02x07 - Monteco

[bunniefuu]

Minutes to show, everyone. Minutes to show!

I'm on a loudspeaker.

[Giggles]

Wha...

Oh, man, I'm late.

My alarm didn't go off.

[Alarm going off]

Thanks a lot.

Oh, I fell asleep with my legs all twisted.

Wake up, guys. Come on.

Hey! Help me, man.

My legs fell asleep.

Minutes to show, everyone! Minutes!

Come on, legs, rise and shine.

The show starts in...

Minutes. The show starts in minutes.

Kel, what are you doing? We have a show to do.

Stop playing around!

Come on! You're gonna make us late.

Alisa, help me, help me. My legs fell asleep.

Kel, stop!

Seriously, kel, this is no time to be playing games!

Minutes! Minutes to show, everyone.

Kel, hurry up!

Kel?

Kel! Anybody here?

You here, buddy?

He must be on stage already.

Hey, kel.

Hey, katrina. Ugh!

Just go on without me. I can't move my legs.

They fell asleep.

Well, I just wanted to tell you

That you have a couple of fans out here who wanted to meet you.

Huh?

Hello. How are you doing?

Oh, well. Let's go.

Wait. Hold on.

Where you going? Where you going?

Oh! Oh! Oh!

I'd do anything for the fans.

Especially the ladies.

Fresh out the box.

Stop, look, and watch.

Ready yet? Get set.

It'sall that.

♪ Oh

♪ Uh-oh

♪ This is all that♪

♪ This is all that♪

♪ Check it, check it

♪ Now, this is just an introduction ♪

♪ Before we blow your mind ♪

♪ The show is all of that ♪

♪ And yes, we do it all the time ♪

♪ So sit your booty on the floor ♪

♪ Or in a chair

♪ On the ground or in the air ♪

♪ Just don't go nowhere

♪ 'Cause everything we do

♪ Is all of that

♪ We're entertaining you

♪ We're all of that

♪ My posse and my crew

♪ Is all of that

♪ So sit still

♪ 'Cause we're comin' right back ♪

♪ Oh

♪ Uh-oh

♪ This is all that♪

♪ This is all that♪

♪ Check it out

♪ Oh

♪ Uh-oh

♪ This is all that♪

♪ This is all that♪♪

Hi, I'm okrah.

Our topic today, kids out of control.

Let's bring out our first guest.

His name is robert davis from washington.

Well--well, I guess I don't have to tell you robert's problem.

Robert, tell us all about it.

Well, okrah, I just can't seem to stop throwing stuff.

I feel the hurt.

How long has this been going on?

Well, since I was in the fifth grade.

And when did you realize that...

Sorry! Just can't seem to stop throwing stuff.

It's all right, robert. We understand.

You see, people like robert have the...

[Microphone squeaks]

Thank you.

Our next guest is danny sofero. Danny?

Hi, okrah.

How are you doing?

Now, danny, I understand you have a problem...

Aahhh!

Now, danny, I can't help but notice

You screamed in my ear.

Th-that's right, okrah.

You see, I'm a screamer.

I love to scream.

I scream all the time.

Oh, I feel the hurt.

And has this hollering created problems for you?

Aaaahhh!

I'm a screamer. I scream.

Our next guest is kathy weiner. Kathy?

Now, kathy, I understand you have a problem known as "eat-a-lotsy",

Which means you eat things that shouldn't be eaten.

Is that true?

Thank you.

Uh--now, how long have you had this problem?

Uh-uh. See, that's my fern, girl.

You get off my fern.

Oh! Oh! Can I have a bandage?

Now would be a good time to take some questions from our studio audience.

Yes. You, sir.

Yeah. I've got a question for the boy who throws things.

When did you first realize--ooh!

Can I get my chair back, please?

Yes. You, ma'am.

Hi, okrah. I have a question for the young man who screams.

Danny, do you have a problem with...

Aahh!

Whoo! I heard that. Ooh.

I'm a screamer.

Yes. You, sir.

Hi there, okrah. Love the show.

Oh, thank you.

I just wanted to congratulate the girl

Who eats the non-food products.

I think it's great you have the courage to come out here

And admit your problem.

You know, thanks to you,

I, too, can now admit that...

Oh!

Whoo!

I feel the hurt.

Now, I know many of you are thinking...

Aaahhhh!

Many of you are thinking that kids like this

Cannot grow up to be achievers.

But I'm here to tell you that they can.

And to prove it, I brought my special friend

And my guest, roseanne.

Hiya, okrah.

I gotta a little rash.

Now, roseanne, I understand when you were a child

You had a problem that you could not control. Is that true?

Yeah, that's right, okrah.

I used to have karate-osis.

Oh. And what's karate-osis?

Aye!

Ahhhh!

After our break, we can...

Whoa!

Oh, I feel the hurt!

And now, lori beth denberg with more vital information

For your everyday life.

When someone asks you what you had for lunch,

You'll sound weird if you say

"Hey, what I eat for lunch is between me and my sweet tummy!

Now back off!"

If you're taking a bath and your cat jumps in the tub with you...

[Phone rings]

What?

Look, I'm right in the middle of vital information.

