03x02 - Omega Beaver/Bite This!

[bunniefuu]

[ Lively dance music playing]

♪ A-a-a-angry beavers

♪ Beavers.

[ Wind howling]

[ Typewriter bell dings]

Are you sure they're coming?

I didn't see anything out there.

The howler leeches are coming.

[ Screams]: ooh! What should I do?

[ Loud slap, daggett screams]

Send more money-- I'll send more stuff.

[ Loud chomp]

I'm your only friend.

That's right.

You aremy only friend.

Ever since that terrible day--

The day that I became...

The last beaver on earth!

[ Glass shatters]

Huh?

[ Door slams]

[ Jackhammer rumbling]

[ Glass shatters]

[ Rumbling and tapping]

[ Banging and whirring]

[ Norbert grunting]

[ Grunting and groaning]

[ Pounding, then glass shatters, norbert moans]

[ Drill whirs]

[ Metal clanking]

[ Squeaking]

[ Doused flame hisses]

[ Grumbling]

[ Crash]

Daggett!

[ Gasps]: ooh, la-di-da, la-di-da.

Nothing to see here.

Daguerreotype!

All this construction work

Is making it hard for me

To continue with my philately.

Eh?stamp collecting.

What's under that sheet?

Um, uh, eh...

It's an army of giant robot beavers--

Some assembly required.

[ Slap]

Quick, forget I said that.

"From: konspiracy komics, to: daggett."

Dag, you people-hated buffoon!

What did you buy this time?

The giant, snow-dwelling alien mutant howler leeches!

I know that look, norbie.

I'm not crazy.

I've got proof!

Look at this.

"Konspiracy komics presents..."

[ Hums fanfare]

"The att*ck of the howler leeches.

"All stories guaranteed to be % true.

"The four stages of the howler leech att*ck.

Stage one: leeches create a new ice age."

Have you looked outside?

[ Wind howling]

"Stage two: howler leeches arrive

In their atomic blood-powered u.f.o.s!"

Atomic blood-powered...

"Stage three!

"Howler leeches swallow all the animals on earth

And digest them over a period of years."

The end...

[ Falls on floor]

For us!

You're taking advice from a comic book?

Not justa comic book, norbie.

Look! I wrote konspiracy komics

And they sent me konspiracy kevin.

Listen to him.

[ Pulls cord]

The howler leeches are coming.

Send more money-- I'll send more stuff.

Ah, now it all becomes clear.

Dag!

[ Crash]

You've been suckered!

Have not!

But, but, but...

Mein dummkopf biber-bruder

There's no such thing

As howler leeches!

[ Rattles and groans]

You've been b*rned by the cruelest burn of all--

A comic book advertisement that only the thane of doofusville

And the king of doofland hereafter would believe.

Okay? There!

I'm done with you.

You know what, mr. Smarty-shorts?

I wish the howler leeches would come and eat you right now.

[ Echoing]: eat you right now.

Eat you right now.

I'm sorry you got eaten, norbie.

Hopefully you're in a better place now, brother.

Well, or at least you will be in years from now

Once the leech finishes digesting you

And spits out your skin bag.

The howler leeches are coming.

[ Daggett screams]

[ Bang]

[ Daggett screams]

James buchanan, our only bachelor president.

Eh?

[ Screams]

Howler leeches!

Ha! My mighty army of robot beavers is working!

Your stinking leeches won't get me!

[ Thudding]

D'oh!

So these leeches can learn.

The howler leeches are coming.

I know that.

What should I do?

Send more money--

I'll send more stuff.

[ Tail snaps, bell rings]

"Anti-leech immobilizing agent."

Hey! This just looks

Like a crate of old stale chewing gum.

"Chew, spit at leeches, rinse, repeat."

Okay.

[ Slurping, chokes]

Oh, a hair!

[ Screams]

Oh, no!

Big bunny!

The leeches swallowed you

And you're still being digested.

Oh, that's so sad.

Oh, barry, not you, too?

Oh, trucky!

Yes!

[ Growling]

[ Growling continues]

Aha!

[ Tapping]

[ Grunting]

Hey!

[ Wind howling]

[ Panting]

[ Crash]

[ Glass shatters]

[ Rumbling]

[ Screams]

The howler leeches are on the roof.

