03x04 - Amulet of Enfarg/Bad Hair Day

[bunniefuu]

( Clock chiming, thunderclap )

( Creaking )

( Owl hooting )

( Shrieking )

( Crying )

( Gasps )

( Screaming )

You lost what?!

( Needle scratching record )

( Chuckles )

Class:
the amulet of enfarg.

That's right

You little pus pockets.

The sacred amulet of enfarg.

The highest honor

In all of monsterdom.

Bestowed only on the select few

Who have mastered

The art of scaring.

And I am happy to announce

That one of you

Will be given
the prestigious job

Of scraping my amulet
free of grime

And restoring it

To all its rightful
gloriousness.

Oh, ickis,
this is so exciting.

I hope he picks me.

Yeah, me too.

However, if you feel

You are not up to such
an immense responsibility

Simply raise your claw.

For there is no shame
in admitting one's limitations.

Ickis, what
are you doing?

Admitting my
limitations.

What else?

Very well.

I've made my decision.

Ickis, you're the one.

But...

( Squeaks )

I raised my hand.

And by doing so

You have exhibited
a most honorable monster trait:

Acknowledging
your own shortcomings.

( All cheering )

Congratulations, ickis.

Thanks.

Don't blow it!

( Muttering )

( Panting )

Hey, ickis, can I touch it?

No, you can't.

Only ickis can

On account of
he's the chosen one.

Yeah, ickis, good thinking
raising your hand.

I was thinking of doing that
except I was sitting on them.

Isn't that fascinating,
pheupal?

But we've kept ickis
long enough.

Let us get us some lunch

So ickis can get
to his work.

( All mumbling )

Congratulations, ickis.

I know you shall do a great job.

Besides, some day you'll
probably be scraping

Your very own amulet.

You really think so?

Of course.
Now, do not forget

We have a group
scare assignment today.

( Oblina's voice echoing ):
"you shall probably be scraping
your own amulet..."

( Applause )

It is with great pleasure
that I present

The sacred amulet of enfarg
to my son, ickis

The youngest monster
to receive this award.

( Wildly enthusiastic cheering )

Oblina:
ickis!

Ickis!

The group scare--
did you forget?

We're all waiting.

Oh, yeah, I'm coming.

( In fake european accent ):
be careful!

My name is on that sign.

Ow! You maniac!

Watch what you're doing!

Yeah, sorry.

You could have
dislocated my spine.

Yeah, but i...

These are not fishing vests

You denim-brained putz.

They are works of art.

What? What is it?

You're looking
at my eyes? Why?

No, it's, i...

You think they are contacts,
is that it?

Well, they are real.

I just happen
to have been blessed

With naturally vibrant

Amber-colored eyes.

Well, then, uh...

One of your completely
naturally colored amber eyes

Is on your cheek.

Ach! You're just jealous

You pathetic,
common-eyed person!

Why is everyone against me?

( Wheels squeaking )

Gosh. I wonder where ickis is?

Oblina:
he said he was right behind me.

Ickis:
I am right behind you.

( Clinking and rattling )

Oh, ickis.

You are wearing
the gromble's amulet.

Yeah, I know.
Doesn't it look great?

Boy, it sure does,
it looks really great.

I wish I had a neck
so I could try it on, too.

Krumm, do not encourage him.

Ickis, take off
that amulet this instant.

Oh, please, don't worry.

Take a chill.

I know what I am doing.

I'm bad! ( Grunting )

I am the chosen one, after all.

( Footsteps )

Oh, yes, the hats.

Let's see what we have.

One ruby red
crushed velvet beret.

One black felt,
floppy with floral band.

One purple, long-ear
with eyes

And teeth?

Wait. What the...

( Roaring )

( Screaming )

( Chuckling )

Shh!

Hmph!

( Giggling )

Oh, that was
a really great group scare

Don't you think?

Hmph! It was more
of an ickis scare

Than a group scare.

Yeah, that's true,
I was pretty great, wasn't i?

Um, ickis?

