01x19 - Robotnik's Rival

[bunniefuu]

[CLOCK TICKING] [ALARM]

♪ ♪ ♪

Aha!

My Hedgehog-seeking Radar system worked perfectly!

Face it, Robotnik NOTHING you invented works perfectly!

Oh yeah?

Name ONE thing that doesn't!

I'll name TWO things!

Scratch! Grounder!

Did someone call?

I think I heard my name.

Okay, you made your point.

Your last point!

Once my Magna Beam hits you, you'll be magnetized and pulled

to the Mobius North Pole. Forever!

Sounds chilly!

I'll just go home and pack some long underwear.

Fire the Magna Beam!

What? What is that hum?

I don't know, but whatever it is, it's BIG!

Hey, what gives?

Looks like we're headin' south!

Turn up the Magna Beam!

What's goin' on?

Beats me and before someone beats us,

let's race, ace.

You idiot!

I would have had that hedgehog if it wasn't for you..

whoever you are!

If it wasn't for YOU, you ridiculous fool,

l would have gotten rid of that hedgehog!

Ridiculous!

What business is it of yours anyway?!

Why, I plan to take over the entire planet of Mobius and

declare myself absolute ruler, of course.

Of course.

Now about this.

WHAT DID YOU SAY????

And when I've taken over this miserable planet,

I'll turn it into a shrine to ME,

Brandon Quark, PHD, DDS, CEG!

Scratch: What's CEG stand for?

Crazy Evil Genius! Natch.

Well, it just so happens that I am taking over Mobius

and making it a shrine to ME, Quack!

That's QUARK, egg boy!

And I've never seen anything as preposterous as you!

Check a mirror, duck butt!

Okay, so I had a little lab accident with a duck!

But all that's just water off a duck's back!

Forget it, Quack.

With my scientific genius you haven't got a chance!

You call those windup toys scientific genius?

Get a load of this, Egg Boy!

You summoned me, Dr. Quark?

This is a DUFUS - Design unit Flexible Underling Substitute,

the most powerful w*apon on the planet!

And now for a little demo, Robotnik.

I am a Prototype DUFUS, capable , of offensive modes.

Ohhhhh!

This planet isn't big enough for you and me!

Your belt isn't big enough for you!

Look who's quacking!

I'm not a duck! I'm not a duck!

I'm not a duck!

I propose a contest!

Whichever of us captures Sonic the Hedghog shall have sole

dominion over Mobius.

You got it!

There's nothing like a fair fight!

And this'll be NOTHING like a fair fight.

Woah! Free eats?

Great! I'm starving!

Wait, li'l pal.

I smell a rat!

Nah, that's the sauerkraut!

Yikes!

Hey! I've got ants in my pants!

There must be a billion of 'em!

Tails Look!

The food has lured 'em!

Let's get outta here!

Oh! I can't figure it!

Dr. Robotnik's Ants Trance Enhancer couldn't keep 'em from

goin' after that food.

Hey! Where'd that picnic table come from, anyway?

It is I, DUFUS.

Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle!

That is beyond your capability.

I, on the other hand...

Have you trapped Sonic yet, you two idi - -er,

highly developed automated apparatuses!

Apparatuses?

That isn't even a word!

It is NOW, Quack!

That's Quark!

Brraap!

If it wasn't for your lame ant hypnotizer,

I would have captured that hedgehog.

Lame?

My Ants Trance Enhancer is foolproof!

I'll show you!!

AAAH! YEOW!! OOOCH!

Well, it's the end of another day.

A little sudden, don't ya think!

Robotnik: Thanks to my Darkenator!

Quickly! Scratch! Grounder! Grab them!

Sonic: That voice sounds familiar.

[crash]

Tails: That CRASH sounds familiar!

Scrach: Oh! Get off me, you lugnut!

Robotnik: Who are you calling a lugnut?

Scratch: Oh, not you, your Rottenness!

Him! I would, I would never call you...

Sonic: That stupidity sounds familiar.

Having fun?

Turn out that light!

That's not just a light.

It's my Solar Polar Molar.

In that cas, shut your mouth.

Not before my solar breath burns Sonic into hedgehog chips!

Sounds like a great party!

