07x03 - The Swift Family

[bunniefuu]

Tonight on "supernanny"...hey! Come on!

A nanny rats out her employers...[Crying]

I felt like it was really necessary

For the children's safety.[Grunts]

And jo is called in to help.

The kids run wild...aah!

And all mom and dad do is nag the nanny.

So she should be equipped to deal with your children,

Even though you're not.right.

Grandma tries to help...this is what she had in her mouth.

But mom and dad are ungrateful.

There's only so much you can say.

If you go too far, it's not okay.

You say to yourself, well, how did we get here?

Because you were lazy. Because it wasn't important enough.

Will the neglect continue?there's stuff all over the floor over there.

No. She's fine.can jo get through to these parents...

In a nutshell, you don't know what you're doing.

Or is disaster about to strike?

[Horn blares]

♪♪♪

Captioned by closed captioning services, inc.

I'm in sacramento, california,

And a fellow nanny has reached out to me,

Because her family need my help.

Strange, right? Let's take a look.

Hi. My name's kadie. I'm years old,

And I am the nanny for the swift family.

[Grunts]joshua, what's going on?

[Singsongy] nothing.hey! Come on!

No! I cannot "come on"!

My name's tony.and I'm jenny.

And we have five kids--

Jack, who's , joshua, who's ,

Sean, who's .[Jenny] then we have max, who's ,

And baby mia, who's months.

Gloria's my mom.

She is extremely involved

With our family on a daily basis.

Max?[Kadie] I gave "supernanny" a call, because I felt like

It was really necessary for the children's safety.

I'm worried about them getting hit by cars.

I'm worried about them getting kidnapped.

This little boy shouldn't be out in the street.

I mean, where are his parents?

It's definitely a concern of mine

That the children are gonna get hurt,

Especially the little -month-old.

This is just too dangerous.

Oh! Jeez![Jenny] what?

Oh, dear.you didn't tell me she was behind me.

Well, I didn't know.[Jo] nobody's aware of her crawling around on the floor.

Hold on a minute.

That's not safe at all.

[Gloria] how did she get this in her mouth?

She... Puts it in her mouth.

Gloria is definitely more of a parent than jenny and tony.

We're not gonna play with the food.

Really?

You're gonna have to put the baby somewhere, jen.[Jenny] no, she's fine.

She takes care of the kids a lot.

There's stuff all over the floor over there.

No. She's fine.[Jack] well, do you want to put her over here?

Just let her--no. Don't put her in there.

She needs to crawl around a little bit. [Coos]

No. This is what she had in her mouth.

That's crazy. What are these parents thinking?

[Jenny] I want all these cups picked up. Hey!

Ow!stop crawling on the furniture!

We're at our wits' end.

We're exhausted.get in the pool.

Ow!hey! Don't do that.

Supernanny, I'm begging you to please help the swift family.

Lay down. Now.

Guys, you're falling apart at the seams,

But I'm on my way.

[Doorbell rings][singsongy] hello.

[Jo] hello. Hi.[Normal voice] pleased to meet you. I'm jenny.

Pleased to meet you.when jo first came in the house, I have to admit

That I was intimidated.hi, sean. Pleased to meet you.

Pleased to meet you, too.pleasure to meet you. I'm josh.

Hi, jack. Pleasure to meet you.pleasure to meet you, too.

Nice to meet you.hi, tony.

[Jo] who's the one hiding behind the blanket? [Laughs][laughs]

[Jack] that's max. That's max.hello.

And this is mia.hello.

Just after I arrived, I got this whole conversation

About how they're not really happy with their nanny.

I mean, really?i call her more of a babysitter.

I wouldn't call her as a substitution for a parent.

You know what I'm saying?she's not always here on a regular basis.

When she comes, it's just like, okay, whatever.

She more watches the kids when we're gone.

The problems that she faces every day

Looking after these kids-- do you not face them yourself?

I do, but I feel like it's m--

It's okay for me to face those problems,

But it's not okay for her.but you feel-- so she should be equipped

To deal with your children, even though you're not.

Right. Exactly. In a perfect world.

[Jo] I think this woman's extremely lazy.

She's hired a nanny. She has grandma.

And yet she's saying, I think my nanny should be able

To take care of my kids completely, even if I can't.

Really?

Hi.and as if on cue,

Kadie the nanny walked straight through the door.

Hi, jo.jo. How are you?

I'm good. How are you?and then almost immediately, dad left...

All right. No, no. It's raining. Stay in.

Then mom left, and I was left with the nanny and the kids.okay. You're good.

When it was time for kadie to change mia's diaper...

[Grunts][laughs]

[Jo] sean and max saw the opportunity to misbehave...

