03x05 - A Penny for His Thoughts

[bunniefuu]

♪ Hello, world, hear
the song that we're singin'

♪ Come on, get happy

♪ A whole lot of lovin'
is what we'll be bringin'

♪ We'll make you happy

♪ We had a dream
we'd go travelin' together

♪ And spread a little lovin'
then we'd keep movin' on

♪ Somethin' always happens
whenever we're together

♪ We get a happy feelin'
when we're singin' a song

♪ Travelin' along there's
a song that we're singin'

♪ Come on, get happy

♪ A whole lot of lovin'
is what we'll be bringin'

♪ We'll make you happy

♪ We'll make you happy

♪ We'll make you happy ♪

Did you hear that?

Sounded like a flying saucer
landed in our front yard.

Well, if the person knocking
has green skin, it's for you.

What's going on?

It sounds like someone's
at the front door.

Really? How'd
you figure that out?

One thing's for sure,
he's not a sneak thief.

Maybe somebody's in trouble.

If they're not,
they're gonna be.

I'm coming.

Hey, hey! ¿Que pasa?

Snake!

Mom, you remember Snake.

How could I ever forget
a name like Snake?

Am I interrupting anything?

Our sleep. Do you
know what time it is?

It's about : in the morning.

It's :.

Hey, I made better
time than I thought!

Snake, it's late.

It's later than you think if you
happen to be a guy named Snake.

What's wrong?

I don't want to talk about it.

I just came to say goodbye.

Goodbye?

Goodbye.

Hey, now I know why you
don't use fingernail polish.

You keep your fingernails clean.

You're all the nicest
clean people I know.

That's why I came
to say goodbye.

I've already said goodbye
to all my greasy friends.

Snake, what are
you talking about?

I don't wanna burden you with
my problems. Can I have a beer?

We don't have any. So what?

Tell us about your problem.

Her is my problem.

Who's her?

Her is my girlfriend, one
Miss Penny Sweetweather.

I love her so much that I broke all
the rules. I asked her to marry me.

And what does she
do? She left me cold.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

I should've known it.
Penny's part Cherokee Indian.

What's that got to
do with anything?

She took everything from me.
First Alcatraz, then my heart.

A guy can't go on without his
heart, can he? So, right on. Goodbye.

Snake, what are you going to do?

The only thing
left for me to do.

I'm gonna go out and
kick my own bucket.

Thanks for the warmth.

Hey, clean hands, warm heart.

Mom, we can't let him go.

You don't really think
he's gonna do it, do you?

No, but we can't
take that chance.

I knew you'd come to save
me. You're clean people.

Oh, poor Snake.

You know, it was : in the
morning before he finally got to sleep.

Yeah, well, I didn't
get any sleep at all.

Why not?

Because Snake sleeps
with his eyes open.

And it makes me nervous when someone
snores and stares at me at the same time.

Where he hangs out,
that's a necessary talent.

I hope he's all right.

Probably shouldn't have
left him at home alone.

Well, Reuben's there. Besides,
he's probably still asleep.

I don't think so. Look.

They ran over my flowerbed!

Now, don't say anything to
them, Mom. These guys are rough.

They squashed my chrysanthemums!

Well, I'll fluff them up.

Hi.

What's going on?

We have company.

So I've noticed.

I thought it'd be a good idea to call
up Snake's g*ng and invite them over.

You know, to cheer him up.

Move!

And you twist his arm
until he cries "Uncle."

Uncle?

Uncle. Uncle.

Uncle!

Okay, everybody out.

Oh, man!

Okay, you guys heard the lady.

Everybody out.

Hey, Snake, if you can't figure a
way to snuff yourself out, give me a call.

I'll help you think
of something.

Hey, Gorgo, man, that's nice,
man, knowing somebody cares.

Well, they're all gone.

I'm gonna split, too. I gotta
ride up to San Francisco.

Why San Francisco?

