01x01 - Adventures of a Normal Man (part 1)

[bunniefuu]

Hey, you gotta slow down!

There's a big pothole up there.

I know. Give me just a few more minutes,

and we'll be
at Grandpa's house.

Whoa!

What? Uh...

Whoa!

How am I doing this?

Who am I?

Clark. Alarm.

Ha!

It's today.

Uh...

It's today.

Hello, sir.

Hi, Mr. White.

Uh, okay. Shake gently.
Do not crush his hand.

Hey, Clark?

I gotta pee.

Today, just be normal.
Today, just...

Be extraordinary!

Mr. White. Thank you
for calling me in today,

because I've got
one heck of a story for you.

Pew-pew!

No, don't do that to your boss.

I'm Clark Kent...

...and this is a dream
come true.

Shoes.

This is it. This is the story
that'll make you a real reporter.

You can do this.

I can do this.

I'm gonna hide my powers and be a
normal man having a normal day.

Starting now.

Okay, I had to save the cat.
I had to save the cat.

I'm a normal man having a
normal day, starting now.

Oh!

Hi, there. After... you.

Thanks.

See you in there, big guy.

Hey.

Uh, uh... Hello.

Hey.

- Uh, my name is...
- Clark!

Oh,
those repairs you did

on the back door
are wonderful.

Ooh, and I have
the three dozen donuts

you wanted to eat
all ready to go.

Such
a good appetite, this one.

No, see, it's...
It's not all for me.

But he gets
the sprinkles all over.

That's why
we made him the bib.

Uh... Well, it's... Today's my
first day of work and I'm...

Honey, Clark is here.

Good man! Get his bib?

Thank you.

Well, now you've...

- seen me in a bib.
- Uh-huh?

So, I'm, uh, just gonna leave before
this gets any worse. Goodbye forever.

Uh, sorry.
I'll fix the front door later!

I can't believe we're late.

I can't believe
our alarm clock exploded again.

Why do you think
that keeps happening?

So, hey! Our... Our...
Our first day at the Daily Planet.

- You nervous?
- Ha! I am pumped.

It's Kent and Olsen,
uncovering truths.

Wait! Uh, Jimmy...

Like the fact that
aliens walk among us.

And there it is.

Aliens, Loch Ness, Bigfoot...

...that one psychic starfish from Germany.

It's all real.

And with my keen eye for observation,
huh, I'll get the proof.

Don't worry.

I'll tell our boss all of this
the instant we meet him.

Jimmy...

I'm just gonna
cut him off and say...

Stolen m*llitary robots

are being hidden here in Metropolis...

- ...and I've got the scoop.
- Lane.

Mt. Simonson Base
is the inventory warehouse

for experimental
m*llitary projects,

and a day ago they got robbed.

The only road out
leads through Metropolis,

which means thieves
with dangerous w*r machines

are loose in our city.

People need to know about this.
So...

Ready for me
to bust the story wide open?

No. Lois, you're an intern.

The only reason I called you
in today was to meet them.

- Hi.
- You?

- You.
- These are the new interns.

I want you to show them
the ropes and get...

They can help me
with the story.

Oh, have you considered
that these robots

might have come from
beyond the stars?

Uh, they came
from an army base.

There's only so many places
to hide them.

I've already got a lead.

It could be
the sewer dinosaurs.

- So we follow up...
- Moth Man.

Meet my source...

Merpeople! Merpeople!

- Find the robots...
- And get the story.

Then what are we
waiting around here for?

Uh, donut, Mr. White?

Chief?

New interns, out.
Old intern, stay.

You do not report the news.
You do not leave this building.

Your job is to teach the interns how
to scan things and make coffee.

That's it.

- Mr. White, for the good of Metropolis...
- For the good of me,

you need to stop coming in
with these wild ideas.

Do what I tell you to do.

Lane, this is your last chance.

Are you okay?

I can apologize to Mr. White,
if... if that'll help.

Are you kidding?

He kept me behind
because he wants you

to help me follow up
on my stolen robot story.

Really?
He seemed pretty upset.

Nah, that's just his face.

You wanna impress Mr. White,
this is our chance.

Let's go.

- You like her.
- No. What?

I mean, I...
I admire Miss Lane.

Yeah, you do.

As professionals, Jimmy.
Professionals.

Well, come on, Kent.

Just take a risk. What's the
worst that could happen?

Don't touch that.

What took you so long, Willis?

The crew was getting restless.

Our fence wasn't
at the drop point.

We have no buyer.

- What the...
- It gets better.

Every buyer, fixer, or fence in
Metropolis has just disappeared on us.

We're stuck here.

Leslie, we can't just sit
in a warehouse

full of freaky stolen science
weapons till the cops show up.

We don't even know
what half this stuff is.

- What are we going to do?
- I don't know, Badger.

Why don't we panic real loud
in front of the thieves

and K*llers we hired for this job?

What we need to do is keep moving.

If we can find a way out of town, then I...

Which one of you messed
with the robot?

Mmm. Looks like Brad.

Listen up, people.

We've hit a snag
in the operation.

Do what I say
and we can still get paid.

Fail to do so
and you end up like Brad.

Suit up and load the trucks.
Time for Plan B.

- What are we doing?
- We're meeting my important

and very serious
journalistic source.

Flip Johnson,
woman of business.

This is precious.

Flip is one of the Planet's
newspaper delivery kids.

We call ourselves
the Newskid Legion.

- And because they...
- I'm the leader.

And because they see
everything during their routes,

they always know
what's happening in the city.

Flip, these robots
would have been...

Ms. Lane, while I appreciate
your past English tutoring,

it's bad business
to hand out freebies.

I need something in return.

- Like what?
- I'm glad you asked.

We need your help
with The Newskid Newspaper.

