03x04 - Pigmas

[bunniefuu]

-[Mighty Eagle whistles]
-[campers laughing]

♪ Camp Splinterwood
Our summer home ♪

[rock melody]

♪ For catapulting!
Slingshotting! Getting thrown! ♪

♪ Campers rocket through the trees ♪

♪ Cannonballing where they please ♪

♪ Zipping in the air ♪

♪ Crashing everywhere ♪

♪ Archery, dodge-bird, Borb tennis ♪

♪ It's absurd! ♪

♪ Here they come!
Red, Stella, b*mb, and Chuck ♪

♪ Flying fast
Look out, duck! ♪

♪ All your life you'll be glad
you had this ♪

♪ Angry Birds Summer Madness! ♪

PIG CAMP

[Christmas music playing]

[all oinking Jingle Bells]

Yeah!

It's that time of year
known as Pigmas Eve,

when he flies through the sky,

making sure that we've adorned
our abodes with baubles and lights,

to deliver our presents
all through the night!

[all cheering]

Now, tell me, piglets,

who looks for Pigmas decorations
and brings us presents tonight?

[squealing and snorting]

That's right! Santa Pig!

All right, now. Who wants
to wallow in some warm cocoa?

[piglets cheering]

[knocking in the form of Christmas music]

[b*mb snoring Christmas music]

b*mb, you're snoring.

Oh, man. Again?

Utter darkness. Deafening noise.

This is it! This is the end!

No, false alarm. Thanks, b*mb.

[knocking]

Penley's nailing his socks to the wall.

[snorting and knocking]

Penley?

Penley?

What's...

Penley, you okay?

What is going on?

[yells]

[grunts]

Morning, cheeps. What's... up?

Well, turns out Penley's
completely lost his marbles.

[Penley snorting]

Hey!

[grunts]

Time-out!

Penley, dude, what's going on?

It's a book about... "Pigmas"?

What's a "Pigmas"?

[squealing]

It's a pig holiday where you hang up
lights and glitter and stuff,

to entice someone named Santa Pig

to fly down in his sleigh
on Pigmas Eve and give you presents.

[squealing]

Look at Pig Camp! You can't miss it!

They've even got sound effects!

Look, Penley, I know you want
this "Santa" to bring you a present,

but if he's flying around at , feet,
he's never gonna see this.

Well, Penley some people might say
you completely wasted your time.

Who's hungry?

[snorting]

[squealing]

Hey, Penley.

We can fix this.
Leave your disgusting sock on the wall.

[squealing]

Well, the only way we could do that
is if we decorate the entire camp.

Yes! That's exactly
what we're going to do!

And when this Santa guy
flies over to go to Pig Camp,

he'll see what we've done,
and come here first!

[squealing]

Well, that's great and all,
but tonight's Pigmas Eve!

-There's not enough time!
-Not with that attitude.

We'll work our tail feathers off
and get it done for Penley.

[Red screaming]

Susie Pigmas, everyone!

No, it's "Merry." "Merry Pigmas."

Oh yeah. Merry Pigmas!

How's it going?

-Not good.
-What's the problem?

We don't have Pigmas decorations.

So we're just
kind of putting glitter on stuff.

That'll have to do.

We'll need them
on every tree and trash can

if Santa Pig's gonna notice us.

Do you smell something burning?

[both yell]

[Red panting]

-Chuck, what are you doing?!
-I'm lighting the Pigmas tree.

You're supposed to do it with lights.

Oh!

Well, can't let a good fire go to waste.

Don't worry, cheeps.

I got this.

[laughing]

[laughing]

Or not.

Santa Pig'll never show up
if we don't get this done by tonight!

What's the meaning of this?
Take down these ridiculous decorations!

Harold, be a dear and put Chuck out.
He seems to be on fire.

Oh, yes, dear.

Thank you!

But we need them! So Santa Pig will come.

Why would we want
a magical pig to come here?

To deliver presents for Penley.

