01x03 - The Darkest Secret

[bunniefuu]

In January 2004,

Dan Schneider launches
his next big show.

Nickelodeon presents
Drake & Josh,

premiering January 11th.

It's one that would
go on to establish

the next generation
of Nick stars.

He's gonna be my...

Hug me, brother!

The hit Nickelodeon show,
Drake & Josh.

If you have a tween
at home,

you're probably familiar
with the Nickelodeon show,

Drake & Josh.

Nickelodeon star,
Drake Bell,

is a multi-talented singer,
writer and actor.

I just released this single,

it's number one on the rock
charts right now in Mexico.

We want Drake! We want Drake!

He's beautiful.

You k*lled it, brother.

Thank you, man.
Thank you so much.

But it was the lead up to
this premier of Drake and Josh

that marked one of the darkest
chapters in this story.

Dialogue coach,
Brian Peck, is arrested.

We were still in shock
of the announcement

that Brian will no longer
be working with us.

We were like, "What happened?"

And when this is announced,

it is said that these charges
are related to a child actor.

It certainly has
all of the ingredients

for huge scandal.

But it wasn't.

My name is Drake Bell,

and I came here today
to tell my story.

Have you ever told your story
publicly before?

I have never
told my story publicly.

No.

I started acting
when I was five years old.

My mom and my dad
were going through divorce,

and my dad was
looking for something

to do with his son.

I love to make people laugh.

It was just drawn
to old movies,

anything black and white.

I Love Lucy
andAbbott and Costello

and Jerry Lewis
and Dean Martin

and the Marx Brothers.

I saw a magazine called
the parenting magazine,

I started shuffling through it
and I saw an advertisement for

the Kids Hollywood Connection.

And I thought,
"Whoa, that's something

that Drake could do.

Robin, my ex-wife,
she said, "Oh, that's great."

And I started taking him
to auditions.

Then got
a manager and an agent,

and then we were off.

Pop, he knows everything.

Wouldn't it be fun to fly?

the candy bar.

No,.

Me just being a kid,

and my dad not coming from
having any background it,

we were sort of just flying
by the seat of our pants.

He started getting
some commercials

and doing things like that.

You can't catch
all 150 Pokemon by yourself.

So close.

Then we just continued

the everyday picking him up
at 3:30 at school.

Go out, audition,

wouldn't get home
until 10:00, 11:00 at night.

Go back, do the same thing
the next day.

Him and I just became so close

that it was like
it was just natural.

And he loved it.

As I grew older,

I did more guest spots
on TV shows in the late 90s.

He'd booked
Home Improvement.

And Drake came on as
a little construction guy.

Thank you for my swing set,
Mr. Tool Man.

He also did an episode
of Seinfeld,

where George Costanza is

wanting this video machine,

and Drake's
in there playing it.

Thanks a lot.

Eh, b*at it, punk.

And then he got the role
forJerry Maguire.

As he's walking down the hall,

he turns back to Tom Cruise

and he's supposed
to flip him off.

But Drake wouldn't even
use his middle finger.

He used the ring finger.

If you watch the movie,
you'll see that.

But you gotta look real close.

And the goal, eventually,
you know, became to

get on a TV show and...

be a series regular
somehow, someway.

I don't believe this.

Look at this, Jill.

You see, Jill,
a regular student

wouldn't give this discarded piece
of rubbish a second glance...

Then, when we was 12,

an audition came up for
The Amanda Show

on Nickelodeon.

So we're walking down
the hallway of Paramount,

and Drake had just
done an audition.

Dan Schneider comes out and
says, "Hey, come here, Drake."

And he goes,
"Amanda wants you on the show."

And then I got a call
that I had booked the show,

and that was just
the greatest experience ever.

I mean, I had been waiting
for this moment

to be able to go
somewhere every day

and do what I love.

And, you know,
it's Nickelodeon,

so it's a kid's dream.

For the first season,
it was great.

You know, we were at
the Paramount Studios.

Any time those lights went up

and the camera
started rolling,

it was just...

It was like time to play.

There were a lot of really fun
sketches and characters.