I'll bring the dip!

You are the dip!

Careful!

If the solar ray touches my Darkenator,

there's no telling..

...what might happen.

This failure was probable to a factor of , to .

Oh, can it!

Of course, the mathematic probablilty can be altered.

If you were to combine forces, the success-slash-failure ratio

is , to .

Combine forces?

Preposterous idea!

Absurd idea.

I like it.

Might work.

Chilidogs!

Get yer Chilidogs!

Absolutely free!

No chargerino!

I'll take forty three chilidogs with everything to go.

Comin' right up!

Slow down, bud.

Doesn't this sound familiar?

FREE chili dogs?

Maybe I'm dreamin' so it don't matter.

And maybe it's one of those crazies tryin' to get his mitts

on yours truly!

Ooooo!!

Let's just sit here until we're sure what the score is.

Robotnik: Exactly as you predicted!

Uh oh!

It's time to buzz, cuzz.

DUFUS: I'm afraid the probability against that is , to one.

Your plan was pure genius.

Your execution was superb.

Now that Doctors Quark and Robotnik have joined forces...

As far as you and your precious Mobius are concerned..

It's light's out!

Tails: So what's the plan?

Sonic: Plan? There's no plan.

You mean we're gonna spend the rest of our lives right here?!

Looks that way, li'l bud.

But I've got library books still out!

In that case... [whispers]

Awright!

That's what I call a plan!

We'll be outta here in no time!

Ah-ha!

Hmm?

Oooff!

Ugh!

Oh! Leggo-a my hand!

If they escape, you know who'll get blamed.

YOU!

Okay!

Ya better tell us what your plan is.

Yeah! So we can stop

-OW! Actually, we were just, uh, curious.

Well, it's too late, boys, cause we already escaped!

Well, thanks anyway...

You WHAT?

We're just, uh, holo-...

Holographic projections, -D movies.

We skipped town an hour ago.

I don't believe it.

Yeah, if you were just holo, holo,

holo pictures, could I do THIS to ya?

No. And thanks!

Gotta run, hun!

So long, battery brains.

You did it again.

Yeah, but, but ya gotta admit it was a great plan.

And now we know what it is.

Oh! I gotcha now!

Where are the prisoners?

Uh, they, they, uh, uh.

They're still in there!

No, they're not.

They -OOF!

That does not make sense.

Mya sensors cannot sense them.

Yeah, well, uh, open the door and see.

Oh no! YOU et them out!

Look! The cell is empty!

I am confused. I have committed an error.

That is impossible.

The Hedgehog's ours!

What a team we make!

Robotnik and Quark!

That's Quark and Robotnik!

Join me for a little gloating in Sonic's cell?

I'm inviting you to join me.

DUFUS! Are you there?

What shall I do?

It's Dr. Quark!

Lie!

It is against my programming.

My circuits are hurting.

Once Doctor Robotnik and Quark see what you did,

your circuits will be hurting more!

Well, well.

Nice to see you stretching out!

Just wanted to rub it in before we go out to tour OUR planet.

We're going to parade through Mobius and bask in our conquest.

Hang out 'til we get back!

Scratch: Okay. The coast is clear.

Neat trick, Dufus!

I am confused.

I have deceived my creator.

I have lied.

I have betrayed.

So?

I can live with it.

We gotta make Quark and Robotnik hate each other again.

Yeah, the terrible twosome is double trouble.

Got any ideas?

Only a billion of 'em!

Let's race, ace!

Paper! Get yer paper!

"Quark calls Robotnik a Big Dope!"

So I'm a big dope am I?

Mobius Star! Getcha Mobius Star!

"ROBOTNIK SAYS QUARK MARRIED TO BIGFOOT"!

WHAT?!

So I'm married to Bigfoot am I?

Trash!

Garbage! I never read my reviews.

Um, have you seen my new Upside Downer Scrambler Blaster?

I was just about to show you my Shrinkerator.

Well, uh, perhaps later.

Yes. Later.

Yowwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Yeow! I knew it!

You traitor!

Me! I'm the one who's upside down!

Perhaps it was, uh, just an accident.

I don't like accidents.

How did the duckiewuckie feel about it?

