MARMADUKE: High school.
(SCOFFS)
(SCHOOL BELL RINGING)
Look familiar? Yeah.
Being a teenager,
it can be rough,
I'm not gonna
lie to you.
But if you're a teenager,
and the world doesn't
fit you,
you're totally hosed!
(MR. PITIFUL PLAYING)
Oh, Mr. Pit...
Oh, Mr. Pit...
Mr. Pitiful
Who let you down?
(G I RLS LAUG H I NG)
Who let you down?
Who let you down?
MARMADU KE: And the harder
you try to fit in,
the more awkward it gets.
Oh, Mr. Pit...
Oh, Mr. Pit...
Mr. Pitiful
Who let you down?
MARMADU KE:
Look at this poor guy.
Brutal!
Who let you down?
Who let you down?
MARMADU KE: But if you think
being a big, awkward teenager
is about the worst thing
that can happen to you,
try being
a 200-pound teenage dog
with a radar dish
wrapped around your neck!
Oh, yeah, that'll make me
real popular.
Luckily, they're
easy to take off.
Watch this.
PHIL: Marmaduke!
(GRUNTS) Told you!
PHIL: Where are you?
Hold your horses.
I'm Marmaduke, by the way.
I get yelled at a lot.
Come on, let's meet the fam.
The two-leggers.
You're gonna love them.
Here I come!
This little Padawan here
is Brian.
Like most kids his age,
he loves to hang out with me.
Come on, buddy.
I can't see!
Yeah, I'm pretty busy myself.
I'll catch you later.
And this social
butterfly here
is Barbara.
She loves to
play ball with me.
Okay, Barb,
you throw and I catch.
(CHUCKLES)
He can be like that.
Not like that.
Is somebody cooking?
Food!
Debbie's pretty cool,
and my main food hook-up.
She slips me a steak here,
some turkey there.
Which is why I think
she doesn't even care
when I help myself.
Come to daddy.
Ahhh! Hot cheese!
Oh, hot cheese!
(MUFFLED SCREAMING)
DEBBIE: Marmaduke!
(LAUGHING)
MARMADUKE:
The little one's Sarah.
How cute is she?
And she's my biggest fan.
You know, it's important
for them to get exercise
at this age,
so I try to take her
for a walk every day.
(LAUGHING)
She's got a great laugh,
doesn't she?
Then there's
my owner, Phil.
He's a marketing guy for
a local pet food company.
I call him
Doctor No sometimes,
'cause it's nothing
but rules with him.
No slobbering.
No barking.
No tackling the mailman.
Here, let's see
if he says no to this
awesome hole I'm digging.
Marmaduke, no!
See? Doctor No
in the house.
Why don't you just
give it a chance?
(SIGHS)
I will find China!
(EXCLAIMS) What you're doing
is cruel and unusual.
I hate water.
Come on. Sit.
Look, everybody's
got a weakness.
Sit.
Mine's water.
It's my kryptonite.
Sit.
Not sitting in this tub.
Sit, sit, sit.
Sit, Marmaduke!
What can I say?
I'm a sucker
for the kid.
Bye-bye.
Phil hates that.
Hey, Sarah,
where you going?
Stay.
There's nothing good
about getting a bath,
except for this!
Come on, Phil!
Not again.
Marmaduke!
Let's go! (WHOOPS)
Marmaduke!
I like to give Phil
a little exercise, too.
He's cooped up in
the office all day.
Come on, Phil.
That's the spirit!
PHIL: Get back here!
MARMADUKE: Over here!
Come here,
through here, Phil!
I'm over here!
Yeah, come on!
PHIL: Not this time...
You don't grab a tiger
by the tail!
(SCREAMING)
PHIL: Marmaduke!
MARMADUKE:
Someone call the ASPCA!
We got a crazy dog
on the loose!
Freedom!
(GROANS)
(SIGHS)
Hey, Dad.
What are you doing?
MARMADUKE: (GROANING)
Would it k*ll them to
install a new dog door?
I was two months old
when they got this.
I guess I had more pull
before the growth spurt.
Cue flashback.
BARBARA:
Oh, he's so cute!
MARMADUKE: (CHUCKLES)
See? Insanely cute.
Look at that lovable
little Marma-pup.
Come here, you!
But when you grow up
into this, I get it.
Not pretty.
I'd ignore me, too.
PHIL: Get back here!
Hey, I'm talking here!
Anyway, I try not to
hold things against Phil.
After all,
he's only human.
That's why I make it
a point to never go
to bed hungry.
Let's see
what we've got.
Sausage from
last week's barbecue,
gonna need to let that
breathe a few days.
This is our sh*t.
California,
the big leagues.
In the big leagues,
they take steroids and
cheat with supermodels.
It's a marketing job
with an organic
pet food company.
I think we'll be okay.
(SNIFFING)
Pepperoni pizza.
Phil's loafer?
No, I'll save it
for dessert.
And that,
I have no idea
what that is.
Aren't we okay
in Kansas?
Is that what
we wanna be?
Just okay?
MARMADUKE:
Coming in for a landing.
I wanna give you
and the kids the
life you deserve.
I want a bigger house
with a bedroom
that doesn't smell
like a meat-locker.
(LAUGHS)
This is our sh*t.
Well, if this is our sh*t,
then we should take it.
But you have to
tell the kids.
Done.
(CHOMPING)
Give me that.
Oh! Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Hey, I wasn't done
with that!
You don't have to worry,
I've got my supermodel
right here.
Wow!
Wait for it...
Wait for it...
(MARMADUKE FARTS LOUDLY)
Marmaduke!
Marmaduke!
What did you eat?
(GROANS)
(CHUCKLING)
I know it's juvenile,
but it's all I've got.
So, there you have it.
Day in the life of
old Marmaduke, here.
It's really bad!
MARMADUKE:
Guys, I am sorry.
That was a little much,
even for me.
Bad Marmaduke.
All right, enough.
Lights out.
(CHANTING) Waffles,
waffles, waffles,
waffles, waffles!
Yes!
Saturday morning waffles!
Got to love the Debster!
CARLOS:
(WITH SPANISH ACCENT)
Take it easy, man!
A waffle is to be
savored, not inhaled!
Hey, this is my
step-bro, Carlos,
by the way.
Say hey, Carlos.
Hey, Carlos.
He's pretty cool
for a cat, which helps,
since he's basically
my only friend.
You ready for
a bombshell?
Lay it on me.
Phil just told everybody
he got a new job.
We're moving
to the O.C.!
Shut up! Really?
No lie! I was so shocked,
I hacked that thing up.
(EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST)
Carlos, that's gross!
I know it's gonna take
time to adjust, honey,
but you'll make so many
new friends there.
I think it sounds
kind of cool.
What do you care?
All you do is
play video games.
This is so unfair!
MARMADUKE: I got to say,
I'm with Barbara on this one.
You know how many bones
I buried in the backyard?
Guys, this is
a once-in-a-lifetime
opportunity.
We'll have a big
new house with a pool
and a company car.
(SIGHS)
Pets are always
the last to find out!
I don't even know
where the O.C.'s at!
(CALIFORNIA PLAYING)
Okay, what's the deal?
Is it something I said?
SUMMER ON TV:
Something you weren't
supposed to say.
Does anyone even own
a pet in this place?
I haven't seen
a single dog so far.
It's kind of
hard to forgive you
if you don't mean it...
Oh! She's fine.
Okay, so far,
all I've learned about
The O. C. is that
no one has a pet
and Seth, here, is
a total drama queen.
You're the biggest
drama queen, amigo.
(SCOFFS) Me?
That's you, Carlos.
You're, like,
200 pounds of drama,
with a red collar!
Oh, really?
This conversation is over.
No, no, no!
(CARLOS SCREECHING)
Ejector seat.
Never fails.
And so,
moving day arrived.
And there was
a feeling of hope
and excitement for
the whole family.
Even Barbara was trying
to lend a hand.
BARBARA: That's mine...
MARMADUKE:
Carlos and I would
have pitched in, too,
(ANGRILY) but we were
being shipped air freight
and on lockdown!
Hey, let me out of here.
I'm not an animal!
Oh, yeah, I am.
Look what I got.
Debbie's meatballs!
That's my man, Phil!
There you go.
CARLOS: Looking out
for his own.
I don't know, Carlos.
Something's fishy here.
(MUFFLED) It's
Debbie's meatballs, man.
Don't question it!
Oh! I know
I shouldn't eat it,
but I can't help it.
Good boy! Good boy!
(MUFFLED)
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
I feel a little funny.
CARLOS: This is
a horrible mistake.
