03x21 - The Corrupted Currents of This World

[bunniefuu]

Why do you want him
to take the fall?

That'd be pleasing to everyone.

Who are you working for?

He's innocent.
Not to me.

Not Gary Savage.
I'd like to plead guilty.

You know Wolf?

Me and Wolf, we go way back. He'll
be pleased with you today, Jethro.

What would you know, Slippery Jim?

I know a lot about you, Ted.
A lot more than you think.

I don't need a baby's room or any
of this stuff. It's my baby, and
I'm taking care of it my own way.

[ I'm adopting it out.

You know this is
a lawyer's office, right?

Hm?

Not the best place in
the world to skin up.

I'm trying to make sense of it all.

By getting wasted?

It's the only way I can make sense
of it. You know Mum's having this
w*r with Loretta about the adoption?

'It's a completely silent w*r.'

TENSE MUSIC

So it's quiet. What's the downside?

It's freaky, is the downside.
And Mum, she's not saying anything —
not even about Pascalle's new job.

If you insist on showing your tits,
does it have to be with bad
punctuation?

What the f*ck?!
Nungas, as in two tits,
doesn't need an apostrophe.

Unless the bar is owned by
a Mr Nunga, but I highly doubt
that's the case.

Pascalle flopping them
out for a living? So?

It gets worse.

[ KNOCK AT DOOR

It's my ride to work.

Hey, Wests!

Aaron Spiller. So what's
Mum doing about that?

Nothing. That's what I'm saying.

Mum,... I'm not sure Aaron
Spiller's the right kind of—

Pascalle's an adult. Adults make
their own choices around here.

It's like ever since Wayne left,
the only person she's talking to
or listening to is him.

Him?
Well, you know, your mate.

Cheryl,

this roast...

Mmm!
You've outdone yourself.

Why didn't you tell me
he was hanging around?

I just did! ]

Jesus, you can be
thick sometimes, Jethro.

HELLO SAILOR'S 'GUTTER BLACK'

♪ Lying in the gutter,

♪ I cut the cord from my mother.

♪ She pat me on the head and said,

♪ 'Go to sea, boy.
Get to sea, man.'

♪ My luck in the gutter black.

♪ I guess I'm running back...

♪ ...to you.

♪ You in my brain.
You in my heart. ♪

Mm. Mm.

Hi, Mum.

So, what's the big panic?

No panic.

Uh, no. We just wanted
to talk to you.

About Gary.

Yeah, and some other stuff.

Mm-hm. Well, Gary's being supportive
right now. He's a good bloke.

I thought you already
had one of those.

Don't start.

You could fix all that if you
just get off your high horse.

Well, haven't you switched sides?

Well, I could say the same for you.

Listen —

I am not f*cking Gary.

Thank God for that.

But it— it's not just Gary —
there's Pascalle and Loretta.

I'm doing my best. Being ambushed
by you two is not helping.

If you're so worried about this
family, why don't you two do
something? You sort it!

And stay the hell out of my life.

Well, that didn't go how I thought.

Fine. If that's the way
she wants to play it...

What—? We stay out of it?

No, we sort it. You take Pascalle
and Loretta, and I'll deal with
Gary.

OK.
Hey, hang on. How come I
get two things, you get one?

What are you doing here?
I told you there's no work today.

Must have slipped me mind.

It'd be a damn sight easier if you
were still hanging around the house.

Give it up, Ted.
Quitter.

You were there. You saw.

How come I always have to pay?

You're the boss.

Stink one.

MIRIAM CLANCY'S 'FOOL I AM' PLAYS

And I love Echo. Love Echo.

sh*t.

Ladies.

Um, it's my round, isn't it?

♪ I fight it every day. ♪

You big p*ssy! Sit her down,
give her a slap if you have to.

Ted!
Why are you letting
him get away with it?

I'll give you a slap!

He's rotten and you know it.

I can't bloody prove it, can I?

(CHUCKLES) You've been digging!

You could have just asked.

What have you got there?

I told you — nothing.

I'm here now.

Thank Christ for that (!) Criminal
conviction — nothing. If there's any
youth stuff, it's been wiped.

There's nothing in
the bankruptcy lists.

But he's a property developer.

