01x03 - Down, Down, Down

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Batwoman". Aired October 6, 2019 - current.*
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Three years after Batman disappeared, his cousin Kate Kane sets out to protecting the streets of Gotham City.
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01x03 - Down, Down, Down

Post by bunniefuu »

Previously on "Batwoman"

Seriously, Kate.

You can't be going out in Gotham every night pretending to be Batman.

Catherine Hamilton's investigators found bones, skull fragments of a little girl.

It's Beth.

Who the hell are you?

I'm Alice.

How do you do?

I think Alice is Beth.

I know that you want to believe that Beth is alive.

I do, too, but facts are facts.

My father gave up on me, and I want to make him suffer the way that I did!

"Will you walk a little faster?" Said a whiting to a snail.

"There's a porpoise close behind us, and he's treading on my tail.

See how eagerly the lobsters and the turtles all advance.

They are waiting on the shingle Will you come and join the dance?" "Will you, won't you, will you, won't you?

Will you come and join the dance?" Aah!

Alice figured me out, Bruce.

I put on your suit to terrify her, but it can't protect me if she knows who I am.

I lost my advantage, and in the process, I gave Gotham their hero back.

I didn't sign up for this part.

I never meant to give the city so much hope.

I can't do this.

I'm not you.

Subtle.

Hmm.

I guess it's broken.

It's supposed to call Batman.

- What do you want?

- What happened it your Batsuit knockoff, Kate?

Too tight, no give, or did you just realize that you accidentally blew a dog whistle that you can't unblow?

I wore it to protect myself from you and your g*ons.

And in the process, you made everyone horny for Batman.

All these poor souls gazing up at the Bat-light, thinking, "My life is about to change. " No.

Still sucks.

Are you suggesting that I put it back on?

No.

Being a hero is not your strong suit.

I would know, seeing as you let dad declare me dead.

Where's my boyfriend?

Hanging in there.

You like damaged men.

He's badly damaged.

You may want to get him back soon.

Okay.

I'll play.

How?

Show me you can stop k*lling people.

Last 24 hours, and I'll reassess.

Rats!

I lost my pocket watch.

And I lost my sister Beth.

Remember her?

Yeah.

I would like her back.

Ohh!

You are going to be very annoying, aren't you?

Very.

Fine.

No k*lling, but only for my darling Dodgson's sake, not for Beth.

Beth has gone down, down, down the rabbit hole, and she's never coming back.

Much like Gotham's beloved Bat.

You've worked hard to get to where you are.

You deserve to feel safe.

Don't you want your kids to be able to play outside again?

Elliot Estates are Gotham's walls within the walls with on-site 24-hour Crows security and a safe room in every unit.

Have you been mugged?

Has your property been vandalized?

At Elliot Estates, you don't ever have to worry about that again.

How do I know?

I'm Tommy Elliot, and I'm here to make Gotham safe again.

Nice.

Okay.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Now I am that annoyingly overprotective husband.

You're married.

Yeah, yeah.

Nice.

Nice.

Are you happy?

Here.

Lean in.

You're a little more aggressive than usual.

What's the problem?

You can't take it?

All right.

You need to move on.

Ha ha ha!

You know, most couples just have breakfast together.

I've got an energy bar in my bag.

Oh.

Can we split it?

Hmm.

Well, front desk says the commander's here.

I got to go.

You can watch it a million times.

Alice still gets away at the end.

No one's taken responsibility for the att*ck.

Trail's gone cold.

Who'd want her dead when she's already in custody?

Besides most of Gotham?

What can I do for you, Agent Moore?

I think I can be helpful, sir.

Considering Alice could att*ck again at any time, I was hoping to get your approval for a special assignment.

Okay, people.

Vesper Fairchild here.

So I'm staring at my wall chart.

Has it really been 10 days without a Batman sighting?

Anyone else feeling ghosted?

Talk to me, Gotham.

Where's Batman?

Just gonna pinch a little bit.

3 2 And you're done.

Wow.

You are so brave.

High-five.

Ha ha!

Late night?

Sophie, hey.

If you're looking for Kate, she's not here.

In fact, she rarely comes home.

You know, I wouldn't be surprised if she was, uh, dating again, seeing as she's single and gorgeous and emotionally available.

Do you normally stay out all night when a psychopath is targeting your family?

What was I supposed to do, not go to Kylie Q's Glam Jam and miss next summer's colors?