Well...

Can't it wait?

I'm right in the middle of...

All right. Hold on.

Just a sec.

Thanks.

Yeah, yeah.

If you're on television giving out vital information

And your phone rings,

Don't answer it.

This has been lori beth denberg with vital information.

[Hard rock music]

Yay!

Thank you! The name of the band is bacteria!

My name is maggot!

On drums, spew!

On bass guitar, rash!

This next song is off our new cd entitled

Raw sewage.

This one's called

Blob!

, , , .

[Shouting lyrics]

Whoa!

I think we blew the amplifier.

We're going to have to cancel the show.

[Audience chanting] bacteria, bacteria!

People, I'm sorry,

But it looks like we've blown an amplifier.

So, we're gonna have to cancel the show.

Go home!

Boo!

Oh!

Man, I'm bumming, homes.

But what can we do?

We can't get the amp fixed this late at night.

[Falling sound]

Out of the way!

What the blazes was that?

That was me!

Dude, you trashed my drums!

No problem!

'Fraid so!

Who are you, guy?

I am...

Repairman-man-man...!

Dude, you trashed my drums.

You're a repairman?

I am therepairman! I can repair anything!

How about repairing my drums?

No!

Wait, wait!

Can you repair our blown amplifier?

Blown amp! That's not even a challenge for...

Repairman-man-man...

Why do you keep doing that?

What?

That! Saying man-man-man over and over again

Like some kind of pretend echo.

Never mind. There's a broken amp that needs to be repaired,

And repair it I will! Stand back.

Dude, that's not helping!

Look what you've done!

That amp won't be giving you a lump of trouble anymore!

I guess not. You crunched it!

You're a dube!

Nuh-uh! I'm repairman-man-man...

Again with the echo.

Dude, you are so not a repairman, man!

Man! Man!

That guitar looks a wee bit out of tune.

What are you, a freak? Listen!

[Plays hard rock music]

I can repair that.

No, no!

Look out, dudes!

He's loony! Somebody call security!

My guitar!

That guitar won't be out of tune anymore.

It's not a guitar anymore.

Who cares, dude? The audience loves it!

[Audience chanting] repairman, repairman, repairman!

Quick, dude, repair something else.

Don't mind if I do.

[Audience cheering]

Wait!

[Silence]

[Echo sound] man-man-man-man!

Repairman-man-man...

And now,all that presents a semi-educational moment.

Everyday french with pierre escargot.

[Speaking french]

Ho ho ho ho!

[Speaking french]

Ho ho ho ho ho!

[Speaking french]

Ho ho ho ho ho!

Yeah. I bought this camera at your department store yesterday,

And it doesn't work.

The department store doesn't work?

No, the camera doesn't work.

And what's your complaint?

The camera is broken.

You see, you hit the button, the flash goes off,

But it doesn't take a picture.

Oh!

You know, I've been working at this counter for a long time

And I still don't understand why people buy broken things.

I didn't know it was broken when I bought it.

I just want to return it.

Why?

Why?

Because it's broken.

Don't do that.

Smile! Say cheese!

Don't do that. Give me that!

I'd rather keep this broken camera than deal with the likes of you, screwy!

Enjoy your camera!

Screwy!

Yeah, I ordered a bowling ball from this department store,

And you people accidentally sent me this bowl instead.

And do you have a complaint?

Yeah.

Don't you see me standing here...

Complaining-- about the bowl!

Is something wrong with the bowl?

No!

Next.

No, wait a minute here!

I wanted a bowling ball.

I got no use for this bowl.

Peanuts!

Why'd you say "peanuts"?

You can fill the bowl with peanuts!

Terrific.

But I just want the bowling ball.

Hat.

I don't wanna put a bowl on my head

And say it's a hat when it's a bowl!

You can put fruit in a bowl.

Look, I'm aware that there are a variety of uses for this bowl,

But I just want my bowling ball!

But you can't eat cereal out of a bowling ball.

For cryin' out loud!

Did somebody knock you in the head or what?

I wanna talk to someone else.

You could talk to her.

She's a customer!

She don't know what's going on!

Where do I go to complain about you?

Boy, what a day.

People just keep coming up here to complain about things.

Complaints, complaints, complaints.

Well, this is the complaint department.

Hat!

Yes, that's a nice hat.

Anyway, we bought this good burger ed doll,

And ed's supposed to say different good burger phrases

When you pull his string,

Like "welcome to good burger, home of the good burger,

Can I take your order?"

"Would you like good fries with that?"

Things like that.

But this ed just keeps repeating the same phrase over and over.

Doll: uh-no. Uh-no.

Uh-no.

See, it repeats the same thing.

It's supposed to say different stuff.

Uh-no.

Uh-no.

Uh-no.

Stop it.

Uh-no.

Why must you keep doing that?

The ed doll is funny.

Uh-no.

Mommy, make her stop!

Please don't pull that string anymore.

Uh-no.

Uh-no.

You're upsetting everyone!

Just keep the doll!

What's wrong with that lady?

Uh-no.

So, ed, do you have any complaints?

Uh-no.

Hey, clavis! Wake up.

The show's over.

Oh, yeah. Kick it!