04x02 - Chino and the Man
VERONICA: Previously on Veronica Mars...
BIG DICK: As a boy growing up in Neptune, this was paradise.
And that's what Neptune United for a Tidy Town is all about.
- No to NUTT.
I can't believe my mom screwed us over on the house.
It's because of me, isn't it?
His family hates me.
As it should be.
No one studies on spring break.
- [MATTY SCREAMING]
KEITH: They're saying four dead.
The motel owner died.
Plus a Mexican national, a law school student, and the fiancée of Alex Maloof, younger brother of Congressman Daniel Maloof.
Find out who planted the bomb.
Bring me that information.
- VERONICA: Stop.
- We're not getting married.
- KEITH: How's Logan...takin' the rejected marriage proposal?
He's behaving like an emotionally mature adult.
[SPANISH LANGUAGE HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING]
What are you doin' here?
Moth to a flame.
Look, you gotta help me out, Magnus.
You need to get clean, man.
Maybe I'm just being true to myself, and my true self really needs heroin, so...
- MAN: Hey.
Did you screw Heidi?
I did not screw Heidi, man.
To be honest, I...
I don't even know who she is.
- My baby sister.
Runs with Daryl's crew?
Big ol' fake titties?
That's your sister?
Hey, can I get my heroin, please?
- I don't have any...
- ADDICT: I gotta get out of here.
James, no, no, no, no!
What did you do?!
Look at him.
He's a cop.
He's a frickin' cop!
How's that clown a cop?
That's my first take.
[MOVIE SOUNDTRACK PLAYING]
VERONICA: After Logan proposed, I expected fallout.
Some tears, maybe.
An avalanche of anger and resentment.
But the only person feeling resentful afterwards was me.
It felt like he had proposed on a lark, and the agony I felt telling him no was met with, "Hey, no biggie." Okay, I think the hardest scene for me was when I was supposed to surf while trippin' on heroin, 'cause I had to think two things at the same time.
- LOGAN: It's a challenge.
- You were amazing.
- Well, that was somethin', huh?
Well done, superstar!
Boy, they didn't scrimp on the blood, huh?
- DICK: Hell, no.
- BIG DICK: Whoa.
Alright, when are you two crazy kids gonna make it legal?
DICK: [GRUNTS, LAUGHS]
Funny you should ask.
LOGAN: Why ruin a good thing, huh?
BIG DICK: Oh, uh, Veronica, Logan, meet my friend and associate Clyde.
- We go back to....
- LOGAN: How ya doin'.
- ya know, when I was on the inside.
- VERONICA: Hi.
And, uh, who is this?
Yeah, I was gonna...
I was gonna say that.
So, V, I gotta say, playing an undercover detective has really given me a deep appreciation for what you do.
Hold multiple thoughts at the same time?
You know, Veronica here's a legit P.I.
She's workin' the Sea Sprite bombing.
You wouldn't think it by looking at her, but you know what they say about small packages.
- That you've gone one?
Yeah, I feel weird for asking, but, uh, what does Big Dick's right hand do?
I'm just a glorified property manager.
Oh, the guy's brilliant.
He does everything.
I thought we were going to an after-party at DJ Khaled's house.
No, babe, the after-party party's after this party.
- TIMMY: Hey!
- Hey, shoot me the party deets.
- TIMMY: What?
DICK: Buddy, let's party!
- Come on, baby!
- BIG DICK: I'm gonna get a drink.
- DICK: What's up, man?
- TIMMY: What's up?
So, I can't get over how much you look like my niece.
You're probably about the same age.
When were you born?
Same as her.
So, high school class of ...
I don't know what kind of math they're teaching at your high school, but you should probably pay more attention.
And you should probably go...
somewhere else, maybe the prom?
DICK: Hey, hey!
If you're goin' to the bar, grab me me another whatever-this-is.
Wait, what just happened?
Clyde just saved you from statutory rape charges.
Well, I'm gonna grab another drink, and maybe check my star-meter.
[PATS CLYDE'S SHOULDER]
- Go for it.
You got it.
- [DODIE CONTINUES IN SPANISH]
¿hables usted Inglés?
do you know where I can score some coke in this town?
'Cause, uh, me and my boys, we're just lookin' to party, ya know?
Sure thing, amigo.
Why don't you meet me at the rest stop right before the meets the PCH.
In about a hour.
