04x06 - Pizza Rolls, Gender Roles, and Jazz Rolls

[bunniefuu]

Previously on "I am jazz"...

I happened to meet a girl

Who I think you would really like.

Wait, a girl?

Hi. Jazz. Nice to meet you.

All: oh!

Michaela: I'm seeing a lot more

Of jazz's personality blossom with victoria.

Do you have, like, a high gpa

And all that stuff?yeah.

Jazz: I am definitely attracted to victoria,

And I really hope that victoria wants to see me again, as well.

Hey!

Jazz: I met lynn about a year ago at this anti-bullying campaign.

Sometimes my mom, 'cause she's super religious,

She'll tell me that, like, there's a demon inside of me.

Jazz: she doesn't have the support of her family.

Dr. Marilyn: what's stressful about school?

I don't like anything about school.

It's probably why I go in my room

And shelter myself.

People who go through stress will cope in a variety of ways.

She chose food.

Dr. Charlton: if you're running a higher bmi than we want,

I'm not going to be able to do surgery,

So don't forget that.

Jazz: there's no easy way

To handle this weight-loss thing,

And I'm worried that I might be heading in the wrong direction.

This surgery is on the line.

Jazz: years ago, I was assigned male at birth,

But inside, I always knew I was a girl.

I have a girl brain and a boy body.

Being transgender hasn't been easy.

We really are walking a tightrope.

-I'm a tough case. -You're a tough case.

Come on, jazz!whoo!

Go for it, girl!

But it's made me who I am.

I am jazz.

--Captions by vitac-- www.vitac.com

Captions paid for by discovery communications

Jazz: grabbing the cart?

Jeanette: I'm grabbing a cart.

I've been told that I need to lose weight and lower my bmi

In order to get the bottom surgery.

That's six. Okay.

Iwaseating healthy,

But then I fell out of my routine in new york

Because it's basically the epicenter of amazing food.

It's very busy over there.

Let's start over there with the spinach and kale.

You said you didn't like salad anymore.

No, no. I like -- I need spinach for my smoothies.

I'm a little bit eager to get back on track

Because I feel like if I don't start losing weight now

That we're never gonna set a date,

I'm never gonna get the procedure done,

And, you know,

Everything I've hoped for isn't gonna happen.

Well, you know, I have an app on my phone

That actually scans food and rates it.

Since when do you scan food?

I do when I'm being healthy.

Dark-chocolate snacks.

Wait, maybe they're healthy.

I don't care. It's chocolate.

Well, it's thin. It might be good enough.

No, you'll eat the whole bag at once.

A "c" minus -- that's not terrible.

No, that's awful.

[ Chuckles ]

Don't go for the food sample. Nope, nope.

Well, hold on. This is a small sample.

Extra mature cheddar.

What is extra mature?

No, one per person.alright.

That's my treat.

My biggest struggle, when it comes to weight loss

And eating healthy is my willpower.

Jazz: [ gasps ]

Light whipped cream,

Only calories in this whole thing.

So divided by -- calories of whipped cream each day.

No. It's a waste of calories. Just put it back.

Jeanette: my goal at the grocery store is not only to buy healthy foods,

But to get jazz excited. Like, I want her to be like,

"Oh, yeah. We can cook this. We can cook that."

'Cause I've been through phases with jazz

Where she's on healthy eating kicks.

Like, she was a vegan for a week, like...

It's really important that we get all this healthy food

In the house, 'cause then we'll just have healthy stuff.

What if sander and griffen bring in food?

They're coming back?they're coming home.

But, like, don't let them bring in bad food.

Well, they always do.'Cause they corrupt me.

I am not able to stop myself if a temptation is right before me.

I always have to have a little bite.

I can't just push it aside.

You know, I was thinking that it might be a good idea

To go back to the hypnotherapist,

Because I just want to be able to resist the temptations

And have even stronger willpower.

I think the best that you've done

Is after you saw her the last time.

I've been wanting you to go back.

Alright, I'm totally gonna call her.

Alright. Cool. Definitely.

♪♪

You put this bag away, and I'll putthisbag away.

Here, you want to keep these bags, right?

I'll put them on the ground.

Who's home?

Hello!

Aw! Hi, baby.

Mwah.i love you so much.

The twins come marching in, and they're like pig-pen.

Like, there's this odor around them,

And I know frat house odor,

And this is theworstfrat house odor

That I've ever smelled.

I'm washing clothes for you. I'm gonna wash.

Griffen: you guys have destroyed the snack pantry.

There's nothing in it.

Yep. Yeah.

That's called me trying to lose weight.

Well, how's that working out?

I mean, I'm losing a little bit of weight,

But, like, after going to new york,

I gained some back, so, like, I'm still working on that.

How often have you been working out?

Pretty often with my friends...

[ Scoffs ]...i've been working out.

That's very vague. So, like, once a week?

Like, five days a week.five days a week?

Jeanette: what?! You don't work out five days a week.

