03x06 - You're Only Young Twice

[bunniefuu]

♪ Hello, world, hear
the song that we're singin'

♪ Come on, get happy

♪ A whole lot of lovin'
is what we'll be bringin'

♪ We'll make you happy

♪ We had a dream
we'd go travelin' together

♪ And spread a little lovin'
then we'd keep movin' on

♪ Somethin' always happens
whenever we're together

♪ We get a happy feelin'
when we're singin' a song

♪ Travelin' along there's
a song that we're singin'

♪ Come on, get happy

♪ A whole lot of lovin'
is what we'll be bringin'

♪ We'll make you happy

♪ We'll make you happy

♪ We'll make you happy ♪

You owe me $,.

You didn't even look.

He knows them by heart.

Well, all I have is a $.

How 'bout a loan?

A heart of gold.

If his heart is gold, he
would have hocked it already.

Okay, kids. Time for bed.

Oh, Ma, can't we
stay up a little longer?

How did you know what
we were gonna say?

'Cause you say it
every night. Let's go.

Okay, Mr. Financier, you too.

Mom, do you think Howard
Hughes built his empire

going to bed this early?

Game's over, anyway.

You've got all the money.

Keith, maybe we
can work out that loan.

After all, you are family.

All right, Howard.
Quit stalling.

Hello?

Oh, yes, Miss Kennedy.

Danny's schoolteacher.

No, I didn't receive your note.

Oh, she gave Danny a note.

Yes, I'll be happy to meet
with Dr. Beecher tomorrow.

The school psychologist.

Okay. You can
cool the play-by-play.

I don't need Howard
Cosell for a brother.

Sarcasm.

The mark of a cowardly champion.

Yes. Thank you for calling.

Goodbye.

Boy, I sure am b*at.

I better go catch
up on some Z's.

You're gonna catch more
than that unless I see that note.

What note?

Oh, that note.

It blew away. Danny.

Funny how things slip your
mind and all of a sudden...

Zap, you remember.

Yeah, it's a scientific
principle, Danny.

It's called basic fear.

Well, it seems you've been
acting up in class lately.

Oh, Mom.

You can't believe
everything you read, can you?

Can she?

Thanks a lot.

All right, Danny.

I think an
explanation is in order.

What have you got to say?

To err is human,
to forgive, divine.

Okay.

You get ready for bed. You and I
are gonna discuss this in private.

I'll be there in a few minutes.

He is in for it.

Keith, will you do me a favor?

Lock Mom in her room?

No. Tell her in America,

you're innocent
till proven guilty.

What's the matter Danny,
you lost our appetite?

Never happens that
way in the movies. No?

No, in the movies the condemned
man always eats a hearty meal.

See ya. Have a good day.

Danny, if you gimme your baseball
cards, we'll bring them along.

Along where? On visiting days.

Do reform schools
have visiting days?

Everyone's a comedian.

Tracy, get going to school
or I'll break your crayons.

Are you still here?

You're going to
be late for school.

Mom, I've been thinking.

Maybe you shouldn't keep
that appointment today.

Oh, and why not?

Well, I hate to knock the old,

but Dr. Beecher, well,
she's practically sinile.

The word is "senile."

You heard that too, huh?

Plus she has this terrible cold.

Come to think of it, I have
one too. I better stay home.

Danny.

Quit faking and get to school.

One thing I love about you,
Mom, can't fool you for a minute.

No, you can't.

That's what I was afraid of.

Bye. Bye, Danny.

Just remember one thing, Mom,

kids with high IQs tend
to be very high-strung.

All kids go through phases.

And those with high IQs
tend to be very high-strung.

So I've heard.

Oh, I don't think
it's anything serious.

Lots of kids talk in class.

He just talks a little louder.

But if Danny's really
being disruptive,

I wonder if something's
bothering him.

Let's take a look
at this report, again.

It's amazing.

I've always wondered
how people do that.

It's just a matter
of self-preservation.

Keep your desk messy
so no one can find anything.

Makes me indispensable.

Well, basically, he seems
to need a lot of attention.

