01x01 - Pilot

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Bones". Aired September 2005 - March 2017.*
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A forensic anthropologist and a cocky FBI agent build a team to investigate death causes. And quite often, there isn't more to examine than rotten flesh or mere bones.
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01x01 - Pilot

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"Pilot"
Episode 1x01
Written By: Hart Hanson
Directed by: Greg Yaitanes
Transcribed by: Cassie

Disclaimer: The characters, plotlines, quotes, etc. included here are owned by Hart Hanson, all rights reserved. This transcript is not authorized or endorsed by Hart Hanson or Fox.

[Opening scene has a well dressed woman rushing toward an arrivals board in a busy airport]

Angela: I'm late...

[Looking up at a malfunctioning arrivals board]

Angela: This board is broken. The arrivals board is not working. Uh, did anybody meet the flight from Guatemala? Aviateca airlines? What gate? Yeah, right. I'm late.

[Stepping up to a customer service desk]

Angela: Excuse me, uh, you have a computer glitch at the arrivals board.

[Customer service agent ignores her]

Angela: Hello! Sir, excuse me, yoo-hoo...

[Customer service guy holds up a finger to silence her]

Angela: Great.

[She rips open her shirt revealing a lacy bustier, getting young guy's attention]

Angela: Yeah. Hi. The flight from Guatemala?

[Off Angela to Brennan]

Temp: Tell me you tried 'excuse me' first.

Angela: Sweeeeetie. Yes, I did. [Hugging Temp] Welcome home. Are you exhausted? Was Guatemala awful? Was it horribly backward?

Temp: And yet I was never reduced to flashing my boobs for information.

Angela: Flash them for any fun reasons?

Temp: I was literally neck deep in a mass grave, not romantic.

Angela: You know, diving in a pit of cadavers is no way to handle a messy break up.

Temp: Angela, nothing Pete and I ever did was messy.

Angela: [Laughing] Then you were not doing the right things.

[Brennan suddenly turns, dropping her bag, to confront a man dressed in a suit who has been following the two ladies as they walked through the airport]

Temp: Sir, why are you following us?

[The unknown man reaches out to take Brennan's arm. Moving quickly, Brennan subdues the man with some strategic kicks and punches]

Angela: att*ck! Security! Hello!?! Who runs this airport? [Angela joins in to the fight by hitting the man with her purse] Kick his ass sweetie!

Police Officer: Police! Mam, step back now!

Temp: He att*cked me!?!

Guy: I'm Homeland Security!

Angela: Oh, little misunderstanding here.

Temp: [Hands in the air] You can put away your g*ns.

Guy: What is she in charge now? No. I'll tell you when you can lower your weapons. [To Brennan] Hand over the bag.

Temp: [Reaching down to retrieve the bag] Is that what this is about?

[Homeland Security agent opens the bag to reveal a skull]

Temp: Boo.

[Cut to profile view of the skull, fade to Brennan sitting at a table]

Temp: I am Doctor Temperance Brennan. I've been in Guatemala for two months identifying victims of genocide including him. [Gesturing to the skull]

Agent: Most people in this situation, what they do is, they sweat it.

Temp: Guatemala, genocide? How are you scary after that?

Agent: You know who doesn't sweat it?

[Cut to female agent who is also in the room]

Agent 2: Sociopaths.

Temp: I am not a sociopath, I'm an anthropologist at the Jeffersonian.

Agent: Who works for the FBI. Which I'd maybe believe if you had an ID that did more than allowed you access to the cafeteria.

[Behind Brennan, another man in a suit enters the room carrying a book]

Agent: You were illegally transporting human remains mam and you assaulted a Homeland Security agent.

Temp: Look, I'm sorry if I embarrassed you in front of your friends but, next time you should identify yourself before attacking me. [Turning to the man at the door] What are you doing here?

Booth: [To the Agent] FBI. Special Agent Seeley Booth, Major Crime Investigation, D.C. Bones identifies bodies for us.

Temp: Don't call me Bones. And I do more than identify.

Booth: [Holding up the book, then sliding it across the table to the other Agent] She also writes books.

Agent: [Picking up the book, he looks at it noting Brennan's name] Fine. She's all yours.

Booth: [To Brennan] Great. Let's grab your skull and let's vamoose.

Temp: What! That's it? She's all yours? Why did you stop me?

Booth: Why does it matter? You're free to go. Let's just grab your bags, click, click, clang, clang...

Temp: [To Booth] You set me up. [To Agent] You got a hold for questioning request from the FBI didn't you? [Agent looks to Booth, Brennan looks at Booth incredulously, Booth knows he's been found out]

Agent: I love this book. [Hands it back to Brennan]

Temp: [Grabbing the book and then the skull, Brennan st*lks past Booth who is holding all of her bags] Come on.

[Cut to the inside of an SUV, Booth is driving, Brennan is in the passenger seat]

Temp: That's the best you can do?

Booth: What?

Temp: Getting Homeland Security to snatch me so that you can stage a fake rescue.

Booth: Well, at least I picked you up at the airport huh? [Gives her a charming little grin which only annoys Brennan more] Hey, come on. I went through the appropriate channels but your assistant there, he stonewalled me!

Temp: Yeah, well after the last case I told Zach to never, ever to put you through. He's a good assistant. You can let me out anywhere along here.

Booth: Alright, listen. A decomposed corpse was found this morning at Arlington National Cemetery down...

Temp: Arlington National Cemetery is full of decomposed corpses, it's... a cemetery.