I will, uh...
I'll see you there.
We should try to blend in.
Hey, you're right.
It's like we disappeared.
What do we do now?
The boss is gonna text me the names of his nephew's crew.
We'll track 'em down.
They should know something.
VOLLEYBALL PLAYER: Little help?
What the hell, Paco?!
You're messin' with the wrong guy.
Hey, why don't you put that knife away?
Then we can...
[VOLLEYBALL PLAYER GASPS]
GUY # : Get out of here.
Let's let it go.
It's not worth it.
DODIE: We should do something about our look, man.
I don't think we're blending in.
- [SPEAKING SPANISH]
There was a Walmart when we got off the highway.
You think these people shop at Walmart?
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
SINGER: ♪ A long time ago ♪
♪ We used to be friends ♪
♪ But I haven't thought of you lately at all ♪
♪ Bring it on, bring it on, yeah ♪
♪ Just remember me when ♪
♪ We used to be friends ♪
♪ A long time ago ♪
♪ We used to be friends ♪
♪ A long time ago ♪
♪ We used to be friends ♪
♪ Hey ♪
Not quite the three-hole muni back in Bakersfield, huh, Clyde?
No, it is not.
- Hey, Dad, what'd you say about this place?
"Expensive enough the cart girls don't complain."
BIG DICK: [LAUGHS]
Listen, our friend Clyde here's a gentleman, so no crass talk about the ladies today, fellas.
There go my plans.
Ms. Cart Girl.
How about a few of those tiny cognacs, huh?
- Member number .
BIG DICK: No, no, no, no, no.
What are you, nuts?
Those are, like, sixty bucks apiece.
Uh-uh-uh, he's fine, sweetheart, sorry.
Yeah, Dad, but Logan's poor now, so the only time he drinks the good stuff is when I buy it for him.
Yeah, well you can buy him all the good booze you want.
I'm not poor.
Uh, dude, I looked up what you make online.
You're kinda poor.
You offered to be my personal trainer.
You know, Mr.
C, I know someone who can remove that for ya.
This is a badge of honor, my friend.
I was inked up by Manny "Six Fingers" Delgado doin' a dime for aggravated assault.
I show up at a meeting with a bunch of bankers, sleeves rolled up, those number-crunchers get a look at that, instant upper hand.
No, no, please stop!
Oh, my God, please!
So you don't forget you're my bitch, Sweet Cheeks.
- CLYDE: Hey!
- [BIG DICK GROANS]
Let's cut him some slack, Menthol.
I don't think he's happy with that font.
I'm sorry, did that sound like a suggestion?
BIG DICK: Clyde!
C'mon, load up!
: at Vista Ensenada means : !
Where's the first tee, and what's the course record?
Gabriel was working on an assignment, and the Wi-Fi wasn't functioning.
You're Craig, right?
Craig Raden, right.
[VIDEO GAME GUNFIRE]
And that's when Gabriel went down to the office?
To see if he can get it turned on.
- With his backpack?
He took it with him.
Gabriel was kind of the nerd of our group.
We came here to party, but he never stopped thinking about grades.
- SIMON: You sure you don't want a beer?
- Yeah, I'm sure.
I didn't know P.I.'s looked like you.
I thought they all looked like, uh...
well, you know, him.
- Like molten s*x gods?
- [ALL LAUGHING]
I like a woman who sees a glass ceiling and just says, "Eff that." Yep, me too.
when were you guys at Comrade Quacks?
Like, the night before the bombing.
Alex, Tawny and Jillian were there as well.
GUY: So was the other guy.
The guy we saw get kicked out.
- I saw his picture in the news.
- LLOYD: Mm-hmm, yeah.
- Some waitress knocked his ass out.
- [ALL LAUGH]
Can you describe her?
Believe that was the owner.
So this King Pagursky you mentioned...
is he the only enemy of Gabriel you can think of?
Gabriel was hard not to like.
Pagursky, on the other hand...
- Total dick.
- VERONICA: Okay.
Well, if you think of anything else, give us a call.
Yeah, I, uh... think of things all the time, so...
- KEITH: I'll run down this King Pagursky.
Sounds like nothin'.
Off to Comrade Quacks.
Ready to get our ducks wet?
More billable hours.
Plus, I really want to ingest a -ounce cocktail in under two seconds.
I don't think that's possible.
It is with a funnel.
chick and I had a thing.
