But I'm afraid
it was unavoidable.
We apologize. It seems...
Well, our dog d*ed
this morning.
(Gasps)
Doris:
yes, I know.
It leaves one speechless.
Doris, jim,
I'm so sorry.
Yes.
We're fine.
I'm really sorry.
Really, truly sorry.
Well... This is a blow.
Trickster was a...
Uh... Well, where do you
find the words?
I don't know where.
It was quite unexpected.
This morning I called
to trickster
But he didn't come,
and I finally found him
Lying up against
the clothes dryer
Peaceful and toasty-warm
With his little
hamburger squeak toy
Still in his mouth.
He loved his burger buddy.
Well, I certainly understand
how you feel.
I had a dog myself--
butterscotch.
Of course, he was
no trickster, no siree.
Thank you, murphy.
You bet.
Well, life goes on.
We have a broadcast to do.
I'll walk doris to the car
And then I'll be back
for the meeting.
If trickster were here now
to feel all this love
He'd be on his hind legs,
doing that little jig he...
Steady, dear.
Excuse me.
I can't believe it.
Trickster's gone.
Yeah. Just like that.
He's dead.
Where do you want
To have lunch?
You are cold!
Geez, you should
see yourselves.
You could all take
a lesson from jim.
You don't see him
all wrapped up in grief.
Like the man said,
"life goes on."
Everywhere I look, I'm reminded
That birth and death
walk hand-in-hand.
So, as we turn our attention
to the budding tulips
Remember also that they, too,
will soon wither, die
And once again become part
of this cold, grey planet
As it hurtles toward
its inevitable destruction.
And that's
my commentary on spring.
I'm jim dial, and for all of us
here at f.y.i....good-bye.
John:
and we're clear.
Uh... Jim, about
your commentary...
Oh, yes, I made a few
last-minute changes, miles.
I hope you didn't mind.
I found my earlier version
a bit too fluffy.
There was nothing fluffy
about that, was there, guys?
I liked it, jim.
Your slam at the easter bunny
was long overdue.
So, last one to phil's
is a rotten egg.
Thanks for the invitation
but not tonight.
Jim, we always go out
after the show.
Oh, I don't think so.
Are you okay?
Never better.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have to take this makeup off.
I feel like I'm wearing
a death mask.
I'm really worried
about jim.
Do you think this
has anything to do
With trickster being..?
What? Dead, stiff,
doing the dirt dance?
It's been a week.
Don't worry about jim.
He's fine.
Fine? He's fine?
People are
putting on their easter bonnets
And walking into traffic.
Corky:
miles is right.
At first I thought
he was out of sorts
But that part
about the red, red robin
Going bob-bob-bobbin'
into his windshield?
Okay, so the man makes one
Slightly overdramatic
commentary.
Big deal.
It's obvious--
jim is repressing
His feelings of sadness
and abandonment
About trickster dying
And they're starting to surface
in subconscious ways.
And maybe his shoes are
just too tight, dr. Freud.
I understand why
you're defending jim.
Both you and jim have difficulty
expressing emotions.
It's just a dog,
and not even a good dog.
You want to talk
about a good dog
Let's talk about butter...
Enough with butternut
or buttersquash
Or butterball already!
I am sick and tired
of hearing about
You and that damn...
Butter Kn*fe.
His name was butterscotch.
I'm going to stay
and talk to jim.
Oh, frank...
Now go to phil's,
get us a table.
And don't worry--
I know what I'm doing.
Swell. Last time frank
said that to me was in maui
Right before he tried
to pet that eel.
Oh, still here, frank?
Yeah.
I wanted to talk
to you for a sec.
Jim, sometimes in life
Something happens that we're
not equipped to deal with.
Frank, are you having
tax problems again?
Well... Yeah,
but this isn't about me.
Jim, sometimes we
can lose something
We care very deeply about...
The dog was buried
a week ago.
I'm completely over it.
Doris called me.
She said you're
not sleeping
You're walking
the halls all night...
My wife telling my friends
private information about me.
Doris wears panty hose
With the extra-support
tummy panel.
There, we're even.
Okay. There is no easy way
to say this, so...
I thought you might like
to go and see my therapist.
Oh... That's rich!
Frank, we're talking
about a dog.
Yes, it was sad,
but the dog is gone
And I'm over it.
And even if
I weren't
We dials do not see therapists.
My aunt was mad as a hatter
But she knew her place--
up in the attic until sundown.
That's our family way.
Here is the number
In case you want
someone to talk to.
It's totally between you
and my therapist.
No one here has to know
we even had this conversation.
We never did.
Guys, have
a good week.
Oh, and by the way, jim
The sound booth
voted three to one
That you should talk
to frank's shrink.
Hello. I'm lee larkin,
and you are..?
Jim dial?
All right.
