25x05 - Flying Saucer Daffy

[bunniefuu]

[♪♪♪]

♪ Hello ♪

♪ Hello ♪

♪ Hello ♪

ALL:
Hello.

[♪♪♪]

[SIGHS]

Boy, it's good
to be home.

Oh,
my darling sons.

How was
the track today?

Sloppy.

Sloppy? We ain't
had rain in weeks.

Oh, some sow slopped
beer in my hat.

Oh, I'll get Joe
to get you a new one.

Me too, Ma.

Hey, get this junk
off this table here.

Come on.

Watch what
you're doin'!

My sandwich
was in there!

Hey, get me
a drink, son.

Mm-hm. Here.

Water?!

Don't you never
do that to me again!

Oh,
here's Joe.

Good evening,
auntie dear.

Cousin Moe,
Cousin Larry.

Did you wipe
your feet?

Yes, auntie dear.

I had a
wonderful day today.

I-I fixed
four rear ends.

Two were trucks.

What's for supper?
TV dinners.

Again?

We ain't even
got a TV.

But Ma,

only , more
TV-dinner coupons

and we get a set.

Darling, Larry,

you're so considerate
of your mother.

Why didn't you
think of that?

I did. That's why
I been buying so ma--

Don't change
the subject!

Not so loud!

You're a doll.

Go wash the dishes
and then clean out the hearth.

Wash the dishes
and clean out the hearth.

I'll clean
the hearth.

I wish my fairy godmother
would come along.

I feel like
a He-Cinderella.

All you need is a glass slipper
instead of a bone head.

You'll miss me
when I'm gone.

Where are you going,
Cinderella?

To the ball?

[ALL LAUGHING]

No, I-I'm going on
a camping trip

with two weeks' vacation
with full pay.

Well, don't forget to leave
money for the house.

Hey, Joe.

Is this cake
for me?

Wait a minute!
That's mine!

I bought that for you,
auntie dear,

for a going
away present.

Me?

Oh, boy, a camera.
This for me, Joe?

No,
that's for me.

Hey. Wait a minute!
[ALL SHOUTING]

Wait a minute!

That's mine.

I'm going on
a camping trip.

MA:
It's mine.

JOE:
Come on, let go.

[MA GRUNTING]

MOE:
Give it to me, now.

I'm gonna
win a prize.

All right, let him
have his old camera.

He can take pictures of brother
Larry and I on the camping trip.

Oh, no. Oh, no.
I'm going alone.

Alone?

I take you in
as my very own,

and now you deny
my sons,

your loving cousins,

the pleasure
of your vacation.

I'm sorry,
auntie dear.

I-I'm an ingrate,
that's what I am.

Cousin Moe
and Cousin Larry,

you can come on that
camping trip with me.

And I'll even let you
use my ca--

Hey.

It's your cake,
auntie dear,

but whose foot is that?

You and
your big feet.

You wrecked
my cake.

Don't worry,
auntie dear.

I-I got
another one.

Hey,
give me that.

Wait, that's mine.

[MA GASPS]

[WHIMPERS]

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

I like this
Facts and Figures magazine.

Hey, Joe entered that
candid camera contest.

Give me the facts
about it.

Wait'll I look over
the figures.

What are you,
an accountant?

Come on.

"Photo contest facts.

First prize: $ , ."

Can you imagine Joe
winning a prize like that?

[LAUGHS]
No.

[LAUGHS]

Ten thousand
dollars.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

He couldn't win
, jellybeans.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

Hold still.

Watch the birdie,
the birdie.

Hey, Larry,
listen to this.

"Flying saucers
are real.

"Scientists are convinced
that space travelers

"from other planets
have visited Earth.

But no one has gotten a picture
of a flying saucer yet."

Boy.

That picture sure would
win first prize.

[SCREAMS]

[GRUNTS]

What are you
looking for?

With all that space up there,
there might be a spaceship.

And we could get
the picture, and w--

Spaceship? Yeah.

Come on. You with
your spaceship.

MOE:
Hey, hey.

It's blowing up
a tornado.

Stop shooing,
squirrel.

[CAMERA CLICKS]

Thanks,
squirrel.

Boy.
I'm sorry, squirrel,

I have no nuts. Uh.

Chewing gum.

Boy, this picture.

Oh, boy,
oh, boy,

did I get a picture!

Oh, boy!

Hey, something spoiled
my snapshot.

Hey, look.
A flying saucer.

That picture's worth
a lot of dough.

Quiet. We don't
wanna let Joe

know anything
about this.

Hey. That flying saucer
must've landed

over there back
in the hills.

Well, we'll borrow Joe's camera
and take some close sh*ts of it.

Oh, boy,
we're gonna be rich!

We'll be worth
a fortune.

[GRUNTS]

What's the matter
with you?

Come on.
Get goin'.

Loan me
your camera.

Sure.
Take my picture.

All right,
close your eyes.

Hey, wa--
Hey, wait.

All set?

Right.
Right.

Now listen,
fellas,

we'll all
go in together.

When we see
a school of fish,

let them have it.

Right.
Check.
Let's go.

All right.

I wonder where
that thing landed.

Mars men.
We're being invaded.

Run for your life.

MOE:
Oh! Hurry up, Larry.

Come on. Oh, boy.

What's the matter
with you guys?

Hi, fellas.

Howdy.
They're such cowards.

They thought
you were Mars men.

Mars men!

[SCREAMING]

[ENGINE STARTS]

Hey.

Fellas, wait for me.

[CROWD CHATTERING]

As president of
Facts and Figures magazine,

it gives me great pleasure
to present you

with the first prize,
$ , .

