02x13 - Episode 13

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "House Husbands". Aired:2 September 2012 – 17 April 2017.*
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Australian television comedy drama that follows four fathers who stay at home to raise their children.
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02x13 - Episode 13

Post by bunniefuu »

This is just silly. You are nuts.

Can we just turn around?
I'm not turning around.

Alright. Where are we going?
I don't know that yet.

Oh, OK.
Can you just shut up for a second?

I don't even know
how to drive this thing.

You're riding the clutch.
What?

If you don't release it fully,
you put too much stress on it.

You're worried about stress
on the clutch plate!

What about my stress?
You made me steal a car!

I made you steal a car!

Stealing a car was all your idea.

What are we doing out here?

Hey, get back in the car.
It's raining.

(SHOUTS) Shut up
and let me think for a second!

How could you do this?!
You lost grand to that dickhead!

You could have just left me alone.

You were about to go to
another game!

You think I'm just going to let you

flush your entire life
down the toilet?

Hey, what are you doing?
You can't even drive that thing.

(ENGINE STARTS)

Hey!

Lucy!

Hey, Lucy!
(TYRES SCREECH)

Lucy!

GEMMA: What is that?

This is a ceiling medallion.
It's for Justin's.

You do know it's
the middle of the night.

I put this in - the house is done.

Can I smell walnuts?

Ah... the slice.

You're baking?
Yeah.

It's for mothers' group.

It's my turn to bring a plate.

Are you alright?

You know what they're like.

They can tell if it's not homemade.

OK.

I'm off to work.

I've got a double shift.

(SNORING)

You know, you could do with
some sleep too.

(PHONE RINGS)

(SIREN WAILS)

Hi.
Licence, please.

Was it the bunny hopping?

Sorry. I'm actually
not used to driving manual.

It's not my car.
I mean, I didn't really...

I didn't steal it or anything.
I just borrowed it.

Has it been reported?

Because, honestly,
I was on my way to return...

I pulled you over because you failed
to indicate at the intersection.

Oh! That's different. Um...

How about I promise to drive
more carefully,

and I just go on my merry way?

GEMMA: So, Lewis has gone insane.
That's nothing new, is it?

He's baking.
That is new.

I don't know what he's going to do
now that Justin's house is finished.

He needs a project.

Thanks, Maddie.
Thanks.

How's your project going?
-week scan tomorrow.

Oh, yeah, you know,
with the miscarriage,

it'll be good to see
a little person in there -

heart pumping, head, shoulders,
knees, toes. (LAUGHS)

And, you know, then there's
the whole age thing.

My risk factors have gone up
since Poppy.

You're not old.

% higher chance of miscarriage,

% higher risk of
ectopic pregnancy,

% higher risk of stillbirth,
double the risk of Down syndrome,

% higher chance of
gestational diabetes,

.% increased risk of
placenta previa,

and % increased risk of
a preterm birth.

But you know what?
I'm not focusing on the numbers.

Mmm, clearly.

(PHONE RINGS)

Lucy.
Dad?

Why are you answering Harry's phone?
Well, he's here.

Didn't have a key to drop him

back at your place.

He's a bit under the weather.

Did you get my message?
No... I've been busy.

That is great that Harry's with you.
No problem.

Everything's really good here.

Lucy, what's going on?

Dad, calm down.
You were charged with theft.

Why would I calm down?

A local court appearance,

a fine, a warning,

and then everything will be
forgotten about.

This isn't you, Lucy.

Phoebe I expect to steal a car at
some point in her life, but not you.

Justin was going to do something
really stupid.

Where did he go?

He made his own way home.

JUSTIN: Lucy.

What are you doing?

Can we talk?
I'm going to bed.

Hey, please, just wait!

I just want to say thank you.

I could have lost more money.

Right.

I was...

I was way out of line back there,
OK?

I didn't...

..didn't mean to do...

..what I did.

Take it back.

Good. I take back
ever trying to help you.

So... we're even.

Now just please leave me alone.

What's going on?
Did you do something bad?

Because Dad's acting really weird,
which is great,

because it means he's distracted
and won't hit the roof

when he finds out
that I failed maths.

Can you let me in?

Yeah.

Hi.

Hey. Sorry about last night.

I really shouldn't drink,
especially beer.

No more... beer for me.

It's cool. You were... happy.

Yeah, a little too happy.

Luckily Lewis rescued me.

