03x06 - The Minstrel Boy

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Lilyhammer". Aired: 25 January 2012 – 17 December 2014.*
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Follows a former New York–based gangster named Frank "The Fixer" Tagliano trying to start a new life in isolated Lillehammer, Norway.
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03x06 - The Minstrel Boy

Post by bunniefuu »

- Could you please move?
- What?

I am about to make
a political statement here.

Do any of you have number...

...32?

What the hell?

Excuse me.

Jan?

Jan, is it really you?

- Let me help you.
- It's okay, Reidun.

- We should wipe that off.
- I should go.

Sit down.

I am so sorry, Jan.

I've thought about you so much.

I can't believe
what you have been through.

Yeah, it's been rough.

I never meant
to make life difficult for you.

The way I let you go...

Allah works in mysterious ways,
Reidun.

Tell me about it.
And now you're a Muslim, too.

Talk about having
a unique skill set in refugee issues.

I've got my head and ass full of skills,

but no one has any use for me.

You know what?

Why not come back to the office
and do some consulting work?

Are you offering me another chance
to work for Labor and Welfare, Reidun?

Indeed.

I have to make
an important phone call.

- Come by the office on Monday.
- Will do! See you on Monday.

I don't know.
I haven't seen him for a while.

Give me a break!

That's my seat.

Holy sh*t!

Look at this!

Torgeir would never treat Frode like this.

Torgeir?

Torgeir!

A blood clot is no big deal.
I had one myself back in 1999.

It's too soon to be certain.
We have to run some more tests.

Please don't move during the scan.

Lie perfectly still.

I love you.

What did you say, Doctor?

I said, I love you.

Thank you.

That's nice to hear.

It's me, stupid.

Sorry.

It's okay.

- It's good to have you back.
- It's good to be back.

- You shaved your beard.
- Yes.

I hope you're okay with the name plate.

- What?
- I heard you had changed your name.

That was something I did back in Iraq.
It's good to have my old name back.

Good.

Anyway, I'll see you at the seminar
this weekend.

- Seminar?
- Yes.

Didn't you get my e-mail?

I'm not totally on top of things yet,
IT-wise.

Anyway, you're more than welcome.

Did you know that the Iraqi language has


but not a single word for "seminar"?

- You're kidding, right?
- Yes.

- Okay. See you. Okay.
- See you later, Reidun.

See you later.

It's a deal.

Does that hurt?

Oh, thank you so much!

Good news.

The CT scan confirmed
you have a blood clot.

But it's dissolving as we speak,
so you can go home today.

You're the best doctor ever!

It was Henriksen's quick reaction
that saved you.

You didn't get this here.

Who gave this to you?

How often do you eat this kind of food?

- Two to three times a week.
- But otherwise, is your diet varied?

Sure. I eat kebabs and pizza, too.

Not anymore.

- You're kidding!
- Do you want to get to know your baby?

Yes, he does.

Excellent.

I can walk, you know.

Watch this.

I came as quickly as I could.

How are you doing?

Great... Totally awesome...

I'm just messing with you! I'm kidding!

- What?
- It was just a blood clot.

Christ. You f*cking idiots!

Do you have a fence?

Oh, yes, I'm sure you do
For everyone does


Something they wish to bar others from

Something they don't want everyone to see

But such barriers are not necessary

You can climb over almost any barrier

A fence cannot last forever, you know

It can never last forever

- Ane. From the Women's Center.
- Jan. Labor and Welfare.

- Thank you.
- For...?

- For that song!
- Oh, the song...

I get goose bumps just thinking about it.

That was just a bit of regurgitation
by an old troubadour.

Oh, no.

It was totally magical.

You have this ability
to merge together cultural expressions.

It's nice that something good can come
out of my multicultural background.

- You're multicultural?
- Oh, yes.

I'd love to hear more about that.

In my room.

Jan! Jan!

I hope you can control yourself.

What?

Oh.

We can't have any more episodes
with women.

I'm in full control of myself.
You have nothing to worry about.

