01x15 - Count Koopula/Magician

Episode transcripts for the TV series, "The Super Mario Bros. Super Show!". Aired: September 4 – December 1, 1989.*
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Revolves around Mario and Luigi, two Italian-American plumbers from Brooklyn.
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01x15 - Count Koopula/Magician

Post by bunniefuu »

Hey Paisanos!

it's the Super Mario
Brother's Super Show!

♪ We're the Mario Brothers,
and plumbing's our game, ♪

♪ we're not like the
others who get all the fame. ♪

♪ If your sink is in trouble
you can call us on the double, ♪

♪ we're faster than the
others you'll be hooked on the ♪

♪ brothers Unh! ♪

♪ H-hooked on the brothers. ♪

♪ Gimme gimme, gimme gimme. ♪

♪ Yo, you're in for a treat,
so hang on to your seat, ♪

♪ get ready for adventure
and remarkable feats. ♪

♪ You'll meet Koopas, the
Troopas the Princess and the ♪

♪ others, hanging with the
plumbers you'll be hooked on ♪

♪ the brothers. ♪

♪ To the brink! ♪

♪ Unh! ♪

♪ Unh! ♪

♪ I say h-h-h-h-hooked
on the brothers! ♪

♪ The brothers! ♪

♪ The brothers! ♪♪

[Luigi:] Look at this,
Harry Blackstone Jr.
wrote back to me!

Listen to this: "Dear Luigi,
thanks for your support,

"it's great to
have funs like you,

"ah?

"If I'm ever passing
through your neighbourhood,

"I'll stop by the say hello.

"Magically yours the
King of Illusion,

"Blackstone."

Wow Mario, could
you imagine that?

Wouldn't it be neat if
Blackstone came here?

That'll never happen.

[poof]

Blackstone!

Yo!

Wow, great to see you!

Hello Luigi, how are you.

I'm terrific!

You know, it's
good to see you.

How is your magic act going?

Ahhh I'll tell you
not so good Blackstone.

You know, I'm having a lot of
trouble with that disappearing

object trick.

Oh.

I'll tell you what, why don't
you demonstrate it for me and

perhaps I can give you
a couple of pointers?

You would do that for me?

Of course.

Wow.

Mario!

Can I borrow the ball?

Sure.

Thanks.

Here we go.

Thanks.

Ok now, I cover the ball
and, I say the magic words;

the basketball will vanish.

Here we go.

Ooshee wooshee
goose goose goose,

basketball will now vamoose!

No no, those are not
the right magic words,

those are the
wrong magic words.

Here try this: it's gooshee
wooshee moose moose moose.

Oh.

Gooshee wooshee,
moose moose moose,

basketball will now vamoose!

I did it!

Hahaha, very good Luigi!

Now you know the
correct magic words,

and I want you to be
very oh... I'm sorry,

I've got to go I've got a
luncheon appointment with Erik

Estrada.

Oh ho ho ho.

Oh word of caution, be careful
how you use those magic words

because sometimes they
can be a lot of problems.

Gotcha Blackstone.

Goodbye fellas.

Farewell!

[poof]

Mario, I can now
make things disappear!

By the way, I'm
sorry about your ball.

Don't worry about it
Luigi it was your ball.

♪ Yo, yo! ♪

♪ It's the Mario Brothers
and plumbing's their game, ♪

♪ found the secret warp zone
while working on the drain, ♪

♪ lend the princess a
hand in the Mushroom Land. ♪

♪ Comin' atcha
with the plumbers, ♪

♪ you'll be hooked
on the brothers! ♪

♪ Noooooow, Evil Koopa and his
Troopas are up to misbehaving, ♪

♪ they kidnapped the princess;
Mushroom Land needs saving. ♪

♪ Abusing and confusing
everybody he discovers, ♪

♪ they can't help but be
hooked on the brothers! ♪

♪ Unh! ♪♪

[thunder]

Plumber's
log number .

We were traveling
through a strange land called

Turtlevania.

Somebody had pulled the plug
on that big bathtub in the

sky, and we were soaked!

Ooooh I'm freezing!

When are we going to
find a place to sleep?

Never fear Princess.

There's bound to be a
motel around here somewhere.

[laughter]

Those pesky plumbers are
playing right into my fangs.

[laughs]

Mousigor!

Yes Count Koopula?

Prepare rooms for
Princess Toadstool,

and her foolish friends.

And you, you vapid vampire,
go lure our victims into my

castle.

[laughs]

[caw]

[Koopa:] Before the
night is through,

I'll make them wish they
never came to Turtlevania.

[laughs]

I'm cold, and wet,
and hungry Mario.

How about some spaghetti?

It's my leftovers Luigi.

You ate all yours.

But you had three orders.

I only had one.

Come on Mario, fair-sies.

Ok, but just one bite.

[caw]

Help!

Spaghetti napper!

[grunting]

[Toad:] Yow!

Grab him Luigi!