How did the rest of your night
end up?

Oh... just the usual.

You know, work, the pub.
Yeah.

Don't you start your new job
at your big, posh law firm today?

Yeah. I should get ready, actually.

We'll see you later.
See you.

Oh, here, Lewis.

ABI: Hello!

Hey, you.
Mummy!

Hi, gorgeous girl.
Hey, look what I've made.

You know how you have to take
a model in for your graduation.

We're not allowed to take
peanuts to school.

It's not a peanut, sweetie.
It's a kidney.

And it works just like a real one.

See how the nephrons
filter out the waste from the blood

and pump them out the ureter?

Isn't it clever?

Mr Tuck said that mums and dads

aren't supposed to do the homework
for us.

I think Mr Tuck might have a point.

Well, I made a volcano!

Look what she made...

..all by herself.
Great.

What does it do?
Mummy!

It doesn't do anything. She made it.

That's fantastic, sweetheart.
But did you see Mummy's?

Look how the heart...
pumps the blood around.

Whoo-hoo!

Darling, go and get dressed,
darling.

Look. Hey!

You need to help me convince her
to take the kidney.

That doesn't even look like
a volcano.

I don't know how to say this.
You are...

You are acting a little bit weird...
and a little bit mean.

It's her graduation. I just
want her to have a perfect model.

Are you worried about
the ultrasound today?

What?!

This whole perfect kidney,
everything has to be perfect.

No, of course not!

Whatever happens, happens. I...

I'm not even thinking about it.

We have one healthy child.

Are you freaking out about the scan?

I'm freaking out about the scan.
Come here.

(DOORBELL RINGS)
I'll get it!

I'll be there with you
every step of the way.

Uncle Kane's here.
Hey.

Hey!
Look what I made.

Wow! That's great, Pops.

Have you made your project, Stella?
Nuh.

No, not yet.
Thinking of making a diorama.

What's that?

It's a box, and you fill it
with the favourite thing
you've learnt this year.

What are you going to put in there,
Stell?

Nothing.

There must be something
you liked learning.

Nuh.
Oh...

Right, well, we better get going.
Lewis is in the car.

He's taken bad mood
to a whole new level.

He lost grand?!

Shh!

You don't know his side of the story
yet.

He made my daughter steal a car,

then he pissed off
and left her to cop the blame.

I don't need his side of the story.

Well, whatever happened last night,
we need to put it aside.

Today is supposed to be
a special occasion.

Agreed. We've been
working for months.

We put on the finishing touches,
and it's celebration time.

I'll put it in, then I'm going home.

Hey!
Hey, we got the medallion.

Shall we do the honours?

It's a great house.

Look, it's a good size block.

It's close to schools and shops.

I've got a list of buyers
who'd be interested.

I'll be in touch.

Yeah.
Great.

I've decided to sell.

(DOOR SLAMS)

Well, that went well.

WOMAN:
Welcome to William Garrett Barker.

Great to be here.

I'm so excited
about this internship.

I mean, obviously,
it's a very prestigious firm and...

You have a great office.

I've worked my guts out
to get this view.

They'll have to drag my dead body
out of here. I'll never give it up.

Wow! OK.

The legal world is still
a boys' club, Lucy.

Women have to work times as hard
to get noticed.

That's just how it is.

Us girls have to stick together.

So, any problems - anything at all -
you come to me, alright?

Well...

..actually, there is...

..one thing.

We should have brought Lewis.

Like he's gonna want
to help Justin right now.

We can be men without Lewis.

I've got a bad feeling about this.

Just stick to the plan,
we'll be fine.

Oh. Hi!
Hey!

Uh, w-we were just...
walking on our way to school,

and we realised we were a bit...
A little bit early.

Yeah.

Uh... we thought maybe Melody
might like a play date.

(CHUCKLES) Yeah.

We've gotta get ready for school.

It's funny that,

because Stella was just telling me
how much Melody likes space.

And we are experts at making
space dioramas. (CHUCKLES)

Hi, Melody.
Hi.

Have you made your space diorama
for prep graduation?

No, not yet.
Oh.

Luckily, we brought glitter glue.

So, uh... you and Justin
had a few drinks last night.

Heard it was a high-stakes game.

Did you also hear
your mate's daughter stole my car?

Oh, I'm sure she didn't mean it.

No, she wouldn't have done that.
Yeah.

There. All done.

