03x13 - Cinco De Twisto/Saving Lt. Ryan

[bunniefuu]

[rock intro playing]

♪ We are riders on a mission ♪

♪ Action kids in play position ♪

♪ Rocket power... ♪

[static]

[scratching]

[music continues]

♪ We are riders on a mission ♪

♪ Action kids in fun condition ♪

♪ Prepare to countdown ♪

♪ Rocket power! ♪

[screeches]

[boy screaming]

Stop screaming,mi hijito!

What did I tell you about protecting your voice?

Ha, ha, yeah, shh.

Little Twister has to protect his little voice.

[laughs]

Lars! Ow! What?

I didn't do nothing.

Now, don't stay out too long.

I don't want you catching a cold

with Cinco de Mayo only a week away.

Don't worry, mom.

We're only going to catch a few sets.

So, why's your mom so worried about you all of a sudden?

No reason.

You know how moms are.

It wouldn't have anything to do with that, would it?

"Maurice Rodriguez will sing accompanied by

virtuoso musician Violet Stimpleton."

Uh... um.

Oh, Maurice!

You're such a big star.

Can I have your autograph?

Twister singing?

Oh, buzz.

[laughing]: Oh, man.

Come on, I know it's goofy and all

but it's, like, a big deal for my parents, okay?

I mean, it's not thatgoofy, is it?

Not if you're a goof.

[laughing]

Yeah.

Whoa.

Man, did you see me haul off that lip?

More like I saw you falloff it.

I couldn't see anything.

Oh, man, it's late.

I got to get back.

[panting]

[snoring]

Mom: Did you practice, Twister?

I don't hear you singing.

[groans]

[clears throat]

And now the star of the show,

the best singer in all Ocean Shores...

[cheers]Twister Rodriguez!

[cheers and applause]

Thank you very much.

Muchas gracias.

[snaps fingers]

[mariachi band plays]

[singing in Spanish]

[squeaky screeching]

[laughing]

[imitates screeching]

[laughing]

Can't you just be cool for once?

Why would I do that?

Because I think I have a cold.

So? No school; be psyched.

So, mom told me not to stay out in the water

and now I can't sing at the concert

and she's going to k*ll me.

Say "Ah."

Ah.

[voice cracks][gasps]

Ah.

Oh.

Just what I thought: staying in the water

didn't just give you a cold, you cracked your voice!

You mean, like, I broke it?

That's right, bro.

You can forget all about your concert.

You broke your voice so bad

it's going to sound like this

for the rest of your life.

[laughing]

Dude, you're going to get so busted.

You've got to help me, man.

Okay, but you have to do exactly what I tell you.

Anything, I promise.

[telephone rings]

[voice squeaks]: Hello?

Hey, Mrs. Rodriguez.

Is Twister home?

Dude, it's me.

Okay, keep that up as long as you can

and don't forget to gargle.

Whoa.

Hey, bro.

Can you come videotape us on the...

Dude, why

are you standing on your head?

I'm trying to get blood to my throat.

Oh, right. Oh, yeah.

Of course. Right.

I didn't know getting ready for a concert

was such hard work.

Ow.

Go ahead, do it.

[gargling]

See?

Doesn't that feel better already?

Now remember everything I told you.

[laughing]

You okay, Twist?

Is Lars messing with you again?

[voice squeaks]: I'm fine.

What happened, Twist?

You eat a balloon for breakfast?

[laughing]: He squeaks.

Yeah.

[rattling]

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Mm, mm, mm.

Mind if I ask you a question, Squid?

What are you doing?

Hmm, for the fiesta.

Yes. Perfect.

Mucho bueno.

Ooh.

Hiya, handsome.

Cute picture.

Break a leg at the concert.

Attention, Private Rodriguez!

I hope you're training hard for Cinco de Mayo.

I want your voice in tip-top shape.

Hola, amigo.

I'm getting my fingers ready for Cinco de Mayo.

[laughing]

Oh, man!

Whassup, Twist?

What happened to you?

I kind of just felt like being alone.

But Sammy was going to show us his idea for the fiesta.

Okay. Guess what sound I'm making?

Well?

It's the sound of you beefing it in the half pipe?

No, it's a battle.

I'm doing a sound interpretation of Cinco de Mayo.

The fifth of May was the day a small band of Mexicans

defeated a large contingent of the French army

so the French wouldn't install an emperor over them.

Great, Sammy.

Yeah, real cool.

[squeaking]: Why does everything

have to be Cinco de Mayo, Cinco de Mayo?

Twister, will you just tell us what's wrong, already?

