01x08 - Prisoners of Love

[bunniefuu]

Dad?

Can I ask you a question?

About the specter speeder?

Sure!

[Grunts]

This little baby has state-of-the-art

Spirit plane exploration technology.

And it's got a super-sized cup holder.

Jack, dear...

It's getting awfully late.

Is there something that you might have forgotten today?

Uh...

Something significant...

Having to do with today's date

Of may ninth.

Ninth, ninth, ninth.

Ninth!

Ninth? Nope.

Still not catching your drift.

Our anniversary, dear?

Oh, well, I guess it just slipped your mind--

For the th year in a row!

[Beeping]

Huh?

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

[Shrieking]

Huh?

Huh?

[Gasps]

Trespassing in an unauthorized vehicle.

That's against the rules.

Uh...sorry.

I--i didn't know.

I'm from... Out of town.

Ignorance of the law

Is no excuse for breaking it, punk.

I see your face around here again,

You and I are gonna have a problem.

Yeah--yes, sir.

Now get this into your head, jack fenton,

There are some things more important

Than hunting ghosts!

[Danny panting]

I know, I know.

I'm just as freaked out

By your mother's reaction as you are.

♪ He's a phantom

♪ Danny phantom, danny phantom ♪

♪ Yo, danny fenton, he was just ♪

♪ When his parents built a very strange machine ♪

♪ It was designed to view a world unseen ♪

♪ He's gonna catch 'em all 'cause he's danny phantom ♪

♪ When it didn't quite work, his folks, they just quit ♪

♪ Then danny took a look inside of it ♪

♪ There was a great big flash, everything just changed ♪

♪ His molecules got all rearranged ♪

[Screaming]

♪ When he first woke up, he realized ♪

♪ He had snow white hair and glowing green eyes ♪

♪ He could walk through walls, disappear, and fly ♪

♪ He was much more unique than the other guys ♪

♪ It was then that he knew what he had to do ♪

♪ He had to stop all the ghosts that were coming through ♪

♪ He's here to fight for me and you ♪

♪ He's gonna catch 'em all because he's danny phantom ♪

♪ Gonna catch 'em all 'cause he's danny phantom ♪

♪ Gonna catch 'em all 'cause he's danny phantom ♪

[Horn honking]

Jack: maddie, please, don't go!

I just have a little more work to do

On the specter speeder, and then I'm done.

We discussed this, jack, remember?

Visiting my sister?

The divorce?

There's a casserole in the freezer

Right next to the ectoplasmic residue samples!

Wait, wait, wait!

How will I know which is which?

Divorce?

What?

Jazz,

Did you just hear that?

Hear what?

Mom yelling at dad?

Relax. She'll get over it.

Yeah, but I have never heard her so mad.

Of course she's mad.

And if I'm right,

Dad will once again cluelessly do nothing

To apologize to her.

That's where you're wrong, jazmine.

I have been a little preoccupied

With ghosts lately.

So, I'm traveling to your aunt alicia's

In spittoon, arkansas, to apologize,

And give your mother

The greatest anniversary gift ever.

[Grunts]

Jack: wish me luck!

Oh, and call me if you see a ghost!

Jazz?

Are mom and dad gonna split up?

I was...

Wrong?!

Jazz?

Jazz?!

Wait.

He's going to arkansas...

To apologize?

I was wrong?

Jazz: I don't understand.

Every piece of evidence I have

Indicates dad would never be self-aware enough

To realize he made a mistake.

If I'm wrong about this,

What else could I have been wrong about?

[Rattling]

Danny, keep it down, would you?!

Hey!

I'm trying to make this place spotless

So mom will have a clean house to come home to.

Well, I need to concentrate.

Ugh! I'll be at the library.

Oh, my gosh.

This place is a mess!

If mom comes back and sees the lab like this,

She'll be even angrier at dad.

[Sighs]

[Gasps]

"Let this gift repair the bridge to our love.

Happy anniversary, jack."

Oh, no.

[Oink, oink]

Um, excuse me.

Will we be landing soon?

sh**t, honey,

There ain't no airport in spittoon.

[Goat bleats]

Thank y'all for flying air grits!

[Screaming]

I been out here for nearly a decade, mattie.

And as you can see,

I'm incredibly happy.

I don't know, alicia.

Just because something works for you

Doesn't mean it works for everybody.

You're an intelligent woman, mattie--

Runs in the family.

You gonna spend the best years of your life

Being ignored by some fool

Who believes in ghosts?

[Thump]

[Jack screams]

Ghost!

[Yelps]

Jack?

[Sigh]

I'll get the antiseptic.

[Bell rings]

Danny: you should have seen 'em fighting.

My folks never fight.

Well, they fight ghosts,

But...that's different.

Danny, relax.

Nobody gets divorced

Over not getting a gift.

But it's the thing my dad's gonna use

To apologize.

They're right on the brink!