Sentimental reasons. I'm gonna
jump off the building where I was born.

You can't hurt yourself
jumping out of a basement.

You know, just because
I'm passing myself on,

that doesn't mean that I
can't take someone with me.

Snake,

look, you're not gonna
jump off anything.

Be honest.

You know you're not
gonna kick your own bucket.

Yeah, you're right.

I'll just jump out of the
second story and break my leg.

Well, that's better.

You know, Snake,
you still haven't told us

what happened between
you and your girlfriend.

I don't know what happened. I mean,
we'd been riding together for two years.

She was always
bugging me to marry her.

And I finally asked her to
marry me. So what does she do?

She hung up on me.

She hung up on you?

You mean you proposed
to her over the phone?

Yeah. Why not?

Oh, Snake.

Well, Snake, you don't
propose to a girl over the phone.

A proposal is something that
should be very... Very intimate.

It was intimate.

All I was wearing was my shorts.

What Laurie means is, a
girl wants to be romanced.

A proposal is the most
important thing in a girl's life.

Proposing over the telephone
is, well, it's rather cold.

Yeah. Yeah, it was cold. I had goose
pimples. Well, I was only wearing...

I didn't mean that.

Snake, do you love this girl?

Yeah.

Then let her know it. Propose to her in
person. Show her how much you care.

Miss Partridge, can I talk to you
alone for a minute in the kitchen?

Well, sure.

I wonder what that's all about.

I think Snake wants to find
out how to treat a woman.

That's easy.

Oh? What do you do?

Punch them.

Maybe I'm just dumb.

But I just... What's wrong
with proposing over the phone?

Snake, it just
isn't very romantic.

A girl wants to be
proposed to in person.

It makes her feel like a woman.

Well, she knows she's a woman.

I wouldn't propose to no guy.

Snake...

Listen, Miss Partridge,
you got class.

You think you could teach me
enough class to get Penny to marry me?

Well, I don't know. Please!

Let me just practice proposing
with you till I get it right.

Well... Please.

They've been in
there a long time.

Well, you know
how those things go.

Quick, we gotta stop
him! Snake's freaked out!

I knew it. He pulled
a Kn*fe on her.

No. He asked Mom to
marry him and she said yes.

Oh, poor Snake. Mom
caught him on the rebound.

Traitors!

Mom, don't do it. You're
getting him on the rebound!

Mrs. Partridge,
if I get married,

am I gonna end up
with something like him?

I'll get it. I'll get it.

I'll get it.

I hate the seniority system.

Snake!

Hi. I just came by to show you what
I look like before I propose to Penny.

You like the threads?

You look fine.

Snake?

My proposing ensemble.

Hey, you look great.

Ah, thanks. I even
bought her some candy.

Oh, look on the handlebars. I thought
that'd be more original than flowers.

A potted palm.

Is that coconuts on it?

Yeah. If you're gonna
show a girl you love her,

you gotta give her
something big, right?

Yeah. She'll know that you went
out of your way to get that all right.

I think Penny will love it.

Boy, this is a
day I won't forget.

Because it was the
rottenest day of my whole life.

What happened?

I don't know what happened. I
went to her house, just like you said.

I knocked on the
door, just like you said.

When she opened it, I
proposed, just like you said.

And then she slammed the door
in my face, just like you didn't say.

Snake, I'm so sorry.

That's okay. It's no big thing.

Well, I'm glad to see you're
taking it this way, Snake.

After all, what's one girl, huh?

I mean, there are lots
of fish in the ocean, right?

Yeah, right. Right.

In fact, I think I'm gonna
go look up some of them fish.

That's more like it.

If anybody wants to find me,

I'll be in the San Francisco Bay

with a motorcycle
tied to my leg.

Let's go.

Hi. Hi.

Hi, Reuben. Come on in.

I saw Snake's bike out
front. How's he doing?

He's in the living room writing
a "goodbye cruel world" note.