Nothing, nothing, nothing.

He didn't just pop up
like a magic mushroom.

First registered business —
Savage and Shuker Ltd, earth-movers.

Who's this Shuker bloke?
Where do we find him?

I dunno, Ted.
I hadn't got that far.

Well, we better bloody well
get on with it, hadn't we?

Pascalle.
f*ck off!

I'm worried about you.

I'm worried about everyone, but
I'm starting with you. you're next.

f*ck off.
I've got work. Start with her.

Nooo! Aaron Spiller — he's a turd.
You should stay away from him.

Tell me something I don't know.

He's dangerous, Pascalle!

I could snap his spine
just by looking at him.

Look, he's a sleazy little bucket of
sh*t, all right? Stay away from him.

He pays me attention. He talks
to me, even if it is to my tits.

Sweetie, that's just cos
he wants to root you!

Yeah, so?

You go, boy (!) Really told her (!)

Now, you.

You and Mum need to sit down and
have a little chat about this baby.

Van, stay the f*ck out of it.

Well, I'm not finished with you!

Hey, bro. Hey, uh, someone needs
a drain unblocked. Can you do it?

Oh... Nah, man. I've got some stuff
to sort out, eh — real important
stuff.

Me too!

Is it as important
as saving your family?

Bro, what about saving your wedding?

(SIGHS)
OK. That's also important.

It's bad, Van. Real bad.

Did Kasey find out about
that chick you rooted?

Nah, it's all her plans.

Ice sculptures, flower sculptures
and dessert sculptures. Everything!

Ah, and you can't afford it.

Nah, we can afford it. She's getting
this huge bonus from Hoochie Mama.

So, what's the bad stuff?

I just hate everything
about this wedding.

Except her, of course.
And maybe the dessert sculpture.

That did sound pretty cool.

It's just not my wedding, eh?

Well, maybe you should
tell her that, bro.

I can't tell her that.

Yeah.

Hmm...

Hmm...

Oh, man.

Now I've got three things to solve.

Yes, yes. OK, thanks.

Florists, eh? I said yes to
everything just to shut her up.

Well, you'll be needing this, then.

Bonus time?
♪ Bonus time! ♪

Choice!

What's this?
What's what?

I thought we were getting a bonus!

It's money you didn't have before.

Where's the rest?
What rest?

All those invisible parties we never
did, the hard work. The way Gary
talked, I thought we'd get more.

There'll be more, Kase. It
takes time to filter through.

It's not enough.
Jesus, Kase, how much money
do you need for a wedding?

More than this!
Ladies.

What do you want, Van?
It's OK. This'll only take a minute.

Kasey, remind me to have a chat
with you about your flash wedding.

What flash wedding?! There isn't
going to be a f*cking flash wedding!

Kase, calm d—

Huh.
What do you want?

Uh,... Loretta. You know
she's your daughter, right?

Yes.
Mums care about their kids, right?

Shouldn't you be talking to her?
Eh?

She's the one giving her kid away.

OK, but we still need
to talk about Pascalle.

f*ck off, Van.

CHARLIE ASH'S 'AH HA' PLAYS

Pascalle, I'm sensing some
resistance... between us, which
is a problem for me.

Not as much as you are for me.

But I've told my lads
we're going round.

Going round? Where are you from?
And I haven't, like, 'gone round'
with anyone since primary school.

What if I paid you?

Do I look like a hooker?

Well, I'm not! And even if I
was, I wouldn't hook with you!

OK, what if I paid you just
to go around with me? bucks.

How does that work?

Be beside me with my lads.

How many times?

Two?

I'm not telling them
that I've rooted you.

How about if everybody thinks
you have and you don't deny it?

.
Ha ha! Deal! Hee, hee, hee!
And I would have gone to five!

Five then.

Oh, OK.
And cash upfront.

Baby, hey I know you are
a woman of your word, so...

Yeah, I am and the word is if
you even lay a finger on me,

I'm gonna stick that finger so
far up your nose it's gonna, like,
you know, get stuck in your brain.

What the hell's this?

He's giving me money, Van.
What does it look like?

OK, love to stay, gotta play.

And uh, you and I, baby doll, we'll
be making sweet music later on. Aow!
(CHUCKLES)

OK. Bye.

