01x08 - A Mad Tea-Party

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Batwoman". Aired October 6, 2019 - current.*
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Three years after Batman disappeared, his cousin Kate Kane sets out to protecting the streets of Gotham City.
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01x08 - A Mad Tea-Party

Post by bunniefuu »

Previously on "Batwoman"

LUKE: Bruce never stopped looking for your sister's body.

Catherine Hamilton's investigators found skull fragments of a little girl.

It's Beth.

You never would have moved on if you didn't think that Beth were dead.

I paid the DNA analyst to write the report.

As hard as I have tried to get over you, I can't.

It's definitely not fair to Tyler.

Maybe it's best if I keep my distance from now on.

Daddy!

Catherine seems to think so.

We are to host the most memorable mad tea-party Gotham has ever seen.

Ha ha ha!

KATE, VOICE-OVER: They say the choices we make define us, but despite all the darkness, despite all those who doubt, and despite my own fear that I've lost my sister forever, I choose to hope that Beth is still there.

Don't tell anyone, Bruce, but I think this makes me an optimist.

[CAPE FLUTTERING]

- KATE: Give me your jacket!

- MAN: Wait.

What?

Unh!

Give me your jacket.

This is vintage, bitch.

Hyah!

Okay.

Take it, take it, take it, take it.

[SIRENS]

[TIRES SQUEAL]

Batwoman 1x08 A Mad Tea-Party - Vintage.

- Thanks.

Not exactly my style or size.

Ooh.

Is that blood?

You really shouldn't have.

Front right pocket.

Rabbit dropped it in there before he made a run for it.

Think we can use the phone's GPS to track Alice?

- I can try.

- Cool.

I see you broke the staff in two.

Like I wouldn't notice?

Sorry.

For the record, it'd be a whole lot cooler if it actually came apart.

It doesn't, though, so Okay.

Here is every location the phone's gone to the past 7 days.

Where's this?

Ah.

Slice of Gotham.

Worst breadsticks in the city, but location two is a little more promising.

It's a warehouse in The Bowery.

Then that's where she is.

Don't wait up.

ALICE: Ohh!

Too sad, too loud, too mundane!

Whaa!

Why do I have nothing to wear?

Ugh.

If you're going to kidnap me again, do wait until I can dolly up into something with, um, a little more flair.

Did you hire The r*fle to k*ll me?

Says the walking, talking, living girl.

He sh*t someone that he believed to be Batwoman with the coil accelerator, a w*apon designed for only one reason To k*ll me.

The guy who designed it was found with a butterfly Kn*fe in his heart.

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Let me rephrase that.

So an evil man was trying to k*ll my twin sister, and I ensured that that didn't happen.

What is this?

Uh, that is a multimillion-dollar piece of technology that allows the coil accelerator to penetrate your suit.

That's the only one that exists on the planet.

Anyone who knew how to make it is, well, um, exactly that, past tense, so you're welcome.

Turn yourself in, Alice.

Let me help you.

I know my sister is in there.

Oh, this again.

You kept this From the day of our bat mitzvahs.

Take it and be gone.

I am quite busy, and I have nothing to wear.

[SIGHS]

It's Kane.

I'll be back in Gotham later tonight.

We'll go over the floor plan for the gala first thing tomorrow.

Talk then.

[ALL GRUNTING]

[ELECTRICITY CRACKLING]

[JACOB GROANING]

So the way I see it you can either spend your Friday night in here inhaling asbestos, or you could join me in wearing this season's sexiest haute couture, hmm?

Seriously, Gigi and Bella could not even get their hands on this yet.

You want me to go to that thing tonight.

That thing is the Gotham Humanitarian Gala, i. e. the most important event of the season.

Honoring your mom, who told my dad that Beth was dead.

Asbestos it is.

I get that we are bordering on too soon.

Hmm.

Pretty sure we're right in the middle of it.

I know that this isn't important to you, but it's important to me, okay, so why can't it be important to you that it's important to me?

Because you think that if Gotham sees us as a family that we'll start to believe it, and that's just not how it works, not after what Catherine did.

But you gave Alice a second chance and a third and a fourth.

How can you just write off my mom as Satan but you don't seem to have any problem holding out hope for the actual most evil person in Gotham?

Because she's my family.

And I'm not?

Got it.

I guess I am the crazy one, you know, for thinking that you and I could still be sisters.

Of course you're my family.

It's just Different?

Yeah.

Do yourself a favor.

Stop digging.

Listen.

Even if I wanted to go, I could never do that to my dad.

You don't know?

