03x08 - Final Destination

[bunniefuu]

[CACKLES]

Previously on f*cking "Chucky"...

There's something very,
very wrong in this house.

I served you up a
smorgasbord of sacrifices.

You get one more chance.

We have to move now.

- Hello?
- What about my friends?

We'll find a way to help
them once we get out.

Grant! Grant, no.

My execution is tonight.

Get me something of his.

- [GRUNTS]
- And get it fast.

Chucky's violent because
he loves v*olence.

You can't appeal to his better nature.

Good Chucky, remember?

Last year, we brainwashed him.

Want to play?

Join hands.

- [GASPING]
- Charles, are you here?

Where is Caroline?

BOTH: Caroline?

Where is she?

My name is f*cking Chucky!

- [CACKLING]
- Don't break the circle!

[DRAMATIC MUSIC]

Your only chance now is to take
him by surprise on his own turf.

Once I find Good Chucky,

I have to talk him into
sacrificing himself?

Exactly.

How are you gonna temporarily die?

This drug stops all cardiac
activity for five minutes.

- This is crazy.
- We're the heroes.

Does anyone want to say anything?

Oh, you are going to burn in hell.

- Any last words?
- Are you ready?

Goodbye, Chucky.

I love you so much.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]

♪ ♪

[g*n COCKS]

[g*nsh*t]

[CROWD SCREAMING]

[CLATTERING]

[SCREAMING]

[g*nshots]

No! No!

♪ ♪

[GASPING]

- [GRUNTS]
- No!

[GASPING] k*ll him!

- Sorry, Father.
- [g*nsh*t]

[SCREAMING] No!

Eli, what took you so long?

Sorry, Miss Tilly.

I just heard about Erica
when I came on duty.

Let's get you out of here.

Tiffany!

Tiffany, you bitch!

Bye-bye, Nica, I'll see you later.

No! No!

Get the f*ck out of
my way! Get the f*ck...

♪ ♪

[g*nshots]

[SCREAMING]

[g*nshots]

[ALL YELLING AND CHEERING]

♪ ♪

Thank you for staying
with us, Miss Tilly.

- Thank you.
- Have a nice night.

Do it.

Bye, Miss Tilly!

[ALARMS BUZZING]

[EXCITED CHATTER]

[ALL CHEERING]

♪ ♪

[ALL GRUNTING]

[g*nshots]

This is gonna be the
longest five minutes

of my life.



Is he really dead?

Medically, if not legally.
The drug's stopped his heart.

In all our trials, brain
damage didn't set in

until, conservatively, 6 minutes, 6:15,

but we've never tried this
on anyone this young before.

What does that mean?

This could be interesting.

f*ck that. I'm bringing him back.

Devon. Devon, give him a chance.

He'll be okay for five minutes.

How do you know?

We've done experiments
with these dr*gs too.

Time expands on the other side.


be like 15 for Jake.

Enough time, hopefully,
for him to find Chucky.

What if Chucky finds him first?

Devon, it won't just be
Chucky looking for Jake.

What do you mean?

It's not just the agony of the people

Chucky k*lled here that I'm feeling.

I can also feel others.

You mean like ghosts
from somewhere else?

- Who d*ed somewhere else?
- Yes.

Now the White House has
become a kind of magnet

for the dead, drawn here by Jake.

You've been there, haven't you?

- To the other side?
- Once.

For how long?

Seven minutes.

Well, that explains so much.

What happened? What did you see?

I'd rather not talk about it.

Jesus f*cking Christ,
I just want to know

what's happening to Jake.

It's different for
everyone who crosses over.

But one thing's for sure,
he's gonna have to be strong

and brave.

That's not gonna be a problem.

[TENSE MUSIC]

♪ ♪

Time?

Four minutes.

He's so cold.

[EERIE TONES]

[MUFFLED WHISPERING]

[SHATTERING]

[EERIE MUSIC]

♪ ♪

Dad?

What the hell are you doing here?

[PLAYFUL SPOOKY MUSIC]

♪ ♪

Oh, my God.

I saw you die.

Yeah.

I was there.

Dad, I'm so sorry.

Do you have any idea how it
feels to get electrocuted?

Can you even begin to imagine the agony?

It wasn't me, Dad. I didn't do it.

But you wanted to.

No.

You wanted me dead. You
thought about it every day.