Pascalle, I know your life's
sh*t, but Aaron Spiller?

Yes, Van, my lifeisshit.
What's it to you?

What's it to me? It means heaps
to me because you're my— you're my
sister and... and I...

and I— because...

You're my sister,
you know, and that—

I really... Yeah...

That means... That—
That means a lot to me.

That I can be— Sister, you know...

And— there's— so much I wanna...
Oh, piss off, Van!

...do for you. But Pascalle!

I'll get a flight back today.

Wouldn't it be easy
just to phone this guy?

Uh, he's not that
available. He's inside.

Oh, is it an appeal?

Nah, it's just family stuff.
Corky used to be our lawyer.

Franklin Cork?

Yeah. You know him?

Only through Gary. Has this
got anything to do with Gary?

It's some sh*t I've gotta sort out.

If it involves Gary, leaving
sh*t alone is the better option.

And you still work for him.

Yeah, yeah. Everyone's
afraid of the big bad Gary.

How do you know Corky?

Used to come round the house looking
for money. They'd go off into this
huddle.

I guess he was one of
Gary's lawyer monkey boys.

Right, well, Gary isn't
Corky's favourite person.

I want to know why.
Huh! Sss!

What's this to do with your family?

There are... connections.

Your mum.

She doesn't seem to
get what a prick he is.

Huh! Gary doesn't like people
digging around in his past.

Uh-huh.
KEYS JANGLE

All the more reason to dig.

Hey, bro.
Oh, hey. Uh, how's it going?

Ohh, mostly bad, but there is
one bit of good, which is good.

Just get a beer, thanks.

What's the bad?
Don't you wanna to hear the good?

Nah, it's best to start with the
bad. That way you end on a smile.

All right. Well,
the bad is that, uh,

Mum is, uh, totally refusing
to talk to me about Loretta.

And Pascalle,... (SCOFFS) I'm pretty
sure she's now charging for it.

You mean, like, sex?
Yep. She's on the game.

Wow. Not entirely
unexpected, but still wow.

The good is that you don't have
to worry about your flash wedding,
cos won't be one.

Cos apparently there's not
enough money to pay for it.

Eh? Kasey'll be gutted!

She didn't seemtoohappy.

sh*t, man! Why didn't
you tell me that first?!

Because you said to save the good!

Oh!

PHONE RINGS

Yeah. What?
I'm just checking on
the happiness levels.

Not that high right now.
Well, it's bonus day.

Not bonus enough for some people.
Kasey buggered off in tears.

Oh, Jeez. It's early days, Cheryl.
How much was she expecting?

Don't worry, I'll deal with it.

That girl of yours come
to her senses yet?

Which one?

Loretta.

No. Van's on the case.

OK, but if she won't
listen to you, then—

I don't know anything any more.

You know, Loretta's
not a normal person.

And who knows — maybe Van is the one
who can make her come to her senses.
Miracles have happened.

Yeah, maybe.

Hey, um,... thanks
for taking an interest.

Well, it's more than an interest.
Yeah?

Yeah. Catch you later.

TED: Told you he's a dirty bastard.

That doesn't prove anything.
It proves he's a m*rder*r.

Ted. It's good you're a criminal,

cos you would have made
the most piss-useless cop.

A lot of competition for that.

It only suggests is Leon Shuker was
a useless bastard with some dodgy
mates—

Like Gary bloody Savage!

...who did a runner
because of money.

Or got m*rder*d.

Nothing pins that to Gary Savage.

Just cos the cops couldn't find
the evidence, doesn't mean a thing.

Yes, it does!

Handy having your own earth-moving
equipment for hiding evidence.
(SIGHS) Ted...

We should find out what jobs they
did. I bet Shuker's under some
subdivision in Albany.

How do we prove that? Dig up Albany?

Just cos the cops can't find their
arses from their elbows, doesn't
mean we can't.

All right! All right. We'll...

Find out if his father's
still alive. Start there.

Good boy.

Corky.
Hi. You came all the way
down here just to visit me?

Yep.
Did you drive?

Uh, no, I took a plane.

You must have driven
from the airport.

Yeah. No, I rented a car.

I hear it a beautiful drive.
I wouldn't know. I drove down here
in the back of a prison van.