Remember that separately you are both total losers!

Now kiss and make up!

Watch it, Dufus!

You're being insubordinate!

Uh, trust me?

Implicitly!

What's wrong with you?

I don't know.

Since that confusion in the jail cell my programming is

d-d-damaged.

"GENIUSES, DICTATORS, FRIENDS?!"

We better do somethin about this!

I got an idea!

I'm thinkin' maybe somethin' a little more drastic,

little bud.

What's this?

And now two of the top candidates for the coveted

BADDY award, Dr. Robotnik and Dr. Quark.

The BADDY Award?

Yes, the BADDY, presented by the Academy of Evil Arts and

Sciences to the most evil bad guy on Mobius!

And now to present the BADDY for the Best Performance by a

Megalomaniacal Evil Scientist in a Temper Tantrum,

here is that very popular comedy team of Scratch and Grounder.

Just read the cue cards...

The first neeminoo, er, nominee is Dr. Robotnik in

"The Bad, The Worse and The Ugly."

I'll squash you like bugs!

The next nominee is Brandon Quark for his performance in

"Silence of the, uhuh, Yams." Whoah!

I don't care if they ARE sweet potatoes!

I don't like the way they're looking at me!

And the winner is...

Yes, yes!

Brandon Quark.

I won! I won!

You hate me! You really hate me!

Little did I know that the gruesome little boy who began by

pulling the legs off his pet trantula would someday arrive

at this pinnacle of evil achievement...

I deserve it, of course, and I want to thank..

You rigged this, Quack!

That's Quark!

And you're just jealous.

Of you?

Don't make me laugh!

..Oh!

You are both getting to be a real drag.

Chill out, dudes!

Watch your tone.

I made you and I can break you.

I doubt it, Mother Goose!

Something strange has happened to that robot.

No hard feelings?

None at all!

Looks like we're gonna have to pullout all the stops,

li'l bud.

Robotnik: Let's separate and join up back at my,

er, OUR headquarters.

Excellent idea.

We'll be able to survey my... er..

OUR domain much more quickly..

Ta, ta!

Good-bye!

Why that Egomanlac! "Welcome to Quarkland!"

Welcome to Quarkland.

You have obviously arrived to enlist for the glorious w*r

against the inferior Robotnik..

Hail Quark!

Hail Quark!

Hail QU-OW!!

That's it!

He's gone too far!

It's duck hunting season, boys!

[siren]

What is the meaning of this?

Sorry.

No ducks allowed in Robotnik City.

I'm not a duck!

Robotnik City ordinance number C sub paragraph Q states that

no duck-like, half-duck or web-footed partially duckified

person or persons shall

CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP. GULP! Ooh!

I'll fry that Humpty Dumpty Dictator over easy..

with toast!

Coward!

You! Traitor!

Maniac!

Duck!

I am not a duck!

No, I mean "duck!"

Ahhh!

Robotnik will pay for this!

Blast them to atoms!

Dufus, att*ck them!

Whoah! Fraid not, man.

I order you!

Like, This scene is totally wack. I'm bailin'.

But, but, but.

Sorry, dude. Surf's up!

I should have made him less perfect.

Whereas I, in my infinite wisdom

designed MY robots to be complete idiots!

What do you have to say now, Quack?

That's Quack!

Quack!

QUAAAAACK!!!

Quack, Quack, Quack, Quack, Quack,

Quack, Quack, Quack, Quack, Quack,

Quack, Quack!

I guess he's flying south for the winter.

Not a bad idea!

Mmph!

That duckwad let you escape, did he?

Let's speed, keed!

Ooof!

Huh Woah..

Umph!

Turn the Duplicator on them!

You idiots!

He did it!

Uh oh.

You know what this means?

What?

Robotnik finally got the punishment he deserves:

himself!

Me first!

Me!

WE HATE THAT HEDGEHOG!!!!

On your marks, get set, go!

Quack!

The name's Quark!...Oof!

Yeow!

And no one wins!

Hey Quark! Robotnik!

Ever heard the expression "Cheaters never prosper?"

Nobody wins when you cheat.

Playing fair is the only way to go,

whether ya win or lose.

Sonic says.