03x02 - Foutleys On Ice - Part 2

[bunniefuu]

I cannot believe

you applied for that fellowship.

Where they stop, nobody knows.

Foutley makes me sick

and there's nothing to do about it.

There's already been something done about it.

WOMAN [over P.A.]: Pack your bags,

we'll miss you... Ginger Foutley!

It's me?

I transferred you the money

from my Bat-Mitzvah account as discussed.

To help me cope

with the unforeseen trauma of this event

I'll need the help of you.

This is it, this is it!

Woman, you have Weird Human Winter Fest

written all over you.

♪ Someone once told me th♪ On the other side. r ♪

♪ Well, I paid a visit

♪ While it's possible I missed it ♪

♪ It seemed different yet exactly the same ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

♪Till further notice♪

♪ Till further notice

♪I'm in between♪

♪ I'm in between

♪From where I'm standing♪

♪ From where I'm standing

♪ My grass is green.

♪ Someone once told me the grass is much greener ♪

♪ On the other side.

GINGER: Sometimes when you're expected

to say something really meaningful,

it becomes almost impossible to say anything at all.

That's why I told Ms. Zorski

I didn't want to perform at that assembly.

I don't even know how to say good-bye to my closest friends,

let alone the entire middle school.

[loud dance music playing in house]

You guys, I don't know what to say.

We've been inseparable all these years and now...

Separation.

Separation anxiety.

I don't know about you,

but I already packed tons of pictures and stationery,

and I'm going to write every, single day.

And call twice a day.

Well, good gosh, woman, the lass needs time for her studies.

[all three laughing]

[door opens, music gets loud]

Hello!!

We're kind of all waiting for the guest of honor here.

That's so sweet, Miran...

Move it, Foutley!

Now!!

[dance music blaring]

BOY: Hey, there she is.

COURTNEY: Ginger, my sweet!

[kids clapping and cheering]

Shh-shh-shh, now, now, let's settle down.

We all know why we're here tonight:

to join me, Courtney Gripling, in saying, "Good-bye, Ginger."

Hear, hear!

Ginger, I want you to have

this clever forget-me-not gift.

Thanks, Courtney.

It's... it's...

It's Courtney.

We should have done that.

Uh... thanks, but, uh...

what am I going to do with this thing?

I'll take her.

We really get along.

Oh, Courtney-- your top is all mussed.

[clears throat]

Everyone, please raise your glasses

and say it with me again.

ALL: Good-bye, Ginger.

Good-bye, Ginger.

Good-bye, Ginger!

Thanks, everyone, but I'm not going away for good, you know.

[softly]: We'll just see about that.

[dance music resumes]

[shouting]: You're taking this quite well, Darren.

Yeah, Mr. Tough Guy.

Look, you two, no one loves Ginger more than me,

but that's exactly why I want what's best for her.

What? What?

What?

Did you even hear what you just said?

Yeah, about what?

About Ginger!

What'd I say?

BOTH: You said you love her!

Uh, no, didn't mean it the way it sounded.

I'm going outside for air.

If you didn't mean it the way it sounded, then what did you mean?

I call him "Mr. Hoodsdonowitz."

Huh... sounds Jewish.

He could be.

He looks old to me, which matters,

because without him, we can kiss the Freak fame good-bye.

Come on, let's make it happen.

Patience, my dove, is a virtue,

for, you see, before he can walk the walk,

Hoodsdonowitz must first talk the talk.

You mean, like, an accent?

I mean you must first be Hoodsdonowitz on the inside.

But Noelle, I'm not Hoodsdonowitz on the inside.

I'm just, like, water and organs and stuff.

Give it a try, Hoods.

Try to feel like a grownup.

Say something grownup.

[with deeper voice]: Hello, children.

Huh.

That didn't really feel

all that manly, if you ask me.

No.

Well, duh!

How am I supposed to feel manly?

I'm not manly-- isn't it obvious?

