- Previously
on "RuPaul's Drag Race..."
You'll be competing
in The Last Ball on Earth.
[cheers and applause]
- Monet X Change.
- Your Mars look
looks really sloppy.
Like Mars-y in a school play.
- Aquaria.
- If I could define
each one of your looks,
it'd be showstopper.
- Thank you.
- Dusty Ray Bottoms.
- It's a faerie.
- Asia O'Hara.
How many of the girls
did you help with their sewing?
- I helped everybody
with their look.
I felt like my time was spent...
my time was spent
better helping them.
- Asia, you need
to take care of yourself first.
Aquaria, con-drag-ulations.
You are the winner
of this week's challenge.
[applause]
- Monet X Change,
shantay, you stay.
Dusty Ray Bottoms, sashay away.
- All right, Miss Thing,
you made it.
- Girl, what is Dusty saying?
"Never loved you."
- Two New York City girls
have gone one after the other.
To see them go
so early in the competition
is like a big wake-up call.
What you do back home
does not matter.
It's how you excel here that
really matters at this point.
- Congratulations.
- Congratulations, Aquaria.
- It took me a while,
but I got here.
Asia, you helped every
single person in this room.
How do you feel right now?
- Well, I kind of feel used.
It sucked because
I put off doing stuff
that I knew
that I needed to finish
to do whatever needed
to be done in the room,
and it was just like
not a single person,
not one time
this entire challenge,
ever came over to me
at my station
or say, hey, are you cool,
do you need anything?
Not one person.
- I'm kind of confused.
Asia's upset with everyone
because she offered
everyone help.
I said thank you.
- Tisha Campbell,
I looked up to her
so much when I was a kid.
And then I stand up there
in this sh*t in front of her,
to have her look at me, and have
something negative to say,
and y'all are standing there big
shower and accolades about her,
it breaks my heart.
- Well, hold on.
Because when you give a gift,
you have to give it freely.
I don't want you to feel down
about the people in this room.
You have such a strong front,
you never look like
you need help.
All of them
would love to help you.
Am I crazy?
- No.
- No.
- I think first, in response,
I'm not down,
I'm shaken back to reality.
- I think that there's
a giving atmosphere,
and what you presented to me
doesn't smell like reality.
It smells like a whole different
plate of food,
and I don't wanna eat it.
Girl, Asia learned
a very important lesson today.
When something goes wrong,
you can only blame
your friends.
- I think it's a little naive
to not acknowledge the fact
that this is a competition,
because it is what it is.
- I can't accept that.
Everybody started this
because there was something
inside of them
that needed, like,
to be close to other people,
and to share your art
and all of that with the world.
So I refuse to believe
that all of us have evolved
into these fierce queens
where that person inside of us
is completely gone.
- Asia said the competition
shouldn't outweigh sisterhood.
Do you know there's
$100,000 on the line?
Girl, I got enough sisters.
- Let's get this drag off.
- My mindset in the game
has definitely changed.
And it has taken me to a place
that I don't necessarily
like to go to,
but if y'all just wanna compete,
we can just compete.
It's no T.
It's not gonna
work out well in your favor.
- Bon jour.
- Come on, sister.
- We survived The Last Ball.
- It's a new day
in the workroom,
and I just want to get up
and start over again.
Last week, Eureka came for me
way hard in "Untucked."
- What the f*ck
you talking about, bitch?
- This is my problem with you,
is that--
- What? What problem?
- When you're not getting
your way--
- What problem?
So are you.
- Then somebody's
being negative.
- You and Aquaria are in
the same f*cking boat.
The thing about Eureka
is she needs attention.
So instead of giving her
a lot of negative attention,
I'm going to ignore her,
and that's gonna
drive her crazy.
- We all know
I'm just happy to be here.
[all laugh]
[alarm]
- Whoo, girl.
She done already
done have herses.
Hey, queens.
- Hey, Ru.
- Talk is cheap.
But then again,
so is Michelle Visage.
So don't let your mouth
write a check
that your ass cannot cash.
Okur?
- I feel like she made
that very for you.
[all laugh]
- Hello, hello, hello.
- Hi.
- Hello.
[applause]
- Hi, Ru.
- Ladies, now, for generations,
drag queens have been
on the front lines,
fighting for our LGBT rights.
Unfortunately, today,
there are people
still trying
to take those rights away.
But, honey, when it comes to
being a patriotic American,
drag queens will always
be ready and willing to serve.
- Yes.
- Yeah.
- Oh, Pit Crew.
[cheers]
- Yes.
- You boys are packing.
- Oh, my.
- Now for today's
mini challenge,
I want you
to drag up the contents
of these government-issued
duffel bags
and transform yourselves into
an army of fierce drag queens.
And the most gag-worthy
ensemble wins.
On your mark, get set,
march.
[whistle blows]
- ♪ I'm a bad bitch
in an Army fatigue ♪
♪ All you other hos
is outta my league ♪
♪ Y'all look basic,
I ain't gonna say sh*t ♪
- Shut up.
- ♪ Y'all look basic ♪
- I have a lot of friends
who've enlisted before.
- Vixen, you said
you had a lot of friends.
I don't believe that.
- Ooh.
- Time's up, ladies.
Time's up.
- Roll call.
This is First Lieutenant
Asia from Dallas, Texas,
reporting for duty.
She enlisted in the drag army
to defend her country
in the w*r against bad built
queens with no hip pads.
This is Agent Aquaria
reporting for duty.
She specialized in water t*rture
and any other type
of t*rture officially.
- This is petite officer Monet.
She earned her stripes
during Operation Trippin' Balls,
where she risked
her left silicone titty
to save Honey Mahogany
from herself.
- Petty Officer Eureka
enlisted in the drag army
to defend plus-size individuals
with an active libido.
Her favorite quote,
"I only regret
that I have one fat ass to
give to my country officially."
Major Mayhem specialized
in setting up booby traps.
Captain cr*cker
reporting for duty.
While training, she specialized
in white girl twerkin'.
This is Commander Mo-Mo.
Her favorite thing about
being a fierce drag soldier
is her b*at-ma, body-ody-ody,
and a flat tuck.
Commander Big g*ns Blair.
She enlisted in the drag army to
defend twink slayers everywhere.
While training, she specialized
in stealing hearts.
