07x06 - Private Parts

[bunniefuu]

[Jazz]Previously on I Am Jazz...

[woman] Run, run, run, run!

-[woman] No, no. -[man] Jazz, keep going.

[Jazz] Nope.

I'm definitely having a really hard time having all this extra weight.

I can't do so many incredible things with my body

that I used to be able to do.

[nutritionist] A typical morning's breakfast?

I usually get maybe a donut or two and then maybe two bagels,

three hash browns, hotcakes, or an Egg McMuffin.

I'm gonna have you hop on my scale right over here.

All right, hopefully I didn't gain weight.

[nutritionist] ..

I don't judge her by that, but it's a little scary.

-Good morning. I love your necklaces. -Thank you.

[Sander] Hope is a Black trans woman that I met online.

We are both doing advocacy work on social media.

I wanna hang out with Hope in person.

I definitely think it's about damn time that we actually hang out

and do something fun.

Let's do it!

I mean, I'm definitely in for that.

I've never dated a trans woman,

but Hope just has this radiant personality,

and I want to get to know her more.

So are you excited for your date?

Yeah, it's gonna be a good time.

I saw a picture of her, and she's very, very beautiful.

[Sander]I'm going into this date like I would any other date.

But I know people might say,

"Sander, you're gay because you're going on a date with a trans woman."

♪ Wanna wanna make it ♪

♪ Wanna wanna make it ♪

♪ A nostalgic memory ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

Today, I'm finally meeting Hope for the first time.

And the nerves are definitely starting to strike.

And I don't know if I should be on my phone.

I don't really know what to do because I haven't been on a date in a while.

And it's my first date with a trans woman.

Hey!

-What's up? -How are you?

-How are you? -Awesome. Mmm.

-Nice to finally meet you. -Same. In person.

[Sander]Hope walks in, and she's a little taller than I thought she would be,

but just like she did on the Zoom, she's definitely glowing.

I haven't been ice skating in, like, two years.

-So... -I tore my ACL,

and I haven't been ice skating since before that.

So don't have any shame in the fact

-that you're gonna be with the worst ice skater. -[laughs]

-But, yeah, let's go get some skates over here. -Okay. Awesome.

I've been here scoping out the place to make sure I know

where the snack bar is, where everything is.

That's the most important thing. Where are the snacks?

Well, actually, the most important thing for me is where the emergency is

-if I hurt myself. -[chuckles]

Sander is so cute. [chuckles]

[Sander] We need some skates.

-I'll do a . -I'll do a .

-[woman] ? -[Hope] Yes.

He is this little ball of geeky juiciness. [laughs]

That's the best way that I can put it.

[Hope] You ready? Whoo. Whoa. Whoa. [chuckles] I'm gonna fall.

Okay.

Here I go!

-Wait, I love, like, your arm movements. -Look how good...

-Wait, it's the wiggle. -Wiggle dance.

I can't keep... I don't know how to turn.

[Hope] Oh! [chuckles] I'm, like, trying not to be the first person to fall.

He doesn't mind being goofy.

He doesn't mind being a ham.

Oh, yeah, we're doing it.

I just think that that's super sexy and cute.

-I'm trying it. Ah! [laughing] -Oh, you. Oh!

-[chuckles] Are you okay? -Yes.

-Help up? -Ah!

-One of us had to go down. -One of us had to.

-I almost went down right after you. -[chuckles]

[Sander]So far, the date is going great.

Hope and I are jelling really well.

And it feels natural, just like it did online.

Having fun and enjoying the moment.

It's a good first date.

[laughs] Whoo!

I'm ice skating!

You got it, Sander! Come on. [laughs]

This date with Sander is super refreshing.

It hasn't had that tinge of awkwardness

where I feel like the person that I'm with is looking over their shoulder

constantly wondering if other people know that I'm trans.

Okay, I'm tired.

-We gotta stop. -I think I'm good. I just almost ran into...

We gotta stop. [laughs]

I was able to just be a girl doing something with a person

and enjoying that without wondering

when my transness was gonna ruin everything for us.

[Sander] That was awesome!

[Hope] And you did better than me because you didn't fall.

[Sander] All right, well, drinks still on me.

Sander really made me comfortable

in a way that I haven't been comfortable on a date in a really long time.

-I hope you actually had a good time. I did. It was-- -No, I did.

I don't think I've done something this carefree in a while.

[Sander] I feel you.

When was the last time that you had a good date?

So the thing about that question

-is I feel like I've never had a bad date. -Mmm.

For me, I like to start at, like, the friendship level,

like, get to know someone and not rush into things.

And so, that's where my head's at, and that's what I've been doing.

I enjoy it much more than in the past when it was just like,

"Hey, let's hang out. Oh, come over. Let's come to my room."

-And then, like, the next day your kinda, like, both just... -"What happened?"

...in this space, like, we did that. [bleep] went down.

