01x09 - The Substitutes

[bunniefuu]

- I'm chlorophyll kid.

- Thanks for auditioning.

Wanna show us
what you can do?

[Grunts]

- Grow!

[Plant roars]

- You can call off
your plant now.

- Oh, I just
make plants grow fast.

I can't control 'em.

[Both sigh]

[Sighs]

- And so it begins.

[Plant roars]

[Theme music]

- Uhh!
Can't you do anything

To stop this thing?

- Well, would it help
if I made it bigger?

All: no!

- Then not really.

- Yo! Over here!

[All gasp]

[Plant growls and roars]

[Giggles]

- That's enough
of you today.

- I got a really
good feeling
about this. Heh.

- Who's next?

- Um...stone boy?

Superman:
and what's your power?

- I can change
the color of anything!

- Then you must be
color kid.

- Mm-hmm. Ha!

[Giggles]

- Hi. My superhero name

Is porcupine pete.

- Uh-uh, no way!

Not him again.

- No, no, it's okay.

He passed my prep course
with flying colors.

Pete! Do your thing!

[Grunts]
- aah!

[Crash]

- So he needs to work
on his aim a little.

Ow!

- Cam.
Good to see you, buddy.

- Hey, thanks, but it's...
It's matter eater lad now.

- Cool name.

[Gasps]
- huh?

[expl*si*n]

- You're next, star boy.

- Is that all he can... Whoa!

Unh! Ow!

Okay, I get it.

He makes things heavy, too.

Saturn girl: alright,
infectious lass,

Whenever you're ready.

- Ew. Eww.

Ah... Ah-choo!

Ah-choo!

Ah-choo!

- I'm happy to announce
that the newest members

Of the legion
of superheroes are...

Matter eater lad
and star boy.

- As for the rest of you,
better luck next time.

As long as there
isn't a next time.

- [Sighs] I just wish
I had another chance.

- Me, too. I mean,
I turned superman
lime green!

That was dumb.

If I had turned him
forest green,

I<i> know</i> I would've gotten in!

- Father was right.

- What about you, stone boy?

Anything you'd
do differently?

- Hey! Sorry you guys
didn't get in.

You know, I failed
my first audition, too.

- [Sniffs] really?

- Actually, according
to the official

Collector's edition
of the legion log,

It took you


- Yeah, well...

The point is, keep trying.

At first glance, my power
may not seem that cool,

But being a hero
isn't about your powers.

It's how you choose
to use them.

[Radio beeps]
- legionnaires...
Report to the launch bay.

We've got trouble.

- Don't give up!

- Oh, yeah.

That's gonna be us someday.

- Why not now?

If we want
to get into the legion,

We have to show them
what we can<i> really</i> do!

- What<i> is</i> that?

- I'm not certain.

Whatever it is,

It seems to be feeding
on the ionosphere.

- I take it
that's a bad thing?

- Without its protection,

Cosmic rays
would incinerate the earth.

- Then why are
we still in here talking?

- Hang on a sec.

Let's see what
the new guys can do.

- Ahh!

Hmm. Tastes like chicken.

- Well, I hope
he saved room for seconds.

- This isn't
just any city, guys.

<I>this</i> is new metropolis.

We're gonna need
to be alert,

Vigilant, smart.

Now let's hit the streets
and do some good!

Thanks, mom!

- [Narrating]
infectious lass,
hero log.

On our first day protecting
the city from evil,

[Sniffs]
it went even better
than expected.

[Woman sneezes]

[Woman groans]

[Bank alarm rings]

Infectious girl:
every one of us
used our powers

In exciting new ways.

We protected the innocent

And braved terrible dangers.

- Thanks, kid.

- Uh, whoa, whoa,

Hey, hey, hey, stop! Stop!

- Bebop!

Infectious girl:
I actually think
we made a big difference.

- Aah! Aah!

[Screaming]

Infectious girl:
I think we could
get used to this.

We sure showed the world
what we can do.

[Stomping]

- They want to mock me,
you know that.

They mock starfinger.

But that was before
I had a different power

In every finger, like ice!

Or sonic boom!

I could never figure out

What this little guy
did, though...

Until yesterday!

No one will mock me now.

Not when I use
these little furries

To rob new metropolis blind.

[Gasps]

- The creatures do tend
to float away unexpectedly,

But, uh, what are
you gonna do?

- I'll tell you what
<i>you're</i> gonna do.

Time...in jail!

[Infectious girl
uses inhaler]

- And who are you?

- We're...

You know,
that's a good question.

We never did pick
a name for ourselves...

- Pete. [Sniffs]
uh, villain.

- Right!

Let's get him!

Both: uhh! Unh!

- Aah! Uhh!

Whoa!

- Unh!

Aah! Uhh!

- Grow!

-<I> that</i> was easy.

- Hello!

You still have
to get past me.

- Very well.

[Grunts]

- Some chartreuse
should stop you!

No? How 'bout magenta?

Taupe?

Lavender?

Aah!

Unh!

- Okay, then,

If there's nothing else,
I'll be going.

Fuzzies,

Grab the loot!

- We gotta follow him!

- How?

- I don't think
it'll be that hard.

Bouncing boy:
oh, there's more of 'em?

Superman:
where are they all
coming from?

- I'm not sure.

They don't appear
to be from this dimension,

Or any of the ones
adjacent to it.

- Great.

Well, is there
anything we<i> do</i> know?

Brainiac:
yes. Wherever
they're coming from,

There appears to be
unlimited supply.

- Huh?

- You guys ready to do
what has to be done?