You're on danger, Mary.

Okay.

Well, I also have a life, so So your father just made me your bodyguard.

I'm sorry.

What?

That is not your desk.

Shh.

Do you hear that?

That is the sound of me officially having more money than Bruce Wayne.

Tommy Elliot.

How the hell did you even get in here?

Oh.

What's up, Candy Kane?

What?

Bruce never showed you the hide-a-key?

Wait.

I thought you were you were buffing up on some lesbian ninja retreat.

Why are you here, Tommy?

Come here.

Check it out.

Now you see this building?

I just bought it.

5 stories taller than Wayne Tower.

Bruce and Tommy, childhood friends who still act like children.

What is a friend?

A single sole dwelling in two bodies, right?

Is that some secret society thing?

Heh.

It's an Aristotle thing.

Gotham has gotten all intense now that Batman's back.

I mean, have you heard?

Gotham's Dark Knight has the city swooning again.

I saw the picture.

Yeah.

It was, uh Pixelated.

Wow.

I that's your reaction?

The guy had your mom and your sister in his win column.

He blinked And they d*ed.

Oh, Kate.

I thought you'd be more upset.

I've had time to process.

Batman saved your mom's life a few years later.

Guess he's not a total deadbeat, you know?

So, um, where's, uh, Brucey boy?

I wanted to, uh, invite him to celebrate my new pile of bricks.

Bruce hasn't been in Gotham for 3 years.

- You know that.

- Yeah, but he's back now.

- No, he's not.

- Pretty sure he is.

Trust me.

I'd know.

Well, maybe just leave it on his desk.

Will do.

Where are you?

Where are you?

Needless to say, this is not what Wayne's advanced weaponry vault should look like.

The tech in here is top secret.

If something was taken, it's bad.

Had to be Alice's g*ng, right?

Did you pull the security footage?

They jammed the cameras.

It'll take a minute to figure out what they took, but in the meantime, I'll call Bruce, tell him what happened.

You really expect him to answer?

One of his properties containing millions of dollars worth of weaponry was compromised.

If something was gonna get Bruce's attention, it'd be this.

What is this?

Not yours.

Two-way grappling hook, okay?

Twice the hook, twice the chance for disaster.

Possible 1054 at "Gotham City Gazette. " 10-4 on the "Gazette. " Clear the area.

We're en route now.

Code 10.

Okay.

You stay back, figure out what they took.

- I'm gonna check this out.

- Okay.

- Oh, my God.

This is horrible.

- Oh, my God.

Who would do this to Batman?

I tried to be Batman, Bruce, and I drew out your enemies in the process.

Today, it's an effigy.

What happens when your enemies start to k*ll real people in order to draw you out?

The Gotham you set out to protect is now less safe because of me.

So what's the deal, Batman?

Are we really gonna let some loser with a party store gift card and way too much time on his hands win this one?

Step out of the shadows and into the ring.

Gotham needs you.

- Hey.

- Hey.

So you're really doing nothing for my game.

Is there any chance that you could kind of looking for my future husband over here.

Unfortunately, the Commander was pretty specific.

We keep a-list clients within 10-15 feet.

Joy.

Biochemistry?

Not exactly fodder for small talk at Kylie Q's Jam Glam party.

Uh med student.

Kind of thought you went to med school to look for your future husband.

So is my Dad forcing Kate to have a pocket Crow, or is it just me?

He figures since she'd been offered a job with us that it wasn't necessary.

That is so not fair.

So why didn't she take the Crows job?

I have no idea.

I mean, she finally gets offered a position she spent 5 years training for and doesn't take it?

Doesn't make sense.

You know Kate.

She's crazy.

So what is she doing with herself?

I hear she keeps late hours, too.

So are you on this assignment to keep tabs on me or on Kate?

Because I'm getting a very distinctive jealous ex vibe.

I told her to move on.

You want to know why Kate's not a Crow?

It's because you're a Crow.

It's because 5 years of training was easier to walk away from than going to work with the girl who broke her heart.

The Batsuit is made of a m*llitary-grade kevlar woven with enriched carbon nanotubes of my Dad's own design.

- You're screaming.

- What?!

You're screaming!

Oh.

Sorry.

This is a Desert Eagle Mark IX .

50 AE, one of the most powerful handguns in the world.

It can literally blast a hole through anything.