Like, Totally Kyle

was, like, this surfer dude,
and he'd tell like these...

wacky stories.

You know, "One time, uh...

I saw a spider...

And I was all, "Ah! Spider!"

And the spider was all...

"Ah! Kyle!"

It was just a lot of fun.

Dan would be down on set,

and we'd hear him laughing.

And then he'd come up and he'd

give us different, you know,
ways to play something

and make it funnier.

Everything was
really, really cool.

Until we got to...

Nickelodeon on Sunset.

When we moved
over to Nick on Sunset

from Paramount Studios,

Brian Peck came in
during the second season.

Brian was a dialogue coach
onThe Amanda Show.

And met him the first day

the second season
when we did a table read.

He got along with everyone.

Everyone got along with him.

He'd been working
in the industry

for a very, very long time.

He knew tons about
the history Hollywood,

and that's what I loved.

We would just rap about
stuff like that.

It's like reading a book about
the history of Hollywood.

I was told that
Brian was a good coach

and that he could really
get Drake some jobs.

He worked with
Leonardo DiCaprio,

he worked with this person,
that person.

I said, "Oh, okay."

Well, he said, "Oh, well,
you need to come to my house

because that's where
I give the lessons."

So we started using him
as an acting coach.

Everything seemed okay
in the beginning.

But I was always within
eye distance of them.

And it was just really fun
to go to Brian's house.

He would have parties.

Parents, they were there.

He had this really cool house

with all of this
Hollywood memorabilia,

and it was just a house
you wanted to live in.

He just seemed like...

any other...

nice co-worker...

you know, at that point.

Brian and I became
really close

because we had a lot of
the same interests.

Which, looking back,
I think that was probably

a little calculated.

You hear the scuttlebutt
about the business,

and you got to watch your
kids, and this and that,

so I was very attentive.

All the other parents
would be seen and not heard,

which I would never
interrupt anything,

but very rarely
sat in the green room,

I'd always be off set.

Somewhere where I could always
keep my eyes on Drake.

And unfortunately,
I started with seeing

Brian just start to
hang around Drake too much.

And it didn't
set well with me.

Drake would be in the
dressing room or something,

and in would pop Brian.

And, um...

Uh...

Just touch Drake.

You know, do things that...

"Wait a second,
what are you doing?

Drake can put that
on his self."

And the thing is,
this is in front of people.

Then he'd maybe
walk over to Drake

and be feeding him
some lines or whatever,

and put his arm
around his waist,

put his hand
up on his shoulder

and kind of run it
down his arm.

And things like that.

And this would
happen routinely.

Was just always uncomfortable.

Leo, as you know,

the latest, hottest, hunkiest
teen idol there is.

Yeah, these muscles.

I saw this video
of Brian Peck

onGrowing Pains
with Leonardo DiCaprio.

Grabbing his shoulder,

run it across him
and going down his arms.

That's the kind of behavior
I saw him with my son.

Same frickin' behavior.

So I went to production

and said, you know, "I really
am very uncomfortable

with this guy, Brian Peck...

always being around my son."

I go, "I don't see
anything abnormal,

but it just doesn't...

I don't have a good feeling."

And she just goes,
"Oh, well, I don't know

if you knew it or not,
but he's gay.

Maybe you're just h*m*,
and you just...

You know, you just
don't understand

that he's a touchy-feely guy."

So I said, "Okay."

And then it just... it just...

kept not setting well with me.

So I told people on the set.

And I was ostracized.

And so I backed off.

Brian was still my friend,
everything was fine.

I didn't think anything of
anything that was happening.

In hindsight,
I should've been able to...

see, but as a kid,
you have no clue.

My dad saw it a mile away.

During theAmanda Show,

we were still working
on the next idea

for what would be
the Drake & Josh show.

We were working on a sketch
for The Amanda Show.

Hey, shrimp.

Josh and I get into,
like, a tussle

over this... this...

grilled shrimp that had landed
from the sky.

Give it!

No! No! I want it!

One of the writers
of The Amanda Show

had leaned over to
Dan and said,

"Hey, you know,
Nickelodeon's looking for

some sort of new
buddy comedy."