I can hardly wait for
the gromble to see it

In class.

Yeah, ickis, but...

It's a scare you'd expect

From a guy who will
someday have one of these.

( Gasps )
oh, no.

I lost the gromble's amulet!

( Squealing ):
what am I going to do?

We should go
and tell the gromble.

That is what we should do.

No! Please!

You cannot do that.

You guys got to help me.

Why? You did not
seem to need our help

At your group scare.

I know, I know,
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I got carried away.

Well, all right.

I suppose it is partly my fault

For putting that idea
into your feeble little brain.

Thank you, guys, thank you.

I knew I could count on you.

Hey, ickis,
I'd love to go

But I got some
studying to do.

But your secret's safe with me.

They could snorch me
till the end of time

And I won't talk.

Monster word of honor.

I swear.

Okay, bye.

My fabulous chapeaux

On the floor?

Muriel! Hmph.

What's this?

It's magnificent.

Such inspired design!

Such craftsmanship.

Ooh!

Excuse me.

Did... Did...

Did you drop this?

Uh, no, I didn't.

Of course you didn't

You incipient,
blue-jeaned moron!

I just created it

To represent

My new fall line.

Behold!

My genius!

Hello, gromble, sir.

Oh, hello, pheupal.

Okay, okay, please, stop.

I can't take anymore.

I'll talk! I'll talk!

Ickis wore your amulet
on a group scare.

And then he lost it!

So him and krumm and oblina
are trying to find it.

They begged me to go,
but I knew it was wrong.

Can I go now?

Yes, pheupal.

( Roaring ):
ickis!!!

( People chattering )

Look at all the humans.

We're never
going to find it now.

I'm doomed.

( Gasping )

Woman:
ladies and gentlemen.

Dietrich duchamp
is proud to present

Fashion for people who "get it."

( Audience oohing )

Hey, guys, look.

Oh! That's great!

Oh, now all we got to do
is snatch it and we can go home.

Oh, no.

Now what are we going to do?

We will just have
to snatch all of them.

Come with me, I have an idea.

Ah...

( Gasping )

Let's go.

The concept for my medallion
came to me

During a psychic dream
I had last spring

When I was abroad,
which is where I'm from.

And I realized...

You're staring at my cheekbones,
aren't you?

No. I wasn't.

You think they are fake,
don't you?

( Clattering )

Blecch! They're all fake!

It has to be here somewhere.

Quick, hide. Someone's coming.

That's the one I'm looking for.

Hurry up and get out there

You tiny brains!

The show's almost over.

( Whispering ):
there it is.

( Squealing )

( Applause )

( Gromble roaring )

( Audience screaming )

Ah, the sweet sound

Of well-deserved adulation.

Time to take my bows.

( Making kissing noises )

What?

Where is everyone?

Pathetic american
discount off-the-rackers!

How dare you do this to me?

I am dietrich duchamp!

You are just jealous
of my perfections!

Do you hear me?

Jealous!

I think you have something
that belongs to me.

Ahh...

Ahh...

Oh, and...

( Snorting and roaring )

( Shrieking )

( Without fake accent ):
my real name is leonard dorkman

From duluth.

Please don't hurt me.

( Screaming )

Yikes!

( Sputtering )

( Nervous giggling )

I see you found your amulet.

Ooh, that's great.

( Sweetly ):
yes, thank you, I did find it.

( Roaring ):
and now you're going to get it!!

So you see, ickis

The amulet of enfarg

Is not something you get
from daydreams.

It's something you must earn.

Do you understand?

Yes,
your grombleness.

I understand.

I'm sure you do.
And I'm also sure

That your new job is
much more suited
to your...

Shall we say,
shortcomings?

And make sure
you match the sizes!

( Gurgling )

( Hissing )

( Bubbling )

( Rattling )

And now
for the final test.

Let there be hair.

( Squealing )

( Groaning )

( Squeaking )

Yes! Yes! I am a genius.

