01x01 - Cabin Raid!

[bunniefuu]

[gentle music]

♪ Camp Splinterwood ♪

♪ Our summer home ♪

[rock music]

♪ For catapulting, slingshotting,
Getting thrown ♪

♪ Campers rocket through the trees ♪

♪ Cannonballing where they please ♪

♪ Zipping in the air
Crashing everywhere ♪

♪ Archery, Dodgebird
Borb tennis -- it's absurd! ♪

♪ Here they come
Red, Stella, b*mb and Chuck ♪

♪ Flying fast
Look out, duck ! ♪

♪ All your life you'll be glad
You had this ♪

♪ Angry Birds Summer Madness ♪

[whimsical music]

[cooing]

[Lynette over P.A.]
Good morning, Camp Splinterwood!

As you head out to your next activity,

be sure to look out for--

[loud]
Care packages!

[whistling]

Huh?

Huh?!

Ooh! Oh!

[panting]

Whew!

[air whistling]

[Lynette over P.A.]
Have a Splinterwood-iful day!

Look, I know our counselors expect us
to… sh**t some hoops,

but sports isn't really my thing-- Ow!

So, why don't we… take it easy and--

[shouts]
Will you stop that?

Oh…

Neiderflyer.

Uh, this basketbird court is taken.

We were here first!

You want to fight for it?

Oh, please say yes.

I can't even remember the last time
I was in a fight.

Um, just now, in Arts and Crafts?

You got a problem, vase?

I'll tell you what. I'll let one of you
sh**t for it. Make it, take it.

Look, Neiderflyer, you're being
as charming as always.

By which I mean, not charming at all.
But, how dumb do you think we are?

Should I sh**t from over here? Or here?

How about here?

[shouts]
How about over here?

[Stella] Chuck! I'm open!

Ugh!

-Oh!
-Ah!

Oh yeah. In your beak--

-Yoink!
-[groans]

No. Not you. Him.

Uh…

Okay, it's all on you.

This is it. One sh*t for the win.
No pressure.

Okay, maybe some pressure.
Maybe a lot of pressure.

But it's okay.

[shouts]
Just don't think about the pressure!

Not helping, Chuck. b*mb, you got this.

[snickering]

[deep breaths]

Ahh!

And that is game.

Hey, look! It's a care package
somebird's parents flung from home.

Looks like a nice one, too.

We'll take that.

I don't see your name on it, Neiderflyer.

I don't see yours either, Maroon.

Come on, you know my name is Red.

So sorry, did I say maroon? I meant moron.

That's it!

[gasps] Yes, that is it!

Hi, Matilda.

Oh my. Your chakras… they are just--

Ooh, they are bursting with energy,
aren't they?

Uh-huh.

Anyhoo, like I was saying, that is it!
My campers' care package.

I thank you and the universe
for finding it.

No problem. I mean, what kind of jerk
would take candy from a hatchling?

[crash]

Cabin raid!

[snickering]

Guess that answers my question.

[wailing]

How could Neiderflyer do that?

It makes me angry!

And when I get mad, I get--

[female voice] Lunch!

I guess I get lunch.

But after lunch, I get even.

I'm gonna raid Neiderflyer's bunk
and get the hatchlings' care package back!

Now, we just need a plan.

Okay, okay, plan.
Ooh! I got it.

b*mb blows up Neiderflyer's cabin

while the rest of us use paddles
to tunnel in from below.

Wait, no, that's a terrible idea.

Okay, forget that.

So we push Neiderflyer's bunk to the lake,
float it onto the water,

and then swing over
from the bungee rope course

and board it like pirates.

Arrh! Ha ha ha.

Actually, that's a dumb idea, too.

How about we borrow nurses' uniforms
from the infirmary

and then quarantine
Neiderflyer's bunk for bird flu…

-No, that's a plan--
-[Red] Hey wait!

This one's not so crazy.
This could actually work.

Give it to me straight. It's bad, right?

[sobbing]

Look, I'm not going to lie to you.

It's bad.

[shouting]

And here you go.

I can't believe that worked
and without any consequences whatsoever.

Up top!

Cabin raid. [whistles]

-[snickering]
-Whoa!

-You put them in Terence's cabin?
-Yup.

Why are you doing this? This seems like
way too much effort for you.

Maybe because I never get care packages.

Or maybe I'm just bored.
Slow day at the office.

Neider-jerk.

[rumbling footsteps]

[whispers] He's here.

Droppings!

Okay, look, yes,
Terence is on the large side,

but how tough can he really--

Is he bench pressing his cabin?

We gotta get the hatchlings out!

Yeah, you guys seem to have this
under control, so I'm just gonna--

This is my fault.

If I hadn't gotten mad, the hatchlings
wouldn't be in this mess.

I gotta learn to control myself.

What? No, Red.

You getting angry and making sure
bullies and jerks don't ruin our summer,

that's what makes this the best camp ever!

Well, that and the marshmallows.

Ugh! You're crushing my hollow bird bones.

Thanks.

And thanks for saying all that, buddy.

Yeah, I never knew you could talk
that much. I like it.

Me too. And you're right.
We gotta fix this.

By pulling one last raid
on Terence's cabin.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait!

No, no, no, no! I meant we should go
tell our counselor… Mighty Eagle.

Sorry, boys, I got bigger problems.

This bod? It's not gonna tan itself.

That's literally how tanning works.

Yeah, that's-- that's great, guys.

Hey, ladies, got any extra sunblock?

-I got a lot of real estate to cover here.
-[girls giggling]

Ugh! I guess it does have to be us.

Okay, we're gonna need
an amazing plan

because if Terence even suspects
we messed with his bunk,

he'll stomp our beaks
straight out of our butts!

You don't need to come up with a plan.
You already did!

I did? I thought my plans
were too crazy to work.

They totally were, on their own.

But put them together and you got a plan
that's so cuckoo insane,

it just might work!

[Hatchlings giggling]

Come on, you gotta explode.

The whole plan starts with you blowing up,
so don't blow it, I mean, do blow it!

Not helping.

Maybe this will.

Chuck said the hatchlings were in trouble,
and the only thing that will help is this.

Fire in the face hole!

Everybody out!

Two, three, four. Yup, we're all here.

Including him!

[rumbling footsteps]

We're too far away for him
to see who we are!

Terence doesn't know
which campers to pound!

What are you doing?

Making sure Terence knows who to pound!

-[Stella] That's a terrible idea.
-[Red] If I can just--

[all screaming]

Everybody off!

[Hatchlings giggling and cooing]

b*mb's away!

You got it.

No! I meant b*mb's away from where
he was gonna catch me!

I'm fine.

Oh, thank you!

Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Uh, could you hold these for a second?

[flame sizzling]

[expl*si*n]

Stella, jump.

You don't have to crash
and burn with me.

You're dang right I don't.

Ever since kindergarten
you've been getting me in trouble.

And if you think I'd miss a minute of it,
you're insane!

Ha ha! Whoo-hoo!

[air whistling]

Oh, I can't wait to dig into this thing.

[crash]

[rumbling footsteps]

[growling]

What? How did your cabin get here?

I-- I didn't-- No, please don't pound me.

Please don't pound me! No!

I believe this is yours.

[all cooing]

Aw. They'd like to share it with you.

-Sweet.
-Gimme, gimme, gimme!

After all that I would have thought
this would taste better.

That's probably because it's underwear.

Ahh!

[giggling]

[rumbling footsteps]

[Neiderflyer crying]
Mommy!

[theme music plays]