[Sean and max screaming]

Oh, my gosh. What is going on out there?

And the roughhousing continued into mom and dad's bedroom.

[Cries][grunts and laughs]

Aah!

Uh-oh. Your diaper's all messed up in there.dun-da-da! Aah!

Ow! [Laughs and coughs]

Finally, kadie realized where the boys were.

Hey.[Mia fusses]

[Gasps] sean. Sean.

[Crying]

That's it. No.i know. No. We were just going like this.

Hey, guys.i don't think that mom wants you

To be playing in her room, so you need to go ask her.[Jo] kadie's totally unsure

Of how she should be managing these boys,

And I soon found out why.

Would you say that you're both on the same page?no. I don't think so.

All right.jenny and tony have never sat me down and given me a game plan

To disciplining their children.

I've really gone on by observing them

And trying to simulate what they would do.

There aren't really clear rules,

And it kinda changes...

Mom, I want a piece.between us, between parents...

Between if my mom's here or if I'm here.

I want a piece. I want a piece.

[Jo] well, that's a surefire recipe for disaster.

Everybody needs to be in sync.

Mom needed to pick some things up at the grocery store,

And so I said to her, "let's go with all the kids,"

Just to get them all out together.

Hey! Excuse me. No.meatballs!

That's so weird.[Jenny] okay. Max, come here, please.

Sean, come here.i will!

[Jenny] I was panicking, because I knew

The kids' first inclination was gonna be to run away...

Sean! Come here.

[Jenny] and I was trying really hard

To keep things under control,

But I could feel things slipping away.

We're gonna go to the restroom, right? You have to go?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, I have to go.

Okay.i have to go by myself.

You can't go by yourself. I have to go with you.come then!

Mm. Can you stand right by and watch her?uh-huh. Yeah.

Just don't take her out.okay.

[Mia coos]are you being serious?

Well, I'm gonna--a-are you being serious?

Yes. Totally.but that's--that's--

This is what I would do.that's--no way.

That's crazy.

[Jo] she was about to leave her -year-old

In charge of the baby.

I don't have enough hands.you think it's because you don't have enough hands?

Yeah.

Done.okay.

You don't need more than one pair of hands to realize

That you take your baby with you to keep them safe,

And I don't think that's a priority for mom

At the moment.[Jenny] I was really happy when we got out

Of that grocery store, and to tell you the truth,

I probably made it through half the things

That I was planning on getting.

Coming up on...

Mom has a heartbreaking confession...

You know, when I go to bed at night, I feel sad,

Because I don't want them to grow up like this.and jo doesn't mince words.

I think you all act immature, to be honest with you.

When "supernanny" returns.

♪♪♪

[Jo] after watching mom in the supermarket,

I'm concerned about her actions,

So I pulled her aside to talk to her.

Do you feel overwhelmed right now with all the kids?

It feels overwhelming.yeah.

It feels like work % of the time.

It's not fun. I'm not having fun.

I don't think my mom has fun.

I don't think my husband has fun.

I think we're all just trying to get through the day

The best that we can,

And that's just not what I envisioned.

You know, when I go to bed at night, I feel sad,

Because I'm like, this isn't--

I don't want them to grow up like this.

I don't want them to grow up sad or thinking, like, you know,

I grew up, and it was just-- I mean--'cause that's what I see.

Yeah.i see you--i see you hurt.

Yeah.[Jo] it's very obvious to me

That this mom's not enjoying parenthood,

Because she's not engaging with any of her children

And having fun,

And if she's gonna change that, it's gonna take effort.

Later on in the day, one of mom and dad's key helpers,

Grandma, came 'round for dinner.

Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm jo frost.how are you? I'm gloria.

Hi, gloria. Pleasure to meet you.

Do you want to put her in her chair?[Jenny] yeah.

Okay. I will do that.and gloria went straight into minding those kids.

Here. Eat this.

[Spoon clatters]max.

Turn around and sit down.

Finally, somebody around here was taking control.

Sean, come here. I need you to do something.

I'll hold that. Go to mia's bedroom

And get me, uh, a w-- uh, those wipes. Fast.

[Jo] there are little things that go on

That grandma sees and observes, and she's shaping and molding

Their behavior and etiquette every day,

And yet it's going to the sidelines

When it comes to jen and tony doing that.

Look out.

That pool-- does it have a fence? No.

I know. Does it have an alarm?disconnected.

What, the pool alarm is disconnected?mm-hmm.

[Jo] these kids are riding their bikes

Very close to the pool edge, no helmets on,

And there's no pool alarm on.

I mean, it's a dangerous situation.