Yeah. What's up with your voice, dude?

I cracked it.

Crackedit?

I don't think that's possible, Twist.

Well, I did. I cracked it really bad

and I keep doing all the things Lars told me to

and nothing makes it better.

You listened to Lars? That's crazy.

Totally nuts.

Definitely not recommended.

I'm just going to tell my parents I can't sing anymore.

I hope there's room in your house

'cause they're going to kick me out for sure.

Mom?

I know you're going to be really disappointed

but I can't sing at the fiesta.

What are you talking about,mi hijo?

[squeaking]: I stayed out surfing like you told me not to

and I don't feel so good.

Do you have a cold? Sore throat? Fever?

Worse than that-- I cracked my voice.

Who filled your head with this "cracking your voice" nonsense?

Lars?

Well, you can forget about everything he said.

You're getting older, that's all.

Your voice is changing.

Maurice Rodriguez, you are becoming a man.

To heck with the concert.

You have other things to think about now.

I do?

Like what?

Well, girls, for instance.

[both laughing]

[kids shrieking]

[fearful groaning]

Coconut enchiladas, pineapple tacos.

Step right up and take a whack at Emperor Maximilian

enemy of Mexico.

Poor Lars, getting whomped by all the widdle kiddies.

Maybe we could go back and give him

a Cinco de Mayo noogie, huh, Twist?

Oh, yeah, yeah, huh.

Twister, what are you so bummed about?

Yeah, your folks let you off.

No concert, dude.

And I get to do my sound interpretation instead.

I know you guys think singing is lame, but...

I kind of wanted to do it anyway.

I mean, how can I be turning into a man

when I can't even do a little concert?

[mimicking]: A concert?

[laughs]

If that's how you feel, maybe you should still do the concert.

But how can I with my voice like this?

So what, bro? Who cares if it cracks a little?

[clearing throat]

And now, Twister Rodriguez and Violet Stimpleton.

Twister? But I thought...

iUno, dos, tres, cuatro!

[singing in Spanish]

[music stops]

[coughing, crickets chirping]

[music begins]

[singing in Spanish, voice cracking]

Now, that's just about the finest sound I have ever heard.

[singing in Spanish]

[all singing in Spanish]

I think it was even better this way.

Thanks, Squid.

I couldn't have done it without you guys.

[voice cracks]: No sweat, dude.

Huh?

[all imitate voice cracking]

What's the matter, voice changing?

[laughing]

Whoo-hoo! Yeah!

Huh?

Aaah!

Freeze, criminal!

You are in direct violation of code niner eight six

dash four zero three: no surfing in the swimming area.

Sir...

There's nobody out here but us.

Entirely beside the point, Rocket.

As of now, you are all beached.

How about you let us off with just a warning?

Negative!

Warnings are for fires, floods and aerosol cans!

But you always give us a warning.

Not today.

It's inspection day,

and I don't want my mentor, Major Mad Dog Madison,

to find you hoodlums violating beach regulations.

Now, go!

What's this?

No swimming, no surfing.

No littering, no fishing.

No eating lunch on the roof.

Man, what's next?

No standing in front of the sign!

That's what's next.

[helicopter whirring]

Man.

This looks way bad.

Major Madison, sir. Welcome to Ocean Shores.

I think you'll find everything

in perfect order, sir.

I have a full report

on all beach activities, complete with--

Oh, please, Ryan.

Give the big, bad lifeguard thing a rest.

Recycle that, please.

Lifeguarding isn't about guarding rules.

It's about guarding life.

Ah...

sea grass.

[sniffing]

The ocean's potpourri.

Pope-a-who?

People need freedom, Ryan.

Freedom to be themselves.

Freedom to look in the mirror each day

and say, "Hello, new best friend."

But Major Madison, didn't you always say

that a beach without rules is just a sandbox for unruly fools?

That was before my doctor told me

I needed to relax and enjoy life

or I wouldn't get to relax and enjoy life.

And call me Sparkles.

Sparkles?

It's my new earth name.

Starting tomorrow, you will learn the new way:

no rules, no regulations-- only freedom

and complete harmony.

Careful, Tice!

My herbal tea's in there.

No rules.

Have you ever read two more awesome words in your life?

I haven't been this stoked

since Raymundo started serving chili fries.

Hi, I'm Tice.

I'm my new best friend, and I'd like to be yours.

If there's anything I can do to make your stay more pleasant

please do not hesitate to ask.

[all laughing]

Could you put sunscreen on my back?

There's a place I can't reach.

One more cr*ck like that, Rodriguez, and I...

Remember, Ryan, invading someone's personal space

is what I call

a boo-boo big time.