Hawke's Bay is beautiful,
apparently.
Mm. It is.

If had a competition to see
who could find dr*gs the quickest,
right — ready, steady, go — I'd win.

Look, um, Corky, I got a plane
to catch, mate. And, um,...

I need to talk to
you about Gary Savage.

Did he send you?

No. But why are you scared of him?

I'm not scared of him.
He's a top bloke.

OK. So, you were his lawyer?

Never his lawyer — he
was too smart for that.

So, how do you know him?
Well, who wants to know? Gary?

Why would he wanna know
when he already knows?

True. Clever.

Yeah, so, what —
you were in business?

We were more... associates till
he didn't wanna associate with me
any more.

And why was that?
dr*gs — everything in my
life comes back to dr*gs.

Gary doesn't like dr*gs.
Not now.

But then?

Word of advice —

don't... do... dr*gs.

They're a massive amount of fun
at the time, but time doesn't go on
forever.

About Gary—
He's checking up on me.

Well, you can tell him I've
kept my end of the deal.

What deal?

Exactly. You see? I'm on to it. I'm
all over it. You can tell him that.

Corky, did you ever
take money from Wolf?

No, never.

Are you working for Wolf?

No. But someone told me
that you stole from him.

Well, who told you that?
Gary.

Jesus Christ! Why would he tell you
that? Does he want Wolf on to me?

Why would he want that?
I kept my end of the deal.

What deal?
Tell Gary I kept my end of the deal.

What deal, Corky?
I'm not telling.

Corky, why are you scared of Gary?

Why don't you ask your father?

Uh-uh! I'm only gonna say one thing.

Was that it?
What?

Was that what you were gonna say?

I haven't said anything.
Yes, you have.

I haven't— Stop
trying to confuse me!

Stop trying to annoy me.

We had a deal — you said you'd keep
the baby if I didn't top myself.

No, I said I'd have the baby if
you didn't top yourself. No one
mentioned keeping it.

No, that's not fair.

Van, I think you should
worry about Pascalle.

I will help Pascalle and
I will help everyone else—

Oh, look — here's Gary.

Yeah, well, Gary is not my problem.

I need to talk to your sister.
In a minute.

Van, I need you to
f*ck off about now.

Yes, Van. f*ck off.

(SIGHS)

QUIETLY: I don't know why I bother.

Not over.

About that baby of yours.

Why is my baby any
business of yours?

You're not giving it away.

No, I'm not giving, I'm adopting it.

No, you're not.

I think I am, and, being as polite
as I can, it's none of your f*cking
business.

Oh, it's very much my business.

The Sopranos is in the TV section,
if that's what you're aiming for.

As the guarantor of your loan,
I might tell the bank they should
foreclose.

In their business interests.

Business runs better
if I don't have a kid.

I believe in family.

Oh, OK. If we're doing The
Godfather, we're over in classics.

Don't f*ck with me.

I don't need you to guarantee
my loan. You don't scare me.

Suddenly rolling in it, are we?

All I'm saying is whatever
you're pushing, I'm not buying.

So you can join Van and f*ck off.

Hm.

THE BLACK SEEDS 'SO TRUE' PLAYS

Here you go, babe.

I have dreamt of the wedding of
my dreams ever since I was a kid.

Yeah, I know.

But, honey, as long it's
you and me saying 'I do',

I'd be happy to get
married anywhere.

The backyard of the West's house —
that'd do me. It's like my home
anyway.

Yeah, your waewae thing.

My turangawaewae.
It'd be cheap too.

Oh, that's beautiful, baby.
That's a real lovely thought.

But even if I did give up on my
dream, we still need money for food
and booze and flowers,

and what about our
honeymoon in Raro?

Sweet, bro! It's sorted.
Nah!

Yeah! She said it's
a lovely thought.

No, man. She still wants
the wedding of her dreams.

Any great ideas how
that's gonna happen?

Yep — one.

Ooh! I love weddings.

That's good, Lloyd.
I'm a celebrant, actually.

What you do in your spare time is
your business. What about Munter's
loan?

Right. Yes, Of course.

Um, Mr Munter isn't actually here.
No, but I'm here.

And he doesn't bank with us.