I requested
executive class!
I think Phil put something
in our meatballs!
Have you ever
looked at your paws?
I mean,
really looked at them?
Yeah, yeah.
I followed you
on many adventures.
But into
the great unknown mystery,
I will go first, amigo.
CARLOS: Timber!
(THUDDING)
Down and out.
(CALIFORNIA PLAYING)
California, here we come
Right back
where we started from
California!
(ALARM BEEPING)
MARMADUKE: Wake up!
I'm up, I'm up!
Come on, Phil, let's do it!
Same dog, different floor.
Yes! New city,
new house, new smells!
(WHOOPS)
Good morning,
Orange County!
(WHOOPS)
Oh, yeah.
Hang on a second.
Did you check out
that doggie door?
It fits! It fits!
Oh! Look at this.
It's got an ocean view!
And a pool!
This grass is so green!
(SNIFFING)
And this, by far,
the nicest bathroom
I've ever had.
Speaking of which,
a little privacy, please.
Oh, yeah, brown collar.
Good, that'll bring out
my eyes.
Come on, Phil, let's go!
Is that weird that your
boss wants to meet you
at the dog park?
That's how
they roll in Cali.
Don's a bit eccentric,
but that's what makes him
so successful.
MARMADUKE: Come on,
Phil, shake a leg!
Easy, buddy!
DEBBIE: Wait.
Pink?
Fuchsia. That's how
they roll in Cali.
Come on,
we're burning daylight.
Let's do it!
Don't worry about me,
I'll just be here
unpacking a thousand boxes.
MARMADUKE: Freedom!
PHIL: I promise I'll be
home early to help!
MARMADUKE: Let's go!
That's the company car?
(CALIFORNIA LOVE PLAYING)
California
knows how to party
California
knows how to party
In the city of L.A.
(WHOOPS) We are
living the dream, Phil!
We keep it rockin'!
Listen, big guy.
Things are gonna work
a little different out here.
Give me those.
Hey, that's part
of my look!
We need to impress
my new boss.
I need you
to be a good boy,
a very good boy.
Basically,
the opposite of you.
Hi. Morning!
Phil's got
nothing to worry about.
Why? Twelve simple words.
I've got a chance to
completely re-invent myself
and finally fit in.
In short, I've got
a new leash on life.
Pun intended.
(DOGS BARKING)
Wow, this is
Phil's office?
(EXHALES NERVOUSLY)
New life, here I come.
Time to bring my A-game.
Think small,
play it cool,
get your bark on.
Just relax.
Hey, how's it going?
Beautiful day, huh?
Oh, hey, cool sweater!
I'm sweating like a dog.
Come on, big M,
keep it together.
Just focus. Whoa!
What was that? Whoa!
PHIL: Cool it!
Hey, wait for me.
Marmaduke, heel!
Phil, wait, wait,
check it out!
Winslow, here.
Oh, Mr. Twombly,
there you are.
It's great to
see you again.
Who do we have here?
PHIL: (GRUNTING)
Come on, buddy!
Yeah! What's his name?
This is Marmaduke.
Marmaduke!
Well, you are one
handsome Great Dane,
you know that?
I'm starting to
like this guy!
You've got yourself
a beautiful best friend
there, Phil.
Thank you! Marmaduke and I,
we're like two peas in a pod.
Hmm.
Who's licking butt now?
Interesting.
I'm picking up
something else
here, also.
Absolutely not a purebred.
Really?
I'm sensing a little
English Mastiff.
(MUFFLED)
Hey, watch it!
Your guess is
as good as mine.
You don't know your own
best friend, Phil?
Sure. Uh...
I love dogs.
I can tell a lot
about a man by the way
he treats his dog.
That's why I like
working out here.
I can measure, first-hand,
who I'm dealing with.
(SNIFFING)
Watch it, Phil.
He can smell your fear.
Plus, you get all this
fresh air for
out-of-the-box thinking.
And, most importantly,
I get to spend time
with my little girl.
Jezebel.
MARMADUKE: Oh!
Hello, Cali!
Look at that fur!
Right. Take off your
shoes and let's walk.
You don't wear
shoes out here?
Come on, Phil.
Channel your inner canine.
Get some earth
between your toes.
It's not the earth
I'm worried about.
Stay out of trouble.
Good luck, Phil.
You're gonna need it.
Jezebel! Whoa!
(DOGS SNIFFING)
Hey, whoa, whoa.
Watch it!
Bakersfield.
What the...
He's definitely Midwest.
Boston?
I'm gonna say Kansas.
MARMADUKE:
How did you know?
It's a gift.
What's your handle, newbie?
My name's Marmaduke.
Yikes!
Immediately moving on.
Meet the g*ng.
The egghead, here,
is Raisin.
(BRITISH ACCENT)
Marmaduke.
A unique synthesis
of "marma",
the scientific name for
the jumping spider family...
Oh! Oh!
I hate spiders.
...and the Duke
of Marlborough,
the 17th-century
English statesman.
And the ultra-confident
Chinese Crested over here
is Giuseppe.
Before you ask,
yes, I'm a real dog.
No, I'm not a chew toy.
And I just get a little
nervous sometimes because
we live in California.
This is the land
of the puma!
There are no pumas
in Southern California.
(WHISPERS) Pumas!
They come out of nowhere.
I'm Mazie, by the way.
Good to meet you guys.
Hey, you come here a lot?
It's the dog park, man.
It's like high school
for dogs,
which means
there's a few packs
to know about.
First,
you got your jocks.
FEMALE DOG:
Nice catch, Brad.
The only muscle
they don't use
is their brain.
O-M-G, Brad is H-O-T!
MAZIE: They mostly date
Afghans. Who actually
have no brain.
Oh! Frisbee!
Then you got
your drama geeks.
MALE DOG:
We're innocent.
Don't sh**t!
Bang, bang.
MAZIE: And over here,
your mushroom heads.
Somebody stop
this thing, man.
I got to get off, bro!
Then there's
your out-and-out
juvenile delinquents.
DELINQUENT DOG: (LAUGHS)
Come on! Let's go, go!
Word to the wise,
avoid the water bowls here.
MAN: (SPITTING)
Oh, come on! Again?
MARMADUKE: (SIGHS) So far,
I'm not seeing anyone I'd
really fit in with.
Well, if you think you
got the game, you could
roll with our crew.
Oh, yeah?
Who's your crew?
THUNDER: Mutts!
LIGHTNING: Mutts!
(DOGS LAUGH)
THUNDER: Weird!
Who are those guys?
The pedigrees,
a.k.a. trouble.
GIUSEPPE: (STUTTERS)
They're rich,
and they're spoiled
and they act like
their fleas don't bite.
It's ridiculous!
The little land shrimps
are Thunder and Lightning.
Dog Vader over there
is the man himself, Bosco.
Alpha male
who runs the park.
He's the toughest
dog around.
(SCOFFS) Him?
He doesn't look
that tough.
His girlfriend over there
is Miss Perfect, Jezebel.
And he's super-jealous,
so stay away from her
or he'll turn you into...
BOSCO: Dog food.
Hello, losers.
MAZIE:
Speak of the devil.
So, I see you got
a new mutt friend.
Okay, that's wet.
Shut up, Thunder.
What's his name?
(STUTTERS)
Uh... Marmaduke.
Mama-what?
Well, well. My little
fireplug said you were
salivating on my girlfriend.
No, no. I remember,
somebody walked by
eating beef jerky.
Let me explain something.
This is my park,
and these are my rules.
You look at my
girlfriend again,
and you're dead.
You come near her,
you're dead.
You talk to her,
and you're...
BOTH: Dead.
We're dead.
Yeah, we're dead!
He ain't nothing, watch.
(SHOUTING) Come on,
you wanna go?
You wanna go?
No! No! No, no, no.
Didn't think so.
Welcome to the O.C., mutt.
LIGHTNING: Yeah,
stand clear, Horsie.
(BOTH IMITATE
HORSE NEIGHING)
See you at the
party tonight, not!
(BOTH LAUGHING)
Can I open
my eyes now?
RAISIN: Don't listen
to that guy.
Maybe listen to
the part about
staying away
from his girlfriend
or he'll k*ll you.
What party was he
talking about?
Nothing, just a bunch of
snobs scratching themselves
under the yacht club pier.
We're having our
own party tonight.
It's gonna be
a classic O.C. rager,
you should totally come.
Not sure if
I can get out,
but I'll try.
Great, it's gonna be
a really good party!
If you know what a party's
like, it's gonna be better
than that.
Tell them you know me!