Private Vixen enlisted
in the drag army
to defend resting bitch faces
and wide awake bitch faces.
When she's on leave,
she spends her time
snatching wigs, rolling
her eyes, and cashing checks.
Commander Kameron Michaels.
She earned her stripes
during Operation Booty Blaster.
- Yeah.
- Where she risked
her right index finger
to save prostates everywhere.
God bless America.
Mission accomplished, queens.
The winner of today's
mini challenge is...
[drum roll]
The Vixen.
[applause]
- Con-drag-ulations.
- Thank you.
Now, back in the day,
I appeared on a classic episode
of a talk show
called "Geraldo,"
and Baby Ru stole the show.
- Yeah.
- Yes.
- Now, for this week's
maxi challenge,
you'll be appearing
as crazy-ass guests
on the brand new daytime
talk show, Bossy Rossy.
[cheers and applause]
#DragRace
Ladies, this is your chance
to show off
your improv comedy chops.
Now, you'll be working in pairs.
The Vixen, because you won
the mini challenge,
you will choose
your own partner,
and also pair up
all the other girls.
- Oh, f*ck.
- sh*t.
- Vixen, pick your partner.
- I choose Asia O'Hara.
- Gladly.
- Let's do Blair and Monique.
Lovely.
Monet and Kameron.
Come over here.
Let's see.
cr*cker and Mayhem.
Lovely.
And I guess that leaves
Eureka and Aquaria.
- Ooh.
- Now, Monet and Kameron,
you'll be appearing in
My Freaky Addiction
Is Ruining My Life.
[both chuckle]
- The Vixen and Asia O'Hara,
you'll be in Why Are
You So Obsessed With Me?
[both laugh]
- Blair and Monique,
you'll be in I Married A Cactus.
Aquaria and Eureka,
you'll be in
Look At Me! I'm A Sexy Baby!
- Oh!
- Last but not least,
Miz cr*cker and Mayhem,
you'll be in Save Me From
My Deadly Fear Of Pickles.
[all laugh]
- Now in a moment,
you'll head over
to the set of Bossy Rossy.
And tomorrow, on the main stage,
we'll be joined by our
extra special guest judges
from the hit show "Claws,"
the brilliant Carrie Preston
will be here.
[cheers and applause]
- And the queen of country pop,
Shania Twain will be here.
[cheers and applause]
- I am freaking out.
This is my childhood idol.
I used to run around
singing Shania Twain songs.
I'm obsessed with her.
- Gentlemen, start your engines,
and may the best woman win.
- Whoo!
- Okay, let's see what we got.
Let me go get another--
- Here, I got one right here.
You take this.
- Look at you.
- I stay ready.
- So you don't have to...
get ready.
- Get ready.
- Vixen has chosen me
as her partner,
and this can go one of two ways.
It could be fabulous because
she's won two mini challenges
and a maxi challenge thus far.
Or it could go very sour
because when
she doesn't get her way
she becomes very venomous.
- What did you think about
how I split up the teams?
- I was surprised, because
it's a very interesting mix,
which I think is going
to work out good for everybody.
- I didn't try to f*ck
nobody over except those two.
- Girl.
- [laughs]
- You dirty bitch.
You are so mean.
- They're gonna
f*ck each other up,
because Aquaria is always
trying to get a joke in,
but it never lands.
Eureka is always trying
to get something in,
and she hates when
somebody interrupts her.
- You definitely
can't wear that.
- Why?
- It's too "Little House
on the Prairie."
- I wouldn't wish Eureka
or Aquaria on anybody.
They're both two big babies,
so I hope they suffer.
- For our maxi challenge,
we're gonna be special guests
on the Bossy Rossy Show.
So we have to come up with
characters, their backstory,
get our looks together,
and we have to perform
an improv moment with Ross
in front of a live audience.
- First queen
is I have a copycat
and then the second queen is
I'm obsessed
with the other queen.
- Mm-hmm.
So I'm total victim.
- Mm-hmm.
- Whiney and upset.
Mm, familiar.
- Okay, so I am...totally
copies everything that you do,
but is in denial.
Claims it was her idea first,
even though it's obvious
she's a copycat.
So basically, you're Aquaria
and I'm Miz cr*cker.
- House down boots.
I'm just glad you said it first.
We could be really,
really shady,
and just be them, for real.
You know what I mean?
- We're both from New York?
- Yeah.
- Ah, bitch.
- It's big.
- Oh, my God.
That's gonna get us b*at up.
- Hi, I'm from--
Who will fight me?
Who will fight me?
Have a backstory, bitch.
- They wrote it for us.
- This is so good.
- Oh, my God.
- Oh, my God.
- Of course, The Vixen,
anything that has
a sliver of shade in it,
she is on board.
And it's got Aquaria in it,
she's on cloud nine.
- We are going to have so many
enemies, it's unfortunate.
- I will walk up like, yeah,
yeah, yeah, you ready?
W-w-w-what's up, Ross, baby?
How you doing?
For me
in this week's challenge,
I want to redeem myself
from being in the bottom two.
But the Vixen
matches me up with Kameron,
and I'm like...
- I can talk about...
Mm.
- It is a talk show scene,
and he just doesn't talk.
- I can talk about like
Trinity's like YouTube video.
- Mm-hmm.
- Be like, she threw me
in the garbage
and I'm walking--I don't know.
It's not really that funny.
- She may have been homeschooled
or something. I don't know.
- I was thinking
maybe I could be
the person
who is scared of pickles.
- Okay. Good.
That's really good,
because I am seeing
a pickle costume over here,
and I really wanna wear
that costume.
- Oh, my God.
- [laughs]
My friends at home tell me
that there's nothing
I can do like stupid.
So as soon as I see
our jar of pickles is kosher,
I realize..
[Jewish accent]
Dr. Dill is Jewish.
- Is there a prop that you want?
- A funny prop I want?
- I feel like even
in the last couple challenges,
Mayhem is not being shining
to the best of her ability.
And I worry about that with her,
because she's had problems
throwing her personality out
in tense situations.
So I'm hoping
she can push through.
- I definitely wanna be like
that wholesome good housewife--
- That can't say--
- That can talk a little dirty.
- A little dirty.
- Like when she's talking,
talking,
and she gets carried away
because she's just like,
she has to like pull it back,
you know.
