02x40 - Of Mouse and Mel / Iron Sidechef

[bunniefuu]

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just like superheroes

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[Applause]

sidekick slideshow

i can't believe that all i had to do was

call 24 hours a day for seven straight

weeks to get us on the show

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this is the best show ever and now

your host walter ego

it's sidekick sideshow where sidekicks

compete for the right to be named

sidekick champion or get eaten by mutant

sharks cloned by really evil

geniuses

[Applause]

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now let's meet today's shark bait

our first layer is eric needles sidekick

to the great

maxum man

tell us about that that's right walt one

day

that's just great and now let's meet

this lovely

oh who cares we all know why we're here

let's

start the brutality

you know the rules sidekicks must

survive all our super challenges

and they never do we'll start the

destruction after a message from

evil cola it's now made with

real panda tears

[Applause]

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i can't wait to win this imagine

sidekick

champion you

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maybe i'll let you applaud when i win

maybe

oh yeah well i've seen this show like a

gajillion times

and i'm gonna be top sidebar

[Laughter]

what about you kitty i'd just like to

see us all compete honorably

and made the best she's doomed totally

even i have more of a chance

we're back let's begin with a little

challenge i like to call

sink or spin

oh wow i know this one first we get spun

then we jump across those rocks through

mutual shark infested waters where we

either ring the bell

and live or we fall in the water and die

uh in the game i mean yes

in the game well thank you kitty

aren't you eager now let's start the

psychic

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sideshow

oh watch it needles i don't want any

puke on me when i'm cramped

sidekick champ

sounds like it's time for part two

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no i won't fail 10 years of super ballet

have totally prepared me for this

super ballet try 10 years of tap on for

size

[Applause]

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[Applause]

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i'm one step closer to sidekick champion

and leaving you

come on eric let's show her what we can

do

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i can't my championship dreams are

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over

time is running out looks like we might

eliminate two sidekicks at once

that's double the fun oh no you won't

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hmm

you did it buddy i didn't

i did it who did it

i don't know what to say i couldn't have

done it without you

you saved me oh eric

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thanks kathy what it is

welcome back to round two everyone knows

sidekicks make amazing projectiles

so let's play

the rules are simple you drop down

through the obstacles and try to reach

the safe landing area to advance to the

next round

fail and you fall into a demon dimension

sidekicks

my ready totally worth it

winning this show is going to be even

better than pizza

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don't worry he didn't mean it

this is gonna be so easy

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[Applause]

perfect what else would you expect from

the perfect sidekick

just give me the championship now walt

it's mine

are you sure oh man

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[Applause]

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she knows my name wait for me

huh well that was unexpected well it's

all come down to this

for the first time ever we may be about

to crown our

sidekick psycho champion eric needles

is only one challenge away from victory

eric welcome to the

lightning round

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an empty room i live in the maxim

mansion

i go through bigger empty rooms all the

time

the rules are simple just cross the

finish line and win

so why is it called a lightning round

walt

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i see what you did there sidekick

ready

blindly has never failed you before

i get it

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congratulations eric how does it feel to

be our first

ever sidekick sideshow sidekick champion

it feels great well let's see what we

can do about that

activate the sidekick sideshow

teleporter

a teleporter wow

my friends are in chains this looks

suspiciously like a dungeon rather than

a glitzy award show

the host of the show just stormed in

carrying a huge w*apon

which he is aiming at

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sorry to disappoint sidekick but there

is no

ceremony no award and thanks to you

no more walter ego

sucks being a super villain was all the

practice i needed to be a game show host

it was the perfect plan lure you

simple-minded sidekicks to your doom

well i entertained the masses and basked

in the fame and glory of celebrity

and it worked until you stumbled your

way to victory and

ruined it all goodbye sidekick

wait uh how about you host a new show

with a twist welcome back

to evil henchmen sideshow

where evil knockies get blown up over

and over again for no reason

at all now let's get this sideshow

started

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more mindless v*olence what is the world

coming to

hey give the audience what it wants and

you can't go wrong this is the best show

ever

totally see

remember you too can be a contestant

just dial 555

total evil call now

hey i have an idea we should totally go

on that show

i can't believe you trevor just idea

let's be worse faster are you going to

stop him or should i

well let's see where this goes

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we all like cartoon animals kitty but

