♪
(Honking)
Whoa!
Whoa!
Ah!
♪
♪
What are you doing?
Rewinding my CD.
Hi, I’m new, can you tell me
how to get to the office?
Sure, go past grunge.
(Grunge music playing)
Take a left at techno.
(Techno music playing)
Keep going, past the folkies and
the goths.
Don’t ask the folkies for
directions; they’ll just sing
about mistreated railway
workers!
♪ And he laid his hammer down
Then take a right at thrash
metal.
(Screaming)
And the door’s right there!
Next to teen boy bands!
(Boy band music playing)
Thanks!
Our generation has so many
different kinds of music.
Yeah, and they’re all bogus!
Except for ours.
TOGETHERYeah!
But the boy bands are the
worst!
They don’t write songs, they
don’t play instruments, all’s
they do is look cute!
(Girls screaming)
They’re the care bears of
music!
Hey, Julie, I was wondering if
you wanted to go to the mall
later.
Why?
’Cause we’re teenagers...?
Sure, okay!
Hey, are you listening to the
new CD by N’ Talented?
Uh, I didn’t get that one
yet!
You know what sets you apart
from all the other boys in
school?
The fact that I spend way
more on tire care products?
(Giggling)
Your honesty!
Every other boy in school
pretends not to like N’
Talented, just because they’re
popular.
Not me, I’d never pretend not
to like them!
Julie, Julie!
Hi!
(Panting)
It’s... they’re coming to
Bayview!
Who’s coming?
N’ Talented!
(Screaming)
What happened?
Did they clone Leo DiCaprio?
N’ Talented!
(Screaming)
I don’t get it; they’re four
boy singers who don’t even sing!
Puh-lease!
It’s Mitch, Randy, Sammy, and
Ted... this week.
There’s only four of them, but
they’re so hunkalicious!
What’s all the noise?
I’m trying to study for my first
aid exam!
(Groaning)
Oh, Kate’s freaking out
because of some group coming to
town.
Ah, today’s music is just a
bunch of bangin’ and screamin’!
Who is it?
Four goofs called N’
Talented!
N’ Talented?
(Screaming)
♪ Oh baby baby baby
♪ You’re the baby girl for me ♪
Dad, when you were my age,
which, I still don’t get how’s
that’s possible, what kind of
music did you listen to?
(Gasping)
Oh, you know, I was a big
Megadirt fan, but I don’t
suppose you’ve heard of them.
Sure!
(Cheering)
PELSWICKThey were real cool
in their day, before they got
old and ugly and no-one bought
their albums anymore!
CONCERTGOERDude, he’s bald!
(Gasping)
(Screaming)
Whatever happened to them?
(Shushing)
ANNOUNCERWelcome back to
our N’ Talented countdown!
Some sad newsgroup member Ted
was arrested at the zoo today
for an undisclosed feeding
violation!
Oh, Ted!
ANNOUNCERThe new group line
up is Mitch, Randy, Sammy, and,
Bill!
Oh, Bill!
Tickets go on sale in three
days, but apparently some
fanatics are already lined up!
Open up, I need two seats
near the restrooms!
♪
(Sighing)
You gotta come out
eventually, Lewd-win, and when
you do, you’ll still have that
humongous zit on your nose!
Hey, Pels-wheels!
You going to see N’ Talented?
Ha, you’re being funny,
right?
I only listen to downloaded MPs
of unsigned bands.
Alt-rock, punk-folk-fusion,
acid-house-cyberjazz!
That stuff’s trash!
Sprug’s the only band worth
listening to!
Sprug!
(Screaming guitar solo)
PELSWICKWhatever floats
your boat!
(Sighing)
So who’s your, like,
favourite?
I don’t have a favourite; I
like them all!
Plus the ex-members who were
fired due to burnouts, prison,
imprudent marriages, and that
thing that’s never discussed!
You’re lying!
What?
You think Mitch is the
cutest, but you won’t tell me,
’cause I think so too, and
you’re trying to steal him from
me behind my back while my
front’s turned in the other
direction!
I’m not going to dignify that
with a reply, Sandra, but I am
going to do this!
(Muffled screaming)
You lining up for tickets
tomorrow?
Tomorrow, are you kidding?
I’m going straight after school!
(Phone ringing)
Hello?
What!?
Tonight?
No, no, no, I can’t!
But mom!
What is it?
Oh, my uncle’s in the
hospital having a lung removed,
and I have to visit him!
I can’t line up for tickets!
(Sobbing)
(Thunder booming)
Pelswick?
You must have me confused
with someone else!
My hair!
Dude, this is very uncool!