I'm telling you,

Anything could set them over the edge.

Danny, you're fine.

I mean, it's not like your mom

Actually said the word "divorce."

I mean, if she actually said the word,

Then you'd have to worry.

Said the word?

Oh, man.

She did!

She said the word!

Tucker,

Say something to calm him down!

Well...uh...

Did she say it twice?

That settles it.

I'm going into the ghost zone

And get that present back.

Well...

Well, what?

You've been sitting here

Sipping lemonade for an hour!

If you're gonna apologize to my sister,

I suggest you start apologizing!

I...

[Rumbles]

Hold that thought!

Ain't no bathroom in there.

Ain't no outhouse out there!

You know, in his own way,

He really is trying.

Alicia: I don't understand why

You think you need him, mattie.

Look at me!

Been single years

And I'm a calm, sensible,

Independent woman and--[twig snaps]

Hey, don't you whiz on that, jack fenton!

That's rhubarb!

I've never been happier.

I so don't want to do this.

You get in, get the present,

And get out. You'll be fine.

Tucker: besides, with this mini web cam,

I'll be with you every step of the way.

But first...

[Video game music plays]

You'll monitor the web cam?

I'll monitor the web cam.

Samantha: wow.

This place is amazing.

No, it's not.

It's creepy.

And it goes on forever.

I don't even know where to start to look.

Uh...

Hi.

Ha ha.

Have you seen a-- a present--

About yea big?

[Snarls]

Get out of my room!

[Roars]

Sorry! Sorry!

[Screams]

Oh, man.

Every one of these doors

Goes into another ghost's lair.

I'm never gonna find that present.

My folks are gonna get divorced

And it's gonna be all my fault.

[Gasps]

[Shrieking]

[Screaming]

Samantha: relax, danny.

We all just have to stay focused.

Right, tucker?

Tucker?

I can't believe danny didn't want to

Take the specter speeder.

This thing rocks!

[Horn blares]

He can cover more ground on his own.

But it's got a cup-holder.

Hey, what's this thing do?

Scanner: real world items detected.

Cool!

It's a scanner.

Real world items?

Tucker: danny, I think we can guide you to the present.

Samantha: there's a doorway coming up on your left.

Take it.

Huh?

So, this is where all that stuff ends up.

Man: yes!

It all ends up in the possession of...

The box ghost!

[Sighs]

What are you doing here?

I am the box ghost!

Where do you think we go

When you release us from your

Round, cylindrical trap?

You mean the fenton thermos?

I am the box ghost!

And beware!

For I am merely one of your foes

Who reside in this realm.

In fact, you might say...

We're a package deal!

[Laughing]

Ay.

Look, I'm looking for something important.

I don't have time for your box puns.

[Siren blares]

Flee!

Lest you be hermetically sealed

And shipped to your doom!

Hey!

What's going on?

[Grunts]

Man: possession of

Unauthorized recording equipment.

That's against the rules.

Or at least it is now.

Wait!

This is all a big misunderstanding.

There might be chaos everywhere else

In this ghost zone,

But there'll be order in my prison.

You should have heeded my warning, punk.

Now you and I have a problem.

Great.

My folks are splitting up,

My sister's a basket case,

And I'm going to ghost jail.

This may be the worst day of my life.

Well...

If it isn't the young whelp

Who helped us get locked up in this stinking place

Welcome home.

This is the worst day of my life.

I am the box ghost!

Will you stop that?!

[Cracks knuckles]

Tucker: danny? Danny?!

Talk to me!

It's no use. He can't hear us.

Then we'll just have to go in after him.

What are you, nuts?

Jazz: danny? Are you down there?

Sam? Hello?

Anyone?

I was hoping someone could

Go over every excruciating detail

Of my personal diaries

To look for miniscule errors.

You drive.

Hmm.

I thought I heard someone down here.

Oh, no!

I was wrong again!

Cop: trespassing, loitering,

Creating a disturbance,

And possession of real-world contraband.

[Straining]

Excuse me, sir,

But-but--

Name's walker, son.

Know it, fear it,

Obey it.

I am your judge, executioner,

Jury, executioner,

Jailer, and if necessary,

Your executioner.

Uh, you said executioner times.

I like that part of the job.

Well, you see,

Mr. Walker, the truth is,

I'm actually trying to remove the contraband.

So, if I could just grab it and go...

Ha ha-- I promise I'll--

I'd like to let you go, son,

But I can't.

That would be against the rules.

But seeing how this is a first offense,

I'm willing to be lenient.

, Years!

[Ting]

[Ting]

Excuse me.

Do you gentlemen have a bathroom?

Outhouse?

Place I can whiz?

Can't you use alicia's rhubarb?

You nuts?

In the mood she's in!

Didn't you hear about the divorce?

Divorce?

Oh, no.

Alicia must have gotten to maddie,

And word is spreading through the southern grapevine.

[Ting]

I don't have a minute to lose.

But first...

