01x12 - Fa-La-La-La-La-La-La-Lay-Lay

[bunniefuu]

[singers] ♪ Hey ♪

[festive hip-hop music plays]

Tree is looking pretty dope, huh?

Mm, it's missing one thing,
a little Lay Lay bling.

-Oh.
-[both] Bars!

-[Sadie laughs]
-All right.

Ha! Now this tree is poppin'.

You got good taste, tree. Boop.

Attention, everyone.

Make way for Marky's
Magnificent Gingerbread House.

Whew. I'm glad this is over.

We've picked out eight
different lollipop sconces.

Ten. I ate two of them.

It had to be perfect.

This is an exact replica of my future home

in Oak Bluffs on Martha's Vineyard.

Dang. This is where you're gonna live?

I want a house you can eat.

Hey!

It's time to hang our stockings.

-Yay.
-Yay.

-All right, you go first.
-All right.

Y'all ain't got nothing on my stockings!

[indistinct chatter]

Okay. All right. Let's see how it looks.

[Lay Lay] Ha!

Now, that's what you call
a Christmas stocking, baby!

Is that a stocking or a sleeping bag?

Hey, the bigger the stocking,
the more room for presents.

All right. Lay Lay, around here,

the Christmas spirit is more
about giving than getting.

Is he for real?

'Cause that sound like crazy talk.

There is nothing crazy
about giving back, Lay Lay.

That's why we're gonna volunteer
at the gift drive later.

Last year, I gave
this little girl my roller skates

from when I was a kid.

Making that girl's Christmas wish
come true felt amazing.

She broke her arm skating,
but that's not on me.

Oh. I want to make someone's
Christmas wish come true

without a trip to the hospital.

You're dangerous.

All right, everyone, it's time for Mama
to make this tree shine.

Yay! My mom always puts
the star on top of the tree.

Because it's not safe for you kids
on top of this la--

Whoa!

Hang on, honey!

[screaming]

Whoa!

This is the best Christmas tradition yet!

I'm riding the tree next.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
This is not a tradition.

It's a potential concussion.

Eh, your dad looks like
he has this under control.

-Seriously?
-Yeah.

We have very different definitions
of "under control."

-[Trish] Whoa!
-[Bryce] I got you!

[Trish panting]

Nice catch, baby.

♪ ♪

I was always feel a little bad biting off
the poor gingerbread man's head.

Oh, not gonna lie. I'm into it.

Ho, ho, ho, Alexanders.

I just finished wrapping
your Christmas present.

Guess what it is.

A hat rack, Jeremy.

Man, I should have used
different colored paper.

I--

Did you wrap this?

The precision. The detail.

I never thought I'd say this to you,
but you got talent.

I've got wicked origami skills.

Somehow it translates to gift wrapping.

That's not all it translates to.

Uh-oh, there's
that "time to get paid" face.

That's right, Mom.

The ca-ching-le bells are chiming.

-I don't hear them.
-You will.

There's going to be a big crowd
at that gift drive.

You and I are going to wrap some gifts
and make some money!

Come on, Jeremy.

It's time to put
your strange talent to work,

'cause we're about to get a visit
from the Ghost of Christmas Cash.

♪ ♪

[both] ♪ Deck the halls
With boughs of holly ♪

♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

[applause]

Merry Christmas Eve, Cleveland.

Ho, ho, ho!

Now, come on over and tell
Santa and Mrs. Claus

what you want for Christmas.

But remember, clean up after yourselves.

Santa's not the only one
making a list and checking it twice.

Your parents are gonna make
so many Christmas wishes come true.

I'm gonna have to step up my game.

[with goofy voice]
'Tis the season, my fellow elf.

Come on! Let's help!

Why are you talking like that?

This is my elf voice! You try.

Nah, I don't speak elf.
That's all you, boo.

Okey dokey. Have it your way.

[Bryce] Ho, ho, ho!

Merry Christmas,
and enjoy your guitar, young lady.

Aw, she looks so happy.

[with normal voice]
Well, her Christmas wish came true.

Okay, who's next?

Ho, ho, ho. Hello, young lady!

What's your name,
and what would you like for Christmas?

I'm Brandy, and I want a guitar too!

Oh, I'm sorry.
We just gave away our last guitar.

Is there anything else you want?

Nope, just a guitar.

Oh. Well, I am so sorry,

but I bet you'll like this instead.

-Okay. Thanks, Santa.
-Okay.

That's not fair.
She didn't get her Christmas wish.

Yeah. Well, hey, maybe someone else
will make it come true.

[with goofy voice]
Right this way, little boy.

This is Santa and Mrs. Claus!

Well, thank you, Santa's helper.