Booth: Yeah, but this one is your type of corpse, it wasn't in a casket.

Temp: If you drive one more block, I'm screaming 'kidnap' out the window.

Booth: Do you know what, I'm trying to mend bridges here.

Temp: Pull over.

[Cut to SUV pulling over, Brennan and Booth both leaving the vehicle]

Temp: I'm going home. [Walking quickly away form Booth who is following]

Booth: Great! Could we... Look, could we just skip this part?

Temp: I find you very condescending.

Booth: Me! I'm condescending. I'm not the one who's got to mention that she's got a Doctorate every, five, minutes.

Temp: I am the one with the Doctorate.

Booth: Yeah, well you know what? I'm the one with the badge and the g*n huh. You know, you're not the only forensic anthropologist in town.

Temp: [Laughing] Yes I am. The next nearest is in Montreal. Parlez-vous francais?

Booth: What's it going to take?

Temp: [Stopping and turning to face him] Full participation in the case.

Booth: Fine.

Temp: Not just lab work, everything.

Booth: What? Do you want me to spit in my hand? We're Scully and Mulder.

Temp: I don't know what that means.

Booth: It's an olive branch, just get back in the car.

[Cut to Arlington National Cemetery, Brennan and Booth walking down a grassy hill, filled with row upon row of headstones, toward a large pond]

Temp: What's the context of the find?

Booth: Routine landscaping, dropped a load in the local pond, one of the workmen thought he saw something.

[Cut to van door with Jeffersonian Medico-Legal Lab emblem, closes to reveal Zach Addy, Brennan's assistant]

Temp: Hi Zach.

Zach: This eco-warrior look works for you.

Temp: Thanks.

Zach: Very action oriented.

Temp: Agent Booth, you remember my assistant Zach Addy?

Booth: Oh yeah...

Zach: [To Brennan] How was Guatemala? Dig up lots of massacred victims? Learn a thing or two about machete strikes?

Temp: Zach, I need water samples and temperature readings from the pond.

Zach: Right away Dr. Brennan.

Booth: He's got no sense of discretion that kid. Typical Squint...

Temp: I don't know what that means.

Booth: When cops get stuck, we bring in people like you. You know? Squints. You know, you squint at things.

Temp: Oh, you mean people with very high IQ's and basic reasoning skills.

Booth: [Looking chastised] Yeah.

[Cut to Brennan and Booth on a boat in the middle of the pond, dropping an underwater camera that feeds to a video screen on the boat]

Temp: What exactly am I supposed to be squinting at?

Booth: Oh you know, it's like p*rn, you'll know it when you see it.

[Cut to the video screen that shows a skeleton under water, wrapped in what looks like chicken wire]

Temp: Yeah okay. This is a crime scene.

[Cut to opening credits]

[Open next scene with Brennan examining the skeleton on the shore, seems to be late at night, Zach taking pictures of the skeleton]

Temp: Remains are wrapped in four-milled, flat poly-construction sheeting.

Zach: PVC coated chicken wire.

Temp: Weighted. That's why the body didn't surface during decomposition. The skeleton is complete but the skull is in fragments.

Booth: [Joining Brennan and Zach at the body] What can you tell me?

Temp: Not much. She was a young woman, probably between 18 and 22, approximately 5'3", race unknown, delicate features.

Booth: [Sarcastically] That's all?

Temp: Tennis player.

Booth: How do you get a pretty tennis player out of that yuck?

Zach: Epiphyses fusion gives age, pelvic bone shape gives sex...

Temp: Bursitis in the shoulder, somebody this young, must be an athletic injury.

Booth: When did she die?

Temp: Ehhhh.....

Booth: [Mocking] Ehhhh... What does that even mean?

Zach: Means wait until our bug and slime guy takes a look.

Temp: No clothing.

Booth: You know, in my line of work, no clothes usually means a sex crime.

Temp: In my line of work, it could also mean the victim favored natural fibers.

Zach: [To Booth] Your suit, for example, will outlast your bones by decades.

Temp: [To Zach] Collect silt, 3 meters radius, to a depth of 10 cm. [To Booth] Your FBI forensics team can take the plastic and the chicken wire, we'll take the rest.

[Cut to exterior sh*t of the Jeffersonian, fade to Brennan and Dr. Goodman walking inside with Zach trailing behind them]

Temp: Dr. Goodman, I wish you wouldn't just give me to the FBI.

Dr. Goodman: As a federally funded institution, the Jeffersonian must seize every opportunity to prove our worth to our friends in Congress which means, I loan you out as I see fit, especially to federal agencies.

Temp: 'Loan out' implies property Dr. Goodman and the FBI will never respect me as property.

Dr. Goodman: I do not view you as property Dr. Brennan, you are one of the Jeffersonian's most valuable assets.

Zach: An asset is, by definition, property.

Dr. Goodman: What's the rule Mr. Addy?

Zach: [Sighing] You only converse with PhD's. You realize I am half way through two Doctorates? Two halves make a whole, so mathematically speaking...

Dr. Goodman: Go polish a bone Mr. Addy!

[Leaving Zach behind, Dr. Goodman and Temp enter an atrium in the museum]

Temp: Dr. Goodman. FBI agents will never respect any of us as long as you simply dole out scientists like office temps.

Dr. Goodman: Dr. Brennan, are you playing me ?

Temp: You know I'm no good at that.

Dr. Goodman: Mmmm. Thus far, but you have a disturbingly steep learning curve.