With the baby, we have to be very careful with this door,

Because she's now crawling out...

Mm-hmm.

And has gotten out, you know, some distance.

Mm. So safety's an issue here.

Big issue. Big. Major issue.

You know, there's only so much you can say.

If you go too far, it's not okay.

Why? What happens?

With these two, it's, "oh, it's okay."

My judgment is, it's not okay.

These kids need to be safe,

And they need to be protected by their parents.

You need to go get your jacket and come in,

Because it's too cold out here.

I'd seen enough, quite frankly. It was time for me to leave.

So what I'd like to do is call for a family meeting tomorrow,

So that we can sit down and really work out

Where we're gonna go from here, okay?[Jenny] perfect.

I need to have a serious conversation

With these parents tomorrow, because what I've seen,

I'm not happy with.

♪♪♪

[Jenny] I was very nervous about hearing

What jo would have to say.

I started to realize, man, I'm--

There's a lot of things here I'm doing wrong.

It's not just one or two things. It's everything.

There are four adults around your children,

But you guys are not on the same page,

And it really sends a bad message to the kids,

And that's why you're in this pickle now.mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

[Tony] for sure.so it's gonna be really important

That you guys talk about raising your family

With grandma, as she is a key co-carer in your lives.

She has her own view and her own ways

In which she feels that the kids should be raised,

And instead of maturely communicating...

I think we both get defensive.

Yeah.i don't buy it. Oh, guess who's getting fed up

With hearing gloria put things right?

You guys--but only because you won't step up yourselves.

I think you act immature, to be honest with you.

Mm-hmm.it's a conversation.

You say to yourself, "well, how did we get here?"

Because you were lazy. Because it wasn't important enough.

Because sitting down and working out what was right for your kids

Just wasn't important enough.

Which leads me to talk about yourself, jen...

Yeah.and your connection with the kids.

Okay. I think that if I had more free time

Here at the house--

But I have to do the laundry or whatever.

You've got help.

You've got help coming out your ears.

I think it's immature and lazy

To rely on your mom to take over,

And then you're bringing the nanny in

And you're saying, right, now you do that.

You have to jump in to your kids' world,

Otherwise you're not gonna know 'em.

Look. You put it into yourselves.

You have date night. You go out,

And you recognize the importance to feed that relationship.

It's the same with the kids.

Safety.mm-hmm.

Mnh. Big issues.

Doors being opened.

Kids just drop things on floors.

So why is it not necessary for you to follow through

With your kids,

When it comes to them picking up after themselves,

When actually those pieces could choke mia and k*ll her?

No pool alarm being rigged. It's off right now.mm-hmm.

Do you need the broken leg?

No.do you need the drowning?

No.

That's just blurbing out hot air and saying, "it's important,"

But your actions--

Well, there are no actions.

So we've got a lot of work to do.

We need to leave the egos and the laziness

At the front door, need % commitment.

You guys are either in or you're out.we're ready.

I'm excited.so I'll see you soon. [Mouths words]

Okay. Thank you.okay. Thanks.

Coming up on...

I don't feel that she takes the basketball

As much as a priority as the swimming.

I was at every game except one.

Mom and dad push grandma's buttons...

I took that as a complete affront.

And...i am putting you on a time out.

[Crying]max won't be disciplined without a fight.

When "supernanny" returns.

♪♪♪

[Jo] I do need a roundtable summit

With gloria, jen and tony,

Because no one's on the same page.

So we're gonna hash it out, have this conversation

And start putting in a game plan.you are the parents.

You have the fortune of having

Your mother-in-law/mother support you,

So I think what would be very important

At this first stage would be for you both to discuss

What you feel needs to be resolved,

So that gloria can hear that and support that.

One thing that I see with my mom is, um,

I'll either undermine what she says or vice versa.

[Jo] uh-huh.i may have said, today you don't have to do... Whatever,

And then I'll--they'll come home and they'll say,

"Well, you said to me earlier I didn't have to do something,

"But now grandma just sat in the car

And told me ididhave to."That happens a lot.

It's very frustrating as a parent

To, you know, get undermined.

You feel helpless.

They have to be the ones that set the agenda.[Jo] mm-hmm.

I facilitate it.

Grandma was saying the same thing as nanny kadie.

There are no rules in the house,

And they need to come from the parents,

Not the grandma and not the nanny.

[Tony] gloria takes the kids to swimming,

And she has for a long time.

A big thing for me is, I would like gloria to respect

The other sports that they do just as much as swimming.

And that's a big thing that has upset me

The last month and a half, because they have been playing--

One of 'em's been playing basketball,

And I don't feel that she takes the basketball

As much as a priority as the swimming.

