01x09 - Chuck Versus the Imported Hard Salami

[bunniefuu]

Chuck: My name is Chuck and here’s what’s been going on In my life lately:

Sarah: I'm a little worried about our cover.

I think it's time for us to make love.

Lou: I own a deli in the mall, and I often think about meats and cheeses.

Sarah: You do know we're just spending the night together for cover, right?

Chuck: By now, I'd say I'm pretty familiar with the concept of faking it, so...

Sarah: You're interested in that Lou girl, aren't you?

Chuck: Sarah is my...

Sarah: Girlfriend.
Chuck: mm-hmm.

Chuck: You and me, our thing under the undercover thing, is this ever going anywhere?

Sarah: No.

Chuck: We need to break up.

You know, like, fake break up our pretend relationship.

Thug; Hey! careful, you idiot! this thing is live!

Customer: Excuse me. Can I please get some help?

Morgan: Three, two, one, bingo.

I'm sorry. I'm on a break.

Great news, pal.

I am free this evening for a meal.

Thinking about a little surf and turf, right? Half meatball, half tuna sub.

Then boom!Call of duty 4, modern warfare.

Me and you.

sn*per on my back watching me. Oscar delta.

Chuck: I would love to, but i-i have plans tonight.

Morgan : Don't sweat it. Me, too, slammed.

What are you and the lady doing?

Chuck: Uh, actually, the lady and I are no mas. It's over.

Morgan: Ah, I knew this would happen.

Dude, I'm sorry. Damn it!

Women can be so cruel.

Chuck: You know, as a matter of fact, I'm the one who did the breaking up.

She just wasn't the right girl for me.

Morgan: Right girl?

Are you out of your mind, dude?

She is the hottest piece we are ever gonna get!

Chuck: Listen, I didn't really see a future for Sarah and I, ultimately, and so I didn't want to waste any more time.

Morgan: Beg for her back, charles.

Go yeah. Yeah.

Lester; What's going on there?

Morgan: Uh, just a little thing I call "operation devastation."

Lester; Explain.

Morgan: Okay.

My boy about to dump the wiener chick.

Jeff; What?

Lester: No way.

Jeff: Don't lie. You liar.

Morgan; I'm not lying.

All right? Relax.

She wasn't the right girl.

What?

Morgan: Yeah.

Lester: Right girl?

What does that mean?

Sarah: Look, Chuck, I've been thinking about our break up, and I'm not so sure it's the best idea.

Chuck: Miss me already, huh?

Sarah; Well, just, you know, for the cover, it makes things easier.

Chuck: Well, then I guess your job's gonna be a little bit harder.

Sarah: Look, I'm sorry if you thought there was something between us.

It's very common in these situations to perceive a connection that isn't there.

Chuck: Of course. I get it.

It's the old story, you know?

Guy gets supercomputer in his brain, beautiful CIA agent is sent to protect him, and then she tells him, while under the spell of truth serum, that she's not interested.

I get it.

But for me, the emotional roller coaster is a little much, so I think I'd rather find something a little less common, l ike, say, I don't know, a, uh, a real relationship.

Sarah; Okay, Chuck, well, if that's what you want, then I'm gonna have to sell it.

Chuck: You okay?

Sarah?

Jeff; Heartbreaker.

Lester; dream maker.

Jeff: Love taker.

Lester: Don't you mess around with Chuck.

Jeff: Check this out.

Lester: Hey, buddy.

Heard about what happened.

Are you... Are you okay?

Chuck: Yeah, I'm-i'm fine, lester.

Thanks for asking.

Lester; Yeah, no problem.

Now that you're done with Sarah, you mind if I take a cr*ck at her?

Chuck: Hey, swing away, champ.

Lester: You bet, brother.

Morgan; Where you going? Don't run from me, all right?

We need to talk about our emotions and all that crap.

Chuck; I'm sorry, buddy.

You're gonna have to weep without me, I got a date.

Morgan: What? Get out of here.

Already? Good for you, hotshot. With who?

Chuck: Just someone I met.

Makes sandwiches. Deli owner.

Morgan: Okay, hold on a second. A pro?

Lou: Who ordered the capracola?