You need to be more active.

It burns calories. You need to burn calories.

Let's go play soccer outside.

Right now?yeah.

Let's go break a sweat real quick.

Let's get a workout in -- break a little sweat.

Have fun.griffen: following you.

Come play, mom.

That's okay. I'll pass.maybe next time.

Griffen: motivating jazz to work out is not easy,

But I do know that she really does love soccer,

So kicking the ball around with her

Hopefully will motivate her to continue to stay active.

Griffen: show him what's up! Show him what's up!

[ Chuckles ]

Do you still got all the skills you used to, jazz?

Oh, hell to the yes.

Aah!are you sure? [ Chuckles ]

Looks like you're falling over the ball already.

[ Coughs ]

-Are you already out of breath? -No, I'm not.

Why are you holding your side, then?

Griffen: jazz used to be an amazing athlete.

She was oftenthebest player on the field,

And I loved watching her play.

Seeing her right now, it's kind of sad to see.

Hold on. I'm too tired.

Griffen: you're breathing realheavy.

I don't want to do this anymore.

I feel like I've been running the most.

You're also the only one that just said she needs a break.

'Cause I've been running constantly, and you guys haven't.

We've been playing for minutes.

Well, whatever! Look at you and look at me!

I'm a fat ass!

[ Panting ]

My brothers are coming down on me pretty harshly,

And I think overall they are just very concerned for me

And want me to push myself to the max

And really lose all this weight.

However, I'm gonna do this my own way

And what works for me,

And I feel like they need to understand that.

You can't expect me to be like this in one day.

-It's not gonna take one day. -Exactly!

It's gonna be a gradual process.

So then, why are you undermining me?

Okay, and I'm trying to help you.

So if you don't want my help, then fine, I won't help you.

No, I appreciate you're trying to help me,

But are you guys really trying to help me

When you come home --

[ Mockingly ] "oh, there's no good snacks here.

Let's just bring unhealthy food."

That's all griffen. Griffen always talks about food.

"Let's just order in pizza."I'm sorry, I've never had

A problem with weight.i'm sure one day later,

There's gonna be french fries in the fridge.

I'm sure there are.

Sander: jazz isn't like either of us.

She does not like our fitness advice.

Because she doesn't really like fitness,

And then she just seems to think that,

What works for us won't work for her,

But you got to start somewhere.

The food -- that's mymajor weakness.

Yes, I do think that eating is your weakness,

But being lazy is also a weakness, too.

You, like, stay in your room watching tv,

Being alone, and, like, that's another weakness.

It's not just eating.

You've been trying to lose weight, and you start,

And then you stop, and then you start.

Your underlying problem is yourself.

You don't like sticking to things.

Even if I work out and even if I'm being active,

I still go back to that junk food.

You can't keep making the same mistakes,

Which is what you've been doing.

So, guys, I love you both.

I really just don't want to talk about this anymore.

But --

No, it's really making me upset.

They have to just listen to what I have to say

And be there to support,

Rather than force me to do something

That I don't necessarily want to do.

I'm gonna go inside.

♪♪

I love your little blouse.

Yeah, I was like, "lynn looking cute today."

Jazz: I'm really excited to hang out with my friends

Because they make me feel better.

I'm so grateful to have them in my life,

And they are just cool people.

[ Laughter ]

I met lynn about a year ago at this anti-bullying campaign.

Sometimes my mom, 'cause she's super religious,

She'll tell me that, like, there's a demon inside of me.

[ Voice breaking ] you know, I've been so thankful

To have the love and support of my family.

I was hoping that by now,

Lynn's family would be supportive of her

And would be on her side, helping her with her transition.

However, that is not the case,

And lynn is still alone in this journey,

And it's just very unfortunate.

How are things going? You good?

Like, half the time, I'm not even home,

So I'm just, like, working.

Do you, like, present there, or do they not know?

My managers know. I just came out to them a bit ago.

So, like, I am gonna present gradually and more.

That's awesome.yeah, that's good.

Remember when you were growing out your hair,

And it was getting longer?yeah.

Why'd you cut your hair again?

It's hard to maintain.

It's so, so much easier to have it short.

If I could pass without having long hair,

I would cut it off, like, so quick.

Oh, I see jojo!

Hi! Hey!

Jojo is one of my new friends that I met at the mixer.

Oh, your hair is like --

It's making a run for it.yeah, it is.

She's transgender, as well,

And I want her to meet noelle and lynn

Because I think she's a really cool person,

And she just fits in with us.

Pshoo!

Noelle: so, like, if you don't mind me asking,

When did you come out?

I came out in -- about four years ago.

Did you always know

You were, like, a girl?mm-hmm.

I went to my mom when I was , and I asked her if --

I was like, "mom, can I go back to god and change suits?"

-Wow. -It was really, really cool.

My mom and my grandma are like my two parents.

I grew up with them.that's awesome.