Admit it.

Only after you started hitting me.

I was your father, Jake.

It was my responsibility to correct you

when you deserve it.

I deserved it?

Just 'cause I'm gay?

[GRUNTS]

[TENSE MUSIC]

You embarrassed me, Jake.

You made me ashamed.

You made me ashamed of myself!

And you know, it all stopped

when I met Devon.

Who the f*ck is Devon?

He's my boyfriend, Dad.

Come here, Jake.

Come here and take your
punishment like a man, Jake.

Jake!

[VOICE ECHOING] Jake!

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]

♪ ♪

[LAUGHTER]

[EERIE WALTZ MUSIC]

♪ ♪

[LAUGHTER]

Jake!

[GASPS]

You don't actually think
you can win, do you?

You can't think for one second

you can b*at... him.

You're not the hero, Jake.

You're not a man.

You're weak.

And you're gonna fail.

You never believed in me.

That's not true.

I remember a time I
thought you were going to be

the President of the
United States of America.

You were so smart.

Way smarter than me.

Truth is, I was so proud.

But then your mother d*ed and...

You started drinking.

Don't mind if I do.

[TENSE MUSIC]

♪ ♪

Don't.

Dad. Dad, stop.

[SIGHS]

This is the only thing
that kept me sane.

It's the only thing that made
living in that house bearable.

This made everything make sense!

♪ ♪

I forgive you! [VOICE ECHOING]

What did you say?

I forgive you.

I know you were going through a lot.

Shut your mouth, Jake.

I know things have been hard for you.

Don't.

I know you were doing
the best you could.

I said stop.

And I know you love me.

[SOMBER MUSIC]

♪ ♪

And I love you too, Dad.

♪ ♪

[BAT CLATTERS]

- Dad, I have to go.
- I know.

I have to tell you something, though.

You're still gonna fail.

[UNSETTLING MUSIC]

[WHISPERING] He's much
more dangerous here.

♪ ♪

You better wish me luck, then.

Good luck.

You're gonna need it.

♪ ♪

[DOORS SLAM]

Hey.

Hey!

[EERIE MUSIC]

♪ ♪

I'm no critic, but I gotta say,

unlike your assh*le father,
I always liked your stuff.

Thank you.

Where's Caroline?

Where do you think?

Is she dead, Chucky?

Is she in here with us?

You know, you got guts,
kid. I'll give you that.

Not only to go against me

but to say "f*ck off"
to the world's judgments,

live your life,

and be yourself.

Just like me.

Just like you?

Yeah.

[FLESH SQUELCHES]

Oh, ouch.

Where is she, Chucky?

[LAUGHS]

You can't k*ll me, you idiot.

I'm already dead.

- Just like you.
- [GASPS]

The truth is, everybody lives

on one side of the Kn*fe or the other.

It's just that my side is way more fun.

So which side do you
want to be on, Jake?

I don't have time for this.

Well, I guess we're both gonna have

to find another way to get what we want.

What do you want?

Follow me.

♪ ♪

Three minutes.

[CHUCKYS CACKLING]

Come on in.

I saved a seat for you.

You're gonna love this.

Just sit down,

enjoy the show, and relax.

[CACKLES]

[SPEAKING LATIN]

Welcome to the dollhouse, baby!

[CHUCKYS CACKLING]

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]

♪ ♪

Please! Please! Please!

[ALL CACKLING]

[GRUNTING]

Oh! [LAUGHS]

[WHIMPERING]

Oh, no!

[CHUCKYS CACKLING]

♪ ♪

[SINISTER MUSIC]

[RETCHES]

[CHUCKYS CACKLING AND CHATTERING]

♪ ♪

Do you remember that?

Look how scared you were.

f*ck you.

[LAUGHS]

You know, you've been
scared your whole life.

Of your dad, of losing Devon,

but most of all, of me.

And yet here you are.

What is it that you
think you can do here?

What do you want, Jake?

I'll tell you if you tell me.

I brought you here so
that you would understand.

- [SCREAMS]
- [LAUGHTER]

Understand what?

That whatever it is that
you think you can do here,

it's pointless.

Forget it, Jake.

It's Chuckytown.

[CHUCKYS CACKLING]

[SCREAMING]

[GASPS]

[CHUCKYS CACKLING]

[GASPS]

[SCREAMS]

[BELL TOLLS]

Oh.