Beckman; I don't like the idea of this break up at all.

What the hell happened?

Casey: She got dumped.

Sarah: We decided that it would be best for Chuck to date a civilian.

It will help secure his cover in the event that someone ids me.

Casey: Yeah, because she got dumped.

Beckman; Let me get this straight.

Some woman comes in off the street and starts dating the asset, and this doesn't strike either of you as suspicious.

Sarah: It's not completely unfeasible.

He is a reasonably charming guy.

Beckman: I've heard enough.

I want to know everything there is to know about this woman before she gets too close.

Chuck; Wait, wait.

Wow, it's, uh, it's been a while since I've done that.

Lou: Me, too.

I think I tweaked my neck.

Chuck: Well, it, uh, it wouldn't be an official Chuck Bartowski date if the woman didn't leave injured in some way.

Lou: And I don't...

Usually do this on first dates, but you want to come inside?

Chuck: Yeah.

Lou: I'm about to make you a very happy man.

Chuck; Oh, my god, you're so good.

That is so amazing.

Wow!

Lou: Do you really like it?

Chuck: Oh!

Oh!

Like it?

Yeah!

Yeah, I like it.

I-i love it.

Lou: What's wrong? You don't like it?

It's the chopped liver, isn't it?

Chuck: Huh? What?

No, no, i...

No, it's amazing. It's amazing.

You're...

You're... Amazing.

What is, um, what is, what is that?

Lou: What?

Chuck: The invite thing?

Lou: Oh, it's nothing.

Some invitation for a party at, uh...

Club ares.

Chuck: Who is stavros demetrios?

Lou: My ex.

He owns the place.

Why, do you know him?

Chuck: No, not really, no.

Lou: Good.

You don't want to.

He thought I was dating some guy and he trashed his car.

Threatened to k*ll him.

Believe me, the last thing you want is that lunatic swimming around in your head.

Beckman: stavros demetrios, a handsome playboy, owns and operates a number of la clubs.

Chuck: I don't think he's that handsome.

Beckman: He's the son of yari demetrios, the shipping magnate.

Chuck: What do you mean by playboy?

What kind of intel do we have on that?

Beckman: What we have is information that a volatile package is coming to los angeles.

The cargo itself is time-sensitive, which, knowing the demetrios family ties to the middle east, could mean a w*apon.

Sarah: Chuck, we need you to get as close to stavros as possible and see if you flash on anything related to the shipment.

Chuck: What? What? You want me to get close to my girlfriend's ex?

How do you want me to do that?

Plus, I don't want to get her involved in all this.

Casey: why don't you and your girlfriend hit club ares tonight?

I hear it's supposed to be all the rage.

Lester; How's my breath?

Jeff: Like the ocean.

Lester; Aye, aye, captain.

Morgan: Are you kidding me?

Everybody in this place is scoring.

Chuck's on to his second lady.

What do we got?

Nothing.

Jeff: I don't know about you, but I intend to make the most out of the seeds I've been planting.

Morgan: What are you talking about?

Jeff: I'm gonna tag anna.

Anna: Are you kidding?

You make me sick.

I'd rather get with Morgan.

Sarah: Hey, larry, what can I get for you?

Lester: Lester.

I want to say I was sorry to hear about you and Chuck.

And if you needed someone to talk to, i'm here for you.

Sarah: That's very sweet.

Thank you.

Lester: Want to catch a movie?

Grab a bite?

Sarah; You're asking me out a day after I broke up with your friend?

Lester: All's fair in love and w*r, Sarah.

Sarah: You know what you seem like to me?

Lester: Hmm?

Sarah: A man who...

Knows what he wants.

Sure, you know, We could go through all the motions-- coffee, movie, dinner-- or we could just skip all of that nonsense and I could just devour you right here.

This should hold us.

Lester: It's, it's an interesting, uh, thought.

Let me think about that proposition.

Whoops.

Your feet seemed to have slipped...

Is that jeff, uh, calling me?

I-i will be right there, jeff!

I'm just gonna...

Sarah: What about that movie?

Hey, Lou.

Hi.

Lou: Hi.

Nice to see you again.

Sarah: You know, he's a great guy.