They're coming down the chimney.

What should I do?

Send more money--

I'll send more stuff.

You stupid thing!

You've already got all my money.

Fine, mr. Tightwad, try counting your pennies

After you're leech food, buddy.

[ Gasps]

You "talk-ed."

[ Stammering]: no, I didn't.

Send more money-- I'll send more stuff.

[ Thud]

Okay.

Send more money-- he'll send more stuff.

More money, more money, more money.

Here-- one million dollars!

[ Box crashes]

"Final last-ditch leech protection.

"Do not look inside.

Open with front towards leeches."

[ Kevin laughing, daggett screaming]

[ Thud]

Low voice [ moaning]: daggett!

Now you're going to pay

For sucking up my friends, you spooty leech!

[ Growling]

[ Yells]

Ha! Leech!

Hey, you get yours.

Norbert: daggett, ahh! It's me-- norb!

I'm not a howler leech.

Me and the guys just played a trick...

[ Screams] on you.

Oh, that's...

You sound just like my brother norb usedto.

[ Wind howling]

[ Growling]

[ Growling and thrashing]

Low voice: get us out of here! Come on!

[ Screaming, growling and thrashing continue]

[ Wind howling]

Daggett: norbie, norbie, norbie!

I thought you were gone away forever and ever.

Dag, I'd only been gone minutes.

Oh, well it seemed like forever and ever!

It wasn't long enough for me.

Eh?nothing.

We better check on our friends.

Daggett: wow, something's wrong with the leeches.

Daggett, you froze our friends!

I did not!

Did, too.

Did not!

Fudgsicles, baby.

Daggett: well, it's their own fault.

Guntag, look at this cute dog.

Oh, you're so cute, yes, you are.

[ Cooing]: cute doggie.

Can I keep him? Huh? Can i? Huh? Huh?

[ Loud blast, creatures screaming]

Whee!

♪ La, la, la, mm, la, la, mm, la, la, mm, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, mm, la, la, mm, la, la, mm, la. ♪

Oh...

[ Chomping loudly]

Mmm... First chew of the day.

Daggett: norbie, wake up!

Norbie!

Nor...

Norbert, what in the name

Of curt jurgin's teutonic petulance are you doing?

Norbie!

[ Chomping]

[ Flatly]: yeow...

Oh, yeow...

[ Screaming in pain]

Wake up!

Wake up!

Wake up!

[ Muttering]

Daggett: spooty... Spoot, spoot, spoot!

Spoot guy!

Hmm?

[ Grumbling]

What the...?

Oh, norbie-orbie.

Do the words "bed-biting" mean anything to you?!

The common, yet embarrassing beaver childhood problem

Of chewing in your sleep?

What's that got to do with me?

Hmm, well, uh, how shall I put this?

You're a little, baby beaver bed biter!

[ Laughing derisively]

A bed biter?

Uh-huh.

Me?

Oh, yeah.

Mr. Hipster?

I don't know about that.

Mr. Snazzy?

Snazzy's a little...

It can't be!

But... It is.

♪ Norbie's a little, baby bed biter ♪

♪ And everybody knows it-- nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. ♪

♪ Little b-b-baby

♪ You ain't seen nothing yet, bed biter! ♪

♪ Norbie's a little, baby bed biter ♪

♪ And everybody knows it-- nah, nah, nah, nah, nah ♪

♪ Nah, nah, nah, little b-b-baby ♪

♪ You ain't seen nothing yet, bed biter! ♪

Norbert: no!

[ In evil voice]: bed biter...

Bed biter...

Bed biter...

Bed biter...

Bed biter...

[ Screaming in horror]

Bed biter!

[ Echoing]: bed biter!

Get a hold of yourself, man!

Slap, slappity, slap... Tickle.

A bed biter, moy?

You mean, "moi"?

It's like a nightmare.

I wish somebody would pinch me and wake me up.

[ Flatly]: yeow.

What'd you do that for?

You said, "I wish somebody would pinch me..."

I was being dramatic.

I don't know why you're so upset.

I do stuff that people laugh at me for all the time.

Sure do.

Why, not too long ago, my dear brother

I, too, was a...