You'll get right in.
Thanks, Giuseppe!
(SIGHS) Good first day,
Marmaduke.
You played it cool.
And I think I impressed
a lot of dogs here today.
Now, that is
a pretty good...
Bee! Ahhh!
A bee!
Get off of me now!
Look out!
Phil, help me!
DON: Bark Organics
dominates the
California market.
With our product
recognition and quality,
we're in a position
to crush the competition.
(MARMADUKE SCREAMING)
So, Dorothy,
why have I called you
all the way from Kansas?
Why have I been through
six marketing directors
in the last year?
Because I want
Bark Organics
on the shelves
in every PETCO
in the country.
MARMADUKE: Bee!
I can't see! Bee!
I won't
let you down, sir.
We'll see.
MARMADUKE: Watch out!
Coming through!
Sorry!
Are you okay?
Was that your dog?
I didn't get a good look.
Yeah, I'm fine.
(CHUCKLES) I'm fine!
It takes a lot
more than that...
(DON GROANING)
MARMADUKE: Bee!
That dog!
Phil, help!
Phil, get rid of him!
Help me!
Why do bees hate me?
What a gargantuan spaz!
Yeah, but kind of funny.
Hmm.
I heard a vicious rumor
that you're, like,
from Kansas?
Yeah. Are those,
like, real dogs?
The canine accessory
is so essential.
(SPANISH ACCENT)
We are not accessories.
(SPANISH ACCENT)
Hey, man, in my country,
I was a lawyer.
(SPANISH ACCENT) I've been
in this purse so long,
I can't feel my legs.
GIRL: Bodie is
so gorgeous!
Did he just
look at me?
As if!
Yeah, you're probably
right. He probably
wasn't looking at me.
(CAR HONKING)
Hey, honey!
Oh, my God!
Is that thing yours?
No, it's somebody
else's dog. Not mine.
Hey, Barb!
Who are your friends?
(GIRLS LAUGHING)
Phil! That was not cool!
Sorry, Barb.
(SIGHING)
Right. Regional
market share first...
MARMADUKE: Yeah, yeah.
Come on, Phil,
get off the phone.
Brian's going to bed.
BRIAN: Night, Dad.
Hey, Brian, wait up.
Sounds good.
We'll talk tomorrow.
Chill, Marmaduke.
Great news!
I ran into another
dad at the dog park,
and guess what
he's in charge of?
I signed you up!
Oh. Soccer sounds...
Great, right?
(WHINES)
Sure, yeah.
Man, you're
gonna love it.
Okay. Good night, Dad.
Good night, buddy.
Phil, he's not gonna love it.
He's gonna hate it,
you knucklehead!
Come on!
I really miss
you guys, too.
But I did see this
cute surfer kid today.
You need anything, honey?
A little privacy,
and a one-way ticket
back to Kansas.
Good night.
Come on, Phil.
It's like you're
not listening to them.
(SINGING)
Lullaby, lullaby
All the humans
are sleeping
(CARLOS SMACKING LIPS)
Ladies, please!
(PURRING)
MARMADUKE: (WHISPERS)
Carlos, be quiet!
Your eyes are
getting sleepy.
So sleepy.
Good night, Phil.
(BOUNCE BACK PLAYING)
Hey, yo, when I wake up
moaning, yawning
I put up my hands
Thank the Lord
for what I got
and never stop my plans
Giving all for the goals
Got to keep it up,
never let my head drop
Make me a home on my own
Better make the bed rock
(BOUNCE BACK
PLAYING IN THE GARAGE)
GIUSEPPE:
I'm a monster!
I am a tiny monster.
I'm doing the spin!
This is an O.C. rager?
You made it, great!
Come watch Giuseppe
rip it up!
(HOWLS) Check this out!
One leg, one leg...
MAZIE: Hey, Marmaduke!
If you're hungry or thirsty,
the trash can's out back.
And the toilet's in there.
Cool, thanks!
(TOY COW OINKS)
(LAUGHS)
Did that cow just oink?
RAISIN: Meet Mazie's cow.
The factory made a mistake.
It's pretty ridiculous.
Cow that oinks.
I think it's cool!
(LAUGHING) New record!
Holler at your boy!
Marmaduke, you're up!
(STAMMERS)
No, that's cool.
I'll just watch.
Don't be a wiener dog!
Just dance along to
the flashing arrows!
(MARMADUKE BLABBERING)
I'd love to,
but seriously, guys,
I've got four left paws.
Duke!
ALL: Duke! Duke! Duke!
All right, all right,
twist my paw.
ALL: Duke! Duke!
Atta boy!
(EENIE MEENIE PLAYING)
Okay, let's see.
This can't be that hard.
Okay, let's see.
Right paw, white arrow.
Left paw, blue arrow.
No, no, left paw,
green arrow.
MAZIE: There we go!
On second thoughts,
maybe this wasn't
such a good idea.
Hang on,
give him a chance.
MARMADUKE:
You can do this, Marmy.
Come on. Come on.
Come on, concentrate!
RAISIN: Ease into it.
Are we insured?
No one puts Dukey
in a corner!
The Duke's got
some moves!
You ain't seen nothing yet!
(WHOOPS)
Time to get funky!
(BARKS)
He's better than me,
isn't he?
In a way, yes.
MARMADUKE: Three-sixty
on the big dog!
Pinwheel time!
Time to go old-school!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry, guys.
My bad.
No sweat. I needed
to get a Wii, anyway.
There goes Giuseppe's
entire social life.
That was the only thing
I wasn't afraid of.
You know, not that
I'm not having fun,
because I totally am,
what do you guys think about
going to the yacht club party,
see what's up?
Are you crazy?
Or we could just go
to the zoo, and jump
into the puma cage!
Come on, it'll be fun!
Question.
Are we gonna spend
the rest of our lives
hiding underneath the porch
with the little pups?
Or are we gonna
get out in the yard
with the big dogs?
But we're not big dogs,
we're tiny dogs!
That phrase was made
for dogs like you!
You do realize
it's Bosco's party.
Yeah, Bosco, Schmosco!
He's all bark, no bite.
Okay. Some dogs
just have to learn
the hard way.
GIUSEPPE: I smell rain,
and I did not dress
for rain.
I'm telling you guys,
without fur,
it's like tiny b*ll*ts
from the sky.
(GASPS)
(WHISPERS) It's him!
Who is that?
Chupadogra.
(GROWLS)
Chupadogra?
RAISIN: They say he was
the ultimate alpha dog.
But then he went
insane from rabies
and ate his owner.
GIUSEPPE: He also
sleeps on a giant pile
of his victims' bones.
Can we go now,
before I become
an appetizer?
Let's go.
GIUSEPPE: I can't believe
we survived Chupadogra!
RAISIN: And now
he knows your scent.
Why would you
say that?
You sure you
wanna do this?
Oh, yeah.
You bet I do.
GIUSEPPE: Guys,
I'm telling you,
the tide is rising!
(HIP-HOP MUSIC BLARING)
(DOGS CHATTERING)
MALE DOG: Twenty-four,
come on, you can do it.
Twenty-five!
Man! Now, this party
is off the leash!
(CAT SCREECHING)
What are they doing
to that cat?
What pedigrees do best.
Humiliate the innocent.
Hey, wait,
what are you doing?
Don't go over there!
Come on,
let's get our bark on.
Oh, oh...
Oh, sorry.
I'll go this way.
(JEZEBEL CHUCKLES)
No problem. Sorry.
This unfortunately
happens to me all
the time.
Me, too.
(LAUGHS FAKELY)
Oh, brother!
(GROWLING)
Great, we're getting
mad-dogged. Let's bail!
BOSCO: Well, well, well.
If it isn't the dog
and pony show.
Did the circus
give you guys
the day off?
We're just leaving Bosco,
back off.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
What's the hurry?
You just got here.
(DOGS GROWLING)
You know, it's funny,
with ears like that
I would have thought
you heard me tell you
to stay away
from my girlfriend.
He told him.
You told him,
like, 12 times...
Zip it!
Zipped!
Being a pedigree means
you're exceptional.
We're all bred
for a purpose
and have gifts you could
never dream of having.
Stuart's an expert tracker.
Shasta is
a master sled dog.
Ferdinand is fluent
in six languages,
including gopher.
(CHITTERING)
And I'm the reigning
SoCal surf champ.
Are you good
at anything? Huh?
Um... Uh...
Sit!
(LAUGHS) You are
good at something!
(DOGS LAUGHING)
Lay down. Lay down!
That's it.
Oh, no!
This is bad, isn't it?
Yes, it's very bad.