And he pointed to the monitor
and he goes,

"There's your buddies
right there."

I want the shrimp!

-I will get you--
-I want the shrimp!

Dan took me out
to lunch one day.

We went to a place
called Off Vine,

right next to Nick on Sunset.

He was saying, you know,
"I'm coming up with this idea

for you and Josh.

Would you be interested
in doing that?"

We couldn't believe it.

I mean, me and my dad
just drove home just going,

"What in the world?
Like, this is...

This is what
I've always dreamed of."

We were excited.

But that's right when Brian
had got his hooks in.

He's the one that started
telling Drake that

I shouldn't be his manager.

And I confronted Brian
about that.

And he goes, "Well, parents
shouldn't be their child's managers."

And I just blew it off.

Because I don't think
that was ever gonna happen.

So Brian started
integrating himself

into my life pretty heavily.

He would come to my concerts.

And that's when it started
to get a little bit, um...

A little bit more
extracurricular than normal.

Like, Dan might have
come to a concert

if it was really close to him.

But Brian would drive
to San Diego

to see a concert
I was playing.

At that time,
totally normal to me.

Then there was a time
that I set up a concert

at Strawberry Festival
for Drake and his band.

And who pops up? Brian Peck.

Who pops up? Brian's friends.

And they're following Drake

all through
the Strawberry Festival.

And I'm just going,
"What is this?"

It was my first band
that I'd ever played with.

Brand new.

Just exciting
to be playing live,

and it was just like,
"My friends are coming to my shows."

Like, "Cool."

And then there was
a birthday party for Drake.

And Brian wanted
to have it at his house.

And I said, "Whoa, Brian,
I don't want Drake

having his birthday party
at your house."

It was
my 15th birthday.

Brian had suggested,

"Oh, hey, you can perform,
and everybody can come."

I lived in Orange County
which was an hour away,

and everyone I wanted
to come to my birthday

was who I worked with
on the show.

And so it made it easy.

It just didn't seem
like something

that was that
out of the ordinary.

Then after I got his
presents out of the car,

I looked in a bag

and I saw these, um...

birthday cards from
Brian's friends

that were at the party,

and they were
really inappropriate.

They just had
adult things in them,

adult descriptions.

And I thought,
"Woah, this is..."

And then I said,
"Drake, what is this?"

He goes, "I don't know.
I didn't even know I have those."

And so we just
left it at that.

The situation
with Brian

is it had all been
building up.

And so my dad started
making it very difficult

for Brian to be around me.

I think Brian got a sense
that my dad was...

on the watch.

And so he started
to really drive a wedge

between my dad and me.

He started talking about

how my dad's
stealing my money,

nobody likes
that my dad's on set,

he's a real problem.

So he just started
making me believe that

he was horrible for my career,

I wasn't gonna be able to
move forward with him in it.

And coming from
someone like Brian,

I was believing it
because he's...

been in this business
for so long

and he must know more than us.

Also because I was
spending so much time

more so around him
than I was really my dad.

I think Drake was so
distraught over everything

that he avoided me.

Which is understandable.

He was under a lot of,
"I don't want my dad to be my manager.

I feel guilty about that."

And my mom and my dad

had a very tumultuous
relationship.

They did not get along.

And I think Brian saw that.

So Brian really started
getting into my mom's mind

and telling her
the same things

he was telling me.

He found an attorney

to find out about Drake's
financial situation.

There was never
any mishandling of any funds.

But it was like
an army against my dad.

After that, Drake had stayed
with his mom for about a week,

and then I got a phone call
from his mom.

Saying, "Drake doesn't want
you to be his manager anymore."

And my dad was like,

"Is this what you want to do?"

At that time,

I said, "I want what
my son wants."

It's k*lling me,
it's hurting me...

It's breaking my heart,

but I want to do
what Drake wants."

So, I said, "Okay."

Our relationship was
just completely eviscerated.

I think he felt like
he was going through

the divorce with my mom
all over again.

And fighting for me again,

you know, just like he did

when I was five years old,
you know?

Oh, man, this will
make me cry,

thinking about it like that.

Um...