Like, that's a nice thing to have, too,

'Cause, like, most people don't have, like,

The support from their parents.

Like myself.

It's, like, sort of a struggle

'Cause I don't really have anyone supporting me besides my friends.

It's hard. It's difficult.yeah.

It's really hard to see lynn facing so many struggles

And, you know, having a hard time

Finding the love and support that she deserves,

And I just feel really bad

And want to support her as much as possible.

Lynn: my mom is not even willing to help me with the, like,

Hormones in general.

I've had to scrape by with everything that i, like --

I get from my paycheck.

Lynn: my mom is really, like, against, like, me being trans

'Cause she's, like, really religious about it,

And she's like, "this isn't right. This is not how god made you."

And not having support from my family,

It's really hard, 'cause I really need the help.

I know. I want you to get those hormones, though.

That's so -- I know, like,

How important it was to all of us, and...

Right.

...i mean, you don't have to do it on your own.

I'm trying to think of something we could do, like,

Maybe, like, a fundraiser or something fun

That could help raise money to get those hormones.

I'm definitely willing to do that.

I'm just trying to think.

Oh, yeah, no.

What are good -- yankee candle?

[ Laughter ]

"You want a candle?"Yankee candle, no.

Apple cinnamon?[ Laughs ]

I feel really touched that jazz would come up with an idea like that,

And just knowing there's somebody there who cares

And is able just to be like,

"Let's do this together," it means a lot.

Noelle: one thing a lot of, like,

Organizations do whenever they need to raise money

Is a car wash.car washes, yes!

And those are usually so, so successful.

That sounds fun, too. [ Laughs ]

Jazz: I'm really happy and excited

That lynn agreed to accept our help,

And I feel like together, we can raise this money

And allow lynn to continue with her transition

And show her that she does have the support from friends.

Come on, let's start planning this, girls!

Lynn: is there gonna be food?

[ Laughter ]

Jazz: oh, my god! We have another customer!

It's for a good cause.

You call that a good cause?

You can't change who you are.

I mean, you're born a boy or you're born a girl.

♪♪

Jazz: alright, I was hanging out

With noelle and some other friends,

And I'm excited about this car wash

That we're gonna hold for lynn

To support her and help her afford the hormones.

Mm-hmm. I like the idea.

I think that's really nice of you to do,

And I don't think lynn has ever had anybody

Do anything like this for her.

I've done a lot of car washes in my day,

And to raise enough money for hormones

Is going to be tough.

Jeanette: so, how do you feel about hypnotherapy?

My biggest problem

Isn't about running or working out.

It's the food.

And my goal is that this hypnotist will help me.

I really am counting on this.

Jazz: people have been trying to help me with my weight loss

In ways that are unproductive,

And I am going for another hypnotherapy appointment

Because the first session really helped

And I saw the difference,

And I feel like she could continue helping me

To move forward.

Well, I haven't seen you in a while.

How are you feeling?

I'm okay. Yes?

Give me some sort of insights, feedback

As to what you experienced

After having your first session.

From what I recall, I did very well

The first week after the session.

I just felt very on track.mm-hmm.

I was eating healthy, working out,

And then I went to new york.

Okay.

And I ate a lot of unhealthy food,

And I came back home, and since then,

I've never really fully been back to where I was.

Alright.

Remember, it's a process.

I do want to...

Be healthy and feel better.

However, I also -- I'm not gonna lie --

I do love food, and I do love eating,

And part of me almost doesn't want

To let that go.ah!

And I feel satisfied in that moment and complete.

So the food is a means

Of you getting to that feeling of feeling good.

Mm-hmm.

Keli: when we have levels of discomfort,

We reach for things that give us comfort.

As she heals, it will be easier and easier

To release the emotions and the belief system

That's driving that behavior.

So, we're gonna be re-educating your subconscious

To help you to understand

That you don't need that for you to feel good.

So, what we can do is eye-movement therapy,

Which literally

Is a process that begins to rewire your brain.

Keli: as we know, binge-eating

Is a symptom of an emotional state.

The reason why I suggested eye-movement therapy

Is that it can rewire your brain

And help you to feel better in a pretty short period of time

So that, at an emotional level,

She can begin to respond differently.

Closing your eyes down

And just taking a deep breath.

If you had to gauge the feeling of feeling lost

That encompasses feeling failure, weakness,

Hopelessness, and needing to escape,

When it is that you binge,

On a scale from zero to --

Being very uncomfortable

And zero being not affected,

Not bothered at all --

Where would you gauge that feeling?

.

Now you can open your eyes.

And I want you just to look here, okay.

Look at me, and I want you to just focus on my fingers.

And now, just connecting

With that feeling of feeling lost

And the needing to binge to escape and feel better,

But just by following my fingers,

All of that is shifting and changing

Into feelings of feeling confident, in control.

Jazz: I definitely feel myself relaxing...

Being hopeful, being positive...

...listening to my thoughts more, observing.

...feeling loved %...