[Cut to the Medico-Legal Lab at the Jeffersonian]

Hodgins: The pond is not only warm and teeming with microbes, which accelerated decomposition, but it houses black carp and coy which fed on the body.

Angela: Can I, as the only normal person in this room, say, Ew?

Hodgins: I got three larval stages of trichoptera, chironimidae...

Temp: As we cut to the chase....

Hodgins: The body was in the pond one winter and two summers.

Temp: Spring before last.

Hodgins: You really think I'm Lesty?

[Looking confused, Temp turns to Angela]

Angela: The book.

Temp: No, No, No. You're not in the book.

Zach: Sure he is! We all are...

Temp: No, none of you are in the book. Those are fictitious characters based on....

Hodgins: [Interrupting and referring to a computer screen showing the ribcage of the victim] I found some small bone fragments in the silt.

Angela: [To Brennan] We're out of the book now, we're back in real life...

Hodgins: I guess Rana Temporaria.

Temp: Frog bones...

Hodgins: Also some tiny gold links, those from a fine chain...

Zach: [To Brennan] Point of clarification, I'm not a virgin. Nowhere near in fact.

Angela: Who you captured perfectly, is Booth. Buttoned down but buckets of sexual confidence which, uhhh, I for one would love to tap.

Zack: It's not right to discuss tapping asses in front of a soaker.

Temp: I can't bounce back and forth between my book and real life. Since we're stuck with real life let's just forget the book.

Hodgins: I haven't analyzed whatever it was the victim was holding in her hand but it looks like cellulose.

Angela: Paper?

Hodgins: Possibly.

Temp: I found microscopic grit embedded in the skull fragments, I need you to identify those too. [To Zach] Remove the remaining tissue, I'll debreed the skull fragments myself, reassemble it so Angela can put a face on our victim.

Angela: Good. I prefer holographs, they don't stink.

[The group begins to disperse as Brennan walks over to Zach, strains of Howie Day's, Collide begin in the background]

Temp: Zach, I don't like those terms for human remains; soaker, crispy critter...

Zach: Sorry Dr. Brennan.

[As the music continues to play you see Brennan alone in the lab reconstructing the skull piece by piece. This continues through the night to a sh*t of her asleep on the exam table the next morning as Zach places a cup of coffee in front of her and she wakes. Cut to Brennan walking across the lawn of the Jeffersonian carrying her luggage from the day before. Next cut to Booth sitting in an office facing an older gentleman, his boss, Deputy Director Cullen]

Cullen: So, you guaranteed a squint a field role in an active m*rder investigation.

Booth: Yes sir.

Cullen: The one that wrote the book.

Booth: Yes sir.

Cullen: Thought you said that she wouldn't work with you anymore.

Booth: Well, the last case we worked she provided a description of the m*rder w*apon and the m*rder*r but I didn't give her much credence.

Cullen: Why not?

Booth: Because she did it by looking at the victim's autopsy x-rays.

Cullen: [Snort] Well I wouldn't give it much credence either.

Booth: Turns out she was right on both plus the pond victim, Brennan gives me the victim's age, sex and favourite sport.

Cullen: [Chuckling] Which is?

Booth: Tennis.

Cullen: [In awe] She's good.

Booth: Oh, she's amazing. If the only way I can get her back to my side is to bring her out in the field, I'm willing.

Cullen: Well, Squints like to stay safe, back at the lab. What's with Brennan?

Booth: Remember a case back in the early 90's, a couple goes missing on the interstate, car was found at a rest stop?

Cullen: Yeah. Upstate New York, upstanding citizens, nobody found anything...

Booth: Those are Brennan's parents.

Cullen: [Thinking] Fine. She's on you. Take a Squint out in the field, she's your responsibility.

Booth: Thank you sir.

[Cut to Brennan asleep, in what we can only assume is, her own bed. Hearing a sound her eyes open and she scrambles over the side of the bed to retrieve a bat she had hidden underneath. Quietly slipping down the hall, she holds that bat up in case she needs a w*apon. As a man walks through a bead curtain she slams the bat into the front of the TV he's carrying.]

Temp: [Holding the bat in the air, she looks down at the guy she has knocked out] Peter?

[Cut to Brennan carrying a mug of coffee then handing it to Peter]

Temp: It's not rational for you to choose the first day I'm back to reclaim your television.

Peter: While you were away, I thought a lot about why we broke up.

Temp: We fought all the time and don't like each other anymore.

Peter: We fought because you are emotionally distant and cold but sexually speaking, I think you'll agree...

Temp: [Interrupting] You didn't come for your TV, you timed this for a booty call!

[Standing and taking the coffee from Peter, she begins pushing him down the hall toward the front door]

Temp: OK, you're leaving.

Peter: Your intimacy issues are probably due to being orphaned so young.

Temp: Ughh... I hate psychology and you're just horny.

Peter: Brennan, do you really want to spend the rest of your life alone?

Temp: Ok, I don't know about the rest of my life but I sure as hell wish I was alone right now.

[Reaching the door, Brennan pushes Peter out and he turns to face her]

Peter: So what, we split the cost of the TV?

Temp: Goodbye.

[Brennan slams the door in his face and the phone begins to ring]

Temp: [Picking up the phone] What?

[Cut to Medico-Legal Lab at the Jeffersonian, Angela's office. Booth is considering a large piece of art on her wall]

Booth: This is interesting, Angela.

Temp: [Entering the room] Good morning. Does Booth know how this works?

Angela: This computer program, which I designed, patent pending, accepts a full array of digital input, processes it and then projects it as a three dimensional holographic image.