I broke down and cried.

I knew that was gonna

sever me and my
son's relationship.

And that I wouldn't
be seeing him.

And, uh,

it wasn't like he was
five years old,

where I could say,
"Give me my visitation."

Because Drake was old enough
to make his own decisions.

So I turned her over,
you know, the bank account,

I turned her over
all kinds of...

paperwork that she needed

to be able to handle
Drake's career.

But I did say to her,

and I said this to her
in person, I said,

"But...

you never...

ever leave Drake alone
with Brian Peck,

and you never let him
be around him

unsupervised, period,
whatsoever.

And Brian just
absolutely tricked her.

He knew that I loved
going to Disneyland.

He would say, "Hey,
me and my friends are going to Disneyland

you know, would you
like to come?"

And we'd go spend
the whole day there

and have a great time.

This point, production of
The Amanda Show was over.

There was all this just time
of, like, floating around.

We hadn't gone into production
forDrake and Josh.

And we hadn't sh*t the pilot.

There was a huge gap.

And then, very, very quickly,

Brian put himself
in the position

of what my dad was doing
my whole life.

My mom didn't want
to drive to LA.

She didn't like driving.

So Brian would come
and pick me up for auditions.

I would end up
staying the night

because, well, I lived
in Orange County

and I would have auditions,
and then it would be,

you know, easier to drive me
home the next day

instead of driving me home and
getting me home at midnight,

or whatever...
Whatever excuse, you know,

he came up with.

And that's the way
it happened, uh...

for quite a while.

He had... he had pretty much

worked his way into
every aspect of my life.

Everything changed
with Brian one morning.

It just... everything...

I knew that everything...

I knew that my life was gonna be
absolutely, completely different

from that point on.

I was sleeping on the couch
where I would usually sleep.

And, uh...

I woke up to him...

uh...

I... I...

I opened my eyes, I woke up.

And he was, uh...

He was sexually assaulting me.

And...

I froze and was in
complete shock

and had no idea what...

to do

or how to react.

And...

I had no idea how to
get out of the situation.

I couldn't run outside,
have my--

I mean-- I just--

You know, what am I gonna
call my mom and be like,

"Hey, this just happened.
Can you come and pick me up?

I'll just sit here and wait."

I had no car, I didn't drive.

I was 15 at this time.

And so...

it just became this...

this secret
that I had held onto.

And it became...

You know, I couldn't say I no longer
wanted to go to Brian's house,

because then they're gonna
raise questions,

"Well, why don't you want
to go to Brian's?"

And then, you know,
he's so apologetic,

"Oh, this will never
happen again,

I'm so sorry," you know--

"I don't know what
got into me."

And, "I crossed the line."

And, "This will never
happen again."

Um...

And, well...

He figured out how to...

convince my mom
and everyone around to...

have me--

You know, anytime I would
have an audition,

or any time I need to work
on dialogue or anything,

I somehow ended up
back at Brian's house.

And it just got worse

and worse and worse...

and, um...

and worse.

And...

I was just trapped.

And I didn't...

I had...

I had no way out.

The abuse was extensive.

And it got, uh...

pretty brutal.

Pretty brutal. Um...

I don't know, uh...

I really don't know
how to, uh...

Um...

elaborate on that
on camera, really.

Whatever you feel comfortable,
or you think would--

- Why don't you do this?
- Yeah.

I don't you think of
the worst stuff

that someone could do
to somebody

as a sexual as*ault,

and that'll answer
your question.

I don't know
how else to put it.

It was not a...

one-time thing,
it was not a...

"Oops, I...

No, it was-- I mean--

Ah!

I often look back at that time

and wonder how
in the world I survived.

I remember all
of the abusive events.

But...

everything outside of that
is very blurry to me.

Which is a bummer
because I, uh...

I experienced a lot of
great things in my life,

in my career
during all this time.

But it was
so overshadowed and...

and ruined by

what I was dealing with
on the inside.

Um, that...

it made it really hard for me.

I didn't feel like
anyone knew anything.

I was...

under the impression that this
was just a big, giant secret.

I just hoped and prayed

that one day
it would just stop.

