02x17 - Episode 17

[bunniefuu]

F[knock knock]

Amanda?

Amanda, the show's about to start.

Amanda?

[Mumbling]

Hey, what's going on?

She's asleep, but the show's about to start!

I know!

Help me wake her up.

Wait a second.

This is our chance.

To what?

To start the show-- you and me.

Uh...i don't know.

I mean, amanda's really the only one who knows--

Come on! How hard can it be?

You run out there.

You wiggle around a little.

You tell a little joke or something,

And everybody claps.

Let's do it.

You hurt my heart.

Oh!

In , , , --

Hey! H-hi!

Welcome to the amanda show.

Y-yeah.

This was a bad idea. Shh!

What do we do now?

I don't know.

Man: hey, you!

Uh, yeah.

H-hiya!

What can we do for you?

You clowns aren't amanda.

Well, no, but--

Um, we thought it'd be fun

If we could, you know,

Come out here and open the show.

Fun for who?

They're trying to take over amanda's show.

Let's get 'em!

No. No.

[Crowd yelling]

♪♪ Amanda, amanda, amanda, amanda, amanda ♪♪

♪♪ Amanda, amanda, amanda, amanda, amanda show ♪♪

[Crowd yelling]

What is going on?

Oh, amanda! Thank you.

Tell him to let us go!

Guys, why didn't you wake me up

When you were supposed to?

You see, what we were doing was--

They tried to take over your show!

It was horrible!

It was horrible!

Guys... Is this true?

Well, see, we didn't

Try to take over your show exactly.

What we were trying--

We just thought we could see if we could--

If we could handle it.

Well, you couldn't!

It was horrible!

Whoa! Guys!

Look, guys, I appreciate

Your thirst for vengeance,

But these guys are actors.

You can't just b*at 'em up here onstage.

[Crowd groans]

You want to b*at 'em up,

Take it outside.

Aah! Aah!

Ok. Stick around.

We'll be back in a second to do stuff.

Whoo-hoo!

Happy birthday, danielle!

What is it?

Only the coolest new toy ever!

Announcer: it's ham.

Let's play!

All: yay!

Announcer: play pass the ham.

Make ham walk down stairs.

Have a ham puppet show.

Aah!

Announcer: scare your stepmom.

Ham-tickle children.

Ham! Ha ha ha!

I love you, ham.

All: it's pork-tastic!

Announcer: from the makers of chili.

[Laughing]

Hey.

We got a problem here.

Yaga. Welcome to our video store.

How am I to be helping you?

What the heck is this movie you rented me?

I asked for stuart little.

No, no, no, no.

You no ask for stuart little.

You ask for stuart lipple.

Lipple?

What the heck's a lipple?

This movie better.

All: much better!

Just look at this tape.

Yaga.

Oh, oh. I am so lonesome.

Woe is the me.

Hello.

I am your new brother, stuart lipple.

Wow-ee! You are mouse, stuart lipple.

Yes. Mouse that says things.

I am cute.

So cute.

I would love you, mouse,

As my little brother,

Who happens to be a mouse.

That was wonderful!

That wasn't even a movie.

That was just you two acting like morons.

Thank you.

How you will be paying me?

I ain't gonna pay you.

All: ohh.

Egg?

Egg?

This time... Your egg!

Next time... Your face!

Lipple?

Blini: papa,

That boy, he squeezed our egg.

Yes. But next time, he will squeeze our faces.

Yaga! Yaga!

Yaga. Welcome to our video store.

How am I to be helping you?

Who's in charge of this place?

Papa, this man, he bellows for you.

I am gnocchi blokey, the manager.

How am I to be helping you?

Whhhhh-oa!

Am I maaaaad!

What is your problem to be?

My problem to be

Is I came into this--

This place to rent x-men,

But I didn't get x-men,did i?

Nah.

No, no, no, no,

You no ask for x-men.

You ask for f-men.

I despised this movie!

Oh! This movie made me want to do bad things!

Yaaah!

I wanted x-men!

But this movie better.

All: much better!

It made my eyes bleed!

Here, I will play f-menfor you.

Ohhhh, whoop-de-goody!

I am hairy mutant.

You better be nice,

Or I will scratch you with my sharp claws.