He decided to come tonight For me.

Sorry for thinking that you would do the same.

You're going to the Humanitarian Gala?

Yeah.

I meant to talk to you about that.

Unless Catherine somehow didn't fake Beth's death, then I don't know what there is to talk about.

Hmm.

- Are you getting back with her?

- Hmm.

When you've been with someone for a decade and a half, you don't just walk away.

You're letting her weasel her way back into your life.

There's no weaseling, Kate.

We've been spending some time together.

When?

You've been out of town.

Oh.

You know, we had breakfast when I got back.

You're seriously forgiving her?

I'm not defending what Catherine did.

She's not either, but I'm beginning to understand why she did it as a mother, as a wife.

She thought she was helping us move on.

[SCOFFS]

ALICE: Wake up, father dear.

Hmm.

Why, what a long sleep you've had.

I thought it was high time you and I finally had a Daddy-daughter chat.

- That's all I want.

- Hmm.

Oh, come on.

Not like this.

- Let me out of these chains.

- Shh.

You're not the commander here Commander.

Kate will know I'm gone.

Will she?

Hmm.

Because I saw her last night, and there was nary a mention of you.

Guess she's 0 for 2 in missing family members.

What do you want me to say?

I'm sorry?

There is no word to describe what it feels like to know that I left you behind.

Then find the words to explain why you never tested the skull fragments Catherine found.

I had no reason to think that she was lying.

But your daughter was missing, and this was just a handful of bones found by some woman you'd known for less than a year.

Maybe believing that you were dead was easier than waking up every morning with hope or going to sleep every night with a broken heart.

Of course, I should have looked longer.

I should have hoped harder, I should have I should have had the DNA tested myself.

I wish I wish I could have been your father for the past 15 years, but I failed.

I failed you.

Thank you for saying that.

And thank you for making me who I am today.

What are you planning?

Tell me what to do to stop it.

Today is the day of my mad tea-party to which you've been invited.

Hmm.

I'm fairly certain you'll attend.

Catherine will be delighted, but how can that be if you're stuck here and still the guest of honor?

I guess you'll see as we drink tea and someone ends up a goner.

Catherine manipulated my dad 15 years ago, and here she is just doing it again.

My dad is the head of The Crows.

I mean, how is he even falling for this?

Alice has been on a k*lling spree since you got back, and this is what's got you drinking Bruce's good stuff?

Alice was brainwashed against her own will.

This is different.

My dad is choosing.

He is choosing to forgive a woman who lied about the death of his daughter.

Catherine paid a team of scientists to change DNA results.

My dad once found a joint in my backpack and grounded me for a whole summer.

It doesn't make sense.

This is not him.

- This isn't him.

- What am I missing?

[CELL PHONE RINGING]

If you're calling with a lecture, I don't have time.

KATE: The opposite actually.

I know complicated better than anyone else, and if you want to work things out with she who must not be named, it's not my business.

Well, I appreciate that, kiddo.

And in thinking about it, I realized that I never really gave her a chance.

Heh.

Remember the wedding and the big snowstorm and I just kept wishing that maybe if we got snowed in you wouldn't have to get married?

If only a snowstorm were our biggest hurdle.

Anyway, I just wanted to say I'm sorry and have fun tonight.

Thanks, Kate.

My dad married Catherine on the hottest day of the year.

- So if that's not your dad, then - It's Mouse.

So you know those vacation days we banked?

What if we took one of our old-school road trips?

I was thinking down south, maybe Dollywood.

Sounds cool.

What is up with you?

I just suggested a road trip to Dollywood.

Nothing's up with me.

Nothing, or you're pretending to be cool about Kate and me and you're obviously still freaked?

Ty, if this is going to be a thing, we should talk about it.

[CELL PHONE VIBRATING]

Sorry to keep you waiting.

I wanted to go over tonight's agenda.

As you know, this is one of the city's biggest nights, so I need you two to run point.

Sophie, you take the Alpha team and cover the interior.

Tyler, you're with Bravo locking up the perimeter.

JACOB: Teams are already down in the theater - beginning their sweep.

- I want this evening to go off without a hitch.

[DARTS FIRE]

VESPER: Good evening, Gotham.

Tonight is the city's Humanitarian Gala, which is rich person for "let's dress up and congratulate each other on being rich and dressed up", and it's all to honor Hamilton Dynamics' matriarch of munitions Catherine Hamilton-Kane.

Not sure how they're gonna fit a Tomahawk m*ssile into a swag bag.

MARY: So I'm en route to the Humanitarian Gala with the rents.