Booth: OK.

Temp: [To Booth] You get that?

Booth: [Ever the smart ass] Yeah, that and the patent pending part.

Angela: Brennan reassembled the skull and applied tissue markers.

Temp: [Looking at the Angelator with Hodgins, Booth and Zach] Her skull was badly damaged, but racial indicators, cheekbone dimensions, nasal arch, occipital measurements suggest African American.

Angela: And.... We have our victim. [A full upper body photograph appears in holograph form on the Angelator]

Booth: [Whispering, wiggles his fingers through the hologram] Whoa... Have to admit, that's pretty cool.

Temp: [Removing Booth's hand] Ang, rerun the program substituting Caucasian values.

[The image alters slightly]

Temp: Does she look familiar to anyone?

Booth: [Shaking his head in disbelief] No...

Temp: [To Angela] Split the difference, mixed race.

Angela: Lenny Kravitz or Vanessa Williams?

Temp: I don't know what that means.

[Angela makes the change and the image is altered again, and Booth is taken aback]

Temp: Angela, reduce tissue depth over the cheekbones to the jaw line.

[Booth looks from the skull to the image]

Temp: Does anyone recognize her?

Zach: Not me.

Angela: Wait, is that who I think it is?

Zach: The girl who had the affair with the Senator?

Booth: Her name is Cleo Louise Eller. Only daughter to Ted and Sharon Eller. Last seen approximately 9pm, April 6, 2003 leaving the Cardio Deluxe Gym on K Street, she didn't even make it to her car.

Temp: [To Booth] Pretty good memory.

Booth: Yeah well, it's my job to find her.

Hodgins: Well, in that case, congratulations on your success.

Booth: This isn't exactly the way I wanted it to end.

[Cut to the Squints eating lunch on some steps outside the Jeffersonian]

Booth: Cleo Eller is not just some missing girl.

Hodgins: Yeah, she's a senate intern who was boinking Senator Allen Bethlehem.

Booth: I was secondary in the investigation to the disappearance of that girl and we couldn't confirm that.

[Cut to pictures from Cleo Eller's file]

Booth: [To Brennan] How did you recognize her before she even had her own face?

Temp: I recognized the underlying architecture of her features, the rest is just window dressing.

Zach: [To Brennan] I'm not an expert but, shouldn't he be happier?

Booth: Oh no, believe me, I'm happy.

Hodgins: He's not happy because Senator Bethlehem chairs the Senate Committee overseeing the FBI.

Angela: You seem happy to me.

Booth: [To Angela, Hodgins and Zach] I need this kept quiet.

Hodgins: Ha! Cover up!

Booth: [Walking down the steps away from the other Squints with Brennan following] Paranoid conspiracy theory.

Hodgins: Is it paranoia that Monica Lewinsky was a KGB trained sex agent mole?

Temp: [Walking beside Booth across the Jeffersonian lawn] So what do you do first, confront the Senator?

Booth: Listen, Bones, I know...

Temp: [Interrupting] Don't call me Bones!

Booth: I know we talked about you coming out in the field and all...

Temp: Ughh.. You Rat Bastard!

Booth: A case this big and the Director is going to create a special investigation and if I line all my ducks up in a row I could maybe, maybe I can head it up.

Temp: I don't know what that means but I think I could be a duck.

Booth: You're not a duck ok! On this one we stick to the book. Cops on the street, Squints in the lab.

Temp: Well in that case, the Jeffersonian will be issuing a press release identifying the girl in the pond.

Booth: You do that, I'm a dead duck. What are you trying to do?

Temp: Blackmail you.

Booth: Blackmail a Federal Agent?

Temp: Yes.

Booth: I don't like it.

Temp: I'm fairly certain you're not supposed to.

Booth: Fine. You're in.

[Cut to Cullen's office]

Cullen: You're certain it's Cleo Eller.

Temp: The profile's dead on, age, race, height...

Booth: Plus the timeline fits, I mean Cleo Eller did play tennis in college.

Cullen: Talk to me about the Senator.

Booth: [Handing Cullen a photo of Bethlehem] Cleo Eller, the victim, worked for Senator Bethlehem...

Temp: It was reported that they were involved sexually.

Booth: We couldn't confirm that.

Cullen: Oh Bethlehem's a hound, everybody knows that.

Booth: [Handing Cullen another photo] Ken Thompson, Cleo's boyfriend.

Cullen: Thompson's still Bethlehem's aid. Thompson keeps Bethlehem's calendar, no way the Senator has an affair that Thompson doesn't know about. No sexual relationship, no motive. What about the ahh, nutcase?

Booth: [Handing Cullen yet another photo] Oliver Laurier.

Cullen: You like him for this?

Booth: Well he's a stalker.

Cullen: What's your first move?

Booth: I'd like to inform the Eller's that we found their daughter.

Cullen: It's better to keep this quiet, it's been what, two years? What's another few of days?

Booth: With all due respect sir, I've come to know the family pretty well, especially the Major and two years is a hell of a long time in my book.

Temp: [Absorbing everything going on around her jumps in to help] I'll have details of cause of death by this afternoon.

Booth: [To Brennan] Then that's where we'll get started.
[Cut to Booth and Brennan back in the SUV, Booth driving, Brennan looking at Jeffersonian file with small sample bottle in her hand]

Brennan: Hodgins identified the particulates embedded in Cleo Eller's skull as rolled steel most likely from a sledge typed hammer also there's concrete and diatomaceous earth.

Booth: What's that?