How'd you not pick up on that?
- I'm not wired into your imagination.
- [KNOCK ON DOOR]
You Simon or Greg?
Uh, we don't have any money.
Do we look like we're here to rob you?
You look like you're...
Well, I do, but he looks like he rents boats, right?
There's no Greg.
- No Greg Raden?
- CRAIG: Oh!
Uh, Craig Raden.
- [SPRING BREAKERS CRY OUT]
Every time you go to Starbucks, it says "Greg" on your cup, right?
But you still pick it up, because you know...
So, who killed Gabriel?
- We don't know!
- DODIE: Who?
- [MOUTHING WORDS]
SIMON: This kid on Gabriel's robotics team who blamed his valve design for the arm hardware failure that cost them the spot in the DARPA Robotics Challenge.
Even though it clearly was a sequencing issue.
Where's King Pagursky?
I'm pretty sure he went to Costa Rica for spring break.
He coulda mailed it.
Or planted it and put it on a timer.
Coulda hired a hitman.
That seems like a stretch.
I heard Costa Rica fell through.
I think he's here in Neptune.
Can I ask how you guys know Gabriel?
What'd you say you were givin' me, like four strokes a side?
"Blow me" is what I'm givin' you.
You know Clyde here used to rob banks?
You believe that?
Who does that?
LOGAN: Bank robbers?
Give 'em hell at that next zoning meeting.
Did you read the proposal I sent over?
Call my girl, we'll set something up.
Actually, I got a couple hours to kill right now.
Let's get it done.
Wouldn't mind takin' one for the team, would ya?
Well, if it's business.
We'll pick your ball up for ya.
Shouldn't be hard to spot.
It's the one in the middle of the fairway about a hundred yards from the pin.
BIG DICK: [LAUGHS]
- How you been, man?
- BIG DICK: Good.
- Nice to see you again.
I just wanted to say thank you.
Just not being a pathetic, howling mess near me is thanks enough.
Look, I-I have days left in here, and I'm not gonna make it unless I have some help.
So I was thinking, um, you help me on the inside, and I can help you on the outside.
Get you whatever you want.
I'll give it some thought.
[BIG DICK CLEARS THROAT]
Looks like everything worked out like you said.
Pass along my thanks to the boys.
That was impressive, Menthol.
I mean, I really believed you were gonna bugger that guy.
You got some real acting chops.
It's all about being alive in the moment.
Get you something?
You got any of those little bottles of cognac?
How many would you like?
Member number .
MARCIA: You know, I have experience with what you're going through right now.
My brother, he was murdered.
Did a bomb rip him to shreds?
Were there pieces of him on your windshield?
He was stabbed in the neck with a shiv.
So let's talk about what you do know.
Did he have any enemies that you know about?
- Any debts?
Don't all adults?
- Don't you?
- [SARGENT TAPS ON GLASS]
Give me a minute.
- You needed me right now?
- The mayor's on the phone.
- He can stay on the phone.
- He thinks we're spread too thin.
He wants you to ask the FBI for help.
You tell the mayor to suck a dick.
So you'll call him back?
It's been three days.
People are dead, and he's worried about pickpockets and graffiti.
So what do you want me to actually say to him?
You tell him that he interrupted me right when I was about to get a key witness to open up to me.
Kids hate me.
I think it's the uniform.
That little sh1t.
Were we ever that young?
Speak for yourself.
I'm down here every weekend, raisin' roofs, makin' mirth, honky-tonkin'.
- Heavy on the honky.
- [PHONE CHIMES]
Listen to this tweet from the pizza delivery guy.
"Can Neptune law enforcement solve the bombing case?
Will Chief Langdon be another in a chain of clowns and scoundrels?
Remember Mars ?
#SeaSpriteBombing." A pizza guy said that?
Let's pay him a visit.
See if he calls you a clown to your face.
I'm an old guy with a cane, Veronica.
He very well might.
[FOOTSTEPS ON THE STAIRS]
Hello, Mars family.
Ohh, you two are legends in this town.
Thanks for talking to us.
I mean, I was curious as to why you wanted to talk to me about the Sea Sprite bombing.
Well, these people all died in the explosion.
With the exception of this guy, the motel owner, everyone else was in your bar the night before the bombing.
Remember any of 'em?
This piss wizard.
I had to him.
Why is that?