All: yeah!

- Okay!

- Brainiac 5.

Wait. Weren't all of you
at the audition?

Yes, sir!

Porcupine pete here.

We've got urgent news.

Starfinger is on the loose
in new metropolis!

- What's the<i> urgent</i> news?

- Um, th... That was it.

- We've got
something up here

Eating
our planet's ionosphere.

I don't have time
for a science lesson,

But let's just say
this is a very bad thing.

- But...what about
starfinger?

- He's a third-rate nuisance
and a waste of our time.

I'm sure you'll
think of something.

Brainiac 5, out.

- Yeah, but...

- Star boy, watch your back!

I'm calling in
reinforcements.

Rendezvous at 17.48 degrees
to intercept.

- Copy that.

- I just don't know
what to do.

I'm stuck!

- You're not the only one.
[Sighs]

- No, I mean I'm stuck
on what to do next.

If the legion isn't coming,
it's up to us!

All: aah!

- They're up there
saving the world.

The least we can do
is our part down here!

Who's with me?

Hey!

Wait up!

[Bang]

All: aah!

- Oh!

Who are you people?

Seriously.

Do I owe you money
or something?

- We're the...

Heroes that are gonna
take you down!

- You're welcome to try.

I am starfinger!

- He's a little dramatic,
don't you think?

- Ha ha!

Huh?

[Rustling]

- Gotcha!

[Screams]

[Infectious girl grunts]

- Ha!

- Uhh! Unh!

- Aah! Whoa!

[Laughs]

- Ah-choo!

[Moans]

- Ha!

- Ah-choo!

- Oh!

- Yoo-hoo!

- Unh!

[Grunts]

- Stone boy?

[Grunts]

- Uhh! Getting tired?

- Ha! You kidding?

I could do this all week!

- We may have to.

Brainie, I guess
it's too much to hope

That you've come up with some
sort of brilliant solution?

- Actually, I have.

But you're not
gonna like it.

This cannon
I'm building

Will polarize
the ionosphere,

Making it inhospitable
to any creature
that touches it.

Superman: like a giant
bug zapper. Cool.

There's also
a 14.349% chance

It will incinerate the sky
over the western hemisphere.

- Maybe you should
keep thinking.

- At the rate
these things are eating,

We have less than
an hour left.

If I had some idea
where they were coming from,

We might have
a better chance.

[Roars]

Brainiac:
watch your left flank,
element lad.

- Incoming, sun boy!

[Grunts]

[Creatures screaming]
[grunts]

Brainiac: good job, tyroc!

Blok, clear a path.

And...stone boy?

It's charging.

- There has to be
another way

To stop these things.

- Solar radiation
on the earth's surface

Is nearing critical,
superman.

I don't have
any other options.

- Then we'll have
to work faster.

All: aah!

[Starfinger laughing]

- This will teach you
to tangle with starfinger!

Huh?

- Chlorophyll kid,
it's up to you.

- You can do it!

We believe in you!

- Unh!

[Grunts]

Grow!

- Aah!

All: yes!

[Plant roars]

[All gasp]
all: no!

- Aah!

[All whimper]

- You should feel honored.

You'll be the ones
to put me onto the map.

My name will be
synonymous with evil.

Prepare yourselves
for my 10-finger salute!

Aah! Aah!

[Groans]

Infectious girl:
whew! That was close.

- Ha! Lucky you landed
where you did.

- Lucky?

I had to calculate
the exact trajectory

Of my descent
while factoring in

Air pressure, wind speed,
not to mention...

What?
- You're talking.

- Look, what's important now
is that the furries

Are what's eating
the atmosphere.

- It's no good!

I can't get through
to anybody.

- Of course not.

By now the atmospheric
disturbances will have

The whole system down.

- But if we can't reach
the legion,

Or... Or the science police,

- Then the fate
of the whole world

Is in<i> our</i> hands!

- Actually,

It's in starfinger's hand.

[Grunting]

[Grunts]
how do we get
your glove off?

- I'll never tell.

- Aw, come on,

Why not?!

- Well, mostly because
I never...

Figured out how.

- We're at full power.

- I just hope
we're not about

To save the world
by destroying it.

- Huh?

- Uh, guys,

When I said keep trying,

I meant next year.

- No, listen...
It's starfinger.

His glove... It's...

It's what's creating
these creatures.

- I have finally
unleashed a plan

That will destroy the world.

- If we're going
to save the earth,

We have to fire
the neutralizer now!

- You've got to believe us!

- I believe you.

- But we need...

- I believe 'em, too.

Brainie, check the glove.

- Hey! How did you do that?

Give that back or I'll...

- Move anything...

And he'll bite it off.

- Well?

- It appears
you are correct.

- Whoo-hoo-hoo! Yeah!
- We saved the world!

- Not yet.

Now you've saved the world.

It appears
we've underestimated
the danger of starfinger.

- Of course you did.

- We underestimated
all of you.

I hope we'll see you
at the next audition.

- Thanks, lightning lad.

But I think
we're gonna pass.

- We may not be
as powerful as all you,

But, the 5 of us, together,

Make a pretty good team.

- Maybe we could even
fill in for you

Once in a while.

[Sniffs]
you know, if there's

Something you're
too busy to deal with.

- So, what, you'd be like

A legion
of substitute heroes?

- Ooh!

I like it.

- We'd be honored
to work with you again.

- Wow! You hear that, guys?

Nothing could
ruin this moment.

[Horn honks]
- peter!

It's past your nap time!

- Except that.

[Theme music]