Now, you apologize to this young man.

S... Sorry.

Live free, kids.

Enjoy your day.

That's an order.

I think you need

a Brazilian mud facial.

We are officially rule-free!

No rules, no worries!

[yelling]

Oh...

Out of the way, goof.

Whoa!

[engine revving]

What's the problem?

Swimmers in the surfing zone.

If memory serves,

this is a violation of code nine eight six.

Sorry.

"No rules"meansno rules.

What?! Come on!What?! Come on!

We can't surf!We can't surf!

Harmony... peace...

I... my new best friend.

I'm... I'm my new... I...

[yelling]: All right, let's go!

Anybody not on a surfboard

is ordered to clear this area immediately!

Now, clear my grid square, go, go, go!

Stop, in the name of life, Ryan!

But, Major... I mean, Sparkle, sir,

how are we supposed to surf with all these swimmers around?

Talk it out amongst yourselves.

Get to know each other.

Commune, exchange recipes.

Right, Ryan?

Yes, sir!

Now, how about we go and look for some puka shells?

Make you a necklace.

[loud whooshing]

Ow!

Twister: Man, this reeks!

How can we surf with all these shoobies around?

Well, we could give Major Madison's approach a try.

Exchange recipes?

No! Work it out among ourselves.

Excuse me.

This area is usually reserved for surfers

so could you clear out for those of us who prefer to surf?

[cheerful yelling]

Nice try, Reg.

We'll let the master handle this.

Shark!

[panicked screaming]

Wh-Whoa!

Take off, bro!

This turf ismine!

Yeah, that's right.

So go down there, hey.

You can't claim an area of the ocean for yourself.

We got no rules, remember?

That means there's no rule against ruling, andIrule.

Look, let's just go

to the south side of the pier, okay?

There's usually no swimmers around there,

and we can surf all we want.

See you later, losers!

[laughter]

[grunts]

Hey. I think I got something.

Yeah!

Hey, no fishing on the south side of the pier.

Yeah?

Read the sign.

Otto: "Fish wherever you want.

"Be free! Live free!

Signed, Sparkles"?

[slurping]

[groans]

I am my new best friend, and I want to be yours.

Would anyone care for a spritz?

Tice, listen, this "no rules" thing

is a total bust.

You got to do something about Major Mushhead.

I am my new best friend,

and I want to be yours and his...

This is worse than we thought.

We got to get Tice back, or we're doomed.

You're telling me.

Without rules, a kid could get hurt out here.

That's it!

We need to show Sparkles

what really happens when you don't enforce rules,

and I think I know just how.

[rhythmic chanting]

[painful moaning]

Whoa! What happened?!

What's the matter with your essence, son?

He got hit by a surfer while he was swimming.

What?! You're supposed to work things out.

[softly]: Exercise your freedom.

We did!

I exercised my freedom to swim

and he exercised his freedom to run me over

but I don't blame him.

[whistling]

[metal clanging]

Goodnight, nirvana!

The riptide warning flag!

Don't they know

their entire life force could be in danger?

Sure.

Guess they're exercising their freedom

to ignore it and have a good time.

But they... but...

[loud rock music plays]

[whining, humming]

[feedback screeching]

"No rules" rule!

[all yelling]

I am my own...

I'm... I-I am... I...

Ryan!

Yes, sir?

Restore order at once!

But what about the new way?

Rulesarethe way, Ryan!

My doctor was full of patooey!

Never take life advice from a chiropractor!

They don't know a thing about discipline and order!

[yelling]: Yes, sir!

Red flag flying! Get out of the waternow!

You are violating code six three four two niner!

Move it!Move it!

Hey, Sparkles

why don't you keep that maniac on a leash?

Perhaps you haven't heard!

I'm back in command

and this LZ belongs to me!

Oh, I, uh, I-I think I hear my mommy calling me.

Good work, Ryan.

I'm going to give Ocean Shores an "A-plus."

You are hereby

reinstated to your command.

Carry on, lifeguard.

Sir, yes, sir!

You kids are breaking rule number two six four five.

Which one it that?

Letting a beautiful day slip away.

All right!Yeah!

No walking on the sand! That means you!

Pull in that fishing rod!

Where's your sunscreen?!

Don't you eyeball me, shoobie!

I want to see nothing but pinfeathers and flapping wings!

Now move! You seagulls will clear out now! Move it!

I guess having rules isn't totally lame.

Guess not.

[all laughing]

[seagulls screeching]

Move it! Move it!

[rock music playing]

Warnings are for fires, floods and aerosol cans!