Can I show them the cubby?

Five minutes.

Come on, Stella.

STELLA: Wait up, Melody!
Come on!

Simon, I know you don't like Justin,

but when he was with your wife,
you guys were on a break.

You need to give Justin
his money back.

(SIGHS) Now, why
would I want to do that?

Well, his wife d*ed. He's not rich.

He's gonna have to sell his house
to pay you back.

Where is that cheque he wrote?

Ah. Here we go.

Lucky you reminded me.

Now I'll remember to bank it.

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Excuse me, fellas.

What a prick!

I can't believe he...
It's $, - it's not $,.

sh*t!

We could steal it.
No, we can't.

Could we?
(DOOR CLOSES)

No, he'll know. He'll know.
Doesn't matter.

We destroy the evidence,
deny it ever existed.

His word against ours.

A couple of your mates
have turned up.

Eat it.
No!

I read about it.
What?!

Consumption of evidence -
best way to get rid of anything.

No, I... I...

Quick! They're coming!

Hey!
(GRUNTS)

Do you want a glass of water, mate?
It's pretty hot in here.

(GRUNTS)

Where's the cheque?
What cheque?

Yeah, that's what I'm here to sort.

I wrote you a cheque
for grand last night.

No, you didn't.
Yeah, I did.

You wanted to spot me four grand.

But you never did,
so, really, I owe you .

True.

(MUFFLED) No.
What?

What if there WASN'T
a poker match last night?

What if you don't owe him anything?

What are you talking about?
(SWALLOWS)

OK, where is the cheque?

Look, I like
to clear my debts, so...

.. grand.

All yours.
Just get rid of the one for .

OK, where's my magnet?
(STOMACH RUMBLES)

The little Opera House?

It was a souvenir.
(GULPS)

Daddy, are we late?
Mm-hm.

Oh, sh... Come on.

(GRUNTS)

Quickly! Off you go!

Oh, I can definitely feel it.

I've got chest pain.

Why did you swallow the magnet?

I didn't do it on purpose!
It just went down with the cheque!

Oh, it's probably... lodged
in my... oesophageal sphincter.

Your what?!

I've got a mildly defective
lower oesophageal sphincter.

I get a lot of heartburn.
What were you thinking?

It was a high-pressure situation!

You could be a little bit grateful!
I did it for you!

Then you go and write him
another bloody cheque!

Well, I'm paying him back!
(GROANS)

Quick, hurry up, darling.
(GROANS)

You're late, too.
What's your reason?

I've been experimenting
with gluten-free slice options.

You what?
(GROANS)

What's up with him?

I've got a little bit of the
Opera House sticking into my heart.

Where is he? He knows
I'm stressing about this scan.

Well, have you tried calling him?
No answer.

I told him to meet me here
and we'd go up to imaging together.

We have three minutes.
Oh.

OK, look, I'll call Lewis.

Psst! Gemma.
We've got a bit of a situation.

What...?

Hey.

(GRUNTS)
What's happening?

He swallowed the Opera House.

He what?
A magnet.

He made me do it.
For Justin - not me.

I never asked him.
They didn't want Dr Albert to see.

Can you go and get her,
please, Maddie?

No, no, don't.
She's worried about the scan.

I'll be fine. I'll be fine.

OK, where does it hurt?
Here.

Right. And just one magnet?

Yeah.
Not the Harbour Bridge as well?

'Cause if there's two magnets,
they can join,

and they can perforate
your intestine.

No, just the one.

Oh. Don't worry -
I just... I'm... I'm fine.

I... I'm... I'm breathing through it.

We'll get to the scan.

He swallowed the Opera House.

A magnet.

He says he can feel it in his chest.
How big was it?

It was wrapped in a cheque.
He swallowed that, too.

(GRUNTS)
Sorry to interrupt.

It's just, there's someone
looking for you, Gemma.

Lucy? What are you doing here?

Um, no, nothing.
I'm just looking for Gemma.

Lucy?

Are you alright?
You look like you've been crying.

No. I'm OK. Um...

Just got sacked.

Oh...

How did they find out?

My boss tricked me
into confiding in her.

I told her that I had
a little brush with the law,

then she smiled at me...
and fired me.

Apparently, I'm not a good fit
for William Garrett Barker's brand.

They sound mean. You're probably
better off out of there.

Shut up, Kane.

How long does an X-ray take?