That's my boy!

- Is there room for one more?
- I suppose.

I hope you understand that I can't accept
the offer you made at the bar.

Are you sure?

- Hi, Arne.
- Hi.

- Is Johnny here?
- No.

- Do you know where he is?
- No.

- Tell him I'm looking for him.
- Is everything okay?

- Sure. But it's important.
- Okay.

- Okay?
- Sure.

Two-thirty kroner.

I'll have another bottle and some peanuts.

Another bottle of champagne
for the farmers, please.

Cheers!

How did it go today?

He wasn't there.

Okay. Maybe I should talk to him.

It might be nice to mention that I'm not
wrestling with the same issues anymore.

That I'm doing therapy and stuff.

It's better if he hears it from me.

- You know how he can get.
- Okay.

- Hi. Are you looking for a baby carriage?
- Yes.

Then I strongly recommend this one.

- Do you want me to wrap it for you?
- Yes, please.

- Is everything okay?
- Sure.

- You were far away.
- Yeah.

I was just thinking about...

...names for our baby.

Really?

You are so amazing!

- Are we ready to get started?
- Yes.

Good.

Oh, God.

Wait here.

- Give me a break!
- You need to calm down.

Please behave, both of you.

Maybe we should try
some breathing exercises. Okay?

What are you doing?

I freaked out!

You come with me.

He is handsome.

So, Lars, when I am torn
between two cultures,

I think of this guy.

He is black and white and Asian.

And he's a completely normal guy,
just like you and me.

Hi, this is David Solli
from the Lillehammer Police.


I see.

What is this about?

I need a signature
on your new witness statement.


The report is being sent
to the DA tomorrow.


I understand. It sure will be great
to put this behind me.

I'll bet. There are still some holes
in the investigation.


But hopefully we'll be able to seal them

now that the perpetrator has woken up
from his coma.


Who is awake?

The patient is awake
and can breathe on his own.

But, unfortunately,
we are unable to communicate with him.

What a relief!

- A relief?
- What? No!

I'm relieved that you're honest.
Not knowing is the worst.

Visiting hours aren't over.
Do you want to talk to him?

Of course.

- Why wouldn't I want to do that?
- Right.

Hi, Dag.

It's good to see you.

I hope you can forgive me.

Everything became so damn complicated...

You're a good guy, Dag.

Truly, a great guy.

What the hell is this?

- Hello.
- Hi.

We're from the TV Licensing department.

We don't have a TV.

Okay.
Then what are we hearing in there?

The radio.

I'm afraid
you'll have to let us in for a peek.

How much do we owe?

What the f*ck?
What kind of license people are you?

We're the kind that gets pissed off

when people don't deliver the cocaine
as agreed.

You're a good man. It's good
for the patients to get out now and then.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

You have a nice visit at your friend's.

Hear that, Daggy?
We're going to go visit Uncle Jan.

No baby talk, please.

- What?
- We don't like that around here.

Of course not. I fully understand.

Okay, have a nice trip.

- How much are we talking?
- Three million.

Christ!

One next week, two the week after.

But I don't have that kind of money.
What happens if I don't...?

No, no, no!

See you next week.

Who could that be?

Is it really you?
What a pleasant surprise!

Oh, my God. Who the hell is that?

Just some brain-damaged guy I help out.
Nothing registers with him.

No, this doesn't feel right.

Really? Let me just...

There!

Problem solved.

Isn't this going a little too far?

Oh, my God!

Yes!

f*cking sheep k*ller. Good riddance.

- Do you know who his mystery date is?
- I have no idea.

I don't know if...

- What?
- Did you check out her ass?

Yeah. Didn't you?

- Of course, but...
- It's wrong if I do it?

It's just weird to date someone
who swings both ways.

Everyone is bisexual.
I'm sure you've been turned on by men.

Don't even go there.
This is a stupid conversation.

Everything is set, Torgeir.

I just need your signature.

Just sign here, and we'll take care
of the transfer to your business partners.
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