04x01 - A Star is Born

[bunniefuu]

♪ It's Maya ♪

♪ It's Maya ♪

♪ And Miguel ♪

♪ And Miguel ♪

♪ What they will do next ♪

♪ You never can tell ♪

♪ It's Maya ♪

♪ It's Maya ♪

♪ And Miguel ♪

♪ And Miguel ♪

♪ Brother and sister ♪

♪ And best friends as well ♪

♪ With each misadventure,
they're put to the test ♪

♪ Working together
is what they do best ♪

♪ Helping their
family and friends,
that's a start ♪

♪ They make a great team
as they each do their part ♪

♪ It's Maya ♪

♪ It's Maya ♪

♪ And Miguel ♪

♪ And Miguel ♪

♪ What they will do next
you never can tell ♪

♪ It's Maya ♪

♪ It's Maya ♪

♪ And Miguel ♪

♪ And Miguel ♪

♪ Brother and sister ♪

♪ And best friends as well ♪

♪ Brother and sister ♪

♪ Maya and Miguel ♪

I'm so hungry.

I know, Tito,

but family dinner
means we wait
for the whole family.

I am so hungry.

See?

Hola, sobrino.

Hello, son.

Hello, daughter.

Hola, mi esposa.

Hello, bird.

Ay!

Why are you so happy?

Did we win something?

Almost.

We got money
from the city
development fund

to make
a commercial for
the pet store.

Right on, papi!

That's cool!

Congratulations,
mi amor.

Un comercial?

What are you going to
say in your commercial?

Well, I'm going to
tell people
about the store,

that we have
nice pets,

that we are
honest people.

Si, si, si, papi.

Yo se que tenemos
mascotas.

But what about
your gimmick?

Gimmick?

Yes!

We got deals,
deals, deals

on wheels,
wheels, wheels.

If you don't come in,

you'll be stuck
with a lemon.

Now that's a commercial.

You need an exploding sign
or a special effect

or a talking animal.

Oh, talking animal?

I'm going to be a star.

"To be or not to be?"

I don't think papi
is looking for
Shakespeare, Paco.

Sheesh.

Eso es.

I've got it.

Now I know where
I get it from.

"To be or not to be?

That...is...
the...question."

Paquito, you can't be
in the commercial.

Bye-bye.

Hi, papi.

Can we watch you rehearse
for your commercial?

Of course.

Wait right there.

Gracias, mi amor.

You were right.

I did need
a gimmick.

♪ If you want a pet,
go to Santos ♪

[Dogs whimpering]

♪ We have nice
puppies ♪

[Dogs barking
and howling]

♪ And even some
guppies ♪

Yeah.

He needs help.

Help?

Paco will help.

♪ Santos Pets ♪

♪ We have nice cats ♪

Santos Pets,
we have nice cats.

♪ They're soft and furry ♪

They're soft
and furry,

and they keep out
rats.

Tickle, tickle.

Ta-da!

Ay!

Well, something
like that.

Singing was really
a great idea, Maya.

What do you think?

Um...

Oh, it was...
good.

Yes, good,
but it lacked pizzazz!

Eso es!

I'm going to help you.

I know.

I get
a funny feeling
in my stomach

when she says that,
too,

but, papi,
you need the help.

It will be a great
family project.

We'll start
tomorrow morning,
bright and early.

Paco loves toothpaste.

Makes my teeth...

I mean, my beak shine.

Paco loves
shaving cream.

I'm practicing
for the commercial.

[Snoring]

Time to get up, papi.

This is your


Date prisa!

Are you awake?

Rise and shine!

What?

W-w-what?

What happened?

Paco loves this
toothbrush.

Uh-oh.

You don't want
that.

Shaving cream?

Paco!

Toothpaste will
rid your mouth
of unwanted flavors.

Paco!

It's time to go--

Paco?

Bathroom jokes
are not going to
get you the part.

Anyone want cereal?

Aah!

The cereal is alive!

No, para mi no.

Me neither.

No way.

Did someone say "cereal"?

Cereal!

♪ It's crunchy
and munchy ♪

♪ You can even
have it for lunchy ♪

Ay, ay, ay.

And you still
can't be in
the commercial.

What's a bird to do?

Smoke machine.

Check.

More, Tito.

More, please.

Are you sure?

It's TV.

They say bigger
is always better.

Who's they?

Oh, brother.

Pig!

Check.

Wig.

Check.

Please put this on him.

Why?

