01x05 - Rolling Down the River/The Mario Monster Mash

[bunniefuu]

Hey Paisanos!

it's the Super Mario
Brother's Super Show!

♪ We're the Mario Brothers,
and plumbing's our game, ♪

♪ we're not like the
others who get all the fame. ♪

♪ If your sink is in trouble
you can call us on the double, ♪

♪ we're faster than the
others you'll be hooked on the ♪

♪ brothers Unh! ♪

♪ H-hooked on the brothers. ♪

♪ Gimme gimme, gimme gimme. ♪

♪ Yo, you're in for a treat,
so hang on to your seat, ♪

♪ get ready for adventure
and remarkable feats. ♪

♪ You'll meet Koopas, the
Troopas the Princess and the ♪

♪ others, hanging with the
plumbers you'll be hooked on ♪

♪ the brothers. ♪

♪ To the brink! ♪

♪ Unh! ♪

♪ Unh! ♪

♪ I say h-h-h-h-hooked
on the brothers! ♪

♪ The brothers! ♪

♪ ♪ The brothers! ♪ ♪

Mario, why do you suppose our
new neighbour wants us to help

him with his
latest experiment?

I mean who is this guy anyhow?

Dr. Frank N. Stein, from
Pennsylvania.

You meatball,
that's not Pennsylvania,

that's Transylvania.

So it's Dr. Stein
from Pennsylvania,

so what?

So what?

Ok,

Frank N. Stein, say it fast.

Frankenstein!

Not that fast.

A little slower, with me.

[Both:] Frank N. Stein.

Frank N. Stein.

Frank N. Stein.

Frank N. Stein.

Frankenstein
from Transylvania!

Ahhhhh!

[thunder clap]

Are you Dr. Frankenstein?

Settle a bet, doc.

Are you the same Dr.
Frankenstein that created that

big ugly scary monster?

Yes, but I wouldn't
talk about him like that.

Why not?

[growl]

He's very sensitive.

♪ Yo, yo! ♪

♪ It's the Mario Brothers
and plumbing's their game, ♪

♪ found the secret warp zone
while working on the drain, ♪

♪ lend the princess a
hand in the Mushroom Land. ♪

♪ Comin' atcha
with the plumbers, ♪

♪ you'll be hooked
on the brothers! ♪

♪ Noooooow, Evil Koopa and his
Troopas are up to misbehaving, ♪

♪ they kidnapped the princess;
Mushroom Land needs saving. ♪

♪ Abusing and confusing
everybody he discovers, ♪

♪ they can't help but be
hooked on the brothers! ♪

♪ ♪ Unh! ♪ ♪

Plumber's
log number .

The river world.

Princess Toadstool is being
held c*ptive on a sinister

star, a river boat under
the command of Captain Koopa.

First mate Mouse
reporting, Captain.

No sign of stowaways.

Those pinhead plumbers
are bound to try and rescue

princess toadstool.

And I intend to
capture them before they do.

Out of my way, rodent.

[Mario:] Alright,
gentlemen, any sevens?

No?

Well then go fish!

How much longer we
gotta keep these guys busy?

Until toad finds the princess,
or I win all their money!

Captain Koop sends happy
birthday cake for Princess!

Voila!

Hey!

What kind of birthday cake?

Happy!

Happy?

Impostor!

I never use the H word!

Whoops!

Woah!

Oh no!

Toad, it's you!

Who did you
expect, Pee Wee Herman?

Now all I need is those
faucet freak Mario brothers.

I don't like it Toad
should have been back by now.

You worry too much, Luigi!

About time the food came.

[gasp]

Uh oh!

Thought you
could cheat us, huh?

Woah!

Hey, it's the Mario brothers!

So, what do we do now
mister big time gambler?

Run for it!

[steam whistle blows]

What do we do now?

When in doubt, jump!

[growl]

Yikes!

Grrr!

You win some, you lose some!

Oh no, trouters!

The game's not over, swim!

Yeeow!

Howdy boys, I'm Mark Twang,
captain of the Dingbell,

who are you?

Grateful!

I wish I could help you
boys save your princess.

I'm after the
Sinister Star myself.