He was forcing a passed-out female's head down into his lap.
And that's why you punched him?
I punched him because I couldn't find my Uzi.
What did you get into?
I made paella.
And I basically used every pan we own, so....you're welcome, and I'm sorry.
So that guy Clyde, Big Dick's new bestie?
- VERONICA: Yeah?
- He used to rob banks.
You know, Big Dick's all sort of hard about that.
I guess that, uh, they shared a cell in Chino.
Two Chino alums, now community leaders.
- This town is the worst.
- No argument there.
Don't do that.
Go along to get along.
You sure about that?
Because disagreeing with you doesn't end well, either.
Agree with me or don't agree with me, just...
say you're indifferent, but don't act like you're the number two at the Politburo.
Well, you're really shrinkin' my safe space here, Veronica.
What do I think about our hometown?
After summering in Fallujah, Neptune, with its perfect weather and endless supply of head-high waves, ranks, you know, above it.
But I know where you're coming from, and I want to be supportive.
That right there.
That's the person I don't know.
The guy trying to be supportive?
You're like a pod person now.
You asked me to marry you, Logan, and I said no, and it's like nothing happened.
It had me reeling.
And you...you look like I turned down your offer for a back rub.
I feel like you asked so you'd get the "no" you knew you'd get, - and now I'm the bad guy.
- LOGAN: Hmm.
Okay, well, what do you want from me, Veronica?
I don't know, maybe just to know that there's some classic Logan coursing through those veins.
What was I supposed to do when you said no, Veronica?
Bang a Tri-Delt?
And what would have been enough?
Beat someone to death?
- Guess what.
- [STICKS KNIFE IN CUTTING BOARD]
I am angry.
All the time.
And all of the work I'm doing with Jane is aimed at one thing...keeping my anger from destroying me.
You say you want Bruce Banner...
- but you really want the green guy.
- VERONICA: No.
I want Bruce...
D-Did your therapist put you on meds?
- I-lt's fine if she did.
- Goddamnit, no.
VERONICA: Okay, well, you just feel...
sanded down, Logan minus the Logan.
[BOTH PANTING, GASPING]
Is that classic Logan enough for ya?
- [OBJECTS CLATTER]
- [VERONICA GASPS]
How you doin' today, champ?
Feel like I should be giving you a gold star or a fruit basket or something, but I gotta go interview the pizza guy.
That's what you like?
grilling pizza guys?
Me losing control like that?
Punching a hole in the cabinet?
I was remembering more of the hair-pulling and the speaking in tongues.
Well, at least it was good for you.
LOGAN: Listen, I'm gonna take Pony for a walk.
I, uh, I left a number for my therapist.
Maybe you should give her a call.
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
I've been in your homes and Mars Investigations I don't know...
How many times would you guess?
Too many to count.
How come you guys don't order Cho's pizza anymore?
You know, I'm not sure.
- Why don't we?
Did you want one?
what can I do to help?
Well, my dad would like to ask you what you remember at the Sea Sprite, and I would like to politely ask you to take down that tweet about my dad.
After that, who knows where things are gonna go?
You, uh, you follow me?
A friend forwarded it.
Okay, that's cool.
I mean, last week I had...
followers, all Murderheads.
Now it's more than , .
So anything I witnessed, it's all there in the tweets.
- But since we're here... ?
- Yeah, okay.
W-Well, first, "Murderheads"?
You've never heard of us?
We're an online community of justice seekers devoted to solving cold cases.
- Is that so?
- You know what, on second thought, I will take that beer.
You know, information we found led to the capture...
of the Long Beach Strangler.
Now it's ringing a bell.
So you deliver pizzas and solve murders.
You left the motel office right as the bomb went off?
Five seconds prior.
I walked out, I waved to Matty, and then: boom.
Me, I-I caught some shrapnel in the back, but...
how lucky was I?
I don't know, I'd call it a mixed bag.
So the motel owner's daughter would have been looking straight into the office?
She... saw the whole thing, that poor kid.
And what happened then?
I woke up in the hospital.
I don't even know how I got there.
[REVELERS SHOUTING IN DISTANCE]
You ever ask the landlord to keep it down?
You think I live here?
That'd be pretty sad.
- But the people in the house...
- The house is mine.
I move in here in April, I rent the place out to spring breakers.
I clear K in a month.
The place sleeps ten.
- Let's get back to the tweets.