I took that as a complete affront.

[Gloria] I was at every game except one,

And I was there with all the parents.

I don't know exactly what you're honing in on here.

Well, I mean, i-i don't want to go over example after example...[Gloria] well, no. I know...

[Jo] these parents have grandma come in

And take care of the kids,

And yet they complain

That gloria focuses on swimming and not enough on basketball.

Like, really?

It's really clear that there's a lot of resentment.

There's a lot of anger.

There's a lot of harbored feelings here

Between the three of you.

It's really sad, actually.

[Jo] to really iron out

These issues that the adults were having,

It was important that they come together on the same page

With regards to the kids.

The first thing that we needed to do was to get mom and dad

To establish and create some house rules,

So that all the adults in the house could stick with them.

Fighting.fighting.

Fighting.okay. How about ask when they leave?

Yeah.[Jo] after we'd established the rules,

I brought in nanny kadie,

So that mom and dad could start to delegate

Who was going to take care of what tasks with what child.

In this circumstance,

What you will do is divide the labor. All right?

And conquer.correct. Correct.

In the household, there's chaos going on at all times,

But this board--it's a way of organizing the four of us

So that we are all on the same page.

[Jo] each circle represents one day of the week,

And so I've got mom busy filling in the first.

[Jo] someone's got to feed the baby, right?right.

And what--who's that?i was able to delegate the tasks to my mom

And a little bit to kadie, and I realized immediately,

This is gonna be a great tool.we gotta bathe the kids.

[Jo] mom successfully distributed the work

In the first circle,

And tomorrow she'll get busy on the second.

So what I'm gonna ask you to do

Is stick that up in what I call the tv room,

So then everyone can have a look at that.

I think that having the board there and going to it every day

And writing down what we expect--

I think it's gonna be a great thing.

The next thing to do was really to get this house safe for mia,

So I took the family shopping to get some babyproof items.

However, little max wasn't in the mood to go shopping.

Max, you hold on to the cart. He's not holding on to the cart.

Max, you need to come and hold on to the cart. Thank you.

Max started in with his usual behavior.

Max, where are you going?

Really? I'm gonna hand that over to you, mom.

I'm gonna give you a warning.

Do not take your hand off the cart.

Look at me when I'm talking to you. Do you understand?[Mia fusses]

He wasn't listening. He wasn't following directions.

Actually, does he deserve it?

[Jenny] oh. He's gone again. Do I tell him

He's gonna have a time out? Like, I just warned him.yeah. Yeah.

Mom, put your phone in.max, I need to talk to you.

Because you let go of the cart after I told you not to,

When we get home, you're going to have a time out.

[Whining] no, no, no. No!

Max, stop right now.

[Jenny] you're not gonna get a gumball today,

'Cause you didn't listen to mommy.

[Crying] aah! I wanna get a gumball.okay?

Max kicked off. He was screaming at the top of his lungs...

I wanna get a gumball!

And mom and dad were beside themselves with embarrassment

Of how to deal with the situation.i want a gumball!

If we would've given him the gumball,

Then that would let him know it's okay that he--

Hecanlet go of the cart and not follow directions.come back to the cart.

I want a gumball!now then--stop, stop, stop, stop, stop for a minute.

Right now I want you to hold on to that cart

And stop messing around. Right now. That's enough.

[Crying][jo] jen and tony found what they were looking for,

But they still needed to follow through

With discipline when they got home.no!

When we all arrived back at the house,

It was time to put max straight on time out.

I am putting you on a time out,

Because you kept letting go of the basket

And you did not listen to me.[Crying] no, no, no.

And I need you to stay here for four minutes.no!

Got a timer? Did you set the timer?[Crying]

[Jo] we saw jen implement a time out with max...

[Max] no!and he tested her on that as well.

[Crying]

[Jenny] it got really ugly for a while,

But having jo there allowed me

To carry through and not give in.

[Crying]

[Water running]

[Jo] but eventually, through jen's perseverance,

He did stay in the time out,

And we did get

The first discipline ever ex*cuted.

Max.

Mommy put you on a time out, 'cause you did not hold on

To the cart like I asked you to.

When jenny was doing the time out with max, I thought

She did a great job. Um, she really stuck to her g*ns.

Sorry.

Okay. Can I have a hug?

[Jenny] I felt really good at the end of the time out,

Because that's probably one of the first times

Tony or myself have really stuck with a punishment.

I love you.

With max's discipline followed through,

We got busy with babyproofing the house

With the items that we bought from the shop.you wanna do some of those?

Yeah.i wanna do some of those!

[Tony] okay. Hold--you can do some of these, too.