Ah. And he's still
planning to... No.

We talked him out of that.

Now, he's gonna
drop out of society.

He's never been in society.

Well, he's dropping
out even more.

He's gonna become a hermit
and live in an igloo in Alaska.

Ah, that's too bad. Alaska
doesn't deserve that.

I'm having trouble formulating
my farewell message.

Well, why don't you
read us what you have?

Okay.

It says,

"Goodbye."

That's it?

Yeah, so far.

I was wondering if I ought
to capitalize "cruel world."

Oh, I would.

So would I.

Hey, Kincaid, first
time you were right.

You know, I think there's only one
way we're gonna be able to help Snake.

I'll get the rope.

I meant talk to his girlfriend.

Do you know how I can find her?

Well, her name is
Penny Sweetweather

and I think he said that she
works at Gilbo's Five-and-Dime.

That figures.

A girl named Penny would
have to work in a five-and-dime.

Five-and...

Well, I guess you have to be a
manager to understand a money joke.

Could you tell me where I might
find Miss Penny Sweetweather?

Oh, well, I'm Penny
Sweetweather.

I bet you're interested
in our new art collection.

This one is my favorite.

Central Park. See the mugger?

Penny, I came here
because of Snake.

Well, snakes are in the toy
department or the pet shop,

depending on whether
you want real or rubber.

Your Snake, Penny.

Sorry, I'm busy. But he
proposed to me over the phone.

He also proposed to
you again in person.

Sure, in a coat and tie.

I had to ask his name
before I recognized him.

He was putting me on.

I'm afraid the coat
and tie was my idea.

Say, are you his new old lady?

No. He's a friend of the family.

Penny, he really loves you.

Yeah?

Ah, it wouldn't work, anyway. I wanna
settle down, get a house, raise kids.

He's just not responsible. He
doesn't care about anything.

Well, he's back at my house
right now writing a farewell note.

A what?

He says if you won't marry him,

he's gonna become a hermit and
go and live in an igloo in Alaska.

He must love me.
He hates cold weather.

We gotta stop him
before he ruins his back.

What?

If he goes up there,
his water bed'll freeze.

Since Gorgo's my best friend,
I think I'll leave him my Kn*fe.

You don't wanna
live in an igloo.

You'll catch your death of cold.

Que sera sera.

Snake, don't do it! Penny!

Don't do it. I'm not worth it.

Hey! If I say you're
worth it, you're worth it.

You know, behind that clenched
fist, there's a beautiful person.

Maybe that's why I love you.

You do?

Would you marry me?

If you promise not
to freeze in Alaska.

You can't say "I do"
if you have lockjaw

all over.

Penny, this is the
happiest day of my life.

You know what I'm
gonna do? I'm gonna take

that mechanic's job
Bent Rentlow offered me.

You'd get a job for me?

Sure. I couldn't let
you marry a bum.

Besides, it's good pay. It's nearly
as much as I'd make stealing.

Oh, Snake.

Oh, Penny.

Oh, brother.

Mama, I have never seen anything
like this before in my entire life.

What kind of person is
my poor baby marrying?

Well, it's certainly not
a social step forward.

Hey, Laurie, I mean, it's really cool of
your old lady to let me have the wedding.

I mean, it's beautiful.

How do I look, huh?

Oh, you look great. I'm jealous.

No kidding?

No kidding.

You know when they throw
rice at you after the wedding?

Yeah? Mine's
gonna be soft-boiled.

Look at these people!

Oh, my poor baby.

I just hope the
wedding isn't raided.

It's -to-. Anybody else? All
right, you're on. You're covered. Fine.

Hey, I got you over there.
Anybody else? Step right up.

Hey!

I said no gambling
at my wedding.

Hey, I'm sorry, Snake.

He was just giving -to-
odds you'd chicken out.

You're kidding. I'll take
bucks of that action.

Snake...

It ain't gambling if you
know you're gonna win.

Snake, it's time.