[snorting]

[Stella screaming]

I forgot we had a pig at camp.

Of course we should decorate!

Harold, let's get everyone
to help make a Pigmas for Penley.

Yes, dear.

[sighs]

Did Lynette just agree to help?

I read about this in Penley's book.
It's one of those Pigmas miracle things.

[branch breaking]

Penley, darling. Shouldn't you be working
on a present list for Santa Pig?

[squealing]

Run along, then. Write your list.
And make sure it's a healthy one, hmm?

Ready,

aim,

decorate!

[festive music playing]

[laughing]

Let it snow!

Hey! It looks fabulous!

-Why is it yellow, though?
-It's vanilla pudding.

Well, let's hope Chuck
doesn't eat it all before Santa comes.

And they say never eat yellow snow.

[burps]

[knocking on door]

Penley! It's been too long.

Susie Pigmas, buddy.

Heard you're writing a list
for Santa Pig. Mind if I take a look?

"Cowboy hat."

"Penguin plushie." Yeah, no.

How about we sh**t
for some non-lame presents, huh?

VR headset, couple of hoverboards,
fur bomber jacket,

and monogrammed towels
with the name "Neiderflyer" on them.

Just what you always wanted, right?

Hey, Penley! Come look!
You're going to be really surprised!

[sighs]

No peeking.

b*mb, your knee is poking my spleen!

[all laughing]

Merry Pigmas, Penley!

[snorts]

[festive music playing]

[all cheering]

You think Santa Pig's gonna notice?

Great!

[all grunting]

So, now we wait.

No one said anything about waiting.

Think he's coming?

He'd better. 'Cause I'm not freezing
my butt feathers off for nothing.

What are you doing here?

Same thing you are.
Waiting for those presents.

We're doing this for Penley.

Well, that's selfish.
Why can't we do it for Penley and me?

-Hey, listen. Is that dingle balls?
-You know, I think you're right!

Ho ho ho!

There he is!

Merry Pigmas!

[all cheering]

Awesome!

Think he saw us?

[all exclaiming]

Santa!

Hi, Santa!

Yeah! He saw us!

He saw me!

Look at the size of that sack!

Come to papa!

Yeah! Santa!

Hi, Santa!

Ho ho ho...

[expl*si*n]

[yelling]

No!

That's bad, right?

Is that bad? That looked bad.

He came down near the dojo! Come on!

[all grunting]

Oh no! Santa's sleigh!

Where's Santa Pig?

Ho ho-how dare you? It's Pigmas Eve!

How could you do this?

Oh, it was easy.

I sh*t you down, and now I'm taking
your presents to sell online for cash.

It's the gift of giving. To myself!

Toodlee-oo! Do have a Martha Pigmas.

It's "Merry Pigmas"!

And it's "ho ho..."

Holy moly!

[dramatic music]

[screams in delight]

She is definitely on the naughty list.

This is all our fault.

If we hadn't lured Santa Pig down here,

he'd be delivering presents
to the pigs right now.

How dare she hijack
the presents I tried to hijack.

We can still save Pigmas for everyone.

You guys free Santa.
b*mb and I will go get the presents.

With you all the way, Rod.
Let's go save those presents.

I mean, Pigmas.

[all grunt]

[all scream]

Can you believe it?

Cashmere.

Mama needs a new beak job.

Who wants a set
of monogrammed towels, cheap?

[laughs]

Those are my towels!
We've got to stop her!

[grunts]

Santa Pig!

We're here to rescue you.

[squealing]

Be careful, children.

These laser beams are alarmed.

They're alarmed?

I'm the one about to do something
stupidly dangerous and totally idiotic.

[Christmas music playing]

[both exclaim]

[Christmas music playing]

It's beautiful.

Bravo!

Six years of ballet boot camp.
You're welcome.

[horn blares]

Uh-oh.

Come on! Quick!

Come on, Santa Pig. This way.

[crashing sounds]

[all yelling]

Follow me!