The good news is
that the Opera House

is nowhere near your chest
or your heart.

It's here.
In your stomach.

So those chest pains you're feeling
are completely normal. It's stress.

I thought it might of, um...
had a little bit of trouble

passing through
my oesophageal sphincter.

It's mildly defective.

I get... I get a little, um... I get
a little... little bit of heartburn.

Your oesophageal sphincter has...
has risen to the occasion.

It has passed the foreign object
through your oesophagus -

- see?
- And into your stomach.

Mmm.

I mean, there's no need to panic.

The next sphincter
that it has to... pass through

is gonna be the... tricky one.

Mmm. But you'll be fine.
You will.

Look, there might be a bit
of an issue with the jagged edges.

You know, the sails are gonna...

..give you a little bit of grief
on the way through.

Although, it is presenting
in the right way,

with the uncomfortable edges
to the side,

making the passage
as smooth as can be.

Are you laughing?
No! (LAUGHS)

(CHUCKLES) Absolutely not. No.

Uh-uh.

And, um...

..when?

When will it...

..pass?

It's hard to predict
these sort of things.

It's just... it'll come
when it's ready.

Try to keep busy -
take your mind off it.

You know, we, um...
we missed your scan.

Mmm.

I made another appointment
for tomorrow afternoon.

It should have passed by then.

I feel responsible.

I told him to eat it.

It's not your fault.

OK, mate, I got it.

I stuffed up - Mark, Simon,

the house, all of you.

Good thing I'll be gone soon.

There's a building initiative
up near Albury.

They're offering apprenticeships
and accommodation for families.

You're leaving?

I don't want to talk about it.

Gets cold in Albury.

There are other ways you could
pay the debt without selling.

I mean, we could help.

Obviously... not by
ingesting something.

You know, other ways.

It's not the debt -
it's... it's a fresh start.

It's a really good
opportunity, and...

..I'll get my apprenticeship,
earn decent money,

plenty of room for the kids.

Have you told THEM that?

I will when I pick them up
from their grandparents tonight.

Hey, there's a couple of things
I've gotta do in the city.

Can you, um... drop me off
up here at the tram stop?

Fine.

What?

Didn't think you were
the running away type, that's all.

I'm not running away.

I'm moving on.

Fixing my mess before I go.

Ex... excuse me.

Excuse me, sir. You really
need to have an appointment.

Sir.

This is a waste of the court's time,
not to mention mine.

No. No, I'm not interested
in doing that.

You have to give her another go.
I'll call you back.

Sorry - who?
I tried to stop him.

Lucy. Lucy Crabb.
And who are you?

Yeah, you can't sack her -
it wasn't her fault.

I made her steal the car.
She was only trying to help.

What are you doing in my office?

Lucy is the smartest person I know,
with the biggest heart.

You could do with
some of that around here.

You need to leave.

That your son?
Excuse me - what are you doing?

What's his name?
Sorry?

Uh... Hugo.

Hugo.

"Dear Hugo, play hard,
never give up. Justin..."

"Baynie." Justin Baynie.

I don't get it.
Your son will.

Here. My number.

Maybe I can practise
with his team sometime,

kick a ball around with his mates.

If...

..you give Lucy another go.

No mayo?

Eat your sandwich,
and don't complain.

Hey, I am not complaining.
This is awesome.

Can you bring me lunch every day?

Oi! No pashing in the playground.

We don't have that rule here.

I gotta tell you something.

I lost my job.

Justin got in
this poker game last night

and he lost a lot of money.

And then he was about to, like,
get in a car to lose more,

and so I stole it.

Sorry?

And then Justin tried to kiss me,
and I didn't return the kiss,

and he retracted it later

so, strictly speaking,
it almost didn't happen.

Then I got arrested.
Well, I got charged.

And I told my boss.

Oh. Well, at least you were
honest with your boss.

Well, I was going to tell you.
Yeah.

I just didn't know
how to explain it.

It was dumb of me to help him.
(PHONE RINGS)

It's the firm.

Answer it.

Hello?

OK.

Yeah. Of course.

I'll be in there as soon as I can.

(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)

They're gonna give me another sh*t.

They want me back in there
this afternoon.

Harry?

I should get back to class.

PHOEBE: Hey!

Are you coming to the tute?

Returning these.
I'm dropping out, Pheebs.

Why? You did so well in maths.

I didn't go to the exam.