Well, that's a relief. Hmm?

I mean, that's
nothing new for Danny.

And from what you tell me,

there's nothing unusual
about his behavior at home.

No, it's just his usual
unusual behavior.

Okay.

The problem just may be
that he's the middle child.

According to theory,
that can create problems.

Do you believe in that theory?

No. I steer away from
theories and rules.

I like to treat children
as individuals.

However, in Danny's case,

it may have some validity.

What do you suggest I do?

How about trying an
experiment for just a few days?

Ever hear of permissiveness?

Yes. I don't think
I want to try that.

Why not? All you have to do is
let him make his own decisions.

That's why not.

Those decisions may give us a
clue as to what's bothering him.

Do you really think so?

Yes, I do.

And remember that when
you're ready to hit the ceiling.

Well, okay.

You're the doctor. Right.

And if things get too
rough, take two aspirin

and call me in the morning.

Goodbye. Goodbye.

Come on, Punky.
You're my only protection.

My Mom won't yell at
me while I'm on the phone

and she'll be home any minute.

Still on the phone, huh?

I can't talk to you now.

It's not gonna work, Danny,

unless you'd like to stay on
the phone the rest of your life.

Hi. Oh, hi, Mom.

Talk it up.

Uh, I can't talk
to you now, Mom,

uh, 'cause Punky's
got a big problem.

We're trying to solve
it over the phone.

Oh. It may take hours.

I may even skip dinner
as a favor to Punky.

Okay.

Okay?

That's it? You're not mad at me?

Uh-uh.

Oh, in case you're interested,

Dr. Beecher said
you're not in any trouble.

Nothing to get upset about.

You're kidding.

No, I'm not kidding.

And I had some other news, too,

but, oh, Punky's
problem comes first.

Bye, Punk. What's the news, Mom?

Okay, Danny, tell us
what your sentence is.

You're grounded
for a month, right?

Nope. Bed at : every night.

Nope. Come on, we know you're
gonna get punished somehow.

Yeah. What is it?

Nothing.

Must be worse than we thought.

Mom, I think I'll
watch a little TV.

I'll do my homework later.

That'll be fine, Danny.

Mom, what is going on?

She didn't understand
what Danny said.

You didn't understand
what he said, right?

I understood. You understood?

What happened to the
"homework before TV" rule?

Come here.

What?

I was going to explain this to you
later when Chris and Tracy were in bed.

They're a little
young to understand.

Understand what? Yeah. What?

I had a talk with the
school psychologist today,

and she suggested that I try to handle
Danny's problem with permissiveness.

You're kidding. Look, I
knew you'd understand.

It's only for a little while,

and it's for Danny's own good.

There's only one problem, Mom.

What happens if
he gets to like it?

Well, in that case,

I take two aspirin and call
the doctor in the morning.

Good night, Mom. Night, Mom.

Night, kids.

Good night, kids.

Thought I'd watch a
talk show with you, Mom.

Who's on?

You know, talk shows
are very stimulating.

The last three nights,
I've learned a lot.

Oh?

You mean there's something
about talking you don't know?

Bye, Mom. See you later.

Bye, kids.

Bye, kids.

Have a nice day.

Cute, aren't they?

Excuse me.

Keith.

Hey, Keith.

I noticed you were
a little on edge.

If you want, I can put in
a good word with Mom,

and you can stay
up late with us.

Gee, Danny, that'd be just
swell, except for one thing.

What's that? You'd be there.

If you think those
cards are great,

take a look at this one.

Wow. It's Sandy Koufax.

It's an actual antique.

Boy, that's great.

Sandy Koufax.

Excuse me. Oh, sure.

Hey, where you going?

Nowhere, it seems.

Hey, look. We missed
the start of the movie.

How did that happen?

Well, uh, it's been nice
talking to you, Richard.

Sorry.

Boy, you get me talking
about sports, I can't stop.

Hey, I'm sorry, Laurie.

Well, that's okay.

We can watch some television
or listen to some records.

Okay.