So, you called my dad a clown or a scoundrel, and if I wore gloves, this would be when I peel one off and smack you across the face.
- [PENN STAMMERS]
I'll take down the tweet.
Okay, professional courtesy.
From one pizza delivery guy to two people who do not do that.
I mean, didn't he lose an election because of evidence tampering?
That was really a me thing.
And didn't he go after the wrong guy in your best friend's murder?
Go ahead and leave up the tweet, Mr.
Thanks for your time.
Do you think they'll ever figure out who murdered Lilly Kane?
Should I have called ahead and made an appointment?
We take walk-ins.
Can I get you anything?
- Um, I'm fine, thank you.
- VERONICA: Mm.
What can I do for you?
Well, um...that, uh, little sh1t friend of your boyfriend, when he said you're a detective, I remembered an article that I read.
They did a feature on you in Vanity Fair, right?
Eight column inches.
As you can see, it set me up for life.
Just blurt it out.
I've heard it all.
I was seeing a woman, living with her, actually, uh, when I was arrested.
And we lost touch when I was away.
I haven't seen her or spoken to her since.
I was hoping you could help me find her.
I-I just want to know that she's okay.
And... say some things that were left unsaid.
Her name is Ichiko Doi, and I have her last known address.
- Clyde, please.
You're asking me to find a woman who, it seems to me, has made a choice to not include you in her life.
You know what?
I get it.
Seemed like a good idea at two o'clock in the morning, but...
I appreciate your directness.
Most people don't.
- KEITH: Congressman.
Thank you for meeting us.
There was really no need.
Truth is, I'm hopin' to grab a minute with the coroner.
We go way back, and he might help us with some of the forensics.
MEDICAL EXAMINER: Did you get to see your fiancée's family?
- They were here?
- MEDICAL EXAMINER: Earlier.
To identify the body.
They were waiting to see you.
Maybe they went to get coffee.
- You're not smarter than us!
- I don't even know - what you're talkin' about.
- MAMA CARR: Yes, you do!
- Just get out.
Get out of here!
- Everybody calm down!
It was hers.
That makes it ours.
- That's ridiculous.
- There was no wedding.
- You're Alex, right?
- MAMA CARR: I'm Tawny's mom.
Maybe you can tell me why her engagement ring wasn't in with her personal effects.
- It wasn't?
- TAYLER: [MOCKING]
"It wasn't?" No, it wasn't, 'cause you stole it, shithead!
No, I didn't!
The ring is a family heirloom.
My brother didn't take it.
But when it's located, it belongs to us.
Not according to American law.
Once he gave it to my Tawny, here in America, it became hers.
Alright, whaddya say we all go to our own corners...
Hey, whaddya say you mind our own business, huh?!
You see, Alex?
This is the family that you were going to marry into.
- What'd you call us?!
- MAMA CARR: I oughta...
I will arrest the next person who moves.
- Well, I wanna report...
- Shut up.
Please escort the Carr family to their vehicle.
And make sure they leave the parking lot, please.
Eyeball me again.
- Thank you.
- Yeah, just...
You go too.
Yeah, well, God knows what you were up to here.
I told you...
- ALEX: I didn't take the ring.
- Whatcha got?
- KEITH: I don't think I'll be able to meet you at the girl's house.
How did things go at the morgue?
Police chief showed up, and you know how she feels about private investigators.
- KEITH: Hey, Veronica?
KEITH: I heard from Inga that Matty slipped out of her interview with the police chief, and they haven't been able to bring her in to talk to her since.
Sounds like she's slippery.
You told me that already.
You're losin' it, old man.
Besides, I think I can handle a -year-old girl.
I gotta go.
- Bye, now.
- [SOFT CLANK]
- [DEVICE BEEPS]
RENEE: Helen, is your phone charged?
Is your phone charged?
Troy, I said no chips.
Dad lets me have chips, so...
I'm saying no chips.
Yeah, but he's Dad, and you're Renee.
Who the hell are you?
Shut up, Troy.
Hey, um, Renee, is Matty coming down, or... ?
She said she was changing.
You two, out in the car.
- TROY: Can I bring my scooter?
Put it in the trunk.
- [DOOR OPENS]
- RENEE: Matty!
The private investigator's waiting.
I don't see her up there.
I don't know where she's gone.
- [DOOR OPENS]
- TROY: Renee?
