02x33 - House of Helmut / Supermodels

[bunniefuu]

♪ We are splitsboro kids


♪ And we go to sidekick school


♪ Learning to be second best


♪ While playing by the rules


♪ Maxum man is missing


♪ Now we rule the school


♪ Flyin', smashin', bashin' stuff ♪


♪ And lookin' super cool


♪ I'm a sidekick, sidekick


♪ That's the life for me


♪ Half-sized superzeros


♪ With full-sized hero dreams


♪ I'm a sidekick, sidekick


♪ What an awesome gig


♪ Just like superheroes (just like superzeroes)


♪ But only half as big


♪ Sidekick!


♪♪♪


Pamplemoose now we demonstrate ze proper method


Of catching expl*sive projectiles in ze teeth, ja?


Eric wait! Isn't there another way?


Ja, there is another way.


Phew!


But we'll have to flip you over.


What?!


Who says school isn't fun?


(Giggles)


(Phone rings)


Go for pample!


An emergency blind date?


You have no other options?


So you're stuck with me no matter what.


I'm your half-man!


Yeeeee-haaaw!


(Glass shatters)


(Spritzing)


Ahhhhhh!


(Groans)


(Menacingly) but first I must fix one little problem.


(Gulps)


(Loud thunderclaps)


Eric house-sitting?!


That's what pamplemoose wants us to do


While he's on his blind date?


Vana eww! This house looks like it smells


Like it tastes like barf!


Pamplemoose ah! I see you are admiring my home, ja?


I inherited it from my great-grandfather,


Helmut pamplemoose.


(Howls)


In fact, sometimes late at night,


He still wanders through ze halls...


Well, gotta go!


I'll be back by morning.


(Whirring)


Kitty hey! What are you doing?


I know you will want to order pizza.


I detest pizza stains!


Oh, man! Now I totally want pizza!


He was kidding about his grandfather's ghost, right?


He doesn't really walk the halls.


Awww!


Poor widdle ewik isn't afwaid of ghosts, is he?


It all started on my birthday at the orphanage...


Here comes the mouth diarrhea.


(Deep inhale)


Booo!


Aghhhhhhh!


(Crying)


I still say a birthday clown is more traditional.


Eric, ghosts aren't real.


Zombies, vampires, and werewolves,


Now those are real.


But ghosts?


Pfft! Grow up.


(Animal howls nearby, trevor whimpers)


(Loud howl)


(Door slams)


(Yawns)


Pamplemoose house rules:


No exploring, no touching,


No running, no walking, no sitting,


No poking anything with sticks...


This thing is pages long!


Trevor I'm bored!


Let's touch and poke things with sticks


While running!


(Giggles)


Yaaaaaaa!


I'm riding an ottoman!


What's an ottoman?


(Chuckles)


(Loud crash, groans in pain)


(Groaning and wincing) your turn, eric!


It's totally safe!


Whaaa-aggghhhh!


(Clock chimes loudly) ghost!


Eric, that was the clock.


Eric oh, right. Ha ha.


I'm so not completely terrified.



One totally harmless clock-slide coming up!


Agggggghhhhh!


(Crash) agh!


(Clock chimes and splashes) oops.


Think pamplemoose will notice?


Nah. That'll buff right out.


Hey, there's a pool down there!


(Chuckles) good thing I brought my trunks.


How did you know to wear a swimsuit?


I didn't.


I was out of clean underwear today.


And yesterday. And every day.


You coming, eric?


I don't have any trunks.


Just borrow some of pamplemoose's.


(Deep inhale)


(Splash)


Who would want to swim in that?


Trevor cannonball!


(Screaming, sludge splatters)


(Humming)


You realize I'm going to have to pummel you, right?


That sounds fair.


Kitty (blood-curdling scream)


What?! What's wrong?!


(Blood-curdling scream)


What? I guess pamplemoose likes thongs.


That's not a thong!


It's his spare eye patch!


That explains why it's so tight.


Aghhh!


Oops!


(Gasp)


Aghhhhhh!