( Beep )

( Buzzing and clanking )

( Whimpering )

( Moaning )

I'm... Still bald.

Bald! Bald!

Bald, bald, bald, bald

I'm bald, bald, bald!

I'm a failure!

I'm a failure!

I'm a joke!

And I'm bald!

( Ickis giggling )

( Krumm and ickis giggling )

Oh, this is great.

Do you think
they'll fall for it?

Does a monster eat slime worms?

Shh! Here they come.

( Both giggling )

This is where ickis
said to meet him.

He said it
was important.

Oh, okay.

Ickis?

Are you in there?

( Hysterical laughing )

Together:
monster mischief day!

( Both laughing )

Look at you two!

That's not funny, ickis.

Oh, yeah?
Then why are they laughing?

( Laughing hysterically )

We're going to get you back,
ickis and krumm.

Oh, yes, we will.

( Sarcastically ):
ooh.

I'm so scared.

I wouldn't want to be haunted
by the great big

( Clucking )

Chickens!

( Giggling )

That was not funny, ickis.

That was cruel.

Ah, come on.

It's monster mischief day.

Krumm, let's do another one.

No, I don't think so.

Maybe oblina's right.

Oh, fine.

Suit yourself.

( Snoring )

( Both giggling )

( Both gasp )

( Snoring )

( Both laughing )

( Rooster crowing )

( Snoring lightly )

( Krumm snoring )

( Groans )

Huh?

Uh-oh.

( Gasping )

( Screaming )

( Squealing )

( Screeching )

Enough!

I like monster mischief day

As much as the next monster.

But when a prank results

In leaving krumm
without the benefit of his...

Pit hairs

I just have to put my

Pump down.

Just look at him.

( Both giggling )

His hair

His precious pit hair

Is gone.

And it will take years

For him to grow it back.

( All gasping )

Poor, pitiful krumm.

These pranks must stop now.

There is no room in this class
for such childishness!

( All giggling )

Oblina:
poor krummy.

Your hair, the very thing

That makes you you
is gone.

Go ahead, oblina.

Make me feel even worse
about this, why don't you?

( Wailing )

Krumm, I'm so sorry!

It's all my fault
for letting

Those pranks get out of control.

Krumm...

I am going to get
your hair back

Even if it kills me.

If it kills you?

Well, or hurts me a little.

Come on! Are you with me?!

Well...

Well, of course we are.

But where
are we going to get hair?

Easy.

Humans throw it away

All the time.

( Snarling )

( Screaming )

( Both screaming )

Hey!

( Snapping )

Ohh.

Nah.

Nah.

( Roaring )

( Both screaming )

Hmm.

Nah.

( Roaring )

( Both screaming )

Nah.

Nah.
Nah.

( All screaming )

( Roaring )

( Squeaking )

Nah.

( Ickis roaring )

( Crowd screaming )

( Boxes tumbling )

Nah.

( Humming )

( Roaring )

Nah.

Oblina:
hello.

( Screaming )

Nah.

Come on,
we can't give up yet.

Ickis, we have tried every place
having to do with hair

And we found nothing.

Guys, I appreciate
you pulling off

All those scares
for me

But I think
I'd be better off

Letting my hair
grow back naturally.

Years isn't that long.

I'm going to bed.

You poor thing.

Good night, ickis.

Years.

I cannot take all this guilt
for years.

I got to find hair.

What am I thinking about?

You just can't find hair!

( Moaning )

Huh?

Yes! Yes!

Thank you, thank you.

( Giggling )

( Laughing maniacally )

( Rooster crows )

( Krumm snoring )

Huh?

( Screaming )

( Screeching )

Oh, so do you
like it, huh?

Isn't it great?

Great?

It's... How did...

What did?

I said I would get you
hair, didn't i?

You did this?

That's right.

I restored krumm's hair.

All by myself.

( Giggling )

Or not.

( Laughing nervously )

"Hair tonic."

And where did you get this?

In the dump.
Isn't it great?

Krumm:
this is terrible.