Well, once you give
him the loan, he will.

Right. Hm. Um, in the section
marked income, he's left that blank.

That's quite an important
section when it comes to loans.

Right.

Hold on.

Aha.

You see, Lloyd, we're
the Tool Guys, huh.

Cool, eh? Ha ha!

And, uh, part of being a Tool Guy
is, um, what side of the table you
get paid on.

I'm sorry?

Well, you know, there—
there's over-the-table,...

and then there's...

You know?

But if you guys promise
not to talk to the tax guys,

then, uh, he could probably
write a little more.

Look, um, I'm going to have to be
honest with your friend, Mr Munter.

Mm-hm.
If I approve this loan,
I will be fired

and probably never work on the
front line of mobile banking again.
If you need a celebrant...

[ (CLOSES CAR DOOR)

You know the TV show where they look
at old cases? We're like a special
squad.

We're private investigators.

As long as you're not bloody cops.

Not pigs, not us, no way.

We're looking into a connection
with the disappearance of your son.

No, it was m*rder.

Exactly what we're thinking.

My boy was no saint, but it's no
excuse for them not doing their job.

Why didn't they do their job?

Cos they're piss-useless.

Just another drug dealer,
as far as they were concerned.

Was he dealing dr*gs?
That's what they said.

He was in business,
wasn't he? Earth-moving.

A digger and a bulldozer.

This was him and... Gary?

What's he got to do with it?

Sounds like your boy was
hanging with a bad crowd.

You could say that. But not Gary.

Gary was a bloody saint.

Still says hello, slings me
a few dollars here and there.

Done real well for himself, has
Gary. Not like that other weasel.

Which weasel is this?

Frankie. Didn't see him for dust.

Does this Frankie have another name?

Cork. Franklin Cork.

Bloody poncy name for
someone with sh*t for brains.

What are you doing?

We tried phoning, but your message
said you were out of the office.

Yeah. I was on a plane.
What do you want?

Where's Corky?

Why?
Is he still down the line?

Why?

He's an friend of your mate and his
business partner. We'd like to know
what he knows.

Which mate?
Big streak of sh*t, making
like he's the man of the house.

I don't see any other man there.

And he's not my mate. And
Corky won't tell you f*ck all.

I have my ways.

Corky is off the planet,
and he's terrified of Gary.

How do you know?
Where do you think I've been?

Why'd you go down there?

Why don't you guys start by
telling me what led you to Corky?

After you.
After you.

Oh, Jesus, Ted!

Not in my office.

Get 'em out boys! The one with
the biggest donger gets to go first.

Yeah, well, it certainly
won't be you.

I don't care. Someone start talking.

Wolf.

There's some connection to Wolf.

CHARLIE ASH'S "O'BABY" PLAYS

Bro, I'll have another wedding
idea real soon. I promise.

I've gotta do this. And you've
gotta make sure that nothing here
distracts me.

What's gonna distract you?

Well...

Oh, right.

They're everywhere, and it's too
hard to concentrate with all that.

Bro, I got your back and your front.

Piss off!
No, not until you listen to me.

OK.

OK, well, Pascalle,
um, you're beautiful.

Yeah. So?

Well, you're a beautiful woman.

But I mean that in a brother way,
not in a... in a 'hitting on you'
kind of way.

Look, you're too beautiful to—

And special.

Yep, and special, to waste yourself
on a wank-sock like Aaron Spiller.

You think I don't know that?

Then why are you doing it?

Because, Van, sometimes you just
get so low you think, 'Why not?'

And when somebody — anybody —
wants you, even Aaron, it's like
a ray of...

Argh!

Idiot!

Sorry, bro — got caught in the trap.

Pascalle.
Leave me alone, Van.

I am begging you not to do this.

Babe, your chariot awaits.
No, it doesn't.

It does, because my truck is parked
outside, cos I parked it there.

Well, she's not going with you.

We have a deal.

Well, you don't have a deal with me.

Don't want one with you!

Van, get out of my face before
I kick your nuts out your arse.

You don't have to do this.

It's what I deserve. But I'm not
going anywhere dressed like this.

Babe, you look awesome.

Take me home so I can
get changed first.

OK, sweet, and then we start
with the sport of kings.