- Pull it back.
- So it's like,
oh, I can't show that,
but deep down,
I'm a dirty bitch.
- I'm feeling confident, honey,
because this is what
Mother Darling does.
Give me a mike, America.
She will work.
I think we also
should have a safe word.
So if you feel like
I'm doing too much,
I would like
if you threw out a word.
- What's a word that
would work well with this?
- Um...
- That's a really good idea.
- Vanjie.
- [laughs]
That's the safe word.
Vanjie.
- [laughs]
- See, if you're like this
on set,
we're gonna be unstoppable.
- Very bad, okay.
- Monet.
- Yeah.
- Step into my office over here,
'cause I have
a couple questions for you.
- Oh, Lord.
- Oh.
Girl.
I am living
for the drama already.
[laughs]
That is everything.
I'm so into that.
- Vixen was the one who stirred
the whole sh*t up.
That bitch has some balls,
and I f*cking live for it.
- Bossy Rossy!
- That's right.
It's Bossy Rossy time.
- Oh, you have
Rossed the line with me.
You're not the boss,
I'm the boss!
[laughs]
[cheers and applause]
- Oh, now, welcome
to the program.
You know, love is blind,
but it can still hurt.
Let's meet a queen
who fell in love
and married a cactus.
Please welcome Blair.
[cheers and applause]
- Blair brought her husband.
- Thank you. This is Lloyd.
- Hello, Lloyd.
- He doesn't talk much.
- Okay. Now, how did you
and your husband meet?
- We actually met in the
Ru Garden Ridge Country Club.
It was basically
love at first sight.
Actually more like love
at first prick,
if you know what I mean.
- Well, Blair...
I have
some bad news for you.
Your husband has been cheating
on you behind your back.
- What?
- Oh!
- I mean,
what cactus could resist?
[audience boos]
- Please meet the other woman,
Monique Heart.
Get out here.
[cheers and applause]
- I'm his wife.
Who are you?
- Um, his fiancé.
- Excuse me? Fiancé, what?
- The ring.
- This is the ring.
- Mine's is bigger.
[audience laughs]
Look, you little bitch.
Don't make me cut you.
- Cut me all you want,
but I'll make sure
he pricks you good.
- Bitch, he has pricked me.
- Pricks you in the worst way,
because he's pricked me
the best.
- Bitch, he was with me
last night.
- Oh!
- Lloyd, you got
some 'splaining to do.
- You really do.
Now let's get to your ass.
Excuse me, thank you.
Babe, you over here
with cr*cker Jack
looking like
"Little House on the Prairie,"
and you got
all of this right here.
Oh, you picked...
[stutters] nothing?
Nothing.
- I got your ass.
Just wait.
- Blair was sweet and cute,
but the second Monique came out,
all I wanted to do
was have a front-row seat
to the Monique Show.
Blair, what do you
have to say to Monique?
- Look me up and down
one more time, girl.
I'm just gonna let you know.
Look me up and down--
- Oh, I've looked many times,
and you're very ungodly.
- Bitch.
- Oh!
- Oh!
- Now I try to keep the Lord
in this bitch,
but I'm about to throw him out.
- Oh.
- Vanjie.
- I'm like, dear Lord,
keep going, girl,
just keep going.
- Vanjie.
- You might--
Vanjie?
- Vanjie.
- Vanjie!
- Vanjie!
- Bitch.
- Bitch!
[cheers and applause]
[audience chanting]
Vanjie! Vanjie!
When we flipped that safe word
and put it into our skit,
and we go, Vanjie!
It worked.
Ross loved it.
The crowd loved it,
and I said, ah, brilliant.
I'm brilliant.
Bye, America.
[cheers and applause]
- You know, I always say it.
We are all as sick
as our secrets,
and nobody knows that better
than our next guest,
a sick queen who is addicted
to eating her own hip pads.
Ugh.
- Eew.
- Right?
Gross.
Give a big Bossy Rossy welcome
to Monet X Change.
[cheers and applause]
- How are you?
- I'm fine, thanks for asking.
- Well, you know, I am
the new CEO of cakes for Queens.
You know, cakes for queens,
you know what I'm saying?
But now we started
baking cakes for queens,
so I brought you a cake
for a queen.
- Oh, you--
- Now, I got a little hungry
on the way,
so I had a little snack.
- So when did you first discover
that you loved
eating your own hip pads?
- I had to drop off
a shipment
for my good girl,
Latrice Royale,
and, you know, I stopped by.
I brought her her cake for--
because she's a queen.
And then I got
a little whiff of it.
[sniffs]
Oh, mm.
When I travel,
I make sure I stuff some
in my dress just in case.
- Oh, you--
- You know what I'm saying?
- You're eating some right now.
- Yeah, I have it everywhere.
It's so good.
- Well, I think we can all agree
this is a pretty
freaky addiction.
But when it comes to freaky
addictions, you are not alone.
- Oh!
- Please meet a queen
who's addicted to huffing
tucking panties.
- [sniffing]
- Please welcome
Kameron Michaels.
[cheers and applause]
- Hey, y'all.
- Hi, Ross.
- Hi, darling. Hello.
- Mwah, mwah.
Hello, baby.
I just wanna say, we're gonna
get through it together.
- No, we're not.
You're nasty.
- She already
catching an attitude.
I know we just met,
but I'm gonna get
a little closer to you
because...mm-mm.
- Darling.
- Nope.
- Darling.
- I can't do it.
My mama taught me
better than that.
- Monet is a comedy queen,
so I know that
I have to work harder
so that I'm not outshined.
- How many times a day
do you huff a tucking panty?
- About 127 times.
- What--
- I'm sorry, Ross.
Y'all making me nervous.
Oh! Oh!
Oh, that's good.
- Oh, I can smell that
from here.
- Oh!
- I can smell it from here.
- I'm sorry,
I have to do one more.
Oh!
Oh, that's good.
- That is not good.
That is nasty.
- Blblblblbl.
- Monet, what do you think
of Kameron's secret addiction?
- She's gonna judge me, y'all.
- You know what?
Honestly, I think
that it is disgusting.
- Oh!
- It's nasty.
- There's only one solution.
I'm going to handcuff
you two together,
and you'll be sober companions
for a month.
- Ooh.
- Stand up.