Dial back the elf voice.
You're freaking out the kids.

Hmm, there's a guitar here

and a kid who wants a guitar there.

Seems like the perfect
Christmas spirit moment to me.

Hey, Brandy, us elves
did a rush job to get you this.

Merry Christmas!

[glass shatters]

Thank you so much.

My mom is taking me
to BoomBox Burger for lunch.

I'm bringing this! You're the best!

Wow, when it comes
to being good, I am good.

♪ ♪

Where could you be? Where could it be?

I just had it in my hands.

[with normal voice]
Dad, what are you doing?

I'm freaking out.

I can't find my guitar, Old Saint Riff.

You gave your guitar a name?

Well, it's his favorite.

Yeah, my father gave it to me
for Christmas when I was a kid,

and I was just playing it
at the gift drive,

so where could it have gone?

That guitar is special to you?

Well, he plays it on Christmas Day,
and we all sing carols.

And now I don't know where it is.

Have you found Old Saint Riff?

[angrily]
Does it look like I found Old Saint Riff?

You want to try that again?

[calmly] I'm sorry, honey. No.

I did not find my beloved guitar.

That's better.

Well, can't you play
a different guitar to sing carols?

I can't play a different guitar.

It's disrespectful to Old Saint Riff!

The thought makes me sad, and…

I don't want to be sad on Christmas, so…

no carols.

So what are we gonna do,
just not sing Christmas carols?

That's exactly what we're gonna do.

No songs… or joy.

Okay. Calm down.

We just need to find it
by tomorrow morning.

-Let's keep looking.
-Okay.

Right after I write a letter to Santa
asking him to bring my guitar back.

I'll send him an email.

Sadie,

you know how at the gift drive,
Brandy wanted a guitar

but we didn't have one to give her?

Oh, no, you've got that,
"I'm an avatar from the phone

who's new to this world,"
tone in your voice.

So I gave Mr. A's guitar to Brandy.

I just wanted to make
her Christmas wish come true.

Oh, man, now we've got to get it back
to make my dad's Christmas wish come true.

[inhales sharply]

Just because I can't see you
doesn't mean you're off the hook.

[Lay Lay exhales heavily]

I just don't like that disappointed look
you're giving me.

[inhales sharply]

You may be invisible,
but I'm still looking at you.

♪ I'm Sadie's affirmation app ♪

♪ And so no matter what happens
I got her back ♪

♪ 'Cause, see, my homey Sadie
Wished on a star ♪

♪ She said, "I wish you were real" ♪

♪ Now I'm as real as you are ♪

♪ And now who's coming out the app? ♪

♪ That girl Lay Lay ♪

♪ Whose avatar power is to freeze? ♪

-♪ That girl Lay Lay ♪
-♪ All day, all day ♪

♪ It's your girl ♪

♪ That girl, that girl, that girl ♪

♪ That girl Lay Lay ♪

♪ ♪

Okay, we've got to get
that guitar back from Brandy.

She still thinks we're elves,
so let's use that, right?

Are you gonna do that dumb voice?

[with goofy voice] Yes, indeedy.

Oh, love the outfits, ladies,

but I only give discounts to Santa.

Elves pay full price.

Oh, there she is.

Look at her happy little face.

Time to get our Grinch on
and ruin her Christmas.

[Sadie with normal voice] Okay.

[with goofy voice]
Merry Christmas, little girl!

What up, Brandy?

Wow, you're the pretty elf
who gave me this guitar.

Aw. You think I'm pretty.

I mean… [clears throat]
…we need to talk.

Santa's upset because
we accidentally gave you

his special guitar.

And he sent us to come get it from you.

Sounds like a you problem,
not a me problem.

Well, the man in the red suit
said if we don't come back

with that guitar,
we're gonna lose our jobs.

Oh, no.

Two incompetent elves
will lose their jobs?

Whatever will I do?

[with normal voice] Say what, now?

This is mine,

and I'm never giving it back, so scram!

Oh, Principal Willingham.

Brandy, how exciting.

You have visitors from the North Pole.

Are you bothering my daughter?

Brandy is your daughter?

Mom, these wannabe elves
are trying to take my guitar,

and this one's not even
doing an elf voice.

[with goofy voice] See, there's been
a mix-up, and Santa needs his--

You should be ashamed of yourselves,

trying to take a present
from my sweet little girl.

[scoffs] Come on, Brandy,
let's get out of here

before they try to take
my fancy Christmas socks too.

Well, that didn't go as planned.

[with normal voice]
That's because you didn't do the voice.

♪ ♪

[bell ringing]

Come one, come all.

Come witness the greatest gift wrapper
this side of Cleveland.