Is that tennis?

Tenpin bowling.

sh*t, man.

What could I have done?

Oh, nah, you did good.

Bullshit.

Catch you later, eh.

(TYPES)

So, is it true?

Is what true?

What they say about pregnant chicks?

If some dickwad says the
wrong thing, they get violent?

Nah, that when they're ready
to drop, they get super horny.

You know that giving a sh*t
isn't my strong suit, right?

So you know that I'm not
bullshitting when I say — do not
leave the house with dickwad.

I made a deal with him.
So?

So I'm not you. I can't just lie my
way out of things when it suits me.

Pascalle, he's a f*ck-knuckle.
Your life cannot suck that much.

It does.

What about looking after old people?

I don't do that any more.

When you did, you were bearable.

Then why were you so mean about it?

Pascalle, there are shitloads of old
people in the world — more and more
every day.

You don't really mean that.

I'm saying it to
stop an abomination.

At least he notices me,
at least he wants me.

Why do you even care that
Aaron Spiller wants you?

Pascalle, you used to crush
guys like Aaron Spiller.

That was then, this is now.

Stop being pathetic!

I had people who loved me, who
needed me. And now I've got nothing.
Now I've got Aaron Spiller.

(GROANS DRAMATICALLY)

MISCHIEVOUS MUSIC

I'm his son, I'm a lawyer — take
your pick. I just want a last known
address for Wolfgang West.

Well, hold for what exact—?

DOOR CLOSES

Got a call today — Corky.

You sent him here! You f*cking sent
him here and I didn't do anything!
Nothing!

What the hell are you playing at?

What are you playing at?
A problem?

Yeah, we're having a problem —
the way you're playing my mother.
Who says?

Gary, stop the bullshit. You're
f*cking with her the same way you
f*cked with me.

Is this how you show
respect to a valued client?

(EXHALES, LAUGHS)
You're not my client anymore.

As of when?
As of now.

Jethro, I'm not the bad guy here.
So you keep saying.

I like your mother — a lot.

Trust me, Jethro.
We're not so far apart here.

It was a pleasure doing
business with you.

If Wolf knew Gary bloody
Savage then I'd know him.

I think Wolf knew him, Grandpa.

Like f*ck he did. I would have
known. And that bastard Savage
said he knew me. Bullshit!

Maybe Wolf told him something.

He wouldn't go blabbing.
Wests don't blab.

And if Wolf knew Savage—
I think there's a fairly
clear connection here to Wolf.

You want to nail
him cos he framed ya.

I'm ain't petty.

No, you do want to pop him, though.

Up yours.

Look, this goes back to Wolf
somehow. So now we find him.

I can do. I just need a few days.

Which Wolf is this?

How many Wolfs are there, Falani?

Probably not many, but it could be
a common Palagi name — like Sione.

Do you know where Wolf is?

We talked briefly — about business —
before he sh*t down country.

Where?
Now, that depends on who's asking.

I'm asking.

Nah. No idea.
OK, then I'm asking.

He's not so happy with
you, so still no idea.

Why's he not happy with me?

Always taking your mother's side.

Where the f*ck is he, Falani?

He said nothing about not
telling you. So, uh...

Jesus Christ.

Whakatane! What the f*ck's
he doing down there?!

Go on, say it — I'm a loser.

Go on, you know you want to.

Well, of course,
but you're making it too easy.

I had three things to do. How
many did I get done? None. Loser.

Oh well, should be loser, loser,
loser, then. Three times loser.

If I could have just done one thing,
you know which one I would have
chosen?

Munter's wedding.

You.

That was my last guess.

It'd be real cool to
have a baby in the house.

Not for me.

Especially if it was a girl baby.

Cos then it'd be like one girl
checked out and another little cutie
checked in.

Van, please don't play
the Aurora card on me.

But it would, eh? Like balance.

Ying and yam. That would've
been so cool, man.

But you're not going to do that, eh?

Keep the baby.

f*ck!

What did he do to you?
What didn't he do?

I'm going to k*ll Aaron Spiller.
Eh?

Where is he? Where is he?
I'm going to f*cking k*ll him.

Ew, yuck, like I'd let
him touch me. Gross.

Why do you look like sh*t, then?