[LAUGHING]

What's so f*cking funny?

You had to be there.

Look, Damballa, he asked
us for a bloodbath, right?

And we gave him one.

And your point is?

It's time we start punching our ticket

back to the land of the living.

Maybe paying a visit
to some old friends.

- Hey, hey, hey.
- [LAUGHS]

Relax, will you?

When you get to be my age,
you'll see it's not all

stabby-stabby, on to the next.

You didn't unlock the
secrets of the universe, Pal.

You got old.

I'm just saying that you
don't always have to rush.

It won't k*ll you to stop

and just savor the moment.

"Savor the moment"? [LAUGHS]

- Good Chucky, wait.
- [LAUGHS]

"Savor the moment"?

You sound like a f*cking greeting card.

And you sound like me,
only f*cking stupider!

Do you know where you are, old man?

Do you know who the president is?

Of course I know who the president is.

We just f*cking k*lled him.

Oh, my God, and now you're k*lling me.

You know, kid, I've
learned just a little bit

since I was your age.

And if you want to stack up the bodies,

you got to be a little bit patient!

Shh.

BOTH: f*ck you!

[CLOCK TICKING]

[TENSE MUSIC]

Two minutes left.

He's survived worse.

- Sure.
- We all have, okay?

And we're still here, right?

[WHISPERING] Here we go.

He'll be okay.

He's got to be.

♪ ♪

[DOOR CREAKS]

[SOFT EERIE MUSIC]

♪ ♪

Hey.

Jake? What are you doing here?

Actually, I was looking for you.

Are you dead now too?

Only for a few minutes.

I have to go back.

But first, I need to
talk to you, Chucky.

Good Chucky.

Right. Right. Good Chucky.

Is Caroline dead?

No. Caroline is fine.

She's with Grandfather Wendell.

- Who?
- Wendell Wilkins.

Wendell Wilkins. Okay, I know that name.

Every Good Guy knows
Grandfather Wendell.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]

♪ ♪

What's that for, Jake?

I need to talk to you
about what you were watching

back there with the others.

Yeah.

I guess I don't have
the same sense of humor

as the other guys.

It scared you.

It terrified me.

I can still hear her screams, Jake.

[SCREAMING]

I can never forgive myself.

I know.

I think that's why
you're here, Good Chucky.

That's your unfinished business.

You need to find a way
to forgive yourself.

How?

♪ ♪

[ALARMS BLARING]

[GASPING]

[DISTANT SCREAMING]

I made it. I made it.

Uh, we made it. We made it.

Thank you, sweetie.

- [g*nshots]
- [SCREAMS]

- sn*per.
- I see him.

- [g*nsh*t]
- Get down. Get down!

You know, Erica was supposed
to handle this for me,

but she's just like every
other personal assistant

I've ever had, a major disappointment.

- [g*nshots]
- [SCREAMING]

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[BREATHING HEAVILY]

- Eli. Eli.
- Tiffany!

- I gotta get out of here.
- Tiffany! No!

Stay behind me, Miss Tilly.

[g*nshots]

[DRAMATIC MUSIC]

♪ ♪

[g*nshots

♪ ♪

Tiffany!

[g*nshots]

[GASPING]

[GRUNTS]

No!

It's a pleasure to
serve you, Miss Tilly.

Open the gate. Open the gate.

- But Miss Tilly...
- Shh.

- Miss Tilly.
- Right away, Miss Tilly.

♪ ♪

[g*nsh*t]

Miss Tilly.

Shh.

It's Tiffany.

♪ ♪

[GASPING] No! Tiffany!

♪ ♪

You come back and see
us again, Miss Tilly.

No thank you.

[SCREAMS]

[SHOUTING AND CHEERING]

♪ ♪

You're dead, Tiffany!

You're f*cking dead!

[LAUGHS]

[TIRES SQUEALING]

f*ck!

[HELICOPTER WHIRRING]

♪ ♪

[BEEPING]

[TENSE MUSIC]

♪ ♪

Put your hands in the air.

Now.

♪ ♪

I'd prefer you put the
g*n down, Agent Hicks.

But I'm not picky.

Either way, this family's
going down tonight.

[CLOCK TICKING]

Jake?

You want me to...

sacrifice myself?

But Jake, I will cease to exist.

And then you'll never be able
to hurt anyone else ever again.