Look at this line, Marky. You were right!

These people are hungry
for my amazing talents.

And I'm hungry for money,

so quit yapping and start wrapping.

Huh, pointy,

oddly shaped.

No problem.

A-kapow!

Pay my associate. Next!

A Christmas cactus?

This is a gift wrapper's nightmare.

I love it!

A-kapow! Merry Christmas.

Pay the little dude in the sweater vest.

-Thank you.
-[sighs]

Jeremy, you're incredible.

You're like the Jay-Z of wrapping.

[scoffs] Jay-Z is the Jay-Z of rapping.

I meant gift wrapping, Woody.

Oh, he's probably better at that
than Jeremy too.

You know Beyoncé ain't accepting
no badly wrapped gifts.

Is the beanbag for Beyoncé?

She's my Secret Santa!

What?

No, just wrap the beanbag, man.

♪ ♪

[Sadie sighs]

We didn't save Christmas,

and my dad's not gonna get
his Christmas wish.

I know. My pa-rum has left my pum-pum.

Well, I looked in the attic
for Old Saint Riff.

All I found was more disappointment.

You know, I--I think someone
accidentally wrapped it,

so I'm gonna unwrap all these presents.

Dad, stop. A guitar can't fit in that box.

And my broken heart can't fit
inside my body, Sadie,

but here we are!

[panting] I found it!

♪ Who saved Christmas? It was Trish ♪

♪ Who saved Christmas?
Bryce got his wish ♪

Ha!

This isn't Old Saint Riff.

This is just one of my regular guitars.

So you're telling me you have
two acoustic red guitars?

[angrily]
You have two pair of red-bottom shoes!

Okay, Bryce, I done told you
about that tone.

[calmly] Okay.

Oh, we haven't checked
under the house, huh?

Daddy's coming for you, Old Saint Riff!

Whoo, this man.

We have to do something.

Brandy's not gonna give us
that guitar back.

We're out of options.

Not necessarily.

We could sneak into her house

and replace the guitar with this one.

Are you seriously suggesting
that we break into our principal's house

and take her daughter's Christmas present

just to make my dad's
Christmas wish come true?

That's a great idea.

Okay, come on.
We've got a chimney to drop down.

Hey, hey, hey, uh-uh, we are not
dropping down a chimney.

That is so dangerous.

-Santa does it!
-Santa is magical.

Uh, excuse me?

So am I.

♪ ♪

[sighs] Here you go.

You brought me a regular box to wrap?

Do you know who I am?
Honestly, this is an insult to my talents.

I think what my associate
is trying to say is,

thank you for your business
and please come again next year.

Now pay me.

I can't work like this, Marky.

I'm uninspired. I'm taking a break.

A break? Do you see this line?

You can't take a break.

You can't rush art, Marky.

Did the Pope tell Michelangelo "faster"
when he was painting the Sistine Chapel?

Why are we talking about ninja turtles?
I want my money!

Well, you can't do it without me
and these moneymakers,

and we're taking a break.

You think you're the only one
that can wrap a gift?

I don't need you. I can wrap anything.

Uh-oh.

[Tchaikovsky's
"Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy" playing]

♪ ♪

Whoa!

♪ ♪

I'm okay.

♪ ♪

Lay Lay, where'd you go?

[Lay Lay] Oh!

Ow. I landed on my jingle bell.

I told you the chimney was a bad idea.

Bad? Yes.

Worth it? Also yes.

You ready to find that guitar
and swap it out with this one?

-Girl, you know-ho-ho it.
-Okay.

[festive hip-hop music plays]

♪ ♪

-Was it in the garage?
-No.

The only thing I found in the garage
was your snorkeling gear.

Who snorkels in Cleveland?

Trish, we got to look everywhere
for Old Saint Riff.

We have looked everywhere.

Not everywhere.

I need to search your closet.

Well, go ahead and search my closet.

No.

Your secret wig closet.

[sternly] Don't you dare go in my closet.

You want to try that again?

[forcefully]
Don't you dare go in my closet!

-I'm going.
-[shrieks]

You are a bad Santa! Bad Santa!

♪ ♪

Sorry for the wait. Woody, here you go.

What in the Kris Kringle?

This is not the same wrap job
I had earlier.

The service around here
has fallen way off.

[customers] Yeah!

Say you need me. Say you need me.

Say you need me. Say you need me!

-I don't need you!
-I want my money back!

I need you!

Okay, okay. Whoa!

Okay, everyone, calm down.

The wrap artist is back,
and I can wrap anything.

Anything?

Anything. Try me.

Jeremy, you got problems,
but gift wrapping ain't one.

Mm-mm.