Lou: Yeah, um, I've had the same opinion so far, too.

Sarah; It's not an opinion, it's a fact.

Don't hurt him.

Lou: Okay.

Wasn't planning on it.

Thanks for the heads up, though.

Lou: Excuse me.

Hi. Do you know where I can find Chuck?

Morgan; Ah, the sandwich maker.

I have heard so much about you.

Lou: Thank you.

Morgan: And I must be...

Lou: A guy who works at the buy more?

Morgan: Close.

Morgan grimes.

Chuck's best friend, soul mate.

He hasn't mentioned me.

Lou: Sorry.

Morgan: Probably means he doesn't think you're gonna be sticking around for a while.

Chuck: Hey.

There you are.

I'm glad you two finally met.

Yeah.

Hmm.

Lou: I brought you some lunch.

Morgan: Oh, thank you.

Mmm, I smell salami, black olives tapenade.

Okay, this, this might actually have a sh*t at working out.

Chuck: Well, Morgan approval, that's very big.

Lou: I seem to be getting that from all angles today.

Just had a moment with your ex.

Chuck: Did ya?

Yeah, she's, uh, she can be a little overprotective sometimes.

But speaking of exes, um, I was thinking maybe, uh, we could go to that party thing at ares tonight.

Lou: No. You know what?

Trust me, bad plan.

Chuck; Look, sooner or later he's gonna find out about me, and I'd rather just...

Make the peace now.

Lou; Charming, handsome and brave.

You know, that's a combination I'm not used to.

Chuck: Yeah, it's a little...

Little new for me, too.

We're only on our second official date, and already I'm lying to her.

Casey: Relax.

It's dating in la.

Everyone lies.

We're going to be tapped into the club's surveillance feed.

All we need is the audio.

Sarah; This has an rk-7 mini mic that works up to 20 feet.

I want you to keep it as close to stavros as possible.

Chuck: Are you kidding? Are you kidding me with this?

I can't wear this.

This looks ridiculous.

Casey; The alternative is we join you on your date.

Chuck: Fine.

Sarah: Ear wig.

Chuck: It never stops with you people, does it?

Casey: Aren't you forgetting something, romeo?

Chuck: Let me guess.

This is equipped with some kind of microscopic, infrared tracking device that determines her mother's communist affiliations?

Casey: No, idiot.

It's so you can get laid.

Chuck; usually... I'm sorry.

I usually get more respect at the door.

You know, i-i come here a lot.

Normally, it's here on monday, on monday nights, and then...

And then, uh, tuesdays at hyde.

I'm on the circuit.

You know, I do my thing.

Lou: I can't hear a word that you're saying!

Chuck; What was that?

Lou: I love this song.

Do you want to dance?

Chuck: No. I normally, uh...

I normally require some social lubricant before entering a dance floor.

Stavros; Hello, sweetheart.

Lou: stavros.

Uh, this is Chuck.

Chuck, stavros.

Stavros: Hi.

Cool pin.

I'd have worn mine, but I lost it in the '80s.

Chuck: I kept mine.

Lou: Nice to see you.

Stavros: Whoa. Whoa.

Where you going?

At least let me buy your new friend a drink.

Chuck; No, thanks. Um...

Casey: have the drink, Chuck.

Chuck: Yeah, maybe... Maybe just one.

Stavros: Look, vip on me.

Anna: Way to own the noobs, Morgan!

Use your deep impact perk.

Morgan; Don't-don't backseat perk me.

I-i know when to use my perks.

Anna; I have to tell you, Morgan, I think you're one of the best call of duty 4 players in the store.

Morgan: Really?

You know, i-i heard what you said to jeff.

I think that you should not fight it anymore.

You know, just sort of, um, succumb to your desire, you know, just...

Anna: Morgan, what are you doing?

Morgan: I thought you wanted me!

Anna; Because I said I prefer you to jeff?

I'd take lester over jeff.

Doesn't mean I'm into that loser.

Morgan: But you'd take me over lester, right?

Okay, listen, can you keep this between me and you, please?

You know, don't-don't tell anybody!

Stavros: That's aged ten years in oak.

♪♪

Can you taste it, jack?