I don't care
how freakishly large
you are, Donkey Boy.
We all know that
inside you're just
a scared little pup!
Did I say you
could get up?
MARMADUKE: No, no. Please!
Did I say you
could get up?
I'm sorry!
No mercy, boss.
Put him in
a doggie bag!
ALL: (CHANTING)
Fight! Fight! Fight!
MARMADUKE: I don't
wanna fight you.
Bosco, stop!
Relax, baby! We're
just horsing around.
No, you're not.
You're being a bully.
(CHUCKLES)
I'm sorry, he gets this way
when he drinks too much
drain-pipe water.
He gets that way
because he's a jerk.
You watch yourself, tomboy.
Come on,
we're out of here.
(STAMMERING)
Come on, baby,
are you gonna spend time
with them or with me?
It's a party,
let's have fun!
BOSCO: See you later,
when there's not any girls
around to save you.
Mutt.
(WHINES)
(MIMICS NEIGHING)
(DOGS LAUGHING)
Bosco's right
about everything.
I'm just a Gigantor freak.
Wasn't bred for anything,
but getting in the way.
You know, if I had a bone
for every time someone said,
"Put a saddle on that thing!"
or, "How's the weather
up there?"
I'd be a bone-illionaire!
Just once in my life,
I'd like to fit in,
you know?
Look, I know
what it's like
to be an outsider.
Okay? I was a rescue dog.
Nobody wanted me.
But you're better
than any of those guys,
and I can prove it.
I can make you
into the dog
you wanna be.
Really? Why would
you do that for me?
Because you're my friend.
(BELL TOLLING)
Wait, what time is it?
Oh, man,
Phil's gonna get up soon.
I got to go!
I'll see you later!
(MARMADUKE BARKING)
You're welcome.
I just made it.
(SIGHS) I am b*at.
I am so tired.
I'm exhausted.
(BEEPING)
Oh! Phil,
hit the snooze!
Time for work,
big guy.
Oh, Phil,
you're k*lling me.
DON ON PHONE:
Winslow, Twombly.
I need that new campaign
and I need it yesterday.
So what do you got?
Yeah. I got some
great ideas percolating,
I just need
a little time
to flesh them out.
See, you got nothing.
No, you can count on me.
It's gonna be a home run.
It better be.
Yeah, bye.
(PHONE BEEPS)
I got nothing.
(EXCLAIMS IN FRIGHT)
Bee! Bee! Phil, get him!
Marmaduke, relax!
Phil, I hate bees!
Get back.
Bee! Bee!
He's gonna sting us!
He's gonna sting me
and give me rabies!
Phil, Phil, get rid of him!
Marmaduke, chill, relax.
They're just surfers.
Marmaduke,
you're a genius!
I am?
A surf competition
for dogs?
Picture this.
Man's best friend
surfing towards shore,
throngs of owners
cheering them on.
How's that gonna sell
organic dog food
to the heartland?
Eleven o'clock, Phil.
Listen, if you wanna
sell to the Midwest,
I'll tell you how.
Be true to
who you are.
Bark Organics was made
in Southern California,
embrace that.
Bring the iconic spirit
of the West Coast
to every dog owner
across the country.
I don't know.
I hired you to
create an identity
for this company
and you're telling me
to be myself?
You know, we only have
one sh*t with PETCO.
I know.
But you got to
trust me on this.
All right.
One sh*t.
Make it happen.
Yes!
Okay, mutt-makeover
begins now.
First things first.
All right,
I'm all ears, literally.
Pig Cow is yours.
Check, Pig Cow's mine. Why?
He's a real
confidence booster.
Of course he is.
You just chew on him
when you get nervous.
Noted and filed.
Next up,
let's smell that breath.
(EXHALES)
(SNIFFING) Whoa!
Oh, buddy!
(EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST)
Really, that bad?
That needs work. Okay,
pedigrees have dental
hygienists, all right?
So garbage breath
is not gonna cut it.
Stay out of trash cans
and eat more
mint-based items.
Okay, less trash,
more mint.
And stand up proud.
Your ancestors sat
at the foot of kings, man.
Yeah.
Let's put the "Great"
back in "Dane" here.
Yeah, like this?
Um...
You know, just maybe
keep your ears up, too,
while we're at it.
Ears up. Like this?
Yeah, that looks fine.
Just out of curiosity,
do you think
any of this stuff
would work with girls?
(STAMMERS) Did you
have anyone in mind?
Not specifically,
just thinking out
loud here.
Oh! (LAUGHS AWKWARDLY)
Right, right, okay.
No one specific.
That's good.
(SIGHS SADLY) Okay...
Listen up, Barkanova.
If it were me,
I'd want him to take me
to the junkyard.
It's really
romantic there at night.
There'd be a blanket
with some treats spread out,
music from an old car
radio playing softly.
Yeah, and lots of
great old stuff
to pee on, right?
Oh! You've got
so much to learn.
Here's the deal.
Girls want romance.
You know? Mystery.
Wow.
What?
You know, I never
really noticed before,
but you have really pretty...
(SIREN WAILING)
Fire truck!
Hey, buddy,
we're talking here.
Fire truck!
MAZIE: Heel!
Oh, sorry.
Where were we?
Uh... You said I
have really pretty...
PHIL: Got to go, buddy.
Work to do.
No! Wait, Phil,
no, not now!
Hey, where are you going?
MARMADUKE:
Phil, I need this.
Come on. Let's go.
MAZIE: "Really pretty" what?
(MUFFLED) What?
(SIGHS)
MARMADUKE: (MUFFLED)
Carlos, let me
ask you something.
Is my breath
really that bad?
CARLOS: A tube
of toothpaste
is a good start,
but you're gonna
need more than that.
(EXCLAIMS)
Dude, watch it!
Just gave myself
a tongue-bath.
Sorry.
(EXHALING)
How's my breath now?
(SNIFFING)
Refreshingly minty.
Who am I kidding?
Minty breath,
better posture.
This stuff's
never gonna work.
These guys have real skills.
I could never speak gopher.
Why would you want
to talk to gophers?
(SIGHS) Forget it.
Breaking into
new cliques is tough
and breaking into bird cages
is even tougher. (BELCHES)
I just don't get it.
I'm a dog
and you're a cat,
we get along great.
That's because
you're my hermano.
If we weren't related,
I'd scratch both
your eyes out!
(SCREECHES)
(LAUGHING)
Don't make me laugh.
You could never take me.
I'd cream your
furry little butt...
Carlos, you're a genius.
What is he doing?
Say, does anybody
smell that?
I smell a cat
and I hate cats.
Cat! There's
no cat here.
(LOUDLY) I said,
"I smell a cat."
(SCREAMING)
Where am I?
THUNDER: Hey boss,
there is a cat!
No, no, no.
This one's mine, fellas.
Is this a dog park?
I must be horribly lost.
Oh, yeah,
you must be lost, cat,
because this park
is for dogs only.
THUNDER:
I got the tail!
You said there'd
only be a few dogs.
It's a dog park.
What do you
want me to do?
The sun's out,
it's crowded today.
This is gonna
cost you, big time!
Fight! Fight!
CARLOS: Whoa!
What a crowd!
Who let the dogs out?
This doesn't
look good!
Please don't
hurt me, Mister.
I'm just a poor,
incredibly attractive,
ultra-intelligent cat,
who has lost his way.
You're gonna need
all nine lives after this
b*at-down, pussycat.
You are the biggest,
baddest dog I have
ever seen in my life.
You also seem very
cool and confident.
You're right
about all of that,
you little
Fancy-Feast-eating freak!
Please! Spare my life!
Spare this.
(MEOWS)
Come on, sell it, man.
Sell it.
Really? Okay.
Left jab, left jab,
work the body.
(CARLOS SCREECHING)
Get back here,
you good-for-nothing
little fur-ball!
(WHISPERS) I only
weigh six pounds.
This officially
hurts now. Stop!
No, no, keep going,
keep going. I think
it's working.
Maybe we can find
a happy medium?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Hey, everybody,
watch this!
CARLOS: No, no, no!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Dizzy!
(GROANS)
Hairball. (SPITS)
What's the matter,
Bigglesworth?
Dog got your tongue?
Yeah, whatever, man.
Hope you got
what you wanted.
(MEOWING)
THUNDER: (LAUGHS)
That was hilarious,
Marmadonk!
Yeah, you're not
as good as Bosco,
but you took that
fleabag to school!
Oh, please, it was a cat.
It's not like he k*lled it.
You've got a keen
sense of smell.
(STAMMERS) Oh.
