♪
(Honking)
Whoa!
Whoa!
Ah!
♪
(Sighing)
Surely, people will one day
realize the only thing less
biodegradable than a foam
hamburger box is a cafeteria
hamburger.
(Exploding)
(Chewing)
(Belching)
PELSWICKJulie!
(Panting)
I got you another one.
Thanks Pelswick!
You’re a true friend of the
planet.
I emptied it for you.
I think it’s great that you’re
the Bayview recycling warden.
(Gasping)
(Whistling)
Paper plate, Eric Slaver!
I also got you these pieces
of aluminum foil.
You environmentally rock!
They put these through a
step chemical process and after
hours they come out the other
end as braces for free range
farm animals.
Where did you get them?
The big one was over Old Mrs.
Lunquist’s kitchen window!
She put it there to keep aliens
from controlling her dog’s mind.
(Gasping)
They’ve come for you.
Don’t worry, I’ll save you Mr.
Bozzle.
Doesn’t it feel great to
recycle?
(Slurping)
Well, if it isn’t the do
goody do gooder good person
club!
Yowch, ooh, way to insult
there, Boyd.
Rarely have I felt so severely
zinged.
Recycling is stupid!
This stuff’s garbage.
That’s why we throw it away.
(Gasping)
(Whistling)
Boyd, aluminum cans go in the
blue box.
Guess you’ll have to fish it
out or get Ramp-o to drive in
and get it for you.
(Laughing)
I don’t know how Bayview won
the national recycling award
five years in a row with people
like that living here!
ACEHey, Julie.
I found this big lump of tin
foil in the park next to a fire
hydrant.
(Barking)
There is, like, absolutely
nothing zero-ly triple t-minus
zippo zilcho to do in this town.
Hm.
What about the science centre
and the library?
Library?
Ooh, grow a life.
Hi, guys.
Hi, Goon.
Hey, man.
Hey.
Friends, I want to share a
happy opportunity with you.
Have you heard of Hammerlock
Detergent?
Which is used by every member of
the Galactic Wrestling League.
That’s why they call it the
meaner scrubber!
Goon, are you okay?
I have never been better or
potentially richer in my life.
Richer, how?
Richer with money!
(Laughing)
I get a cut of all sales of
detergent, body slam deodorant,
and lady body slam lightly
perfumed torso spray.
(Hissing)
(Coughing)
Plus for every new person I
sign up, I’m entered in a draw
to meet a GWL legend like the
Tobogganator.
(Cheering)
(Screaming)
Step on the Tobogganator and
you go downhill fast.
Here are just some of the
success stories.
ANNOUNCERMr. Todd Morten
who once eked out a living as a
sheepdog’s companion now owns
three and a half Rolls Royces,
and has taken rumba lessons
from Ricky Martin’s aunt.
Goon, it’s kind of hard to
see that in the daylight.
So, you want to sign up and
become a future millionaire like
me?
At this time I think I’ll
pass.
Actually, me too.
Like, pass-a-rooni.
Oh.
Oh, oh, oh, ma’am.
I’d like to share a happy
opportunity with you.
Ooh, and your cute little
monkey.
(Punching)
GOONOw.
Orangutan?
(Punching)
(Whimpering)
I think Goon’s become the
victim of a pyramid scheme.
I wonder how something like
that get’s started.
Well, one person tells two
other people they can make a
fortune selling something no one
needs.
Like Goon’s wrestler
detergent.
ACEYeah, or vitamins,
toothpaste, or lunchbox mates
the talking sandwich companion.
I remember those.
Like, what goof head would
actually buy a talking toy to
keep their lunch company?
Now you won’t be lonely Mr.
Ham and Cheese with extra
radicchio.
He’s going to eat you, hide
behind the dessert cookie.
If no one wants the product,
how do these two people, like,
make money?
By talking four more people
into selling whatever it is.
But then those four people have
got to find eight people and
they’ve got to find sixteen.
Eventually everyone’s selling
it, nobody’s buying and they all
go broke except for the guy who
started the pyramid.
What a scam!
Completely.
They should’ve sold yo-yo
earrings instead.
(Slide whistle sounding)
They’re going to be huge.
Whoa!
(Crashing)
Hey Gram Gram, what’s going
on?
Aw, there’s nothing to do
around here.
So I’m trying to teach this
stupid cat how to play dominos.
Your turn, you big hairball!
What are you waiting for cat
Christmas?
When you yell your tongue
looks like a big flopping tuna.
Aye, Pelswick.
Welcome home from school.
I will now sing the alphabet.
A, G, C, D, E, F, G.
Wow, I’m truly impressed.
You actually found something
you’re worse at than being a
guardian angel.
This is Mr. McDavid, he’s
made of scotch pine.