Because I just had the
worst time in my life, OK?

You said you were bowling with him.

The most pointless thing in
the world — with huss shoes.

OK, so every time I got up to bowl,

Aaron and his 'lads' made these
really funny jokes about my 'booty'.

And yeah, I know I have a great
arse, but every time? Thank God we
got kicked out.

Why did you get kicked out?

Cos one cr*ck too many and I kinda
bowled the ball at them, but I hit
the vending machine.

Still not explaining
why you look like sh*t.

Well, then Aaron goes,
'Yo, babe, gotta show off my girl.'

Ew.

Yeah. So guess where
he takes me for a drink?

This my new local, baby.
I'm gonna be here all the time.

Don't call me 'baby'.

Still not remotely clear
why you look like sh*t.

So, we had our drinks and then...

You know what, baby? Out of all
the chicks that work here, you have
way the best bazookas. No dispute.

And then he went too far.

For an extra hundy,
can I touch them?

OK, that is it. The deal is off.

You can keep your f*cking money!
My life may be sh*t, but it's not
that sh*t!

And now I don't have a job any more.

Cos you wouldn't let
Aaron touch your tits?

No. Because I kinda threw my drink
at him, but I missed and took out
the beer fridge.

Not a good night for throwing, then.

Whoa, whoa. So you're
not on the game?

What?

You're not a hooker?

Ew!

CRASH!

sh*t!

No, no, no, this is awesome!
One! I did one thing!

So why do you look like sh*t?

Cos I had to walk home in my
stilettoes and I fell down a bank!

He didn't even give you
a lift home. What a w*nk*r.

Actually, that bit was quite funny.

KNOCK ON DOOR ]

Cos after we got chucked out of
Nunga's, we went out into the car
park—

What have you done with her?

I haven't done anything with her.

Oh, not her. Muffy!
Well, who's Muffy?

My truck! You stole her.

Why would I want your f*cking truck?
Don't come near my sister again,
all right?

I want my truck back.
Get outta here.

What?

One. (LAUGHS)

Mmm... That's good, Van.
Only two more to go.

You think I can't add up?
You said it.

You could make it two,
if you wanted.

Don't push it.

What are those?
Well, the rums weren't working,
so I switched to tequila and orange.

(SOBS)

Oh God, I feel terrible.

Don't you start.

I could have put off Lucky's bladder
surgery and gave her that money.

I'm OK. Really.

You know what? We do great
weddings on our back lawn.

Yeah, and Aurora's wake was great.

It'd be symbolic. It's, like,
where you guys hooked up.

And cheap.
And that too.

Hey, ladies. Hey, baby.

How's it going?
We're cheering her up.

I can see.

It's going to be all good, babe.

You think?
I know.

All right. That's it.
Thank you. Goodbye.

You fellas carry on with
the cheering. I'll be back.

Falani.
Hey, my tooled-up friend.

Can I have a word?
Yeah.

Whoo!

(LAUGHS)

Munt, what have you done?

I liquidated an asset.

I didn't know you had any assets.

I don't know. There's not much
call for stolen tow trucks.

Doesn't your brother own
a towing company down in Porirua?

Who told you that?

You did. And it's my wedding, man.

It's all ours, babe. Maybe it's not
enough for everything, like Falcon
Crest.

But we still get the honeymoon in
Raro. And we get to keep the dessert
sculpture.

Come here. (GIGGLES)

Mum.
Not interested, Van.

I just want to say one thing.
I know how much investment people
are putting into this baby.

I get it. But can you please
just back off with the pressure?

So it's not a done deal, then?

I just need to find my
own way through this.

OK. Fair enough. You want breakfast?

Please.

Psst!

Two?
Yeah, Van. Two (!)

(GROWLS TRIUMPHANTLY)

Hey.

'Sup, dawg?

Hey, Munter. How's Kasey?

She hurled her ring,
but she's better today.
Great.

Hey, Mrs West, that offer to host
our wedding on your back lawn —
is that still good?

It's cool, eh, Mum?
Yeah, absolutely.

Then we'd be honoured to accept.

Turangawaewae, baby!

Let's get f*cked up.
Yeah.