Trevor pamplemoose sure has some weird stuff in his fridge.


This ooze? Delicious!


I doubt I'll ever... Get my appetite back.


I said I was sorry about the thong!


Sorry's not gonna put the puke back in my stomach, eric!


Ah, stomach puke...


That must be pamplemoose's mom.


Or dad. Or dog.


So lifelike.


Even the nose hairs look real!


(Inhales)


(Chuckles)


Hey, guys, check out this sculpture!


What're you talking about?


Huh? But it was...


Wait a second... (Gasps) gh-gh...


I think I just saw pamplemoose's grandfather's ghost!


Vana again? I know you're starved for attention-


That may be true, but I'm telling the truth!


I saw grandpa helmut!


You believe me, don't you, kitty?


I believe in you, eric.


There's a difference.


We already told you,


There's no such thing as ghosts!


(Sighs) maybe you're right.


It just seemed so real.


The waxy skin, the yellow teeth...


(Sniffs) I can still smell


The sour stink of his ghost breath.


Man, my imagination is really working overtime.


Eric...


(Groans)


Eric!


There's that crazy imagination again.


Eric, we see it too!


You do?


Eric, that's a real ghost!


(Drool drips heavily, ghost groans)


Gross.


Oh, right...


And ruuuuuuuuuun!


(Grunts)


(Gasps) we're trapped!


We're stuck here with the ghost?


A big, scary, gonna-eat-us ghost!


What are we gonna do?! What are we gonna do?!


(Hard slap)


(Sighs) thanks for calming me down.


Yeah... That's why I slapped you.


Look, we'll be fine as long as we stick together, right?


Vana and kitty (screaming)


(Ghostly groans and moans)


Eric and trevor (frightened screams)


Ahhhhhhh!


(Objects clunk)


(Pig squeals)


Unnngghhh!


Done!


No way he's getting through that,


Right, trevor?


(Snoring)


(Snoring)


Ahem! Trevor!


Aaaggghhhhhh! What?!


How can you sleep with a ghost out there?



He's from beyond the grave, trevor!


Beyond the grave!


Dude, relax!


If he's a ghost,


He can't touch you, right?


Hey, you're right!


(Door handle jiggles, eric whimpers)


We barricaded the closet, didn't we?


It would appear so.


(Ghostly moans)


Wait! If he's a ghost,


How can he turn the doorknob?


Can't talk, screaming.


(Screaming)


(Grunts of effort)


(Ghostly moans)


(Click)


(Doors whir open)


Aghhhh! Oof!


What are you guys doing here?


What does it look like?


We're hiding from the ghost!


Then you can relax; we left him in our dust.


(Ghostly moans)


He must have followed eric's trail of scaredy farts!


Trevor, that's (fart) not (fart) true!


(Fart)


(Sidekicks scream, ghost moans)


(Screaming)


(Ghostly moans)


Aghhh!


(Screaming)


(Screaming, ghostly moans)


Kitty wait!


No running by the pool.


(Ghostly moans)


(Screaming)


(Panting)


(Gulps)


Aghhhh!


(Ghostly moans)


(Panting)


Are you sure he can't get up here?


Duh! Ghosts can't climb, remember?


Right! But can't they fly?


How should I know? What am i, a bumble bee?!


(Screaming)


The girls are in trouble!


We have to do something!


Got it!


Unnngghhh!


(Screaming)


(Splat)


Oops.


No one hurts vana or katy!


Kitty.


Whatever.


I'm coming, vana!


(Chandelier twinkles)


What are you doing?


I'm gonna unhitch this chain,


Use it to swing across the room,


Grab the girls, and swing back to safety!


Agggghhhhhhhh!


(Loud, shattering crash)


(Coughing)


Quick! Wrap him in chains,


Roll him up in the carpet,


And toss him in the freezer!


(Grunts of effort)


(Laughs)


Kitty the sun's coming up!


Yeaaaaa!


(Groans)


Kitty it's morning!


Pamplemoose (humming)


Good morning, children!