The Newskid Newspaper

is the latest from us,

the people on the street.

Big Words does the puzzle.

Gaby does the op-ed.

Patti does the cartoons,

but only because Mom says
we have to be nice to her.

And I'm the editor.

We want Perry to let us
deliver our paper with his.

So, if you were to ask for us,

and maybe also help me on my
next three English essays...

- One essay.
- Two, and there will be snacks.

Deal.

Okay, in the last hours,
a water main burst at the bank,

they got rats
over at Bogdanov's diner,

Mrs. Jurgens eloped with the
superintendent.

Gaby saw a bunch of trucks
running a red light.

And I saw a weird pigeon.
It was gross.

- Wait, were they garbage trucks?
- Yeah. Why?

Hmm. If I had to transport
stolen goods through the city...

I'd find a way
to do it in plain sight.

Okay. Where did you guys
see the trucks?

And where exactly
did you see them disappear?

Uh, wait. Lois, this is
starting to feel dangerous

for you and Jimmy.
And, uh, to me, too.

Are you sure that Mr. White is
okay with us following this?

Oh.

Yeah,
that was him just now. Uh...

He said he can't wait
to see our story.

Ooh! Over here. Over here.

We have to get inside.

- Boost me up.
- Uh, what?

Just lift me up.

You're, like, twice my size.
You can definitely...

Are you okay?

- Yeah, I'm... Uh, I'm...
- Guys!

We don't have to go through
the window, or whisper.

The door's unlocked.

Oh, that's not good.

No!

The robots should be here.

Look around.
There has to be something.

Oh, look!

"PM."

PM could be initials, like...

Paranormal Meta-sapiens!

It's the term for
the super-intelligent gorillas

France has been hiding.

- Maybe part of a uniform.
- A French one.

- It's not gorillas.
- I know what I'm talking about.

- And it's not Merpeople.
- PM.

- And it's definitely...
- Uh, hello? Clark Kent here.

I know
Lane is dodging me,

so I'm gonna tell you
what I texted her.

All three of you need to get
back to the Planet right now,

or don't bother
coming back at all.

Port of Metropolis.

This is from
a dockworker's jacket.

They're moving
the robots to the docks.

Come on, we can catch them,

- and then we can...
- Perry just called.

Lois, you lied.

I mean, technically, yes,
but you wouldn't have helped me

- if I told the truth.
- You didn't give us the chance.

Because this was too important.

The people of Metropolis
need to know

what's happening
in their city, and...

This isn't about the city,
Lois, it's about you.

I trusted you,
and you used me and Jimmy

just so you could get
your story.

Come on, Clark. We're a team.

We're not a team.

We're just two dummies
who listened to you

because we didn't know
any better.

Now we do.

Fine. I don't need
your help anyway.

Oh!

I can't believe him.

What is wrong with your dumb,
beautiful, coward of a best friend?

Clark's just... You know,
he just grew up in a...

Wait, did you say "beautiful"?

And then he says
I'm the selfish one.

- Hmm.
- I mean, yes, I lied.

But he wouldn't have helped me
unless I had.

Not like he helped
that old lady with the bib,

or... or helped me with Flip,

or... or brought
everyone doughnuts,

- or... I was being selfish.
- Uh, Lois?

- I got him fired from his dream job.
- Lois!

All to chase a bunch of robots

- that might not even be in the city anymore?
- Lois!

Whoa!

We found the robots.

And the people
who stole them.

Huh? Hey!

Someone take care of this.

Why would you use the robot?

Clark!
Lois was right.

Ugh. I know. She did lie,
but would I have helped her

if she told me the truth?

I... I don't think I would.

- And what does that say about me?
- Not that!

Lois and Jimmy found the robots
and the robots turned on them.

What do we do?
Should we call Perry?

The President? My mom?

Clark?

Okay. I think we lost them.

Clark, you came back.

I... We... We...
We have to go get Jimmy.

Guys! Run!

Clark!

- Ahh!
- Clark!

No!

Huh?

Well, I didn't plan for this.

Badger, I need you to...

Fine, new plan.

Huh.

Lois.

Lois.

Lois! No!

Hello?

Who are you?

Clark!

A normal man
having a normal day, huh?

- Who am I?
- Clark!

Clark!

Clark! Clark!

I'm sorry I lied.
You were right.

I was being selfish,
and you just left us.

But you came back, and...
and I'm sorry.

Clark?

Clark!

You're okay!

Jimmy, please
tell me you got that.

Every second of it.

I have pictures of a man
flying through the air.

He's gotta be an alien.

Everything I've ever
believed in is real!

Uh, you...
You got pictures of the fight?

This is the story
of the century.

Stolen m*llitary robots,
taken down by a Superman.

Oh, when we show this
to Perry, he's gonna say...

This is garbage.

Mr. White, this is gold.

What you brought me
is a bunch of blurry pictures

- of robots falling.
- Phew.

What on earth
were you thinking?

And you dragged
my brand new interns into this.

It's the truth.

Lois was right
about the robots,

and we all stand by
the story we broke,

because we're a team.

Uh, sir.

All the interns out.

Go. I'll figure out
what to do with you tomorrow.

We're not fired?

Does that mean
you'll run our story, Chief?

I'll run your story on the day
you get me a photo sh**t

with your very real
"Flying Man."

Now, out!

Hmm.

- Lois?
- Whoo! This is great.

We just have to get an exclusive
interview with Superman,

and then Mr. White
will have to take us seriously.

- That's your takeaway from all this?
- Yup!

And... And I promise,
from now on, no more secrets.

You in, Clark?

- Of course, Lois.
- Yes!

And no matter where he goes,

no matter where he hides,
we will track Superman down

and force him
to tell us all his secrets.

And then we'll publish them.

This is
the best day of my life!