Hey, if I can make a suggestion,

there's a great
Knute Rockne film on.

Knute Rockne? Really?

Yeah. You want to go
watch it in my room?

No.

No, we could all
watch it down here.

Knute Rockne, he's my idol.

You know something, Laurie?

Your brother is
really a swell kid.

What's happening?

Oh, sorry. Did I wake you?

What time is it?

: in the morning.

: in the morning?
What are you doing up?

Well, you missed the Friday
night movie about Knute Rockne,

and I'd figure you'd want
to catch the second feature.

It stars Buster Crabbe.

Well, you figured wrong.

Okay. Forget TV.

Thanks.

How 'bout a game of cards?

Okay. Forget TV.

Forget everything. You're
just not night people.

You want night
people? Try the milkman!

Oh.

Mom, do you know what that
liberated midget did to me?

What now?

Do you know that
because of this plan,

I spent my date last night
looking at baseball cards

and watching an old
Knute Rockne movie? Right.

And, besides that, my jaws hurt.

Your jaws hurt?

Yes, from gritting my teeth.

Look, kids, I know this
has been hard on you.

It certainly has.

But I intend to do
something about it.

Right. I'm gonna
have a talk with Danny.

Wrong.

Mom, we hate to
give you an ultimatum,

but unless that kid is back on
his leash within hours, we quit.

The group?

No, the family.

Am I late?

About two days.

I figured you'd be crawling
here on your hands and knees.

Sit down.

You knew what it would be like?

Well, I had an idea.

I went through it with my kids.

Why didn't you tell me?

Would you have done it?

Probably not. That's
why I didn't tell you.

But the worst
part is, it failed.

We're no closer to the solution
now than we were before.

On the contrary.

From what you told me
on the phone, it's a success.

We needed to know what his
problems were. Now we know.

We do?

Yes.

He wants to be an adult. He
wants to identify with the big kids,

Laurie, Keith...

And you.

What do I do now?

Phase two.

Start accepting him as an adult.

Now, wait a minute.

It's one thing for him to
think of himself as grown-up

and have the fun of
annoying the others.

It's another thing for him
to be accepted as an adult

with all the responsibilities
that go with it.

Hmm.

I think I see what
you're getting at.

You want to try?

Well, I may as well.

But what do I tell the kids?

So everything from now
on must include Danny,

just as if he were
one of your friends.

But, Mom, I like my friends.

Me, too. I object.

And you said that if we listened

and still had objections
that you would give us

a sound psychological
reason for doing it.

Mmm-hmm. You did.

Okay.

Because I say so.

Well, that's a sound
psychological reason.

Yeah, sure is.

Shirley, how long are
you gonna let this go on?

Our accountant just called.

Danny wanted to check the books.

Those aren't the only books
he's been going through.

He's been going through my phone
book and calling girls just to talk.

And I can't even bring
home a date anymore.

Mom, last night, I watched
Danny and Leonard Trimble

match pennies until midnight.

Please, let's all be patient.

I know he's weakening.

Yesterday I caught
him with a balloon.

He said it was Tracy's,
but I have my doubts.

He'll come around.

He's too stubborn to give in.

I think we should force it.

No forcing.

When the right opportunity
comes along, we'll know it.

Hi, g*ng. Hi, Keith.

Hey, I hear you and Molly are
going to go on a picnic tomorrow.

Want to double?

Bingo.

This is fun.

I mean, uh, stimulating.

Good lunch, Molly.

Yeah, the sandwiches
were terrific.

I don't like egg salad.

Oh, I'm sorry, Gloria.

Uh, what do you like?

Danny and I always
have hot dogs or tacos.

Gloria, hot dogs?

Egg salad is so much more, uh...

More mature.

Yeah, more mature.

Let's go to the swings, Danny.

Swings?

Gloria, swings are so babyish.

Aren't they, Keith?

Hmm?

Oh, yeah, right.

What are we gonna do now?

Just sit around?

No, of course not.

Are we?

Well, yeah.

We could sit here and, uh, talk.

Yeah.

What do you want to rap about?