Let's do it.
Come here.
Give me your hand.
Here they are.
They are handcuffed together.
Now get out of here.
[cheers and applause]
- Monet,
she was a little...slow,
but Kameron sold it throughout.
[cheers and applause]
Our next guest,
get this,
she is deathly afraid
of pickles.
Please welcome Mayhem.
Yeah.
[cheers and applause]
- Oh!
Welcome to the program.
- Oh, my God.
I can not believe
I'm here on Bossy Rossy.
- Yes.
[cheers and applause]
Now you do not like pickles?
- Oh, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no.
Oh, my God.
- Bossy Rossy to the rescue.
- Oh, my God, oh, my God,
it's happening.
- I've invited an expert
who specializes
in curing pickle phobia.
Please welcome our own Dr. Dill,
Miz cr*cker.
[cheers and applause]
- Hello.
[audience laughs]
- Make it stop, make it stop,
make it stop.
- Okay, now, now, please.
Doctor, welcome to the program.
Thank you for being here.
Dr. Dill, please explain.
What is a pickle phobia
all about?
- Listen,
this isn't about you.
This isn't about me.
This isn't even about
my brand new best-selling book,
"Dill With It, Learning
to Enjoy and Relish Life
by Opening a New Jar of Joy."
- Miz cr*cker sort of like
worried me in the beginning
because I didn't quite get
what she was doing.
- Now what I want you to do
is reach into this box,
and I want you to tell me
what you feel.
- But then she got there.
- There you go.
All right.
What do you feel?
- Oh, it's big.
- Okay. All right.
- And long.
- Okay. All right.
What else do we have?
- Is there a hole
in the bottom of that box?
- Absolutely.
[audience laughs]
- It's a pickle.
- Nope.
Could you reach into here
and tell me what is in the box?
- A banana!
- Okay. I think we're ready
for the breakthrough.
- Are you ready for
the breakthrough?
[cheers and applause]
- I wanna tell you a secret.
- What?
- I'm not just dressed
like a pickle.
I am actually a pickle.
- Oh, my God.
- I am a pickle. Wait.
- What?
- No, you stay right there.
Don't you touch me.
- This is--nobody--
Embrace the way you feel.
- And you never know what's
gonna happen on Bossy Rossy.
Look under your seats,
everybody.
You get a pickle.
You get a pickle.
You get a pickle.
[cheers and applause]
- After me and cr*cker's
performance, I feel good.
I just want to see
what everyone else did
so that I know
if I need to worry or not.
[audience chanting]
- Bossy Rossy. Bossy Rossy.
Bossy Rossy.
- Welcome back.
Imagine your shock
if you found out
that someone had been copying
your every look online
for years.
And no, I'm not talking
about me and Nathan Lane
or me and k.d. lang.
Please give a big Bossy Rossy
welcome to The Vixen.
[cheers and applause]
Now, what is the name
of the queen
who is obsessed with you?
- Oh, I don't know.
It's like Asia or something
stupid like that.
- Asia O'Hara?
- Yeah, that sounds dumb.
- When did Asia O'Hara
start copying you?
- I found out that some girl
was giving away free autographs
in the middle of Times Square.
She's signing my name
and telling people
that I have a pet pig.
- So she's bacon for it.
[audience chuckles]
- That... [laughs].
- [laughs] You okay?
The Vixen was a little wobbly.
Are you ready
to confront your copycat
for the first time
right here on Bossy Rossy?
What do you think?
- I guess.
- Welcome Asia O'Hara.
[cheers and applause]
Oh!
Wow!
You look beautiful.
- Thank you.
- You're wearing my dress!
Don't touch me.
- Asia, is there any truth
to the rumors
that you're copying her look?
- Listen, it's just rumors.
But really,
we're just great friends.
We've been friends
for a long time.
- I don't know her.
- Yes, you do. Stop it.
[whispering]
She follows me on Instagram.
[audience laughs]
- Don't move over there.
Chill out.
- We had this plan where
I scoot over in the chair,
and she scoots over closer.
I'm scooting,
but she's not scooting.
And I'm supposed
to flip my hair,
she's supposed to flip her hair.
And I'm looking at her like
I don't know what
the f*ck she's doing.
- Is there something
you want to say to Asia
now that you are face to face
for the very first time?
- Get your own face.
- Oh!
- It's my face.
I was born with it.
Do you know we share
the same birthday?
- Lies.
- Yes.
She's a year older than me.
- [gasps] Bitch.
- Oh-ho-ho.
- You know what? Fine.
I will be different.
You want to be that way.
Now. Now.
Who are you now?
Huh? Yeah.
Aah!
- I'm getting sick of this.
- No, I'm getting sick of it.
- Aah!
- Aah!
- So the bitch runs off
and I'm like, bitch, wait.
Do I stay here?
Do I wait?
Was I supposed to leave?
Did I miss an instruction?
And I'm like, damn,
we should have rehearsed.
[cheers and applause]
- Ahh.
[applause]
- Nobody puts this baby
in a corner.
A grown-ass queen
who thinks she's
the sexiest baby in the world.
Please welcome Aquaria.
[cheers and applause]
- Welcome to the program,
Aquaria.
[baby talk]
- Hi, Woss.
- Oh, hewwo.
- Hewwo.
- Please have a seat.
- Thank you.
- Okay. When did you start
living as a sexy baby?
- A couple of years ago.
I've recently
come into my sexiness,
I think, as a baby.
Met a man
that I've married actually.
- Oh.
- And believe it or not,
I can still find love as a baby.
[cheers and applause]
- You think
that you are the number one
sexiest grown-ass baby
in the world?
- Yeah.
I have to be the sexiest.
- Well, do we have
a surprise for you.
- Oh!
- Oh!
- We have
another grown-ass queen
who thinks she is
the sexiest baby in the world.
Please welcome Eureka.
[cheers and applause]
Oh!
- I've decided to be
completely nude basically,
as an homage to body positivity.
I'm shaped like a fat baby
already,
so why not give them
like legit fat sexy baby?
- Welcome to the program,
Eureka.
- Oh. I'm so happy to be here,
I could just die.
- Now, what did you do
before you realized
you were a sexy baby?
- I was actually in
a very healthy relationship.
Well, at least something
that I thought was healthy.