Brennan: [Handing Booth the sample bottle with a white powder inside] Looks like that. It's made up of prehistoric sea creatures, it's used as an insecticide, filtering agent, cleaning abrasive, ceramics... It's very common.

Booth: Diatomaceous earth. Common or not, it's a clue.

[Cut to Booth and Brennan sitting in a very formal living room with Cleo Eller's parents]

Mr. Eller: You're positive it's our Cleo.

Brennan: We established 22 matching points of comparison...

Booth: [Cutting Brennan off and giving her a stern look] Yes. We're certain.

Mr. Eller: Did he do it? The Senator. One m*llitary man to another.

Booth: Major Eller, we can't discuss the investigation in any way.

Mrs. Eller: Can you at least tell us if our daughter suffered?

Brennan: Given the state of her skull...

Booth: [Another dirty look to Brennan] Cleo never saw it coming.

Mr. Eller: Thank you.

Brennan: Mrs. Eller, can you tell us what Cleo wore around her neck?

Mrs. Eller: Her father's Bronze Star. Ted won it in the first Gulf w*r then, he gave it to her for luck. [Mrs. Eller then breaks down and Booth looks to Brennan]

[Cut to outside the Eller's home, Booth and Brennan getting back into the SUV.]

Brennan: Those people deserved the truth.

Booth: Their daughter was m*rder*d, they deserve the kindness of a lie.

Brennan: There'll be an inquest report.

Booth: Which they won't read because they don't want to, especially because toward the end, Cleo and her parents weren't even speaking.

Brennan: They told you that?

Booth: You know, getting information out of live people is a lot different than getting information out of a pile of bones, you have to offer up something of yourself first.

Bones: What exactly did you do in the m*llitary?

Booth: See? See what you did right there Bones? You asked a personal question without offering anything personal in return and since I'm not a skeleton, you get zilch. Sorry.

[Cut to Brennan and Zach back at the Medico Legal lab in the Jeffersonian]

Brennan: There are s*ab marks here and odd markings on the distal phalanges. Nothing I've seen before.

Hodgins: In a nutshell; anxious, depressed and nauseous.

Brennan: Take a sick day.

Hodgins: Not me. Cleo Eller. Pupal casings show that she was on Lorazepam, Chloradiazepoxide, and Meclizine Hydrochloride.

Brennan: Nausea. Show me those bone fragments.

[Cut to screen showing bone fragments enlarged.]

Brennan: These aren't frog bones, Cleo Eller was pregnant.

Zach: Fetal remains....

Brennan: Malleus, Incus, Stapes, these are fetal ear bones.

Hodgins: The girl was pregnant.

Brennan: Not very far along.

Zach: Do you want to try to get a DNA reading see if we can prove paternity?

Brennan: You can try, lets hope there's enough genetic material to test.

Hodgins: This Senator, ahhh he is smart. He gets an intern pregnant and then murders her when it threatens his career and he has the connections to get away with it.

Brennan: I hate it when you make paranoia plausible, it's like sliding off a cliff.

Hodgins: Special Unit? No way your FBI pal heads it up unless the dark powers in charge are convinced he knows where his political bread is buttered. Either way, this is where this investigation ends.

[Beautiful by Lifehouse begins to play and we cut to Brennan leaning on a swinging partition located at the Jeffersonian in one of the hallways, thinking. Angela joins her...]

Angela: Want to get a drink? Non-topical application. Glug, glug, Woo hoo! [In a softer voice] Come on Sweetie...

[The two begin walking down the hallway]

Brennan: What if Booth's right. What if I'm only good with bones and lousy with people?

Angela: People like you.

Brennan: I don't care if men like me.

Angela: [Chuckling wryly] Okay, interesting leap from people to men but I'm sure it means nothing.

Brennan: I hate psychology. [Chuckling disbelievingly] My most meaningful relationships are with dead people!

Angela: Who said that.

Brennan: [Sitting down on a bench] It's true! I understand Cleo, and her bones are all I've ever seen. When she was seven, she broke her wrist probably falling off a bike and two weeks later, before the cast was even removed, she got right back on that bike and broke it all over again. And when she was being m*rder*d, she fought back hard, even though she was so depressed she could hardly get up in the morning. She didn't welcome death, Cleo wanted to live.

Angela: Honey, you ever think you come off kind of distant because you connect too much?

Brennan: I hate psychology, it's a soft science.

Angela: I know but, people are mostly soft.

Brennan: Except for their bones.

Angela: Yeah... You want some advice?

Brennan: [Sarcastically] Glug, glug, woo hoo...

Angela: Offer up a little bit of yourself every once and awhile. Just... tell somebody something you're not completely certain you want them to know.

Brennan: [Laughing] God! That's the second time I've received that advice.

Angela: Well, you know I give great advice.

Brennan: I'm gonna have to push this to the next level.

[Cut to the Hart Office Building of the US Senate. Brennan is meeting with Thompson and Senator Bethlehem in an atrium of sorts]

Thompson: I'm a little confused as to why the Director of the FBI would send you to speak to the Senator instead of coming himself.

Brennan: Probably because I'm the one who found out that Cleo Eller was pregnant.

Bethlehem: You can tell the girl was pregnant from her skeleton?

Brennan: We found fetal bones, The only question now, Senator, is which one of you is the father. Are you willing to submit to a DNA test?

Thompson: [To Bethlehem] You know what, given the sensitivity, don't say anything on the subject without your attorney present. That's my advice.

Bethlehem: Advice I intend to take. Ken, we have a vote to get to.