I don't even know anything about you.

That doesn't make me feel good.

Same! Like, I'm tired of being in those situations.

So I watch Jazz, obviously, and how she dates.

She wants to find love, but she won't go on dating apps.

She won't do anything. She doesn't really put herself out there.

So I'm just curious.

For you, how has been, like, as a transgender woman dating?

It sucks. [chuckles] Um...

[sighs] When I meet guys in person, a lot of the time,

men think that they can handle it, and so they can.

A lot of men are, like,

"Oh, you know, I can deal with this, and it's fine,"

when you're just going to, like, the movies

or, like, when you're going to dinners and things are, like, dimly lit,

or, like, there's, a bunch of people in the space.

But, like, when I would ask to meet your friends

or, like, you know, go to this party.

And I was like, "Oh, can I come with?" And then it's, like, "Oh."

That's when the realization kicks in that you're with a trans woman.

And so I just have to be a lot more selective

about the amount of time that I spend with people.

And then also be really intentional about where I am

and being really honest with myself and the people about that.

Like, I never saw myself wanting to get bottom surgery,

but now, it's like a huge part of things that I really want to do.

I told Sander about my bottom surgery and my desire to get it

simply because we've been talking for a while now.

And, honestly, he has built a space of trust in my heart and in our friendship space

and whatever that evolves into.

And it just felt like if I want him to be vulnerable with me

I wanted to do the same thing in return.

And I felt like this was my olive branch

of letting him know that he has a safe space in me.

I was never gonna ask.

And I appreciate that you were able to kinda, like, share that with me.

It's your experience, so the fact that you're sharing

that experience and letting me in, means a lot to me.

I never would ask a woman or man

if they've had the bottom surgery or top surgery

because that's their business.

And it's inappropriate to ever ask someone that.

But in terms of the physical component of a relationship,

for me, honestly, touching or feeling that body part

is not what I'm attracted to.

This is definitely unique situation.

And I'm not sure what to do because I know there's chemistry there.

♪ I've been waiting For days like this to come ♪

♪ When I can give you Everything you want ♪

-Hello! -Hey!

-How are you? -Good. How are you?

Oh, no, I don't like this already.

-You excited? -No.

-But I need this. -Yes, this will be good.

[Jazz]So far, I haven't been doing great with my weight loss journey.

It's really concerning, and it makes me wanna do more and push myself harder.

And that's why I'm working out.

I see Laney setting up all these different exercises.

Immediately in my brain it's just like, "Oh, fricking, no."

Laney has been my friend since the beginning of it all.

She is a college basketball player.

She's playing trainer for the day,

coming up with different exercises.

I barely lost any weight.

-Really? -But first, I gained a couple pounds

and then I lost it back.

I'm just... I don't know. I'm not where I wanna be yet.

But we'll get there.

At least, you're motivated though.

-You're motivated... -I am motivated.

-...and that's half of it. -I want to lose this weight.

-Yeah. -I wanna be back in the s.

Like, I should not be over pounds.

pounds.

We'll get there.

-We'll get there as long as we're motivated. -We'll get there.

I did just visit a nutritionist,

and she's helping me, like, set things straight.

That's great!

-And, like, figure out my meal plan, but... -Yeah.

...it's just really hard to, like, follow everything that she introduced

when I've been eating like [bleep] for so long.

I think the biggest part of changing your body and changing your life

is the mental aspect.

And I think Jazz's motivation is on and off.

I think some days she wakes up and she's excited to work out.

But if you work out for minutes or an hour

and then eat , calories a day,

your body's not gonna make any progress.

My goal is to help her get back on track with eating and working out

because I know how much that helps other things going on in your life.

There's Lynn!

-[Janey] Hi, Lynn! -Hi, guys.

[Jazz]I'm so happy that my friend, Lynn,

is able to work out with us today

because I haven't seen much of her over the past few years.

She was going through her own development in her transition,

and then I had mental health issues, and COVID came.

But I am just in awe because she's come so far

when it comes to her transition.

She just looks a lot different than how she used to look.

She looks amazing!

So what's the play today?

[Laney] All right, we're gonna start on the rowing machines.

And then we'll go to weighted slams,

then we'll do kettlebell swings,

and then we'll finish with box jumps.

Box jumps?

-Yeah. -Is that big box for you?

We're gonna stack three boxes just for you.

-Just for you. -That would lead to an epic wipeout.

I would do it just so you guys can laugh at me wiping out.

-[Laney chuckles] -[Jazz grunts]

I'm really excited for this work out we're about to do.

[Laney] Put your foot all the way in.

[Laney]It's a little more intense.

[Jazz whines] Oh, I don't like this already.

I think the different workouts will help her stay motivated.

All right, it's legs, core, arm,

and then it's arm, core, legs.

And you lean all the way back and you go all the way forward.

[Jazz panting] Whoo.