Well, I admit it doesn't have

The disgusting texture
of your old hair, all right.

But with a little axle grease...

No, you don't understand.

The hair of a krumm
is not to be tampered with

By artificial means.

That's the rule of the krumms.

Well!

Do the krumms have a rule

About gratitude?!

( Heavy sigh )

I thought you
might thank me

For giving you your hair back!

But nooooo.

"The hair of a krumm

Is not to be tampered with."

Well, guess what, krumm?!

I tampered with it.

And it looks fine!

( Whoosh )

( Laughing sheepishly )

This doesn't look
so good, ickis.

Well, the dump
wasn't built in a day.

Give me some time!

There.

Perfect!

( Whoosh )

How much of this stuff

Did you put on krumm's pits?

Uh, eleven.

Drops?

Bottles.

Why, is that, is that

Is that, is that,
is that bad?

Well, you, you, you tell me.

( Rumbling )

Oop!

Well, and what do you plan

To do about this, ickis?

( Rumbling continuing )

We simply cut it.

( Rumbling stops )

There is no reason to panic.

( Whoosh )

Do you think
we should panic now?

Yeah.

We should definitely panic...
Now!

( Rumbling )

( Screaming )

( Screeching )

( Screaming )

Oh, let me...

( Rattling )

Ickis, get ahold
of yourself.

I have a plan.

It is called plan "a."

All we have to do
is keep krumm hidden here

And find a way
to stop his hair from growing

Before the gromble finds out.

Right, krumm?

I'm over here.

( Rumbling )

( All squealing )

Krumm:
sorry about that.

May I suggest
we go to plan "b"?

There is no plan "b."

I'm going back
to panicking now

If you don't mind.

( Krumm bellowing )

( Rumbling )

( Rumbling and crashing )

( Coughing )

( Squeaking )

( Giggling )

( Rumbling )

( Gasps )

Next time,
have a plan "b."

Next time, do not tamper
with the hair of a krumm.

( Thump )

Krumm.
What are you doing here?

We told you
to stay in the room.

Yeah, krumm.

What if the gromble

Finds out?

Finds out what, ickis?

( Squeals )

Got to run.

Not so fast, young monsters.

Perhaps you'd...

Ooh, hoo-hoo!

Be so kind as to let...

Ooh, hoo-ha.

...me in on...

Ooh! ( Laughs )

Oh, I'm glad to see

You keep a sense of humor

About this,
your grombleness.

There is nothing funny going...

( Laughing )

I'm giving you

Three seconds to tell me

Who is responsible for all this.

I am.

Krumm?

Is that you?

Yes, sir.

And it's all my fault.

I let ickis and oblina
convince me

That my hair was the thing
that made me me.

I shouldn't have let them
get me all worked up over it.

Krumm.

Um... Over here.

Oops. Yes.

It's not what's on the outside
that makes you you.

It's what's inside you.

You mean... My soul?

No!

( Laughs )

Your stink glands!

That's what makes a krumm
a krumm.

Wow.

I never thought of it that way.

Oh, how touching.

Now would someone mind
doing something about

All this hair!

Well, you see, i...

Krumm:
I'll handle this

With what makes me... Me.

Stand aside, everybody.

First class
krumm stinkcloud on the way!

( Groaning )

( Exploding )

( All screaming )

( Hissing )

I've been working up
that one for a while.

Good work, krumm.

I'm sorry, krumm.

Me, too.

We shall never overlook
your stinkiness again.

Well, that's that.

I'll just be going back
to the old room now.

( Gromble clears his throat )

( Laughing nervously )

Uh-uh.

Mustn't dilly-dally.

You've got a lot more work
ahead of you.

( Crying )

I hate hair.

I hate hair!

I hate hair.

I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.

Bald! The world should be bald.

Scientist:
bald, bald, bald, bald, bald!

Bald!

Bald, bald, bald, bald, bald.

I'm... Still bald.

( Gasps )

Scientist:
let there be hair.

Bald, bald, bald, bald, bald!