Pretty funny, huh?
Heh, not yet.
Listen, a friend of mine is
getting involved in something
that might not go over very
well.
Speaking of not going over
very well, you should’ve seen us
last night.
Luckily I wasn’t there.
(Laughing)
That audience was brutal.
You weren’t there?
(Booing)
You’re awful, get off the
stage!
I haven’t been hit that hard
since I was a tree.
(Laughing)
A tree!
They told me not to come back.
You mean?
That’s right, I was fired.
Wood!
Are you sure he can hear?
Until right now I thought the
worst act I’d ever seen was
Lester Farkel and his trained
turkey dancers.
(Gobbling)
If you’re not going to give me
advice for Goon, go somewhere
and practice.
Our act?
Ducking.
See you.
(Sighing)
Clear.
Good job.
Hard to believe that before I
started this city wide campaign
people just threw their
recyclables in the trash.
What’s hard to believe is
that I, like, managed to make
yo-yo earrings work with a hoop
skirt.
I’m sure Goon will realize
it’s just a scam.
Don’t count on it.
Remember, Goon’s still a member
of the "Buy Another Piece of
Ladder Every Month to Reach the
Moon Club."
(Grunting)
(Sighing)
Not quite.
Ooh, maybe next month.
Okay, but face it.
He’s never going to talk two
more people into selling some
wrestler laundry detergent.
And when he sees that he’ll
quit, right?
Happy opportunity.
Simon, these are my friends
Pelswick and Ace.
How’d you like to become
involved in the selling
opportunity of a lifetime?
They’re mine, Simon.
Try the waitresses.
Harvey Krim, who’s one level
above me, made a six figure
income last year.
And got a two minute hug from
GWL Legend Man Mountain Marvin.
Ooh.
It’s true.
(Coughing)
You can come in at the entry
level for bucks.
MANFries up!
GOONOoh, the kitchen staff.
They must’ve saved up a fortune
from reusing the straws.
Ooh, hi.
Can I get another fork?
This one has some egg on it.
SIMONHappy opportunity.
(Screaming)
♪ Hammerlock, oh Hammerlock
♪ Just use one little pinch and
away go grease and grime and
sweat and slime and all that
stench ♪
Happy opportunity.
This is getting borderline
freaky.
Reminds me of that black and
white movie where everyone in
town turned into pod people.
ALLHappy opportunity.
(Grunting)
(Gasping)
(Grunting)
Happy opportunity.
JULIEThanks for letting us
tour the recycling plant.
I don’t know why we never did it
before.
’Cause it’s, like, boring and
smelly?
After the materials are
separated where do they go next?
Hop in the recycle mobile,
ladies, and I’ll show you.
Very impressive.
Where does it go from here?
What do you mean from here?
This is it.
This is it?
All your hard work and
blowing that annoying whistle
helped make it all possible.
This is just another garbage
dump.
Oh no, the garbage dump’s on
that side of the fence.
This is a recycling dump.
Pelswick, what do you know
about Hammerlock?
Why?
Are you dropping out of school
to sell it?
No.
Hammerlock’s for fools, but
there’s no better customer than
a fool.
That’s why I’m selling these.
a*t*matic nose tappers to free
your hands to hold more boxes
of...what is that stuff anyway?
Detergent.
Oh yeah.
Well, anyway, two days ago there
were three yokels selling it.
Yesterday there was , and
today there’s ,.
ALLHappy opportunity.
This nut ball fad’s going to
put me in private school!
I may have to change my name to
Catherine.
Get your nose tapping hats, you
lunatics!
It’s nice to see not
everybody in town is turning
into a slogan chanting zombie.
ACEHi, Pelswick.
Hey, Ace.
Want to sh**t some roof hoops?
Actually, happy opportunity.
(Gasping)
Not you too!
MAYORYoung lady, Bayview
has won the National Recycling
Award five years in a row.
But we’re not recycling!
For it to be recycled you have
to do something with it!
Do something with it?
It’s garbage!
No it’s not!
The garbage is next door.
That acres of stinking refuse
can be reused as a...well a--
Will you stop that!
(Screaming)
Well, if you can think of
something to do with it you can
have it!
Happy opportunity.
Happy opportunity.
Happy opportunity.
Happy opportunity.
Happy opportunity.
MAN & WOMANHappy
opportunity.
When is this going to stop?
Tough crowd last night.
I tell you.
They would’ve booed fireworks.
You were there this time?
Uh-huh, but this time Mr.
McDavid couldn’t make it.
Say, Mr. McDavid, who was
that lady I saw you with last
night?
(Scottish accent)That was
no lady, that was your other
arm.
(Booing)
This is probably a stupid
question, but have you given any
thought to what I said about my
friend’s being brainwashed into
selling detergent?
