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02x13 - The Devil's Pitchfork

Posted: 02/20/23 18:03
by bunniefuu
[Mugman imitates plane engine]

[theme music playing]

♪ Come with me to the Inkwell Isles

♪ It's just off the coast
Maybe miles ♪

♪ Where there's good and bad
And then there's in-between ♪

♪ With Cuphead and Mugman
You'll see what I mean ♪

♪ Ice cream and rockets
Trouble never ends ♪

♪ Watch these ding-dongs
As they make new friends ♪

♪ They'll need some help
Just to stay on track ♪

♪ Oh no, there's that guy
Better watch your back ♪

♪ Well, if you're looking for fun ♪

♪ Yes, we're looking for fun ♪

♪ And a dash of heebie-jeebies ♪

♪ We've got the heebie-jeebies ♪

♪ Then pack your bags and let's go
Welcome to The Cuphead Show ♪

♪ Welcome to The Cuphead Show ♪

[plays sad trombone]

[groans]

[menacing organ music plays]

[knocking at door]

Duh, boss, wakey, wakey.

[grunts]

Aw, boss, you've been in here for days.

Come on, get up.
Look what a beautiful day it is.

-[souls screaming]
-[creature roars]

Uh, I know what'll cheer you up.

Just listen to these headlines.

"Invasive beetles devastate crops."

"Meteor hurtling towards orphanage."

Ooh, meteor!

"Four horses of the apocabalypse
on the loose."

What a time to be the Devil, huh?

[groans weakly]

Hey, there's a review. Of you!

What's that? Ooh, gimme!

"Once in a rare while, a figure
commands our respect, summons our fear,

and effortlessly tempts us
into unhinged depravity."

Did you hear that, Henchman?
Unhinged depravity! [laughs]

"For millennia, it was clear
without debate who that figure was."

"After a recent string
of humiliating setbacks, however,

it has become blatantly apparent
that the Devil is losing his touch"?

"A silly caricature
of his once powerful self."

"Time to pass the walking stick
on to the next contender"?

[in demonic voice] It's a pitchfork!

[screams]

Stupid critic.

[whimpers] What does he know?

[sad music plays]

Hey, you know what I would do
if I was you?

[scoffs]

I'd take my pitchfork and have some fun.

Go to the surface,
torment some souls, blow off some steam.

I'm just saying.

You are the Devil, after all.

You know, Henchman, you're right.

I am the Devil.

[ominous music plays]

I need to get out there
and be the Devil I was born to be.

Thank you, Henchman.

I'm about to make
a lot of people very miserable.

That's my boss.

[cheerful music plays]

[Cuphead] Now can I look?

[Mugman] Not yet.

How about now?

[Mugman] No! No.

-Wait, wait.
-[ratchet cranking]

Ta-da!

[gasps]

[sad trombone plays]

You mutilated our bikes!

It's a present.

I made our bikes into a tandem bike.

Now we can ride bikes together.

We already did ride bikes together,

separately!

But now we can ride
our bikes together, together!

[groans] Do we always
have to do everything together?

[sobbing] You hate it!

Ugh.

I should probably
try it out before I judge.

Great. Let's go!

Yippee!

[bicycle bell ringing]

[sniffs]

[sighs]

[upbeat jazzy music playing]

-[all crying]
-[laughs]

[screams]

[pigeon honks]

[bell rings]

[tires screech]

-[crashing]
-[horns honk]

[laughs]

[screaming]

[roars]

[sighs happily]

Lost my touch? I think not.

-[elevator bell dings]
-Hiya, boss. So, how was it?

It was great!

I feel like my old wicked self again.

Details. I want details.

Very well, Henchman.

First, I tortured some children, then I…

You know what, Mugsy? I take it all back.

This is some great bike.

You mind pedallin' faster?

I could use
a little, uh, breeze back here.

[snorts] A breeze, huh?

You know what? You're a real pain in my--

Stop! Look!

[tires squeal]

[tense music plays]

Is that what I think it is?