Y’know, only . per cent of
guys actually listen to N’
Talented.
I don’t listen to them,
they’re awful!
(Growling)
You know, in a genuine and good
and skilful way...
Heh heh!
Go Mitch!
Mitch!
(Sighing)
We respect your right to
listen to any kind of music,
just from now on, don’t tell
anyone you know us!
Don’t tell anyone I know us!
Guys, don’t you realize what
two tickets to this concert
means?
They’re not just tickets - oh,
no - they’re a powerful,
irresistible, babe magnet!
(Zapping)
(Swooning)
(Thunder booming)
I’m so glad to see it’s not
just grown men who like N’
Talented!
You girls like them too!
(Giggling)
Shh, there’s an announcement!
ANNOUNCERSad news for N’
Talented fansSammy has left
the group for a soon to be
failed solo career!
The line up is now Mitch,
Randy, Bill, and Craig!
Craig!
(Swooning)
Craig!
(Giggling)
♪
(Sitar music playing)
(Gasping)
Groovy, man!
This reminds me of linin’ up
for Jimmy!
You saw Jimi Hendrix?
Nah, Jimmy Osmond!
Okay, the line wasn’t real
long!
Great group, huh?
I was so excited, I snuck out of
the tuberculosis ward to be
here!
(Coughing)
Great group, huh?
(Coughing)
What are you wearing?
Y’know, the sixties ended in
; that stuff isn’t cool
anymore!
Eh, not this week, anyway!
Your failure to appreciate my
groovy-osity is bringin’ me
down, man!
Whoa, wait, you’re here to
give me a clue on getting better
tickets!
You already got it!
Well, I gotta split!
Got it, got what, the clue?
I missed it, no, tell me again!
Was it about grooviness and
sitars and flowered pants?
Come back!
(Snoring)
(Rooster crowing)
(Cheering)
♪
I was this close!
If it wasn’t for that girl with
tuberculosis tripping me!
(Sobbing)
Ninth row!
That’s so close, you can see
their lips not quite matching
the music!
Who are you talking?
Gram-Gram!
She has a plan to get up front!
(Cheering)
Fake a broken hip, and grab the
boys when they come to help
her!
(Gasping)
(Cackling)
Hi, Julie, how’s your uncle?
Fine.
Luckily there was a guy with
three lungs in the bed next to
him, but I’m not going to the
concert!
Actually, yes you are!
(Screaming)
Oh, Pelswick, you rock!
(Laughing)
Wait ’til I tell my best friend
Sandra!
Sandra, guess whatI’m going to
the concert with Pelswick!
Got the last ones, huh?
Yep, the ladies are gonna
love me!
(Shouting)
On the downside, I’ve got to sit
through a whole concert by these
talentless, butt-wagging pretty
boys, and I’ll actually have to
listen to their songs!
You fraud!
I...
I... uh.
I thought you were more open
minded than the other boys, but
I was wrong!
You’re no better than my
parents!
Why don’t you just listen to
them before you make a judgment!
(Sobbing)
(N’ Talented music playing)
(Knocking)
Hey, champ!
Uh, Kate told me about today, in
a completely non-squealing,
caring, sibling context.
Y’know, I learned that back in
the seventies, when I was lead
guitarist in a Megadirt tribute
bandit’s what you like that
counts!
Dad, I don’t know how to tell
you this, but I think I actually
like N’ Talented!
What are you, nuts?
(Wheelchair engine revving)
I can’t like them!
That’d make me an N’ Talented
liker!
I can’t be that uncool!
Hi, everyone, I’d like to
talk to you about my two
favourite thingsN’ Talented
and sewing my initials in my
underwear.
Goon, Ace?
Actually, we’re not Goon and
Ace; we’re Alan and Adam!
GOON & ACEThe Backwards
Boys!
We couldn’t get tickets, so
we’re auditioning to be the
opening act!
(Laughing)
Like... ow!
Did I mention my collection
of restaurant juice glass
doilies?
(Sighing)
ANNOUNCERAnother N’
Talented updateRandy just got
married, sorry girls, and has
left the group, making the new
line up Mitch, Bill, Craig, and
Evan!
Evan!
(Swooning)
So?
You were right!
I listened to them.
They’re good!
See, you like N’ Talen--
Shh, do you wanna ruin me?
We can enjoy the concert
together!
Okay, I’ll listen one more
time, and this time I’m not
gonna like them at all!
♪ I love your clothes
♪ I love your taste
(Heavy metal playing)
Motor butt!
What you listening to?
Me, oh, just some Euro grunge
world music that I...
No, hey, give me that!
No way!