That allows me to feel more in control of my body

And feel present in the moment.

It really just was able to calm me down.

...moving into a new,

Healthier chapter of your life.

And just closing your eyes down, jazz.

So now, going back to your number --

Your number was a before.

Where is that number now?

Like a two. Mm.

A two feels so much better than a , doesn't it, jazz?

Mm-hmm.

If we did that,

We can make it even better, can't we?

Mm-hmm.

I don't know what it is about hypnotherapy,

But it definitely seems to be helping me.

I feel like after the session,

I get that boost and feel energized

And ready to move forward, push myself hard

Until I could reach my goals.

I just, like, forgot about all my problems.

♪♪

[ Knock on door ]

Come on in!

Where are you?

♪ I'm in the kitchen! ♪

Hey!

Hi. I'm cooking.

What are you making?

Well, mac and cheese, but it'sorganicmac and cheese.

So it counts towards your healthy eating?

Yes.

Pretty healthy.

There you go.

Jazz: I definitely think

The hypnotherapy session did work,

Because today I'm cooking

Healthy, organic, whole wheat, butter-free, milk-free

Mac and cheese,

And while it's not super healthy,

It's not, like, some cookies or pizza,

Or some other junk food, you know?

So, how are you? How have you been?

We didn't get to talk after we went go-karting.

Oh, I know. That was a lot of fun.

What did you think about victoria?

A lot of people are intimidated by me,

Or other times, like, they just can't handle me

'Cause I'm too much.

We'll see. We'll see.

She was a really cool person. I don't know.

After meeting victoria, I really liked her,

And I definitely want to hang out again in the future.

I really think she dug you.

You really think so?i really do.

See, I feel like she didn't, though,

'Cause I feel like she's out of my league, maybe.

She's totally not out of your league.

Yes, she is. She's out of my league.

She's so not out of your league.

She's totally in your league.

Jay and I were sitting there the whole time,

And it was, like,

It was third- and fourth-wheeling.

I guess I would have to hang out with her again,

But, like, I really did think she was awesome,

And I would hang out with her again if she'd be willing to.

I'm just, like, not confident enough.

I don't know.that's whyi'mhere.

I get to be the little voice in your ear

Telling you how awesome you are.

Fairy godmother.duh.

That's, like, your nickname now. You like that, right?

I do. I do. [ Laughs ]

I'm gonna make this happen.

Yay!

♪♪

Greg: this is nice that we're

Out for a little walk.jeanette: well, we need to.

We always say, "lets go for a walk," and jazz is always like, "no!"

Greg is always asking jazz to go for walks.

You always are. "Lets go for a walk."

So, finally, she said yes. You got your walk in.

It's a positive step -- literally.

What's happening with you socially?

Jazz: I was with michaela and jay,

And we went to this go-kart/arcade place,

And michaela wanted me to meet her friend victoria,

And it wasn't like a date or anything,

But, like, there was still that little...

Tension or that vibe.

Greg and I are very liberal

When it comes to dating and sexuality,

And I totally think that cisgendered women

Are much more open to dating trans people.

I really liked her a lot.

Unfortunately, there's a negative stigma

Attached tomendating transgender women

Because they think that people are gonna think that they're gay.

She's dated a lot of people,

So she has a lot of experience,

And that's one thing that worries me, you know?

When I asked how many relationships she's been in,

She was going like this.

Her fingers just kept...oh, geez.

...going and going and going.[ Laughs ]

I just -- I don't want to be another finger on her hand.

You know what I mean?

Jazz: when it comes to dating, victoria definitely has

A lot more experience than me, and it's kind of intimidating.

Some people are late bloomers, and it's okay,

And some people are not,

And that's just the way it is.

The older you get, the more likely

People are have gonna had other relationships.

Jeanette: I think it's wonderful that jazz has a little crush

On victoria.

Jazz sums it up best, saying she judges people

By the content of their character,

And if she sees somebody that has beautiful content,

Then it sounds like she'll be happy with them.

Jazz: I'm glad that we walked a bit,

And I got my calories b*rned, you know?

Yeah, you want to hear something interesting?

What?

Me and mom were out with grandma and grandpa.

Grandpa brought up an interesting idea.

What is it?

He wanted to do a family soccer match.

Including him and grandma?

He wants to support you in your efforts to get in shape,

And he knows that you love soccer and --

They're willing to get out there.

I'm so down for this just to see grandma play soccer.

[ Chuckles ]

So, how's school going -- your favorite place to be,

My brainiac child?

"Brainiac." I don't know.

While I appreciate education, I do not like school.

I have never liked school.

In the past, I've just had problems around new people.

I'm gonna feel like I'm the odd one out.

During lunchtime, I eat in the bathrooms

'Cause I have no friends at school.

Jeanette: come on. I know you're dying to go to school.

[ Chuckles ]

[ Snorts ]

I'm tired of talking about it. I'm just miserable there.

I feel like I need to make a change in my life.