[Jazz exhales]

Pull your arm all the way to your chest.

[Laney] Do you feel it?

[groaning] Oh, so weak.

[Jazz groans]I can't do this.

But I can, and I'll try. But I can't.

[Laney] All right, ball slam.

You go up. You get on your toes. You slam it down.

Right? And then you catch it.

-[Jazz grunts] -And then you got ten just like that.

This is hard.

[Laney laughs]

[Jazz]This is embarrassing because when I was younger I used to be so dominant.

Like, when I played soccer, I was the best.

When I ran the -yard dash, I ran the fastest.

And now it's like, "We're humbling you."

[panting] I just need a breather.

[exhales]

-[exhales] Whew. -[Lynn] Yeah.

You could do that high?

[bleeps]

-[Laney] You ready? -Yep.

[Jazz] All right, that was ten!

-[Laney] Ten? -Yep.

[Laney] You're good.

Oh, thank you for doing this with me, though.

-Of course! -I need this.

-Even though it's hard and I'm struggling, -Of course.

-like, I need to start somewhere, you know. -Yeah.

She really did push herself, and I'm proud of her.

-Yeah, I feel really, really good. -[Laney] Yeah.

Do you wanna keep on going

with, like, work outs like that eventually when comes to, like, routining?

I guess.

I wanna get cardio in at least, like, five days a week.

Yeah, and your workout's done for the day!

Done for the day.

It means so much to me that my friends are here by my side

supporting me to lose this weight.

You know, they've known me for so long.

They've seen me fluctuate, go through every shape and size.

But they've never seen me let myself go to this point,

where I weigh what I weigh now.

They assure me that I'm beautiful not matter what size I am.

But most of all, they assure me that if my ambition

is to lose weight and be healthier

that they'll be by my side and help me with that.

-Do you guys wanna clean up everything... -[Laney] Yeah, let's head out.

...and head out of here.

[Lynn] Yeah, no, of course, yeah.

-[Janey] Head out. -[Jazz groans] Oh, my back.

I had sex once, but it wasn't, like, real.

There was penetration, but...

Then you had sex.

-[screams] -[Jazz] Oh, my God!

When Peppermint comes in, you know she is in the room.

One of my first kisses ever was a trans woman,

but I hadn't shared that with anyone until recently.

Why didn't you?

I feared judgement. I feared hatred.

That meant you were ashamed of it.

Well, I guess maybe that is ashamed.

What else is it?

♪ No matter how far away it seems ♪

♪ I know I can have my wildest dreams ♪

[Jazz] Thank you for getting the smoothies.

Yeah, it's healthy. It's tasty.

And it's good 'cause I just worked out today with my friends.

minutes?

It was more than minutes.

Actually, no, it was like minutes.

[Jazz chuckles]

It counts, but I'm not gonna tell you

that I'm above the moon proud of you, because,

-honestly, I think there's-- -We need to see some results

I haven't lost any weight yet.

-Because you still have... -Eating issues.

Eating issues, but, you gotta also remember,

I have high standards and I hold us all to really high standards.

There's room for growth is what you're saying and I agree with that.

That's why we're here at a smoothie place instead of eating chicken wings.

Mmm-hmm.

So, I was talking with Laney and Lynn and you know

that Laney's very active with the Black Lives Matter movement.

And I was just, like, I wish there was more I could do to support

Black trans women because,

trans women are getting m*rder*d, Black trans women are getting m*rder*d...

-No one's talking about it-- -...at alarming rates.

And people don't talk about it enough, and it's just so...

I don't know, I just feel like there's so much more we could do to

make a difference.

[Jazz]I've been thinking about doing something like this for a while now.

Much of my work has focused on the more broad trans umbrella or transgender youth.

However, I really wanna focus on Black trans lives, because they need

their voices to be heard.

But now that I'm finally stable enough mentally

I'm ready to do bigger projects and hopefully make an impact.

It's just so important that we do something for this because this community

needs it, more than any other community.

I've felt the same way, I try to be this ally to everyone

and, the one community that I've had trouble

kinda coming up with content ideas and ways to help

is the Black trans community,

-just because-- -Yeah, we're white. [chuckles]

We can't relate to the Black experience.

But that doesn't mean we can't help.

We just need to have some sort of rally or event that focuses on Black trans lives.

Yeah, I think this event could be huge and could be a great idea.

And we need to do something big.

We just need Black trans voices.

I mean, I think I have a lot of people,

-who I'm friends with. -Like who?

-Guess who's coming to town? -Who?

-Peppermint! -Oh, Peppermint!

Yeah, we haven't seen each other in a really long time since our last trip.

-And I called her and I'm like... -I love Peppermint.

Peppermint has such a sweet heart.

[Sander]Peppermint is the best, she began as Jazz's friend.

Oh, honey, did somebody order some drag?

Honey, where's the drag queens?