Well, thanks. It must
be the large nostrils.
I have to go, but maybe
I'll see you around.
Cool! I'd like that.
BOSCO: Jezebel,
let's go. Now!
You know,
I have a pretty
good nose myself
and when I'm around you
I smell potential,
with a hint of
something minty.
I like it.
BOSCO: Let's go!
It worked!
She talked to me!
What are you doing?
That's not what
we talked about!
MARMADUKE: Who cares?
She liked my minty breath!
Welcome to the First
Annual Bark Organics
Dog Surfing Competition.
Dogs and owners,
make your way to
the shore. Cowabarka!
(DOG BARKING)
Hey, I know you.
You go to Marshall, right?
The new girl.
That's me.
You ever not
on that thing?
You ever not
on that thing?
(LAUGHS)
I'm Bodie.
I know. I mean...
Yeah, I'm Barbara.
Is that your dog?
No, no, no.
That's my dad's dog.
Huh. That's too bad.
He's way better
than those
lame purse dogs.
Well, I did kind of adopt him
as my own, though. (CHUCKLES)
The dog, not my dad.
Yeah, Marmaduke and I
are super close.
(LAUGHS)
My friend's having
a party next weekend.
You should come.
Sure, I'd love to.
Competition's starting.
b*at it, Hasselhoff.
(WHISPERS) Dad,
what are you doing?
You're way too young,
and I'm way too busy to
talk about this right now.
(SCOFFS)
And, just put
some clothes on.
Can I get you
anything, Deb?
He's cute!
BRIAN: Hey, Marmaduke,
can you keep a secret?
Probably.
I've been telling Dad
I'm going to soccer practice,
but I've actually
been hanging out
at the skate park.
I think that
sounds cool, Brian.
But you got to
tell your dad.
I don't even
like soccer.
I guess I just don't know
how to tell him the truth.
I hear you, bro,
but just hang in there.
I wish you could talk.
And I wish you could
understand me.
PHIL: Come on, Marmaduke!
Hey, Brian, you okay?
BRIAN: Yeah.
What do you say we kick
that ball around later?
No, I'm good.
PHIL: Come on, buddy.
MARMADUKE: Wait! Phil! Phil!
Hold on, Phil.
Brian's got something
to tell you.
It is a beautiful day here
in Southern California
for dog surfing.
Please, put your
paws together for
our canine competitors!
Aha! And here's our
marketing director,
Phil Winslow.
Phil, this is David King,
Jessica Colestat from PETCO.
Pleased to meet you.
I hope you're ready
for a mind-blowing
canine surf experience.
(LAUGHS) Wow! Can't wait
to see this big guy
out on the waves!
DON: No, no, no.
Phil and Marmaduke
are one month removed
from Kansas.
I don't think
they're ready
to hang 10.
Well, that's too bad.
That would've been
hysterical.
Yeah!
(STAMMERS) No, you're right!
That would be hysterical!
Phil?
Phil, come on,
they're just kidding.
Say no!
Marmaduke's dying
to hang 20.
Dying to.
Oh! We're dead!
No, no, no. Phil, no!
PHIL: Let's go, buddy.
Come on.
It's just water.
No. Way too big and
too wet! Cold, cold!
That's my competition?
This ought to be fun.
Freezing, freezing!
No! Marmaduke!
Cold, cold!
Come on,
get back here. Heel!
MARMADUKE:
Happy thoughts,
happy thoughts.
I'm running through a meadow.
I'm peeing on everything.
You don't stand
a chance, Shamu.
I own these waves.
Good luck to you, too.
It's okay, Marmaduke.
Nothing bad's gonna happen.
Something bad's
gonna happen, Phil.
Payback's gonna hurt.
Okay, stay.
It's okay.
Ladies and gentlemen,
take a look,
on the horizon,
a massive,
rogue wave approaches!
You got to be kidding!
Time to dazzle.
PHIL: It's all you, buddy.
Phil! No, no,
what are you doing?
Phil, help me.
Phil, no!
PHIL: Good luck!
Somebody get me
off this thing!
What am I doing?
BOSCO: Out of
my way, poser!
Look out!
I've got
the right of way!
Oh, boy!
Look out!
Phil, help me!
Look at this!
It's Marmaduke!
Look at
the perfect position here,
Marmaduke in the barrel.
Yeah!
Get me off this thing!
Help! Marmy don't surf!
He doesn't look like
he's gonna make it.
Where is he?
(STAMMERS)
I don't know.
(SCREAMING)
Oh, man,
I'm gonna die!
No, you're not.
Get a hold of yourself!
Grip it and rip it!
Geronimo!
There he is!
(SCREAMING)
Take a look at this!
He throws a big air!
What a crazy dog!
(SCREAMS)
Look out! Look out!
And the Duke shreds!
This dog rules!
Marmaduke!
PHIL: You did it, buddy!
MARMADUKE: Oh!
Get me out of here!
That's my dog!
Get this
seaweed off me!
It burns! It burns!
Debbie, help!
DOG 1: Yeah!
DOG 2: That was awesome!
MARMADUKE: Really?
That was off the hook!
DOG 3: The Duke
has arrived, y'all!
MARMADUKE: It was?
DOG 2: You totally
shredded, dude!
I shredded?
That was way better
than Bosco, dude!
Marmaduke shreds!
All right, here it is.
The overall surf champion...
You think it was funny
dropping in on my wave
like that, Marma-puke?
I didn't do
anything, Bosco!
Let it go,
it was an accident.
And the trophy
goes to...
This better be me.
Whoa! We have an upset.
The trophy goes
to Phil Winslow
and Marmaduke!
What?
Phil, did we really win?
I'm gonna tear
you apart, mutt.
I didn't do anything!
Somebody put a leash
on this dog!
Marmaduke!
MARMADUKE: Help!
(DOGS BARKING)
BOSCO: Get back here, mutt!
Whoa, whoa!
BOSCO: Get back here,
you poser!
MARMADUKE:
I don't even
like surfing!
Stop running,
you coward.
I'm gonna make you pay.
I am gonna make you pay!
(CROWD CLAMORING)
DOG 3: Come on, Duke,
you can take him.
This ends right here,
right now.
You know what?
You're right, Bosco.
This does end here.
(GROWLING LOUDLY)
Ow! My leg's cramping!
Ow! Ow!
Time out, time out!
No, bad dog!
Heel.
I'm so sorry
about this.
Get your dog
under control,
you understand?
Come on, folks,
I'm so sorry. Come on.
Come this way.
Hey, what's the new
surf champ doing
out here all alone?
Hey. I'm just kind of
here, taking a break
from the old family.
Well, I guess some people
just can't handle it
when you're top dog.
Really?
(SIGHS)
It's getting
a little cold out.
Wait, what about Bosco?
Forget about him.
There's a new dog in town.
And his name
is Marmaduke.
Hey, that's my name!
That's my name!
Marmaduke!
Say it loud,
say it proud!
(I WANT YOU TO PLAYING)
The moon was shining
on the lake at night
The Slayer T-shirt
fit the scene just right
Smeared mascara,
I looked into your eyes
I saw a light
(SIREN WAILING)
DOGS: Fire truck!
MARMADUKE: Fire truck!
Fire truck!
Hi! Phil Winslow.
Anton, master of
the Top Dog method.
I'm supposed to listen
to a guy named Anton?
(DOGS BARKING)
(SHOUTING)
Top dog him, Phil.
Top dog him.
PHIL: Marmaduke!
Guys, what's going on?
Let's go.
What are you doing?
Out of the car!
Let's go.
Oh...
Pump your fists triumphantly,
and say it to the world,
"I'm top dog!"
MARMADUKE: Rubber bone!
I'm top dog!
MARMADUKE:
Bone! Give me!
GIUSEPPE: I thought
you said he'd be here.
He said he might stop by
after the pedigree party,
but he didn't
promise anything.
How much farther?
MARMADUKE: Just keep
coming. Keep coming,
we're almost there.
Where are we?
It's a surprise. Ready?
Hit it, boys! (BARKS)
JEZEBEL: Wow!
It's pretty cool,
isn't it?
(EXCLAIMS)
It's beautiful!
MARMADUKE:
Wait, wait, wait.
There's more.
Crank it, DJ Thunder!
(LET'S GET IT ON PLAYING)
I can't believe I'm
really here with you.
Of course you are, silly!
You're the alpha dog.
Okay, well,
I hope you're hungry.
JEZEBEL: Wow!
You really pulled
out all the stops!
It's just a little
something I whipped up.
How about a peanut
butter appetizer?
My favorite!