[The Senator tosses some gum into a trash can and Brennan runs to retrieve it.]

Bethlehem: Ummm, hehe, what are you doing?

Brennan: Saliva, say from chewing gum, is an excellent source of DNA. I intend to compare it to the DNA in the fetal bones.

Bethlehem: You need a warrant for that. Ken, she needs a warrant.

[Thompson walks up to Brennan and grabs her wrist intending to take the gum however, she turns and swiftly elbows him in the stomach causing him to drop to the floor.]

Brennan: [As she is walking out of the building she turns to the men] If we have any further questions, we'll be in touch.

Bethlehem: Ken, you okay?

[Cut to Cullen, in his office, standing with his arms crossed looking very pissed.]

Cullen: When you work for the FBI Dr. Brennan, you're a Federal Agent, government property, I own you.

Brennan: I'm not certain that's accurate sir.

Cullen: Well how's this for accurate. I could place you under arrest on a Federal charge right now for uttering threats against a United States Senator.

Brennan: What...

Booth: Bones...

Cullen: [To Booth] I own her, but she was your responsibility.

Booth: Yes sir.

Cullen: [Speaking to the intercom] Send in Special Agent First. [To Booth] I warned you about taking squints out to the field but you vouched for her, said she wouldn't screw up.

Booth: Yes sir.

Cullen: She accosted a Senator, assaulted his aid, that counts as screwing things up.

Brennan: No! No! Booth didn't know I was going to see the Senator, I wanted to get a sample of his DNA.

Cullen: [To Booth] Exactly.

Booth: Not helping....

[Agent First enters the office as Cullen sits down behind his desk.}

Cullen: Tomorrow morning I'm announcing the formation of a special unit to investigate the m*rder of Cleo Eller at which time your investigation will be officially terminated. [To Booth] You will not head the new unit.

Booth: [Addressing Agent first without looking at him and not trying to hide the disdain from his voice] Congratulations Patrick.

Agent First: No hard feelings.

Booth: Right.

Agent First: I need the complete case files in the morning.

Booth: Of course, they'll be ready.

Cullen: Thank you Agent First.

Booth: [Getting up to leave] At least Dr. Brennan found out that the Senator Bethlehem was having sex with Cleo.

Brennan: I did?

Cullen: [To Booth] Report said there wasn't enough DNA in the fetal bones to determine paternity.

Booth: Senator Bethlehem didn't want Dr. Brennan to take that gum, he's hiding something.

Brennan: [To Cullen] He didn't know there wasn't enough DNA.

Cullen: I suggest you ummm, go back to your lab Dr. Brennan and get used to being there.

Booth: Come on Bones... [As they are leaving Cullen's office] You okay?

Brennan: Don't be nice to me after I got you in trouble.

Booth: Your heart was in the right place.

Brennan: No, I'm not a heart person, you're a heart person, I'm a brain person. You vouched for me.

Booth: Forget it...

Brennan: No, I won't. you think it was the Senator?

Booth: Look, the Senator has had sex with a dozen of these interns and he hasn't k*lled any of them, our best bet is still the stalker.

Brennan: You want to check him out, we can, I don't, what do you call it, roost him?

Booth: [Smirking] Rouse.

Brennan: Rouse. Well the m*rder*r snatched a Bronze Star from Cleo's neck so...

Booth: I've got twelve hours before this case is over and I'm off it so, let's go rouse.

[Cut to Brennan at Oliver Laurier's door, he has the door opened as far as the security chain will allow]

Brennan: Mr. Laurier, we have a warrant to search your apartment....

[The door slams in her face and Oliver turns to run but is stopped by Booth who grabs him by the wrist and puts him to the floor]

Booth: [Calmly] Don't run Oliver.

[Cut to Oliver who is reading the warrant thoroughly as Booth is taking a look around the apartment]

Brennan: Agent Booth is under the impression that you may have something that is pertinent to a case he is working on.

Oliver: You're looking for a Bronze Star? Like the one that Cleo wore?

Brennan: Exactly like that one Mr. Laurier.

Oliver: I don't have it.

Brennan: Sometimes stalkers retain keepsakes.

Booth: [Picking up a tiny booklet] What the hell are these things huh?

Oliver: Miniature lives of the Saints, I hand them out....

Booth: [Tossing one at Brennan] Heads up Bones.

Oliver: [To Booth] I hand them out for donations, I'm not a panhandler, help yourself. [To Brennan] I never stalked Cleo.

Brennan: Then why did she get a restraining order?

Oliver: Okay, okay, no. First of all no. Ken Thompson, her supposed boyfriend, got the restraining order with his boss, the Senator but Ken is only concerned with his job and his tropical fish. They colluded to ruin my reputation with this specious, stalker label when in actuality, I was Cleo's close friend.

Brennan: Then why'd you run from the warrant?

Oliver: My fight or flight response is heavily weighted toward flight. If there is anything I can do to help you catch Cleo's k*ller, just tell me.

Booth: Oh! Full confession, that would be great.

Oliver: I love Cleo. Why would I hurt her?

Brennan: If you don't mind, I'm gonna keep one of these little books.

Oliver: Whatever you need, Dr. Brennan.

[As Brennan leaves Booth narrows his eyes at Oliver contemplating the new infatuation that Oliver has formed. Cut to the Jeffersonian, Angela's office, looking at the holograph of Cleo Eller]

Angela: This is a rough composite but, you get the idea.

Brennan: Skull trauma was not the cause of death, Cleo was stabbed first. She was stabbed 5 to 8 times with a m*llitary issued K-Bar Kn*fe.

