07x09 - Alcohol

[bunniefuu]

FEMALE DISPATCHER ON RADIO: One-Adam-. One-Adam-, a in progress.

One-Adam-, handle code .

[SIREN WAILING]

One hundred and twenty Lady Elinor Hair Dryers

were stolen from a warehouse in East L.A.

Serial numbers, series E through .

So if anybody tries to sell any of you gentlemen a Lady Elinor,

check the serial number.

That's all I've got. Floyd?

Everybody get a copy of this?

Male, Caucasian, early s, '", bald.

He's wanted on burglaries,

at least eight assaults and a probable homicide.

He's a locksmith, works daytime, so he must be pretty good.

And he evidently does his homework.

Always has his escape route laid out.

Wilshire and West L.A. had sh*ts at him and he slipped away.

As of yesterday, the ball's in our court.

Neighborhood watches have been alerted with this make sheet,

so we might get some help there.

We want to roll fast on Baldy.

Contact me if you get anything.

That's it, fellas.

Okay, that's all, folks.

Turn off up here, will you, Pete?

You got someplace to go?

No. That old lady in front of us. We're making her nervous.

FEMALE DISPATCHER: One-Adam-, One-Adam-.

See the woman, a there now.

Oakhurst. Apartment .

Suspect is male, Caucasian, bald. P.R. is inside. One-Adam-, code .

One-Adam-. Roger.

One-Adam-, meet One-W- on Tac .

One-Adam-. Roger.

One-Adam- to One-W-. Go.

JOHNSON:Where are you?

About three blocks south of the location.

JOHNSON: This might be your man. I'll meet you there.

Right.

MAN: What is it with you?

You gonna give me a hard time, too?

Mess with me, will ya? I busted through better doors than...

MALLOY: Hold it right there.

You gotta be kidding.

Let may see some identification, please?

Just the fellows I want to see.

Officers, break that door down.

I'm afraid we can't do that.

Why not? I never asked you to do anything for me before.

Identification.

Oh.

I am Professor Albert Einstein.

Surely you must have heard of me.

Take the driver's license out.

If he can't trust Albert Einstein, who can he trust?

Your name is Harry Curtis?

Is that what it says?

What are you doing here, Mr. Curtis?

I'm trying to get into my apartment.

This isn't your apartment.

Oh, yes it is, and I can prove it.

Inside the hall closet is a case of -year-old scotch.

According to your driver's license, you're about five miles from home.

What's that woman doing in my apartment?

I called the police. Is he the one? You know, the r*pist?

MALLOY: No, ma'am.

Who's she talking about? She talking about me?

Oh, dear, I got this through the neighborhood watch.

He sort of fit the description

and when I saw him monkeying with my door, well, I thought the worst.

MALLOY: You did the right thing.

Isn't this apartment ?

Right pew, wrong church.

The wrong building, eh?

I guess it's drunker out than I thought.

-False alarm? -Yeah.

See you later.

-Easy. -Thank you.

You're a gentleman and a credit to the uniform.

Pete. I think we'd better take him in. He could hurt himself.

-Time to go. -No.

On one condition. I'm buying.

[MUMBLING INDISTINCTLY]

[DOOR BUZZING OPEN]

Is this the guy Floyd was talking about?

Why am I being incarcerated?

This is no way to treat a man of my stature.

Al Einstein, don't the name ring a bell?

I'm the guy that worked out that theory of

relatation...er... relativeness... Ah, never mind.

You wouldn't understand it anyway.

[TALKING INCOHERENTLY]

My friends call me Al.

Wanna hear me say something in algebra?

No. But how about a few words in geometry?

[LAUGHING] Just a moment. Just a moment here.

Never let it be said that

Professor Einstein don't know his own rights.

I believe I have the right to make one phone call.

I'd suggest you wait, but if you like, you can make a call.

That's better.

All right, gentlemen,

I shall now make the following call.

Help!

Hey, come on now, honest, I gotta get home.

I got a wife and three kids waiting for me.

They'll like it better if you came home sober.

But my wife will be worried and the boys...

You can call your home if you want to.

I can't do that. I've disgraced them enough.

Sleep it off, okay?

All set?

-Is something bugging you? -Yeah, him.

He seems cheerful enough. I thought he was kind of funny.

I had a close friend who was funny, too.

Got to be he was funny almost every night.

And in the afternoon, and in the morning.

Drove his car off a bridge. Left his wife with a kid.

Hey, Jim, Pete.