It can't be.

Oh, but it is.

Wait, don't touch it!

What if only the Devil can use it?

But what if anyone can use it?

-[elevator bell dings]
-Oh, the sound of screaming.

[laughs]

Ah, what a delicious day.

[sighs] Precious memories.

Just me and my pitchfork and, uh…

[gasps]

[mutters nervously]

Where's my pitchfork?

[dramatic music plays]

[Cuphead] Ready, aim, fire!

Whoa.

Are you okay?

[groans]

This thing sure packs a wallop.

I think we'd have more control
if we both held onto it.

Funny. Huh! I thought you didn't want
to always do everything together.

Did I say that?

Mm-hmm!

Well, if it makes you feel any better,

there isn't anybody else I'd rather
go around blowing stuff up with.

Aw, gee, Cuphead.

Now let's go blow stuff up.

[raucous jazzy music playing]

[both laughing wildly]

It's not under here.

It's not back here.

Where is it?

-Did I have it with me in the elevator?
-Uh, I don't know.

Well, look around. Find it!

Ah, calm down.

You calm down!

Well, let's retrace our steps.

Where did you have it last?

Well, I mutated some pigeons in the park,

then I went to the zoo
and released all the carnivores,

and then I set the city on fire, uh, hmm…

[gasps] I left it against that tree!

[both laughing]

[raucous music continues]

Whoa. This is new.

[both] Whoa!

-[elevator bell dings]
-It was right here! I'm sure of it.

Wow, nice work, boss.

You really, uh, burnt everything up.

I didn't do that,

which means someone has my pitchfork!

[grumbles]

[laughing]

Wonder what else this thing can do.

Well, there is something
I've always wanted to try.

[mellow Italian music plays]

Heh? Heh?

This is what you always wanted to try?

Gimme that!

[raucous jazzy music plays]

[growls]

[seething]

[chittering]

[chittering]

[laughs]

-[roars]
-[screams]

[screeches]

-[screams]
-[chittering]

[groans]

So, are you gonna introduce me
to your little friend?

-[roaring]
-[dishes shatter]

Uh, maybe we should go.

Mugsy, old boy, earlier today,
when you mutilated our bikes,

you did something nice for me.

Now, I want to mutilate
something nice for you.

-[people screaming]
-[creatures growling]

[rock crumbling]

[Mugman] Can I look now?

Not yet. Almost there.

How about…

[muttering fearfully]

Cuphead!

Patience.

Ta-da!

It's Mount Mugmore!

What do you think?

[The Devil] Very nice.

Aww, thanks, Devil, but actually…

The Devil!

I believe you have something of mine.

Hand it over.

Uh, okay. Sure. Sorry.

We-- We-- We was just horsin' around.

[exclaims]

Oh wow, that-- that was an accident.

Here.

[screams]

[breathing heavily]

[groaning]

-[growls]
-Okay, okay. Sorry, really.

Seriously, here you go.

[groans]

You're doing that on purpose!

Uh-uh.

[screams]

[laughing]

[Mugman chuckles]

[grumbles]

You think this is funny?

You think you have the upper hand
just because you have my pitchfork

and your soul debt has expired?

[gasps]

Ah…

"Expired soul debt"?

Wait, wait, wait.
Hold it. Stop everything.

Did you just say expired soul debt?
He just said expired soul debt.

Lemme get this straight.
I no longer owe him my soul,

and I have his pitchfork?

Oh, the humiliation.

Oh wow. Now this is just sad.

Here, you should have this.
It belongs to you.

And you-- you won't zap me?

No, I promise.

[exclaims]

[both laugh]

Aw, jeez.

[wind whooshing]

[The Devil] You have taken
something of great value to me,

so I shall take something
of great value to you.

Ha! There's nothing you can take
from me that I care about.

-[flames roar]
-[elevator dings]

Say goodbye to Cuphead.

"Goodbye to Cuphead."

[laughs]

[laughs maniacally]

Mugman?

[discordant notes play]

[menacing organ music playing]