What uuup?!

Where Mom is being honored as the Gotham giver of the year #prouddaughter.

I just wanted to take a moment and say how thankful I am for family and for sticking by each other through thick and thin.

That's what it's all about.

To Catherine, a most extraordinary woman.

Cheers.

WILLY ECHO: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Yeah Ugh.

Must be time to move.

Ha ha!

You are becoming incessant.

And you are becoming predictable.

Whatever you have planned for the gala, The Crows are already on to it.

Tell me where Dad is.

Or what?

You'll have me arrested, institutionalized, k*lled?

You hate him.

I get it.

I would, too, but he did not mean to hurt you.

You keep holding on so tightly to the childish notion that Beth is still in here.

If Beth is gone, then why did you keep this?

You saved this for the same reason you saved me from The r*fle.

Because despite the hate, the resentment, the rage, there's still good, there's still Beth.

So tell me where Dad is.

I left him in the same place he left me.

Thank you.

Kate.

He's not doing so well.

You might want to be quick about it.

Dad?

Hi.

Good evening.

JACOB: I assume you have everything in order.

10-4, Commander.

All good here.

LUKE: Got to hand it to you, Mouse.

That's impressive.

If you're not Jacob, then you're Not a Crow.

Oh, crap.

[APPLAUSE]

To date, the Hamilton Foundation has donated countless millions to fund work in the health, emergency relief, poverty, and education sectors both globally and in Gotham.

All of these philanthropic efforts are spearheaded by Catherine herself.

I can think of on one more deserving of the Gotham humanitarian of the year award than Catherine Hamilton-Kane.

Whoo!

Ha ha!

[APPLAUSE]

Whoo!

Thank you, Dr.

Campbell, for that wonderful intro and to Mayor Akins and the city of Gotham for this great honor.

When I took over this company from my father Tyler.

Tyler!

Wake up!

What happened?

The commander tranqed us.

What?

Help!

We're in here!

One-way windows, soundproof walls.

No one can hear us or see us.

Kate was right.

Alice's new minion is impersonating Jacob Kane.

I'm still way too drugged up to process that.

Alice must be planning something at the gala, which is why she took us out.

I thought Alice was more of a Slit open our necks and pose for a tea-party type m*rder*r.

Ketamine's a little dull, no?

She didn't want to hurt us.

We're talking about the same Alice, right?

She's trying to preserve some sick relationship with Kate, and k*lling me would k*lling you would mean Kate would never forgive her because Kate's still in love with you.

I have no idea.

And what about you?

Any idea how you feel?

We should probably figure out how to get out of here.

Today, Hamilton is a household name in technology innovation.

[MURMURING]

She's fine.

"Tonight You honor me as one of Gotham's heroes, an honor that I bought and paid for" [INDISTINCT CHATTER]

"Quite literally with blood money.

My company makes millions by putting weapons of w*r in the hands of Gotham's criminals" "And my husband rakes in even more by protecting you from them".

Dad.

"Quite the scam we've been running, wouldn't you say?" [CHATTERING GROWING LOUDER]

"What my husband doesn't want you to know is that the true villains of Gotham don't go by the name Joker, Riddler, or Alice".

"Gotham's true enemies are right in front of you".

I I I [PEOPLE GASP]

MARY: Mom!

Mom, Mom, Mom!

Orpheum Theater.

We need medics.

You hang in there, sweetheart.

You're okay.

MARY: Hello?

Something's happened to my mom.

She's breathing, but we need medical help immediately.

You keep an eye over them until I get back.

Oh, my God.

Where are you going?

I'm gonna meet the medical help and bring them here.

- Okay.

All right.

Okay.

- Hang in there, sweetheart.

Oh, my God.

[CATHERINE GAGGING]

I didn't have a choice.

It's okay.

She made me.

Stay with me.

Help is on the way.

CAMPBELL: Ladies and gentlemen, as we get medics for Mrs.

Hamilton-Kane, please stay in your seats.

There's no cause for alarm.

Please.

[PEOPLE SHOUTING]

Everything's under control.

Stay in your seats.

There's no need to panic.

WOMAN: The Crows are holding us!

MAN: Let us out!

Okay.

I'm in position.

Batwoman's here.

Let's bounce!

Rrrraaahh!

[g*nsh*t]

Aah!

A little left.

Trying.

Nope.

Other one.

- Got it.

- Nice.

Yeah.

I'm really regretting not getting you a bigger one of these in this moment.

I wouldn't have wanted it.

You sure you still want this one?

Tyler.