And then I got a girlfriend,

and I was basically
spending all of my time

at my girlfriend's house
because I felt...

so safe there.

And her mom...

It took her about
six seconds...

to, uh...

to catch on to
what was going on.

There was this time
that I was at her house,

and Brian had planned
to take me to Disneyland.

I was like,
"This is not happening.

I'm not going...

"I don't-- No."

And Brian's calling
my cell phone non-stop.

I was just ignoring it.

Well, he started calling
my girlfriend's house.

Non-stop.

I mean, over and over
and over and over.

Finally, her mom answered.

And brought it to me.

And he's like, "What are you doing?
We had plans."

People are watching me
on the phone,

so I just played it off like,
"I must've made double plans,

but I'm... I'm gonna
hang here tonight.

And he got really upset.

And I hung up the phone.

And he started calling back
and calling back.

My girlfriends mom said,
"Hey, Drake,

can I talk to you
in the kitchen for a second?"

She shuts the door behind me
so it's just the two of us.

She's like, "What's going on?"

And I go...

"Oh, yeah, Brian,
we had plans"

She goes, "No, no, no, no.

A 40-something year old man

does not call
my daughter's boyfriend

like that.

My girlfriends mom asked,
"What's going on?"

And I go...

"Oh, you know,
he is kind of strange.

I'm trying to distance
myself from him

because, like, things
are getting a little weird."

So, she took matters
into her own hands.

She called my mom, she's like,

"I'm taking Drake to see
our therapist tomorrow

because something...

Something is going on.

And we need to
figure it out because...

Seems like he's
in quite a bit of danger."

I'm so I went
to the therapist and...

I just felt so scared
to say anything,

I didn't know
how to explain it.

I mean, I still don't.
I mean, I'm still like...

You know, I've never...

talked about this
outside of...

therapy, which...

And, uh...

Um...

And I just... I just said,

"Nah, you know, it's...
Everything's...

Everything's normal.

It's just, you know,
things are getting a little weird, but...

But nothing's happened." Uh...

You know, "Good thing we caught
it when we did," you know.

And then I realized...

it was just so calculated,
you know, it's just...

I was like, "Wow, you got...

you moved all the pieces
into place."

The whole thing
was mental manipulation.

He was so integrated
in all of these

different productions,

and the knew these
directors and these producers,

that if I...

were to...

say anything or...

do anything...

that...

he had the ability
to basically...

go, "You're never gonna work
with this person,

you're never gonna work
with that person."

So, it was me believing
that I would

never be able
to do this ever again.

And I would have to go...

figure out
how to wax surfboards or...

You know?

I didn't want to risk that.

You know, I was doing
what I loved to do and...

And so I just kept it inside.

We ended up having to re-sh**t
the pilot forDrake & Josh.

And Brian was trying to get me

to convince Dan

that he should be
the dad on the show.

And...

I was like,
"That is not gonna happen.

You're not coming
anywhere near the show."

And then...

one day, I was just
on the phone to my mom.

I just exploded.

I have no idea
what provoked it,

I have no idea what happened.

But I just...

screamed into the phone...

everything...

that had been happening to me.

My mom immediately
called the police,

and within I don't know
how much time,

I was sitting in...

the dining room
of my mom's house

with a few detectives
and my mom,

being asked what happened.

The investigation
was pretty brutal.

I had to, uh...

be, uh...

excruciatingly detailed...

uh...

about every single...

thing-- time that it
had happened...

with two absolute strangers.

The worst part was

I had to make
a phone call to Brian

and get him to admit...

um...

what he had done.

And so...

there I was in this room
of my mom's house.

It looked like a movie.

They had old-style
tape recorder...

attached to a black
phone, landline.

You know, they had their
headphones on.

I took a couple of times.

Then I had called...

he answers.

So I said...

"You know, I'm really
struggling with...

with this stuff now and..."

Like, "I'm so torn up,
I'm so broken

I... I can't...

I'm so emotionally
distressed right now."

And, "Why... Why did...

Why did this happen?"

You know?

He just started
a full-on confession.

And then...

He kept asking me
over and over again.