What are you saying?

I mean, I've been looking into virtual school.

You need to be in school.

I'm sorry, but, like, school is school.

Jazz has been unhappy with school for several years,

But every year, we always get through it.

You just have two years.

Jeanette: to me, leaving high school is like dropping out,

And she needs structure.

But I don't want to have to be unhappy for two years.

Don't you think a lot of high school kids feel that way?

Yeah, and I'm sure they do, but a lot of high school kids

Don't have the added pressure that I do.

I've never been a regular child.

I live a very stressful life for a teenager,

And food is something that I just find comfort in.

It's stress-eating,

And I've been binge-eating more since the school year,

And I feel like, with everything going on in my life,

Virtual school will definitely alleviate a lot of my stress.

I visited my guidance counselor the other day.

I know I didn't really talk to you about this,

But she was saying that I could go to this virtual school

Where I could just finish my high school credits.

The fact that jazz has taken it upon herself

To go talk to the guidance counselor,

Jeanette and I are both definitely tripped up.

I really think that you should try

To finish high school inschool.

Hey, I'm just putting it out on the table

That right now, I'm not sure if I'm happy in my life,

And I just want a big change.

I understand why you may say no

Or why you may be hesitant,

But it's only fair if you at least consider it

And think about it.

♪♪

I can't even speak. I can't. [ Sniffles ]

I never pictured this in her future.

This is not the way it's supposed to go.

I don't know if I can handle it.

♪♪

[ Knock on door ]

Jazz: come in!

Hey!

Hey.

Hey.♪ Hi! ♪

Jazz: lynn, noelle, and jojo are meeting me at my house

To make posters for the car-wash fundraiser.

You want to see the ugliest poster ever? [ Laughs ]

It doesn't need to be pretty. No one cares.

Noelle: so, $ is the price?

The goal for the car wash is gonna be to raise $,,

And I think that's a very attainable goal.

$,? That means we have to wash cars.

Let's do it.

Can someone get started?

'Cause we got some work to do.

Jazz: it's really intimidating knowing that we have to put in

That much work and time

In order to raise this much money.

However, hopefully, we will get some donations to help us out.

It's like -- the fact that we're, like, coming together

In such a way just, like, so you guys can help me,

It means a lot.

Yeah.yeah, of course.

This isn't something that you need to thank us for.

Like, this is our job as your friends

To help you out, help you be happy.

And hormones, especially, are super, super important.

We're here for you. We got you.

Transitioning can definitely be an expensive process,

And while $,

Might not be enough to cover all of the medical expenses,

It will give her that boost she needs

In order to feel hopeful in this process.

I just spelled "hormones" wrong.

No, you didn't.

Yep. Forgot the "e."

"Hormons"! [ Laughs ]

When lynn is finally able to afford hormones,

She will be become happier because she'll know

That she is finally undergoing the process

That she's been looking forward to.

Also, the physical changes are pretty nice.

I can say that from experience.

And I think that's definitely something to look forward to.

Oh, my god. We suck at life.

What happened with that girl you met?

Victoria?

Michaela said that she's into me.

Like, she thinks I'm pretty, but, like...

Michaela said that?

Yeah, 'cause michaela knows her,

And, like, I really thought

She was very, very cute, so...

Ooh! Get it, jazz!yes!

Michaela is definitely playing matchmaker a little bit.

You know, she's helped to move things along

When it comes to my relationship with victoria,

And she's already set up a second hangout.

So I'm just glad to have a friend like her on my side.

Is this poster, like, flashy enough?

Jojo: that is adorable.

Jojo's is cute, too.

She got those little stickers.

And then, try not to get glitter everywhere,

But there's mine.

[ Gasps ] oh, that's just tragic.

[ Laughter ]

♪♪

Greg: we got to spend some time

Talking about this school decision.

I always pictured her graduating,

Giving her valedictorian speech,

You know, the traditional cap and gown.

I'm sad that jazz wants to leave school.

I never pictured this in her future.

I guess I'm old-school about school.

Like, you go, you're in a brick-and-mortar building,

You do your years, you graduate.

That's just the way I've always thought it's gonna be.

I just don't like the idea of her

Not being in school.

You know, I'm opposed to her locked up in her bedroom,

And, you know, she can do homework from her bed

And she can go to classes from her bed.

My fear is, you know, she's gonna be home

And it's gonna be really easy to slack off.

She could fall prey to just hanging out in her room,

Day in and day out, binge-watching tv and eating

And becoming more and more unhealthy.

There needs to be structure in her life.

You and I know that, and so...

I can't provide her structure.

I can't provide her what school does

Eight hours a day every day.

I have a life, too. I have things I have to do.

Yeah, it's gonna -- it's gonna affect you.

I will, if jazz decides to do this,

Have a new job where I have to be,

Like, the bad cop and get on her,

And, "have you done your work? What are you doing?"

It just takes on a whole new flavor and lifestyle for me.