Chuck; Chuck, and, uh, yes, I think I did...

I think I did taste it, although, that-that also could have been a piece of my liver.

Stavros: I love this guy!

Lou: He's a charmer.

Chuck: Hey, you.

Lou: Hey.

Chuck: Hi.

Can I get you something, anything?

Can I get some more wine?

Stavros: Oh, don't do that, jack.

You don't want to get on her bad side.

Fiery italian.

Lou: Stavros...

Stavros: What?

You think I'm going to tell him about the trip to mykonos where you threw a lamp at my head?

Still have the scar.

Chuck; I thought... I thought you said she threw it at your head.

Stavros: She did.

The scar is from the make-up sex.

She's a tiger.

Casey: Get on with it, Chuck!

Chuck: Um, so stavros, uh, you're in the, uh...

You're in the club game?

Don't worry about it.

You seem nervous.

Chuck: I'm...

Stavros: Relax.

Chuck: I'm not.

Stavros; Ooh, you got a small neck, huh?

Chuck: Thank you very much.

Stavros; Like a chicken.

Casey: He does have a small neck.

Sarah: Maybe I should go in.

Casey: Same bit with you, huh?

Sarah; What's that supposed to mean?

Casey: You need me to spell it out?

Fine.

You fall for the guys you work with.

First Bryce, now our boy Chuck.

Sarah: Bryce was a mistake, and I haven't fallen for Chuck.

Casey: Yeah, whatever you say.

And just so we're clear, sister, not interested.

Stavros: Have you ever snapped a chicken's neck, Chuck?

Chuck; Can't say that I have.

Stavros; It's much easier than you would think.

Sarah: That's it. I'm going in.

Casey: Hey, no.

Hey!

Walker!

Sarah: Chuck?

Lou: Isn't that your ex-girlfriend?

Chuck: Yes, it is.

Yes.

Sorry.

Uh, she's having a hard time letting go.

It's happened to me before.

A lot, actually.

I don't... You know, I better go talk to her.

I'll be right back. I'm so sorry.

Hey, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Excuse me. Excuse me.

Hey, what are you doing here?

Sarah: I wanted to make sure you're okay.

Chuck: i'm on a...

I'm on a date, okay?

Just, you're ruining it right now!

I'm fine!I'm fine!

Just... Just go!

Sarah: Okay, fine.

But your girlfriend is leaving.

Chuck: Excuse me. I'm sorry.

Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me.

Hey, where are you going?

Lou: You've spent the entire night either with my ex or yours.

This date is over, okay?

I'm out of here.

Chuck: Lou, wait.

Lou: Excuse me.

Chuck: No, no.

Lou?

No, don't go!Don't go!Don't go!

Excuse me...

Casey? Casey, stavros' father yari just walked in!

Casey: I got it.

He's heading towards his son.

Get the mic closer.

I need to hear what they're saying.

Chuck, get over there!Now!

Damn it, Chuck, what are you waiting for?

Chuck: Okay. Excuse me.

I beg your pardon. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

Excuse me, I have to get...

I was just... I literally was just in there, like, two seconds ago.

Casey: Okay, Chuck, this is it!

Get the mic closer.

Chuck: Okay, you know what?

I probably... Was over there, so I'm going to...

Yari: Thank you.

4:00 tomorrow afternoon, san pedro.

The package is time sensitive, so, if it expires, we're all dead.

Casey: Got you.

Chuck: Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me.

Lou, wait!

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!

Great, great.

Sarah: Nice work, Chuck.

We know when and where the package is coming.

Mission accomplished.

Casey: How was the date?

Chuck: Is it me, or does our government never want me to have sex again?

Second message.

Chuck: Look, I totally screwed up, okay?

I'm more than comfortable blaming it on the alcohol, or global warming or my obscure allergy to neon...

But, hey, hopefully, I'll-i'll talk to you soon.

Okay. Thanks.

Buh-bye.

Damn it. You made me give her a buh-bye.

Casey: She won't talk to you?

You want us to cut her power, smoke her out?

Chuck: Wow. That's very romantic.

Why don't you just club her over the head and drag her out by her foot?

Look, I'll handle this one without the NSA, thank you.