Tell you what, Danny.
I'll rap with Molly,

and, uh, you rap
with Gloria, okay?

Right.

Don't you dare.

Don't be ridiculous.

Why don't, uh...

Why don't we take a walk, huh?

Okay.

I'm not having a good time.

You're not?

No. They don't want to play
ball or climb trees or anything.

All they want to do is talk

and make lovey-dovey eyes.

This is boring.

It is? Yes.

You're right.

See that tree over
there past the fountain?

Yeah.

I'll race ya.

Danny, Danny, come here.

Danny, that's not
exactly mature.

It isn't? No.

Good.

Well, Danny, we'll have
to double again soon.

Sure, Keith. Sure.

How was the picnic?

Okay.

You don't seem
too sure about that.

Well, don't tell Keith, Mom,

but he's boring.

Boring? Yeah.

Nothing personal, but so
are you and Mr. Kincaid.

I mean, it's not you.

It's what you have
to do as adults.

What do you mean?

Well, I've been a kid,
and I've been an adult.

And, believe me, adultery
isn't what it's cracked up to be.

Danny, the word is "adulthood."

Yeah, adulthood.

But I thought you
were enjoying it.

Well, I can't figure it out.

I mean, at first it was fun,

and then all of a
sudden, it wasn't.

Is that what it's like
when you get old?

Well, honey, it may sound corny,

but some people
think that being a kid

is the best time in your life.

But most kids
never realize that.

Well, I hope you're
not mad at me,

but I'd like to hang on to
my youth a little while longer.

I think that's a good idea.

I was wondering...

Are you still at an age
when a mother can hug you?

I don't know what the age is,

but it's all right with me.

♪ Something's in the wind

♪ Something I can't touch

♪ Just a feeling that I've got

♪ Oh, no ♪ Oh, no

♪ Am I losin' you? ♪
Am I losin' you, baby?

♪ Am I losin' you? ♪
Am I losin' you, baby?

♪ Is there something
that I can do?

♪ Am I losin' you?
♪ Am I losin' you?

♪ You keep on telling me

♪ No, please not tonight

♪ Something just ain't right

♪ Oh, no ♪ Oh, no

♪ Am I losin' you? ♪
Am I losin' you, baby?

♪ Am I losin' you? ♪
Am I losin' you, baby?

♪ Is there somethin'
that I can do?

♪ Am I losin' you?

♪ Am I losin' you?

♪ Those happy
days we spent together

♪ Can you forget them overnight?

♪ This was
supposed to last forever

♪ But forever's slippin'

♪ Out of sight

♪ I used to get to you

♪ Till you'd shake inside

♪ But you ain't
satisfied ♪ Oh, no

♪ Oh, no

♪ Am I losin' you? ♪
Am I losin' you, baby?

♪ Am I losin' you? ♪
Am I losin' you, baby?

♪ Is there somethin'
that I can do?

♪ Am I losin' you?

♪ Am I losin' you?

♪ Am I losin' you? ♪
Am I losin' you, baby?

♪ Am I losin' you? ♪
Am I losin' you, baby?

♪ Is there somethin'
that I can do?

♪ Am I losin' you?

♪ Am I losin' you? ♪

Hi, Mom. Hi, Mr. Kincaid.

Hello. Hi, kids.

How's he doing?

Well, he's talking
less at school.

Oh, that's good. But
he's talking more at home.

Oh, that's bad.

Actually,
everything's just fine.

Come on, Danny. Let's play ball.

Good idea.

Hi. Hi, Laurie.

Hi, Mom. Hi, Mr. Kincaid.

Hi, Laurie. What's all that?

Oh, there was a
really great sale today.

I got some terrific things.

Do you want to see? Oh,
that's great. Let's go upstairs.

Hi, Laurie.

Hi, Gloria.

Would you like
to see what I got?

Oh, could I?

Sure. Come on.

Gloria, what about playing ball?

Oh, honestly, Danny,
you're so immature.

I don't understand it.

Yesterday I was too mature.

Well, old or young, don't
ever try to figure out women.