I trust your night was as vonderbar as mine, ja?


Did helmut give you any trouble with his pills?


With his what?


His pills.


He always needs help with the child-proof cap.


It's on my list!


Did you not see it?


So helmut's not... A ghost?


A ghost? As if!


His heart's as strong as a horse.


In fact, it is the heart of a horse.


Now, where is he?


Quick! Wrap him in chains,


Roll him up in the carpet,


And toss him in the freezer!


Pamplemoose agggghhhhhh!


(Loud thunderclaps)


Pamplemoose (screaming)


♪♪♪


Eric no. No.


No. No.


None of these shirts look right.


Maybe my hair's the problem!



(Whirring)


Oh! That's not right either!


(Yawning) eric!


What is it that you are doing so late...


And so annoyingly?


Don't start, brain.


Tomorrow's picture day!


And I've never had a good yearbook photo ever.


Ever!


(Heart-wrenching sobs)


Is having just one good yearbook picture


Too much to ask for?!


Okay! Sorry! I was just trying to-


Well, things are gonna change this year!


It's my first picture at the academy


And it has to be perfect!


Perfect hair, perfect outfit...


Aren't you having only one outfit?


Pfft! No!


Why would you-? Ha!


One outfit! Pshaw!


You're crazy, brain!


(Door slams)


All right, eric,


Let's get beautiful!


(Straining grunts, squeaking)


Agghhhh!


(Ticking and beeping)


(Fizzling)


(Glass shatters)


(Squeaking)


(Gasps)


Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.


You're doing it all wrong.


Okay, so, now, look up.


Don't move!


Hmm... Ugh! You're moving!


You don't want a unibrow.


(Approaching footsteps)


(Loud thunderclap)


(Blood-curdling screams)


Oh, it's you.


Did you get the stuff?


(Trunk rasps across the floor)


Phew!


Agh! One bucket paint...


Oil based.


One industrial steamer,


Ten avocados, one blowtorch.


(Flames roar) aghhh!


One pot oatmeal,


One honeycomb... With bees,


One cheese grater, one drum motor oil,


And three orinoco river electric eels.


(Electricity fizzles) ow!


Orinoco? Aggghhh!


I asked for amazon, kitty!


People have come to expect a certain calibre of photo


From me each year,


And you bring me orinoco eels?!


Ugh! They'll have to do!


Aghhhhh!


Time to lock and load, needles.


Just remember, when in doubt... Fierce!


Just one final touch.


(Squirts)


Ah, bacon grease...


Delicious and functional.


(Squirts)


Just pray you are not running into any bonobo monkeys.


They are mortal enemies with all cured meat.


Hah! What are the chances of that?


(Angry monkeys screech, eric screams)


(Knocking)


Hey, man.


Trevor, what happened to your face?


What? Oh ho-ho-ho...


You mean the fact that it's horribly m*nled?


It's the boxing buddy!


All the fun of boxing


Without ever having to throw a punch!


It's awesome!


(Repeated punching) hee hee hee hee hee!


(Grunting and laughing, groans)


Don't take this the wrong way, but that is...


The coolest thing I've ever seen!


Let me!


Wait. I can't.


Today, my face will remain goose egg free!


I gotta go!


So... Pretty sweet, right?


Eric? Oof!


(Torch hisses)


(Humming)


That's it! You're done!


(Heavenly choir sings)


Hunh!


Kitty, I think this is the best makeover


I've ever had...


I mean, by an amateur, of course.



Of course.


Yeah, and that little bit of attitude


Just cost you your tip!


I'm so excited about this photo!


(Grunts) okay! It's my turn!


Hardly. We're gonna be late.


But...


B-b-but what about my face?


Here's a moist towelette. Clean yourself up a bit.


It is picture day, you know.


(Frustrated growl)


(Relaxed sigh) looking good.


(Ping)


Better take care of the 'do though.


(Humming)


(Angry monkeys screech)


Aghhhhh!


Where did they even come from?


(Panting)


Whoa! Oof!