It's a little hard to ignore the irony of using the engagement ring I got you to escape your ex-girlfriend's lunatic sister, who didn't k*ll us because she knows more about your past relationships than I do.

What do you want to know?

What was it between you two?

And don't say it was just some drunk college hookup unless you were actually drunk for 3 years.

Look.

All my life I followed the rules, my family's rules, the army's rules.

This was the first time I broke one, and it almost cost me everything.

That's why I lied.

Didn't answer my question.

Let's go get some help.

JACOB: Commissioner, with all due respect, I need your men to stand down.

She's infiltrated The Crows.

If you breach, we're all dead.

Why isn't Jacob back?

He'll be back soon.

Your husband won't be joining you.

Get me the tray.

Catherine, you do not look so well.

You stay the hell away from us!

I'm not the one you should worry about, for "It was all very well to say, 'Drink me'," but you should have first looked to see whether it's marked poison or not.

Oh!

You poisoned her?

Group effort.

I used a Catherine Hamilton recipe, project 4782.

Ring any bells?

4782?

Catherine, do you want to tell her?

I think her internal organs are liquefying.

I'll just tell you.

It's a deadly neurotoxin designed to k*ll without mercy.

First, there is the dizzy spells and then nosebleeds and then comes muscle paralysis and, uh, oh, respiratory failure, but lucky for us, Hamilton developed an antidote.

Okay.

You just got to hold on until we can get that antidote.

Oh, no, my dear, I'm confusing my stories.

Hamilton never even bothered to develop an antidote.

If she dies, I'll k*ll you!

She made a choice.

Maybe if she'd made better choices in the past, we wouldn't be here right now.

You're just gonna let her die.

Aw, Mary, my darling, impetuous stepsister, I'm not a total monster.

No.

I found a solution, a universal cure-all all the way from Coriana.

Where's Coriana?

Hmm.


On a map or two.

It's made from a desert rose that blooms only on the island.

One prick of its thorn can k*ll you on the spot, but harness the flower and nurture its serum, and it gives you life.

What do you want?

Hmm.

A simple apology for all the pain you've caused me.

[GASPING]

I'm sorry Alice.

I just don't believe you.

[GRUNTING]

Get me eyes on Alice and Jacob.

[RETCHING]

She said she was sorry!

You think I enjoy watching a daughter lose her mother?

Gah!

I was just inches from my own mother's severed head floating down the Gotham river after our car plummeted off the bridge.

Oh, please.

Please just try.

I can't lose you.

Please just try.

I'm a mother.

Alice When I saw Kate grieving, I saw my own daughter.

I just wanted to take away her pain, but in trying to take away Kate's pain, I gave you a lifetime of it.

It's all my fault, Alice.

All the lost years, all the agony you endured, it's all my fault.

It's all I'm truly sorry.

Thank you, Catherine.

I do believe you've earned a draught of this tea.

CATHERINE: Oh!

Oh, dear.

Not you, too.

What?!

Uhh.

No.

What did you do?

How did you Tell me you didn't both drink the champagne.

Oh, that's such a shame, seeing as there's only enough antidote for one.

Dad drank the champagne, too.

We need to go find him.

He'll be fine.

He knows better than - to poison himself.

- What?

He poisoned you, Mary.

Jacob would never hurt us.

Hmm.

Getting closer.

You had someone impersonate him.

What?

The Skin Pirate.

There is an escapee from Arkham.

That wasn't Jacob in the limo.

There you go.

Now what were we talking about?

Yes.

The choices we make.

Do choose wisely.

Okay.

Maybe if we split it, maybe we'll buy enough time to get to the emergency room.

No, no.

Alice would have accounted for that.

No.

Mom, we have to try, okay?

We have to try.

Mary, listen to me.

Drink it.

No.

There has to be another way.

Mary, I am your mother.

Ugh!

Drink it.

It's okay.

Drink it.

[SOBS]

Did you do it?

MAN: Jacob's drugged, and I put him in the SUV.

- Good.

- He doesn't know what happened.

I have to go.

You're too late.

Where is my dad?

Our dad.

You'll find out soon enough.

Whatever you did, you can undo it.

But I don't want to undo it.

I was locked in a cell for 11 years.

What do you think put me to sleep at night, rainbows, unicorns?

I dreamt of revenge.

What did you do?

What did you do?!

"It was all very well to say, 'Drink me', but the wise little Alice was not going to do that in a hurry".

Oh, come on.

It's not like Catherine didn't have it coming.

You poisoned Catherine?