What's on your mind?

I can't even speak. I can't. [ Sniffles ]

This is not how it's supposed to go,

And I wasn't prepared for this.

And this ismylife, too.

[ Crying ] nobody asked me or cared how this affects me.

And I have to make sure she's okay every day,

And it's gonna be draining.

You know, I'm not gonna force her to go,

But this is hard.

It's really,really, really hard...

[ Sighs, sniffles ]

...i don't know if I can handle it.

Part of being a mom is definitely putting

Your child's needs before your own.

If that's what's best for jazz, going to virtual school,

Then I will go with it, but I do have a lot of worries.

Greg: it has long-term repercussions,

And we don't want to rush into this idea,

But then again, I have to ask --

Could being so unhappy at school

Actually be part of jazz's issues

With her eating habits?

She's got different things going on,

So I'm entertaining this idea.

♪♪

Jack: and what areyouwearing, jazz?

You know what I see?

"Pizza rolls, gender roles"

And jazz rolls.

The jennings cup was over before it even began.

♪♪

Jacky: oh, that's a full field?

Jack: I don't know.this is a little smaller.

This is for us.

I want this one.yay, yay.

Can they make it the size of a dog cage?

I don't know.

Jazz: my whole family is meeting up for the family soccer match

That my grandpa came up with

Because he wanted to have everyone come together

To help me lose weight and be active.

♪ Hey, everybody, we're here ♪

Oh!

Oh, my god, grandma. What are you wearing?

My gym outfit. We don't approve?

No, no, I guess it works. It works.

And what areyouwearing, jazz?

You know what I see?

"Pizza rolls"..."Not gender roles."

..."Gender roles," and jazz rolls.

Jazz: so, I'm wearing this shirt that says,

"Pizza rolls, not gender roles,"

And obviously he was just trying to joke around and be funny,

But all I heard was

"Jazz rolls, jazz rolls, jazz rolls."

So, we're gonna get rid of those jazz rolls.

Oh, my god.

Greg: I just actually thought the jennings cup

Was over before it even began.

Jazz: that was a distasteful joke,

But you're lucky I don't care.

That wasn't necessarily the nicest thing to say.

However, I don't want to make it a big deal

And ruin this entire family soccer day,

And I just want to move past it and have a good time.

I thought it was appropriate and clever,

But I do apologize.

Jack: that's not the way I like to operate.

I don't normally like to make fun of people's body parts.

Griffen: grandpa and jazz, you guys should pick teams.

Sander: why don't we just do these as the teams?

How about just do this?

That's it. That's it. Me and the ladies!

Alright, we're starting this game off!

Grandma!

Yeah! Grandma!

No, grandma, our team!wrong team!

Grandma, grandma, grandma!

How do you feel being out on a soccer field,

Since you've never done any sports at all before,

Other than bowling?ridiculous.

And listen, for the love of the family,

I'm giving it truly my best sh*t.

Jeanette: take out ari!

My grandma is a fish out of water on the soccer field.

Aah!jazz: score!

Griffen: goal!good job, grandma.

She doesn't even like being outside during soccer games.

She has to stay in the car to watch

So that her hair doesn't get ruined

And she doesn't sweat,

So the fact that she's participating

Just is really awesome.

Sander: good, good, good!greg: it's the wrong way!

Right here, right here.

Jack, to your wife!

Jack: to you? You're on the other side.

That's right.

Greg: jeanette, just sh**t, just sh**t.

Relax, relax, relax.

I can't sh**t!hold on. Relax.

I can't! I can't!stop, stop.

Jeanette: I got nervous, and I kind of choked.

I was out there, and I really wanted to do my best,

And I wanted to show that I had some grain of athleticism

Somewhere deep within

And, like, just to air a ball like that

Was not a good feeling. I felt so stupid.

Greg: don't be so hard on yourself.

Most people are not great athletes.

I would have liked to have shown I hadsomething.

I tried.

Griffen: oh, jazz!

Jeanette: jazz looks fantastic out on the field.

All the moves are there.

She's even going fairly quick

For somebody who's got a little extra weight on her.

You know, me, I just look at her like, "wow. She's great.

I made that person."[ Chuckles ]

Jazz: you got me on...griffen: go down there!

Aah!greg: oh, that's trouble.

Jazz! Oh, geez.

Yes! Yes!griffen: gooooaaaalll!

In between the legs!

Greg: jazz drilled a sh*t past me,

And I couldn't do anything about it.

I got b*at, and it was a really good sh*t,

And I could see it in her eyes, the competitive juices flowing.

I just knew that if jazz wanted to,

She could pick up the sport any day.

Sorry.

Jacky: come on.

Griffen: keep running, keep running!

Yeah! That's beautiful!yes!

Beautiful.greg: nice sh*t.

No, that was a good sh*t.

Sander: it was awesome to play against her

Just like when we were little, and she played very well.

She's still pretty damn good.

Jacky: yes! Beautiful!