At least I was, until that
conniving Koopa sabotaged the

Dingbell's steam engine.

I'm just plain sunk, boys.

I'll never win my race with
Koopa to be king of the river.

And we'll never get
Princess and Toad back.

We'll fix this mess.

What's a steam engine but
a fancy way to move water

through pipes?

[steam whistle blows]

[Koopa:] Your pushy
plumber friends are finished,

Princess!

Captain, Captain!

Don't interrupt me.

Not while I'm
boasting and gloating.

As I was saying, with Mark
Twang out of the race...

That's just it, sir!

Twang's right behind us!

What?

I don't believe it!

How did Twang fix
that steam engine?

No no no!

It's that muttonhead Mario!

We need more steam.

More steam?

Right away.

Give her all you got, Luigi!

Ok, Mario, one all you
got, coming right up!

[Princess:] You
might as well give up,

Koopa!

Yeah!

The Mario
brothers will save us!

Let them come.

I have a big
surprise for them.

Bring me the
black pit bob-ombs!

T-t-t-t-he black pit bob-ombs?

Are you sure about
that, captain Koopa?

Don't question my
orders, you rotten rodent!

Just do it!

Black pit bob-ombs?

Oh, I don't like
the sound of that.

Down the drain with
those pesky pipe pushers!

[Twang:] Great
jumping bullfrogs!

Mario, what's
going on up here?

We've got a little problem.

The current's
too strong, boys.

We're done for.

I can't stop her.

We're doomed.

Leaping lasagna!

Help is on the way!

So long boys.

It was nice knowing you!

But there's no
avoiding the black pit!

You hear that, Mario?

We're fish bait!

Stop shaking, Luigi, and pull!

[boom!]

[steam whistle blows]

Hooray!

You saved the Dingbell!

So what?

Those pinhead plumbers will
never get past the black pit.

I'll still win this race
and become king of the river!

It ain't over 'til
it's over, lizard lips!

Stop wisecracking, mushroom,
or I'll turn you into soup!

[gasp]

[Luigi:] If you're asking
me there's no way

past that black pit.

Well, only one thing to do.

We'll go to the
mouth of the river.

The mouth of the
river, where's that?

Not where, who.

The mouth knows
everything about the river.

She'll know what to do.

[Mouth:] You came to
the right place, boys.

I'm the fastest
mouth in the south.

And my advice is nice.

I see all, tell all, and
cure your bunions to boot.

When my lips flap the
river world listens!

Tell us how we can sail the
Dingbell past the black pit!

Take it straight from
the mouth, boys.

There won't be a black pit
if the river goes around it.

Yo, how can the
river go around it?

You're asking me?

You're the plumbers!

Let's pipe this river down!

[Twang:] The river is
going around the black pit!

Now that's what I
call super plumbing!

[bell ringing]

[Twang:] But I'm
afraid I've got bad news.

Koopa's got too
big a head start.

No way we can catch him.

No way, you're wrong!

I'll tell you a way.

I'm the mouth of the
river, just read my lips!

These magic doodads are
more powerful than pasta.

Huh?

No, no, no!

I hate those pesky plumbers!

Jump faster, boys!

We're catching up to Koopa!

Yay, Marios!

[Mouth:] Get ready to board,

and kick Koopa in
the kisser for me!

Put me down, you
wrench monkey!

Only if you let
our friends go,

Captain Cuckoo!

[Twang:] The Marios
jumped too fast!

The
paddlewheel's still turning,

and I can't stop!

Thanks Mario!

Thanks Luigi!

Looks like you guys
saved the day again.

Almost.

Mama mia!

[lip smacking]

Don't I get a last
request or something?

A pepperoni cheesecake?

Fettuccini sundae?

Are you kidding?

I'm a villain, remember?

Don't worry, Mario.

We'll think of something.

We will?

It's Mark Twang!

And the Dingbell!

[Mouth:] And don't forget me!

Madam Mouth,
number one know-all,

tell-all, river riding
roustabout of the south.

Man the g*ns!

Keelhaul the anchor!

Sink that side-wheeler!

Let's get this
showboat off the road.

[Koopa:] Yeeeeoow!

[laughter]

[Toad:] What a
stick in the mud!