OK, don't be mad.

I sat it for you.

It's all sorted.
I'm gonna sit it next year.

You what?!

Why would you do this?
I don't know.

You were so hell-bent
on stuffing up your life,

I thought I'd try and un-stuff it.

What, and fail yourself?
Ugh.

Do you know how angry
your old man is with me right now?

I'm trying to fix everything I've
done to piss him off, and you...

Why do you care so much
about what Dad thinks?

Hi.
Hi.

Yeah, uh, she accidentally wrote
her student number on my exam,

and I passed,
even though I wasn't there,

but she failed.

You see, my baby was sick.

Yeah. Tonsillitis.

And, um, she had no sleep -
you know, fuzzy head -

and got to the exams next day,
and muddled up the, um...

The student number.
..student numbers.

Yeah. Yeah.

Have you got a medical certificate?

Who for?
The baby.

That's the excuse
you're using, right?

Right. Yeah.
Right. Yeah.

Where are we gonna get
a medical certificate?

Leave it with me.

Are you really going away?

Yeah.

Is it because of Lucy?

It's for a whole bunch of reasons.

I'll hate your guts if you go.

Oh, tell me what you really think.

Mm-hm.
Really?

You and Ryan
aren't together anymore?

We're... not exclusive.

He's still freaked out
about the whole baby thing, and...

..he doesn't want
anything too serious.

I gotta get to my tute.

You need to come with me.
Aargh!

What are you... what are you doing?!

Aargh!

You could live to be and search
every country in the world,

and you will never meet
a girl like Phoebe.

Do you understand?
I know.

You don't like babies?
I like babies.

So what's the problem, then?
I tried to talk to it, OK?

But it hates me.

You're afraid of Jem.

Look, he could be hours.
Look, I... I'm staying, OK?

You and Lewis can give up.

I'm not letting him
sell this house -

not when I slaved to build it.

Swallowed a...
national icon to save it.

(CAR APPROACHES)

Hey.

Are you here for Justin?

Uh, he gave me a key.
We have an inspection.

Oh, great.
Well, you can let us in.

Uh, we're, um... we're the builders.

The, uh... ceiling medallion?

Yeah, we got locked out.

Just having a, uh... smoko.

So, there's three bedrooms -
two here and one down the back.

High ceilings
and polished floorboards throughout.

Yeah, this is where we got rid
of all the asbestos, all here.

Yep - got rid of that when we
demolished the structural wall.

Yep, nah, it's looking pretty good.
We fixed it.

But, uh, yeah, most of the termites
gone now - it's good.

Do you mind leaving us?

I'll show you the bathroom -
this way.

Did we discover the asbestos
the day we burst the water main?

OK, we get what you're doing.

You're not builders - look at you.

You're a couple.

We're not.

And you want to buy this place,

so you're trying
to scare off the competition.

Well, it's not gonna work with us.

We're ready to make an offer.

We've got our finances organised.
Have you?

That's all I need to know
for the medical certificate.

Don't tell me anything dodgy.

Hey, sorry
you missed your ultrasound.

Oh, it's fine.

Yeah, I remember Nicola
stressing before hers.

You know, the moment you see that
little baby on the screen, it's...

I'm not really helping, am I?

Actually, you are.

What is that?

Ugh, some weird
modern art Mark bought.

I like it.

Really?

Yeah.

Hey, uh, we found, um...

Ryan.
..waiting out the front.

Yeah, he's with me.

We're going to mothers' group,
aren't we, mate?

Yeah.

Oh, right.
Well, we'll come, too.

I mean, it'll be... be good to talk.

Um... I don't need to talk.

Well, we'll come to mothers' group
anyway - it'll be fun.

Really?

Seconds, anyone?
Yeah, me. It's delicious.

I've got some gluten-free for you.

Would you look at this man?

He can knock up a gluten-free slice
AND fix a pergola.

Oh, that reminds me, Lewis -

um, Carolyn needs you
to look at her side gate.

Righto.
JUSTIN: Hi, everyone.

Uh, I'm Justin.

This is Ryan.

He's a mate of Jem's, and, uh...

..he wants to get to know him
better, so he's come along.

Great! Welcome, Ryan.

Hi, Mr Crabb.

MARK: Hi. Um...

I'm Mark.

And...
Kane.

Yeah, we're, uh...
we're quite close to Jem, too,

so we thought we'd, um, come along.