[ Unable to speak]

Bed biter.

Hello, my name is daggett

And I'm a bed biter.

Pretend crowd: hi, daggett.

Thanks, dag-o-lenia.

You really put things in perspective.

You're welcome.

Oh, woe is me!

Now I'm a loser, too!

Got to think.

Use the old super noodle.

Must be some way to b*at this.

That just might work.

Eh?

[ Electronic beeping]

[ Moos]

What is with you and these secret rooms?

Sorry, dag, no time to chat!

Must get to work on the old workshop.

Hey, I'm not a loser-- I mean, this guy...

Spooty secret panel thingy.

Ugh! Spooty cow thingy.

And, voyla!

"Voyla"?

Is she back again?

[ Licking his chops]

Behold, a high-techy bed-biting alarm.

I just put this on

Attach these electrodes to the bed...

Where do you put the quarter in?

I'll show you later.

If I start chewing

It delivers a mildwake-up shock.

Ugh!

Daggett: hello, dr. Smith.

Oh! Indeed!

Oh, please, dr. Smith, I'm not that kind of beaver.

[ Chewing]

[ Electric crash]

[ Norbert and daggett screaming]

[ Groaning]

Oh, no!

My invention failed-d-d.

[ Hacking]

Oh, brother of mine

Would you explain one eensy-weensy thing to me?

If I can.

Why did you shock me, too?!

I should suffer alone?

You know, for a little baby bed biter

You're a real pain in the buttocks.

Back to the old drawing board.

Got to lick this thing.

Got to get back to the old norb cool zone.

[ Moos]

Daggett: you know, norbie

It's really nothing to be ashamed of.

Lots of cool, famous guys were bed biters.

[ Grunting impatiently]

Come on, bossy, get with the moo juice.

Yeow!

I am read-yeah for bed-yeah.

Hmm!

Observe, a little of the old psychology.

Psychology?

Mm-hmm.

Norbert is nota bed biter.

Norbert is nota bed biter.

Norbert is...

Thanks to the little understood--

But always dramatically accepted--

Power of sleep suggestion...

Eh?

I shall conquer my bed-biting.

My problem is solved.

Wish me luck, dag.

This just hasto work.

Hmm, why am I filled

With a sense of portent and dread?

Norbert is not a bed biter.

Norbert is nota bed biter.

Norbert is not a bed biter.

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la... ♪

[ La-la'ing louder]

Norbert is not a bed biter.

Norbert is nota bed biter.

[ Stops la-la'ing]

Norbert is nota...

[ In deep, evil voice]: bed biter.

[ Screaming]

Spooty record.

Norbert is a bed biter.

This isn't good.

[ Chomping]

[ Daggett screaming]

Norbie!

Norbie, wake up!

[ Screaming continues]

[ Growling]

Norbert is a bed biter.

[ Screaming as recording continues]

Stupid thing!

Stupid thing!

Stupid thing!

Norbert is a bed biter.

Norbert is a bed biter.

Norbert is a bed biter.

Norbert is a bed biter.

Norbie!

Norbert is nota bed biter.

Norbert is not...

Mommy...

[ Clunk]

[ Sighs]

[ All shouting angrily]

No...

It's not what you think, brother.

Your new device stopped your problem

But I suffered an unexpected pro-lapse.

You mean relapse?

Work with me on this.

I started bed-biting again--

There, I said it.

I'm a bed biter and I'm proud!

Come on, you guys, laugh at me-- I don't care.

Thank you, dear brother

But I see you're just trying to save me

The embarrassment of admitting

That I'm a bed biter.

But you know what?

I see now that it's nothing to be ashamed of.

Are you with me?

Why, everybody probably does

Something embarrassing sometime.

All: well, uh... Hmm...

Looks like some people have issues.

Come on, brother, let's go home.

Yeah, what's left of it.

[ Whistling " trombones"]

Good night, daggett-o.

Good night, norbie-blah-blah.

[ Groans]

Norbert is nota bed biter.

Norbert is nota bed biter.

Well...

[ Yawning]

Now we can get back to normal.

Norbert is not...

Oh, no!

Oh, no!!

Dag, are you...

Bed wetting?

Yeah, baby.

[ Chuckling]