I got a lady in the lobby, Mrs. Chun. Lives in the neighborhood.

She tells me she gave an old wood burning stove

to one of those collection outfits

that go around picking up anything you want to donate?

Yeah?

She was cleaning out the garage. Wanted to get rid of a lot of junk.

Her husband comes home for lunch,

sees the stove's missing and hits the ceiling.

Seems he's been socking his savings away in that stove for years.

About , bucks.

You expect us to find it?

Yeah, I know, it's a big city.

But the Lieutenant figured it would be a good idea to help her out.

MACDONALD: Mrs. Chun?

This is Officer Reed and Officer Malloy.

-How do you do? -This is her daughter, Susan.

Hi.

[SPEAKING CANTONESE]

-Mom... -[SPEAKING CANTONESE]

Mrs. Chun isn't very comfortable with English,

but Susan is a good interpreter.

Can you describe the stove for us?

I thought maybe this would help.

That's very good.

It's pretty rusty, and one of the legs is missing.

It's an old piece of junk. Anybody would have thrown it away.

[BOTH SPEAKING CANTONESE]

She wants to know if you will find it for her.

What time was the stove picked up?

About nine o'clock this morning.

Almost four hours.

Do you know which organization picked it up?

She said it was a big yellow truck.

But she didn't get the license number.

But she did mention one of the back doors was missing.

Tell your mother we'll do the best we can.

[BOTH SPEAKING CANTONESE]

She said that she'll pray.

Okay, Susan. You and your mother go on home

and we'll call you as soon as these officers have anything to report.

But she can't go home, Sergeant.

Why not?

My Father said don't come home without the stove and his money.

But that might take a long time.

Susan, your father.

You don't think he'd harm your mother, do you?

No.

Then why can't she go home?

Because, Father said not to.

Do what you can, huh? But don't stay off the air too long.

Sure, Mac.

Just talked to Social Service downtown.

They say the only outfit they can think of

that paints their trucks yellow is The Brotherhood Mission.

The one on Seventh?

Think we got much chance of finding that stove?

About -.

If we find it, what do you think the odds are

that the money will still be there?

About , to one.

Furniture and the like would be up here.

If that stove had come in,

it would have been brought up here for repair.

We'd try. Antiques like that are in demand.

But as you can see, we've got nothing like it at the moment.

If we picked it up this morning, it would be here by now.

-Unless... -Unless what?

The men who drive our trucks.

They're hired from among our clients.

As you might guess, we can't afford to pay them very much.

When they come upon a good piece,

they sometimes make a deal with a used furniture dealer.

There's a fellow right over here on Sixth.

Calls himself an antique dealer.

The boys stop by his place regularly.

Do you happen to know his address?

Sure, I'll write it down for you.

No, sir! Not on your life! Never!

I got a reputation in this neighborhood.

You ask anybody up and down this street.

Did Charley Prender ever deal in stolen goods,

and they'll tell ya never.

And they can't prove I did either.

We're not looking for stolen goods,

Mr. Prender, we're trying to recover lost property.

Well, nobody lost nothing in my shop that he didn't get paid for,

and I always pay a fair price.

You can ask anybody.

We're sure you do.

We're interested in an old, wood burning stove.

You might have gotten it from one of The Brotherhood Mission drivers.

What Brotherhood Mission driver?

Since when do I do business with them guys?

Did that Reverend what's-his-name send you over here?

The nerve of that guy. I am one of his biggest contributors.

Never does one of their cups ever pass Charley Prender empty.

I'll tell ya that. You can ask anybody.

Nobody's accusing you of anything, Mr. Prender.

It's just that the owner wants very much to buy this particular stove back.

You wanna... [LAUGHING] Buy?

Oh, well, why didn't you say so?

The former owner wants to.

You're interested in a stove, you say.

A wood-burning stove.

Looks like this blueprint.

Yeah, the old-fashioned kind, with the wood in it.

Nah, we don't get a call from wood burners anymore.

Too undependable.

And a fire hazard. Don't ever forget that.

If you do come across anything resembling that, will you let us know?

But I'm telling ya, people don't go for them things anymore,

and they stink, besides.

Did the wife send you out lookin' for this?

Look, trust me.

She'll be a lot happier with this little number.

Give you twice the heat. Nice and clean. No smell.

I'm afraid not.

Tell ya what.

You don't know what the heck she wants. Admit it.

Why don't you send the little woman down.

Tell her to see me personally. Here's my card.

Open seven days a week.