Casey; You did a good job last night.

We're going down to the docks a few hours to intercept the package.

Chuck: You need me to go?

Casey: Yeah, if the crap hits the fan, we could use you, chicken neck.

Morgan: Chuck!Chuck!

What did you hear about last night?

And don't hold back.

Chuck: I don't know what you're talking about.

Morgan: I made a move on anna, and she sh*t me down, so, i...

Chuck: What? What? Anna? Anna? Really? I didn't know you liked anna.

Morgan; What's like got to do with it?

I figured you have a girl, I should have a girl, too.

Chuck: Uh, occasionally, on planet earth, men will consider their feelings for a woman before jumping atop them.

Morgan: You know, she's kind of cute in a freaky, little tigerish kind of way, you know?

But that's not my problem, dude.

Okay, what if she tells everyone?

I was just starting to get some street cred around here.

Chuck: Anna is very cool.

I'm sure that your rep is very secure, ese.

Morgan: No. They're talking about me.

You see this? I'm-i'm ruined, dude.

Okay, you got me!

Fun time at my expense.

Look, I tried to kiss anna.

She dissed me, all right?

I feel like a fool.

Are you happy now?

Anna: Morgan, we were laughing about Chuck getting dumped by the deli girl after he dumped the wiener girl.

Kind of poetic?

Lester: You tried to kiss anna?

Why?

Jeff: Dude, how could you?

I got dibs on anna.

Anna: I'm right here, you disgusting pig!

Chuck: I realize that this is dangerously close to bordering on stalker status, but, uh, look, i-i don't really care about that.

Look, maybe-maybe you're... Maybe you're calling me right now.

I don't know. And just give you the chance to...

Okay, okay. Um, so, uh, you know, if you...

If you get a sec, you can... You can call me back. Okay. Buh-bye.

Sarah: Won't call you back?

Chuck: I, uh... Yeah, I think her voice-mail is broken.

It's very, very common.

Sarah: I wanted to apologize for last night.

I suppose I jumped the g*n a little, and I didn't mean to interfere with your date.

Chuck: Yeah, not sure it qualifies as a date when you're bugged with CIA microphones and infiltrating an arms importer, but, hey, I'm new at this.

Sarah: Well, it's hard to have a real relationship in this line of work.

Chuck: Apparently, it's hard to have a fake one, as well.

Sarah: Well, if it's any conciliation, I never felt like our time together was work.

Oh, uh, gerber daises. Lou's favorite.

Chuck: How do you know that?

Sarah: Cia.

I had them check flower deliveries to her addresses from the last five years.

Chuck: Good tip.

Wait, wait. Lou, can I talk to you just one second? One second?

Lou: I'm busy.

Uh, who had the parma prosciutto?

There you go.

Twenty-seven!

You want to talk, get a number like everybody else.

Man: Who's got 28?

28 28

Who's holding 29? 29!Twenty-nine!

Casey: Federal agent! Down on the ground!

Sarah; Don't move!

Casey: Get the b*mb squad in here!

Let's go!

Man; 44!Who's holding 44? 44?

Chuck: 44!I have 44. Yes, yes, yes, yes!

Please, I'd like to speak to Lou, please.

Man; Well, buddy, it looks like you're gonna have to te another number.

45, who's got 45?

Sarah: You sure that’s a good idea?

Casey: Yeah, why not?

If it's a b*mb in there, we're all gonna go.

Might as well enjoy a last smoke.

b*mb squad captain: It's all clear!

Agent Casey, you better take a look at this.

Casey; What the hell...

Sarah: Someone knew we were coming.

Lou: 96? Anybody got 96?

Chuck: I just wanted to apologize about last night and explain...

Lou; I'm working. Do you want a sandwich?

Chuck; Yeah. I'll take a sandwich. x

Lou: Great. What'll you have?

Chuck: You guys carry wheat bread?

Lou; We do.

Chuck: Why don't you grab a couple slices of that?

Now, toss 'em and grab the seedless rye.

And while you're at it, grab some pastrami.

End cut, none of that lean crap.

Lou: A man with high cholesterol. Sexy.

Is that it?

Chuck: Oh, I'm just getting warmed up.