-Oh, hello, gorgeous! -Oh, my God!

[Sander]But now has grown into one of my best friends.

She and I just get each other on a different level

And I feel like we both have such unique perspectives on life

and are willing to share them to each other.

She wanted me to come to New York with her, but I'm like,

"I can't right now, but you could come to Florida

and she was like, "You know what, I haven't seen the fam in a long time."

So you think someone like Peppermint would wanna be involved?

I'd love to have her as part of this.

You probably will see her so you can bring it up to her.

I'm sure I'll talk to her about it.

You created the connection,

but me and her have been just hanging out.

And she's someone that I always confided in and always could

-help me talk through anything I'm going through. -Yeah.

Including stuff about dating.

Speaking of dating, I know you went on a date.

Uh...

We got along really well, I had a really good time. I think she is

an amazing human.

We had some pretty deep conversations, a lot of girls I meet--

Deep conversations?

-Yeah, a lot of g-- -What did you talk about?

Dating and where she sees herself, where she wants to go with dating.

She opened up about the fact that she hasn't

undergone the gender confirmation surgery.

Okay.

Which, obviously, I never asked.

Did it make you feel less attracted to her?

I've never had to think about it 'cause I've never gotten that close

with a trans woman where it's, like,

we've had these deep physical encounters.

Mmm-hmm.

I was just trying to get to know someone emotionally.

-Yeah. -And so,

that's what I did and I'm doing.

I'm not going to touch them below the waist,

I'm just not into-- That's not the genitalia I'm attracted to.

That's fair, that's completely fair.

But I still look at them as a woman.

[Jazz]I understand why it can be hard for some cis people

to date trans people.

I go off what I feel, if I really feel like

I'm building a connection with someone, then like,

I just embrace them for who they are.

And I'm not saying that Sander is not doing that,

but Sander is also not pansexual like me.

He is very heterosexual

and he's more about that physical attraction than I am.

I really want to find love and you really want to find love,

-but finding love-- -We both will one day.

But, like, I still have so much to explore when it comes

to my sexuality and getting sexual with a partner and I'm excited to explore that.

I've barely had sex.

I had sex once but it wasn't like, real.

-[chuckles] What? -Was there penetration?

Uh... Yes, there was penetration, but--

-Then you had sex. -[giggles]

Not every sister feels comfortable going to their brother about sex

and anything regarding sex,

but Sander and I have such an open relationship, he's like my best friend.

But, I don't know. I don't count it.

-You've had sex. -[chuckles]

[Jazz]It wasn't anything magical.

Not that it has to be something magical, but I just wasn't ready.

But then why'd you consent?

Because I thought I was ready, but I just wasn't.

So, do you think you're gonna see Hope again soon, or...

There's obviously some red flags there, like, that do worry me.

At the same time, like I said, I don't wanna close any doors

'cause I do think she's super cool.

I really think that, you know, even though she does have male genitalia,

Sander could have an attraction to her, she's very, very beautiful,

she's smart and she has an amazing personality, from what I've heard.

And I just really hope that he doesn't close the door on Hope.

Oh, Liam. Oh, my goodness.

[Sander] Miss Peppermint's about to be here.

[Jazz speaking]

[Jazz screams] Ahhh!

-Hello! -Oh, my God!

[giggles]

[Jeanette] If somebody were to ask Peppermint, like,

"Who is this boy that you hang out with, what does he mean to you?"

What would she answer?

Peppermint and I are pretty close.

We just have this really deep bond, like I would say,

I'd probably open up to Peppermint about some things

that I haven't opened up to anyone else about.

Wow.

We hang out in the hot tub all the time.

-[Jazz] Oh, wait! -We've had really deep conversations--

[Jazz] Talk about this! Back up!

-You hang out in the hot tub all time? -[Sander] Yeah!

So, this is like the first time we're actually gonna get to hang out,

in my city!

Your city? You mean your town?

-My town! -[chuckles]

Oh, she's actually pulling up right now.

[Jeanette] Bring her on in!

Peppermint lives in New York, but she's often traveling a lot.

So, we don't see each other that often.

But, we probably talk, once or twice a week

and we try to boost each other up.

-[Peppermint] What's up? -Hello!

-Hey. -How are you?

I just look up to her for everything.

I love Peppermint.

-Hello! -[Peppermint] Is anybody home?

-[screaming] -[Jazz] Oh, my God!

-Hi, gorgeous, hello! -[Jazz laughing]

-Hello, beauty. -Oh, my God,

I literally said that you were gonna scream like that.

-Hi! -[both laughing]

[Jeanette] So good to see you.

-Oh, my gosh, it's so great to see you. -You look gorgeous!

-Always, always so beautiful. -Thank you.

[Jeanette]When Peppermint comes in, you know she is in the room.

She is a breath of fresh air.

and she just commands the room.

-The Peppermint scream is just not the same over camera. -[Jeanette] Yes.

