what are they doing here yeah Greg we
can't talk because this is officially
the Montgomery Finklestein weekend of
humor love each other k*ll each other
tight other off and pain each other blue
I don't care you were on your own Greg
and I are leaving
okay Dharma just just hit the gas gently
and let's see if we can get it rocking
stop stop are you pushing you know what
you need to break why don't you do this
in I'll push why not because if you
actually manage to push us all I could
never have sex with you again you know
the roads not that far away when all
this melts in a couple weeks we'll be
able to drive right on up there's a plan
yes this is a good time for me to
apologize for trying to get our parents
together and driving us off the road and
whatever else you got bring it on okay
guess I should give him a call and let
him know where we are
are you crazy didn't I come all right
I'll call triple-a home we're stuck on
the corner of snow and tree there's no
sign of them I don't know why you keep
checking not coming back maybe they were
afraid they might accidentally break
something and get yelled at are you
saying it is my fault that they left no
kitty he's not saying that because our
family doesn't indulge in the blame game
like you do me how you can take the
moral high ground when you're I give
nobody tells me what moral ground I can
be higher
the children are right we're a bunch of
babies I'm surprised they didn't
hightail it out of here years ago are
you saying that we've acted unreasonably
we have and they have certainly not on a
par I don't think there's a clear winner
but hang on to your ticket kitty now the
children love each other and it looks
like we're going to know each other for
the rest of our lives so let's just
figure out how to get along we've been
carrying stuff around for years let's
get it out in the open all right I'll go
first
there you'll see what the hell is the
deal with that ponytail how'd you go top
of the hill to get a signal but triple-a
says they'll be here within a couple of
hours I found their survival kit a tech
takes space food codex I think I can
carbonate the jerky for you I'm really
sorry about how my parents behaved I
think their belief that no one can
really own property makes them bad
houseguests oh my parents aren't exactly
the best hosts they're difficult people
to warm up to I know I never have every
moment of my life was turned into some
kind of protest the theme for my sixth
birthday party was us out of Central
America weird of gifts for my sixth
birthday my parents called me from
Tahiti to wish me a happy fifth birthday
I pointed this out my dad tried to
convince me to had something to do with
the International Dateline
with ice cream did you get the sugar
cone or the seaweed cone well your
parents are definitely out there but no
they were involved they were around if I
had to choose I'd go with what you had
what yeah I mean I might skip the
foreign-policy birthday parties in the
homeschooling and the hem pants but
schooling knit you turned out fine but
you know we're gonna have a family
someday and we're gonna have to figure
out what's best for our kids what
exactly is best for our kids all I'm
saying is that there are good schools
and I'm sure we can
find something that you'd be comfortable
with and what if we can't well I'm sure
we can send them to one oh wait let me
like to boarding school I went to
boarding school it's not the worst thing
in the world
excuse me are you the person who once
said boarding school is the worst thing
in the world my point here is that we
should keep our options open
except for my option wait I can't
believe you got us stuck in the snow I
wish the kids were in here without a
hell with them they're party poopers
wonders what to do
one wonders one wonder I love the way
you're talking Oh Veneto funny
it's in the room where the wine is let
me ask you a question all that free love
stuff in the 60s did it really go on or
was it all a lot of media hype those are
pretty wild time a lot of parties a lot
of naked bodies it's so hard to remember
the details
how do ribbon leaf I thought she dropped
a bottle of wine Marlene a woman that
was here from the SEC yeah I was ringing
a follow-up letter about our meeting in
us thinking about in closing a little
gift what size do you think she takes in
lingerie federal agent
so you see a federal agent and I see a
woman reaching out for love and
affection maybe a black lace Teddy
excuse me we're looking for a Peter
Cavanaugh that would be me Department of
Justice based on information we've
received we're launching an
investigation of Montgomery industries I
suggest a retained attorney relax Pete
they may just be reaching out for love
and underwear you warm enough yeah I
think I'm gonna turn off the engine for
a while there's no way to know how much
gas we have left without a gas gauge
yeah Larry took it out cuz he kept
getting it confused with the speedometer
what are you writing come back here I'll
show you so we both got so bent out of
shape about the homeschool private
school thing I came up with a better way
for us to work this stuff out Liz it
it's a hat full of parenting problems
I'll start okay our five year old wants
to sleep in our bed because he thinks
there are ghosts under his bed I would
let him I mean he may be manipulating us
but it could also be a real ghost what
would you do I don't want to play this
game yes
okay here's a good one
he's 14 he says he's going to ban
practice but then we're doing the
laundry and we find a ticket stub to an
r-rated movie well I see if I can get
the eight-track working
I say we apologize to him for not
creating an environment where he's