Really? I was worried
you might be allergic
to it.
I almost got
almond butter.
(MARMADUKE LAUGHS)
JEZEBEL:
It's so romantic!
I couldn't think
of another girl I'd
rather share it with.
It's so creative, too.
Tell me, how did you
ever think of this?
It's just
the kind of guy I am.
I'm a Great Dane.
We sat at the foot
of kings!
(JEZEBEL CHUCKLES)
Listen, I just wanted
to say something.
I wanted to say...
(CAR HORN HONKING)
My bad.
I slipped off the seat.
That's okay, Thunder.
(LAUGHS) He's so funny.
I wanted to say
hanging out with you
these last few weeks,
which in dog years
feels like months,
it's like the first time
in my life I feel like
I really belong.
Yeah! I'm having
a great time, too.
RAISIN: Look at him.
Land shrimps at
his beck and call.
(SIGHS) That's it.
No, Mazie!
Stay, please.
(BARKING)
Sit!
Yes, ma'am.
Yes, ma'am.
Hey, Mazie!
What's up?
You don't give a steaming
pile about us anymore,
so cut the act, all right?
We took you in.
We were your friends.
And you just sit over here
and act like we're dirt.
What'd they put
in your kibble
this morning?
You took her
on my dream date.
Dream date?
What is she
talking about?
How do you think
that makes me feel?
(DOGS EXCLAIMING)
(CLEARS THROAT)
Bitter, party of one?
(DOGS LAUGHING)
(MAZIE WHINES)
What's the big deal?
We were just
spit-balling ideas.
You'd think she'd be
thrilled I used one.
You don't get it,
do you?
She gave you Pig Cow,
she likes you.
At least, she did
until you turned
your back on us
and became a big
phony-baloney sell-out.
Word.
That's really cute
and everything,
but I already
have a girlfriend.
A pedigree girlfriend.
So, that's it?
(STAMMERING) Yeah.
I don't hang out
with mutts anymore.
(WHISTLE BLOWING)
Ouch!
DON: You're lucky
I had a favor to call in.
PETCO's gonna give us
another chance.
But they wanna see
a fully realized campaign
before they'll
cross-promote
the roll-out.
No problem,
I'll start working
on that immediately.
You'll start
working on it?
Little late for you
to be going solo,
there, Buckeye.
I want you on my
boat this weekend,
we'll work together.
This weekend,
I can't.
You have to.
I need to spend
some quality time
with my family.
Tough.
I promised my wife.
(SIGHS)
All right, bring the
family along. They can
relax while we work.
Okay, that'll be perfect.
Excellent.
(EXHALES)
Now, this is
sort of embarrassing,
but there are no dogs
allowed on the boat.
It's my wife's rule.
Quite frankly,
I think she's jealous.
Okay, we got the
life jacket, towels,
bathing suits,
sunglasses, sunscreen.
Brian's got his fins.
You're taking
the laptop?
You know,
just in case.
Guys, I'm really
excited about spending
this weekend together.
Dad, please,
I'm begging you.
Let me go
to my friend's house
so I can go the party.
Barb, it's a family trip
and you are coming, too.
Let's go.
Here, get your snorkel.
Let's go, let's go.
Come on. I feel like
we're forgetting something.
We have everything,
but the furniture
and the dog.
Look at him.
He's just sitting there!
I know.
You think he'll be
okay here alone?
I think he'll be fine.
He's got food and water
and I'm having Laura
from down the street
look in on him.
Right. Right.
I mean, what's the
worst that can happen?
He has a party?
Invites his
girlfriend over?
Yes and yes!
(FIRE BURNING PLAYING)
MALE DOG:
Party at the Duke's!
Rager, man! Yeah!
DOGS: (CHANTING)
Jump! Jump! Jump!
I am a golden dog!
Canine-ball!
(DOGS CHEERING)
(DOGS WHOOPING)
Looking good, Colby!
Sweet collar, Aurora!
Yes! Yes!
My boy, Topaz!
JEZEBEL: Marmaduke.
LIGHTNING:
Chug it! Chug it!
Go, go, go!
Chug it, Shasta!
SHASTA: Ow!
Sorry, slipped off
the seat again!
SHASTA: That is
not cool, dude!
Hey, is this
your party, dude?
(LAUGHS) Yeah!
We're not worthy,
we're not worthy!
We love you, man!
All right!
Now it's a party!
Yeah, come on!
Who let the dogs out?
Pee-Wee,
hit the Crazy String!
(POP MUSIC PLAYING)
You're a big hit,
Marmaduke!
Hey, is it just me,
or is it getting
a little out of hand?
Everyone's having fun,
loosen up!
(GLASS SHATTERING)
MARMADUKE: Yeah!
Of course, of course!
No, no, you're right.
Forget what I said.
Why is everyone
always having
more fun than us?
GIUSEPPE: Because
they're not afraid
to live?
And we suck at swimming?
(SNEEZES)
Great! Okay, now
I'm catching a cold.
MAZIE: Come on, let's go.
(SNIFFING)
RAISIN: What do
you smell, girl?
Trouble.
DOGS: (CHANTING)
Duke! Duke! Duke!
CARLOS: Hey, dude,
get out of the trash!
Do I know you
from somewhere?
Me? Nope.
Never seen you before.
BOSCO: You sure?
That tail looks painful.
Of course I'm sure, man.
I've never even been
to a dog park.
Oops.
It's so soothing!
Gordie, no!
No, not on Debbie's rug!
Whoa, whoa!
No, no! Hey!
Not on the couch!
You raised in a barn?
(MUSIC STOPS)
No, not the stereo!
Phil's gonna k*ll me!
Looks like a great party.
Now, I'm sorry to interrupt.
What are you doing here?
I got a quick question.
Anyone recognize
this cute little fella?
The cat from the park
that Marmaduke hazed?
(CARLOS GREETING IN SPANISH)
I recommend the guacamole.
It's dynamite.
Look at the tail.
Turns out he lives
here with Marmaduke.
Or is it Marma-fake?
(DOGS MURMURING)
First of all, you weren't
invited here, Bosco.
Leave now and you
won't have a problem.
And take Whiskers with you.
We have
a "no cat" policy.
Say what?
Is that right?
Then how do you explain
that picture over there?
THUNDER:
Hey, it is that cat.
LIGHTNING:
Yep, that's it.
That's the cat.
DOG 1: Let's
get out of here.
MARMADUKE: Wait! Wait!
What's going on?
Where you going?
No, no, stay!
DOG 2: Total poser.
Where are you going?
DOG 3: Loser!
He's going, not us!
DOG 4: Party at the pier!
All right, let's go! Party!
Is it true, Marmaduke?
(SIGHS)
Only most of it.
You see, in the end,
pedigrees always win.
And that's the way
it'll always be.
Enjoy the rest of
your party, mutt.
Baby, come on.
Jezebel! He's a liar.
Come on, let's go.
THUNDER: Hey, Bosco,
wait up!
Jezebel, wait! I...
I thought
you were different.
What just happened?
I think it's called
a colossal fall
from grace, hermano.
Oh!
CARLOS: Not to rub
margarita salt
in the wound,
but you kind of
deserved it.
(WHINES)
Oh! What have I done?
(SNORING)
Can't wait for the
next family boat trip.
It was a weekend
on a boat, okay?
It was a work-end, honey.
We had to finish
the presentation and...
BARBARA: What happened?
Marmaduke?
PHIL: No.
DEBBIE: Phil.
No!
I'm up, I'm up.
Where am I?
Marmaduke!
I'm up, I'm up.
Phil, thank God
you're here.
(STAMMERS)
I had a party.
I was trying to
be a big sh*t...
Off the couch!
I just invited
some friends
and then they
invited friends.
It just got crazy!
Come here, now!
I'm sorry.
Phil, I really could
use a hug right now.
Bad dog!
Phil, no! Phil,
I'm trying to explain!
Phil, stop it.
Just give me
a chance to...
Phil, I said I was sorry.
The PETCO pitch.
Oh, Marmaduke.
(SIGHS)
Ooh!
Uh-oh, Daddy.
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
I don't care if it's
raining, I'm done.
He can sleep outside.
Perfect, that will
solve everything.
We'll just leave him
chained up in the backyard
for the next 10 years.
Or maybe
we give him away.
You did not
just say that.
He refuses to
listen to me!
It's just an option
we haven't explored yet,
that's all I'm saying.
I don't understand
you sometimes.
Look around you, Deb.
He destroyed our home!
No, he didn't!
Our home is us.
It's you and me
and the kids.
It doesn't matter
where we are.