Doesn't make a dent.

Yeah.

You know, it stings a little just, uh, for reference.

This is a rail g*n.

Turns out this is what the thieves took from Wayne R&D.

It has a parallel conductor that generates a pulsed force of electromagnetism, accelerating the velocity of the projectile.

It's the most lethal w*apon that Bruce ever had built.

This is a prototype, but for demonstration purposes.

You're gonna fix that, right?

Yeah.

It's the only g*n that can sh**t a sh*t strong enough to penetrate the suit.

Bruce had it built in case the suit fell into the wrong hands.

Whosoever in possession of the g*n can k*ll Batman.

I put on the suit, and I dragged out one of his enemies.

Or maybe Alice doesn't like you having her boy toy strung to a pipe.

If she has the g*n, she levels the playing field.

Except Alice doesn't know that Bruce Wayne is Batman.

Whoever stole the g*n knew that Bruce had to have the suit to test it on.

Yeah.

If they know that Bruce is Batman Let me show you something.

He's an entitled 1% asshat.

Now he's inviting you to show off his new douche chateau.

- Point?

- The invitation wasn't for me.

It was for Bruce.

Tommy's adamant that he's back in town.

Why would he think that?

Because if Batman's back, Bruce is, too.

Tommy's parents were in that car accident.

Batman pulled his mom from the fire.

- Why would he want to k*ll him?

- No idea.

I'll go ask.

Or you could be Batman.

Sorry.

That just sounded like Mr.

That's Not Meant For You wants me to put the suit back on.

If Tommy did steal the g*n, he is trying to intimidate Batman.

Go show him the Bat's not afraid of anyone.

- He has that.

- Yeah, and you have that and an entire city behind you.

That includes me.

Knowing Bruce, if he built a rail g*n, he built something that can stop it, and I will figure out how to use it.

You're stronger than this guy, Kate.

Go kick his ass.

And if I can't, I let down an entire city.

I'm not Batman, Luke.

Ahh.

All Crows, be on heightened alert.

Hey.

What are you doing?

Alice, wait, wait!

Oh.

Kate's gonna be so disappointed.

I've been havin' dreams Elliot party.

Jumpin' on a trampoline Flippin' in the air I never land, just float there Oh.

Hey.

What is happening here?

Your dad assigned me as Mary's security detail.

- That sucks.

- No kidding, but what was I supposed to do, miss the party of the weekend because I have a full-time babysitter?

Can't have the Queen of Gotham's party scene go radio silent on socials.

What about you, Kate?

What brings you to an adult frat house?

I was told to move on.

I never feel so loved We get it, Tommy.

Could you live any higher?

What can I get you?

Just looking for the man of the hour.

He's around, but if you want to save yourself from a verbal carwash of veiled misogyny, you might want to plant yourself here.

He'll be by soon.

In that case, I will have a beer.

I'm Reagan, by the way.

Kate Kane.

Thought that was you.

Tyler.

We, uh we met a few weeks ago.

Sophie's husband.

I remember.

You know, I hate these things.

Guy has 10 contracts with the Crows, so we all come here to kiss his ass.

Well, at least you get to work with your wife.

Yeah.

You know, speaking of, I I didn't catch how you and Sophie know each other.

What do you mean?

Well, she she never told me she was friends with the boss' daughter.

She didn't tell you who I am.

No.

I'm Kate from Point Rock.

Oh.

Oh, you went to the Academy together.

Right.

That explains it.

That explains it.

Ahem.

Well, boss is here.

You have a nice night, Kate from Point Rock.

He married your ex and has no idea.

Wow!

You're good.

Professional level.

Started bar-tending before I could drink.

You learn to read people.

All right.

- Read him for me.

- Tommy Elliot?

- Mm-hmm.

- Danger.

Hazardous waste.

King of real estate.

Thinks he's doing us all a favor when he really just helps fund the walls that are separating our city.

Gotham.

Am I right?

Yeah.

Thank goodness.

Someone who loathes Tommy Elliot as much as me.

Isn't he one of your biggest clients?

Unfortunately.

Well, I'm glad you're here, Kate.

It means you're not out gallivanting with Alice.

You would tell me if she'd reached out to you again, right?

I don't think Alice is gonna be a problem today.

What's that supposed to mean?

Twin instincts.

Mom.

Security detail?

Seriously?

Unfortunately, this is the world we're living in now.