(Angry monkeys screech)


I think I lost them. (Approaching beep)


Hiding in garbage, huh?


Well, at least things can't get any worse.


(Whirring and rumbling) aghhhhhh!


Okay, now things can't get any worse.


(Angry monkeys screech) aghhhhhh!


You know, kitty, that was a tough morning,


But totally worth it.


If I pass out,


Please try not to let me swallow my tongue, okay?


Trevor it's no use!


I'm not gonna make it.


Kitty trevor! Are you okay?!


Yeah, fine... Why?


Vana you picked a good day to stop a speeding locomotive


With your face.


What's that thing under your arm?


Something cool, and it's mine!


(Snarls)


Let me see!


(Grunts of effort)


Ha! Now... What's this do?


Oof! Agh.


(Moans)


How much you want for that thing?


(Monkeys screech)


I knew wearing a maxum second skin suit


Was a good idea.


(Sighs)


Now if I can just make it through the school


It'll be girl-face, pretty-boy-eric photo time.


(Content chuckle)


Whoa!


Eric needles!


To where might you be scurrying


Looking so... (Grunting sound)


Allan amazing!


Come on, it's picture day!


Ah, but that is precisely why I must stop you.


What?


Well, I'm the top dog here in the looks department.


And even though you have made only a teeny, tiny,


Minute, microscopic,


Very slight improvement in your appearance,


It's in the extremely


Good looking person's honour code


That I must assert my dominance


Over my obviously inferior opponent.


Wha?


Pummelling, eric.


I'm going to pummel you and ruin your picture day.


Oh! Okay...


I have no idea what you're talking about.


That is okay, my friend.


You will.


(Grunts)


(Gasps)


A nuclear plasma disrupter!


Nope.


(Multiple gasps) an intense burst microwave emitter!


Worse - an ultra soak !


A squirt g*n? That's not so bad.


Full of extra stainey grape juice!


(Double gasp)


(Coughs) sorry.


(Sharp gasp)


(Longer gasp)


(Trigger creaks)


(Squirt g*n powers up and blasts)


(Splat)


Oh! My picture is... Is ruined.


Avenge me!


I'm fake dead.


Nooooooooooo!


Monster!


And now, eric- hold on one sec.


You can kiss your yearbook photo goodbye.


(Squirting)


(Multiple splats)



Not this time!


Aghhhh!


Agh!


(Squirting)


(Slow-motion) noooo!


(Squirting)


(Grunts of effort)


(Slow-motion) nooooo!


(Trigger clicks)


(Grunts with the effort of reloading)


(Battle cry)


(Panting) so close...


Just a few more steps.


Ooooh... You almost made it.


So sorry, my friend.


Nothing truly says ruined like a grape juice stain.


(Gasps)


Sorry, allan,


There's a new sheriff in picture town,


And I'm gonna have to ask you to grease and desist!


(Squirts)


What is this? (Sniffs) bacon?!


It's a little gross,


But how is this supposed to stop me?


(Angry monkey screeches) oh no!


Sic 'im, boys!


Aggghhhhh! No!


It's picture time!


Eric needles is here!


Take my picture.


Cheese.


Hold on one sec! I want this to be perfect.


There. Much better.


Wait. Wasn't there a reason not to use this stuff?


(Monkeys screech)


Oh. Right.


Aghhhhhhh!


I've been waiting three months for this!


Now let's look at some yearbook pictures!


All (laughing)


Oh, man!


That's not seriously what I look like, is it?


All (laughing)


Vana well, at least my picture


Can't be any worse than trevor's.


His face looked like a rump roast that day.


All (stunned gasps)


Think they missed my good side.


But... How?!


I slipped the photographer a fiver


For some "super airbrushing."


I'm surprised you guys didn't think of that.


(Moan turns into a really angry groan)


(Kettle whistles)


Aghhhhh! (Crash)


Moment of truth!


I can't look!


(Pig squeals)


Oh, come on. It can't be that bad!


(Gasps)


I don't believe it.


Best picture ever! (Echoes)