Funny works.

Camera.

Got it.

Ahem.

OK, everyone,
we're ready
to sh**t.

Places, please.

Ready, set,
action!

Action!

Paco loves
Santos Pets.

Paco is a Santos pet.

Surf's up!

Papi, you're on.

We have beautiful dogs,

bigger cats...

Smoke, please.

We need the smoke.

Lizards and snakes
and bunnies that hop.

[Coughing]

Keep going, papi.

You're doing great.

Come on down to--

[Coughing]

Santos Pet Shop.

[Coughing]

Cut! Print!

Beautiful.

All right,
maybe a little less
smoke next time.

OK, everybody ready?

I guess so.

And now the world premiere
of the first commercial
for Santos Pet Shop.

Paco loves Santos Pets.

We have beautiful dogs
and bigger cats--

[Coughing]

Not too bad.

Aah!

Ay, ay, ay.

We have lizards and snakes
and bunnies that--

[Coughing]

Down to...

Santos Pet Shop.

Cut! Print.

Bravo!

[Whistles]

Bravo!

Paco!

Que lio!

But don't worry,
there's a plan "b."

[Gasping]

Oh, no.

Oh, yes.

I have a new plan
for your television
commercial.

Oh, really?

Yes, papi.

I found a real director

to make
the commercial sizzle.

Sizzle?

A real director?

That's cool.

Wouldn't it
be better for me

if I just
tell people

that I am an
honest businessman

who stands by
his pets?

Sure, papi,
but you can say
all that and more.

This is
my big break--

Big break!
Big break!

If you come near
that pet store,

I'll--I'll--

well, I'll think
of something.

Work with me, people.

I mean, family.

I found a real director,

so let's look
professional, OK?

OK, Paco?

OK.

[Singing]

Red leather,
yellow leather.

Red leather,
yellow leather.

[Singing]

Paco's going to
be a star.

CROWD: Paco! Paco! Paco!

Hola!

Hola. Si, si.

What are you doing
in here?

Nothing.

[Doorbell rings]

He's here.

Please behave,
Paquito.

PACO, VOICE-OVER:
Now where was I?

Showtime.

Smiles, everyone.

Smiles.

Yeah, yeah.

Sure.

Welcome!

Este es su casa.

Hola.

Hola.

Hola.

Fabian?

Didn't you direct
Maya and Tito
in a school play?

Yes, but it was
community theater.

Have you ever directed
a commercial before?

No, this is my debut.

Oh.

I have also been
accepted to film school.

Ah, good.

Where's the talent?

Here! Here!

Paco here!

What can he do?

I can tumble.

I can dance.

[Singing]

I can juggle.

Lo siento.

I can play
romantic leads.

Your eyes are so glassy.

Yuck!

And now,
the big finale!

Ay!

Oh, no!

[Coughing]

And cut!

What's wrong
with your parrot?

What parrot?

Calmate.

How about we go
see the pet store?

Good idea.

I just want to tell people

that I have nice pets
and a nice store.

Simple, you know?

Simple is the new
complicated.

These cages, the decor,
I love it.

It's simple, it's real.

If I can just capture
this on film,

capture you on film,

this is going to be
a summer blockbuster.

It's a commercial.

Solamente un comercial.

The commercial version
of a summer blockbuster.

We start first thing
tomorrow morning.

Cool!

Yay!

Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

Destiny is mine.

Destiny is mine.

Are you excited?

Yes.

I think we found
the right person
for the job.

Good.

Me, too.

We better
hurry up.

Man, a parrot can't
catch a break around here.

I wonder why
this is so heavy.

Rapido!

Date prisa!

Coming!

[Gasping]

What is all this?

Fabian said it takes
a lot of work

to make something
look natural
on film.

I hope so.

Ay!

Donde esta
mi tienda?

You're late.

What happened
to my store?

It just wasn't
eye-catching enough,

so we're going to
use this flat
to brighten it up.

It really pops,
doesn't it?

Well, what happened
to keeping it real?

No!

I'm here!

See, I do stunts.

Ooh, ay...

Excuse me?

Hello?

Papi, que pasa?

This isn't my pet store.

Papi, we have
to trust Fabian's
artistic vision

and give him
a chance, right?

OK, if you say so.

That's the oldest
mistake in the book.

Hello?

I need you people
in makeup.

Makeup?

Doll, I'm going to
find the inner you.

[Coughing]

Eh, no.

That's not right.

Oh.