Well, I need my world to have a little bit more elbow room.

I can't even reapply lip gloss without getting poked by an AK.

Nice view of Wayne Tower.

Well, took half my life, but I'm finally looking down on Bruce Wayne.

What makes you think he's back?

We're cosmic besties.

And here I thought I was his favorite cousin.

Not even a phone call.

Well, he's a busy man.

You're right.

He's probably preoccupied with that break-in at Wayne R&D.

They stole a specialized, uh, firearm.

That sucks.

Good news is the morons who took it probably don't realize there's a hidden GPS tracker inside the device, and pbbb it's only a matter of time before Wayne Security come knocking on their door.

Hmm.

Kane.

Who is this?

Heh heh.

You taught me, remember, or did you give up on music like you gave up on me?

What are you trying to do, Alice?

You're not getting in my head.

Heh.

You'd be surprised where I can get into, Commander.

Where are you?

Well, I could tell you, but that would ruin the surprise.

Let's talk until you're finished tracing my call.

I never understood why you stopped looking for me.

I always thought a father would do anything to find his daughter Swim oceans, move mountains, but now I get it.

You're on top of the mountain.

Heh.

If I had this view, I'd stop looking for me, too.

More time to enjoy your new life.

How'd you get in my house?

Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk.

Oh.

You should be ashamed, Commander.

King of the Crows, can't even protect your own nest.

I'm coming for you.

Maybe if you'd uttered those words 15 years ago, we wouldn't be here now.

I won't let you forget me, Commander, not again.

- We need to leave now.

- What is it?

I'll explain downstairs.

Kane to Moore.

Get Kate and Mary in an armored truck until I deal with something.

Copy that.

Mary.

What's happening?

Oh I'm okay.

- Hey.

Where's Kate?

- Probably left.

I'll text her.

That's some g*n you got there.

Ahem.

Party's not in here, Candy Kane.

It's over, Tommy.

This isn't yours.

You don't want to get in my way.

- How do you know who he is?

- You mean Batman?

Oops.

Did I say that out loud?

How do you know that?

Oh, because a few months ago I paid a man to riddle me the answer.

Got love the honorable Bruce Wayne for designing a failsafe so he could never become too powerful in his supersuit.

He is such a great guy.

He's your best friend.

Yeah, he was.

The bestest.


Nothing could be average with Bruce.

Even had to have more dead parents than me.

Because he saved your mom's life.

Oh, yeah.

No.

I am aware.

Thanks to him, instead of collecting my inheritance, I was left wiping the spittle of a jabbering madwoman's lips for 13 years.

If you wanted him dead, why wait until he's in a bulletproof suit?

Because Bruce didn't ruin life.

Batman did.

Do you know what it's like to have the villain of your story be the hero of your city?

He is a monster, who left me anchored to repulsive, gold-digging bitch, and now he's gonna die.

Well, that answers that.

Bruce's is bigger.

Aah!

- Aah!

- Hold it!

What did you do?

You have Batman meet me on the roof, or the elevators I just h*jacked, they start to drop.

Batman isn't here.

Yeah, because he's hiding.

It's time for Gotham's hero to man up.

Next one's in an hour.

It'll look like this but with people the city will actually miss.

Oh, my God!

It's my leg.

I'm so sorry.

You're gonna be okay.

Help him.

Okay?

And then check all the elevators.

I swear I heard something crash.

Yeah.

Me, too.

Does anyone have reception?

Moore to base.

Check, check.

Hello?

How is our signal dead?

Hello?

FYI, I'm a social media influencer, so if you people don't want a scathing review of your building's safety, you should hop to it!

No service.

I hope Mary's okay.

Why did you pull us out of there?

- Alice.

- Alice?

Is she the reason we're stuck right now?

Very well could be.

She just called me from our penthouse.

What?

I swear if this is Alice I'm gonna be so pissed.

They'll find us, babe.

Oh, my God.

What?

Nothing.

I just totally forgot you two were married.

3 years but still full of surprises.

Saw Kate inside.

You two went to point rock together?

Yeah, we did.

Why?

Was it a secret or something?

No.

Why would it be a secret?

I don't know.

Why would you never mention her?

She's our boss' daughter.

Didn't I mention her?

No, soph, you didn't.

I don't know.

We weren't that close.

Never occurred to me.

Anyone want to try prying open the doors?