[Jo] sean and max helped out by covering up the outlets...

You got it?yeah.

Nice.[Jo] whilst dad put casings around power strips...

Ah. I got it. Beautiful.

Bumpers on the corners of end tables,

Covers over electrical cords

And a guard on mia's bedroom door

To keep those little fingers safe.

I'd made it very clear to mom and dad in the family meeting

That small items on the floor

Would seriously be a choking hazard for mia,

And now I wanted to make that point very clear to the boys.

We all know that those little things

That go in baby's mouths can choke and be very dangerous.

[Jo] and then I had the boys put the small toys

Into babyproof containers.

I think we feel a lot safer now

Having mia crawling around on the floor.

[Jo] and then there was pool safety.

I had mom and dad switch the pool alarm back on,

And then I gave them a nice little visual

To remind the boys to keep the sliding doors closed

For mia's sake.

This is the difference between mia crawling out there

And you guys remembering to close the door.

The butterfly is separated. Look. Two halves.

So you want to bring it together, okay?

[Jenny] the kids immediately responded.

They were excited about it,

And it's just so easy to see

That the wings need to be together.

Max, come on when you're done.

You always have to remember-- close the butterfly.

[Jo] there's no doubt

That this house will be a much safer environment

For mia and the boys going forward.

Coming up on...

Mom has it out with grandma...

I've been very concerned about safety and the kids.

So we're not doing a good enough job.

When "supernanny" returns.

♪♪♪

[Jo] with household safety on the go,

It's gonna be important to work on relationships,

And jen and gloria have a lot of strain in their relationship,

And we need to get to the bottom of this.

Let's have a conversation about what creates

This friction between the pair of you.

You just want me to say whatever?

Hey, just go for it, the pair of you.

I feel that I don't live up to your expectations,

That I don't do a good enough job,

So I think that's left me in a situation

Where I feel resentment.

I've always been in your corner.

I've always thought of you as...

Absolutely wonderful.

[Gloria] over the years, I've heard my daughter say

That I am disappointed in her,

And I've gone to the point of saying,

"Well, I think you're disappointed in yourself."

Gloria, what do you feel you need to do

With regards to assessing yourself?

I need to, maybe, take some steps back here.

Um, I've been very concerned about safety and the kids.

They need to come more to the forefront with you and tony.

They need to be thought of first.

So we're not doing a good enough job.

Well, let's be honest. I mean, that's why I'm here.

When there are things that are not being taken care of,

Which are all the things that I've been helping

You guys to understand...yes.

Safety, discipline for unruly behavior...mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

And parents are not taking care of that...mm-hmm.

Then you're like, well, what's going on here?

What are these parents doing?mm-hmm.

But you are recognizing that you need to back off now

In knowing what's been put in place.yeah.

What do you need to do with regards to working on yourself?

To be more assertive. I need to make sure

That our rules are set by tony and myself

And that we uphold them

And that you're there to help with them and support them,

So that when you're here, it's enjoyable and fun,

And there's not so much pressure to be a third parent.what do you want--

I-i want a better relationship with you. I really do.why do you want it, gloria?

Because you're my daughter, and I love you dearly.

I love you, jen.i love you, too. [Laughs]

Don't laugh. Goof.well, I can't help it. [Laughs]

You make me cry.it's been a really long time since I've said to my mom,

You know, "I love you" and given her a hug.

[Gloria] what this conversation did

Was to open a door,

And that was a beginning.

[Jo] mom mentioned to me that she doesn't find parenting fun,

But she's done nothing

To work on her relationships with her kids.

It would be a real good start for you...mm-hmm.

To actually just get involved doing some things with them

That they enjoy doing.okay.

So I thought what we'd do is-- is start off with josh.

Maybe we'll play h-o-r-s-e or whatever.yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jenny] you're gonna go easy on me, right?

All right. Who's yellow and who's green?

We're gonna play h-o-r-s-e.oh, I'm yellow.

How was, uh, practice last night?good.

[Jo] so I like this. Mom gets a chance

To really hang out with josh and do what he loves doing,

But it also gives 'em a chance

Just to have an everyday conversation...

Has he, uh, started football yet?

[Jo] so that she understands more about josh

As he's growing up.

We talked about how school was going

And how I've been doing in my basketball games.

Dad, she's on fire.

[Laughs]

And then it was jack's turn.

He's very creative, so I brought some clay out

To get his imagination fired up.

What should we make? I think we should have a plan.

You're the architect, huh?[Sean] what are you gonna do with me?

Let's just go free, do what we ever want to do.no direction, huh?