Cole slaw.

Lou: On the side?

Chuck: On the top, lather it on.

Lou: Swiss?

Chuck: Muenster.

Lou: Is that it?

Chuck: Well, after you shut it down and grill it, this is a hot sandwich, sweetheart.

In the reuben family.

Chuck: These are for you.

They were alive at one point.

Lou: Gerber daisies, they're my favorite.

Chuck: I'm really sorry if I acted like a jerk last night.

I was really nervous...

Lou: Shut up, Chuck.

Man: He had me at "pastrami."

Yari; Who are these people?

How did they find out about the shipment?

Stavros: I have no idea.

Yari: If anything goes wrong with this shipment, we are dead.

Katalava, stavros?

These people will k*ll us.

Stavros; What the hell is coming in that's so important, eh?

Yari: I don't know and I don't want to know.

Our job is to make the delivery, not ask questions.

Now, you find out who this belongs to and bring him to me.

Chuck: Morning, handsome.

Nice work last night.

Casey: Hey, lover boy.

Hasn't that mirror suffered enough already?

Chuck: I am in the bathroom.

Okay, is there nothing sacred to you people?

Casey: Just the right to bear arms.

You two look terrible.

Casey: Well, we were up all night explaining to our bosses why we raided a cargo freighter filled with nothing but air and a surveillance camera.

Sarah: The tip you gave us was compromised.

Someone set us up.

Casey: I think it was your sandwich maker.

Chuck: Are you kidding me, Lou? Please. Come on.

You don't want me to date for "national security" reasons, fine, just say that.

But I think this is a little pathetic.

And quite frankly, beneath you, Sarah.

Sarah: This was taken at the docks after your date.

Chuck: I'm sure she has a perfectly reasonable explanation for this.

Casey: Good.

Can't wait to hear it.

Sarah: Keep it.

We have plenty more.

Lester: Everyone in the mall's talking about you trying to hook up with anna.

Dude, the guys at the sbarro even named a pizza after you.

Jeff: No sauce, no toppings, nothing but pure cheese. It's called "the loser."

Lester: Hmm, let's grab a slice.

Morgan; I'm ruined.

Casey: Okay, Chuck, our intel says Lou should be meeting stavros behind the club.

Chuck: You guys are being paranoid.

There's no way Lou's showing up here.

Casey: Now you're mic'ed.

Chuck: Great. Great, thanks a lot.

And what will the sandwich police be doing on this stakeout?

Sarah: Here we go. We got company.

Casey: Believe us now?

Chuck: No.

As a matter of fact, I don't.

Sarah: Hey, Chuck, wait...

No, wait. No, damn it. I'm going after him. x

Casey: They have us on tape.

They recognize either of us, we could blow the whole operation.

Lou: Thank you, stavros.

Stavros:Oh, my pleasure.

So your friend, Chuck, where'd you meet him?

Lou: He works at the buy more, across from the deli.

I took my phone in to get fixed.

Why?

Stavros: Just seems like a great guy.

I'll be back with the rest.

Chuck: Well, hello, Lou.

If that is in fact your real name.

Lou: Chuck, what are you doing here?

Chuck: I think the question is what are you doing here?

Lou: None of your business.

Were you following me?

Have you been spying on me?

Chuck: Hold on a second, don't try and turn this around on me.

Okay, I'm not the one-- I'm not the one smuggling...

You know, what is this? What is this? Illegal, illegal things with my boyfriend.

Is that-- what is, what is that?

Lou: Portuguese cured sopresseto?

What'd you think was going to be in there?

Chuck; I, uh, I didn't quite know.

I just saw you with stavros and I suspected the worst.

Lou: Right, well, congratulations, Chuck.

Your suspicions have been confirmed. I'm a smuggler.

Chuck: You should probably keep that down.

Someone'll hear you, okay?

Lou: I know it's illegal!

There's no additives or preservatives in it.

It takes ten days to clear customs and by then it's gone bad.

Okay, don't get me started on the... ???

Sarah; I can't hear anything. I'm going in.

Casey; No, no, no, give him a minute.

You can't go in every time he breaks a nail.

Sarah: Just cover .

Chuck: I'm sorry, Lou. I made a really big mistake.