But he left me because
he thought I acted like a baby.
And then left me for a baby.
So, baby, I turned into
the biggest, baddest,
sexiest baby to show him, okay?
[cheers and applause]
Yes.
- Eureka, Aquaria thinks
that she is the sexiest baby
in the world.
- Ross, baby,
I think she's wrong.
- Oh, honey,
no, that's not true.
I look like Linda Evangelista.
I'm a model.
I can walk on this runway
in a diaper
and they would eat me up.
[cheers and applause]
- Ho-ho!
- The thing is,
I have a husband,
and you obviously do not.
- Oh, no, no, that's okay.
I don't need Michael no more.
- Michael?
My Michael?
- Oh, so you're the baby.
Don't you tell me
that you pushes you
in the stroller, baby.
- Oh, honey, I ride all around
the block in my stroller.
- Ooh!
- Ooh!
- Oh, all around the block?
[cries]
- I thought Aquaria did a
pretty good job holding her own.
Unfortunately, she was in
a scene with Hurricane Eureka.
- No, no, no, no, no, no!
- Eureka was like the headliner.
- Oh, God.
- The truth is, there's
only one baby on this set,
and it's me.
Get out of here, kids.
Get out.
Get out of here, babies.
- No!
- Get out of here.
- Me and Aquaria worked
surprisingly well together.
I'm feeling that Vixen
is probably bitter
because she's the one
that paired us together,
and I'm actually working well
with somebody.
Hey, mom.
You'd be proud.
[cheers and applause]
- Don't forget
to tip your bartenders.
- Oh, good morning,
good morning.
- Going into elimination day,
I feel like it's anyone's game.
I don't know how everyone else's
improv went,
so I'm just focusing on,
you know,
really going inside and saying,
I hope someone ruins
the runway for themselves
and makes it clear
who's gonna go home.
How do you feel
your performance went?
- You know, I like doing improv,
and that's like a big part
of what we do in the city, so...
There's always that thing
in your mind,
you're like, yeah,
wah, we're so good.
And then you get in front
of those judges, girl,
and they're like,
Michelle goes, Monet.
And you're like, goddammit,
here we go again, girl.
What other group did you
get to hear about theirs?
Because you know Asia and Vixen
were, they're--did you--
- Vixen, ice cold quiet, right?
- No, but did you hear
what they were going to do?
- Un-huh.
- They were gonna
copy each other
and play off of you and Aquaria.
- Oh, my God.
- Just stop right there.
- Vixen feels very intimidated
that not only
is there one Aquaria
to b*at her out
of the competition,
but there's another one, too.
- I'm just hoping
to be safe this week.
I could not take
being in the bottom again.
- I want to hear
from the judges.
- Careful what you wish for.
- I just feel like I'm not
having the full experience yet.
- Well, I've had
the full experience,
and I don't never
want to be that low again.
- The only thing is, every time
I end up in "Untucked,"
it's some drama,
so I'm like
I would like
to just come to "Untucked"
like, hey, y'all what happened?
Tell me--
- Oh, yeah, you would like
to hear about the drama
as opposed to--
- Yeah, instead of
being the drama.
- Have you and Eureka made up?
- No, I'm ignoring her.
- Vixen.
- Once my beast is out,
it takes a good while
for me to put it back.
- If Eureka and Aquaria
had to lip sync,
which one of them
would you rather see go home?
- Honestly, Eureka.
- Really? Why?
- Because she's so obnoxious.
Like she could be on
the other side of the room
and still in my ear,
you know what I mean?
But I think now she's
kind of taking the message
and like keeping her distance,
which, thank God.
That's all I want
from all of y'all.
- Get the message?
- Just get the message and
let me work in peace, please.
- They finally got the message.
- They finally got it.
Don't poke the bear, goddammit.
I gotta figure out how
to make that a tee shirt.
- Don't poke the bear
has become a popular phrase
in the workroom,
and it is referring
to The Vixen.
If there's any mess,
this ho is ready to fight,
and I'm not gonna be
no part of it.
My teeth were too expensive.
- You are the only reason
I have not changed
my makeup station,
'cause I was about to hit it
on y'all asses.
- What was it that
set you completely off?
- She's like, I'm tired
of hearing you talk.
I'm gonna go smoke.
- Y'all hear me?
- I'm getting tired of
hearing you talk, honestly.
Can I go smoke?
- If you need to go smoke,
just say that.
- Yeah. Thanks.
- You didn't have--
because that was negative.
- Girl, you all
have a retaliation
for everything I say,
and you act like
I be hogging up the talk time.
But then you be doing it, too.
- And I'm like, were you doing
that to get attention?
Is that really how you feel?
Because I feel I have
been really nice to her.
- Well, I felt
like you were angry,
because you was
going completely off.
- What the f*ck
is your problem right now?
Are you serious?
- What's your problem?
- You know what?
You are exactly the girl
that I did not like on Season 9,
and I've been trying
to deal with that.
- You don't know me, girl.
- And see the good in you.
But you know what?
You are another bitch
who doesn't know when
to let somebody else talk.
- Okay.
- Bitch, get your sh*t
together.
I felt att*cked, saying you
tired of hearing me talk.
I don't think I was talking
any more than anybody else.
- I want Eureka and Vixen
to bury the hatchet
because the b*tches
are making my nerves bad.
I can't.
- Hey, girl.
- How are you, girl?
- I'm good, girl.
- You feeling blessed?
- Yes, I just always feel like
I'm about to break
this chair at any moment.
- Okay, so look.
We need to have a moment.
- What moment?
- Because the Shady Corner is
being very shady within itself.
And I would really appreciate it
if you guys
talked out your differences
so we can all get
on the same page again.
- Honestly, at this point,
it's Vixen.
She's the one being bitter
and quiet and tense and weird.
I'm just kind of
giving Vixen her space
so that she can make
her own decisions
on what direction our
friendship's going to go in,
if so at all,
to give her the power
and not try to be controlling,
and et cetera. You know?
- Okay.
- And I assume with her ego
that works--
- Vixen, how do you feel?
- Um, I haven't decided
how I felt yet.
I think I saw...
I wouldn't say
a different side of Eureka,
but I definitely saw the side
that I was trying to avoid.
And so now I've gotta decide
what is actually genuine.
- Well, I understand that.