Knowing that my entire family has my back

Just means so much to me.

I'm glad that we were able to all play together,

And grandma and grandpa

Got to play soccer for the first time.

You're not rusty.

Jeanette: jazz, you're amazing.

You juked him out. You juked him out...

She was on my team!...and you juked him out.

I know, but she was still...how'd she juke me out?

Greg: it was really nice to have the whole family together

To encourage jazz.

Even though we were two different teams,

We're really all together for the common cause,

Which is to love each other

And to help jazz in this journey.

Can we officially announce the mvp...

As grandma!

[ Cheers and applause ]

♪♪

♪♪

Noelle: okay, I got the donation box.

Today is the day of the car wash,

And I'm just glad to have a whole team

Ready to support lynn and raise money

To help lynn with her transition.

How much are we trying to raise, like, money-wise?

$,, Boo.

$,. That's a lot.

Is the hose even on?

[ Shrieks ]

[ Laughter ]

I'm so sorry, noelle.

Noelle: I think lynn is really lucky that she has a lot of friends

Who are like-minded and willing to help her.

I think that support can go a long way in her transition,

And it can really help her reach her goal of happiness.

We got this!whoo! Yes!

I have faith in us.we got this!

Whoo! Come on!

Yay! [ Laughs ]

Jazz: we have a customer?jojo: we do.

Alright.here you go.

You're the face.

Hello. How's it going?

It costs $, but we also accept donations,

And you can stay in the car if you want.

Here's $.

Thank you.

And there's $.oh, thank you!

Thank you so much! Guys, we got $ donation!

Friends: whoo!whoo!

Alright, we're gonna make your car extra clean now.

[ Laughter ]

♪♪

Jojo: oh, my god! It's my mom!

No way.your mom's here?

Yeah.

Hey! Hi.

It costs $.

Oh, thank you f--but it's a $.

This is $?

Yes! $ Donation!oh, my -- lynn,

Whoo!my mom gave $.

Thank you so much.

-Whoo! -Whoo!

It just means so much to me to see everyone come together

To see lynn happy

And allow her to be the person that she always has been.

Jazz: oh, my god! We have another customer!

Everybody, this is my dad.

Hello!hey!

How are you?good.

And he wants us to wash his car.

Awesome.

Thank you!

Jazz: it's so great that we are getting donations

And raising money quicker for this good cause,

And I really feel like we could reach the goal

Of $,.

So, this is for you. Make your dreams come true.

Thank you so much.

Be the best person you can be -- seriously.

This is for you.thank you.

I wish you the best.

It means so much. Thank you. [ Sniffles ]

♪♪

So, we should start starting, right?

It's still, like -- I still really can't process it

Because it's, like, so many people are coming together just to help me.

Usually, a lot of people don't help me in my life.

I usually have gone through this just by myself

Not having support from my family.

To think so many people would help me just blows my mind.

[ Sniffles ]

[ Sighs ]

Jazz: guys, we've reached $!

What? Whoo!

We're / there! Whoo!

Jazz, I think we have another customer.

Jazz: hello!lynn: hello. Welcome.

I saw you're doing a car wash.

Yeah. Yes.

What are the donations for?

It's for my friend lynn here.

She's transgender, and we're trying to raise money

For her hormones, so it's for a good cause.

You call that a good cause?

Why would you support her doing that?

This is who she is.

You can't change who you are.

I mean, you're born a boy or you're born a girl.

Hello! Hi.

What are the donations for?

It's for my friend lynn here.

She's transgender, and we're trying to raise money

For her hormones, so it's for a good cause.

You call that a good cause?

I mean, you're born who you are.

Noelle: yeah, and she was born as a trans girl.

Yeah, she's born as lynn.no, she was --

This is who she is.

You can't change who you are.

I mean, you're born a boy or you're born a girl.

Jazz: hearing this just makes me super upset.

Like, if you don't support us, fine,

But you don't have to say it.

You could just leave and go and not get your car washed.

That's okay.

But the fact that he's just spreading his negativity --

Like, get out of here. This is not wanted.

We are just living our lives as who we are,

We love ourselves, we embrace who we are,

And we wish...you don't love who you are.

...that you could embrace us, too.

You were born a certain way, and you don't love how you were born, apparently.

Don't tell me if I don't love myself,

'Cause I know who I love, not you.

You don't, because you changed.

I think you should go. I don't think you're welcome...

I think I should go, too....here at this car wash...

And I wouldn't give my money, anyway.

...'Cause this is a community embracing love,

And you're not here to give love.

Jojo: we love ourselves!

I'm so used to hate and judgment at this point,

It doesn't even faze me, but it does hurt me to see

When other people are affected by hate.

Thatissomething that does get to me.

Jazz: we're raising money. We're doing good,

And that person is not here to dampen our day.

Oop! [ Chuckles ]

Jazz: we are gonna have a great time once again,

And I feel like lynn just knows that the positivity and love

Is stronger than this one guy who is saying hateful things.