-[Sander] It's so much better in person. -[laughs heartily]

We all need some Peppermint in our lives, 'cause she is not a morning person.

I'm a little tired, it's okay, though.

I can record a Peppermint scream for your alarm, if you'd like that.

-[chuckles] -[Jeanette] Yes, yes, please.

[screaming] Wake up!

[all laughing]

[Jeanette] So, what are the plans while you're here?

-[sighs] -What's the agenda like?

There's so much to do, I'd love to go shopping a little bit.

[Jazz] I had this idea, actually.

I wanted to try out, like, wearing wigs.

-Wait, did somebody say wigs? -[all laughing]

-I wanna change my look and my style a little bit. -Yeah!

I don't know, I just want to be like a mini drag queen, kind of.

[Jazz]I just wanna try out new looks.

I'm a big fan of drag queens

and just seeing their extravagant outfits and their beautiful wigs,

I'm just inspired by that artistry that gender-bending artistry.

And I really wanna get into that a little bit more,

but I'm taking baby steps and the first step is to have some wigs.

Well, I am the perfect person to help you with that, honey.

-Yes, you are. -So let's go wig shopping.

-I would love that. -And get some hair.

And this is a great opportunity to pitch the idea of having

a Black Trans Lives Matter event to her.

And hopefully she's receptive, because to have

someone like her, who is so prominent in the advocacy field,

that would be amazing.

Like, more than one.

Yeah, I want colorful hair,

-I want like, pink hair and blue hair. -Oh!

And then long hair, I want hair all the way like, to the floor.

But it falls in the toilet if it's that long.

-[laughs heartily] -[Jazz] True.

-Yes. -No, if it's a wig, you take it off.

-Right when you're peeing? -Yeah.

There have been plenty of moments where I've...

put the hair on the hook for a minute.

-Put the hair on the hook. -[all laughing]

Sander. Shirtless Sander. There he is.

I just wonder if they've dabbled in the...

-wherever he dips his stick. -[laughing]

-[laughing] -[Kim] She just said that.

♪ Better be, better be ♪

♪ Better be, better be ♪

[Jazz gasps] Yes, they have colorful wigs.

-Oh, your-- -I'm looking for all different types of wigs.

Colorful wigs, short wigs, long wigs, I want it all.

You deserve it all.

[Jazz]For the past two years I've faced so many mental health challenges.

But, I'm opening a new chapter of my life by going off to college

and with that I feel like I wanna change it up a little bit, you know.

Why don't you sit down.

Okay, you wanna pick out a few for me?

-Yeah. -I trust you.

Whichever ones you pick, I trust.

-All right, here we go. -Oh-oh! I already love it!

What would your name be if this was your hairstyle?

Ruby.

Hello, Miss Ruby, hot.

♪ Miss Ruby is red hot! ♪

This is your airline flight attendant. [laughs]

I'm gonna snatch your wig.

-[both scream] -[Peppermint laughs]

[Peppermint] What do you think of the color?

I think I look like Storm. Lightning!

Oh, it has bangs?

I'm gonna go pick up the kids and then I'm gonna go get in a fight.

I look like my sister's boyfriend.

[laughing]

-[saleswoman] I like this one. -Ohhh!

[Jazz] This is a platinum blonde.

When it comes to wig shopping, this is all for fun, you know,

Peppermint is the perfect person to go wig shopping with.

And I'm just having a blast, you know.

-[Peppermint] This is pretty. -[saleswoman] This is a rich platinum blonde.

[Peppermint] We have to give this one a brush.

All right, this one I'm getting.

I really wanna talk to Peppermint about doing some sort of rally

or event for Black trans women.

I really want her to get involved in some way

because she's just, like, the perfect person for this event.

-Cute. -Yeah, you look really pretty.

Thank you, thank you for helping me today.

Girl, of course, I love hanging out with you and getting to spend some time.

So, there's something I wanted to ask you,

if I could pick your brain a little bit.

-If you wanna sit down for a second. -Yeah.

[Jazz] So, basically,

you know, my friend Laney does a lot of advocacy work

for the Black community, because on her basketball team she witnessed

a lot of racism. And we were talking about like, what can we do for,

not just Black people, but Black trans people.

So we were thinking of doing some sort of rally

where we were gonna gather a bunch of strong trans women of color

to come in and speak. And use their voice to help make a difference.

I'm really happy to hear you saying this because

a lot of people who are connected to LGBT rights and equality

and that struggle and even the plight of transgender people,

aren't always connected to what's going on in the Black community.

It is a problem that,

I think just people don't know how to get into the conversation

and haven't really been invited in.

Yeah, that's the hard part for me, it's like,

"Argh, I'm white, like, what do I say, what do I do?"

I wanna say the right thing and do the right thing, but...

Well, you can use your platform,

-which is what it sounds like you're trying to do. -Yeah.