In my defense, though,
I didn't say anything to
tear you down, but you did me.
- You said you were tired
of listening to me talk.
- Well, I said "y'all."
- No, you said me.
I wouldn't have taken offense
to y'all.
- Okay, well, I can't rewind
to make sure,
but if that's what you heard,
then I believe
that's what I said.
- Now that feels like
the biggest cop-out
I've ever heard in my life.
- No, I mean, I'm saying
I believe that's what I said.
Honestly, the moment
was so much,
by the time it was over,
I was kind of like
what the f*ck
even happened, you know.
Obviously I pissed you off.
- Yeah.
- As intensely as you retaliated
and you mentioning
that you already thought
you wouldn't like me
because of last season.
So when it comes to that,
I mean,
I've had to deal with that from
a lot of people, not just you.
Like my career.
I was literally like...
I mean, I was b*at up by my dad,
people in school,
other football players
that I played sports with,
constantly because
of my personality
and because I was too much
and too flamboyant and too this.
And I silenced myself
for a long time
and got to a really dark place.
So when I found drag,
and I found like my voice again,
and my personality,
and I started to flourish,
it got a little out of hand.
- I can feel
what Eureka's saying
about feeling like
she wasn't heard.
When I started my career,
I didn't feel like I could
speak out or speak up.
There was a long time,
most of my drag career,
I was just trying to show up,
get my money, and leave.
And then I decided that, you
know, with the current climate,
that I needed
to start speaking up.
So I like lean into saying
exactly what the f*ck I think.
Which is why when somebody
pushes--pokes the bear,
that's why it goes
zero to a hundred.
Because it is still new for me,
and I don't know
how to get to 50.
Unfortunately, you know,
my damage next to Eureka's
damage does not mix well.
At this point,
all we can do is move forward.
- I would like that.
I know we're not
at a hugging point,
but we can do
maybe a handshake right now?
- I don't think we need
physical confirmation.
- No? I mean, just like,
I'm a physical person.
- I don't wanna like
put a bow on it
because I, you know,
still have my reservations.
But, I mean, for now
we can at least get along
and keep moving forward.
- That's all I need, honestly.
Well, just know
that my friendship's here.
- Okay.
- You know, so...
Whatever direction that goes in.
- Quick, somebody
change the subject.
I'm tired of this mushy sh*t.
- We supposed to sit here
and talk sh*t
about everybody else.
[RuPaul laughs]
- ♪ Cover girl, put the bass
in your walk ♪
♪ Head to toe,
let your whole body talk ♪
[applause]
- Welcome to the main stage
of "RuPaul's Drag Race."
The white Oprah,
Michelle Visage.
- And you get some boobs,
and you get some boobs,
and you get some boobs.
- The other white Oprah,
Carson Kressley.
- Oh, no, no,
I'm the other white meat.
- Oink, oink.
[all laugh]
- The brilliant Carrie Preston.
Did you come
with your "Claws" out?
- Oh, girl, just trying
to nail it like you do.
- [laughs]
And she's "Still The One,"
Shania Twain.
Girl I love
your latest album, "Now."
In fact, judges,
look under your chairs.
- Oh, wow.
- Now, now, now.
- Thank you.
- This week,
we challenged our queens
to improvise their way through
a trashy talk show challenge.
And tonight, they're
strutting their stuff
in denim and diamonds.
Let's go, girls.
Gentlemen, start your engines,
and may the best woman win.
- ♪ I want you to remember me ♪
- ♪ Snap sh*t ♪
- First up, Monet X Change.
That's quite some chap-shtick.
[all laugh]
- I'm giving you rhinestones
from the collar of my shirt
down to my toes.
I'm giving you the essence
of denim and diamonds realness.
She look good.
- This is the new
ass-less onesie line.
[all laugh]
- Chambray, you stay.
Kameron Michaels.
- Ooh, someone's cups
runneth over.
- Oh, my, now look at them
smokey mountains.
[all laugh]
- I am serving you
young Dolly Parton,
big boobs, blonde hair,
country realness.
I'm from Nashville,
and I used to country line dance
when I was little, so this
is kind of part of my childhood.
- She's a jean-ius.
[all laugh]
- The Vixen.
- This is the very rare
denim mermaid.
[all laugh]
- La-Tanya Tucker.
[all laugh]
- I'm showing the judges
something new today.
It is a cowgirl-inspired
mermaid dress.
I am making sure
that they get a look
at every stone on this dress,
because there are a lot.
- Y'all, do these diamonds
make my ass look fat?
[all laugh]
- Asia O'Hara.
- She's on the fringe
of brilliance.
- Even cowgirls
get the blue jeans.
- This is my Tina Turner
Thunderdome
post-apocalyptic shredded denim
that has been through
some things,
because I've been fighting
b*tches in the coat.
- I don't know if this look
can be salvaged.
[all laugh]
- Aquaria.
- You betta patchwork.
- Oh, look at that
beautiful fan.
You know, country fans are the
most loyal fans in the world.
- They are.
- Honey, my look on the runway
is inspired
by denim and diamonds
meets glitter and grease.
This look has me saying
de-nim, she's hot.
- Now hat's entertainment.
[all laugh]
- Eureka.
- Elvis is still alive.
- Oh.
- I'm giving you
grown-ass Honey Boo Boo
done ate the rest of the family
in my Elvis-inspired eleganza.
I am a rhinestone cowgal,
honey.
- Now, she calls this
a one piece and a biscuit.
[all laugh]
- Well, I declare,
Blair St. Clair.
It's little Suzanne Sugarbaker.
[all laugh]
- Aw.
- Diamonds
are a boob's best friend.
- They are.
- Yes.
- This outfit is made of
15 different pairs of jeans
that have been ripped
and shredded apart
into different patches.
I love this look
because it is encompassed
in hair and in diamonds.
I'm like the power country
kind of girl.
- Well, if you can't
b*at 'em, denim.
[all laugh]
- Monique Heart.
Well, howdy.
It's Niecy Nashville.
[all laugh]
- I've stoned my life away.
Those chaps are stoned for
the gods, mother darling.
Big stones, little stones,
just stones.
#girlshesstoned
- Nothing says class
like a great set of ass.
[all laugh]
- Mayhem Miller.
- Pinky tuck-a-dare-ho.