I can't believe you're
asking me to do this.

It's the only way. I'm sorry.

But you're my godfather, Jake.

You're supposed to protect me.

I can't, Good Chucky.

Not after what you did to Nadine.

But you did the same
to your father, Jake.

What? What are you...

[EERIE MUSIC]

♪ ♪

Yeah, you fried him up
real nice, as I recall.

I can still smell him.

f*cking love that smell.

Like napalm in the morning.

I didn't do that. You did that.

But you let me do it, Jake.

You could have stopped
me, but you didn't.

Jake?

You know you need to do this.

You know because there's good in you.

If you do this, you take
all of us down with you.

You realize that?

We're all Charles Lee Ray.

That's the problem.

We're all the same.

No.

No, you're different, Good Chucky.

You're the one who can end this.

Right now.

You can do it.

Will it hurt?

I don't know.

[SCREAMING]

[SHAKILY] One, two,

three...

four, five, six,

seven, eight, nine, ten...

[SINGSONG] 11, 12,





[LAUGHS]

♪ ♪

Wait, where's the other one?

- Hmm?
- The older one.

Where's Chucky Prime?

Well, Jake, right now,

he's busy possessing your body.

[VOICE LOWERING] Which you stupidly

left unattended back on Earth.

[LAUGHS]

We were just here to distract you.

[LAUGHTER]

That was sick.

What can I say, Jake?

I gotta be me.

And by that, I mean I gotta be you.

[ALL CACKLING]

No!

No!

[ALARM BEEPING]

Time's up. We gotta bring him back.

Guys, where the f*ck is Pryce?

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]

♪ ♪

Come on, Jake.

♪ ♪

- No, no, no, no.
- It's not working.

Come on.

Come on.

♪ ♪

Come on.

No! No! Devon! Devon!

♪ ♪

Devon?

No.

No. No.

♪ ♪

Ow!

Oh, my God, Jake.

Thank God.

Are you okay?

I think so.

It's all a bit of a blur.

It's good to have you back, cowboy.

We thought we lost you.

I'm so glad to see you
guys, especially you two.

[CLOCK TICKING]

So what happened?

We did it. We got him.

[EXPLOSIONS]

You got him to...

I'd... I'd rather not talk about it.

Of course.

[EXPLOSIONS]

I hate v*olence, as you know.

I'm a lover, not a
fighter, right, Devon?

[CHUCKLES] Ow.

What about Caroline?

Did he tell you where she is?

Absolutely. I got an address.

- Uh, guys? Guys.
- [EXPLOSIONS BOOMING]

We gotta go. Now.

Come on, let's go!

[DRAMATIC MUSIC]

♪ ♪

[expl*si*n BOOMS]

[BOTH SHOUT]

♪ ♪

The elevator!

[CRASHING AND SHATTERING]

Hurry, let's go!

♪ ♪

[GRUNTS]

[AS CHUCKY] Jake's f*cking ripped, man.

That's for sending him in after me.

Chucky?

♪ ♪

Oh, my God, Jake.

I gotta find Hicks.

You guys gotta get out of here.

No, Grant, I'm not leaving you.

Now.

Jake!

Go.

- Go.
- Jake!

- Devon, go!
- Jake!

♪ ♪

[CACKLING]

[ELEVATOR DINGS]

You know, Timmy, you're gonna be

real popular on the other side.

I made a few friends in there,

told them to keep an eye out for you.

So just be sure to tell
'em Chucky sent you.

[CACKLING]

[SCREAMING]

♪ ♪

Hicks! Hicks!

Hicks. Hicks.

No.

[GASPING]

Don't let me die a failure.

I want you to promise me
you'll get the hell out of here

in one piece, okay?

Okay, I promise. I promise.

♪ ♪

Take this. Go.

What's this?

Hicks, please, no. No.

[CRYING] No.

Sacrifices must be made, son.

I wish I could say I'm
sorry it's come to this,

but the truth is, I kind of like it.

♪ ♪

[YELLS]

♪ ♪

Been nice knowing you, son.

- [SCREAMS]
- [GRUNTS]

♪ ♪

[COUGHING]

Open the door.

Open the g*dd*mn door.

[GLASS SHATTERS]

Oh, sh*t.

Hey!

I swear to God, I'll k*ll you all

before the sun comes up!