Grr.

Hey there. I am the cycleclops.

I can send beams from my eyeballs.

Stand back.

I am a bad person.

I will do a bad thing now.

Watch out for my claws.

And my eyeballs.

[Whispering] papa, fall down.

Oh, yaga.

Oofa!

Grr. Grr.

That was wonderful!

Action and adventure!

Ok. Here's a little query.

What was that?!

That was my daughter blini

And my son biscotti.

Yaga!

Yaga?

How you will be paying me?

How will I be paying you?

[Screaming]

Aah!

How's that?

Keep the change!

Ahh!

[Grunts]

Papa, this man, he give us his arm.

What it means?

I think it means...

He crazy!

Then let us dance!

Yaga!

[Music playing]

Man: clear! Nice job, everybody. Nice job.

Let's set up for the next one.

Very nice work.

Hi there.

Welcome to the dare show...

The only cable access show

Where we take your dares...

No matter how bad they are...

And we do them--

Your dares.

I'm sharon, and this is my brother toby.

Hiya!

Well, let's start with our first dare.

Barcelona, alabama, you're on the dare show.

Hi, sharon.

I dare you to brush your teeth

With your brother's big toe.

Ugh!

No way!

His toes are disgusting.

No kidding. My toenail has fungus on it.

I'm not gonna brush my teeth with his toe.

But I dare you.

Riiight.

Wimpy.

What was that?

Wimpy, wimpy, wimpy, wimpy, wimpy, wimpy...

I am so not wimpy.

Wimpy!

Wimpy, wimpy. Wimpy, wimpy...

All right! I'll do it.

Give me your toe.

Toby: oh. Ohh.

Aw.

[Spits]

I cannot believe I just did that.

That's the worst thing I've ever seen anyone do.

Your foot... Tastes like vomit.

I know.

[Spits]

Ok. Next caller.

Salt lake city, new hampshire,

You're on the dare show.

Hi. I dare toby

To b*at himself up.

Ha ha ha!

b*at himself up.

Yeah. Thanks, caller, but I don't think so.

Ha ha ha!

Oh, I'm sorry.

I thought this was the dare show,

Not the scared show.

Ok. We're not scared of anything.

Boo!

Aah! Aah!

Made you jump.

You're too scared to b*at yourself up.

♪♪ Scaredy, scaredy, scaredy ♪♪

Oh, yeah? Watch this.

Aw. Aw, man.

I cannot believe I just did that.

You look horrible.

Well, I'm going to be in pain for weeks.

All right. Next caller.

Honolulu, texas,

You're on the dare show.

Yeah. I dare you both

To cover yourself with glue

And then roll around in feathers.

We're not going to put glue on ourselves...

Then roll around in feathers.

They'd stick to us.

We'd look like big, stupid chickens.

Get real, caller.

Yellow belly.

Say what?

Yel! Low! Bel! Ly!

Yellow belly, yellow belly.

Yellow belly! Yellow belly!

Quit it.

Please.

Yellow belly!

Aah! Fine.

We'll do it.

Come on, toby.

Gross.

Yuck. Ooh.

Aw, man.

I can't believe we just did that.

We look like big, fluffy morons.

These feathers are going to be

Stuck to us for a month.

Well, I'm going to have to quit the choir.

Ok. Next caller.

Anchorage, wisconsin,

Go for the dare show.

Mom: have you kids seen my ointment?

Ohh. Ohh.

What is going on?

Uh, nothing.

Nothing.

No. You two are doing that dare show again?

No. Well...

How many times have I told both of you

That I do not--

Caller: hey! I dare your mom

To eat gallons of mayonnaise...

With her hands behind her back.

What? I hate mayonnaise.

And leave our mother alone. Yeah.

Well, I guess your mother is just...a coward.

One more time.

"Ooh. I'm an old lady,

And I'm afraid to eat mayonnaise. Ooh."

Coward.

Ooh. Get me some mayonnaise!

I cannot believe I am doing this.

I know. So gross.

Well, we're out of time.

Check us out next time on...

Oh, it's disgusting.

Aw, man.

Ew. It's in my eye.

Aw, I got mayonnaise on me.

Announcer: it's time for a hillbilly moment.

Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

Hi, hi. Knock, knock.

Who's there?

A pink toilet.

A pink toilet who?

I'm gonna hit you in the head with a pink toilet.

Huh?

Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

That's a good one.

Yup.

Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

♪♪ Amanda, amanda, amanda, amanda ♪♪

♪♪ Amanda, amanda, amanda, amanda show ♪♪

[Snore]

Siegfried.

[Snore]

Roy.

[Roar]

[Ring]

Uh, uh.

Amanda show,lobby.

Hello, please.

I left a large meat loaf outside the main doors, please.

Uh, meat loaf?

Correct.

Could you check to see if the said meat loaf is still there, please?

Yeah. Yeah. Hold on.

Meat loaf!

[Whistles]

Meat loaf.

Come on, meat loaf.

Here, meat loaf.

All right, mr. Hound dog.

This shirt was actually worn by amanda.

Sniff it, then lead me to her.

Sniff.

Good dog.

Now one for me.

Oh, that's good.

Now find amanda, and you shall receive a large bone, please.

Come on, mr. Hound dog.

Find amanda, please.

Come on. Come on, boy.

Find the amanda. Find the amanda, please.

Sniff amanda. Find her, please.

Wait, excuse me.

There are no dogs allowed on a--

Sweet dreams.

Find amanda.

Sniff. Oh.

[Knocks on door]

She must be behind this door.

Amanda, it is i, penelope taynt,

Your number one fan, please.

Hello?

You're not amanda.

Where's amanda? Is she in there?

No, she's not. Can I help you?

Stop speaking. Oh.

Your sniffing wasn't correct, please.

Find amanda.

[Sniffing]

Oh. Aha!

Amanda must be behind this door.

Amanda!

I've waited so long to finally meet you.

Quiet, crab.

I ask for amanda,

And you give me crabs?

Apparently, I'll have to do this myself, please.

[Sniffing]

Amanda?

Announcer: from his garage, it's totally kyle.

[Applause]

Um, one time, I was sleeping in my, like, bed,

And I had this totally real dream that, like,

My mom made soup for breakfast,

And I'm all, "dude, who eats soup for breakfast?"

So then, I woke up

And went downstairs to get some breakfast,

But I was in the wrong house.

Announcer: that was totally kyle.

Kyle: totally.

Woo!

Thank you, guys.

Man: hey, amanda.

Uh, yeah?

Hey, you know that sketch you guys did earlier tonight?

Uh, which sketch?

Uh, you know, the one where you play the foreigners

In the video store who always say,

"Oh, much better"?

Blockblister.

Yeah. Yeah. Blockblister.

Well, I had to go to the bathroom,

And I missed the ending.

Would you mind performing it one more time?

[Cheering]

Ok. Um, well, I'll need the cast from the sketch.

Guys?

[Cheering]

What are we doing?

Well, the guy needs to see blockblisteragain.

Seriously?

Yeah, come on. Let's just do it for him.

Whatever.

Woman: here, I brought the shirts and wigs and stuff.

Oh, thank you.

Woman: ok.

Man: all right. One sec.

Amanda: thank you. Sorry.

Ok, I'm set.

Ok. This guy just needs to see the ending,

So let's pick it up where we show

Jeremy's insane character the movie.

Right. From the clapping? Right.

Ah. Wonderful.

Yaga.

What was that?!

That was my daughter blini and my son biscotti.

Both: yaga.

How you will be paying me?

I'll pay you with this!

[In normal voice] and then, I rip my arm off.

Aah!

Yaga!

He crazy.

Yaga. Let us dance.

Yaga. Yaga.

Um, all right. How was that?

[Silence]

He's not even here.

Oh, oh. I'm sorry.

I had to make a phone call.

Could you guys do it just one more time?

No. No.

Ok. That's our show.

I got to go bodyslam my grandmother.

See ya.

[Applause]

[Sniffing]

Amanda?

I think I smell the faint, yet sweet, aroma of amanda.

Ok, little missy.

You're coming with me.

Let's go.

But wait.

I'm sniffing for amanda.

Is that so wrong?

Hey.

There was no meat loaf.

Duh, please.

Oh. Amanda. Amanda.

Penelope: amanda, please.