-To get people to talk about these issues. -Yeah.

[Peppermint]The last year has taught us that activism is very effective.

But it needs to be the right messenger, in the right way.

The last thing that anybody wants is for something to come off as trite,

as performative, as fake.

And, to do this the right way, Jazz has to involve Black trans women

and has to involve Black trans voices

And the event has to benefit Black trans people.

Well, I know you're super busy all the time, but I was wondering if

you would be the spokesperson for the event.

I hope you can make it, because that would make the event

so much more important, because you're important.

Aw, thank you.

Well, I love this idea.

because a lot of times we are not involved...

-Absolutely. -...in the conversation.

So, whatever I can do, I will do to help.

I'm just ecstatic, like, she is the perfect person that we needed.

She's a prominent Black trans woman advocate.

I need to make this happen.

-Fist bump! -[both screaming]

This is an important project

and to take on something this big is definitely nerve-wracking.

I have a lot of hope that this rally is really going to start a movement.

-Let's try on some other wigs! -Okay.

[both whooping]

[Peppermint] Yeah!

-[Jazz] Hello! -Hello, gorgeous.

My two favorite people ever!

[screams]

Oh, yes!

As soon as Peppermint told me that she was onboard,

we got the ball rolling right away and we started

contacting people on social media,

reaching out to the Wilton Collective

to see if we could paint a mural on their wall, all of the above.

I think, no matter what happens, it's really important just to reiterate that

the mural, the event,

centers around Black trans voices.

-Absolutely, that's what it's all about. -And we wanna make sure--

But we wanna make sure that it doesn't just feel like

a bunch of people coming in to the area,

doing an event and then leaving.

I agree with Peppermint. I don't want this to be a one-time thing.

I want Black Trans Lives Matter to be a movement

that we continually talk about until the world has changed.

-Hello! How are you all? -Hey!

-Nice to meet you. -What's up?

So Julian on the right, Jack on the left.

-Nice to meet you. -Likewise.

I'm Julian Cavazos, I'm the founder of the Wilton Collective.

And the Wilton Collective is a collective of businesses

to create a workspace for LGBTQ youth,

but the majority of our youth, and this is just by chance, are trans youth.

So when I heard from Jazz that she wanted to come here

and create a mural on the side of our building,

I jumped on the opportunity.

This, is your wall.

-Wow! -This whole big wall?

-It's so big. -[Julian] The whole wall,

-from there to here, yeah. -[Peppermint] It's beautiful.

-Isn't it cool? -This is gonna be great.

I hope you have enough cans of paint.

We absolutely do, don't worry about it.

My name is Jack. Most of my art is usually portraiture

focusing on people that typically aren't seen.

So Black women, Black trans folks, Black trans women.

Do you have an idea for the wall?

We really wanna make it a focus to commemorate the folks that we've lost locally

and statewide.

-On the wall, if we can. -[Peppermint] Mmm-hmm.

I feel like a lot of people can see a headline and just scroll past it,

But when you're walking past someone, you see their eyes and their face.

It's harder to ignore.

I really, really think it's awesome that you're doing this.

And you obviously have a deep purpose and meaning behind it and that makes it beautiful.

And I think it's gonna be amazing.

Listening to Jack's vision for the mural,

I just feel like there was a lot of thoughtful intention put into it.

You know, they obviously know what they want to do.

And it's really just hitting me, like, this is real.

And I'm the glue, I'm like the one who has to make sure that everything runs smoothly,

everyone's voice is heard and that the event is wonderful.

I'm starting to feel the pressure now.

We're talking about trans women being women,

regardless of what surgeries they've had.

If I can't have sex with the person, could I see myself with them?

If you can muster it, it is a good idea for you to explore that.

Oops!

[Jeanette] I hear footsteps.

Oh, heavy footsteps.

Hello, look at you!

-You always look so hip-- -[kisses]

[Jeanette]Even though we're all under the same roof now,

in a couple of months, it's the plan to have all of my kids move out.

I'm going to be an empty nester, so i need to start getting used to it now.

-Hey. -Come on in.

It's hotter than the gates of hell out there.

-Hello. -Hi. How are you?

-I'm so glad you're here. -[Jacky] I want my hug, too.

I'm glad to be here.

I saw Jeanette about three weeks ago,

but Jacky, I haven't seen since before the pandemic.

-So, I have here ingredients for a cosmopolitan. -Uh-huh.

Oh, she's smiling already.

So, it's just great to see them and drink

and Jeanette and I do good at that.

It's likeSex and the City.

Oh, yes! Without the sex. [laughs]

I don't have a favorite, favorite cocktail.

But I do like vodka drinks and I do like sweet drinks.

♪ Cha-cha-cha-cha-cha, hey! Cha-cha-cha-cha-cha, hey! ♪

Which leads us down the cosmopolitan road.