I know.

What are you doing?

Nothing.

Carl, what's she up to?

I don't know.

Hey, don't do...

[kissing]

[with manly voice]: Hello, children.

I'm proud of you, Ginge.

I hope you don't get tired of hearing it.

I don't.

If you need me... for anything,

I can be up there in a matter of hours, so just call me.

I will, Mom.

But I won't.

I love you, Sweetie.

And if your brother was awake, he'd say the same.

Yeah, right.

I love you guys, too.

Bye, kiddo.

GINGER: There's something magical about saying good-bye.

It's as if in that one moment

you suddenly appreciate every, single thing

about the person you're saying good-bye to

all at once.

[bus doors close]

[bus drives away]

GINGER: Ever notice how when you're standing

right next to something,

it always seems really big and, you know, important?

But when you get enough distance,

that same thing can suddenly feel tiny,

maybe even insignificant,

until you're so far away, you have to really strain

just to be able to see it all.

And new experiences are always Technicolor--

you know, larger than life.

Going to a place that you've never been to before

makes you reexamine everything.

[bus brakes squeal, engine stops]

[bus engine restarts]

This is it!

Oh, unbelievable.

[laughs to herself]

VOICE: I wouldn't.

They're not exactly friendly,

and a flashbulb in the face

might tick that big guy off.

I'm Fred.

I'm... embarrassed.

I didn't know.

How would you? But for the record,

we do our thing and let them do theirs.

Sounds fair enough.

So what's your thing?

I'm... a writer, I guess.

Cool-- I'm a fine artist.

Where are your quarters?

You're in the castle.

That building is really cool.

Where is it?

Right behind you.

Later!

[new age music playing]

[sniffs]

You mind?

No, it smells nice.

It's called "ciampa," and it helps me relax.

Right... sorry.

[sighs]

Something wrong?

It's just that, well...

suddenly I'm feeling very square.

Don't worry-- you'll find yourself here.

I'm a full-time student,

so I've just had more practice.

I'm Thea.

Oh, must be so cool to go here all year round.

Yeah, Avalanche rocks, no question.

If you have the talent to get in

and your parents can fork up the steep tuition,

it's the way to go.

My mom definitely can't afford it.

Too bad they don't offer full-time scholarships.

You never know, you could be the first.

Why don't I play good hostess

and show you around.

You can unpack later.

Sounds good.

[brakes squeal]

DWAYNE: Did you lose something?

Yeah, I did.

You want me to help you look for it?

Hey, Dwayne?

How'd you know you were really in love

the first time it happened?

Easy.

It was my girlfriend Wilma.

I saw her band, Rotten Armpit, play at the grungefest.

She took a k*ller stage dive, landed right on me,

fractured my collarbone in three places.

Wilma's so hot.

It's Ginger, it's Ginger!

Courtney, that's not Ginger.

That's Allen Binkell.

Ginger is away for a little while, Courtney.

You won't be seeing her today.

Oh, Ginger, Ginger!

I remember when she offered to loan me

the hair scrunchy right off her own head

because my hair was flying all over the place during gym.

Yeah, and you said, "Ew, no way."

That's right, I did.

[sighs]: Oh, Ginger.

This is ridiculous.

She's acting like Ginger was her best friend.

At least this nauseating little display

will come in handy for phase two.

Group hug, girls, group hug.

Let me try to soak up every last bit of Ginger

that might still be on you.

[shutter clicks]

I call this one:

"Your Best Friends Have Moved On,

So Why Don't You?"

[cackles]

[cackling echoes]

Hey, roommie-- over here.

THEA: Guys, this is Ginger, she's...

Embarrassed, right?

Not until right now.

Thanks, Fred.

[group chuckling]

She's a new fellowship transplant,

so don't get too attached.

It might be hard.

First time away from home?

Pretty much.

Are you homesick?

Surprisingly, no.

Well, what are you sore at me for?

I didn't kissher.