My scooter's gone, and so is my helmet.
I'll just show myself out.
SINGER: ♪ I'm lookin' for you ♪
♪ I'm lookin' for you ♪
♪ Don't know where to go ♪
- ♪ Don't know what to do ♪
Oh, you are good.
SINGER: ♪ ...
a million people that I don't see ♪
♪ Maybe they think that I am mad ♪ Wait.
You're not moving anymore.
- There you are.
- SINGER: ♪ I'm lookin' for you ♪
♪ I'm lookin' for you, don't know where to go ♪
♪ Don't know what to do ♪
What the cuss?
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
SINGER: ♪ You and me, that's what I like ♪
♪ You and me, that's what I like ♪
Veronica, where would you be heading?
SINGER: ♪ You and me, that's what I like ♪
MAN IN DISTANCE: Party!
I just wanna talk.
San Antonio lost to Phoenix at home, the over on Boston and San Antonio, and the under on Phoenix.
Don't press your luck.
- Are you the boss here?
I'm the boss.
And... who the hell are you?
I need to talk to the guy who stocked the snack machine at the Sea Sprite last week.
I heard the owner's dead.
Who are you?
The new owner.
It was my dad's place.
Alright, well, when you reopen... we're gonna get you a new machine.
But we are gonna charge you for the one we lost.
Y-You won't be putting a machine in when we reopen, and you won't be charging us for a new one.
You know what, I'll drop in when I see you're open again, we'll talk about it then.
Don't touch anything.
Whoever filled in for our normal guy put gum in the machine.
We don't do gum.
We're a motel?
Well, your dad's dead, and you come down here to bitch about gum in the machine.
Last warning: Go.
He had a mole right here...
Oh, that does it.
I'm gonna whip your ass the way someone shoulda a long time ago!
- [FOOTSTEPS RECEDING]
Hey, um, I'm...
I'm looking for who...
What did you call me?
OWNER: Jesus H.
Grab that little bitch!
- OWNER: Get her now!
- OWNER: Come on!
- I've been lookin' for you.
- Great, you found me.
- [PISTOL COCKS]
Back away from the car, would ya?
LIAM: Okay, okay.
God damn, I hate that girl.
- MATTY: I'm just up here and...
- VERONICA: To the left.
Yeah, I know.
You led me on a wild goose chase, remember?
So, um, thanks.
Do you have any idea how dangerous those people are that you were messing with?
- Alpha-Jolly Amusements is owned by Liam Fitzpatrick, leader of the Fitzpatrick family.
Those guys chasing me were not all related.
Most of their employees are guys they served time with.
There is no telling how many operations are planned out of that place, which is why you should not be wandering around in there.
So why were you?
You think one of them had something to do with the bomb?
I need to get home.
Thanks for the ride.
So that was the plan, just go in there and rattle their cages, see what happens?
I mean, what am I supposed to do?
Sit at home?
You could tell the police your theory.
You could tell me.
Who do you work for?
Daniel Maloof, the congressman.
His little brother was in my dad's face, demanding a refund when he was trying to check out early.
If not for him, we might have been eating our pizza in Dad's room.
He'd still be alive.
But no, the rich kid had to get his deposit so that he could go stay at the Neptune Grand.
What's your theory, Matty?
Thanks for the rescue.
You get one of those.
VERONICA: I knew that nothing I could say was going to keep Matty away from the case.
I was starting to get a clearer picture of her life.
Parents split up, then a murder, followed by the agony of not knowing where to focus her rage.
I know the sort of person who emerges on the other side.
VERONICA: I thought if I could solve the case quickly enough, she might not have time to set and harden.
VERONICA: Once a girl sets and hardens, her life becomes a series of apologies.
I'm the asshole.
_ DICK: Dude, you gotta use the pilot as your buddy.
I am a military officer.
I should be able to get past these cult weirdos.
It's your special lady friend.
- LOGAN: Hey, just so you know...
Look, I know there's something screwy in me.
I turned down your proposal, which was incredibly romantic, and I get mad because your reaction is too, I don't know, - blasé.
- [TAPS PHONE]
- [DICK LAUGHS]
- I'm at Dick's suite playin' Far Cry.
I hope that's a video game.
All right, well, we'll just talk when you get home.
Are you sure?
I love you.
I love you too.
You're at the Neptune Grand?