Alright, so, we totaled it out.

It was a total of bucks.

We didn't make $,, but we did a great job,

And I'm really proud of ourselves.

I really want to thank you guys for, like, doing this for me.

It means a lot, like, making this goal.

And it's just, like,

With this money, I can finally be able to,

Like, do things I really need to do.

Yes!

-Yo, group hug. -Group hug!

Lynn! Whoo!lynn: [ chuckles ]

♪♪

Jazz: do you guys want to sit over there?

Jay: sure.

Michaela: this is gonna be a challenge.

I think right here is perfect.

Let's get the towel out.

Last time I saw victoria was at go-karting,

And I had a really good time with her.

I thought that we could really be good friends

Or maybe even something more than that.

Hey!

Hey. Hey.

And now we are about to have our second hangout, at the beach.

Victoria: girl, it's windy.

This needs to get away from my face.

You have a ponytail holder right there.

That's -- that's not cute.

Not cute? Okay.that's not cute.

Jay: your hair doesn't look bad, though. It looks nice.

Aw, thanks. I try.

Beach hair.

Victoria is a really awesome person,

And I'd like to hang out with her one-on-one.

I just feel like me and her alone

Would allow me to further dive into

Who she is as a person,

And we could see where it goes from there.

Wait, so, is that, like, a real tattoo or is it --

Yeah, it's real.what is it?

It's a fibonacci spiral,

Which is, like, this thing in math.

You know "the great wave,"

The art piece that's, like, japanese,

And there's, like, a wave like...

[ Whooshes ]...like that?oh, yeah.

That follows the same shape, so it's cool

'Cause I like art and I like science.

Did you say you like art and science and not math?

I suck at math.

Oh. See, I'm the opposite.

I'm really good at math, but ihatemath.

I wish I was good at math.but I love art and science.

Yeah. What about you? Do you want a tattoo?

Oh, hell to the yes.

I want it to be like what michaela has.

She has one going down her body.

And then I want, like, one on my back.

You see this patch, like, with cats right there,

The yin-yang?

I might do something like that

But with k*ller whales 'cause they look --

k*ller whales look like the yin-yang sign,

And they really are, like, harmonious and peaceful creatures

'Cause they live in their, like, pods,

And they love each other.[ Coughing ] k*ller whales.

No, they're not K*llers!

Victoria: hanging out with jazz is super natural to me.

You can, like, kid around with her,

And she'll understand, which is awesome.

A duck walk. Let's try duck talk.

[ Imitates donald duck ]

[ Laughter ]

I said "hello."That was so bad, bro.

Oh, my god, no. That's awful.

Jazz: I'm not sure ifshefeels like we're connecting

Or if she thinks that this situation is awkward.

I have no idea what's going through her head,

And it's kind of hard to tell, so I'm just gonna have to guess

That she likes me and that she --

I don't even know! My head is everywhere.

Well, I really have to pee,

So if somebody wants to venture with me

To try and find a bathroom...it's so far.

You guys got to go?michaela and jay: yeah.

Jazz: when michaela and jay say that they need to go to the bathroom,

I basically just roll my eyes.

I feel like it's so obvious that they are trying

To set victoria and I up and have us talk one-on-one,

And [sighs] they're just so lame.

Oh, no, I can't lay down

Otherwise, I'm, like, literally a beached whale.

[ Laughing ] no, that's awful.

Iama beached whale.

Nah, definitely not.

Right now is the only opportunity

I will have to ask victoria out in person,

And I feel like I need to capitalize on this moment.

Um...i had a lot of fun with you

At, um, go-karting.

Yeah, it was fun, but...

Um...would you want to hang out again --

Just, like, you and me?

♪♪

Yeah, for sure. Definitely.

It could be fun. Yeah.

I am honestly just so ecstatic.

I was afraid of being rejected,

And I'm just happy to get to know her more,

And I feel like something good could come out of this.

I feel like her friendship is really meaningful to me,

And hopefully, it could lead to something even bigger,

Which is, you know, a romantic partnership.

♪♪

Next time on "I am jazz"...

I just need to lose another more pounds.

Keli: today, we're gonna switch up a bit.

We're doing some past-life regression.

Keli: past-life regression,

It's an accelerated healing opportunity.

I'm hopeful that we can connect some dots,

What has been fueling her binge-eating.

I don't think my family wants me.

How did that make you feel?

I don't want to live anymore.

We've been talking about virtual school.

I think it would alleviate

A lot of the stress and pressure.

[ Voice breaking ] it's almost like everything I do in my life

Is for other people.

I'm really just trying to do things for myself

Just soican be happy.

She's hurting.

I just got a text.

Oh, my god. It's victoria!

She said, "I'll pick you up."

That's awesome!

I feel like victoria would be the type of girl

Who would make the first move.

I'm gonna hold back and let her do it.

Jazz: I really like her.

I really have hope for this relationship.