Hey everybody, Pelswick’s
listening to N’ Talented!
(Laughing)
You going to the concert too?
No!
Well, yeah, but, y’know that’s
just ’cause Julie’s--
And he’s going to the
concert!
(Laughing)
It’s okay, I didn’t tell
anyone!
Thanks.
Oh, hello?
Am I the th caller?
No, you were the first
caller, then the third, then the
ninth, then the eleventh, now
the fifteenth!
Change of plansyou break
your hip, and while you’re
writhing in fake agony, I shimmy
out to the parking lot, and
carve a Gram-Gram sized hole in
the back of their bus with this
baby!
The jaws of smooch!
And then, I tie ’em up with
first aid bandages, and it’s
time for love!
You’re not going to hurt
them?
Well, I may have to splint
their pucker muscles, but
they’ll survive!
(Laughing)
I don’t like N’ Talented!
I never liked N’ Talented!
Um, you seen boogie oogie
oogie woogie dancin’ shoes?
You look ridiculous!
That’s just the hypnotism
talkin’!
I always thought I was cool,
but I like a bunch of cheesy
no-talent lip-synchers!
Why are you dressed like that?
It’s Saturday night!
I’m stayin’ alive while
deepenin’ my love on the lights
of Broadway!
It’s Thursday, and if you
didn’t want me to buy the
tickets, why not just say so?
Where’s the guardianing?
Where’s the angeling?
You show up dressed like John
Travolta!
You don’t help!
Well, I see you understand
the advice, so I’ll be goin’!
What advice?
I missed it again, tell me!
No, don’t go!
(Sighing)
Do not pick up the headphones!
Do not put them on my head!
You’d better not push play!
♪ I love your clothes
♪ I love your taste
♪ I love the makeup
on your face ♪
And what are you willing to
do for tickets to the concert of
the year?
I’m going to...
(Laughing)
...juggle chickens!
Okay, I’ll be right here to
pick you up!
Have fun!
(Sighing)
Oh, boy, I saw Megadirt here.
Well, until I was knocked
unconscious by a stage diver.
(Megadirt music playing)
But, those were the three
greatest notes!
(Screaming)
Right now, they’re backstage
putting on their matching suits,
plugging in their tape player!
Pelswick’s not here!
Oh, take that off!
What are you ashamed of?
Hi, Julie!
Sandra, how’d you get a
backstage pass?
I’m with the warm-up act!
♪ My love for you, girl
♪ Is bigger than your nose
Actually, girls, warm-up
act, over here!
Sorry, we’re going to watch
some guy juggle chickens!
Can’t compete with that!
(Flash clicking)
Ha, I got it, I got his
picture!
Cover of the yearbook, here I
come!
(Crashing)
Ladies and gentlemen!
Okay, mostly ladies, well,
except for Pelswick.
Presenting...
The Backwards Boys!
It’s going good, huh!
Actually, % of all warm-up
acts are immediately pelted
with--
(Groaning)
Okay, now that you’re warmed
up, here’s--
(Screaming)
N’ Talented!
♪ I love your clothes
♪ I love your taste
♪ I love the makeup
on your face ♪
♪ The facts were perfect
Excuse me, you’re in a
wheelchair.
Very observant of you, but,
uh, I already knew that!
Fire regulationsyou’re
blocking the aisle.
Gotta move you up to the side of
the stage.
JULIE’S MINDThe side of the
stage?!
Next to the boys?!
I have rights!
I’m a paying citizen!
Isn’t this great?
We’re so close, I can feel their
butt wag breeze!
What are you, like, doing
here?
I’ve had enough of you trying to
steal my possible future
husbands!
(Screaming)
I didn’t win?
What am I going to do with all
these chickens?
Hey, that groovy axe work
sounds familiar!
♪ So good we look so good
♪ We look good
(Growling)
(Gasping)
(Crickets chirping)
Megadirt?
That’s why I like them!
Eww, you mean, they’re like,
really four old guys?
What’s the problem?
You like their music; it’s the
same songs!
Puh-lease, you have so much
to learn about being hip!
Julie, I so apologize!
Marry them all, see if I care!
Being hip!
Now I get it!
Today’s hip is tomorrow’s
stupid!
Duh!
(Megadirt playing rock music)
Ah, finally!
(Screaming)
Surprise, cuties!
(Smooching)
Who wants some sugar?
(Screaming)
♪
01x06 - NTalented
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Series is about the title character, who uses a wheelchair, emphasizing that he lived a normal life. It was based on the books created by John Callahan.
Series is about the title character, who uses a wheelchair, emphasizing that he lived a normal life. It was based on the books created by John Callahan.