Now that everything is instantly and completely fine between us...
feel like doing me a favor?
- [VIDEO GAME GUNFIRE]
- Aw, suck it!
[MUFFLED VOICES SPEAKING ARABIC]
- LOGAN: Excuse me.
You must be Logan, here for the check.
Come on, come in.
Pour yourself a drink if you'd like one.
Uh, thanks, I'm good.
I'm having a little bit of trouble locating my checkbook.
One moment, please.
Can you help look for my checkbook in the bedroom?
Would you mind looking on the dresser in that room?
ROOM SERVICE WAITER: Can I get you anything else?
I'd like my three fingers back.
No, thank you.
You need to cut this sh1t out, Alex.
Don't start playing Dad.
You're not Dad.
Why don't you give me, like, I don't know, a week to mourn?
Mourn all you want, just don't be a prick about it.
TYLER: Nice room, Congressman.
Where's the ring, Maloof?
I already told you, we don't have the ring.
Now get out of our room.
ALEX: We're gonna a call security, man.
TYLER: It's in here somewhere.
DANIEL: Get out of our room!
- [AMALIA SCREAMS]
- TYLER: Where is it?!
I had to make some assumptions about who the good guys were.
Didn't you just screw the pooch.
Whoever you are....we're gonna make you bleed.
I guessed right.
Well, enough talkin' about it.
Words into action, fellas.
FRANKIE VALLI: ♪ I love you, baby ♪
♪ And if it's quite all right ♪
♪ I need you, baby, to warm my lonely night ♪
♪ I love you, baby ♪
♪ Trust in me when I say ♪
♪ Oh, pretty baby ♪
♪ Don't bring me down, I pray ♪
♪ Oh, pretty baby ♪
- ♪ Now that I've found you, stay ♪
- Oh, please don't.
FRANKIE VALLI: ♪ Let me love you, baby ♪
♪ Let me love you ♪
- [TYLER GROANS, SOBS]
- [BONE CRACKS]
[KNIFE SCRAPES FLOOR]
It wasn't in there.
- I'm sorry.
- The checkbook.
Think you could give me a credit card?
- [KNOCKING ON DOOR]
- KEITH: It's me!
What's with the drop-in?
I could have been having s*x.
You're not married.
Have you been watchin' the news?
People downstairs asked me not to.
I don't know if it was the screaming or the profanity they couldn't get used to.
Things just got more interesting on our case, and not in the best way.
KEITH: Wait till you see who pops up on Drew Process.
You watch murder p0rn too?
I knew it.
This week's story: "Spring Break, Spring Slaughter." Ooh.
TV HOST: So you're saying Representative Maloof, progressive darling, until recently a man who name was being floated as a senatorial candidate, tried to murder his younger - brother's fiancée.
HOST: Is that correct?
I'm saying Congressman Maloof did murder his brother's fiancée.
HOST: His brother was standing right next to her.
Are you saying he wanted to kill his brother as well?
The bomb was in the makeup bag, which showed up unexpectedly and at the last minute.
It was supposed to go off in the room where all the college girls were staying.
HOST: This is really a provocative claim.
I assume you have something to back it up?
Well, I was there.
And I know for a fact that the Maloof family tried to pay Tawny Carr to end her engagement to Alex Maloof.
My thoughts exactly.
USNN is rerunning this interview every minutes.
Tomorrow is going to be a very interesting day.
HOST: ... trying to murder his younger brother's fiancée?
PENN: I'm saying Congressman Maloof did...
Think the boss wants us to kill a congress...
The bomb was in the makeup bag...
What do we do about King Pargusky?
PENN: ... at the last minute.
It was supposed to go off in the room where all the college girls were staying...
VERONICA: Guess one of us is gonna need to follow pizza guy on Twitter.
That'd be you.
You don't really think the Middle Eastern JFK decides to murder his brother's fiancée with a bomb.
Then hires, arguably, the best father-daughter private detectives in all of greater Balboa County, to do what, not find out he did it?
- Come on.
Makes no sense.
- KEITH: No.
But there's something about him that's off.
He's being cagey.
Logan, oh, my God.
I got the check.
[LOGAN CLICKS TONGUE]
I didn't want you to murder him for it.
- Logan, whose blood is that?
- Some hillbilly's.
So guess what.
We're kinda like co-workers now.
I just accepted a job as the head of Congressman Maloof's one-man security detail.