[Grunting]

Excuse me.

Sorry, that's my eye.

There.

Perfect.

Well, maybe not.

Is this the vision
you were talking about?

Trixie,
you are a genius.

Fabian, can I--

Just a moment.

We're behind
schedule.

That is fabulous.

Fabulous!

Papi, everyone likes
the circus, don't they?

You don't really
expect us

to wear this,
do you?

Well, that color
looks good on you two.

Who are you?

Who am I?

Soy Paco.

One of the stars!

Hello?

Excuse me, Fabian.

What's up?

I don't mean
to sound ungrateful,
but this--

all this,
it just isn't me.

Look, Santi,
everyone gets nervous

their first time
in front of the camera.

Don't worry.

I'll make you look great,

even if I have to use
special effects to do it.

OK, I'll give
it a try.

Can I get
the backup dancers?

ALL: Backup dancers?

OK, Santiago,

your lines are right here
on this cue card.

Quiet on the set,
please!

Take one.

And action.

[Music playing]

ALL: It's the pet guy!

Cut!

I'll say "action,"

then you read
your lines, OK?

Take two.

And action.

[Music playing]

ALL: It's the pet guy!

It if slithers,
trots, swims, or pops--

Cut!

That's "hops,"
not "pops."

Oh, "hops."

Yeah, it makes
a lot more sense.

Take 9.

And action.

ALL: It's the pet guy.

Cut!

Take 14.

Action.

ALL: It's the pet guy.

I'm sorry.

I'll go again.

Cut!

I'll get it this time.

Cut!

Take 19.

Action.

[Music playing]

ALL: It's the pet guy.

If it slithers,
trots, swims, or hops,

you can find it here
at Santos Pet Shop.

Cut!

Done!

Phew.

You're a natural.

You were great,
papi.

OK, bring in
the ostrich.

Ostrich?

What is that
doing here?

This is
a pet store,
right?

Yes, but ostriches
aren't pets--

at least,
not around here.

You really need
to free up
your thinking.

Cue the animal.

Cue the animal?

Cue the animal?

That's me.

That's me!

Wait! I'm coming!

I'm ready for my close-up,
mister director.

Nice donkey ostrich.

OK, maybe this wasn't
my best idea.

You think?

He is looking
at me.

I'm here!

You need me!

You really need me!

Start the
wind machine.

What?

Wind machine?

[Shouting]

The show...
must go on!

Where's the camera?

Yee-ha!

Cut!

That's a wrap!

Don't worry.

I'll fix everything.

Yee-ha!

This commercial,

if you must
call it that,

is my masterpiece.

I think it speaks
for itself,

so I'll stop
talking about it--

except to say
it's brilliant.

[Paco squawking]

Just stepping on
to the red carpet,

Paco!

Hello! Hola!

Hi! Hola!

Paco?

No autographs, please.

No autografos.

The world premiere
of "Pet Shop."

Starring me!

Uh, yeah.

We did have to
recast some parts.

[Music playing]

You're going to
get the best pets
at Santos Pet Shop,

or I'm not
Santiago Santos.

Wasn't that fabulous?

I look good.

Paco,
that wasn't you.

A good actor
disappears
into his roles.

That wasn't
any of us.

What happened
to the store,

and my dad,

and the pets that
he actually sells?

You just don't
understand television.

Your father,
the store, the pets,

we're professionals.

I had to bring
excitement to them

so people would want
to rush right over.

But people love to shop
at Santos Pet Shop.

It's perfect just
the way it is.

Maya, muchas gracias.

So, thanks
for your help, Fabian,

but you won't be
directing the sequel.

[Fabian sighs]

It is the fate
of an artist to be
misunderstood.

I'm sorry
it didn't turn out

the way you would
have liked.

Eso es!

[All sighing]

No more ideas.

Papi, you were right.

I think that you should
make the commercial
you wanted to,

one that tells the truth
about our pet shop.

Yeah, you have nice pets
and a nice store

and you're honest
and kind

and that's all
that's important.

Yeah!

Gracias, but I'm still
going to need your help.

We are honest
and trustworthy.

We have great pets
and wonderful service.

So...

Cue the bird.

Psst. Paco!

Paco!

Come to Santos Pet Shop.

That was great!

That was great.

I'm so proud
of all of you.

Maya, gracias
por tu ayuda, mija.

I really appreciate
your help.

I couldn't have
done it without you.

Awk, her!?
What about me?

♪

♪