Pull!

Pull!

Wooooow!

I can't hold on!

Ahhh!

[caw]

Follow that bat!

We've got to get
that spaghetti back!

[Princess:] Oh no!

Look where he's going!

[Toad:] Oooh, scary.

[Luigi:] I'm not going in there,
it looks like a boarding house

for vampires.

Come on Luigi.

Nobody believes in
vampires anymore.

I do.

[Mario:] Look, we need shelter,
and maybe we can get that

spaghetti back.

[ding dong]

Uhhh, we need
rooms for the night.

We got rooms
you'll never forget.

[laughs]

I don't like
this creepy castle.

You like sleepin'
in the rain better?

[bing bing bing]

Wha-wha-what're
you lookin' at?

Are you talking to
yourself again Luigi?

Look at the pa-pa-paintings.

Huh?

[Mousigor:]
Your room miss.

Thank you.

You two guys with
hairy lips can stay here.

Hey, what's behind
door number three?

Lemme guess.

[Mousigor:] Don't
strain your brain Toad!

Ahhhh!

Hey, how'd you know my name?

Who are you?

Woahhhh!

Ahhh.

Wow!!!

You're Mouser!

You're Koopa's stooge!

It's Mousigor to
you, fungus face.

I'm trapped!

[Luigi:] I tell ya,
there's vampires here!

Stop already.

I'm too hungry to worry about
vampires that don't exist.

Hey-hey-hey.

Where did you get that?

I thought the Tweeter
bat stole your spaghetti?

It did, but this is
my spare ravioli.

[slurping]

Holy macaroni!

My ravioli!

Fang marks!

Every drop of
tomato sauce, gone!

Now will you believe me?

Tomato sauce-sucking vampires!

Let's get outta here!

We're locked in!

If only you could talk.

Buzz off Mushroom Mouth.

Oh yeah?

How about a nose job?

Yeouch!

Well, well, well,
a secret passage.

Spy holes!

Hey guys!

Vampires!

No guys it's me!

And I know a way
to get outta here!

Come on!

Let's find the Princess!

Where is everybody?

Why's the door locked?

Come on Princess!

Let's split this spooky joint!

Welcome to the
castle, of Count Koopula.

Dinner is served.

[laughs]

And you're the main course.

[laughs]

I just lost my appetite.

Luigi was right!

Vampires!

Into the clothes chute,
it's our only way out,

or he'll turn us into
vampires like them!

Ahhhhh!

Whoa, Ahhhh!

[crash]

Oomph!

Whew!

That was close!

[screeching]

Sp-sp-sp--

Spit it out Luigi.

[gasp]

Spiders!

[Luigi:] D-d-d-do
something, Mario.

[gasp]

I forgot my bug spray!

Aha!

A magic Piranha Plant.

This'll take care
of those spiders.

Zap 'em, Princess!

[boom, boom]

[cheers]

[Luigi:] Way to go Princess!

[Mario:] We gotta
find a way outta here.

What's this?

Marinara Château Koopla, .

Heeeey!

It's tomato sauce!

We're surrounded by vampires,
and all he thinks about is

food!

Hey guys, look!

Koopa's up to something weird!

[Koopa:] I command you!

Behold, the full moon!

[stretching noise]

[howling]

He's turning them
into w-w-wereturtles.

[Koopa:] You can do what you
want with the faucet freaks,

but don't hurt the Princess.

Now find them!

[growling]

Oh spiders were bad enough,
but I can't stand wereturtles!

Don't worry Princess.

It's us they're
after, not you.

Yeah Princess, don't
worry, it's us they're after.

Us!?

Pour some of this spaghetti
sauce at the base of the

stairs.

[growling]

Ahhhhh!

[crash]

Over here!

I found a trap door!

[Luigi:] Cobwebs?

That means sp-sp-spiders!

It's safer than
staying in here.

[gasp]

[roar]

Help!

Holy macaroni!

Naughty turtle!

You've been
hittin' the sauce again!

Well, have some more!

[choking]

Move iiiiit!

Ahhhh!

[chanting]

[Mario:] It's a
tomato sauce factory!

Those Goombas look
kinda spaced out to me.

[gasp]

They're zombies!

Maybe we can sneak past them.

Mmmm, needs garlic.

Huh?

[jibberish]

Run for it!

Too late Princess.

[gasp]

I'm taking you to Count
Koopula's t*rture chamber,

wax museum, and
dungeon of horrors.

Hehehehe.

[Koopa:] Say ciao to your
friends Princess Toadstool!

That's goodbye in Italian,
because when you see 'em

again, you'll be a
tomato sauce-sucking vampire,

just like me.

[laughs]

But I hate tomatoes.

I always wanted to be taller,
but this is ridiculous!

Hoohoohahaha!

And this tickle
t*rture is not funny!

Hoohoohahahoohoo!

I hate leaks!

Somebody call me a plumber!

You're a plumber.

Luigi!