that's a bit much

it's not the cartoon my personal spy

satellite

just spotted joshua's sideburns and he's

here

he's my super biggest mega crush ever

oh eric i still like you too wow so

awkward

what's awkward now

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joshua sideburns hello person who helped

me with security on my last film

uh other person girl person

scary girl person a personal anti-fan

force field

well played sir but i won't be stopped

that easily

[Laughter]

you are so embarrassing i breathe

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i must say that was very impressive

yeah i get that a lot

you are such a summer

so are you in splitsboro to sh**t

another teen mummy movie

no i've outgrown those silly roles i'm

branching out into

serious acting

joshua sideburn saves the world hard in

this summer's wildest blockbuster

maxim boogaloo it will be a huge action

movie

but with heart i'll be portraying maxum

man the greatest hero the world has

ever known cool

and that is why i am here i want to

train at maxum man's side

i want to know what makes a hero d*ck i

want to slip into his life like a warm

bath and swim in his soothing waters

so easy around or what um if i

understand correctly

and i rarely do you're looking for maxum

man but um

he's away and won't be back four hours

cheers no uh daves hey eric i have a

great idea

i thought you might if maxum man is away

again then why don't you train joshua

huh joshua likes what

no i can't train him why not you're

maxum man's

best bud you must know all about him

right

what are you saying vanna are you trying

to imply that my life is a sham

uh that i don't have the faintest idea

about the man who i claim is my super

uh that i've never even met him is that

what you're trying to say

fine don't train him then oh you'd like

that wouldn't you

well i am so training him i will train

joshua

like no joshua has ever been trained

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before

all right that did not go as planned

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okay so as your first official uh

how to be maxum man lesson i thought we

should start um

with a classic thing that uh maxum man

does

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hey check it out

that's not even a thing boo in front

no i was hoping for something a little

more slippery

and a lot less creepy ooh

i know you should show joshua how maxum

pam flies

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trevor i got it

and i'm totally answering the door and

not stalling

hello may i uh help you

i'm a successful and glamorous movie

star person who is looking for

joshua's sideburns

oh joshua darling

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charmed i'm sorry have we met

of course we've met

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that was amazing say how would you like

to be my new bodyguard

will i get to watch eric make a fool of

himself training you

of course i'm in now

let's try that flying thing

the wind always looks so great blowing

through my hair

joshua this isn't real none of us have

superpowers so we can't

fly i found these rocket packs in the

evil gadget room

maxim flight training it is

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come on eric i want to see some of maxum

man's amazing super maneuvers

yeah come on eric fly

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[Applause]

now this is more like it go eric

come on

now this is super i must have

more of this maximum experience where's

eric where's my super trainer

that was amazing i feel so

powerful so so super

what a rush the power the skin-tight

suit

i truly am maxum man

you mean you're an actor pretending to

be maxum man

huh yeah yeah of course yeah of course

pretending

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where is maxum man sucks

i got this invitation from maxum man to

a battle royale and

who am i to turn that down you invited

zox to a battle

of course i did what better way to show

that i've truly become maxum man than by

defeating my greatest nemesis in a fair

fight i keep telling you you're not

maxum man

you're a movie star with makeup

those muscles are foam rubber whoa

that hair is well the hair is totally

great as always

oh yeah dreamy perfect

whoa but you are not a superhero and zox

is gonna destroy you

stand aside sidekick and let maxum man

handle this

do your worst zox i can't watch

me either kitty

this is gonna be so good

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say goodbye maxum man

oh hang on talk to me yup

uh-huh uh-huh really you don't say

okay well uh this has been swell really

really fun

but we've got to head back to the studio

studio

we oh we start sh**ting the maxum man

movie today everyone say hello to my

fabulous co-star mr taylor chincleft

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i told you to stay down he'll be playing

socks in my movie and we were rehearsing

rehearsing this was awesome elaborate

hollywood lie

pretty much yes you didn't think we'd

really fight and damage

these did you

thank you eric you were a great super

trainer

you really made me feel like a hero well

thank you for coming into my life again

and destroying everything

anytime let's roll

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yes

what kind of ending was that there was

all this build up and then

nothing well trevor sometimes real life

doesn't have a hollywood ending

really sucks again

that's right sidekick you might be a

good guy superhero trainer

but who do you think hollywood comes to

when they want a super villain trainer

now since i'm here anyway prepare to be

destroyed

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now this is more like it

goes

yeah i'd pay money to see this