Lou: Looks like I did, too.

Sarah: Hey, what happened?

Chuck: I blew it...

Again.

Stavros: Yes, you did, Chuck.

You most definitely blew it.

Chuck: Why did you come in?

I had the situation entirely under control.

Sarah: Yeah, I can see that.

Casey: Damn it.

Chuck: I assume you have a plan to get us out of this mess.

Sarah: Right now Casey's tracking your gps device in your watch.

A swat team will be here any minute.

Chuck: Yeah, about the watch...

Casey: Idiot.

Chuck: Lou was incriminating herself and I didn't want her getting into trouble.

Sarah: Always the romantic, huh, Chuck?

Chuck: Jealous?

Sarah: It was foolish.

Do you really think the CIA is interested in a deli meat smuggler?

Chuck: Well, excuse me if I'm not Mr. Perfect spy.

We can't all be Bryce larkin, now can we?

Sarah: Who's jealous now?

Chuck: Me, jealous of you and Bryce?

Never.

Sarah: You said everything you want to say?

Chuck: More or less.

Sarah: Good.

Now, shut up.

You're sucking up all the air.

Morgan: Sorry I jammed my tongue down your throat.

Anna: No worries, Morgan.

Morgan: The lone wolf does it right.

You know, just jump around from mate to mate.

Never settles down.

This way...

He never gets hurt.

Anna: Maybe, but lone wolves are also lonely.

Casey: Food and drug administration.

Lou; How can I help you?

Casey: We know about the illegal meats you've been importing, miss.

The fda's been running a task force against the demetrios family for the last few months.

You're going dn for ten to 20 in a federal pen.

Lou: For salami?

Casey: For g*ns.

Lou: g*ns?

Casey: The demetrios family's been shipping g*ns into l. A.

, which means technically we can nail you for aiding and abetting t*rrorists.

Or you can help us.

Lou: What would I have to do?

Casey: Give me the dock number where you're receiving your shipments from stavros.

Lou: Dock 14b, the northwest pier.

Casey: Thanks.

By the way, miss, your pastrami is delicious.

Yari; Time is of the essence, so I will cut to the chase.

We have a very important delivery that is about to be picked up and we need to know who else knows about it.

Chuck: Okay, I'll talk!I'll talk!

Sarah: No, Chuck!

Chuck: We, we know all about...

The imported salami and, and, and, we're cool with it, man.

The real crime is that it's illegal to begin with.

Honestly, there's no need for t*rture, yari.

Yari: Mr. Bartowski, I'm not going to t*rture you.

Chuck: Great. Great, we're on the same page.

Yari; I'm going to t*rture her.

Chuck: No, no, no, no, no, no.

We're not on the same page anymore, yari, we're not even in the same chapter.

No, no, no, please don't!

You k*lled a whole family outside yerevan.

You stole their heirlooms, and you sold all of them on the russian black market except for that watch.

Stavros: How do you know that?

Chuck: Your name is vladimir snell.

Last year, you were paid $40, 000 to k*ll a man named leo koloff.

Stavros: You told me we were paid 20.

Vladimir: He's lying. He'll say anything to get out of trouble.

Stavros: He knows about yerevan.

He knows everything.

And you...

Owe me money.

Yari: Well, that settles that.

So...

If you will kindly tell me who else knows about our shipment.

Man: The package is here.

Berth 19.

We've got five minutes till it expires, sir.

Yari: All right, let's go.

We'll just have to k*ll them.

Chuck: There's a w*apon in the shipment.

I think it's some kind of chemical b*mb.

We have to get to it before it blows.

I'll hold the fort.

You go get the b*mb-- go!

Sarah: The b*mb's at berth 19.

Chuck, I want you to get a s far away from here as possible.

Chuck: I'm coming with you.

Sarah: No. Chuck.

You're not going anywhere near a live b*mb.

Chuck: Do you know how to diffuse a b*mb?

Do you have an intersect in your head?

I didn't think so.

Sarah: Hey!Chuck! Wait!

Stavros: Go, dad, go!

Go, dad, go!

Casey: It's over, yari. Drop the w*apon.

Yari: Okay. You got me.