Whatever happened to ladies getting together to have tea

and little sandwiches in the middle of the afternoon?

-Vodka is the new tea. Cheers to that. -Cheers to that.

I don't have the little sandwiches, but who cares?

-[Jeanette hums fanfare] -[Kim] All right, down the hatch. Let's see.

Oops! Oh, it's really good.

-Ooh! -Look at Jacky.

-Oh, wow! You really downed it. -I didn't mean to do that.

-Oh, my goodness. -[Kim] You didn't mean to.

I meant to take two big gulps, but it kept going.

[all chuckling]

Jeanette is so fun, it's like college.

When you put a drink in front of her, she just-- she just sucks it down.

I've never seen anything like it.

-I might as well just finish this. -[Jacky] You okay?

-I'm fine. -I'm gonna have to scrape you off the floor.

-I need that. -[Kim] Yes, you do.

-So, how are the kids? -[Jeanette] Good.

Sander went ice-skating the other day

with a woman and she's like this beautiful trans woman.

-Do you know her name? -Hope.

Oh, I like that name.

[Jeanette] He gets along very well with transgender women.

Because his dear, dear friend, Miss Peppermint...

-[Kim] They were at the drag show. -Geez, yeah.

Tell us about Miss Peppermint,

-we haven't seen her since the drag show. -Oh, my God.

-Peppermint is amazing. She is just a ball of fire. -[Jacky] A live wire, yeah.

So positive, so I think, come to think of it now,

that some of this rubbed off on Sander.

-They really clicked, they're just sort of like-- -[Kim] Their own friendship.

Yeah, they have this thing going on and it's, like,

an unusual friendship, but really cute.

Like they go skiing together and they go away on vacation.

I asked Sander, is there something there? And, of course he's like, "No."

But they are very chummy. As Peppermint would go like, "Chummy."

-She does this thing with her hands. -That's colorful.

Yeah, I just wonder if they've dabbled in the...

I have no idea what's going on with Sander and Peppermint,

or anybody else that he's with.

If he's really serious about any of this or not, he's gonna have to sort it out.

I just kind of nod and bob.

-Jeanette, is she staying with you? -She's in an Airbnb.

Sander was going over there to hang out with her and go in the hot tub.

Ooh!

Yeah, the two of them they really bounce off each other nicely.

-So I'm wondering if they're bouncing off each other. -I can see them meshing well.

I'm not sure you can go into that question.

-You know, it's not for me to pry, but I wanna know. -No. No.

[chuckling] I really wanna know what's going on with Sander and Peppermint.

I didn't know.

I mean, they're cute. She's awesome.

Both big personalities, would it work, would it not work?

'Cause big personalities...

[Kim] I'm on empty.

I think it would be kind of cool,

if something went on there.

-So, you're okay with Sander dating an older woman? -I-- You know what?

-I don't care who he dates. -Age doesn't matter.

-Men, women, trans women, trans men, I don't care. -Happy. Nothing matters.

-Nothing matters. -Age doesn't matter. Listen.

Wherever he dips his stick.

-[laughing] -[Kim] Oh. She just said that.

If Sander ends up with a cougar. That's what they call them.

I...

It has no effect on me whatsoever where Sander puts his head at night to sleep.

[chuckles]

[all chuckling]

-[doorbell rings] -[Peppermint] Coming!

-Hello! -Hey! Hi!

Welcome.

Welcome to the Airbnb. [chuckles]

-It looks nice. -Yeah, thank you.

You want some margaritas and guac and chips?

Oh, the good stuff. You know me too well.

We got a whole bottle of tequila? Oh, man.

-As always, get Sander trashed. -[laughs]

Does anybody have a problem with that?

-No. -I didn't hear anybody say anything.

I don't know what my relationship with Sander is. It's-- I mean, we're friends.

Sander and I are friends.

And I think it's an unlikely friendship.

-I made the guac last time and you made-- -That's true.

You know what? You're better at guac.

-And you're better at making me drinks. -So, let's switch.

-And then, I don't know how much alcohol I'm drinking so-- -I'll monitor it, don't worry.

Sander's good company, you know? He's equal parts party

as he is also open to having a lot of deep or sometimes very difficult conversations.

Oh, there's Sander. Shirtless Sander, there he is.

-Do you like my... tattoo? -Oh, my God! I love your tattoo.

How dare you? [laughs]

[squeals]

I don't think I've been in a hot tub since we were in a hot tub.

Me neither. That was the last one I was in.

There's chemistry there, for sure.

You know, Sander's not one of my girlfriends.

-[sighs in relaxation] So-- -Back in the hot tub.

Mmm-hmm, last time we were in a hot tub together was in the winter.

We sang, we danced. I think a few tears were shed.

And now, since then, a lot has changed.

-What's changed? -I don't know. I think that...

I've definitely matured, some of my mindsets have changed since then...

-Mmm-hmm. -...just about life.