No direction whatsoever.[Jenny] the great thing about spending the alone time

With the boys is that it's starting to open up

The lines of communication between us.

I-i like your cartoon character.

And you did 'em the three different ways--

Normal, old and buff.

[Laughs]

What I realized is that it's been a long time

Since I've played with them and really had the opportunity

To talk about things that are important to them.

That's cool. Make clouds for it to sit on now.

Good idea.

I hope to spend one-on-one time with my mom more often.

It's fun.

Sean had broke a house rule, so he was being punished,

Which meant that it became max's turn with mom,

And I had a little project for the pair of them.

Max was going to learn how to ride his bike

Without his training wheels, and mom was going to teach him.get your feet up there.

[Giggling]okay, now we're gonna go straight.

Let go of the handlebars. You're just gonna hold the seat.

You go. You go. You go. Push. Pedal. Pedal. Pedal. Okay.

You know, jen's got him going really fast,

And if she just keeps doing it with him, very, very quickly

He's gonna end up being able to ride this bike by himself.

Go![Giggling]

Well done.do it again?

Yeah, you want to do it again now,

'Cause you rode your bike by yourself.

Here we go. Are you ready? Go! Faster!

Pedal. Faster, faster, faster...

[Jenny] although I have four boys,

I don't think I've ever taught one of 'em, by myself anyway,

To ride their bike.

It meant the world to me to be able to teach him that skill,

And I know I'll never forget it,

And I don't think he'll ever forget it, either.

[High-pitched voice] riding your bike by yourself!

[Giggling]mom's beginning to realize that through doing these activities

With her boys, it's just growing their relationship

More and more, so that she can continue to bond.

I know how to ride my bike now.

♪♪♪

Let's discuss what you guys are all going to do whilst I'm gone.

The "labor of love" is going to be very important

For the three of you,

Because it's going to keep the relationships healthy.

Sean, hopefully, will get to have that time with you.yeah.

[Gloria] I'm nervous for jo to leave.

I'm not gonna have her there to ask her questions,

And I'm gonna have to just figure it out on my own.please work hard and enjoy...

All right.and I'll see you in several days, okay?

[Gloria] all right.[Jo] this family really has had to absorb a lot

Since I've been there,

But, you know, I am gonna expect them to step up.

If they want change, they're gonna have to work for it.

Coming up on...

Jo doesn't like what she sees...

In a nutshell, you don't know what you're doing.

And later, grandma gets her revenge...

[Gloria] all right, tony. You're gonna get it.

Oh! [Laughs]

When "supernanny" returns.

And now...

How do you get a child to behave

When shopping in a supermarket or any other store?

"A"--prepare your child before you enter the store.

"B"--let them choose a few items when you're in the store.

"C"--tell them they're allowed to choose anything.

It will keep them quiet.

Find out the answer when we return.

And now...

How do you get a child to behave

When shopping in a supermarket or any other store?

"A"--prepare your child before you enter the store.

"B"--let them choose a few items when you're in the store.

"C"--tell them they're allowed to choose anything.

It will keep them quiet.

The answer is "a"--

Prepare your child before you enter the store.

Expectations should be clear.

Engage your child in the process by having them look for items

On the shopping list, as this will keep them busy

And get your errands done faster.

♪♪♪

[Jo] I've been gone for three days,

And I am curious to see exactly how this family have got on

Whilst I've been away.

I don't want to have any mistakes on the dvd session.

I want to get %. I want an "a"-plus.

Hello.hello.

I don't really think jo's gonna have a big problem

With anything I did personally.

Now tony is another story.who's ready to take a look?

We're ready.we're ready.

Do you want to help get max and sean dressed?

Yeah. You're not dressed yet.

Can you get dressed, please?

Kadie's coming over tonight

Because, uh, dad and I are going to dinner,

If you don't listen to kadie

Or you don't follow our rules...i will.

You're going to have a time out.i will.

You will be missing outside time tomorrow.why--

Jack, you will lose game time tomorrow.i figured.

Hi.come over here. Let me show you this.

Your concern is movie and bed.

Consequences--you're gonna give 'em that warning,

And then if it happens again, then it's a consequence.

Okay.

[Chuckles]

Feel good watching that?

Yeah. For probably the first time, I went over with kadie

Specifically what my expectations were.

Just your overall confidence

In communication

Was absolutely superb.

I mean, everybody had clarity.

Mm-hmm.everybody knew where they were at.

Right.and even the kids and how they responded

Was absolutely fantastic.

It was very wonderful to see.great.

♪♪♪

We're not--watch for mia. Mind-- be mindful of your sister,

Who's right underneath you. Jump.

Sean! Butterfly. Thank you.