And it's not like she's your official girlfriend, Carl.

You said that.

Not the point.

Look, Noelle was just trying

to help me get my swerve on

and it worked.

My Hutzdonowitz is flawless,

and that means the three of us

are that much closer

to the Weird Human Winter Fest.

That's what you want, isn't it?

Well, isn't it?

Maybe I should start off the conversation.

You know, just so she doesn't think that...

Greetings, Mr. Hutzdonowitz.

[clears throat]

[in deep voice]: My closest friends call me Hoodsey.

Hoodsey.

Oh, uh, yeah, Carl had something

he wanted to, uh, conversate with you about.

Uh, Carl.

It was nothing.

Come on, Carl, don't be shy.

It's just that, well,

cheesecake pudding sounds kind of icky,

but, um, it actually isn't.

[phone dialing]

Hello, Mipsy.

What's up, Cuz?

Calling with the progress report.

Phase two of Operation Transfer Girl is going great.

Ginger loves it here

and I am doing a great job of helping her to fit in.

Chi-ching.

So if you can work your magic on Uncle Maurice

and get him to cough up a scholarship,

I think Foutley might actually accept.

The only thing is, I get the feeling

she's missing her dorky little friends from back home.

Don't worry, when Foutley gets our mailing,

she'll realize that absolutely everyone

is happier with her out of the picture.

[Hoodsey giggling]

It tickles.

Hold still.

CARL: It's like he stole all my confidence

and she's giving him all the attention

and I'm the third wheel.

Perfection.

Say, Carl, can you grab

the drywall stilts for me?

I want to take one more practice run.

You guys aren't...

Thanks, little buddy.

[angrily]: "Little buddy"?!

[in deep voice]: Hello, children.

Wow! He's a man.

He's a man.

[Hoodsey giggling]

HOODSEY: We aresogoing to that freak fest.

Ain't it grand, Carl?

Carl?

Will you give her the message that we called?

Thanks.

She's not there.

Rats.

Very well.

Let's just carry on as planned.

Now, what would Ginger do

if she were here?

She'd probably stretch out on my bed

and tell us a funny story

or something.

Uh-huh.

What kind of funny story, exactly?

Oh, you know, something about her brother

or what happened in the cafeteria

or something like that.

I see.

My brother, Blake,

almost left the house wearing tweed slacks today.

Really! Then what happened?

Mama said, "Oh, no!"

Tweed, huh?

Oh...

It's no use.

I can't do it.

I just want things back to normal.

I mean...

You don't actually wear these, do you?

Let's try looking on the bright side.

After all, if Ginger wasn't away,

the three of us would never have had this chance

to get to know each other.

Off me.

Look, it's not that I don't find you girls Gingerish-- I do--

and while doing these ridiculous little sleepovers

and nightly phone calls

are certainly Gingeresque,

it's... it's a far cry from the real deal.

The truth is, you're not Ginger.

Neither of you.

But I wish you were.

What's going on with me, Ginge?

It's like I can't stop thinking about you.

[knocking]

Uh, come in.

Uh, Son, everything okay?

Uh, sure, Dad.

We were, uh, just walking by your room

so we thought we'd see if you wanted to talk.

About what?

Well, uh, she and I,

we just, uh, couldn't help but, uh...

You haven't been yourself lately, sweetie.

Not eating much, not talking much.

I hear you in your room

at all hours of the night,

so I know you're not sleeping much.

Yeah, I know.

It's the weirdest thing,

but ever since Ginger left, nothing's the same.

I'm not interested in anything

and I can't stop thinking about her.

[cheerfully relieved]: Is that all, Son?

Oh, shucks!

That's okay!

You're just in love, is all.

Oh, heck.

If you love her, Son, just do what I did with your mother.

Throw her in a headlock and give her a noogie?

Sure enough worked for me.

Let the boy alone.

Honey, if you really think you love her, then go tell her.

Tell her, because life moves along

fast and furious.