He's like,
"Are we being recorded?"

It was just all these
mixed emotions of... of...

"Thank God. Finally."

This...

Finally, this gets handled.

Finally, something happens
to this person.

I was like, "What next?

What next?" You know?

"Am I gonna get to
make my show?

Is this gonna be public?"

I was losing my hair.

I had these big scabs
on my head.

I was going to the doctor,

and the doctor was asking me,

"You know, all of your
vitals are fine,

but how is the...

How's your stress level
these days?"

I'm like, "It's very high."

And then Brian got arrested...

for doing really, really
horrendous things to me.

These emotions that we're
going through me were...

It's... It's relief and fear.

You know, "Am I...

going to survive this?"

That's when my phone
started blowing up.

"Did you hear
what happened to Brian?"

I just hope that
nobody knew it was me.

After Brian was arrested,

Dan called and asked me...

"Does this have anything
to do with you?"

I was close enough with Dan

that I was like,
"Yeah, man, like, this is...

This was what he's been doing.

And Dan just goes,

"You don't need to talk
anymore about it.

That's all I needed to hear.
Are you okay?"

You know, "Do you need
anything from me?

Is there anything
that you need?"

Brian was spending
so much time...

around me that it was
pretty obvious.

I get a phone call
from Drake.

I go, "What's up?
I haven't heard from you for a while."

And I was like...
Did you see they got him?

I go, "What do you mean?"

"Brian, they arrested him."

And Drake says,

"They arrested him
for a molestation."

I go, "You're kidding.

I knew it. i knew it."

And my dad just goes,
"I am so glad

that he was not able
to get his hands on you."

My dad's very emotional,
and I've just...

We were starting to rekindle
our relationship,

and I just couldn't...

So I just said, "Yeah,
you know, they got him."

He's like, "Oh, I'm so glad.

I knew he was gonna
do something to someone."

How did it make you feel
when you finally found out?

I was-- are you kidding? I'm--

I'm not the same today.

The pain's still there
from the moment that I knew.

It's just that...

I don't wish this
on any parent

or child whatsoever.

It's just devastating.

It took quite a while
to go to court.

But a few weeks
after he was arrested,

I had started
sh**ting the show,

Drake & Josh.

Thank God that I loved
what I was doing.

When I was on set
and doing a scene with Josh,

I was able to lose myself
and just have fun.

Hey, Josh.

You wanna go play
any basket--

Sometimes you'd find
yourself on a red carpet

or an event
or something like that.

We're stepbrothers
on the show,

and he's kind of
the nerdy, wacky kid,

and I'm kind of
the "think I'm cool" guy,

but I'm not really
that smooth.

It was just exciting.

But that juxtaposed
with one of the most...

You know, probably the most...

traumatic experiences
of my life.

I didn't know
how to process it.

And I think
that led to a lot of...

A lot of self destruction

and a lot of, uh...

self loathing,
really, you know?

So I would try and just escape

with alcohol abuse,
substance abuse.

Um...

Really just anything to...

escape, really.

And it was difficult, too,

because on one hand, your...

employer and...

the people who are
making money off of you...

are saying, "You have to be
this great role model."

And I'm...

sitting at home, going...

"I don't know
how to be a role model.

Nor do I have the ability or
capability at this point."

I'm curious,
you know, after the arrest,

after this happened,

did anyone at Nickelodeon,
any executives

talk to you, reach out to you?

You know,
I'm not really certain

how many people knew...

who...

it was.

It wasn't really
brought up to me a lot.

Maybe because, you know,
it's very sensitive subject.

Um...

But really, the only...

person that I remember...

being there for me...

uh, was Dan.

Unfortunately, there was
no therapy,

and was left
to my own devices,

which, at that age,
probably isn't the best thing.

There's a long period,
and then we go to sentencing.

I was hoping that
the outcome would be

he goes to jail,

he is there for a while,

and that he would
never be able to

work with kids again,

which would, in turn,
pretty much mean

that you're not gonna
work in Hollywood,

because very few productions

don't have at least
one kid on the set.

Is that what happened?

No, that is not what happened.

That's not what
happened at all.