Tommy: It's tommy.

We have a problem.

The package has been intercepted. We're going to have to clean things up.

Sarah: Here.

Help me out.

Chuck: Okay... Okay, intersect.

Flash.

Show me how to do this.

Sarah; Did you flash?

Chuck; No. Nothing.

Come on!

Come on, come on, come on, baby, don't fail me now.

Sarah; Okay, Chuck, that's enough. Run . I'm going to try and stay and defuse it.

Chuck: No, I'm not leaving you.

Sarah: Go. That is an order.

Chuck: No.

Sarah: I said go.

Chuck: Oh, I see.

So you're going to sh**t me to prevent me from getting blown up?

That's a great plan.

Sarah: Why are you so stubborn?

Chuck; Actually, I consider this a rare moment of courage.

I don't know where it's coming from, I guess you just bring out the worst in me.

Sarah: And you in me.

Chuck: It was nice knowing you.

Sarah: Well, the good news is, we're alive.

And the bad news is that this is kind of...

An uncomfortable moment right now.

Chuck; It's completely comfortable on my end.

Just saying.

♪ hey yeah ♪ ♪ under the sun ♪ ♪ you will find me ♪ ♪ under the sun ♪ ♪ nothing but blue skies ♪ select ingredients combine for sophisticated flavours, like sun-dried tomato.

Chuck: Look, i...

I know that you are so sick of hearing this, but I'm really sorry if I've acted like a jerk.

Lou: Chuck, I know who you really work for.

That you're an undercover agent.

Chuck: How do you...

Lou; That guy Casey from the food and drug administration came to see me, explained that you are an informant.

Chuck; Right my cover has been blown.

I'm an agent for the fda.

Lou: Can I ask you a question?

This whole time, did you ever really like me?

Chuck: Honestly?

Lou: Yeah.

Let's try that for the first time since we've met.

Chuck: Lou, you are everything that I'm looking for.

I just can't look right now.

Lou: Well...

Thank you for being honest.

The next time my phone breaks, i'm going to the large mart.

Chuck: Oh, that... That hurts.

Lou: And the next time that you're hungry...

Chuck; No, no, no, no.

Lou: Take it to the wienerlicious.

Chuck: I'm really going to miss the Chuck Bartowski.

Lou: So am i.

Chuck: Hey, Lou.

Lou: Yeah?

Chuck: I'm sorry.

Lou: Don't be.

Secret agent or no that was the best kiss I've had in a long time.

Anna: Hey, Morgan, can I borrow a pen?

Lester; He is so whipped.

Pathetic. Ridiculous.

Chuck: Whipped?

Morgan: Oh, yeah, I got a girlfriend now, Chuck.

Chuck; Anna?

Morgan; She couldn't resist my animal magnetism.

I almost feel bad for the kid. She never stood a chance, you know?

Anyway... Hey!

You and Lou, this friday, we'll double date.

Chuck; Lou and I broke up.

Morgan: What?

You're a free man?

Anna.

Hey, listen, it's, uh, it's Morgan.

It's over.

We had a good run, but, uh, lone wolf has to run free. Okay? x Chuck and Morgan train is on...

Track. Track. Track.

Chuck: Yeah, not really, though, 'cause, uh...

I'm going to get back together with Sarah I think.

Morgan: You couldn't say this ten seconds ago, huh?

Anna.

Honey?

Sweetie.

Casey: Whoever sh*t yari was here to pick up this package.

Sarah: Someone who didn't want yari to talk.

b*mb squad captain: All clear.

Looks mean, but it's non lethal.

That timer wasn't a fuse, it was measuring an oxygen supply.

This is Sarah. Please leave a message.

Chuck: Hi, it's Chuck.

Of course, it's me, it's me, it's Chuck.

Look, i-i was just wondering if you wanted to go out on a date tonight.

And by "date" I mean no gps and no mikes and no chaperones-- it'd just be us.

Sarah: Oh, my god, Bryce.

Casey; Didn't I k*ll him?

Chuck: I'm thinking maybe we could hit up sbarro.

They just named a new pizza after Morgan, and, uh, you know, I kind of wanted to support him.

So...

Okay.

Bye.