Laugh now, sewer scum.

But when I get out of
here I'll plug your pipes.

[bell ringing]

[All:] To Mark Twang,
king of the river!

Long may he reign!

Aww shucks, thanks, folks.

Now let's get this
victory dinner rolling.

[Mario:] Victory dinner?

At last!

The Mouth herself
cooked this up just for you,

mighty Mario.

Delicious catfish pizza.

Delightful.

Catfish pizza?

This may be a first,
but I'm not hungry.

Make sure you strap
him in real tight.

Ok Mario, I got him.

I got him.

No offense intended with that
big horrible scary monster

line.

Mario, I think he forgives you.

I think we're almost ready.

What are you doing, doc?

He's so cranky, I had to
promise him a normal brain.

Oh, you know, I guess
you might do in a pinch.

You're not going
to take my brain.

I might need it someday.

Ah, you're no good.

Your brother is
a party pooper.

Come.

Help me find a normal brain.

Doc, are you kidding me?

In Brooklyn?

Oh yeah, go ahead, I'm
just going to take a nap.

And Luigi, don't forget the
pasta and the beans and some

oregano.

Luigi, will you,
come on, Luigi,

cut it out Luigi.

Please, I'm trying
to sleep, Luigi!

Please.

Oh!

Oooh!

Oh!

Oooh!

Oh!

Ooh, scary.

Something tells me we'd better
be right back after these

exciting scenes from
the Legend of Zelda.

This is the
Triforce of Wisdom,

Link.

The evil wizard Gannon
has the Triforce of Power.

Whoever gets both Triforces
will rule this land forever.

You must help me, Link.

Hey, for you Zelda, anything.

[Sprite:] Help!

I'm coming, Sprite!

Woah!

I should have stayed in bed!

Oh no!

Is that what they
call a royal flush?

Spare me the jokes.

I think Gannon's
up to something.

Oh no, Gannon
got the Triforce!

Nice job, hero.

Hey, I was sick.

You'll be sicker if we
don't get that Triforce back.

I personally guarantee it.

Let's go!

Maybe my magic
will do something!

Now doc, I mean don't
look so disappointed.

We got a lot of
people in Brooklyn.

We've got pool players,
we got beautiful girls,

we got restaurants,
we got carpenters,

plumbers, but normal?

Heh heh, forget about it.

Yo, Mario!

I got everything
you asked me for.

I got macaroni,
I got the beans,

I even got some cereal.

[Mario's voice:] Where
have you guy's been?

Grrrrrr!

Mama mia!

Mario?

Talk to me!

What have you
done to my brother?

You've got to get
Mario's brain back!

I mean I know it's
small, but he's all I got.

Don't be ridiculous, he never
used that brain before anyway.

[Mario:] Luigi, it's me, Mario!

Mario?

Mario!

Mario!

Mario?

Mario!

Mario!

That's it.

Doc, doc, you've
got to do something,

you've got to help me.

There's not enough
juice left in this thing.

Wait, this calls for
scientific hands on treatment.

Boom!

Oh, that cleared my sinuses!

Grrr!

Oh, my Frank!

Oh, Frank, Frank!

I'm sorry you had a horrible
brain in you for a while.

But look at it this way.

That poor guy is stuck
with that brain forever.

Mario, Mario!

I don't care what they
say about your brain,

I love all of it!

Welcome back, welcome back!

[thunder clap]

Talk to me, talk to me.

You're the best
brother in the world.

That's the Mario I love.

Keep talking.

Keep talking.

I love you.

Until next time, everybody!

Do the Mario!

♪ Do the Mario! ♪

♪ Swing your arms
from side to side, ♪

♪ come on, it's time to go! ♪

♪ Do the Mario! ♪

♪ Take one step,
and then again. ♪

♪ Let's do the Mario,
all together now! ♪

♪ You've got it! ♪

♪ It's the Mario! ♪

♪ Do the Mario! ♪

♪ Swing your arms
from side to side, ♪

♪ come on, it's time to go! ♪

♪ Do the Mario! ♪

♪ Take one step,
and then again. ♪

♪ Let's do the Mario,
all together now! ♪

♪ ♪ Come on now, it's
just like that! ♪ ♪