I mean, yes.
I'm sorry.
I'm a little thrown.
You're not quite
what I expected.
In what way?
Frank never said
you were a woman.
Did he ever mention to you
that I was a man?
You are? Oh!
I mean, he never mentioned it
one way or the other--
Not that I can think of.
It's interesting
you would assume I was a man.
Why do you think that?
Listen here,
you just slow down now.
I'm going to need some time
Before you jump right
into the main course.
Certainly.
Make yourself comfortable.
Ah... The infamous couch,
I presume.
If you like.
Nope! Nope! Sorry.
No can do.
I lie on that couch
You swing a watch
Then every time a bell rings,
I'm walking like a duck.
You went to the trouble
To come down here
to see me.
You must have thought
I could help.
Really, I'm fine.
Thank you for your time.
Wait, mr. Dial.
At least let me
validate your parking.
And I'm also going
to give you
One of my cards.
Any time you
change your mind...
I see you have a dog.
Oh, yes.
That's lady.
She's my pride and joy.
She's a fine-looking animal--
shetland.
She'll be
six years old this june.
Are you a dog lover?
Actually, yes, I am... Was.
My dog... He recently d*ed.
Last week.
Thursday... Morning.
Well, that must be hard.
I don't know what I'd do
without my lady.
I guess I'm just one
of those dog people.
My wife doris says
the same thing about me.
When we were vacationing
at yosemite
She kidded me
about being more excited
At showing the redwoods
to the dog
Than to her.
We'd been driving
for some time.
In yosemite,
they have those vista points...
Frank:
you have to give it
a little time.
Maybe you have
years to waste
But I don't.
I don't wish to discuss it.
Oh, geez, it's true.
Jim, you went
to frank's therapist.
I didn't tell her.
The sound booth guys told me.
I heard it
From the shoeshine man
who heard from maury povich.
Tonight on
a current affair
"Jim dial's headed
for the loony bin."
What did the therapist
say about trickster?
She said the reason
I hadn't been sleeping well
Is that I haven't grieved
over the loss of my dog.
She suggested I surround myself
with memories of the dog
To trigger my... Dog grief.
So last night
I went out and stood
by his favorite tree.
Nothing.
I filled his water dish--
nothing.
This morning
I walked out of the house
with this--
His burger buddy.
(Squeaking)
And at last,
I felt something.
Oh, jim.
Yes.
I felt like
a complete moron
And I paid $
for the privilege.
Wait. She
charges me .
Well!
You know
Maybe you should do
what we did
When one
of our pets d*ed.
Oh, no,
not the barbecue story again.
No, murphy,
that was a pig, not a pet.
We're talking about burr,
our dog.
When he d*ed,
mama got us together.
We dug a hole
in the backyard.
We decorated
his blanket with flowers
Covered him with dirt,
and had a good cry.
That's not the way you handle
a dead dog situation.
You do what my mother did.
I came home from school
And asked where
butterscotch was.
She said he ran off
to join the dog circus.
No fuss, no muss.
Oh, murphy.
Get away.
I'm telling you--
Jim had
the right idea.
Life goes on
But you two keep saying,
"oh, it's so sad."
That would make anyone
cranky and irritable.
If you ask me,
the fault lies in peer pressure
Pure and simple.
I think we all know
that's why kids smoke.
You know,
murphy is absolutely right.
I'm not depressed
or repressed.
There's nothing wrong with me
that wouldn't be cured
By a good night's sleep--
end of story.
Empty again?!
Judas priest! Am I working
with a herd of camels?!
Poor jim. We've got
to do something to help him.
And murphy's useless.
What are we going
to do, frank?
(Disguised voice:)
I was wondering--
How much do you charge
for a therapy session?
Frank fontana?
I don't know.
Who is this
frank fontana?
(Regular voice:)
all right.
We'll talk about it tuesday.
This was a good idea
All of us
getting together
To have a memorial service
for trickster.
Any sign of jim?
No.
I hope he'll
be okay with this.
Maybe we should have
asked him first.
We're doing
an intervention, miles
To force jim
to deal with his grief.
If you told him first,
he'd never show up.
This way, we catch jim
by surprise
And force him to dive
into that horrifying abyss
Where he buries
his most frightening feelings.
Are we good friends
or what?
I made some photo pins
of the deceased
From some old pictures
doris gave me.
With any luck at all,
this will break jim's heart.
You take the one of trickster
wearing a bow tie and kilt
You take the one
Of trickster
at the grand canyon.
I want the one of trickster
and jim in bed.
Avery finally fell asleep
But not before breaking
another statue thing.
Doris didn't realize
A nine-month-old
was coming?
This stupid dog funeral's
going to cost me a fortune.
Murphy,
it's not a funeral.
It's a memorial service.
Now here,
put this on.