What we are seeing is a complete turnaround

From what we had in the beginning

And a safety-- little sanctuary for mia

To, uh, no doubt, be walking very soon. [Chuckles]

Yeah. Mm.mm-hmm.

You've done both well. You really have. Good to see.

Sean, you and I are gonna watercolor.

Did you know

That your grandfather, my dad, was an artist?

Grandpa jack?

Mm-hmm. He'd watercolor all the time.

So do you think you're gonna be ready for second grade?mm-hmm.

Well, I thought first grade was gonna be, like, a push up...yeah.

But it wasn't that hard.it wasn't as hard as you thought?

Yeah.

[Pants] what a great day for a bike ride.

In order for me to let you go, you have to give me a kiss.[Giggling] mwah.

[Gasps] aw. And let me tickle you.

No. [Laughs][high-pitched voice] tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle.

So lovely to see. [Laughs]that kiss was a big thing.

Yeah. He doesn't give kisses very much.

He doesn't give those out very easily.

Mm. What I get from that as well is you enjoying motherhood.

You enjoying now your parenting.

That's the biggest deal here,

Because the children feel that,

And that allows you to have more emotional intimacy with them,

Which is all part of your bonding

And your experiences together...

Mm-hmm.which was so necessary.

Mm-hmm.okay, so, tony, we're gonna move on to yourself.

[Jenny] you have allergies, kiddo.

[Tony] yeah. He's got 'em, 'cause I have 'em.

Just teaspoon.okay.

That's all he needs.no. No. I don't want it!

Max, get up here now. Quickly!

[Whines] no. It tastes bad!here. I'll--go like this, and you don't taste it.

I don't want to.okay, I'm gonna have to hold you down

And force you to take it unless you do it right now.no. No.

I'm gonna count to three, and I'm gonna pin you down...no, no, no, no, no.

And I'm gonna make you take-- I'm getting upset now.

I'm starting to get frustrated with you.no, no, no, no.

Okay. If you don't take your medicine,

I'm gonna put you on a time out. Okay?but i...

Do you understand? That's your warning.

No. Don't--no, that's the one--

Look at me. That is your warning.no.

Look in my eyes.ew. [Whines]

One... Two... Three.

In a nutshell, you don't know what you're doing,

And because you didn't know what you were doing,

You sabotaged a situation with max.

What you're looking at there-- was it necessary?

I thought so at the time.

"Take this now! Otherwise I'm gonna pin you down,

And you'll have no choice, and then you'll do th--"[chuckles]

Do you understand what I mean?yeah.

Like, you did nothing to be able to make him feel

That taking the medicine would be good for him.

He took it after I gave him the warning about the time out.

Yeah, 'cause he didn't want to sit on a time out.

The time out is not to control, though. The time out is

To teach them boundaries. It's to teach them rules.

It's not right to use a time out to control that situation.

Well, so what do you do, though?

Because I've told him before what taking medicine--

That, you know--change your own attitude.

I mean, there's a lack of tolerance here, big-time.

There's a lack of patience, so you have to change

Your whole demeanor and the way that you behave,

And then you'll get a better response from the children.

I've seen some great material here from mom.

However, if you're not on board, you'll sabotage everything.

Ready?ready.

All right. Let's go. Thank you.thank you.

Coming up on...

It's dad's last chance.

Can he make the medicine go down?

Look at dad.

And finally, gratitude for grandma.

"Glo, we both love you very much

And can't thank you enough for all your love and support."

When "supernanny" returns.

♪♪♪

[Jo] I saw on the dvd that dad was giving max his medicine

In a very forceful way.

I need to teach dad how to have a better approach.

[Whining]max, you know you're taking your medicine

For your eye, right? For your allergies? Right?

Look at dad. Those are for afterwards. That's right.

I know. I know that those aren't disgusting.yeah.

But we have to take this, because--

But it's--i can't--uh, you're having a conversation

With yourself. He's not even spoke, and you're like,

"I know that you're thinking this, and yeah--"

You're having a conversation with yourself.

Have a conversation with max.

Maxey, you have to take this medicine, babe.

Because it doesn't taste good?

I know. But we have to take it so you'll feel better,

So your eye will stop itching,

And we can take the seltzer water right afterwards.

Look. It's right there ready to go.

And do you have a little syringe that you can put it in,

That he can apply it himself?

Yeah, we do have one of those.

Why don't you do it yourself? Do you want to use the spoon,

Or do you want to use the squeezer?

You want to use the squeezer?okay. You do it.

[Jenny] it was just being more empathetic

About how he was feeling and how frightened he was...[Tony] all the way down.

And once we empowered him,

You saw a different result, a different kid.