And if you don't step up to bat,

you can be sure that someone else will.

Let me give you a lift.

But it's right there.

It's right there

if you're going back to your dorm,

but if you're not going back to your dorm,

it could be anywhere.

How about a little ride?

I'll let you drive.

It's getting late and I was supposed to check in

with my friends tonight from back home.

They got this far without you.

They can tough it out.

Okay, but I'm not driving this thing.

I don't even know how.

[engine revs]

Oh, it's ginger chicken, see?

Uh, look, Courtney,

this whole "woe is us" thing

isn't really working out.

I mean, you're hoping

thatwecan fill Ginger's shoes...

And we're hoping thatyoucan fill Ginger's shoes.

But the truth is

none of us can fill Ginger's shoes, which are...

Size ½, I know.

And what's worse is, mourning Ginger's absence

is really taking its toll on my complexion.

Look at these frown lines.

I've gone through an entire canister

of dual-purpose wet-dry powder in less than a week.

I'm sure Mipsy has some in her locker.

They know each other's combinations.

Now, that's friendship.

COURTNEY: "Operation Transfer Girl."

GINGER: It's so weird.

The longer I'm away from home, the more at home I feel here.

But at the same time, it's really nagging at me

that I haven't heard from Dodie or Macie yet.

But every time I try to call them, something comes up,

which kind of makes me wonder if after all these years,

maybe we're actually growing apart

and if maybe, like my mom said,

that kind of change is a good thing.

Thea, wait up!

Well, well,

you got in late last night.

I was hanging out with Fred.

Right on.

He's a total catch.

A guy like that

could make a girl never want to go home,

don't you think?

Oh, speaking of home, you got a package.

I left it on your bed.

That's so funny.

I was thinking about home all morning.

What were you thinking?

Well, a lot of things.

But mainly I was realizing

that the big difference

between Avalanche Arts and Lucky Junior High

is that at Lucky,

everyone just wants to fit in,

and here it's like the more you stand out,

the better.

Ladies.

Guess that's kind of true.

I think I'm ready for a little change.

Cool.

Want to help me?

I do, actually,

and I know just where to start.

[in distance]: Psst!

Carl?

I'm inside the cubbies.

[gasps]

Noelle, what are you doing here?

Something has gone terribly wrong with Carl.

Can you feel it?

Yeah, he's P-Oed.

It's all my fault.

I didn't want to be in this stupid freak fest

until I saw how much it mattered to Carl,

how much attention he was giving me.

I know, right.

And then when I kissed you

and he got so jealous...

I know, I know.

But the whole thing backfired.

I thought all this

would make him like me even more,

but instead...

Aha! Just as I suspected.

No, Carl, you don't understand!

Oh, I understand perfectly.

And don't worry, the two of you won't have to sneak around

to get away from me anymore.

I'm finished with both of you

and I'm not going to the freak fest, either!

On the one hand, opening it is a total violation of privacy.

But on the other hand,

if they're up to something really rotten,

they need to be stopped.

Desperate times, desperate measures.

You do it-- French tips.

[gasps]

I knew it! I knew it!

Ginger didn't get into that school on her own.

Miranda and Mipsy were behind the whole thing.

What?!

This is a copy of the letter Mipsy wrote to her uncle.

He's on the board.

And here's a receipt for a wire transfer.

[gasps]

She paid off her cousin to help.

This is unbelievable!

All this to get rid of Ginger?

And look at this.

"Your best friends have moved on, so why don't you?"

[gasps]: Oh, my gosh!

This is total propaganda, if I'm not using that word incorrectly.

We have to get up there.

We have to talk to Ginger.

If she thinks we've turned on her,

she might actually stay up there for good.

Emergency after-school meeting at my house.

Oh, my gosh.

What?

It's just...

That sounded like something Ginger would say.

GINGER: I'm a writer, I guess.

FRED: Cool. I'm a fine artist.