That's nice,
that you want to be involved.

You're a bit like godparents,
are you?

Oh. Well, yeah, sort of.

You're together?

No. No, we're... we're not a couple.

Uh, no. No.

Hey, is anyone else trying to wean?

Because I'm just at that point
where I'm like,

"Can I please have my boobs
back to myself now?"

Fair enough.

Sorry.

I'll just listen.

Um, try some slice.
It's date and walnut.

Date? No, I... I probably shouldn't.

He swallowed an Opera House.

Doesn't want any sudden movements.

I want to know why HE'S here.

I brought Ryan.

Yeah, and that's good, Ryan.

He wants to get involved -
that's great.

But you're not part of Jem's life.
You're leaving, aren't you?

He's selling the house.
We just met the buyers.

Look, we don't want
to ambush you mate, but...
Well, you are.

You won't talk to us!

We built that house with you.

Yeah, for Nicola.
For ALL of you.

We get that it's not
just about the money

and you want a new start, but...

You know what, Kane?
I don't think you do.

Excuse me - I gotta go.

Thank you so much - you won't regret
giving me another go.

Is that the Hookware matter?
Mm-hm.

Scan them
for any incon... sistencies.

Hi.

Gaby, this is my fiance, Harry.

Not the guy that was in here before?

Who?

Um, Baynie, Jason.
Justin.

I swear, I had no idea that he...

I don't care about Justin.

The only time we fight
is when we focus on him.

I don't care what he does
or what he thinks or what he wants.

I care what you want.

That's all.

They're gorgeous.

They're yours.

Hey, um...

..I've got a ticket
round the world.

You don't want to spend your
holidays doing an internship here.

You will die of boredom.
No offence.

You're coming with me.

There's a stopover in Vegas...

..and we're gonna get hitched.

('NEVER SEEN SUCH GOOD THINGS'
BY DEVENDRA BARNHART PLAYS)

SONG: ♪ Never seen such good things
go so wrong

♪ And everywhere we turn,
they're playing our song

♪ (HUMS) Mm-mm-mm, mm-mm-mm

♪ Should've known
someone so much like me

♪ Would give me hell
and send me to my knees... ♪

I know it's sad to leave.

But there's big backyards in Albury.
Big enough to play footy.

Alright.

Hey, I said no textas
on the covers, remember?

But it's for Mr Tuck.

We're getting a certificate
at graduation tomorrow.

That's because you've finished
your first year of school

and we're very proud.

He needs one too.

He never gets cross.

And when Mummy was gone
and you forgot our lunch...

Yeah?
..he gave me his.

Do you think he'll like it?

(CALL TONE RINGS)

LUCY: (OVER PHONE) Hi,
am I interrupting anything or...?

No.

I'm going away.

OK.

Just for a bit.

I just didn't want to leave things,
um...

..you know, I just didn't want
to leave with us fighting.

Well, uh... are we fighting?

I think so.

But I think that you had something
to do with me getting my job back.

So we should probably call it quits.

Right.

Well, I should... I've got
this dinner thing so...

Sure.

Yep.

Lucy.
Yeah.

He's a good guy...

..Mr Tuck. Harry.

He'll make you happy.

Thanks.

Phew.

You're late.
Sorry.

That's OK, we've only just sat down.

Peekaboo!

Mm, veal schnitzel.

Is there some reason she's trying
to put me in a good mood?

No.
No.
No.

Well, actually, we have some news.

You know how you're always saying

that people spend
way too much money on weddings

and, you know,
there's no need to have

thousands of people
on the guest list

or people riding in on elephants.

You want elephants?

We're eloping tomorrow.

We're gonna get married in Vegas.

And, um, also no big deal
but Ryan's moving in with us.

To be closer to Jem.

And me, but mainly Jem.

We're really bonded, Mr Crabb.

Turns out we like the same music
and everything, don't we?

Eh? (CHUCKLES)

(BABY GURGLES)

Hi.

I hope this is cool, Dad.

I'd really wanted you
to give me away.

We can have a party
when we get back.

It's OK, darling.

I don't mind.

But I have to say one thing, Lucy.

I've been married three times...

..and only once to the right person.

Harry is the right person, Dad.

He's sweet and kind and...

There was another guy

but he will never be able
to get over what he went through.

I can't hope for something
that might never happen,

not when Harry is something
that can.

Welcome, everyone,
to prep graduation.