I think I got a way
to get us outta here!

Watch!

Hey Mousigor!

Why Toad, how you've grown!

Pleeeeeease Mister Mousigor,
I can't take any more!

And I say you can!

Whoaaaa-owww!

Whoa!!

There's more than one
way to trap a rodent.

Now my dear, it's time to
initiate you into the loyal

brotherhood of
tomato sauce vampires.

[Princess:]
Brotherhood?

But I'm a girl.

How do you stop a vampire?

A stake through the heart!

Top sirloin?

Filet mignon?

Vampires hate garlic.

That's why there's none in the
tomato sauce the Goombas were

makin'!

Good thinkin' Toad.

Eat this.

[chewing]

Yech!

The things I do for
Princess Toadstool.

[Princess:]
Ahhhh!

Hurry!

We gotta save her!

Unhand her, fang face!

Ahhh!

I hate sunlight!

Outta my way plumb scum!

This garlic will put
you outta the way.

[coughing]

[Mario:] He's
having a coffin spell!

I'll get you for this!

I'll be back, just
you wait and see!

[crash]

Hehehe!

Talk about
bringin' down the house!

I'm sure glad to be
saying ciao to Turtlevania.

Ciao?

That reminds me,
it's chow time!

I've got my spare cantellini!

Yo, my brother,
the pasta vampire.

[laughter]

Mario watch this you're
not gonna believe this forget

about this trick.

Are you ready?

Sure go ahead.

Watch this now.

Ooshee wooshee mush mush
mush, bowl of oranges,

now vamoose!

Yes!

Wow am I happy Blackstone
taught me the magic words,

this is fun!

Luigi you gotta stop
making things disappear.

Soon there won't
be anything left!

Oh yea?

Well let me ask you
something, who d*ed,

and left you boss?

How about if I make
you disappear ah?

Oh yea?

Go ahead, let me
see you do it.

You want to--?

Oh oh oh oh oh oh.

You asked for it
Mr. Tough Guy,

are you sure?

Yea, you and what army?

Go ahead.

What army, I'll
show you what army.

Don't be scared.

You ready?

Mooshee mooshee,
moosh moosh moosh,

Mario will now vamoose!

[Mario:]
Ohhh ok good for you
Luigi you made me disappear,

now make me reappear.

Uh oh.

What do you mean uh oh?

Well, I'll tell
you the truth Mario,

I never bothered to learn
how to make things come back.

What?

Luigi I'm gonna
come--

Oh uh, ow, ow.

I don't care if I
can get into movies free!

Make me reappear!

Will you just calm down and
watch these scenes from the

next Legend of Zelda?

Ow!

He's such a bad sport.

This is the
Triforce of Wisdom Link,

the evil Wizard Ganon
has the Triforce of power.

[laughter]

Whoever gets both
Triforces will rule this land

forever, you
must help me Link!

Hey for you Zelda, anything!

Brace yourself,
you're not a pretty sight.

[gasp]

No!

That's not me!

I'm a monster.

I've seen worse.

Hey you still have me,
I'll always be your friend.

Let's see you hop frog face!

[boing]

Ganon you fiend!

Leave him alone!

Haven't you done enough?

Of course not.

[snap]

[screech]

[ribbit]

Yum!

[gulp]

Eaaah!

What did I just do?

I ate two red deelers, yucko!

I don't think I can
handle this frog lifestyle.

Mr. Blackstone,
you gotta help me,

I need help.

I made Mario disappear.

Disappear?

Luigi didn't I warn you not to
play around with those magic

words?

I tried to remind him
Blackstone but he wouldn't

listen.

This is no time for lectures.

Luigi I want you to
repeat this words after me.

Ok.

Ping ping pear.

Ping ping pear.

Wing wing wear.

Wing wing wear.

Make old Mario.

Make old Mario.

Re-apear.

Re-apear?

Well I'm a
magician not a poet.

I don't
care if it rhymes.

Please.

Please.

Oh!

[laughs]

Mario are you alright?

Yea, no thanks to you.

Thanks to Blackstone.

Hey no problem boys.

Well, have you
learned a lesson Luigi?

Oh yea I sure have Blackstone.

I mean it really hurts when an
invisible brother has a mean

left hook.

[laughs]

What I said you gave
me--

'Til next time everybody!

Do the Mario!

♪ Do the Mario! ♪

♪ Swing your arms
from side to side, ♪

♪ come on, it's time to go! ♪

♪ Do the Mario! ♪

♪ Take one step,
and then again. ♪

♪ Let's do the Mario,
all together now! ♪

♪ You've got it! ♪

♪ It's the Mario! ♪

♪ Do the Mario! ♪

♪ Swing your arms
from side to side, ♪

♪ come on, it's time to go! ♪

♪ Do the Mario! ♪

♪ Take one step,
and then again. ♪

♪ Let's do the Mario,
all together now! ♪

♪ Come on now, it's
just like that! ♪♪
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