♪ ♪

Did you find it?

All I found are things that confirm

everything I ever believed
about Willingham.

I mean, look at this.
These aren't decorations.

This is a cry for help.

[Principal Willingham]
Brandy, is that you?

It's Willingham. What do we do?

[inhales sharply]

[Sadie] Did I just go invisible too?

Is it because I'm holding your hand?

[Lay Lay exhales heavily]

I can't talk when I'm holding my breath.

Now, shh. She's coming.

[inhales sharply]

[Sadie] Sweet James Brown, it works!

Is somebody there?

Huh, must've been another one
of my night terrors.

Whew, that was close.

But I have an invisibility power!

-♪ I can turn invisible ♪
-Girl, that's my invisibility.

You just borrowing it.

You're right.

Let's swap these guitars
and get out of here.

-Yeah.
-Okay.

[Principal Willingham]
I know someone's down there.

-Oh, quick. Do the thing.
-[inhales sharply]

I took a martial arts class
from the Parks Department,

so watch out!

Oof!

You do not want to get hit with these!

They really hurt.

Let's get out of here.

I don't know how fast I can
crawl up the chimney, but hey.

No, no, no, no, no.

We are not going up the chimney.

Why you always hating on my fun?

Try something new for a change. Dang!

We broke into our principal's house.
This is new.

So let's get out of here
before she sees us.

I see you!

What in the name of Good King Wenceslas?

Merry Christmas!

[with goofy voice] Surprise!

Girl, you still doing that?

Mom, these are the fake elves
from BoomBox Burger.

No, these are two students from my school

who have a lot of explaining to do.

[with normal voice]
Oh, this isn't what it looks like.

Hmm, it looks like two girls
broke into my house

in the middle of the night
dressed as elves.

Okay, yeah.
It's exactly what it looks like, yeah.

Okay, this is all a big mix-up.

At the gift drive, I just wanted to make

Brandy's Christmas wish come true,

so I gave her Sadie's dad's guitar.

But she didn't know it was his favorite.

So we came here to swap it out
for this guitar that looks just like it.

You should have offered me that
at BoomBox.

-I'll take it!
-Oh, okay.

[random guitar notes playing]

♪ ♪

Oh, you sound like such an angel, honey.

Best Christmas ever!

Thank you, fake elves.

Girls, I have one thing to say to you.

Let me guess.

We both have detention until we graduate?

No.

I'll pay you both bucks

if you come back tomorrow night
and take that guitar too.

-Yeah.
-Oh, we got you, Z Willie.

[festive hip-hop music plays]

[Trish] Time to open another gift.

This one has your name on it, Mr. A.

Thank you.

[gasps] Old Saint Riff. Hey, how did you--

Oh, it's a Christmas miracle. Yeah.

Your Christmas wish came true.

Yeah, I'll say.

Hey, what are we waiting for, huh?

It's time for Christmas carols!

My favorite Alexander
Christmas tradition of them all.

[all] ♪ Deck the halls
With boughs of holly ♪

♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

♪ 'Tis the season to be jolly ♪

♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

♪ See, we being having a ball
While we be decking the halls ♪

♪ And Bryce can play guitar songs
And I can rap along ♪

♪ Like fa-la-la-la-la-la-la
Now I'm dropping Christmas bars ♪

♪ Sadie rockin' hot beats
All night eggnog ♪

-♪ Ho ♪
-♪ Ho, ho, it's time to be jolly now ♪

♪ 'Tis the season to be holly now ♪

-♪ Yeah ♪
-♪ We're jinglin', janglin' ♪

♪ Got you singin' and sangin' ♪

Hey, Lay, send them on their merry way.

♪ Fa-la-la-la, Lay Lay ♪

[all] ♪ Ho, ho, ho, ho ♪

♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la, Lay Lay ♪

♪ Ho, ho, ho, ho ♪

♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la, Lay Lay ♪

♪ And I'm so grateful to have
My best friend, Lay Lay ♪

♪ And we're the perfect match ♪
So check our scratch ♪

♪ It's Christmastime
We're ridin' like the reindeer ♪

♪ My family's here
Get ready for the New Year ♪

♪ Yes, yes, y'all, Christmas, y'all ♪

♪ I'm a great wrapper
I can wrap a gift, y'all ♪

♪ Oh, oh, I can't flow ♪

♪ But I can say "Oh" and "Ho, ho, ho" ♪

♪ Say yo, yo, it's time for me to go ♪

♪ Right after this kiss
Under the mistletoe ♪

[kids] Ew.

[all] ♪ Deck the halls
With boughs of holly ♪

♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la, Lay Lay ♪

Merry Christmas from the Alexanders.

[laughter]