This move did not
work out the way
I hoped it would.
DEBBIE: The only way
this move was ever
gonna work out
is if we were
in it together.
You seem to have
lost sight of that.
Everything I do
is for us.
I worked my butt
off this weekend,
and once again,
that dog screwed it up!
He's a dog, Phil!
He doesn't know
any better.
You want him to
sleep outside, fine.
He has a backyard,
you have a couch.
Really?
Really.
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
(SIGHS HOPELESSLY)
You know what?
It's not that easy.
(GRUNTING) Nobody ever
puts in a cat door!
(TOY COW OINKS)
Hey, you must be Mazie.
Tell the hipster giant
I'm not interested
in his peace offering.
He's gone.
He got busted with Phil
and had to sleep outside.
He ran out the back gate
about an hour ago.
Oh, great. He has
zero street smarts.
Where you going?
To find that big doofus!
I'd go myself,
but I can't get wet.
ARLISS ON TV: Yeller.
Oh! You crazy,
wonderful dog.
He acts like it's
a great big romp,
doesn't he, Travis?
Crazy as a bullbat.
He's a heap more dog
than I ever had him
figured for.
None of the strays
at the pound
have seen him.
He's not at
the dog park either.
GIUSEPPE: No luck here.
I made a huge mistake
wearing the bumble-bee
sweater.
It's way too absorbent!
(GIUSEPPE HOWLING)
It's raining cats and us!
You guys head home,
I'm gonna look
a little longer.
We can't leave you
out here alone!
It's too dangerous!
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
(GIUSEPPE YELPING)
Okay, on second thought,
you have fun.
You do that whole thing.
Good luck.
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
(WHIMPERS)
(TWIGS SNAPPING)
(GROWLING)
Chupadogra?
Who are you?
And what are you
doing here?
(STAMMERING)
Please don't hurt me!
You're a big boy.
Good. The small ones
ain't got enough meat
on their bones.
(GROWLS LOUDLY)
Please don't hurt me!
I'm sorry, I...
(COUGHING)
Are you okay?
I'm more than all right.
(CONTINUES COUGHING)
Sorry to bother you.
Hey, what's a dog
like you doing out here,
anyways?
You're no stray.
I ran away from home.
So, you think
running's the
answer? Huh?
(SIGHS)
I don't even know
what I'm doing anymore.
I acted like a big-sh*t
and lost all my friends,
my family.
Listen, this bag of bones
you're looking at used
to be something special.
I was the alpha dog.
Left my home
to go run the pack.
And man, did I run it.
Till they turned on me.
Now I live out here
alone dodging trains
and dogcatchers.
Rest assured, compadre,
there ain't a day goes by
when I don't think about
waking up in a warm bed
and spending the day
with the folks who love me.
The real me.
Go home.
Something tells me
it ain't too late
for the real you.
Thank you, Buster.
(SIGHS) Been a long time
since anybody called me that.
Thanks.
(CAR DOOR CLOSING)
What's that?
It's the pound.
Go on, get out of here.
Get! (COUGHING)
What about you?
You're sick!
Yeah, that's right, baby.
I'm one sick puppy. (BARKS)
Go on, go!
Let's make this easy,
old timer.
What fun would that be?
(GROWLING)
No, no! No!
(BARKING)
(CARLOS MEOWS)
Debbie, you got
to listen to me.
Marmaduke is missing.
He's been gone
since last night!
We're talkative
this morning!
Go eat your num-nums.
(CARLOS SQUEALS)
Hey, Deb.
Did you leave these
on the table in there?
What are you
talking about?
Barb, I read the text. And...
Is that really
how you feel?
Honestly?
Yeah.
Hey, Bri.
You never went to
soccer practice,
did you?
I didn't want to
disappoint you, but you
weren't really listening.
Where's Marmaduke?
PHIL: In the backyard,
sweetie.
No, he's not.
I thought he was
upstairs with you.
No.
DEBBIE: Marmaduke!
PHIL: Marmaduke!
The side gate's open.
You didn't let him
back in last night?
No.
That's what
I've been saying.
He'll be back, right?
He could get
hit by a car.
Honey, anything
could happen
because we don't know
how long he's been gone.
I just wanted him to
sleep in the backyard,
I didn't want him
to run away. God!
I got this
presentation.
Guys, if I don't
nail this, I'm done.
Just go.
We'll find him.
You put her in
the car seat, and you get
Marmaduke's leash, okay?
Wait.
We'll all go find him.
Now you're
talking, amigo.
Come on, where am I?
Just give me one
little scent of home.
BRIAN: Marmaduke!
Come on, buddy.
PHIL: Marmaduke!
Come on, boy.
Marmaduke!
Okay, that was
the neighborhood.
So, where else?
The beach.
He could be
at the beach.
Okay, the beach and
maybe the dog park?
You guys, I'm texting
everybody I know.
What if he's
at the pound?
Come on, come on,
give me something
I can recognize.
One landmark,
one little scent.
(SIREN WAILING)
What do you mean,
"What does he look like?"
He's a Great Dane!
He's huge. He's twice
the size of your dog.
Come on,
give me a scent.
One more funky
little Marmaduke smell.
(PEOPLE CLAMORING)
Come on, not today!
(CAR HORNS HONKING)
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
Hi, Don.
Winslow,
where the heck are you?
You were supposed to
be here an hour ago!
I'm sorry, Don. Uh...
We still haven't
found Marmaduke
and I just don't think
I'll make it in today.
Don't worry about
coming in today,
because you're fired,
Winslow!
(PHONE BUZZING)
(SIGHS)
Mazie?
Mazie? Mazie!
What is this?
It looks like
a water main broke.
There he is!
MARMADUKE: Wait! I'm coming!
Honey! Honey!
Right there, look!
Kids, never do this.
(TIRES SQUEALING)
(CAR HORNS HONKING)
Marmaduke!
Where was he, Brian?
He was up there.
Marmaduke! Here, go wait
in the car with your mom.
Marmaduke!
(SIREN WAILING)
Mazie!
Marmaduke!
Mazie!
Where have you been?
I've been looking
all over for...
(RUMBLING)
MARMADUKE: Mazie! No!
What?
Mazie!
Marmaduke!
No, no,
don't let me fall!
Marmaduke!
Come on, let's go!
Come on, buddy!
Marmaduke, where are you?
Somebody, help! Mazie!
No! Marmaduke!
Mazie! Mazie!
Hey, Marmaduke,
come on, let's go!
Stay back.
MARMADUKE: Phil, help me!
PHIL: Get away from me!
Hey, stay back!
Geronimo!
Marmaduke, no!
That's my dog.
That's my dog
in there!
Look, that was my dog.
Can somebody help me?
Can you please help me
get him out of there?
There's a catch basin
about two blocks down.
We need
a water rescue, over.
Help!
(COUGHING)
Marmaduke!
MARMADUKE: Mazie!
Where are you, Marmaduke?
I can't do this!
Hold on.
I'm coming, Mazie!
Help me! Help me!
Somebody, help! Mazie!
Marmaduke!
Help! Help!
Help, help,
don't let me fall!
Mazie!
(MARMADUKE GRUNTS)
FIREMAN 1:
Go! Go! Go! Go!
FIREMAN 2: All right.
Get me two more guys here.
MAZIE: What are we
gonna do?
MARMADUKE:
Just hold on.
I'm gonna
figure this out.
Anything?
MARMADUKE: Wait, wait,
I think I hear someone.
Down here!
(MARMADUKE BARKING)
MARMADUKE: I think
he's gonna help us.
Yeah. We're right here.
What should we do?
I found them, over.
Come on, girl.
MAZIE: I don't think
I can make it!
Come here.
No, I can't!
FIREMAN 3: Come on, girl,
it's okay.
Listen to him.
Mazie, you can do this.
You can do it, right here.
MAZIE: I don't think
I can make it!
Come on, girl,
just jump.
MARMADUKE: Come on.
You can do it.
Good, you got it!
Take her first.
Go ahead.
Come on, it's
your turn. Jump!
Me? No. I can't do it,
I'm too big!
Come on,
you can do it!
(RUMBLING)
What's that noise?
Marmaduke, look out!
You got to come, boy.
Hurry!
MARMADUKE: You got
to be kidding me!
FIREMAN:
Come on, boy! Hurry!
MARMADUKE: Grab me!
You better grab me now!
(MARMADUKE SCREAMING)
What's happening?
FIREMAN 1: Jam it! Jam it!
FIREMAN 2:
Get him out!
FIREMAN 3:
Up, up, up!
Let's go!