comfortable enough to tell us the truth
tell me you don't apologize to a child
who's lied to you
yeah well this is other choice we
obviously backed him into a corner oh
god I hope I found that ticket stub
accidentally hope I wasn't snooping
that's ridiculous okay we'll come back
to this one
Oh he just got caught shoplifting
kids a mess its shoplift
not if you punish them when they lie and
sneak into r-rated movies is that your
solution to everything come on kids need
boundaries it's probably all started
when you let him sleep in our bed after
he saw ghosts this is good okay Oh Greg
you're probably gonna want to sit down
for this one
now before I tell you let me just point
out that you got him the goldfish and
you got him the tennis racket
Oh
Judas Priest do you intend to stay out
here you'll catch your death and you can
stuff us and mount us on the wall with
the rest of our animal brethren that
would be quite the conversation piece we
should have opened the cheap stuff you
know how it is kind of cold larry i
stood beside you for your protest all
i'm saying is what if we jump back in
the hot tub warmed up a bit and then if
you still felt this way we could come
right back out here he can pierce his
eyebrows you're going to let him pierce
he's 18 they're his eyebrows until then
they're my eyebrows
you get a tattoo because he was over 18
and he was in the Navy school it was
boarding school and if you recall he
didn't go because you wanted him to take
a year off to find himself at 14 pick
another one okay
he's 16 years old he's very much in love
and he wants to borrow the car to drive
down to the beach so he and his
girlfriend can lose their virginity
together he told us this you still mad
at you for making him take back that
tuba well no to the car and the rest of
it is his business participate somehow
in this amazing beautiful moment in our
child's life don't believe me if we
participate it will not be a beautiful
movie attitude to the party we have a
problem here you don't believe in rules
you don't believe in discipline you want
this child to wander through his life
sleeping with this and piercing that
know by the time that we had children
you would come to your you'd come around
well I kind of thought the same about
you
Dhamma I think that the things that I'm
saying are very reason I think the
things that I'm saying are very
reasonable I can't raise a child like
what they don't what I don't think that
I can have a child with I'm still born
it's just cold
triple-a says we're still looking at
another our big spring storm okay
I also ran our situation by them and
they said that you shouldn't be so upset
that it was just a silly game you know
you actually would have run it by them
yeah cuz I'm the flakey open one who is
home-schooled and has no realistic
understanding of how the world works I'm
sorry don't be sorry for what you
believe it's what you believe look maybe
I was a little unbending in my approach
to the game let's try another one
he's trying to okay all right this is a
good one
our son has just finished his third year
of law school and announces he intends
to join the circus clearly this is his
passion he feels very strongly about
juggling or trapeze or what-have-you
absolutely I would encourage him to join
the circus provided that it is a circus
that is animal cruelty free
we'll never let your son join this
circus I might should have talked about
this a long time ago I don't think we
can fix this we can fix this we always
fix it we're out of gas
oh my bad Abby if the children come back
and you're dead I'm sure they're gonna
blame us for it
come inside are you ready to meet our
demands well we're not gonna take the
animal heads off the walls and bury them
we will give it on the thermos of hot
cocoa oh goody did you have hot cocoa to
the demand list yes because I was
outraged I will never let this rest we
did not even k*ll those animals
well well III did k*ll the moose how
could you Edward a proud proud moose we
pulled out your g*n and sh*t no no no no
he wandered out into route 6 and I came
around the curb and bam
the thing was a complete mess but the
head was good I am willing to compromise
since you are only responsible for the
death of the moose we will end our
protest if you agree to bury the moose
and bring some of those little
marshmallows you're never gonna get that
8-track working it hasn't worked in 20
years
of course Julie
shredding finds jammed come on help me
shred stuff watch CNN this is what you
do in a situation like this woman I
don't know he took some kickbacks we did
some insider trading why would you say
that
so she's sleep with me I can't believe
you're that desperate for sex believe it
come on Fred mother earth we return to
you one of your children or at least its
head welcomed him home cradled him in
your bosom comfort him
Edward you knew him best share something
lover
yeah what do you say at the we'll
be in Sarge this was a moose lived in
the woods and he loved it there he ran
around ate stuff
then one day he made the acquaintance of
a large German sedan probably had a lady
moose in the woods he cared for
maybe little ones probably had years
ahead of him until I came along BAM
he will be missed
I men should be here soon
want me to turn the music back on well
we should probably save the battery yeah
what I was just thinking about the first
time I was alone in a car with a girl
what about it I tried to be smooth
putting the seat back I broke my little
finger
how she never knew I told her there were
tears of joy Thanks
you know all the stuff that we put in
the Hat those were all problems you know
we didn't put any of the good stuff in