[Tony] you got it. Good job.

[Jenny] good job, max. Yay!you're all done.

[Tony] I just need to exercise my patience with max,

Especially when it comes to getting him involved

And letting him do things on his own.what did we do?

Just let him do it himself.mm-hmm. We gave him the choice.

[Jo] I think dad's certainly learnt more patience.

I think he's recognizing when and when not to give discipline,

And I think he's feeling more confident in himself,

Which means he's making progress.

I think mom's done a really fantastic job

Building those relationships with her sons

Through one-on-one time.

I do have another little idea that I want to show her,

To bring the whole family together.

All right. Let's go. Follow me.

We've got a surprise place to go to.

So off we went to the trampolining center,

But before we went bouncing,

I had a little gift I wanted to give the family.as you can see,

This is the "swift family fun" photo album.

So with this instant camera, we get to take photos

And actually put 'em into your photo album,

Which is rather cool.[Jenny] right away.

And who's ready to have some fun?[Children cheer]

Yeah? All right! Okay.oh, my god.

[Jo] this way. This way.

Whoo-hoo!

Oh! Hey, no.

Whoo-hoo!

[Grunts][jenny] oh, my god.

We really enjoyed playing dodgeball

And just jumping as a family.[Gloria] jack, come get this one.

Aah! [Laughs][tony] I think the kids loved having jenny on the trampoline.

I think we've been to that trampoline center

Probably times.

She's never one time gone on the trampolines.

I think they'll always remember that.i have the worst aim!

[Josh] my mom usually doesn't play with us.

It was very nice spending time with my mom.oh! [Laughs]

[Laughs][gloria] it was amazing. Everybody was playing.

The kids were having a great time.

[Gloria] all right, tony. You're gonna get it.

[Whoosh]oh! [Laughs]

[Whooshes]

Glo definitely has an arm. I mean, she is very athletic.

[Whoosh]

There's one right in the back!

♪♪♪

Whoa! I got it.

Before we left, mom and grandma started putting photos

Into the album.oh, that's a nice one.

Mm-hmm.i feel like the photo album is something

That we can continue to create as a family.

What I've learned from jo

Is that the activity doesn't matter.

What's important is that you're together,

Able to play together and really enjoy one another's company.

I'm becoming more confident

And feeling more fulfilled and happy in my day.

[Jo] before I arrived, mom didn't even enjoy motherhood

And didn't know how to connect with her older boys.

Now she does, and she's enjoying it,

And that's really what it's all about.

♪♪♪

[Jo] gloria's done a lot for this family,

And I don't truly believe it's been appreciated,

So before I leave, I want to change that.

I noticed that grandma does a lot of things with you guys,

And sometimes it's really nice

To let the person know who does that

That we appreciate the things that they do for us.

[Jo] I thought it'd be a great idea

If the boys drew some pictures

And for jen and tony to write a thoughtful letter,

And so I brought grandma into her "grandma presentation."I'm sitting down.

[Laughs]

Oh, my goodness.

Wow.

Very nice.

Let me see. [Gasps] max!

It was absolutely wonderful.

Each of the little boys with their picture

And their-- with their story behind it.

[Max] where'd you get these? [Giggles]

Oh, my goodness.[Gloria] it was just marvelous.

Thank you very much. You're a great guy.

[Jo] and then it was time for dad to read the letter

From himself and jen to gloria.

"Glo, it is very hard to put into words

"How much jenny and I appreciate all you do for our family.

"The kids love you so much, and now with all of us

"On the same page, I think we will all start having

"A lot more fun with the kids and each other.

"We both love you very much and can't thank you enough

For all your love and support. Love, tony and jenny."

[Chuckles] very nice.

[Laughs] very nice. Thank you.

[Tony] you're welcome.

[Gloria] the letter was probably one of the best things

That had happened in a long time.

It was very gratifying.

[Chuckles]

[Jo] boys! It's time for me to leave.

[Jack] really?bye, jo jo.

Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Tony, take care of yourself.thank you for everything.

You're welcome.[Tony] jo, thank you so much. I now know what I need to do.

We have a plan to do it,

And we have the tools to carry it out.

Jen.thank you. Thanks for everything.

You're more than welcome.

I hope that you've realized that you are capable

Of much more than what you thought you were capable of.

I agree.[Jenny] jo, I cannot thank you enough

For coming into our family.

This has been an invaluable experience

That I will never forget.thank you, nanny jo.

Bye, jo.thank you very much, jo jo. [Giggles]

[Jo] now we have jen and tony in charge, and I really do believe

That it's brought them together closer as a family,

And they're actually enjoying their family,

And that is what's important.