Which way was the rhubarb again?

Jasper, get your teeth fixed!

You're giving the rest of us a bad name!

[Ting]

Chow time.

Move it out.

[Gasps]

Ha ha ha.

Wow.

Pretty much everyone who hates me

All at one table--

Just like high school.

Sorry I can't stay and catch up on old times!

Woman: can I get you anything, dearie?

Coffee? Pudding?

An extra helping of doom?!

[Screams]

[Laughing]

[Grunting]

Payback time, ghost child.

Wait!

I'm not the enemy here.

I mean, yeah,

I sent you all back to the ghost zone,

But I didn't lock you up here, did i?

It is true!

He did not package us in this box of iron!

I am the--

Go on.

If we work together,

We can all bust out of here.

And you can always kick my butt later.

The enemy of my enemy is my friend,

For now.

Here's what we do...

Samantha: face it, tucker,

We're lost.

If I can just recalibrate the scanner.

You put way too much faith in technology.

Let's just get out and ask that girl for directions.

Hello there.

I want to go to the ball!

Drive, tucker, drive!

[Chanting "fight, fight!"]

[Crunch]

[Screaming]

Oh!

My ghost leg!

Ha!

My prey ceases to amuse me.

Another one for the infirmary.

[Grunts]

Now!

att*ck!

[All yelling]

[Screams]

Could I offer you gentlemen some apples?

Then dine on my fury!

[All screaming]

[Yelling]

Skulker: you're going the wrong way!

Yes, sweetie.

You're supposed to riot with the guards here

And face your doom out there!

Pie?

No thanks.

I have some unfinished business

With the warden.

Ok.

Good luck, child.

I look forward to hunting you

On the other side.

Thanks...

I think.

Can't this tub go any faster?

I'm trying!

We're also looking for danny, too, you know.

[Roaring]

[Samantha grunts]

Scanner: real-world item detected.

Sweet.

Tucker, look out!

File that one under

"Would have been nice to know

We could do that trick in the first place."

Guards!

What's going on down there?

Somebody answer me!

How 'bout saying "please."

Saying please is a rule.

It is?

Is now.

The present!

[Grunts]

Now, let me acquaint you with a few rules.

Rule one:

You cross me,

You pay the consequences.

Rule two:

Just because you're a ghost

Doesn't mean I can't crush you

Within an inch of your afterlife.

Rule ...

Tucker! Sam!

How'd you get in here?

Check it out!

Real-world stuff just phases through

Everything in here.

In the ghost zone,

We're the ghosts.

We're the ghosts?

So, maybe it's time to stop

Fighting like a ghost,

And start fighting like a kid.

I'll take that.

Why can't I touch you?!

Forget it, walker.

This is the ghost zone.

I'm not just a ghost,

I'm human.

Your rules don't apply.

No!

Jack: why, hey there...

Pretty young thing!

Jack fenton,

What on earth are you doing?

Why, sweet-talking you.

Proving I can step away from work

And pay attention to our relationship.

Uh...ah! Here we go.

[Clears throat]

You got a smile that shines like

Swamp gas in the moonlight.

Your mind twinkles like the moon

Off my the bumper of my pickum-up truck.

And...and...

Oh, this is stupid.

What's stupid, jack?

Anything besides ghosts?

No, but pretending I'm something I'm not is.

Maddie, you know I can be a fool,

And you know I can forget things.

But the one thing you know more than anything,

Even more than that ghosts exist

And that your sister is a bitter old bat,

Is that I love you, baby.

Oh, jack!

And...

Uh, I wanted to give you...

To give you...

I'm coming, mattie!

Oh, crud!

You forgot the present, didn't you?

[Door opens]

Told you he was a fool!

Well, i...

I...

Danny: no, he didn't!

[Plane engine zooms]

He kept it at home

So the mosquitoes... Wouldn't get it.

Good boy.

You're getting a raise in your allowance for this.

I have an allowance?

Happy anniversary, baby!

And I'm sorry.

I'll try to be better

About things in the future.

So, you guys aren't getting a divorce?

Divorce?!

Who said anything about us

Getting a divorce?

[Horn honking]

[Cheering and laughing]

Surprise!surprise!

[Cheering]

A party!

For the tenth anniversary of my divorce!

[Sniffles]

You remembered!

Well, sure.

I even convinced your ex-husband to come.

Get set to get wet, yuppie!

[Bell rings]

Whoo-ha!

[Hooting]

Well, aren't you going to open the present?

I am the box ghost!

They weren't ever going to get a divorce.

It was a huge misunderstanding.

But...

Dad doesn't apologize.

Dad doesn't understand what a goof he can be.

These are constants.

Beware!

Both: ghost!

Ah, sweet normalcy.

I'll take being right and embarrassed

Over being wrong every time.

What some rhubarb pie?

Love some.

I'd stay away from that

If I was you.

[Ting]

♪ Billionfold, inc.