Hey, did you see
the look on his face?

-to-! -to-!

-to-!

Really, it'll be a
nice short ceremony.

Good. Maybe it'll be over
before the riot breaks out.

Cool it! Cool it!

♪ Because you come to me

♪ With naught save love

♪ And hold my hand
and lift mine eyes above

♪ A wider world
of hope and joy I see

♪ Because you... ♪

Friends, loved ones,

and friends,

we are here to witness a young couple
engage in the holy bonds of matrimony.

The vows for this ceremony
were written by the groom.

By all that is holy and
true, I love you my dearest.

We are forever joined,

as the red skies of sunset are
joined to the pink clouds of sunrise.

We are ourselves, we
are together, we are one.

Do you, Penny Sweetweather,
take this man to be your husband?

I do.

And do you, Hayman
Timothy Goodroe,

take this woman to be your wife?

I do.

The ring.

Then you are,
forever, one person,

separate and together and one.

Well, where's the part about does
anyone here object to this marriage?

I had to invite them. I mean,
after all, they are my parents.

♪ I don't know,
but I've been told

♪ The streets of heaven
are paved with gold

♪ Someday I may
find out for myself

♪ So will you
♪ But till that day

♪ I've got to say ♪ Ooh

♪ Love must be the answer

♪ I've searched high and low

♪ I know love must be the answer

♪ You got it, you
get it ♪ Now let me be

♪ You got You get it, you got it

♪ Now let some love inside

♪ Are you searching for the key?

♪ Are you searching for the key?

♪ Just take my
hand and follow me

♪ Just take my
hand and follow me

♪ Bring along a
little love to share

♪ It'll get you there
♪ Why be lonely?

♪ You know only ♪ Ooh

♪ Love must be the answer

♪ I've searched high and low

♪ I know love must be the answer

♪ I got it, you get it

♪ Now let me be your guide

♪ You get it, you got it

♪ Now let some love inside

♪ La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la

♪ Love must be the answer

♪ La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la

♪ Love must be the answer

♪ La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la

♪ Love ♪ Love must be the answer

♪ Oh, love ♪

Well, I must say, I'm
glad they're married.

But I'm also glad it's over.

Yeah. Actually, I'm
kind of sorry it is over.

That reception was a classic.

Yeah, they got some
pretty neat gifts, too.

A pair of his and
hers brass knuckles.

Did you see what
Penny got for the kitchen?

A butcher Kn*fe with
notches carved in the handle.

Hi.

Hi, Gorgo. Come on in.

Hey, I wanna thank you for having
the wedding here. It was beautiful.

Yes, it turned out really nice.

Oh, yeah. I was moved.

Tears, actually... They
sprung to my eyes.

I haven't cried like that since Arny Kunkle
twisted my nose with a pair of pliers.

That's sweet.

Listen, the real reason I stayed
is, well, Snake's my best friend.

We grew up together. We
always did the same thing.

Oh?

Yeah. Even when we were kids.

I mean, I got the measles,
he got the measles.

I bought a motorcycle,
he bought a motorcycle.

I broke my leg, he broke my leg.

Gorgo, what are
you trying to say?

Since Snake got married, I
decided I'm gonna get married.

Hey, congratulations.
Who's the lucky girl?

I think you've met.

Mom, Keith.

Don't look at me. I think
you make a cute couple.

Gorgo, you can't marry Laurie.

Why?

Well, she doesn't love you.

She'll learn.

You don't wanna marry
her. She's too skinny.

Oh... Right. I... I'm skinny.

Couple of g*ng fights will
put a little muscle on you.

And ugly.

Right. Ugly as sin.
Runs in the family.

Hell, I can live with ugly.

Gorgo, as much as I'd
like to, I can't marry you.

I'm engaged to a policeman.

Don't worry, Gorgo.
You'll find some nice girl.

Sure.

Mrs. Partridge? Yes?

You look lonely. Out.