[BOTH GASP]

Thank you!

Ladies and gentlemen,

Facts and Figures magazine
is always happy to--

Hey, come back,
you weasel.

Any legitimate-- Excuse--
Ahem, sorry, folks.

[CROWD CHATTERING AND LAUGHING]

This beats slinging hash,
doesn't it, baby?

And how,
you doll.

Stick to me, girls, and you'll
get a trip to the moon,

one way.

[GIGGLING]

Kiss me, ducky.

[SIGHS]
[GIGGLES]

Let's drink another
toast to our heroes.

Give me some
more champagne.

Okay, baby.

Hey,
it's empty.

Oh, don't worry,
we're lousy with champagne.

Hey, Joe,
come here.

What is it,
Cousin Moe?

Get some more champagne.

I can't, I'm busy.

Well, drop what
you're doing and get it.

Okay,
if you say so.

[PLATES CRASH]

I'll butcher
that goose.

[GRUNTS]

[JOE GROANING]

Why don't you look
where you're going?

You overstuffed
bologna, I'll--

Moe,
I-I took those photos.

I should get some of that--
Shh!

You tell anybody
you took those photos,

and I'll break
every bone in your head.

[GROANING]

Do that again.

Again.

You do everything
I tell you to.

Go on!

Fresh giggle
water.

Well,
hurry up.

Oh, keep your
powder dry.

Well, come on.

[GRUNTS]

What happened?

Ha-ha-ha!
That's good for you.

That's good for you.

That's bad for me. Wow.

Oof.

LARRY:
I'm soaked to the skin.

MOE:
Me too.

So you thought you could
slip it over on us, eh?

What are you
talkin' about?

Here's an enlargement
of your flying saucer.

The government
checked it.

It's nothing but
a dirty paper plate

with a gob
of potato salad

and jelly stains
on it.

You swindlers.

That Joe, that
double-crossing rat.

Oh,
we're innocent.

We can
explain this.

Hm?
Joey?

JOE:
Coming.

[LOUD CRASH]

JOE:
What is it,
Cousin Moe?

Joe, tell these men
the honest truth

who photographed
that flying saucer.

You and Larry did,
Cousin Moe.

No, no, I mean
who really did it.

You held the camera and Larry
snapped the picture.

Yeah, we--

Why, you...

Oh!

Officer, take these
swindlers out of here.

Ma, get us a lawyer,
a cheap one.

Oh, my boys!

Oh. Oh.

[GASPS]

[SOBS]

Ooh, that double-crosser Joe!

You.

You ingrate,
you worm!

You boob!
Ooh!

You wolf!
Ooh!

You-- Oh!

[GROANS]

Oof.

Get out of my house and never
darken my door again.

Get!

Gee, I sure miss my cousins
and my dear auntie,

even if they
are mean to me.

Golly, if I could take a picture
of a real spaceship,

I bet
they'd take me back.

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

[ENGINE WHIRRING]

Oh.

I must be
seeing things.

That can't be
a real spaceship.

[LAUGHING]
Nah.

WOMAN:
Do not be afraid.

This is Elektra
from planet Zircon.

We want to make friends
with you Earth people.

We are going
to land.

Brace for landing.

[SHIP RUMBLING]

Heh. I must be dreaming.

Ow!

Not so hard.

I didn't see anything,
it was imagination.

I know--
Hello.

Hello.

I'm Tyrin, this is Elektra.
We heard what you said.

Yes, and I just
happen to have

a very nice picture
of a flying saucer.

Gee, thanks.

Gee, thanks, you're really
a fairy godmother.

Wow! What mamas.

Say, do you mind if
I take a picture of your,

uh, spaceship?

Help yourself.
Certainly.

Oh, boy.

[CAMERA CLICKS]
Sure.

Thanks.

Don't ever leave me.

We must. The entire Earth
is looking for us.

But may we
kiss you goodbye?

May you? May you?

Wow!

[KISSING NOISILY]

[SPACESHIP WHIRRING]

Bye!

Bye!

Oh, boy,
I got it made.

I got it made!

Oh, boy, will my cousins
and my auntie.

Boy, will they be--

Be happy when I get home

and show them
what I did.

Oh, boy.

You bet your life.

Coffee. I don't wanna
let that go to waste.

Gotta take that in case
I get thirsty on the way

to see my cousin
and my aunt.

Can't... Get that.

Oh, boy.

Lettuce for a sandwich.

Boy.

You betcha. Oh.

Ooh, wait. Hey.

There maybe
bears or something.

I gotta
protect myself.

[GRUNTS]

Oof! Ow!

Oh, my-- A duck!

What do you know?

Oh, my boys.

Ah, that worm,
Joe.

On account of him,
we spent all night in jail.

And we go to jail for keeps
unless we get back the money.

And we spent
nearly all of it.

Cousin Moe, Cousin Larry!

There are
real space people!

Real girls.
They kissed me.

And I got a picture
of a real spaceship.

A-And you can say
that you took it.

Ah, you're not only crazy,
you're a liar as well.

And we don't want
no part of you.

Yeah, you got us
in enough trouble already.

[GROANING]

We let him off pretty easy,
didn't we?

That does it.

Hey.

See this?
BOTH: Yeah?

[BOTH GRUNT]

[BOTTLE CRASHES]

[CROWD CHEERING]

[CROWD CHEERING]

Boy,
this is the life.

Oh.
Oh.

Oh, no.

[BOTH WHINING]

[BOTH GRUNTING]

[CUCKOO CHIRPING]

[♪♪♪]