FIREMAN 4:
You guys, easy.
(FIREMAN 5 COUGHING)
Easy!
FIREMAN 6:
There he is.
We got him up. Guys!
FIREMAN 4: He's out.
He's out.
Where's the other one?
Where's my dog?
FIREMAN 5:
I'm sorry.
The water was
moving too fast.
I lost him.
We're not gonna give up.
Where does this go?
The aqueduct,
it's just down there.
Go with him. Go.
(SIRENS WAILING)
Marmaduke!
(PANTING)
Marmaduke!
MARMADUKE: Phil, help!
Get me. Phil!
Marmaduke!
Help!
Get me, Phil!
Marmaduke!
Help!
Marmaduke!
I'm right here, buddy.
Grab here, Phil!
Grab on to this.
Phil! Phil,
where are you? Phil!
Phil! Phil!
(GASPING)
Thank goodness
you're okay!
Marmaduke!
Right here, come on!
I can't...
I'm too scared.
Right here.
Come on.
Oh, no!
How did it come
to this, Phil?
It started with a bath,
and now look at us.
We can do this.
I'm not gonna
let you go.
I can't do it.
I promise.
Let go,
and I'll catch you.
I love you, buddy.
Come on!
Phil, I've been
waiting since Kansas
to have you say that.
Come on, let's go!
You can do it, buddy.
Right here. Come on.
Trust me.
I trust you.
Here I come!
Atta boy, buddy.
Come on!
Right here.
Swim to me.
Let's go. Come on.
Phil, help!
Get me. Phil, get me!
PHIL: All right,
come on! I got you.
I love you, buddy.
Thank God,
you got me!
We did it! Yes!
You got me, Phil!
You got me!
You're safe, buddy.
Those aren't tears,
it's just a little water!
Good boy.
Harness coming down!
I still hate water!
(SIGHS) I know you're
not gonna understand
a word of this
but I've never been
so happy to see that big,
ugly face in my whole life.
I'm done pretending
to be a top dog.
A real top dog
looks out for his family.
And you are my family.
That's it,
I can't stand it anymore.
I'm gonna give him
the tongue.
That's a good boy!
I know, I know!
I've been on this
crew nine years.
And that, my friend,
is some pretty strong stuff.
Come on, buddy!
Honey?
Dad!
Dad!
Hey, guys!
DEBBIE: Are you okay?
SARAH: Hi, Dad.
I'm okay. I'm okay.
I'm just a little wet,
that's all.
BRIAN: Marmaduke!
Look who I found!
Marmaduke!
MARMADUKE: Oh, yeah!
Get a little Marmaduke.
Let me wrap my
paws around you!
SARAH: We missed you.
Hi, there.
SARAH: Hi!
Okay, you're all wet!
Gosh, I love you guys
so much.
This is all my fault.
I never asked
what you wanted.
I've just been
trying so hard
to make this work
that I had no idea
you were so unhappy.
I guess what I'm
trying to say is
I think we should
move back to Kansas.
What?
Move back to Kansas?
Kansas? Uh-uh.
Toto ain't going
nowhere, papi.
That's crazy talk, Dad.
BOY: Hey, Brian!
Dude, we got it all on tape.
We're putting it on YouTube!
Sweet!
It's good to
see you, Bri.
BRIAN: What are you doing?
Brian, who are
your friends?
They're just some kids
I met at the skate park.
They're pretty cool.
Hey, boys!
Hi.
Sup?
Hey, Barbara!
Hey, what's Hasselhoff
doing here?
Bodie? You came.
Yeah, I came as soon as
I got your text message.
Is everybody okay?
Yeah, everything's
much better now.
Those were some
pretty sick moves,
Mr. Winslow.
Thank you, Bodie.
No worries, Phil.
(CHUCKLES)
It's Mr. Winslow.
Yes, sir. (CHUCKLES)
What do you think, babe?
(SIGHS) I don't know.
I like it here.
I think we fit here.
We fit in the house.
We don't fit in
that company car.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
I just missed you.
Looks like we're home.
Looks like the family
landed on their feet.
There's just one more thing
I got to take care of.
Check it out.
Here goes nothing.
What the heck
is he doing?
Is he crazy?
DOGS: (CHANTING)
Fight! Fight! Fight!
Don't just stand there,
do something!
I am.
I'm standing my ground!
What's up, Marmadukey?
(LAUGHS)
You here to
exact revenge?
Actually, no, Bosco.
I'm here to thank you.
Thank me? For what?
For showing me
how wrong I was.
I don't care what
everyone thinks of me
'cause it doesn't matter
if you're big or small
or a pedigree
or a mutt.
We're all just dogs.
And that's the way
the park should be.
So I'm gonna sit down
and claim this spot
for all the dogs
who don't think
they have what it takes
to be over here.
Sup? Yeah.
You gotta be kidding me.
You're kidding me, right?
Does everyone here
have rabies-induced
insanity?
This is sacred turf.
It's just for pedigrees.
Well, not anymore.
You know what?
You're all just mutts.
All of you!
Let's go, Jezebel.
I think everyone
should sit here, too.
I'm done taking your
spit on my head, Bosco.
Go find somebody
else to drool on.
We're through with you!
Come have a seat, fellas.
It's lovely up here.
I can see forever!
Fine, have it
your way, losers.
I'll remember this.
Payback's gonna be a...
Bee! Bee! Ahhh!
(DOGS LAUGHING)
Victory!
Victory is ours!
The Duke's our boy!
Huh! Looks like
I'm not the only one
terrified of bees.
Bees are scary.
(LAUGHS)
Listen...
I don't know how to say
this without hurting
your feelings...
JEZEBEL: Shh!
I'll be fine. It's time
to finally stand on my own
four legs for a while.
Besides,
we'll still be friends.
Ouch! I hate it
when girls say that.
(LAUGHING)
(EXCLAIMS)
MARMADUKE: Mazie?
Wow.
Hey, check it out.
Looking good
in the pink.
What are you
waiting for? Go!
Mazie, wait up!
Oh, hey!
You look amazing!
I feel like
a fluffy monstrosity.
Listen, I wanted to say
how sorry I am for the way
I've been acting.
I was a real jerk,
and you didn't deserve it.
I think my brain just
turned into an Afghan
Hound for a while.
No offense.
I totally heard that.
(LAUGHS)
It takes a big dog
to admit that.
Yeah, I...
What?
Your eyes. You have
really pretty eyes.
And I never had
a chance to tell you.
(CHUCKLES)
Thanks!
(STAMMERS) Your fur's
really nice, too.
(PHIL WHISTLES)
DON: Winslow!
Oh! I wonder
what ever happened
to that PETCO deal.
Winslow! Winslow?
There you are, I've
been looking for you.
I thought I was fired.
Don't be so sensitive.
Any man that
chooses his dog
over his career
is a man I want
working for me.
Besides, have you seen
the video of you rescuing
Marmaduke on YouTube?
Nah.
Six hundred and
eighty-two thousand
hits so far.
We got PETCO!
Are you serious?
Totally!
(LAUGHS)
We're gonna sell
a lot of dog food!
Wow!
Come on, walk with me.
We got work to do.
I can't.
Why?
'Cause I made plans
with my family.
Who? Oh. All right.
All right, tomorrow.
Monday.
Monday. Deal.
Deal.
Don't push it, okay?
Okay, I'm just
spit-balling here
but what if the dogs
could talk to each other?
I don't really buy it.
What if they
could dance?
(WHAT I LIKE ABOUT YOU
PLAYING)
Hey!
What I like about you
You really know
how to dance
When you go up, down,
jump around
Think about true romance
Keep on whispering
in my ear
Tell me all the things
that I want to hear
'Cause it's true
(CARLOS GROANS)
What's up, boys?
(CHUCKLES)
That's what
I like about you.
That's what
I like about you
Hey!
Hey!
(DOGS GASPING)
That's what
I like about you.
Hey!
(TV ANNOUNCER READING)
PHIL: It's still
pretty rough.
What do you think?
DEBBIE: I love it!
Great job.
Thanks, Deb.
Wait for it.
Wait for it.
(FARTS LOUDLY)
Oh! Marmaduke!
What did you eat?
Man, you got
a serious problem.
(LAUGHS)
It never gets old!
(WHAT I LIKE ABOUT YOU
PLAYING)
Hey!
What I like about you
You keep me
warm at night
Never wanna let you go
You know you make me
feel all right
Keep on whispering
in my ear
Tell me all the things
that I want to hear
'Cause it's true
That's what
I like about you
Hey!
Marmaduke (2010)
Moderator: Maskath3