[all laugh]
- I am serving an homage
to the Grand Ole Opry.
I'm giving you
cocoa country Barbie
looking like a good
old fashioned cowgirl,
ready to ride off
into the sunset.
- I wonder who's bed
her boots have been under.
- Everybody's,
by the looks of it.
[all laugh]
- Miz cr*cker.
- I could sure go
for a hamburger right now.
[all laugh]
- Only Miz cr*cker
can serve model and moron
on the same runway.
[all laugh]
Of all the looks
I've done in the competition,
this one shows me in my fullest.
My love of beauty,
booty, and comedy.
- How much wood
would a woodchuck tuck?
- If a woodchuck
could tuck wood?
[all laugh]
- Welcome, ladies.
Based on
your improv performances
and your denim and diamond
presentations,
I've made some decisions.
Now when I call your name,
please step forward.
Asia O'Hara.
Blair St. Clair.
Kameron Michaels.
Aquaria.
Ladies, you are all safe.
- Kameron Michaels,
is there anything
you'd like to say
to Shania Twain?
- You were my idol
when I was younger.
I used to run around the house
and lip sync and lip sync
and lip sync,
and you are probably
one of the reasons
that I am here today
as a drag queen.
- Well, thank you.
The pleasure is mine.
- Look what you did, Shania.
[all laugh]
- Thank you.
- All right.
You may leave the stage.
- Ladies, it's time
for the judge's critiques.
Let's start with Monet X Change.
- Tonight on the runway,
it's a little bit of a miss.
I think the idea
of the ass-less onesie is cute,
but I think
it's a little ill-fitting
because what happens
around the crotch is it gaps.
That's a hard thing
with a jumpsuit.
You always have something
going on down here.
- I have a lot going on
down there.
- Girl, me, too. Same.
[all laugh]
And then Bossy Rossy.
You came out with a cake,
and my head
right away went, oh,
angel food cake
looks like padding.
I was thinking, oh, she's
coming out with hip pad pie.
And instead,
it kind of went nowhere.
- I wanted you to be jonesing
for those hip pads.
- You have to be over the top
and insane
with this kind of comedy.
And just kind of like er-er-er.
It just fizzled out for me.
- Up next, The Vixen.
- I love this look.
It's gorgeous.
I think it is well constructed.
- It's enviable.
I mean, it's glamorous
and elegant.
- But you've got
no waist cincher,
no waist anything on, do you?
- No.
- Imagine that thing
just sucked all the way in.
Because it's got
a mermaid flair,
it would have gone
like this. Wazoo.
And your performance
in Bossy Rossy,
you only played one note.
Whining, complaining, yelling.
No! It gets kind of like,
okay, we've seen this already.
- Me and Asia came up with
a lot of different cues,
and I'm not gonna throw her
under the bus at all,
but I will say a lot of the cues
came from me,
and she didn't pick up
on all of them.
- Thank you, Vixen.
Up next, Eureka.
- I'm enjoying
this Kentucky Couture.
I love even your makeup,
those clumpy lower lashes
giving me kind of KISS glamour.
- And then the improv,
oh, my gosh.
You were a big baby.
And I thought
you were amazing.
- And I love
that you didn't pad.
I love that
you just came out as you.
And you had no hair,
so you're giving us
a little Pepper from
"American Horror Story."
[all laugh]
With like a bib.
- Like I ate her, girl.
[all laugh]
- You stole the friggin' show.
- Up next, Monique Heart.
She's standing up there
with her hand on her hip.
- Make your backbone slip.
- Oh, girl.
- I love a conflicting pattern.
Tonight it's a full-out w*r.
There is the leg things
with the crystal fringe.
And then we open
the acid-washed shirt,
and there's my giraffe. Yes.
- You said giraffe,
but I got brown cow.
- Girl, no, that's a giraffe.
[all laugh]
Cows ain't spotted like that.
That's a giraffe.
- I saw it and I was like,
oh, brown cow.
Stunning.
[all laugh]
- In the improv, you had some of
your best moments with a cactus.
[all laugh]
- I agree. I thought you
had to act with a real prick.
- Welcome to Hollywood.
[all laugh]
- But it was so strong,
the character was so in it,
I was really proud of you.
- Clearly you've seen a lot
of trashy daytime talk shows.
- I do improv a lot
just hosting,
and I didn't want to dominate
the whole scene,
so I was like let's have
a safe word, which was Vanjie.
- My safe word is Chaka Khan.
[all laugh]
- So Vanjie was your safe word?
- Miss Vanjie.
- [laughs] Don't...don't...
- Miss Vanjie.
- Don't you start with me,
Michelle.
- I'm not gonna do it.
I'm dying to do it.
- Chaka Khan, Chaka Khan,
Chaka Khan.
[all laugh]
Thank you so much.
Up next, Mayhem Miller.
- Do-si-do your partner, girl.
I think you look adorable.
- Is that pink a denim fabric?
- Oh, yes.
- Okay.
It kind of missed the mark
for me,
and I think
I put my fingers on why.
So you're doing
a Toddlers and Tiara.
- Well, when I was thinking
of a look,
I was the chocolate Judd.
- [laughs]
- A chocolate Judd.
- Chocolate Judd.
- It just seems too juvenile.
- Your improv talk show moment,
you created a great character,
and I just wanted you
to go further with it.
You can't be too big.
- It just was overshadowed
by Dr. Dill.
It should be give and take.
That's what makes a scene work.
- Up next, Miz cr*cker.
- I love everything about this,
from the makeup,
the color choice,
really quality details.
- Now, Dr. Dill.
- Dill with it.
- That was exceptional.
Everything about it
was dumbly brilliant
and what I've personally
come to expect from you.
- I mean, Miz cr*cker
picked a peck of pickled puns.
You really armed yourself
with a lot of really funny puns.
- Had you done improv before?
- I've lied
to my boyfriends before.
[all laugh]
Never on stage.
- Please don't ever stop doing
those fun, quirky, weird things
because that's what
we love about you.
- Thank you, ladies.
I think we've heard enough.
While you untuck backstage,
the judges and I
will deliberate.
So just be-Twain us girls.
[all laugh]
What do you think?
Starting with Monet X Change.
- All right, who doesn't love
a bottomless onesie?
Oh, I don't.