Angela: And I just completed this rendering. The defensive wounds to the bones of her hands suggest that it wasn't until the third or the fourth penetration that....

Brennan: [Interrupting and referring to the simulation of Cleo being stabbed] That's likely the fatal s*ab right there.

Angela: ..that Cleo stopped fighting back.

Brennan: I believe that the distinctive damage to her distal phalanges, the tips of her finger bones, was caused by the m*rder*r using a Kn*fe to remove her finger pads. Cranial fragmentation suggests a 20lb hammer striking four to five times while the victims head rested on a cement floor containing traces of diatomaceous earth, that's the best explanation for the particulates found in her skull. This was not a crime of passion.

Angela: Cleo never saw the first s*ab coming, it didn't arise out of an argument. Why smash Cleo's face, why whittle away her finger tips, remove her clothing and her jewelry?

Zach: Sink her body.

Brennan: The m*rder*r put more effort into hiding the victim's identity than he did into the m*rder itself.

Hodgins: In case Cleo was identified, the m*rder*r planted evidence. The little book that Brennan got from the stalker matches the cellulose I found in Cleo's hand.

Angela: m*llitary cemetery, m*llitary Kn*fe implicate her own father. More misdirection.

Hodgins: Sound like any conniving, son-of-bitch senators you know?

Booth: You expect me, to declare w*r on a United States Senator based on your little holographic crystal ball.

Brennan: It's not magic. It's a logical recreation of events based on evidence.

Booth: No more valid than my gut.

Zach: A good hypothesis withstands testing that's what makes it a good hypothesis.

Booth: It's not a hypothesis, you have a dead girl and a United States Senator. This is exactly why squints belong in the lab, you guys don't know anything about the real world.

Brennan: [Glaring at Booth as she leaves Angela's office] Come on, we're done here.

Booth: [To Angela, who stayed in her office] Wow. Touchy...

Angela: You must know about her family. Both parents vanish when she's fifteen? Probably counts as the real world.

Booth: Yeah. I know the story, read the file, cops never found out anything.

Angela: Yeah. Brennan figures that if maybe somebody like her had been there...

Booth: For someone who hate psychology, she sure has a lot of it.

[Cut to Brennan sh**ting a g*n in a f*ring range]

Booth: Thought I'd find you here. You know, you being a good sh*t and doing martial arts, it's all your way of dealing. Who knows better than you how fragile life can be?

Brennan: Maybe an Army Ranger sn*per who became an FBI homicide investigator?

Booth: Ah, you looked me up, huh? [Referring to the g*n] Do you mind?

Brennan: Be my guest.

Booth: Thank You.

[Booth picks up the g*n and purposely makes a lousy sh*t]

Brennan: [Chuckling] Were you any good at being a sn*per?

Booth: A sn*per gets to know a little something about K*llers. Senator Bethlehem, he's no k*ller.

Brennan: Oh, and Oliver Laurier is?

Booth: [Backing Brennan against the wall of the f*ring booth, he gets right in her face] The way I read Laurier, he's unhinged. That makes him dangerous.

Brennan: That'd be your gut telling you that, correct?

Booth: You know, homicides, they're not solved by scientists. They're solved by guys like me asking a thousand questions a thousand times, catching people telling lies every time. You're great at what you do, Bones, but you don't solve murders, cops do.

Brennan: Cleo Eller was k*lled on a cement floor sprinkled with diatomaceous earth. Traces of her blood will still be in that cement. One of us is wrong, maybe both of us. But if Bethlehem wasn't a Senator, you'd be right there in his basement looking for that k*lling floor. You're afraid of him. Your hypothesis is that squints don't solve murders and cops do, prove it. Be a cop.

[Smirking, Brennan turns and leaves. Booth picks up the g*n and fires two quick sh*ts with his own g*n. Camera fades to show both being perfect k*ll sh*ts. Cut to Booth sitting at his desk watching home video of Cleo Eller and her family while by plays. Brennan knocks on the door and clears her throat]

Booth: They look pretty happy, don't they. Otherwise they wouldn't turn on the camera I guess.

Brennan: Zach said you wanted to see me?

Booth: That something you don't like to talk about? Families? Temperance, partners they, share things, builds trust.

Brennan: Since when are we partners?

Booth: I apologize for the assumption. [Hands Brennan a piece of paper]

Brennan: You got a warrant to search Bethlehem's place?

Booth: You were right. If Bethlehem wasn't a Senator, I'd be in that basement, looking for that k*lling floor. But you're wrong, I was never afraid of that guy and I'm not doing this because you're a genius, I'm doing this for Cleo.

[Cut to a media circus outside Senator Bethlehem's mansion]

Thompson: The warrant says they're searching for blood traces, a sledgehammer and diatomaceous earth.

Bethlehem: What the hell is that?

[Thompson angrily storms up to Brennan]

Thompson: You're making a big mistake.

[Brennan ignores him and looks over to where Booth is in a heated conversation with Agent First. Sensing she is being watched, she turns to see Oliver Laurier behind the gate]

Brennan: What are you doing here?

Oliver: Look at him, for all his politics he's got nothing. He should have loved Cleo properly like I would have. Will you sign my book?

Brennan: Stalk me Oliver and I will Kick. Your. Ass.

[Cut to a sledgehammer being removed from the Senators home in an evidence bag]

Bethlehem: I don't recognize that, that is not mine. That is not mine!

Brennan: [To Booth as he walks up to her] At least we got the hammer.