Catherine poisoned Catherine when she slithered into our family and brainwashed our father and replaced us with that vapid human run-on sentence of a daughter.

Catherine brought this on herself, and I was more than happy to watch Daddy go down with her.

Ha ha ha!

Unh!

[CHOKING]

[GASPING]

Ha ha ha!

[MOANS]

That's what I thought.

We need to go.

One way or another, dear sister, you'll come to see my way.

Hang on, Mom.

They'll be here, they'll pump your stomach, they'll find an antidote.

You just got to hang on, okay?

I always wanted to see you work in your clinic.

How did you know about the clinic?

I've always known.

How come you never said anything?

The fastest way for you to stop doing something was for me to approve of it.

Oh, my God.

Do you know how many wardrobe changes I did in that elevator thinking that I was fooling you?

Cameras in that elevator.

Ha ha ha!

Mom?

Mom.

Shh.

Yeah.

[GROANS]

- Mary - Yeah?

You're the one thing I did right.

Nothing makes me prouder than having raised you.

I love I love Mom?

No, no, no, no, no, no.

Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom, stay with me.

Wake up.

Mom!

Please!

Mom!

[GROANS]

What is this?

Ohh.

- Kate.

- Who is this?

What?

It's it's me, Kate.

What did you get me for my sixth birthday?

- What?

- What was it?

Ohh.

It was, um It was a bike that was too big for you.

You wrecked it the same day.

What is going on?

Alice and Mouse were at the gala.

[SIREN]

Get out of the car, Commander.

- Dad?

- I'll call you right back.

What's going on, Commissioner?

Hands in the air, Kane.

Commissioner.

Jacob Kane, you're under arrest.

I don't understand.

What are you talking about?

I've never seen that before in my life.

What the hell is happening?

Get your hands off of me!

DANA DEWITT: Gotham is in shock tonight over the death of Hamilton Dynamics CEO Catherine Hamilton-Kane, allegedly at the hands of her husband and head of Crows security Jacob Kane.

Her death occurred just after some stunning and very public admissions by Hamilton-Kane while accepting an award at Gotham's Humanitarian Gala.

KATE: Mary?

Mary.

Do you know how many horrible people that I've saved?

Druggies thugs with face tattoos.

Pulled a windshield out of a guy who stole the car that he totaled.

Walked out of my clinic the next day like nothing had happened, but I I couldn't save her.

I am so sorry, Mary.

You know how she d*ed?

Exactly the way that Alice planned it.

Slowly And in pain And the only way for her to save herself was for me to die, and she sure as hell wasn't about to let that happen because she is not the horrible person that you and Alice claim that she is.

You You are literally the last person who can bring me comfort right now.

I'm gonna ask you again, Kate.

Is Alice worth it?

No.

Finally.

Too bad it's too late.

Agent Sophie Moore.

Yeah.

It's been a late night for us, too.

Just put me on with the Commissioner.

He's got the wrong guy.

Because I've got a dart hole in my neck to prove it.

Please have him call me.

This is insane.

How can they think he actually did this?

People believe what they're told.

It's human nature.

Then people are idiots.

- I should call Mary.

- I want kids.

What?!

And a dog and family traditions that we bitch about but do anyways.

Okay.

I don't want to move past this today and then have it come up again in two years and realize that I'm wasting my life fighting for something I can't actually have.

I don't want that either.

Do you love me?

Yes.

Are you in love with me?

Because if you love me, you'll be real with me right now.

I don't know.

Let's not make this any harder than it is.

I think you need to figure yourself out, and when you do and if you see the same future I do, maybe I'll still be here.

Maybe I won't.

REUBEN AND THE DARK: I am broken, I am brave The way the body behaves KATE, VOICE-OVER: We all make choices, Bruce.

I chose hope.

I am free, I'm afraid The mirror of my mistakes KATE, VOICE-OVER: And I chose to believe Beth was still alive.

I chose to save my sister from the monster she's become, but by making that choice I lost my entire family for the second time, and now the only thing I'm left with is the awful truth that Alice was right.

Beth is gone.

May the water rise around her Oh, oh, oh, oh My lawyer could only get us 5 minutes.

I hate her so much, Dad.

When I get out of here, I'm gonna put her down once and for all.

This time, I won't stop you.

For so many years, - I've traveled across worlds, - across the multiverse to do one thing k*ll you, and now here, you save my life.

VOICE: Submit and begin your life anew.

Show me.

The knowledge is within you.

[BEEP]

[BEEP]

[BEEPING]

[WHOOSHING]

[GASPS]

[SCREAMING]
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