It's a big day for all of us.

Now, before we start the
presentation of diplomas,

just take a moment to look

at all the models
that your children have made.

There's lots of personal bests
on display.

OK, run ahead and show me.

We don't have one.

What?
Stella's model.

She couldn't think of a single thing
she learnt all year.

I told her, you don't
have to have liked it...

We did it - this morning when you
were setting up. It's all good.

She thought of something?
Mm.

Here it is, my diorama.

Is that a washing up glove?

Yep, from the kitchen.

I struggle with my sight words,

and I'm sorry I'm not
a very good reader.

It's OK.
Especially big words.

Big words are hard.
But I learnt to click.

See, it says 'click'.
That's not how you spell...

Oh, yeah.
That... that totally says click.

It's great.
Do you like it?

It's the best diorama ever.

Jacob taught me.

What?

To click. Jacob taught me.

It takes a pretty good friend
to teach you how to click.

Yeah.

TUCK: Yeah.

Hey, Zac, have you showed
your dad your model yet?

He's been keeping it a secret.
Yeah, he's pretty excited.

Here's the door. It's our house.

"This year I learnt
to build a house with Dad."

Mine's better. I made a castle.
Hey.

Oh, that's...

OK, everyone,

we're gonna start the presentation
in just a couple of minutes.

Hey, where's Mark?

(GROANS) Arrgh!

Well, the good news is,
it's almost out.

The bad news is, it's a breach.

That's what's making it
so challenging.

(MUTTERS, GROANS)

I need dr*gs.

I need some, like, serious dr*gs.

Just...

Painkillers will only
slow things down.

You can do this naturally, sweetie.

Just breathe through the pain,
remember?

(APPLAUSE)

This next Diploma of Prep
goes to the child

that's kept us all organised
this year - Matilda Crabb.

This one goes to our record holder

in the under-six sack race,
Jacob Baynie.

Yeah!
Well done, mate.

And this diploma goes
to his brother, Zachary Baynie.

Now, he's had a big year
this year, Zac,

and he has risen to the challenge.

There you go.
What, is that for me?

Nice one, Zac. Thanks, Zac.
Thanks, mate.

OK, this next diploma
is a very special one,

because this little girl
has practised

harder than anyone on her
reading, Stella Parker.

(CHEERING, APPLAUSE)
Well done.

And last of all, our smallest,

but certainly not our quietest
class member,

Poppy Oliver.

Uh, Poppy?

And a huge round of applause
for all your children.

Hey. Where've you been?

No.
Yeah.

How'd it go?
Two stitches.

Worth it, though.
Tough.

Yeah, excuse me, I've got to...

I've, um...

I'd like to return something.
Um, now, look...

This belongs to you.
So you've got your money.

If you wanted to inflict pain,
it worked,

because it was quite
a difficult passage.

Now, if you could just
leave Justin alone.

Thank you.

Nice house. Solid foundations.

Yeah.

Hey, uh, I was serious

when I said we'd come up with other
ways to pay back that cash.

Yeah.

The list of mums
from the mothers' group.

They all need a side fence
or a pergola or a door mended.

Plenty of work round here.

You can get jobs
through the school, too.

'Cause you're a handyman,
you don't need a licence.

Till you get cracking, I could spot
you a loan just to tide you over.

Mate, I appreciate it but...

..I'm done relying on you
for everything that goes wrong.

I need to stand on my own two feet.

What are we meant to do?

You don't think we rely on you?

Your son taught my daughter
the only thing she learnt this year.

And fixing your house up
probably saved his marriage.

And I stood up to Simon Lawson-West.
And he's a pretty big bloke.

I ate his fridge magnet -
that took courage.

You...

..you make us lift our game.

What are you doing?

I'm just gonna need
a little bit of support.

(AIR FIZZLES)

(AIR ESCAPES)

(CLEARS THROAT)

Oh.

Ah, that's...

Hey, this...

..this handyman thing,
you reckon... reckon it could work?

You could limit your jobs
to school hours -

be around for the kids.

Can I use your tools?

I'll think about it.

What about your ute?

Forget it.

Dad, we should get going.

('COUNTING STARS'
BY ONE REPUBLIC PLAYS)

Can we stay here till I'm ?
Yep.

Until I'm ?
Maybe.

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

Hey, uh, wash your hands,
I'll make you a snack.

Hi.

Hi.
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