[all laugh]
I didn't love this look.
When she came out on the runway,
I was just like, no,
this is a big miss.
- I'm starting to get concerned
that Monet X Change
is hitting a wall.
- She thought she was gonna
wing it with her personality,
which is charming and all that,
but it wasn't enough.
The Vixen.
- It was different.
It wasn't the same old
chaps and fringe.
- I just loved the contrast
of the denim with the glamour.
- That outfit
gave her more shape.
And had she cinched it,
it would have pushed it
way over the edge.
- In the improv,
she didn't really give herself
anywhere to go.
- All it did was get louder.
- Mm-hmm.
- Eureka.
- For me, this is what
great drag is about.
It's detailed.
It's cohesive.
And when it has a sense of humor
layered on top of it,
that is just the cherry
on top of the sundae.
- And then out comes big baby
and just stole the show.
And then ultimately landed on
the floor in a temper tantrum.
It was my favorite moment
of the entire night.
- Oh, I totally agree,
and I think just
that confidence came out
very obviously on both
the runway and the improv.
- Monique Heart.
- Tonight on the runway,
whilst I do give her credit
for going for it,
I have no idea
what she went for.
[all laugh]
- Or what the animal print was.
- I think we've agreed
that it's a long-necked cow.
[all laugh]
- You know, I thought
her improv moments were great.
She owned that scene.
She even was grabbing the cactus
and moving it over to her.
She was yelling at her man.
- And who hasn't had that
conversation with a prick?
- Right.
- Amen.
- Mayhem Miller.
- I love the idea
of the chocolate Judd,
but you shouldn't have
to explain your outfit.
Mayhem to me is kind of coasting
right now, you guys.
She literally got full lunar
and solar eclipsed by cr*cker.
- She didn't connect
with Dr. Dill very well.
- She was a little bit maybe
more grossed out by pickles
than terrified of pickles.
- Right, because if she was
playing like the full-on fear,
then she would need this doctor
to cure her of this.
- Right.
- Yes.
Miz cr*cker, Dr. Dill.
- cr*cker was hilarious because
it was so ridiculous and absurd.
- I am actually a pickle.
- Oh!
- That it was funny.
- That should be
a real character.
- Yeah, she is smart
and she's funny.
And then the denim and diamonds
look was perfect.
I just wish
she had a larger belt.
Maybe a cucumber bun.
[all laugh]
[clap, clap]
- Silence.
I have made my decision.
Bring back my...pickles.
- Welcome back, ladies.
I've made some decisions.
Miz cr*cker,
you are safe.
- Thank you, Ru.
- Eureka,
for the first time
in "Drag Race" herstory,
I'm going to say...
con-drag-ulations, baby,
you are the winner
of this week's challenge.
[applause]
- Whoo!
- You've won two tickets
to Cirque Du Soleil's
sexy adult cabaret Zumanity,
plus airfare and deluxe
Las Vegas accommodations.
- Thank you so much.
[cheers and applause]
It's a full-circle moment
for me right now,
because last season
on week five,
I was sent home
because of my injury.
And now this season on week
five, I won my first challenge.
- Monique Heart.
You're safe.
- Monet X Change,
your hip pad addiction
left us jonesing for more.
Mayhem Miller,
your pickled panic portrayal
peaked prematurely.
The Vixen, your copycat improv
lacked originality.
The Vixen,
you're safe.
- Thank you so much.
- Monet, Mayhem,
I'm sorry, my dears,
but you are up for elimination.
- For me to be in the bottom two
a second week in a row,
it is so disheartening.
It feels like Ru
has wasted a ticket here
to "RuPaul's Drag Race,"
and I should not be here.
- Two queens stand before me.
Prior to tonight,
you were asked to prepare
a lip sync performance
of "Man, I Feel Like
A Woman" by Shania Twain.
Ladies, this is your last chance
to impress me
and save yourself
from elimination.
- The time has come...
[thunder]
for you to lip sync...
[echoing] for your life.
Good luck,
and don't f*ck it up.
[music plays]
- Let's go, girls.
Come on.
- Whoo! Yeah!
- ♪ I'm going out tonight,
I'm feelin' all right ♪
♪ Gonna let it all hang out ♪
♪ Wanna make some noise,
really raise my voice ♪
♪ Yeah, I want to
scream and shout ♪
♪ The best thing
about being a woman ♪
♪ Is the prerogative
to have a little fun and ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Go totally crazy,
forget I'm a lady ♪
♪ Men's shirts, short skirts ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Get in the action,
feel the attraction ♪
♪ Color my hair,
do what I dare ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ I want to be free, yeah,
to feel the way I feel ♪
♪ Man, I feel like a woman ♪
♪ Uh-huh ♪
♪ The best thing
about being a woman ♪
♪ Is the prerogative
to have a little fun ♪
♪ Fun, fun ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Go totally crazy,
forget I'm a lady ♪
♪ Men's shirts, short skirts ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ I want to be free, yeah,
to feel the way I feel ♪
♪ The way I feel ♪
♪ Man, I feel like a woman ♪
Hoo!
♪ I feel like a woman ♪
[cheers and applause]
- Ladies, I've made my decision.
- Monet X Change,
shantay you stay.
- Thank you.
- You may join the other girls.
Mayhem, now the world
knows it's Miller Time.
- Thank you for believing in me
and seeing something special,
even when I didn't think
I had anything left in me.
- Thank you.
Now sashay away.
[applause]
- You are all beautiful.
Don't you let nobody
ever tell you different.
Do I believe I have
a lot more to give
to the competition than others?
Abso-f*cking-lutely.
But it's okay,
because I got here,
something that I never thought
would ever happen.
Bitch, I did it.
I may have not won,
but my dream came true.
- Con-drag-ulations, queens.
Remember, if you can't love
yourself,
how in the hell are you
gonna love somebody else?
Can I get an amen up in here?
- Amen.
- All right.
Now let the music play.
- ♪ To-to-to to the moon ♪
♪ To the moon ♪
♪ Come on and take me away ♪
♪ To-to-to to the moon ♪
10x05 - The Bossy Rossy Show
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RuPaul plays the role of host, mentor, and head judge for this series, as contestants are given different challenges each week.
RuPaul plays the role of host, mentor, and head judge for this series, as contestants are given different challenges each week.