How the hell did she get inside?

I have no idea.

How can this city trust us to protect it when we can't even keep ourselves safe?

- We'll contain it.

- We should have contained Alice when we had the chance.

Trust me.

That was the plan.

Kate threatened to cut me out of her life.

What was I supposed to do?

All right.

I'll go and help pull you out, okay?

Okay.

Okay.

Come on.

All right.

We should split up and see if anyone else is stuck.

Okay.

- I know what you're gonna s - I didn't say anything.

Why are you here?

He's gonna drop another one.

I know that.

All those people are hurt because I put the suit on.

- It's not your fault, Kate.

- It is, Luke.

It is my fault.

I brought this to Gotham.

Tommy today, someone else tomorrow.

This is on me.

You said if anything was gonna get Bruce's attention, it would be this.

I need you to be real with me.

Do you think he's coming back?

- Luke.

- No.

Tommy wants Batman.

The city needs Batman, and I am not Batman.

But maybe I'm better because I'm here.

How longs that gonna take to fix?

- There aren't enough.

- What?

EMTs.

Ma'am, how are you feeling?

Ma'am?

Any head pain, headache?

This woman needs help now.

We already checked her.

Well, check her again.

Mary, they're professionals.

You're a second-year med student.

She's got a headache and blown pupil.

Could be a subdural or an epidural hemorrhage.

I read ahead.

You're right.

Thanks.

Your friend Tommy wants to k*ll you, Bruce, and since you're not here, it looks like I'm gonna have to kick his ass on your behalf And send a message to anyone else who'd come after you, but to do that, I need to be honest with the city that I'm not you.

I'm me.

You're not Batman.

That's the point.

Who the hell are you?

I want Batman, not his side piece.

I found Tommy.

Activate the disruptor in the gauntlet.

When the light flashes green, his g*n will neutralize.

Yeah.

That's not happening.

- Did you charge the glove?

- Wait.

What?

Where's Batman?

Okay.

Activated the charge.

You need to stall for 30 seconds.

Unh!

Stalling.

I'm done with you.

Ugh!

No!

What the hell is that?

Don't move.

It's not stable.

What the hell was that?

See you at the bottom.

Let go.

Unh!

A red wig?

And I'm the crazy one.

You saved my life.

Guess we're even.

This place is crawling with Crows.

You shouldn't be here.

Well, I came to crash the party.

Turns out our host b*at me to it.

I didn't know that it was a costume party.

Let me guess Red.

The color of our birthstone.

To remind us where we came from.

About that.

They say if you want to quit you have to really want to, and, well, I didn't want to.

You see, 24 hours is a really long time.

Guess you're gonna have to let my sweet Dodgson die.

Like I said Beth is gone.

Then why save me?

Because I have plans for you, Kate.

That, and it's no fun torturing a corpse.

Believe me, I've tried.

Anyhoo, good luck on the upkeep.

You think Tommy's annoying.

Wait till your roots grow in.

If you k*ll again, it's over, and I will stop thinking of you as my sister.

You're finally catching on.

That is exactly what I want.

You say that, but it's not true, and I know you know that, too.

Right money in the right hands.

I will be out in an hour.

They're taking you to Arkham, Tommy.

Good luck buying your way out of that.

You tell Bruce that I won't stop until he shows his face.

Reagan.

- Hey.

- Hey.

There you are.

- Are you okay?

- Yeah.

I guess Tommy's a bigger d*ck than I thought.

So that whole I can read people thing, yeah, so you're into me.

I mean, you would know.

You're the professional.

Cool.

I'll call you then.

I'd like that.

Catherine?

Catherine?

There you are.

You okay?

Alice broke into our home and m*rder*d that guard.

You have to stop her, Jacob.

I know.

We're gonna find her.

And put an end to this.

When Alice called, she was playing a song on Beth's cello Bach.

I used to tell Beth it was our song.

She could have found one of Beth's recitals online.

You're smarter than that, Jacob.

Jacob, don't let her in.

I wasn't afraid of letting down the city.

I was afraid of letting down you, Bruce, but whatever happens, whatever I face, it's worth it.

Okay, Gotham.

Someone just dropped a bombshell on this city, and I mean that literally.

The Bat is back Just curvier and sexier, so the big question, what are we calling her Batlady, Batchick?

Talk to me, Gotham.

We need a name.

Batwoman.
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