen who used to live next door?

Ofglen had urges that led her to do unnatural things.

I'm sure, to her, it felt like love.

In cases such as these, the punishment is death.

But, out of respect for her position, we let her live.

We're not without compassion.

What did you do to her?

We helped her. We saved her.

We had a doctor take care of the problem.

It's such a small problem, truth be told.

Every love story is a tragedy if you wait long enough.

(BREATHING SHAKILY)

I should go.

Suit yourself.

We only wanted to make the world better.

Better?

Better never means better for everyone.

It always means worse for some.

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS)

(DOOR UNLOCKS)

(FLOOR CREAKING)

OFFRED: Better never means better for everyone.

It always means worse for some.

(VOMITS AND COUGHS)

(SPITS)

(COUGHS)

(GASPING)

(SPITS)

(SNIFFLING)

(PANTING)

NICK: Are you sick?

(SIGHS)

(COUGHS)

(SNIFFLING) What are you doing here?

Huh?

You spying on me?

I was just looking for something to eat.

Are you an Eye?

Go to bed.

Do you know...

What they did to Ofglen?

- Yes.
- (SCOFFS)

Do you know because...

You're one of them?

- You shouldn't be down here.
- Don't tell me where to go.

NICK: You listen to me. It's not safe.

Please don't tell me what to do.

I couldn't say no when Mrs. Waterford asked me.

I'm sorry.

(GULPS)

I'm sorry.

(GULPS)

Just tell me.

(SHAKILY) Okay, please?

Please.

Are you an Eye?

Yes.

Hmm.

Now go to bed before I report you.

(LAUGHS)

(LAUGHS)

Okay.

(EERIE MUSIC PLAYING)

I want you to leave your wife.

Okay.

Wait, really? What do you mean, "Okay"?

Look, I'm in love with you.

(CHUCKLES) What else am I going to do?

(WHISPERS) I'm in love with you.

(VEHICLE APPROACHES)

(DOOR OPENS)

Those are beautiful lilies.

I'm allergic.

My eyes, like, swell up.

I think my companion might like them.

OFSAMUEL: Have you seen the lilies?

They're really pretty.

Come on, this way. Your mistress might like them.

Hi.

I know what they did to you.

I'm so sorry.

- Ofglen.
- I'm not Ofglen.

I know. Just, it's hard to keep track.

OFGLEN : Offred, you should come see the lilies.

Yes, of course.

Mayday can't use me anymore.

But you can help them.

Who are they?

They're fighting back.

Find them.

Ofglen... Ofsteven, how do I find them?

My name is Emily.

Who are you?

You are going to come by the lilies and you are going to stay by the lilies.

JANINE: (LAUGHING) It makes her sound like an old man.

OFERIC: Make her frown.

MAN: Halt! Halt!

I said, halt!

Open!

Open the door! Open the door!

Hey! Turn off the engine and exit the vehicle!

This is your last warning! Open the door!

Halt!

(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

What's she doing?

Driving.

(LAUGHING)

(ORCHESTRAL MUSIC PLAYING)

(BEEPING)

(INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER)

(ALL SCREAMING)

(GLASS SHATTERS)

(OFSTEVEN GRUNTS)

OFGLEN : It's not safe here. Come on.

Come on!

Go in grace.

It'll be okay.

We're gonna look out for each other.

OFFRED: Mayday.

Luke told me once where the term came from.

It's French.

M'aidez.

"Help me."

(MAN TALKING ON RADIO)

(THUNDER RUMBLING)

(THUDDING)

Offred, is that you?

I heard there was a bit of trouble in town.

Yeah.

A bit.

Are you all right?

Mmm-hmm.

I'm fine.

Good.

Some women can't handle the requirements of their position.

They can't do what needs to be done.

You understand what I'm saying?

Yes, Mrs. Waterford.

You're a smart girl.

OFFRED: They didn't get everything.

There was something inside her...

That they couldn't take away.

She looked invincible.

(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

(INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER)

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

(SCOFFS)

(DOOR LOCK CLICKS)

(BOTH BREATHING HEAVILY)

(ORCHESTRAL MUSIC PLAYING)

(MOANING)

(BOTH GRUNTING)

(♪ "I WANT A LITTLE SUGAR IN MY BOWL" BY NINA SIMONE)