[all screaming]

Oh yeah!

The alarm! Someone's at the dojo!

Merry Pigmas, ma'am!

What...

The name's Redmond von Fishburger III,

and I'm collecting on behalf

of the Disenfranchised
Avian Adolescent Society.

Isn't it rather late
to be out collecting donations?

Is it?

You know, I seem to have misplaced
my adult pocket watch.

You! You'll never get
your hands on my presents!

No!

b*mb! Where's the sack?

Oh, it was super heavy.

Neiderflyer was being really nice
and offered to help.

You know, I think we've misjudged him.

Neiderflyer!

[Neiderflyer panting]

[both grunting]

I don't think so, Neiderjerk.

We'll take that.

What? Isn't Pigmas
supposed to be about sharing?

That hurts me more
than b*mb sitting on top of me right now.

By the way, you mind?

Sorry.

[Stella whistling]

Over here!

It's really great to meet you, Santa.

We're sorry about everything.

Well, I was just telling
little Penley I'm so grateful.

But I really do have to hurry,

or there'll be no time
to get the presents to the piglets.

That's why your sleigh's in the catapult.

Yeah, because the engines
are filled with water, and dirt,

and seaweed, and fish, and dirt,
and dirt, and pebbles, and more dirt.

Before I forget, Penley, this is for you.

[snorts and laughs]

Ho ho ho! Merry Pigmas, everyone!

-Bye, Santa!
-Bye, Santa!

Isn't Pig Camp that way?

Well, that's awkward.

And he forgot that.

Neiderjerk!

Did you steal Santa's sack?

Oh, "steal" is such an ugly word.

Hand over those presents! And that's an
order!

After all the work I did? No way!

Neiderflyer's right! Kinda.

The Pig Camp is counting on us now.
We got to get them their presents.

Stuff it in your stocking, Lynette!

Have it your way.

[gulps]

[Neiderflyer yelling]]

[squealing]

[all yelling]

[screaming]

b*mb! Speak to me, buddy.

I see a candy cane tunnel.

Oh, man! We're losing him!

Don't go into the tunnel, b*mb!

But it looks so tasty.

[laughing]

[panting]

Yes!

[screaming]

[squealing]

Not now, Penley. Can't you see
we're in a battle for Pigmas?

Penley, what...

[Penley squealing]

[laughing]

[bells chiming]

All right, cheeps! Let's go!

I'll cover you!

For Pigmas!

No! Stop!

Come on, Stella!

Stella!

Just go on without me.

Stella, it's pudding. You're fine.

Oh yeah. Let's go.

No...

[yelling]

[growling]

[all cheering]

[Red] Okay!

We've got a Pigmas to deliver.
The Pig Camp is counting on us now.

[Red exclaims]

Boring. Got two of those.

Lame.

All right! A hoverboard!

-Oh, come on!
-Hey! That belongs to a pig!

Yeah! His name's Norbert.

What? Like he's going to know.

There's enough here for all of us.
Forget the pigs.

[squeals]

[grunting and squealing]

My hoverboard!

Pig Camp approaching!

[all cheering]

Yeah!

How do we get the pigs their presents?

[chuckles]

We use these.

Make it count, cheeps.

Ready, aim, fire!

[festive music playing]

All right!

[exclaims]

[squeals]

[Christmas music playing]

[all cheering]

Is that everyone?

[all cheering]

Oh no.
Piglet with no present, at six o'clock!

Santa's sack's empty!

[squeals]

Are you sure, Penley?

[squeals]

[cheers]

You did it!

Guys? Loving this moment,
but ground approaching!

[all scream]

Santa!

Well done, everyone!
I couldn't have done Pigmas better myself.

Really?

I was being polite.

Penley, I have another gift for you.

Well, my work is done here.
Time for me to head home.

Santa Pig, take us with you
to your icy castle in the sky!

Of course.

You're all more than welcome.

[all cheering]

Ho ho ho! Susie Pigmas!

[theme music playing]