Maybe I should rehearse more
in front of a mirror.
Maybe you should rehearse
more together.
Okay, what am I going to do?
What am I going to do?
I know, Vice Principal Zeigler.
He’ll know what to do about
this.
Oh, that’s right, no moon.
I’d better come back tonight.
Then again, maybe not.
Oh, Mrs. Doorhammer, I, uh--
Happy opportunity.
(Gasping)
PELSWICKMr. Mayor!
Mr. Mayor!
There’s something going on in
town that I think you should--
(Beeping)
Happy opportunity!
(Beeping)
We need to do something with
all these crushed cans, boxes,
bottles, and newspapers.
We could, like, build a
bridge out of it.
Build a bridge out of it?
Build a bridge out of it?
(Laughing)
Why don’t we just build a
playground, or a mall, or a
recreation centre while we’re at
it!
(Laughing)
That’d be, like, cool.
That’s it!
Let’s build a recreation centre!
It’s beautiful.
It’s so, like, me.
(Creaking)
Good night, and happy
opportunity.
That’s not my hat, that’s a
cheap knock off nose tapping
hat!
It doesn’t even tap his nose, it
just hangs there.
(Dialling)
Barry, babe, sue everyone!
They can’t get away with this.
I want compensation.
This is great.
Hammerlock’s bringing the
community together.
What?
Yeah, and at tonight’s
meeting someone is going to win
a pair of Disgustingly Evil
Clarence’s shorts.
Not them too.
What am I going to do?
My own family’s become detergent
selling zombies!
JIMMYNow for your
entertainment I’ll recite a
poem while Mr. McDavid drinks a
glass of water.
Shall I compare thee to a
summer’s day?
(Coughing)
Breathe, breathe.
It worked fine last night.
We would’ve k*lled if there had
been an audience.
I’m funny, Mr. McDavid’s funny,
the audience looks funny.
I wish I knew what this act
needs.
Have you ever thought maybe
it needs all three things in the
same place at the same time?
You know, you, McDavid, and the
audience?
Thanks again for all your help
with my problem.
I’ve got to go find Julie.
PELSWICKJulie, Sandra.
(Sighing)
Thank goodness I found you.
You’ve got to help me.
The whole town’s fallen into
that...that--
What is that?
It’s a recreation centre for
the town.
Do you like it?
It’s, um, very modern.
Uh, what’s holding it together?
Like, what do you mean?
I mean did you nail it, or
bolt it, or what?
We didn’t have nails and
bolts, Pelswick.
They’re not recyclable.
(Creaking)
ALLHappy opportunity, happy
opportunity, happy opportunity.
Sue him, and him, and that
guy, and her!
(Murmuring)
Happy opportunity, friends!
ALLHappy opportunity.
I have some great news.
I only need more
sub distributors to start making
money.
(Cheering)
This is the last person in
town who isn’t already a
salesperson.
Person.
What are we going to do?
We have no one to sell to!
(Murmuring)
We need to charter a huge bus
and travel the world and find
more people to sell too.
(Cheering)
But we have no money to
charter a bus.
(Gasping)
There’s a building collapsing
by the dump.
They’ve called in rescue workers
from out of town.
We can sell Hammerlock to the
firemen!
(Murmuring)
(Creaking)
(Sirens wailing)
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Wait a minute.
Why would you spray water on
this?
Because, we’re firemen.
(Gasping)
(Murmuring)
Happy opportunity, big boy.
(Murmuring)
ALLHappy opportunity.
(Coughing)
(Spitting)
(Gasping)
Oops.
It’s the Commandments of
selling detergent.
(Gasping)
Huh?
This isn’t detergent, it’s quick
drying cement.
(Gasping)
Hey, you’ve all been scammed!
This isn’t detergent, it’s quick
drying cement.
(Gasping)
It’s a crooked pyramid
scheme.
Crooked pyramid?
Have you ever thought maybe it
needs all three things in the
same place at the same time?
That’s the answer!
Pour the detergent and the water
on the garbage!
It’s not garbage, it’s
recycling!
(Murmuring)
(Cheering)
(Creaking)
I hereby declare this
recreation centre officially
open!
(Cheering)
I can’t believe Hammerlock
was just a scam.
I’ll never get involved in
something that dumb again.
So, Julie, what are you
going to do with all these empty
Hammerlock boxes?
Ooh, if you can wait ’til
tonight I’ll carry them all up
to the moon for you.
♪
02x13 - Invasion of The Buddy Snatchers
Watch/Buy Amazon
Series is about the title character, who uses a wheelchair, emphasizing that he lived a normal life. It was based on the books created by John Callahan.
Series is about the title character, who uses a wheelchair, emphasizing that he lived a normal life. It was based on the books created by John Callahan.