I actually went on a date with a trans woman as well.

-Oh? Oh! Okay! How'd it go? -I did.

It went well. She was super cool, super awesome, like, we had a ton of fun.

Then she opened up to me that she hadn't received her bottom surgery yet.

And for me I felt like, if I can't ever really have sex with the person,

could I see myself with them? I'm not sure.

I know that, like,

non-preferred genitalia is [chuckles] an issue for a lot of guys,

but the truth is, the other part of sexual chemistry and connection

is about the chemistry in the room, who you're actually attracted to.

Do you have any advice for, kind of, me dating trans women?

Just try to cut yourself and her, or any trans woman that you're gonna deal with,

some slack.

Some guys are able to get past those, like, pre-conceived notions

of what body parts a woman should have.

And I know that's, like, off the wall for a lot of people.

It's very unconventional thinking.

But we're talking about trans women

being women, regardless of what surgeries they've had.

We're obviously not there yet, just in the world.

We're not there yet, for sure,

but, for example, one of y first kisses ever was a trans woman.

-But I hadn't shared that with anyone until recently. -Yeah.

Not because I was ashamed by it--

Well, now, why didn't you?

Okay, well, like I said, the same reason I wasn't the strongest ally,

for the longest time I feared judgement, I feared hatred.

-Mmm-hmm. -Which--

That meant you were ashamed of it.

Not that I was ashamed of it. I feared judgement.

Well, I guess maybe that is ashamed.

What else is it?

[Sander]I wouldn't say that people questioning my sexuality will affect me

moving into something physical with a trans woman.

But I have a few boundaries that I've set for myself

and I know that I'm...

I want-- I'm attracted to vaginas.

It's a really tough spot to be in.

Maybe you have so many barriers or so many blockades...

I can't help it, I just--

-Then it's not the time to go and-- -And that's valid.

Then it's not the time.

But what I'm saying is if you can muster it, push the envelope.

Because those other men around you, your frat brothers,

and the people around you, are afraid to do it.

[Sander]My emotions are all over the place right now.

After talking to Peppermint I realized that

there are some more things that I haven't thought about before.

I still am not sure how I fully feel about Hope.

I had a great time, but I'm still in this emotional headspace

where I'm figuring things out.

Since going on the date with Hope, I have a lot to think about.

-Hey! -Hey!

What's up? How are you?

Sometimes you'll have to think emotional first, if you wanna find that special someone.

[Sander]Every time I hang out with Peppermint, I have a lot to think about after.

Since going on the date with Hope, I've been a little bit conflicted

by the idea that she has not gotten her bottom surgery.

-Hey! -Hey!

What's up? How are you?

-I'm good. -Is that a new necklace I see?

Yes, one of my friends got it for me, it says, "Dope Black Girl."

-You're a dope Black girl so-- -[both chuckle]

And I actually wanted to let you know about an event that we are posting

for the Black trans community.

And I think you would obviously be a perfect person to come to the event

and come hang out.

So I wanted just to run the idea by you

and see if you had any interest.

I'm totally down for that. Anything related to that, I'm open to it.

Although Peppermint gave me a lot of things to think about,

the one takeaway that I really had is the idea

that sometimes you have to think emotional first,

if you actually want to find that special someone.

And it's not every day that you meet someone

that you connect with and emotionally open up to the way Hope and I have.

And when you come down maybe we can hang out and do something fun.

Aside from just this event, we can go bowling.

I would love to, that would be so fun. I would love to.

I was just going to chill next weekend, but this is honestly something fun.

And I would like to see you again.

Yeah, it's better than chilling.

Yeah, this is better than chilling.

[Sander]What if she's that great woman that I connect with on that emotional level.

And we'll figure out the physical things if we have to.

It could be a barrier, I just haven't reached that point yet.

But I can't close the door.

I gotta run, but I can't wait to see you next week.

All right, I'll talk to you soon.

-Bye, bye. -Peace.

I wonder what happened.

[Jazz]Next time on I am Jazz...

Peppermint invites Sander and I to come to her Airbnb

but she's not saying why she wants us to come.

I'm just gonna rip the Band-Aid off.

Hope is on her way, she also says that she has a surprise for us.

-Hey, everybody. -Oh, my God.

[Jazz]So, I see Hope, however I see TS as well,

And I'm, like, "What is going on right now?"

I had to see you in person, I've been watching you for so long.

My mom did a livestream with her where they discussed false rumors about

her saying that I suffer from mental health issues directly related to my surgery.

And that's just not true.

What the frick is going on?

I'm getting warmed up.

You're still gonna lose, Sander.

Hope is like out with Sander, for the second time in a row.

And I'm really trying to figure out, is this a date?

What is this? Hope doesn't just go out with just any boy and bowl.

You didn't have to put me out like that.

We're still kinda feeling each other out.

How deep are you feeling him out?

[laughs]