It's a pleasure to do business with you.

I'll fix her up with a piece you'll be proud to own.

Charley Prender stands behind his merchandise. You can ask anybody.

Couple of deadbeats.

Now that's what I call a high-powered salesman.

He was only thinking of the little woman. You can ask anybody.

FEMALE DISPATCHER: One-Adam-. See the woman.

Hobart and Vermont. Unknown trouble.

One-Adam-. Roger.

[WOMEN TALKING INDISTINCTLY]

Don't laugh!

I been stuck in here for two hours and none of those bums will help me.

Did you call the fire department?

I ran out of dimes.

How'd you get stuck in there, ma'am?

If I knew that, I wouldn't be stuck.

And don't tell me to try turning sideways.

Hey, take it easy. It's a tight fit in here.

No wise cracks. It ain't funny.

Put your hands up, please and push up on the ceiling there.

[CROWD MURMURING]

Could've happened to anybody.

I don't want to hear one joke, one wise cr*ck.

Not even a smile!

I heard that smile!

FEMALE DISPATCHER: One-Adam-. One-Adam-.

Meet One-W- on Tac .

One-Adam-, roger.

One-Adam- to One-W-. Go.

JOHNSON:One-W-.

Looks like we got another sh*t at Baldy.

Meet me at Sixth and Wilshire.

Roger, Floyd.

Two neighbors saw him entering a building on the next block. .

They identified him from the want sheet. Both seem positive.

If you take a right here, go up the next street,

you'll see the back of about the middle of the block.

We'll cover the front.

You guys stop anything that moves. I got a feeling.

Right.

[SIREN WAILING]

One-Adam-, in pursuit. Green Dodge.

License Ocean, Victor, Charles.

Eastbound on Western from Saticoy.

FEMALE DISPATCHER: All units on all frequencies, stand by,

One-Adam- in pursuit.

MALE DISPATCHER: One-Adam-, what's your location?

Now southbound on Hillary.

MALE DISPATCHER: One-Adam-, northbound on Hillary.

Pete!

One-Adam-, my partner is in foot pursuit.

East in the alley block of Brand.

Come on. Get out of here!

-Did you see that truck? -No.

It was yellow and a back door was missing.

Was there a stove in it?

-Not a bad day's work. -Anytime, Floyd.

How do you feel, Mr. Curtis?

Huh? Oh! I guess I feel no worse than I deserve.

Hope I didn't cause you fellows any trouble.

Not at all.

You sure you're okay?

Oh, yeah, sure. And...thanks.

I hope you don't have any trouble at home.

Huh? I told that story again?

I'm a bachelor. That's the one thing I did right.

Saved some nice girl a lot of misery.

Well, I gotta go, now.

No offense, fellas, but I hope I don't see you again.

Come on. Let's get back to work.

You guys come up with anything for me?

Maybe. At least I think I saw the truck.

Belongs to an outfit called Good Neighbor Charities.

They got a junkyard on Figueroa.

Think they would want to ride with us?

I've given them all the coffee they can drink.

Let's don't get their hopes up.

If prayers do the trick, the money will be there.

Mama!

[SIGHING]

[SPEAKING CANTONESE]

[CRYING WITH JOY]

She says to thank you and thank God.

I think He should get top billing. We just got lucky.

No, thank you.

She wants to give you something for helping us.

Explain to her that we're just glad we could help.

[SPEAKING CANTONESE]

She insists. She can be as stubborn as my father.

Come on. We'll give you a ride home.

Wanna speak to the man in the office about buying the stove back?

I think I can convince my father to put his money in the bank from now on.

There aren't too many of those stoves left.

I could fix it up, make it real nice.

Sure. Why not?

It would go with the dining room table you never finished.

Let's see what he's got.

-Need any help? -No.

Our friend, the drunk. Got banged up pretty bad.

Bartender says he went looking for the men's room

and fell down the cellar stairs.

Attendants are with him now.

[SLURRING] Don't worry, men. I'll take good care of you.

I'll see to it that you gentlemen are well taken care of.

What seems to be the delay?

Just take it easy, Mr. Curtis.

[STUTTERS]

Oh... I...

I met you this morning, didn't I?

You said you were going home.

I tried, but I just couldn't go through with it.

I don't have the guts for it anymore.

For what, Mr. Curtis?

You never had to spend any time alone with Harry Curtis,

or you'd know what I'm talkin' about.

It's amazing how much a guy can change in a few hours.

This morning he was funny.