like he just got his first base hit in
Little League and he ran the wrong way
he waits for Thanksgiving until the
whole family's gathered to say his first
dirty word you know heatedly he just
figured out that frozen waffles fit
perfectly in the VCR he's pretending to
be a beagle and he's chasing cars at the
mail ministry he just found someone that
he loves more than he ever thought
possible he's getting married what do
you think we ought to do now what do you
want to do let's make a baby
no here
trip away we're okay never mind
all right we'll drive you into town and
you can you can get a bus from there oh
thanks
you know I'm sure that kids are back
home by now they can pick us up when we
get there it is late if you want to stay
until morning that that would be all
right
you're staying I'll get you something to
warm you up how about some brandy thank
you
some wine would be nice sure
ah see if we have any gallo Montgomery
yes
Department of Justice what's this about
we're here to serve you a subpoena for
an investigation regarding insider
trading and other SEC violations at
Montgomery industries oh thank God I
thought it was about the moose
for my 6th birthday party was us out of
Central America worst gifts for my 6th
birthday my parents called me from
Tahiti to wish me a happy fifth birthday
I pointed this out my dad tried to
convince me to had something to do with
the International Dateline with ice
cream did you get the sugar cone or the
seaweed cone well your parents are
definitely out there but no they were
involved they were around if I had to
choose I go with what you had what yeah
I mean I might skip the foreign-policy
birthday parties in the home schooling
and the hemp pants but schooling you
turned out fine but you know we're gonna
have a family someday and we're gonna
have to figure out what's best for our
kids
what exactly is best for our kids all
I'm saying is that there are good
schools and I'm sure we can find
something that you'd be comfortable with
and what if we can't well I'm sure we
can send them to one oh wait maybe like
two boarding school I went to boarding
school it's not the worst thing in the
world excuse me are you the person who
once said boarding school is the worst
thing in the world my point here is that
we should keep our options open
except for my option but I can't believe
you got us stuck in the snow
I wish the kids were in here without a
hell with them they're party poopers
little high-strung wonders what to do
one wonders one wonder I love the way
you're talking Oh Veneto funny no more
where is it
it's in the room where the wine is sorry
let me ask you a question all that free
love stuff in the 60s did it really go
on or was it all a lot of media hype
those are pretty wild time a lot of
parties a lot of make it bodies it's so
hard to remember the details
what are they doing here yeah Greg we
can't talk because this is officially
the Montgomery Finklestein weekend of
he'll love each other k*ll each other
tight each other up and paint each other
blue I don't care you were on your own
Greg and I are leaving
okay Dharma just just hit the gas gently
and let's see if we can get it rocking
okay stop stop stop stop stop are you
pushing not at the moment you know what
you need a break why don't you do this
in I'll push why not because if you
actually managed to push this out I
could never have sex with you again you
know the roads not that far away when
all this melts in a couple weeks we'll
be able to drive right on up there's a
grand guess this is a good time for me
to apologize for trying to get our
parents together and driving us off the
road and whatever else you got bring it
on okay guess I should give them a call
and let them know where we are
are you crazy did my come all right I'll
call triple-a tell them we're stuck on
the corner of snow and tree there's no
sign of them I don't know why you keep
checking not coming back maybe they were
afraid they might accidentally break
something and get yelled at are you
saying it is my fault that they left no
kitty he's not saying that because our
family doesn't indulge in the blame game
like you do how you can take the moral
high ground when you're I give nobody
tells me what
the children are right we're a bunch of
babies I'm surprised they didn't
hightail it out of here years ago are
you saying that we've acted unreasonably
we have and they have well certainly not
on a par I don't think there's a clear
winner but hang on to your ticket kitty
now the children love each other and it
looks like we're going to know each
other for the rest of our lives so let's
just figure out how to get along we've
been carrying stuff around for years
let's get it out in the open all right
I'll go first
fair you'll see what the hell is the
deal with that ponytail how'd you go to
the top of the hill to get a signal but
triple-a says they'll be here within a
couple of hours
I found their survival kit 8-track tapes
space food codex I think I can carbonate
the jerky for you I'm really sorry about
how my parents behave I think their
belief that no one can really own
property makes them bad houseguests oh
my parents aren't exactly the best hosts
they're difficult people to warm up to I
know I never have every moment of my
life was turned into some kind of
protest the theme
05x24 - The Mamas and the Papas Pt. 2
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Free-spirited Dharma, a yoga instructor and dog trainer, meets and falls for polar opposite Greg, a Harvard-educated U.S. attorney.
Free-spirited Dharma, a yoga instructor and dog trainer, meets and falls for polar opposite Greg, a Harvard-educated U.S. attorney.