Hey, maybe I could do my best
man's speech from the roof,

and then I could, like, jump off.
You know? Stage-dive into the crowd.

This is your family we're talking
about — you think they'd catch ya?

Yeah, man. I saved everything.

Yeah, you did that.
It's three for three.

Yep.

Three for three.

Leave me alone.
Do you know that you
have new friends?

Piss off!

Pascalle, I know you think that
your life is sh*t at the moment.

No, I know my life is sh*t.

But if you think that's tragic,
check out this girl.

Every day, I get up out of bed and
I think how lucky I am to be able
to get up.

And that I have a bed. Although
I'm not sharing it with anyone
right now.

That's me! ]

It's virtually you, and you've
been online for only two hours and
already you've got new friends.

Virtual friends, so therefore
kind of lame, but they seem to like
virtual Pascalle.

Check out all the comments.

PASCALLE: I love nature, I love
the trees, I love the bushes,
I love the grassy things...

Wow, they really like me.

And nature is in everybody.

And, like, trees — they
remind me of old people,

cos they bend in the wind
and they creak a bit sometimes.

Whoa, this Kirby guy
really really likes me.

Oh yeah, that one
is a bit disturbing.

No, no, it's good.

Wow.

(CHUCKLES)

So, I guess that's
the main thing here —

to be a little bit more
like trees, and have roots...
and be rooted.

Please don't tell me you're
having second thoughts.

In a manner of speaking.

The delivery suite's all booked,
everything's in place.

Except me. Slight change of plan.

You can't back out now.

Who said anything about backing out?
But I need half my money, upfront,
today.

No way.

I have a financial matter
that I need to resolve.

And I need to remove myself from my
family till after the birth. If you
can't do that, then it is 'no way'.

You have a beer going spare.

Piss off, Falani.

My powers of observation reveal
two beers, only one person.

Yeah, it's for my groom. Stag night.

Call this a stag night? Where's
the hot totties and the friends with
boot polish?

Ah! Not going on like that.
We're keeping it nice and quiet
here, thinking outside the triangle.

It's square.

It's a triangle, from Bahama.

Bermuda.
Bahama.

Bermuda. Where is your groom?

Well, he'll be here.
CELLPHONE RINGS

Hello?
Yeah, Van, it's me.

Ah. Hi, Munter.

Yeah, there's a problem
with tonight.

We're all set here.

Yeah, I can't come.

What? Look, it's real quiet, OK?

There's no ball shaving,
no boot polish.

I can't come, man!

Munt, is this because
of the triangle?

Yeah, kind of.

OK, well, we say
no to that triangle.

All right? It's a dumb triangle.
And we kick it in the ass, man.

Van, I got arrested, bro.

Ooh. What, you're sh1tting me?

I wish I was.

Well, it's bullshit. It's got to be.

Nah, it's theft of a vehicle.

You didn't steal anything.

You tell them that you wouldn't—

Hey, uh, just don't tell Kasey.
It would break her heart.

I won't. And Munt, I'll
get you out, OK? I promise.

I've gotta go, man.

He get, ah, held up?

No way does this happen, man. Not
to my groom. Not while I'm the best
man.

Fine words! Cheers!

I'm not waiting in the bloody car.

Just till things are cool with Dad.

I didn't come all this way with
your crap driving to wait in the
car.

He's not going to be
pleased to see you.

Tough.
You're going to want to deck him.

Nah.
Yes, you are.

Don't make me have to
take my d*ck out in public.

All right, I'll stand at the back.
Will that keep everybody happy?

Works for me.

Good.

Uh, my driving? Not crap.

(KNOCKS ON WINDOW)

Yeah?

We're looking for Wolfgang West.

Who's 'we'?
I'm his father.

Oh.
Yeah. I'm his son.

Oh. Jethro, I presume.

And who are you?

I'm Sheree.

Is he here?

He is now.

ANIMAL WOLF HOWLS

TENSE CLASSIC ROCK PLAYS

What can I do for you, officer?

SMACK! SMACK!
Oh, sh*t! Leave it, you idiot.

Dad! Leave it the f*ck
alone! We need to talk!

It's about Gary bloody Savage!

Gary Savage. What about him?

He's sitting in your house
like he owns the bloody place.

Right. Guess you better
come inside, then.