Booth: Yeah but that's all we got.

Brennan: The cement floor in the basement?

Booth: Yeah, no blood, diatomaceous earth. We needed a trifecta Bones. Physical evidence, m*rder w*apon, crime scene...

[Cut to all of the squints drinking alcohol out of beakers in the lounge back at the Jeffersonian]

Zach: They won't even arrest him?

Hodgins: Don't worry, if that's the hammer used on Cleo Eller, he'll get arrested. A toast to getting this bastard.

Brennan: The hammer's not enough. He's gonna get away with it. And maybe Booth is right, maybe outside the lab I'm useless.

Hodgins: [Holding up Oliver's book] Let's take guidance from the lives of the Saints.

Angels: Albertus Magnus, Patron Saint of Scientists.

Zach: I thought Magnus was the Patron Saint of fish mongers?

Hodgins: Two separate entities. Albertus Magnus was a 13th century philosopher, the fish monger saint was a ...

Brennan: Fish! [Everyone stares at Brennan] You said that diatomaceous earth could be used as a filtering agent.

Hodgins: Yeah, for swimming pools, water filters...

Brennan: Or tropical fish. Oliver Laurier said that Ken Thompson kept fish.

[Jumping up, Brennan begins to rush away]

Angela: What's your hurry?

Brennan: [Turning back] Thompson read the warrant, he knows we're looking for diatomaceous earth. Get in touch with Booth, tell him where I'm going, okay?.

Angela: [To Hodgins] She didn't actually say where she was going, did she?

[Brennan pulls up to Thompson's home and sees him through a window spreading gasoline all over the floor]

Brennan: Stop! You can't destroy evidence.

[Picking up a planter at the front door, Brennan throws it through a glass panel then reaches in to unlock the door. Brennan enters the house]

Thompson: This is a private residence, I don't suppose you have a warrant?

Brennan: I'm working with the FBI, if I have reasonable suspicion of a crime being committed, I don't need a warrant.

Thompson: What crime?

Brennan: Destruction of evidence pertinent to a Federal investigation.

Thompson: I'm just cleaning up. Is that alcohol I smell on your breath?

Brennan: This linoleum looks fairly new, what's underneath, cement? The same cement that was embedded in Cleo's skull when you bashed her head in.

Thompson: You might want to get out of here.

Brennan: I can't let you destroy evidence.

Thompson: How are you going to stop me?

Brennan: I'll stop you.

Thompson: [Laughing] Not before I burn this place down with you in it.

[Brennan quickly pulls her g*n and sh**t Thompson in the leg, then rushes over still holding the g*n on him in order to keep him on the floor]

Brennan: I don't get it, it wasn't jealousy, it wasn't passion, Cleo wouldn't get rid of your boss's baby and so you got rid of her. What kind of psychology is that? What kind of person are you?

[Oliver Laurier appears in the doorway]

Oliver: Temperance. Are you alright?

Brennan: Oliver, I understand you're here out of a misguided concern for my safety but I apparently don't read people very well and you could be in some kind of psychotic collusion with Ken so I'm going to ask you to go over there and apply pressure to his wound until the police get here, you understand?

Oliver: Okay. Okay. Did he k*ll Cleo?

Brennan: Yeah...

Oliver: Okay. Well, I'm down with him bleeding to death.

Brennan: Did I mention that applying pressure to a g*nsh*t wound is extremely painful?

[Cut to Cleo Eller's funeral with Collide by Howie Day playing. All the squints have attended as well as Goodman, Booth and Brennan. Brennan leaves the group to place a rose on Cleo's coffin while the rest watch]

Angela: Is the FBI going to lay charges against Brennan?

Hodgins: She only sh*t him in the leg. Once.

Booth: She didn't give him a warning. She just sh*t him, with alcohol on her breath.

Goodman It was her first sh**ting, you can't expect it to be perfect right out of the gate.

Zach: [To Booth] How much warning did you give people before you sniped them?

[sh**ting Zach a dirty look, Booth leaves the group to catch up with Brennan who is walking across the cemetery toward the road. He catches up with her and falls into step beside her with a smug grin on his face]

Brennan: [Laughing] What?

Booth: Told you it wasn't the Senator.

Brennan: And I told you who it was, so we're even.

Booth: Except we work on the same cases and you end up on the New York Times Best Sellers list.

Brennan: I didn't know that!

Booth: Number Three, with a b*llet.

Brennan: That's good right!?! The New York Times with a b*llet...

Booth: It means you're rich, call your accountant.

Brennan: [Laughing] I don't have an accountant.

Booth: Well get one.

Brennan: Okay, how does that work?

Booth: Ughh, you need to get out of the lab you know, watch TV, turn on the radio, anything! Pick up the phone and....

[Booth stops and looks with Brennan back to the funeral where Mr. and Mrs. Eller are laying roses on their daughter's coffin]

Booth: You know, if it weren't for you, those people would never have known what happened to their daughter. That's got to be worse than the truth.

Brennan: I know exactly how the Eller's felt about Cleo. My parents disappeared when I was fifteen and nobody knows what happened to them.

Booth: You know, being a sn*per I took, a lot of lives, What I'd like to do before I'm done is try and catch at least that many murderers.

Brennan: [Laughing] Please! You don't think there's some kind of cosmic balance sheet... [Catching herself with her foot in her mouth, she stops] I'd like to help you with that.

Booth: [Smirking] Ehhhh....

[Laughing, Brennan smacks Booth on the arm and they begin walking away]

End.
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