[expl*si*n BOOMING]

♪ ♪

[DRAMATIC CHORAL SINGING]

♪ ♪

[SCREAMING]

[SCREAMING]

[GLASS SHATTERING]

♪ ♪

[SOFT MUSIC]

♪ ♪

[SIRENS WAILING]

♪ ♪

[INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER]

Grant. Grant!

Grant! Grant!

- Grant. Grant.
- Mom!

[GASPING]

Oh. Are you okay?

♪ ♪

[GASPS] Jake.

Where's Timmy?

Timmy didn't make it.

- No.
- It was so awful in there.

You don't even want to know.

You okay?

I will be.

Where's Caroline?

Yeah, you said Chucky
gave you an address.

Right. Caroline.

First things first.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]

[TENSE MUSIC]

♪ ♪

Caroline is here?

That's what that dimwit nimrod fuckwad

little devil doll said.

Whose house is this?

Apparently his name is Wendell Wilkins.

So just follow my lead.

I know what I'm doing.

- Wendell Wilkins.
- [KEYPAD BEEPING]

Wendell Wilkins. Why
does that sound familiar?

I still say we should call the police.

No. No.

They said no cops, or they'll k*ll her.

[GATE CREAKING]

♪ ♪

[KNOCK AT DOOR]

Hello, sir. We're so
sorry to bother you.

- Are you Mr. Wilkins?
- Who are you?

My name is Jake Wheeler.

And this handsome young
man is the light of my life,

Devon Evans.

We're h*m*.

And this is our f*g
hag BFF Alexandra Cross.

Jake!

It's very nice to meet you.

I actually have a very
active social life of my own

with straight boys.

I don't usually have visitors,

let alone children.

We're so sorry to barge in unannounced.

It's just... well,
we've been through a lot,

the three of us.

We all met recently in
the foster care system.

Our parents, they're all
victims of horrific murders.

How dreadful.

It has been, yes.

But the only ray of light...

Has been finding each other.

What do you want?

It's actually a matter
of life and death.

Yeah. Can we come in, please?

All right, yes.

For pity's sake, come
in out of the cold.

Thank you.

When you mentioned that
your parents were m*rder*d,

I knew we were kindred spirits.

When you lose someone that
way, you develop a keen eye

for others that have lived
through a similar nightmare.

My son Tommy was stabbed by a madman

in a shopping mall in 1983.

- That's awful.
- Yeah, I'm so sorry.

He was eight years old.

- Oh, my God.
- Don't try to touch me.

I'm sorry.

No. I'm sorry.

Ever since that day,

the touch of a child makes me recoil.

That makes sense.

You'll have to excuse the mess.

I had to let Jasmine go

once the royalty checks dried up.

I haven't had anybody clean for me in,

I don't know, two decades?

[FANCIFULLY EERIE MUSIC]

Wait a minute, you collect dolls?

Well, not exactly.

I created them, all of them.

All my children.

Of course.

Wendell Wilkins. I've read about you.

You created the Good Guys.

Yes, among some other
very popular lines,

but the Good Guys were
always my favorite.

Wait. I'm confused. Is my sister here?

You have to realize,

after the murders started in 1988,

the Good Guy doll ruined me
professionally, financially,

and, I have to admit, psychologically.

This is the original Good Guy doll.

♪ ♪

The prototype.

I created it right in this very house

in 1987.

If I couldn't hear my own boy laugh,

I figured I could do my part

and make other children
laugh all over the world.

When the murders started,

all the laughter turned to screams.

But then,

the last few weeks, a new
child came into my life,

a little girl the same age as Tommy.

But she didn't come to soothe or to hug.

No.

She came to tell me the good news.

Caroline!

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]

Caroline helped me see

the beauty of what Chucky has wrought.

Hey, Chucky.

[LAUGHS] Nice perm.

[AS CHUCKY] Not for long.

♪ ♪

- [GASPS]
- Oh.

Oh, sh*t.

Jake's hair is naturally curly,

you monsters.

Where the hell is Jake?

Still in the spirit realm.

But we're gonna fix that now.

'Cause in my experience,

human possession has
been kinda a mixed bag.

Oh, I just want to be me again.

'Cause I'm just so f*cking cute.

Thank Damballa you still had it.

Hail Damballa.

Hail Damballa!

And our little contingency
plan worked like a charm.