Oh, god, a picture
of jim and trickster
Playing scrabble.
Gee, I wonder who put down
the word "woof".
The scalloped potatoes
should be warm
When you're ready to eat.
It's spectacular of you
To drive all this way
to cater this affair.
I know wherever
trickster is now
He's looking down and thinking,
"save a bone for me, phil."
You never had
any kids, did you?
Okay, listen up.
There's more coffee
just about ready
But the main eats are off limits
until after the, uh, thing.
I got a whole lot
of food.
Plan to take a doggie bag
home with you.
Sorry about that.
Okay, jim's here.
Oh boy. Should we all hide,
jump out, and yell funeral?
Murphy!
During the memorial service
I'll ask each of you to share
A fond memory of trickster.
Whatever's in your heart.
Murphy, I've written
yours for you.
Doris, I don't want
you buying me
Any more bikini briefs.
Every time
I took a backswing
My shorts rode
halfway up my...
My, my.
We have company.
Your friends
have come over, jim
Because they're
a little concerned.
Concerned about what?
What's that thing
pinned to your...
That's a picture of...
And you're all
wearing them?
We're having a memorial service
for trickster.
It's called
an intervention, jim.
An act of love
By your friends
To help you face the grief
about your dog.
Don't be threatened.
Don't be afraid...
Don't let the door
Hit you
on your way out.
We're not going
anywhere, jim.
Fine, then I will.
Jim, I have had it
with the sleepless nights
The hall walking,
the irritability.
Now if your very dear friends
And a competent
psychoanalyst
Say do this, then do it--
If not for your sanity,
then for mine.
Now, sit!
Jim, I just want you to know,
the only reason I'm here
Is because frank told me
we were going to dairy queen.
Friends and family
Lovers of trickster,
the happy scottish terrier
If you'll all take your seats,
we are about to begin.
We are here today
To celebrate a wonderful,
wonderful dog--
Trickster dial.
Feel anything yet, jim?
(Squeaking)
Anything?
Nothing.
Okay.
"Born to blue ribbon
champions
"Silky gray and earl divine.
"His official title name,
lord raymond
"Was changed to trickster
when as a mere pup
Doris found him hiding
in jim's bedroom slipper."
Remember what
you said then, jim?
No.
You said, and I quote
"Oh, that dog
is such a trickster."
Remember that, jim?
No.
(Squeaking)
And now frank would like
to say a few words.
Frank?
Yes, um...
(Playing "loch lomond")
What I remember most
Is sometimes when I'd be over
and feeling depressed
Somehow trickster
would sense that
And come on over and lick
my hand until I felt better.
It's a miracle the dog
had any tongue left.
Thank you, frank.
That was lovely.
Miles
A memory?
Make it sad.
(Playing "loch lomond")
Uh...
Remember when you took trickster
to get those sh*ts, jim?
You told me about it,
remember?
That was sad.
sh*ts.
Ouch.
Big needle
Little body.
(Imitating dog whimpering)
Poor trickster.
And now murphy would like
to read for you a tribute
In honor of
your scottish terrier.
Murphy?
What?
The card-- read it for jim.
What the hell is this?
It's a poem.
Look at that face.
Do it.
"Trickster, ye are gone now
"No more chasin'
o' the squirrels.
"No more pattin' o' the tum now
"You're off to different worlds.
"We run the fields together
"I pat ye on your head
"For your doggie's
always with you
Bein' he alive or dead."
But he is dead.
My doggie's dead.
Oh, butterscotch!
There's no such thing
As a dog circus.
Murphy, what do you think
you're doing?
You come home from school
Ready to play sergeant o'hara
and rin tin tin.
All they say is, "he ran off
to join the dog circus.
Go do your homework."
Real nice!
Stop it!
This is about my dog--
My trickster.
It's the first time I've said
his name since he d*ed.
Trickster.
I miss my trickster.
Oh, jim, honey.
Cocoa.
He was my puppy.
He got distemper.
They had to put him
to sleep.
Whitey.
My hamster.
Mr. Puffy.
He's not dead,
but he will be someday.
Oh, look at us.
This is stupid.
Grown people crying
over dead animals.
But they're not
just animals, murphy.
Pets are unconditional love.
Who else is always
there for you
Running to the door to meet
you when you get home?
The way they lick your face
and sit in your lap.
They run with you
and play catch for hours.
They spin around
on their little exercise wheel.
Dear lord, who would
have thought it.
Five minutes of acting
like an idiot
And I'm starting
To feel better.
♪♪
♪♪ There was a farmer had a dog
♪♪
♪♪ And bingo was his name-o
♪♪ B-i-n-g-o ♪♪
♪♪ B-i-n-g-o ♪♪
♪♪ B-i-n-g-o ♪♪
♪♪ And butterscotch
was his name-o. ♪♪