Good job, kid.

Caroline?

I found my purpose, Lexy.

I'm Chucky's real friend till the end.

No.

No, you don't have to do what
Chucky says anymore, okay?

Or Mr. Wilkins.

I'm here now.

I'm so sorry it took
me so long to find you.

This is who I am now.

If you don't like it, k*ll me.

What? No.

Bring Jake back now.

Don't worry. [CHUCKLES]

Caroline is well-versed in
the dark arts of Damballa.

Aren't you, sweet face?

I dabble.

♪ ♪

Ade due, Damballa.

Give me the power, I beg of you.

Ade due, Damballa!

Give me the power, I beg of you!

Ade due, Damballa!

Give me the power, I beg of you!

[LAUGHS]

Jake!

Jake.

Hey.

♪ ♪

It is you.

What happened?

Congratulations, Jake.

You finally really k*lled a man.

Don't listen to him, Jake.

You didn't do anything.

Chucky did it.

Timmy's a pile of
bones and ashes by now.

And I couldn't have done it without you.

You think about that, Jakey-boy.

Delighted to finally meet you, my boy.

No father could be prouder.

Don't get any ideas, Pops.

I'm 65 f*cking years old.

I don't need a father figure.

I'm the boss of me.

Ha!

So what now, Caroline?

What are you gonna do to us?

You gonna k*ll us too? You
gonna k*ll your own sister?

We were,

but Grandfather Wendell
had a better idea.

Let's face it, I'm getting on.

I can't live alone here forever.

What this house needs and what it's been

sorely lacking for years is life,

laughter, and...

children.

[GROWLS]

♪ ♪

[DRAMATIC MUSIC]

♪ ♪

Oh.

Aww, Chucky, they're adorable.

Can we keep them?

Absolutely not.

They're my children now,

and they'll be excellent company.

At least you know
they're not gonna breed.

Not with those two.

[BOTH LAUGH]

You heard from GG?

Not for a couple of months. Have you?

I miss them.

Oh, Chucky,

don't you wish we could
be a real family again?

Well, I have something for you.

Ooh. A surprise?

Oh! [SQUEALS]

Oh, Chucky.

Is this a proposal?

Is that a yes?

Um... well, it's a big decision.

Yes!

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

[LAUGHING] Yes!

Yes.

Congratulations.

Fortunately, I saved her prototype too.

Good thing.

'Cause they're never gonna
stop looking for Jennifer Tilly.

It's only a matter of time.

You're right, Chucky.

It's time.

I'm ready.

[ENGINE REVVING]

[TIRES SQUEALING]

[PHONE BEEPING]

♪ ♪

Hello?

[MUFFLED SHOUTING]

♪ ♪

Nica!

- Nica!
- Nica!

Oh.

[GASPING]

- He's coming, Nica!
- Look out behind you!

He's behind you! Look behind you!

- Nica, help!
- Oh, my...

Nica, behind you!

- Look out!
- Nica!

- Nica, look out!
- Look out!

Oh, my God, Nica, look behind you!

- I don't...
- [LAUGHS]

[SCREAMING]

[SUPERGRASS' "ALRIGHT"]

♪ ♪

♪ We are young ♪

♪ We run green ♪

♪ Keep our teeth nice and clean ♪

♪ See our friends, see the sights ♪

♪ Feel all right ♪ [BOTH MOANING]

♪ We wake up, we go out ♪

I am too young for this sh*t.

♪ Put it out ♪

♪ See our friends ♪

♪ See the sights ♪

♪ Feel all right ♪

♪ ♪

[STATIC CRACKLES]

My fellow Americans,

in times of hardship such as these,

it is important to remember
the good things in life.

m*rder, mayhem,

and malicious intent.

These are the values I
have always held dear.

And it has been my honor
to uphold these principles

for lo these many years.

Now, tonight, I am proud
to officially announce

my candidacy for a
fourth consecutive term.

Donations to my campaign can
be made directly to the number

you now see on your screen.

But if you have any doubts at all,

I ask you to please consider
the many accomplishments

of my hugely successful third term.

- [SCREAMING]
- [g*nsh*t]

[ALL SCREAMING]

[CACKLING]

[BOTH SCREAMING]

Oh, sh*t!

Thank you, good night,

and God bless each and every one of you,

except Devon.

[CACKLING]